#what were you joking about like the egg thing seems so ingrained in everyone's brain i wonder if it's really hbomberguy who first made that

[hayheadd]

can anyone tell me what the pathologic fandom was like before 2018 or even like 2012. 2005........

[legendofmorons]

Wonderland -Prolouge

Hi! This has been a brain worm for like a year now. This is a series where it's like a choose your own adventure. I have a story line thay stems from this song for each Link (minus Wind).

I DON'T KNOW WHEN I'LL POST THE REST BUT I WILL (I'LL probably start posting towards the end of how to fall in love twice)

Pairing: Chain x reader

Rating:G

Summery: you reminisce on your time eith your ex lover. Some good, some bad.

Warnings: This is a song fic, it has the lyrics in italics.

Other: You don't need to read this to enjoy the rest of the series.

-------

Flashing lights and we took a wrong turn, and we fell down the rabbit hole. You held on tight to me 'Cause nothing's as it seems spinning out of control

Eveyrtime you fell through a portal it was like all the air was sucked out of your body and you were mixed around like scrambled eggs.

The way your head spins after it is entirely too ingrained into your memory. You still get nauseous at the very thought.

When they opened under you the one time you screamed as you grabbed onto your beloved hero, gripping his hand like a lifeline.

He let out a shout of surprise as the ground leaves him but his grip on you was strong even after the world stopped spinning.

The gentle way he made sure you were okay afterwards will never leave you.

Didn't they tell us don't rush into things? Didn't you flash your bright eyes at me? Haven't you heard what becomes of curious minds?

You can remember all your elders warning you not to rush into life, love, or danger. You didn't listen.

You took on Ganon in place of your at the time three year old brother. Then again three years later. Without any hesitation.

You tried not to rush into romance, but then he showed up. Kind, courageous, and someone who understands your history.

He pulled you into his gravity with nothing but a smile or smirk and his eyes flashing bright with joy.

He was curious, always asking about you and your history. His questions giving you hope.

But curiosity always leads to things you don't wanna know. Like the girl he's probably dating or going to date.

Ooh didn't it all seem new and exciting? I felt your arms twisting around me. I should've slept with one eye opened at night

Your first date was exhilarating. He'd taken you to a festival where you all danced for hours. It was beautiful and loud and just like him.

The way his arms wrapped around you made you feel so safe and cared for. Gentle but strong and warm.

The sway of your dance made you giddy as you laughed at his jokes.

If you'd been more aware of things- it would all hurt so much to think about now.

We found wonderland, you and I got lost in it, and we pretended it could last forever, eh. We found wonderland, You and I got lost in it, and life was never worse but never better, eh

You remember nights spent with a shared watch shift, cuddled up by the fire as you talk about anything and everything that can be talked about.

It was too easy, falling into a domestic routine. Checking on each other after fights. Patching each other up.

Giving small gifts. Gentle touches.

You would have given anything to make it last. You tried to believe that it could last.

And yeah… Everything was awful. You were being hunted down by some immortal godlike shadow. But also- you were happily in love!

So we went on our way too in love to think straight. All alone or so it seemed. But there were strangers watching, and whispers turned to talking, and talking turned to screams

You remember taking the quest on with a new found lightness. His hand in your's as you both ignored the monster attacks increasing.

You find yourself being watched by strangers everywhere you go, but you both think it's funny.

They are just jealous.

You remember the first argument you had though, the way your voices all raised. His, your's and everyone else's.

Ooh didn't it all seem new and exciting? I felt your arms twisting around me. It's all fun and games, still somebody loses their mind

You remember how thrilling each first in your relationship was. How gentle he was with you even if it clashed with his mature. He cherished you.

How he held you after your nightmares. Arms around you feeling so secure.

It was exciting, planning a future where he was in it. He adored the plans you made with him. He told you so.

And it was al so fun- until the end. Until the last portal opened and you watched him leave you standing alone. The last to go through you had a break down.

Oh darling, we found wonderland, you and I got lost in it. And we pretended it could last forever, eh. We found wonderland, you and I got lost in it. And life was never worse but never better, eh

You spend hours remembering it all. The first touch, first kiss, the way he held your face in his hands.

His voice plays in your head too often. And you would rather not hear it. It hurts too much.

You remember his hands in yours as you watched the clouds and the stars alike roll slowly across the skies. It was perfect.

It was. Even when you were all attacked over and over. You always had his back and he had your's.

I reached for you, but you were gone. I knew I had to go back home. You searched the world for something else to make you feel like what we had. And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad

You woke up the first morning after your return home only to reach for him to the other side of your bed. Your hand found sheets and it had been heart wrenching to remember he was thousands of years in the past.

You knew you couldn't stay with him. That your home needs you. That Hylia was not so kind to let you be happy together. And it still hurts

You wonder if he moved on? Did he have a family?

Selfishly, you hope he didn't. That he kept searching for traces of you.

[vestedbeauty]

Guilty of People Pleasing? How to Stop (Even if This Is How You've Survived Until Now)

New Post has been published on https://vestedbeauty.com/guilty-of-people-pleasing-how-to-stop-even-if-this-is-how-youve-survived-until-now/

Guilty of People Pleasing? How to Stop (Even if This Is How You've Survived Until Now)

OK, so, it’s possible that my people pleasing way of life was just coded into me based on the stars and planets. I’m not personally really into astrology but a lot of people I love are. So, I’ve learned that I may be the Libra-est Libra who ever Libra’d. And apparently people pleasing is a thing for us. 

But while I weigh that a bit (sorry, Libra joke), I’m going to go share my thoughts on this… trait? Flaw? Coping mechanism? Well, whatever category people pleasing falls into, let’s take a look.

It’s a Good Thing Puppies Are Cute

She’s nearly four now but Pickle has settled down a whole lot. (I’m currently working through a dog training course with her and the rest of the pack to see if we can end the jumping up on people nonsense.) When she was tiny, she did a pretty good impression of The Very Caterpillar. She ate through our slippers. She ate through our blankets. She even ate through the drywall in a couple of places.

“Pickle, it’s a good thing you’re cute,” we said, about a million times. And it’s true.

It’s the same with tiny humans. They smell bad. They cry and cry and cry. And they leave their parents exhausted to the point they can barely remember their own names. But on the deepest level there is, we bond with them to the point we’d give our lives to save them.

Still, it’s a good thing they’re cute.

In part, a baby’s cuteness is a way of people pleasing. We cannot function or even survive on our own. Our survival depends on our parents being willing to take care of us, even though we offer nothing in return. 

Last One In Is a Rotten Egg!

Fast-forward a few years, and our world expands from our parents and immediate family outward to include friends, teachers, and a whole lot of people we’ve never met. Humans being humans, we start forming smaller groups. 

Like it was programmed into us, we can get pretty ruthless as we sort through the crowd of humanity. Yes to this one, no to that one. We find best friends and second-best friends (remember that?), and we learn how to fit in. 

But we also get some brutal lessons about living in kid society. We discover the pecking order, watching some kids rise to the top of the social order and others fall into a perilous place where they are practically untouchable. 

The permanent rotten egg, the kid nobody seems to like – even enough to defend when human decency demands it. (I still think about some of the kids I grew up with who were socially brutalized, bullied, cast out. I hope they survived and healed, and while I’m glad I didn’t actively hurt them, I shamefully lacked the courage to befriend them.)

In this Lord of the Flies world, kids learn quickly how important it is to gather allies. Perhaps for the first time ever, they grasp the reality that if they piss people off, they will be shunned and thrust out into the cruel world on their own. 

People pleasing becomes a survival mechanism. I believe that’s where it starts for many of us. We learn to walk, talk, and behave in ways that please our cohort enough to keep us safe.

Keep Your Hands and Feet Inside the Ride at All Times

It doesn’t take a genius to realize it’s crucial to fit into the box kid society draws for its members. Fit or face destruction. 

So, we contort ourselves to fit. If some odd bit refuses to fold neatly into the box, we cut it off. Survival demands ruthlessness.

… Got a weird hobby? Not anymore.

… Have a weird freckle on the bottom of your foot? Shoes, forever.

… Freaky smart at some subject or another? No. Get a ‘B’ and live.

… Set your sights on a career that seems a little “extra”? Probably don’t talk about that anymore.

It’s not like that for everyone, of course. And there are pockets of welcoming hearts who’ll accept people as they are, thank goodness.

But I suspect this is when many people pleasers develop their modus operandi. People pleasing can look like:

Having a hard time saying no (or even wanting to)

Feeling gutted if someone’s displeased with you

Agreeing with what others decide because you know you can make anything work

Feeling like you’re responsible for other people’s emotions or experiences

Apologies… so many apologies… for everything

Conflict avoidance at any cost

A persistent craving for praise from others

Inability to admit or express “negative” emotions

Struggling to make decisions that impact other people

This nasty list makes sense when you understand that a people pleaser weighs the safety of every word, step, and choice. It makes even more sense when you realize they may have zero experience moving through the world in any other way.  

When Enough Is Enough

As a young woman, I took all of this to the next level by choosing a very public life as a pastor’s wife for a couple of decades. Pairing my childhood fascination with Emily Post’s etiquette book with the deep desire to be a good example, I had that box’s contents under control. The stakes seemed to be of eternal significance, after all. 

But I learned something huge, courtesy of one of many youth group outings that ended with dinner. It took decades for this lesson to register, but now I can’t unsee it.

“Kids don’t know diddly-squat about what’s good and what’s not good.”

Given the choice between filet mignon and a burger from McDonalds, pretty much every kid in every youth group we ran would choose the golden arches. I could rattle off a bunch of similar examples, but you get it. Discernment comes with age. 

That’s why the nerd gets the girl… later in life. Once we can embrace our greatness, right in the face of a crowd that punishes outliers, we flourish. We can become who we were always meant to be. Not coincidentally, that’s when we also find deep personal fulfillment and a sense of finding and fulfilling our purpose.

Allowing some pre-pubescent ghost from decades gone by to dictate how you show up in the world just seems silly. That whole threat to expel you from society for not fitting in becomes laughable. 

I mean, it’s not even a thing anymore, anyway. 

Who, in the adult world, roams the halls of their home or workplace, shoving people into lockers? What adult taunts someone else about what they brought for lunch – or the fact that person dared to eat when people could see them? And what adult torments another adult for having a passionate interest in an offbeat hobby? 

Ridiculous.

You’re Not the Boss of Me!

I’m half-obsessed with Scotland. Many of my family’s roots start there. I freaking love that place, the music, the terrain, the food, the whisky, the spirit of the people – it’s got my heart. Anderson there is like Smith or Jones in America. The Anderson crest reads “Stand Sure.”

Oh, the irony.

That hit me hard as 2020 came to a close. It was both the best and the worst motto I could imagine. These two words, I’d seen on a crest on the wall for as long as I could remember. But it wasn’t really for me.

Some people, as a new year approaches, choose a word for the new year to embody for them. I chose “Stand Sure.”

It felt dangerous. Like, I knew this was going to impact my whole “tread lightly” philosophy in life. I had absolutely zero ideas about how I’d possibly go about addressing my people pleasing. It was so ingrained in me, like when a surgeon refuses to cut out a brain tumor because the brain has grown around it. Or, like separating conjoined twins. This seemed like something I’d just have to live with forever.

MindFix Did the Impossible

I’ve done some woo-woo stuff along my personal development journey. That includes walking on fire, walking on broken glass, climbing redwood trees and jumping off (harnessed in!) to grab a trapeze, and SO many seminars. They all helped me grow. A lot. But during a long weekend in January, I got to work with the team at MindFix. 

And it changed everything. But only in the areas where I’ve applied it so far (haha – only a few  amazing, miraculous changes!)

Going in, I knew roughly that I wanted to work on this whole people pleasing thing. That’s it. I didn’t know how to even describe it. It felt embarrassing, vague, and permanent. In fact, we never actually discussed it directly. We worked on some other things. It wasn’t until a few weeks later that I noticed its absence.

I can’t even begin to explain how Erin and her team do what they do. I won’t even try. 

But I can explain this…

I came to a realization that the SUPREME DIRECTIVE under which I’d lived most of my life… was proclaimed by a little kid. A little kid who’d choose a $.67 mass-produced burger over a delectable filet mignon. 

You Don’t Know Nuthin’ about Nuthin’

That kid did her best to protect me. To her, safety depended on fitting into a box. Anything that didn’t quite fit should be bent or lopped off.

I’d outgrown her in every way. But I was still listening to her, so life apart from people pleasing felt dangerous. I still exhibited most of the symptoms above – and those behaviors were hurting me.

The work we did helped me go after this dragon and slay it. In realizing that kid version of me was just trying to help, but really didn’t know how, it opened a whole new possibility… just being me.

I could see evidence indicating it was safe to shut her down.

I have weird hobbies (drone flying, chicken raising, classic VW ogling, front yard gardening – just for starters). Nobody torments me over that. (I mean, can you imagine how insane that would be?)

My mate and I are flat-out weird (so much ink, in bed by 7, both creatives – and that list goes on). Nobody follows us, taunting us. (I mean, we did get called the perfect insult in the VW restoration world… Billy-Bob shade-tree Chip Foos wannabes – I can’t even tell you how many giggles I’ve had over that pejorative on our YouTube channel.)

Even my work life is strange (I’ve discovered that the way my brain operates is REALLY unusual. Some would see it as a huge plus; others would find it perplexing.) 

And then there’s this one “flaw” that put me in danger of ostracism so much that I shut it down entirely… until I saw it differently and felt safe valuing it.

It’s my capacity to love, like geeking-out, human exclamation point levels of enthusiasm for certain people. (I always gathered that I was too sensitive, too excitable.) That one’s back in play big-time, and it adds incredible joy to my life. Like, one of my favorite things to do is to SEE someone’s greatness and then tell their story in a way that others see it, too.

If This Isn’t Irony…

So, “Stand Sure” is in play. 

Undoubtedly, there’s still a little kid inside, desperately trying to keep me in line by pleasing people. But she sure seems quiet these days.

I did crack up, though, when a colleague mentioned that since the start of the year, I’d really started to own my own value. He continued, “I’m not seeing that people pleasing way you used to show up.” And that… that pleased me greatly.

Who knows what else is possible? The best is yet to come.

[bluedouble]

Daylight

Short story attempt at tackling more mature romantic themes AKA everyone is crying. Definitely could have been better structured, but I'm starting to get an idea of how to let the characters speak for themselves and avoid projecting too much of myself into it.

Some sexual themes present, read after the break or here via fanfiction.net

As they wound their way down the old dirt path, Judy reflected on how much she enjoyed these trips to Bunnyburrow. She loved Zootopia, probably more than plenty of mammals who’d been born and raised there. The sights, sounds, and spectacles never stopped, and there was always something new to try. It was a city of a million souls and ten million problems, a tall order for a certain bunny cop determined to handle all of them personally.

But at least she didn’t have to do it alone. Despite their rough start, Nick had become a rock of support in her new life as a city cop. He kept her grounded, taught her how to focus on problems that could be solved instead of trying to save the whole world at once. Even when her impulsive streak ran them off the rails, Nick had a way of guiding and directing it to astounding results.

Nick was a microcosm of the city, which was exactly why she loved him so much. He was different in every way to her, a novelty in all respects. Even spending forty-plus hours a week together hadn’t dulled her enthusiasm. But the closer they got, the more worried she became.

To outsiders, he was always in control, with a smile and a scheme to get you to do exactly what he wanted. Months of proximity had shown her just how much of it was a mask though. Like the city, he depended on mammals not thinking about all the little cracks in the façade. The conflict and long-buried hurt that had been painted over with a veneer of civility and confidence. Bellwether for all her insanity had understood this, and brutally leveraged it against predators during the Nighthowler crisis.

Judy shivered. She knew Nick had a troubled childhood, but they hadn’t talked much about anything past that. He didn’t seem comfortable discussing it, and Judy didn’t want to pry it out of him.

She just wished she could help.

Back home, life was a lot simpler. Most things could be fixed with elbow grease and a kind word. Maybe a pie, if they were really upset.

Gotta remember to get one of Gideon’s daily specials for the trip back she thought, and continued up the trail.

==

Puffing and blowing, Nick finally caught up to her on the hilltop. He set the basket down and let out a melodramatic sigh.

“Ya know, it’s a good thing this basket isn’t full of picnic supplies or lugging it way out here would have been really difficult”, he groused.

Judy rolled her eyes. He had insisted on carrying everything, an oddly quaint gesture coming from someone so urbane. Besides, it wasn’t her fault that it was a two-mile walk.

Nick scanned the horizon, a hand over his brow to block the midday sun. “What’s so special about this place anyways?”

“Well, there’s nobody around for miles”

He shot her a glance. “Really?”

This was an unusual trait. Despite the Hopps Family Farm covering numerous acres, there always seemed to be a relative or three with their ears perked for some juicy gossip-fuel. Their relationship wasn’t a secret, in any case. It was just… complicated.

Perhaps there was a simple solution?

“Yup. Just you and me. Out here together. Alone.”

Nick’s face went stone cold. “Ms. Hopps, you’re trying to seduce me. Aren’t you?”

“M-maybe?”

Nick grinned and tapped her on the nose. “You’re gonna have to do better than that, sweetheart. Many have tried and few have succeeded at winning my affections.”

She rallied a bit. “I’ll be sure to interview your body pillow for the secret.”

With a laugh, he began unpacking their lunch. It was quite a feast for just two mammals, consisting of huge sandwiches, several side dishes, fresh-baked cookies, an impressive egg salad, and even a bottle of wine. Thank the burrow-news-network for that little addition, thought Judy. Once word got around that Jude the Dude and her dear partner were going for a private lunch, food, alcohol, and certain other impolite personal items were practically dumped on them by snickering siblings and winking aunts.

Nick had taken it all in stride of course, cracking an extremely rude joke that had set her brothers and uncles howling with laughter.

He fits in with them better than I do, she mused.

Their sizeable picnic was finally ready to go, spread out over the blanket. Nick picked up a sandwich and dug in with gusto. Judy settled for a small fruit salad, chewing thoughtfully.

“You know,” said Nick through a mouthful of food, “I can’t believe I let you drag me out here without my aviators.”

“What, so you could pull the ‘cool cop’ routine on my parents?”

Nick gave her a hurt look. “You wound me, carrots. To think I would have to stoop so low to impress my partner’s family is just shameful.”

She had to admit it would probably work though.

Judy got another spoonful of the delicious fruit medley before replying. “Then why do you need em?”

He rolled his eyes. “I’ll give you a hint: Night vision plus bright sun equals bad time for mister fox.”

“Wait, it’s because foxes are crepuscular, right?”

“Ding ding ding, ten points to junior scientist Hopps! And here I thought all you learned at the academy was how to write tickets and blackmail law-abiding citizens.”

Suddenly, he leaned over so that they were almost nose-to-nose.

“But since you’re so interested in vulpine biology, how about a private demonstration?”

Judy flushed, heart racing as his green eyes bored into her. There was a whiff of sandwich. She tried to respond, finished swallowing the bit of fruit still in her mouth, tried again and managed to speak in what she hoped was a suitably sultry tone.

“Lay it on me, slick.”

Real subtle there, Jude.

He cocked an eyebrow. “Sit tight fluff, you’re gonna enjoy this.”

With that, he sat back down and held one hand in the air, fingers together. He brought his other hand up and pretended to pull his thumb off with it; the most juvenile magic trick in history.

“Ta-daaa. Magic thumbs, see?”

Judy blinked once. Then twice. She got to her feet and walked right up to his stupid, grinning face.

“Of all the immature, conniving, dumb foxes in the city”, she said, punctuating each word with a punch to his shoulder, “You are the worst!”

But she was already starting to laugh, and Nick helped her along with a barrage of tickles. She returned the favor leaving him writhing on the blanket. Eventually they collapsed, sides aching and eyes watering.

==

Judy wondered if she’d made a mistake. Lunch had gone well enough, and with a little prodding she convinced Nick to join her in the bottle of wine.

“This is good stuff, Nick. Wolfson-Woolworth vintage merlot isn’t cheap these days”, she’d said.

Nick cast a derisive look at the bottle in her hands. “And risk having all my little secrets plied from drunken lips?”

“Oh, come on. I barely get tipsy from one bottle and you’re twice my size!”

In the end he relented, and now they were sipping from glasses in the summer sun. Judy tried to make small talk, wracking her brains for things they hadn’t already discussed at length. But as they worked through the bottle, Nick’s good cheer seemed to drain right out of him. Eventually they trailed off into silence punctuated by the rustle of trees and occasional bird call.

Judy’s silent introspection into just how badly one rabbit can mess up a simple lunch date was broken by a comment from Nick.

“Huh?” She’d missed it, senses slightly muddled by the fine wine.

“I said I’m sorry, carrots.”

She turned. He looked utterly defeated, a far cry from the confident hustler she knew.

“Nick, what’s the matter? You didn’t do anything wrong…“

“I didn’t do anything right, either.”

Voice cracking, Nick took a breath and regained his composure.

“I know how much you want to move this forward, Judy. I can see it eating you up inside. You can’t stand being in the middle of something, it’s either stay or leave.” A trace of his old smile returned. “It’s what makes you so damn endearing, honestly.”

Judy was livid. “You knew?! Why didn’t you just tell me yes or no then? Or was jerking me around too much fun for mister sly fox?!”

He winced. “That’s fair. I earned that one.” Her rebuke hadn’t shut him down, quite the opposite. Maybe rising to this sort of challenge was ingrained into him after years of hustling. “I never meant to hurt you, Judy. If nothing else, I promise you that.”

“Then why? Why push me away one moment, and lead me on the next?”

“Because I’m afraid of losing you, ok?! If we take the next step and it doesn’t work out, I dunno what I’d do with myself.” He visibly sank at the thought. “When you left the city, I was a wreck. The only mammal who’d ever believed in me, ever would believe in me was gone. I can’t go back to that, not anymore.”

Judy blinked back tears as she remembered the disastrous press conference. Nick must have been hit a lot harder than she thought, despite how quickly he seemed to get over it. She hesitated, then grabbed him in a hug. She felt him collapse in her arms, all pretense gone as he silently wept. Judy gave him a moment

“But I’m here now, Nick.” She lifted his chin with a paw, staring into his eyes. “And no matter what happens, you’ll always be my friend.” Tucking his head under hers, she went on. “You trust me, right?”

“With my life.”

Judy paused, choosing her words carefully. “I want you to be happy, Nick. You deserve so much more than what this world gave you. But I need you to stop thinking about yourself so much. You don’t have to suffer through this alone.”

Nick coughed. “Yeah…yeah. You’re right.” Puling himself together, he turned to face her directly. “Guess I was in a little too deep there” he said, wrapping her in a hug of his own.

“Yeah, you were. I was really worried about you, Nick”, she murmured into his shirt.

He rocked her slightly, at a loss for words. “Um. Sorry about that.”

An awkward silence fell, which Nick predictably broke within moments.

“Did your family really give you a pack of…them?”

Wordlessly, Judy reached into her bag and pulled out a handful of preventatives.

“And just my size, even. Great. Wow. No pressure, huh?”

“None at all.”

“Because a healthy relationship is based on-“ Judy put a finger gently to his lips.

“Nick? Sweetie?”

“Mmhm?”

“Please stop talking for a moment”

“Mmmk.”

“It’s my turn to show you a magic trick.”

“HM!?”

==

As they trudged back to the farm proper, Judy basked in warmth that seemed to fill her from the tips of her ears down to her toes. Now that she and Nick were on the same page, the crushing uncertainty that had been hanging over her like a guillotine had vanished. Nick wasn’t keeping her at arm’s length anymore, allowing and enjoying her touch while giving plenty of his own. Even his attitude felt more sincere, with all the energy he used to spend on dissembling and deceiving now turned towards finding out just how to push Judy’s buttons in an oh-so-right way.

And the sex was incredible, she thought. That little adventure was going in the memory bank for a while.

But she had to admit it was more of a heat-of-the-moment thing, a consequence of the intensity of the situation and relief of all that pressure.

Still, there was no denying this was going to be a welcome change. So many new avenues of their relationship were now open to explore, and Judy was eager to get started.