#which is weird because there are so many lizards where I live

[theshadowrealmitself]

Documentaries of animals are great for coming up with alien stuff, at least for me because most of the time I never really think about why an animal looks/acts like that or how an animal does what it does

Tsudilo Geckos of the Kalahari Desert have adhesive pads to grip rocks with, which I’m guessing most geckos have now, and tbh I never really thought about how geckos and lizards and stuff could do that, I just accepted that they could

But! Now that I’m aware, it’s a fun detail to think about with any alien species that might be reptilian, if you ever shook their hand, you might be ready for the scaliness, but their hands might also be sticky!

Also, Kalahari’s ostriches will have scarlet shins if they have high amounts of testosterone, so it’d be an interesting detail to add of an alien species having a body part that’s a different color/shade than the rest of them and why it looks different

[def-ace-ing-it]

Batfam head canons that I need to Expunge

(Some of these might actually be canon but who knows anymore)

• In a kitchen, Bruce Wayne can and has burnt water and has almost caused a building to burn down, all of which were on accident

• HOWEVER. If you sat Bruce in front of a campfire in a forested area and told him he had one hour to put together a meal, he would make the most delicious and nutritious plate you have ever eaten out of fungus and lizards and anything else he could scrounge up. This infuriates Alfred every time

• Bruce’s canines are sharper than most, as does Damian. No, they have not beaten the vampire allegations in or out of costume

• Despite being terrified of them, Bruce knows an absurd amount of bat facts as a way of coping

• Cass has a wide range of musical taste. She often flutters between genres being her favorite and will occasionally loop a song until it no longer gives her dopamine

• Cass wears a lot of bat paraphernalia i.e. bat earrings, bat ears, often Batman merchandise. She’s just very proud of her family and even if she can’t express it in public she wants everyone to Know how proud she is

• Jason mainly listens to punk rock and rap, but he does make an exception for pop punk SPECIFICALLY from the eighties

• Jason is one of the few people who has a direct line of contact to Talia, and while he barely uses it he will occasionally call to get a recipe from her because he misses the food he got while training

• Dick cannot decide whether he wants to keep his hair long or short, and he has considered bringing the mullet back to everyone’s horror

• During one of his rebellious streaks, Dick learned how to pole dance. Nobody but the Titans know this

• Stephanie ABSOLUTELY believed in unicorns as a kid, and though she’s not as much of a hardcore believer she’s still holding out hope with how weird the world is

• Stephanie also had one of those “I hate pink/purple phases”, she’s healing from it obviously <3

• Despite not even living with the Bats, Stephanie is the WORST clothes thief, because she steals Cass and Tim’s clothes which are in turn stolen from the others. Nobody has noticed yet

• Time hates how wearing a suit feels, but he often goes out of his way to make sure all of his suits fit well because damnit he’s gonna look good if he’s gonna be uncomfortable while wearing them.

• Tim hates the smell of alcohol, to the point where he’ll gag if the smell is too strong

• Damian is SEVERELY allergic to pollen because he wasn’t raised around it as a kid, he’s the only one in the family who can be taken out by spring and he gets pissy when it’s mentioned

• Damian has an impeccable sense of smell, more so than any of his siblings

• Babs is arguably the most stable of the batfam, but even then not really because she decided to become a vigilante without Batman’s training which was arguably worse than the rest of the family’s origins

• Barbara could never decide what she wanted to be when she grew up as a kid, she would always switch jobs every week

• None of the batfam is straight or neurotypical, let’s just state that here

• Everyone has an Assigned Color for galas and other public appearances, outside of that barely anyone wears their assigned color. All except for Bruce, whose wardrobe is exclusively made of black turtlenecks and the occasional dark grey hoodies because he refuses to wear anything other than his Assigned Color

• There is a persistent game of tag happening exclusively on patrol with a long list of rules to keep things “fair”, currently Tim is It. They’ve kept this from Bruce, but Alfred knows and is the one to remind them every patrol

• Somehow, Stephanie is the only one who hasn’t been It yet this cycle, and Jason has been It ten times so far and he is pissed about it

I have just… so many thoughts about them

[cccc-aus]

The CCCC x Pokemon Mystery Dungeon AU

(also I haven’t decided if I want to open up asks again yet, so don’t even bother)

So I was thinking about that one post I made a while back about a PMD AU. The result was this convoluted list of random compiled headcanons. Enjoy.

In General / Set-up

Takes place in a timeline where Soul did commit suicide after The Bidding just like he said he would, resulting in the events of Light never happening and the time loop ending prematurely

Basically, the Headspace was destroyed and the three died, but instead of the timeline resetting like normal they just showed up in the Pokemon world

This is an interesting case, because their memories are still intact, but they have absolutely zero idea what the hell a Pokemon is, so basically the opposite of typical PMD protagonists

In this universe, Pokemon are typically divided into sapients and non-sapients (or ‘ferals’)

As well as that, humans that show up in this world- since they’re, whilst very rare, still a known phenomenon- do so in forms that look distinct from the species they’re supposed to be, and more often than not as a completely different type as well!

When they wake up, they’re separated so it takes about a day for them to actually find each other, but they reunite rather easily. And so began the tale of the land’s latest and greatest rescue tea…

…sorry, did I say rescue team? Uh, no, no they’re not. They’re just a bunch of assholes who deeply despise their current situation, are absolutely certain that there’s a way back home despite what everyone tells them, and think the Mystery Dungeons are key to that.

They ain’t no heroes in this place, and that’s a fact. Just selfish jackasses who just happen to do lots of heroic stuff by coincidence while pursuing their own goals.

Heart

Heart is a Poison-type Sobble (that gains the Dark type upon evolving into Inteleon). He is also, unfortunately, still blind

It’s not like his biology actually matters since he’s the only member of this subspecies, but I’m going to include it anyways for context:

They’re supposed to live near caves (and urban areas, but only if it took place in a modern human world, which it doesn’t), navigating the world mostly through scent

Like many Poison-types, they get by by intentionally eating potentially harmful things in order to fuel their abilities

Poison Sobble specifically harness these powers as defence mechanisms, never attacking anything unless they think it intends to harm them (though they do feel threatened very easily…)

They’re also nocturnal, and spend most daylight hours in the aforementioned caves, as well as self-dug holes (ha) if there aren’t any safe hiding spots nearby

Anyways, back to Heart himself… well, he’s blind, and has no idea where he is besides the fact that he basically just died, so he probably just thought this was some weird purgatory for a while

He didn’t know why he was some kind of lizard thing all of a sudden, or why his sense of smell was so strong, and the only thing he still had with him was his blindfold, which he got understandably attached to as it was the only thing he had left

Though, by the time he was just starting to process the idea of being a gross lizard thing for the rest of his life, Mind found him, and god he had never been happier to hear that asshole’s voice in his life.

They stayed close together for the next few hours (though Mind was still tempted to wash his hands afterwards, even before he found out the lizard he was holding hands with the whole time was actually poisonous), until eventually they found Soul

Once he gets used to it, though that takes a while, he gets pretty content with the idea of staying for the rest of their lives, though he still prefers the Headspace

He does have a lot of sleepless nights there, though: partly because he’s nocturnal, and partly because there’s no way he didn’t get nightmares at some point about the fact that he literally died a few days ago

Oh, and once he evolves into Inteleon, his blindfold comes off, and his eyes inexplicably grow back! So he’s very happy about that

Mind

Mind is an Electric-type Snivy (that gains the Steel type upon evolving into Serperior)

They shed their skins once every year, and the shed skin comes off in a form resembling a leather jacket that they carry around with them (see art of Snivy!Mind that I reblogged from my main blog awhile back)

They mainly eat feral Water-type Pokemon, since I figure eating things that are weak to electricity is a good way to fuel that power

Though, just because they can generate their own electricity, that still doesn’t mean they won’t go to rather bizarre lengths to store as much as possible…

…”rather bizarre lengths” totally not meaning “climbing up to the top of metal poles during thunderstorms trying to get struck by lightning, and then getting all giddy and cackling like madmen with euphoria on the off chance it actually works”.

Anyways, when he first woke up in that world, he… dealt with it. He liked being able to eat and sleep again after so long of being a robot. He didn’t like… anything else.

For hours on end, he could hardly walk with Snivy’s tiny-ass twig legs. He had to crane his head around like a bird’s just to get a good look at anything with eyes like that. As well as far more hateable things about his new body and new home.

He was still concerned for Soul even after he basically killed them all, but he would deny being worried about Heart until his dying breath. Either way, he still tried to go look for them as soon as he got a hang of moving around in his new form.

He’s easily the one who hates it there the most. Too illogical, with all the superpowered animals that can talk sometimes and can’t the rest of the time.

He’s basically the driving force keeping the other two focused on getting back home like they all promised

He finds it easy to get caught up in the whimsy of the Pokemon world… but less in the “wow this place is so cool!” way and more in the “WHY IS IT CALLED THAT. EVOLUTION MY ASS THAT IS CLEARLY METAMORPHOSIS.” way.

Like Heart, he probably also has nightmares about dying in the Headspace, but tries his best to just suck it up and deal with the trauma

Soul

Soul is a Psychic-type Torchic (that gains the Dragon type once it evolves into Blaziken)

I haven’t decided how its biology would work, so I’ll have to skip that part but

Once he shows up there, he decides he pretty much loves the idea of being a psychic chicken for the rest of what’s basically his afterlife… until he realises Heart and Mind are there too.

Mind slaps him the first time they reunite, resulting in yet another petty sibling fight, and eventually Soul reluctantly agrees to help them all get home. (Though of course, he did subconsciously miss Heart and Mind quite a bit, even if he didn’t realise it.)

Even after that agreement he still doesn’t hide the fact that he greatly prefers being a psychic chicken to the shit he used to go through in the Headspace.

Once he evolves into Combusken, he probably makes many a joke about the fact that he is a cock that’s also shaped like a cock.

He would also have frequent nightmares at some point, but not about his death. It’s about the fact that he could potentially be stuck as one third of a whole for the rest of his existence.

He feels like he can’t escape Heart and Mind, and what they made him into. Of course, it’s not actually their fault, but he still blames them for it, because it’s convinient.

For now, though, he’ll just enjoy spending the rest of the foreseeable future as a psychic, draconic rooster.

[smol-and-scared]

G/t Analysis: Gods Among Mice

Before I begin, I want to say two things:

This post is not meant to disparage anyone or question their value as people, all of this is exploration of linguistics, its cultural implications and potential narratives that could arise from them.

It is not a statement of fact or a claim I’m making.

Also… Let’s put aside the “Step on me Goddess” bullshit that has unfortunately plagued much of the g/t community’s DMs (It deserves to be called out, but not what this is about)

I will be using ‘God’ as a gender-neutral term here.

The God-like power of Size💪

Throughout history, Gods have often been depicted as being physically massive. This makes sense, as physical power is the most easily understood form of power. Likewise, a creature's size is one of the most universally recognized sign of one's physical power. So it's a good way to instantly depict the strength of a God. And these depictions have had a weird memetic side effect: The idea that 'massive size' makes a creature 'God-like'.

This does have a bit of psychological merit. If mountain-sized Giants actually existed, (without our arch-nemesis: 🔥the fucking square-cube law🔥) their full size and strength would be so hard for humans to understand that their power is basically arbitrary. At which point it becomes indistinguishable from Godhood. Also, our primitive lizard-brains evolved to fear much larger creatures. And fearing your gods is a major part of many religions.

Because of this there are dozens upon dozens of G/t fics, comics, etc; where the larger party is compared to or (metaphorically) referred to as, a God. In the case of actual giants and characters growing larger, this makes complete sense and is usually well-suited to the narrative.

But in my eternal quest for more angst™ I’ve recently started to question it’s use in Human/tiny stories. It feels kinda… lazy? I mean, not in the context of the story, many fantastic fics do it. But it just feels like it was copied over from the giant fics and never fully questioned or explored.

Okay, but what if: 🤏 smol.

Now obviously, all of this depends on the exact size difference, scenario and world-building of the story. But I still think it applies to a huge amount of fics who play up the Human/tiny size difference as ‘God-like’.

I personally think If a tiny views their resident human as a God-like figure (with all of the fear and awe that entails) …then they are optimistically delusional.

Because Gods are, in most cultures, special.

I have yet to see a fic where the Tiny is struck by the simple and harrowing realization that the humans they view as unstoppable, God-like entities are... in fact, painfully average.

It’s one thing to live in terror of the massive entity that could kill you in an instant. It’s an entirely further step to realize that there are dozens, if not hundreds of them between you and the nearest human-free environment.

And what if the Tiny realizes that their human isn’t even average? Imagine their horror when they realize that the person who is so big and powerful that they can barely even grasp it… is some 4’ 3” (~130cm) little stick? And the average human could snap ‘their human’ in half like a stale fuckin’ Cheeto.

Objectively, the Tiny knew this. They knew that the human they live with was small and weak compared to the others. But they never had an opportunity to actually understand it. And nothing gets that message across like seeing the 'God' of their tiny little world casually picked up and playfully carried on someone’s shoulder.

And It still gets worse...

Depending on the setting, the Tiny may not know or feel connected to any kind of civilization (A borrower colony, a scavenger camp, etc). This is especially true if Tinies are rare and/or oppressed.

And if that Tiny were to realize how average their 'God-like' human was? It would break them in the most pitiful way.

Because that ‘God’ isn’t a god. They’re average. They have a job. They have hobbies and friends. Things that this Tiny could never even dream of having. And that’s normal. That’s expected. They get to live, instead of just survive. Because they’re a person and that’s what people do.

And if their ‘God’ is just a person-

“Then…what does that make me?”

In conclusion:

I believe a character referring to someone as a God/Goddess implies that the speaker is a ‘person’ and they are looking at something greater. It’s ‘Normal’ looking up at ‘Godhood'.

But given the right story, plus a healthy amount of fear and awe. I think many Tinies would start to understand how small they are. And that they’ve been looking up at ‘Normal’ the whole time.

[accessible-tumbling]

Video description: The Quora site is displayed and the narrator, who has a British accent and is speaking quickly and excitedly, opens by reading from it: "My MacBook Air weighs 2.3 pounds. If I download more files on it, will it make it heavier?

"This is Quora," he continues. "A place where once grand intellectual questions would be mused over. But if you recall, 2 years ago we sadly bid farewell to our friend, Yahoo Answers, a place where those sorts of questions didn't happen, and in that time it seems many Yahoo users have made Quora their new home.

"Do chimpanzees get pregnant? Does anyone live on the sun? How high do planes fly when landing? What percentage of people are going to die? Do lesbians get periods?"

(A response to that question is read in a gruff tone:) "Oh, come on! Where the hell are you getting that question?"

"You are sleeping with your partner and suddenly realize that he/she is a ghost. What would you do? Are there werewolves in Texas? Why does the sausage have two ends? What happens to the time it takes to actually time travel into the past/future? Which hole does an actress push out a baby in a birth sense?"

(Another answer is read:) "She doesn't. She acts."

"I heard that in the Middle Ages, nobles used to wipe their butts with ducklings. Is that right?"

(Response, gruffly:) "No!"

"Is it true that pregnant women should not sleep during a lunar or solar eclipse as it may cause harm to the unborn?"

(Response:) "No. That's the dumbest thing I ever heard."

"Can I sue Germany for putting my grandfather in prison for 7 years in the second world war?"

(Response:) "No, no, no, no, no!"

"Can you think of a sentence that contains the words 'book' and 'crabs'?"

(Response:) "Well, yes, I can."

"Why does the 'bros' abbreviation for 'brothers' end in 's' instead of 'th'?"

(Response:) "Because that would spell 'broth'."

"Do rich people get embarrassed that their servants know what their stuff in the toilet looks like?"

(Response:) "This is a very weird question."

"What happens when we wash vessel and use it with water in which a lizard was dead? Is it poisonous? What can we do?"

(Response:) "Uhh..."

"Why does the United States promote homosexuality and not consider what happened in the petrified village of Pompeii?"

(Response:) "Wha…?"

"How can I have sex with Asia?"

(Response:) "Pretty sure you mean an Asian girl."

"Is Israel on the world map? Are the Irish really from Ireland? My son speaks Arabic. (in a panicked, shouting tone:) What do I do? Does India have airports?"

(Response:) "Putin came to India in 2014 swimming in the ocean. I have a photo to prove." (A flash of a picture of Putin swimming can be seen briefly at this point in the video.)

"Where do animals live? Why are things? What is my date of birth? Do you know a microscope? Real mathematicians (in all caps): I have 5 live cows and then I multiply them by 0. How then do you come and tell me that I end up with 0? Where did the 5 go? Which is larger: 0 or 2+7? Math math what is angle?

(Narrator comment: "I do believe this Quora user was intending to ask 'what are the names of the most powerful angels?' but…) What are the names of moist powerful angles? I'm an atheist who believes in God. What should I do? Why do atheists watch fiction movies? During airplane turbulence, how do atheists keep calm?"

(Narrator comment: "This question I could only find an old link for, even Quora went nowhere, not even, that is way too stupid:) How do atheists know what foods are 'sweet' versus 'sour' or 'bitter'?

"I am 11 and stand at 5 foot 2. Am I obese? Do celebrities fart? What's the meaning of a single white egg left at my door? (narrator's comment: that is weird.)

"My mom slapped her own bum in front of me what does that mean? Is this correct, 'similarvgbhujkljhgtyhujk'? Why is Zelda so 'thicc' in Breath of the Wild? Do demons always say 'I am a demon' when they are introduced? Is it possible to balance your entire body on your penis?"

(Response:) " Yes, but I'm scared of heights."

"I saw the cop the gay eating a raw bird in my backyard. What should I do?" (Narrator comment: "I became a bit obsessed with this question, it's so indecipherable and googled it for clues to find apparently there was much debate on the site about whether this was a weird autocorrect from 'cat'. Which word was supposed to be cat?")

"Can deaf people laugh out loud? Can deaf people do surfing? How do def people know what facial expressions look like and how they're used outside of American Sign Language (ASL)? If so, how do they learn about them if there's no way to see someone else make that face?" (Narrator comment: "I mean, I don't think there's any intelligent questions actually left on this site, is there? Who's asking 'Can music cause candle to light?' Obviously, no!")

"Do people still eat mashed potatoes? (Yes!) Can semen travel up your foot? (No,, it cannot.) Is the word 'stay asleep' alwasy spelled 'J'? (I don't even know what that means.) Do lobsters pee from their faces? (Uh, ugh, are you mad? Obviously no!)"

(Response:) "Yes, as others have pointed out, many crustaceans have two different types of excretory organs, both near the head. Usually only one is used, depending on the age of the animal. Lobsters and crabs, etc, use their urine smell like cats, to mark territory, warn rivals, etc." (Uh..oh.)"

The screen goes white and the scene transitions to footage of the narrator walking up to a door. He places an egg on the mat, then runs away.

End video description.

[bittsandpieces]

How much of a conspiracy theorist? Like...we live under a dome, lizard people, etc. How deep does the rabbit hole go?

He believed in "star children", which is the idea that some people are actually not human, but instead are the souls of celestial beings that choose to come to earth to help other people. He believed *he* was a star child.

He also believed the government was regularly conducting experiments on us via medicine

We dated in late 2021. You might be able to see where this is going. I had only found out about his more... unusual beliefs like a week earlier, and hadn't decided what to do about it. I ended up with the opportunity to get the covid vaccine at the same time as my mom even though it wasn't open to my age group yet, because our local clinic had so much extra that they just wanted to vaccinate as many people as possible. I had to cancel my next date with him to get the vaccine, he got VERY weird about it when I told him why I was canceling. Called me the next day to try to talk me out of it, because he firmly believed that covid was A: invented by China, B: was not real (don't ask me how those two make sense together), and C: that the covid vaccine was actually the US government mass editing our DNA.

So, for obvious reasons, I told him he was an idiot and blocked his phone number

[sketchyonlooker]

< A camera feed comes into view.

Numerous monsters and dragons are seen through Domino City. Some of them are climbing buildings, others are blocking traffic. Nothing appears to be getting damaged, but given that some of these creatures are as tall as a building, their presence causes panic in the masses. Several men and women are running away from a purple two-headed dragon in the middle of the road. They're screaming in fear, some of them trampling over each other.. A white gecko-like creature is climbing the walls of a building, tongue flicking as if catching a bug. Several police cars are surrounding it with the policemen pointing their weapons at it. An officer with a megaphone seems to be demanding its surrender. Other scenes are playing out on the live stream as if the recorder is moving very fast from place to place. A window-in-window video can be seen in the bottom right corner of the stream.> ----- < A screen-in-screen video is currently playing. Seto Kaiba is in front of a podium with hundreds of reporters pointing their microphones at him. The camera that is observing Kaiba appears to be one of the few in front. There's a hint of unease in the air, and that unease seems to be fueling the many questions being fired now. Many of the questions are outright accusatory. There were so many questions being asked that it all just turned into noise. Nothing coherent could be heard. However, as soon as Kaiba opened his mouth, the media fell silent. "After these events, we've shut down our Solid Vision systems for extensive testing. However, during this time, the monsters were still appearing; therefore, these sightings are unrelated to KaibaCorp. Something else has to be causing this."

---

DMGBeloved (v): omg. Of course you're covering this Sketchy.

CardGamesSon (v): Guys guys! I was in the middle of a duel when my Duel Disk suddenly died. Did something happen at KaibaCorp?

CardGamesSon (v): Oh hey, Sketchy's back to covering Duel Monsters? I thought they were on a food tour around the world thing.

Capu4Life (v): i hate the fact that when something weird is happening in japan, my first thought was this channel.

Capu4Life (v): then again, clearly the alien has the most up to date news.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): @/CardGamesSon : KC shut the Solid Vision down because Duel Monsters appeared all around Domino City. The fact that nothing happened despite the shutdown means that KC is not responsible. Which begets the question who is and why are they doing this.

ManDuckPig (v): Dude. It looks like someone developed Solid Vision like KC did. Except they did it better.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): NONSENSE. KC could do the very same thing if they felt like it. It's just that they're not out to disrupt society like all this crap is doing.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Seriously, if this is some sort of publicity stunt for a new hologram system, they've gone about it the worst way. I heard that several accidents happened because they got scared of a duel monster suddenly appearing in the road. Each one of those is a lawsuit.

I'mYourDaddy (v): yeah. That's me. Curse of Dragon decided to divebomb me while I was in my Jetty, and I swerved right into a fire hydrant.

CardGamesSon (v): OMG. Are you okay?

DMGBeloved (v): You okay?

Capu4Life (v): of course he is. if he wasn't, he wouldn't be here. lol. of course, he is a card game playing nerd. they don't run on common sense.

I'mYourDaddy (v): Thanks for your words of care, especially Capu4Life :^). But yeah I'm okay. My poor Jetty, not so much. I think I totaled it.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Sounds like it's time to finally get a new car. The fact you still had that two decade old hunk of metal is a travesty.

I'mYourDaddy (v): Hey. Don't rag on my Jetty. It took a hydrant for me. :^(

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): ::marik_creepy_eye_roll.jpg::

I'mYourDaddy (v): :^)

DMGBeloved (v): All the Duel Monsters here are dragons and lizards in this part of town. Where's my Dark Magician Girl?

Capu4Life (v): maybe she got eaten by a dragon lol

DMGBeloved (v): I'll feed you to a dragon. ::kaiba_death_glare_at_lumis.jpg::

CardGamesSon (v): Anyone know how long Solid Vision will be down? We were having a small weekend tournament - and going back to the playmats is gonna be such a drag.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): No. Probably not until this mess is unraveled. Geez. It's like a feeding frenzy on the news and social media.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Major news outlets are accusing KaibaCorp of lying about shutting down Solid Vision and that they actually can't turn it off. Or that terrorists hijacked the technology and are using it for nefarious ends.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Ugh. KC stock took a major hit just now. And it seems like the media is trying to hit them while they're down. Assholes.

Capu4Life (v): the smallest violin in the world is playing for you, rich boy.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Shut up.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Wait. This seems familiar.

Capu4Life (v): well yeah, it's a pretty common insult, 20-to-life.

I'mYourDaddy (v): How so?... Oh wait. I think I know what you're talking about. Yeah.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Remember Duelist Kingdom. And the media was constantly attacking KaibaCorp after Kaiba went supposedly comatose. And later on there were signs of an attempted hostile takeover because someone was buying up stocks while the prices were down from the scandal.

I'mYourDaddy (v): I remember that. Someone asked to buy my KC stocks at a premium, 50% more than it's worth in fact. I held onto it cause you told me to lol. Turned out the buyer was connected with I2.

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): And you made bank, right? I'm one of the best investors in the world after all. Anyway, doesn't this seem very similar? In any case, it's time to add more KC stock to my portfolio. I gotta protect my nest egg, even if it's just a little.

Capu4Life (v): i'm surprised you talk to BEBD outside of duel monsters, @/I'mYourDaddy. how do you deal with his general smarminess?

I'mYourDaddy (v): Ah well. What can I say? I'm good at getting along with people from all walks of life, even the crooked ones. :^)

BlueEyesBlondeDragon (v): Shut up. You both suck.

CardGamesSon (v): lol

I'mYourDaddy (v): lol

Capu4Life (v): lol

[evolutionsvoid]

The first thing to note is that the Tarasque is not a True Dragon, as it is a mammal and thus completely out of the realm of belonging to that family. I know that will upset some folk, but that is how classifications work! Despite their scaled parts and intimidating shell, they are not reptiles, and thus not True Dragons. As I said, they are a mammal species, one that possesses a bulky, spiky shell, a wicked long tail and six legs. I will also point out that having six limbs does not automatically make you a True Dragon either, which is insane that I have to argue against that idea. Some folk have gotten it into their heads that only real dragons have six limbs: your four legs, two wings scenario. They will prattle on and on about differences between dragons, wyverns, wyrms, and what not, all on the basis of how many appendages they have. Oh, is it that easy then? Well, has anyone notified the ants yet of their apparent dragonhood? What of the beetles? Or shall I say, beetle dragons?! Goodness, why don't I graft myself two extra arms onto myself and become a dragon! It's that easy! What a load of rot. If we followed such guidelines, the whole classification system would be in shambles. May I remind you that not all True Dragons actually have six limbs? Some only have four, or two, or even none at all! You may think this impossible, as how can a classified group such as this have such wild variation, but my I point your attention to the lizards. Lizards can have four or two or no legs, this is because they are either lost or extremely reduced. Same thing is what has happened to the True Dragons, starting with six and then whittling it down as they have split and adapted to new ecosystems and lives. Now I must cease this discussion now before it consumes the entire entry! Now where were we?

The Tarasque is quite the beast, with its appearance making it very obvious on why it has been included in so many legends and tales. They walk upon six, clawed limbs, carrying a massive spiked shell on their back. Their whole body hangs with shaggy green hair, making it look like they dress themselves with grass or swamp weeds. Their tail is long and prehensile, able to strike like a serpent with its wicked point. The head is horned and ends with a feline muzzle. Some folk think it looks like an absolute monster, while others believe it was cobbled together from random leftover parts. Turtle shell, lion head, snake-like tail and what not. No matter what you feel, the Tarasque is a real creature, and it can be found in temperate climates, particularly around forests and water bodies. Rivers, lakes and ponds are favorites, and typically one Tarasque will claim an entire pond to itself, or large portions of a lake or river. When they find a good place to call home, they dig holes in the ground to act as their nest, or perhaps claim a nearby cave. The hole isn't anything impressive compared to what most people think, just a round chunk of missing earth where they can rest themselves so only the shell is exposed. They will do the same in water, lying in the shallows with only their shell and nose poking out. Though they are massive and bulky, they are quite slow. Tarasques do not believe in doing anything fast. Or at least 90% of the Tarasque thinks so.   

When you lay your eyes upon the Tarasque, one shudders to think what they eat. Such a fearsome look and size must mean a vicious appetite! Only knights and virgins for this beast, they will eat nothing else! I really don't know why legends write like that, it is really weird. Human tales would make you believe there is a whole swathe of animals on this earth that eat nothing but fair maidens. They partake in virgophagy! I am sure there is some kind of hidden message or subtext to all this, but I can't (or refuse to) wrap my head around it. No, Tarasques are omnivores, and not very picky ones at that. Anything they can get their claws on is good enough. Or rather, whatever their tail can take down. Though the beast is slow, their tail moves at a different speed then the rest of them, moving like an angry snake and striking as if it had fangs. It writhes and dances through the air, guided by the nose and ears, waiting for prey to get close. Since they move so slow and hide in water, they blend in with their environment, allowing thirsty creatures to come to them. When prey gets close, the tail whips forward and jabs them. If the prey is small, they will probably die from impalement, but if they are big, they will flee with a simple flesh wound.

It should be noted that the tail of the Tarasque has no venom glands, yet it is poisonous. The Tarasque's mouth drips with poison, with it riding on their very breath. They frequently anoint their own tails with it, which is capable of absorbing this toxin and saving it for the hunt. Prey that is pierced by them shall fall victim to this poison, perishing within the hour. At that point, the Tarasque follows the trail and scent to its fallen prey and enjoys! In some cases, if the head of the animal is close to where the Tarasque is hiding, they may simply rise up and belch out a poison cloud. When they inhale it, the effects work fast and cause prey to stumble and falter. This is typically enough for it to rise from its resting position and finish the job with tooth and claw. 

It should be noted that they don't always hunt food like this, as sometimes the Tarasque is open to easier meals. Scavenging carcasses is an option, as well as munching on fallen fruits nuts or whatever they can dig up with their claws. When in water, they often scour the bottom for any goodies buried in the muck. It is jokingly said that their diet of muddy lake plants, fish and carcasses is what makes their breath so deadly. A joke more fitting for a cockatrice, I would say, but that's just me ruining the fun. 

The tails and teeth are not just for hunting, but for protecting itself and its territory. Tarasques stake out large chunks of forest and river, and they don't like any other sizeable beast getting in their way. If another Tarasque comes poking around, their anger is terrifying to behold. They rise from the water like some kind of leviathan, their spikes changing to a violent red, and they let out a powerful roar. The two will do battle, trading claw swipes, tail stabs and crushing bites until a victor is decided. Whoever wins gets the spot, and the other must limp off in defeat. This nature is also why Tarasque are so infamous and feared, as they aren't the only species that wants these waters. Fisherman, traders and recreational boaters will find that a Tarasque is an ornery landlord that won't hesitate to take you out if you disturb them. They are particularly troublesome when it comes to rivers, because folks upstream can easily float down into Tarasque territory without knowing it. It may be smooth sailing for miles and hours at end, but then you unknowingly hit the one section of river that has a waiting Tarasque and that ominous shell begins to rise up before you. Tarasques that are infamous in certain regions can be easily identified by their scarred shells, where it is obvious that no claw did this, but rather the impact of a boat as the beast attacked the intruder. They typically capsize boats by getting in their path or ramming them, then use tail, tooth and claw to finish off floundering passengers. Those who seek to slay them will face heavy armor, thick fur and a poisonous breath. Don't think you can easily out maneuver them, because that tail makes up for their slow pace. You wouldn't believe how many stories have slayers on horseback thinking they can run circles around the creature, only to have their horse killed with a tail stab and the fallen riders instantly being shredded by horrible claws. It makes for a terrifying tale, but a frustrating one too.

Despite their anger and terrible appearance, Tarasque are rather smart animals. They may not exude this intelligence constantly, but they have been shown to learn and recognize. Most notably, they appear to remember people and smells, and create associations with it. While the stories love to paint them as vicious monsters, there are some local folk who claim that they can use the waters of the nearby Tarasque without incident. If one visits these territories enough and do not disturb the beast, it may not perceive them as a threat. If one brings offerings of food, then that is even better! Some fishermen say that they always share their catch with the Tarasque, which allows them to fish their waters in peace. Other villages see them as guardians of the water, preventing evil and outsiders from ruining this resource. Further study has indeed shown that Tarasques can recognize individuals and form these bonds. It seems their territorial nature is not triggered by human-sized beasts, but said creatures in a large boat does push that over the line. Once you get inside a sizeable vessel, you now look like something bigger and more intimidating, which causes them to attack. This is unfortunate, because you can easily see how things go wrong here. Locals live around Tarasque territory in peace, with no incident, but then someone blunders in with a boat or no respect of boundaries and angers the beast. It kills them and suddenly we have calls for slayers to do their job. It doesn't help that water is kind of a big deal for a lot of folk. You can't just leave these places alone, people need to eat, drink and live! As the number of people and dryads go up, so does the expansion towards any unclaimed body of water, which probably has a Tarasque in it, which means problems could arise. Do I blame anyone for this? No, I can't. Okay, well actually, in some scenarios I can. I have heard stories of rich idiots looking to hunt these creatures for the clout, and then they die horribly and suddenly the whole family tree wants revenge. Utter nonsense, all of it. 

These encounters and attacks give the Tarasque a fearsome reputation, when they can actually be pretty reasonable under the right circumstances. A peace can be made, we just have to put in the efforts to do it! But since enough people have died and enough fishing businesses have had their bottom lines ruined by an ornery Tarasque, there are plenty of stories to go around about how horrible and monstrous they are. So much so, that I have heard some takes of this species being that they are these ultimate monstrosities of pure destruction, abominations destined to devour the whole world. Where do people come up with this stuff?! Is this why people want to tie them to dragons? To just hate them more?! It's like a gall in my side! Some folk need to find more productive things to do with their words!

Now some may say, "well don't worry, Chlora, there are a bunch of other stories about Tarasques being nice and reasonable! I am sure that off sets the damage, right?" I appreciate the comforting words, but I don't think they do enough to really sway the public on this. Also, I know what story you all are thinking off. Of the fair maiden who befriended an angry Tarasque that was terrifying a nearby village. Thing was killing and eating fishermen and travelers who boated on the river, and she tried to put a stop to it. Went out there on her lonesome to bring it offerings of food and kindness. Took a while, but she eventually developed a bond with it. Legend says they were such a close pair that she actually led it into town to show the people how peaceful it had now become. The townsfolk responded to this by stoning and spearing the creature to death. When it died without fighting back, the folk wept over the tragedy and their hearts changed that day. Folks point to this tale to show how people can be swayed, and that eventually the fearful folk will learn the true nature of this beast. I look to this tale and think it would be a more heartwarming story if they changed their minds before they beat the poor thing to death.  

Chlora Myron

Dryad Natural Historian

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More dragons! Or "dragons," shall we say. Well, here it is "dragons," but I am sure in others it is dragon. You know what I mean!

[thatstatstoyou]

Welcome to my account. This will be a oc rp blog. The character I'll play as is Tatsou Chizaku.

🤓☝️; Erm that's cringe, who cares about some weird OC blog

🐉- Um okay Theo, obviously you do if you wanna ask in the first place. Whenever I think something isn't my thing I .. oh idk... Try and NOT comment on a post with it?

|🐲|

Ints:

Oc or cannon rp blogs!

Mod is under 18+ so please no NSFW (Flirting I do not care)

Dares or pranks are always welcomed

I'll try to respond with drawings of my oc

Your welcome to ask questions or even rp if you like

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Dni:

Any hate of any kind (I will laugh in your face) This is a safe place for everyone

Nothing too creepy or weird please.

No detailed NSFW things please and thank you

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BYI:

I'm pretty straight forward about things

I use the same tone as you use with me. Are you an asshole? I'm an asshole then. Are you sweet to me? I'm sweet back :3

I am TERRIBLE with tone when texting, please either use tone tags or make it obvious about your emotions on the text. TY!!

~`|•BACKSTORY•|`~

Tatsou and her older sister, Raine lived in a small village northern from the location of final selection. Raine lived in a rather poor family as they didn't have much. Her father being a common thief and the mother being a saint. Raine has a sister named Tatsou Chizaku who is 2 years younger. When Raine(7) and Tatsou(5) were younger. Their father taught Raine how to steal food and jewelry. Which caused them to be looked down on. Months after a demon attacked which led to the death of Raine's parents.

Tatsou was then raised by her sister Raine. Raine did most of the stealing foods and stuff for survival while tatsou was either the distraction or off to the side. Once when Raine and tatsou were going to 'borrowing' food, the owner of the shop caught her and was gonna punish her. One night a demon attacked the village causing everyone to panic. Tatsou was separated from Raine and almost was attacked by the demon. Luckily a demon slayer came before it could and blocked Tatsou before killing it off. Tat was so appreciative after the lovely demon slayer brought her back to Raine and ever since then wanted to be a demon slayer.

Tatsou has always been fascinated in Dragons and always went to collect lizards. One day when she was catching a lizard she saw 3 swords on the back of a river where demon slayers were bathing. Tatsou being the angel she was.... Took the swords when they weren't looking and ran off with them to show Raine.

~`|BASIC INFO|`~

Tatsou is a 16 year old, 5'5 Kinoe Ranked demon slayer. Her breathing style is Dragon breathing that she made herself. Like her sister she has very strong bones, mainly in her legs and arms as that's where she mainly trains.

She mainly focuses on agility and wisdom making her battle IQ very high as well as her flexibility, and movements. She fights in a style like The lion dance as well as basic Katana fighting ig?..... Tatsou has amazing spatial awareness meaning it's hard to sneak up to her and she can sense a demon around the area she is in

(like the police man from rainy and a chance of meatballs/j)

Disadvantage; to many demons can over welm her and if she were to work with anyone like Genya and Nezuko she would accidentally almost attack them because she would mentally process they are not on her side before she sees them

Tatsou is a duals welder except the 'chips' on her sword are actually there to cut down trees or collect wood (cause she is broke AF)

Tatsou, instead of having a crow, has a lahore pigeon because despite being amazingly gifted with spatial awareness she gets lost very easily. She went in a circle for 5 days of the 7 days during final selection

Unlike her sister, Tatsou is more loud, aggressive and very straight forward when it comes to things. She isn't afraid to speak her mind about topics no matter who you are.

🐲🐉Fun facts🐉🐲

Tatsou laces her sword with gasoline so she can light it during battle and have her attack hurt more

The flame of her breathing style is purple

Tatsou gets very quiet and shy around genya, most likely will avoid looking at him or will stare from afar for a moment

Tatsous haori was stolen from a dying homeless man

Despite having a tough exterior... She is actually very childish

Tatsou enjoys secretly giving genya crystals she finds on missions.

Tatsous scar on her face is due to a demon night during a battle.

[harpagornis]

Multituberculate Earth: A world without lizards

The basic thesis of this project is to illustrate that groups we take for granted are only with us out of happenstance. Multituberculates instead of placentals and marsupials is a good display of this, but I went one step further. In this timeline, the last lizards died in the PETM, though snakes lived on.

Lizards were actually strongly impacted by the KT event. Many groups, like the famous marine mosasaurs and the weird chewing polyglyphanodonts, simply couldn’t make it anymore than non-avian dinosaurs did, ad those groups that did survive were highly affected. Indeed, in our timeline it took ten million years for lizard diversity to approach anything close to the condition prior to the asteroid impact.

They were also insanely lucky at that. Because at least two other groups of tetrapods encroached into lizard-like niches:

The sphenodonts, the other main group within Lepidosauria, started the Mesozoic great but declined across the Cretaceous, likely victims to the biotic turnovers induced by the spread of flowering plants. However, the Late Cretaceous of South America still held a large diversity of species both within Opisthodontia and the tuatara-line, with one even making it to the Paleocene. There’s also a possible sphenodont from the Paleocene of Morocco, showing that non-tuatara sphenodonts were fairly widespread until relatively recently. Indeed, a recent study shows that they at no point competed directly with squamates, occupying an unique place in the lepidosaur morphospace, so other factors must be at play for their diversity fluctuations.

The allocaudates are a group of amphibians with uncertain affinities (they’re not closely related to frogs and salamanders for one) which in our timeline lived until surpirisingly recently, in the Italian Pleistocene. They are covered with scales and at least some forms had chameleon-like tongues, so they were clearly more functionally similar to lizards than to moren amphibians like salamanders.

In our timeline, we just missed allocaudates before they went extinct (unless they’re hiding in some baraccopoli) and sphenodonts are currently represented only by a single species in New Zealand, the tuatara. They clearly missed a window of opportunity, especially since both groups were more diverse in the Paleocene.

In this timeline, this window is not wasted and both allocaudates and sphenodonts capitalize on small sized ectothermic niches, the latter doing so for the first time. Allocaudates aggressively spread across the north hemisphere while sphenodontians do so across the southern continents, with Afro-Arabia being a “middle ground” since both lineages were present there and then. Lizards cannot bounce back with so many other dry-skinned cold blooded gremlins walking about, and soon they are not an awful enough shape to die out in the PETM; whatever few forms remains will not pass the Grand Coupure.

The Eocene was thus a golden age for both sphenodontians and allocaudates; in the warm rainforest world, they quickly became cosmopolitan either due to land bridges or simply by rafting like most reptiles and amphibians do, though there was still clear faunal provincialism between the hemispheres. Broadly speaking sphenodontians came to occupy niches more associated with “robust” lizards like skinks and acrodonts while allocaudates came into a variety of niches akin to lacertids, geckoes, varanids and chameleons, though both groups have played at ome of the other’s roles particularly on isolated landmasses where the other group’s diversity was lower. Eocene forms could grow to enormous sizes, some sphenodontians occupying large herbivorous niches while some Komodo dragon sized allocaudates inspired terror in the forest floors.

The Grand Coupure brought about several losses, particularly of the Eocene giants, but both groups remain diverse across the planet. For now, the Oligocene retains mostly just small sized survivors, but as it progresses conditions become more suitable for new breeds of dragons…

In spite of all this, one lineage of squamates remains. Snakes were the only squamates to diversify early on the Cenozoic in response to mammalian and bird prey, and as such they remain here, gladly doing what they do best.

[1tsjusty0u]

whats zeldas + link's + the champions' opinions on animals

OK! link and urbosa are huge cat fans. if link saw a cat he would pet it no matter the consequences (unless its someones pet and they state to not pet it). he is a cat man at heart. he also likes dogs but hes more afraid of them due to being Big and also going up to him fast and licking him. urbosa would like dogs more probably, both more than cats and against link. theyre just Neat. zelda isnt really afraid of cats but she just doesnt usually approach them, she likes dogs but honestly she wouldnt really want a pet i think. unless it was like. a fish or a guinea pig. she also would leave dogs alone unless they go up to her. but shes mostly neutral on them Unless its for studying. oh she’d make herself a robot animal honestly. just like as an assistant. i feel like a dog would be too obvious for that? but maybe something like an owl/bird/something she’d have as like. a sixth divine beast almost (though its not for divine/calamity purposes). also she probably wouldnt really enjoy the work that comes from taking care of a cat/dog so. yeag. link may get one but would most likely just visit strays than fully adopt one. plus he cant really look after a pet. urbosa wouldnt have many problems though. mipha and revali arent really the biggest.. fur fans? like i think cat/dog fur would feel weird on miphas scales and on revalis feathers. itd probably be more troublesome for mipha than revali though. so mipha would try to pet a cat but feel sad that she cant because it feels Bad. honestly she could be allergic to them, though i need to think about how sever it would be. revali isnt a fan of most animals, Especially dogs (way too heavy for him + need lots of attention that could be used for Training!!) . revali would probably get like. a low maintenance pet like a fish and then vent all his problems to it and would get So Upset when it dies (which augh yeah fair..). i dont know if mipha would have any pets in general (not even aquatic ones). maybe a plant as a substitute honestly. zelda gifts her frogbit or skunk cabbages (though those smell apparently) and she just takes care of that. daruk .. hm. honestly i dont know if im going to make him scared of dogs/cats/animals? like. hes not scared of birds (some of them frequent the mountain for those berry plants i mentioned in the flower post), lizards hes also not scared of (small and he is Bigger.), the butterflies he likes to look at but once again, no fear. but animals not on the mountain such as deer, boars, dogs, cats and foxes and maybe even herons? hes slightly scared of. also bears. he both respects the concept of a bear and greatly fears the powers of a bear. OH YEAH HORSES. daruk would get used to them eventually. and cows. but its kinda like being afraid of bugs except those animals are less dangerous except for bears. also fun fact with the cups and pottery theres actually stone/sculpted flowers in goron city!!! theres one in yunobos house look

other animals!! horses. link loves horses and his horse is the best to him, urbosa isnt really familiar with horses but she respects them, and she got her own horse when traveling not the desert. mipha revali and daruk dont really use horses (mipha might though more using carriages, she’d most likely utilize the rivers). revali doesnt really care about them, and mipha likes them. zelda having horse problems + link liking them probably has her try to avoid them mostly. she doesnt hate them but she does dislike whenever theyre around. otherwise though i think she’d be interested in how gentle/wild type horses work maybe. probably intersect the horse logic into something else. cows theyre all decent fans of, mipha especially because she can point at a water buffalo and go ‘hey i have those where i live :D!!!!!’, and link would just miss the cows at hateno village and pet the stable animals. boars.. i think theyd think theyre neat. theyre probably the most hunted animal when they do hunt, but usually they dont have too much of an opinion despite the ganon connotations. though link specifically would see it as an omen. not of bad luck or good luck but of Something. urbosa might too honestly. bears, range from Lets Not Interact with it to HELL YEAH BEAR :D. revali would actually like bears because he’s seen them in hebra and they pose no threat to him. link has almost never seen a bear in his life so hes both mildly afraid and BEAR :D. urbosa has heard of bear tales in the gerudo highlands and of bokoblins riding them (which they can do), but othwrwise she would probably stay away from them because she doesnt want to deal with a bear. mipha would have a sweet spot for bears but also avoid them. shes seen like. 1. and they are Big. daruk has already been mentioned. zelda would think bears are neat especially because of how few of them there are. crows!!! sign of many things (apparently the number of crows can mean something?), usually universally meaning Death. daruk isnt too off put by them especially because theres some near the lost woods, urbosa doesnt know about the connotation to death so to her its just ‘cool bird’, mipha is vaguely aware of it however shes never really experienced it. revali is Suspicious of crows due to him only seeing them circling satori mountain and Only that mountain, zelda does her best to . not avoid them but be aware of the superstitions. she wouldnt like the association with death, and she wouldnt like crows as a result. link would Also not like crows, less of the death superstition and more of how they were in the lost woods. to him its more like a sign of bad luck, if they guard something its best to just leave it be. it makes me wonder how theyd view the crows at satori mountain. also the in game description notes that theyre feathers are seen as a bad omen and they also steal crops. nothing much more except because of the crop thing i feel like link would slightly fear them. give them a crop whenever he sees them. foxes!!! just little guys :D. revali would complain that the foxes in hebra are better (blue coats instead of orange and all that jazz), but not much of an opinion overall. post calamity i think link would never really hunt foxes. the noises they make are sad and he sees them frequently to the point theyre like. not friends but friends. goats!!! if one tried to headbutt urbosa she'd try to flip it over, so sometimes thats why they have meat to cook. daruk isnt a fan he doesnt like how it charges at him. mipha is cautious and revali doesnt care. zelda likes them! link has no opinion. wolves/coyotes! urbosa views them as mostly a nuisance. everyones usually ok with killing them which is. kind of sad. actually its a bit funny how wolves are in packs in botw, considering the lone wolf saying. herons! food/pretty. mipha likes how they fly, and zelda is curious on why the pink and grey ones stick together sometimes. and also why theyre ON THE ROAD. meese/moose! Big. scary. mostly feared. RHINOCEROS :DD!!!!!!! zelda would Love these things -

link and mipha would be interested in the horn. revali would like it a lot, its a cool animal in His region. urbosa would be interested in them, especially because they were in hotter regions. daruk just sits back and lets everyone else interact with them. pigeons!! camping friends, theyre chill. i think post calamity link would like to think a pigeon or two would be rhoam watching the plateau in his old areas. he doesnt see pigeons in most areas, after all. rainbow pigeons would interest zelda and revali, and revali would collect their feathers either for luck or for decoration (a different color feather meaning something different), and zelda would just be interested in how/Why its colored like that. daruk thinks theyre neat! otherwise cool but meh to everyone else. (also looked at the wiki AND APPARENTLY THERES A FIREPROOF PIGEON…..). snow pigeons dont really mean anything to everyone else, but to revali theyre a symbol of cleverness/survival. if you see one its thought to mean that camping will be fruitful. theyre calls probably mean something, but it varies. ducks!!! link and mipha like them, for mipha theyre hunting partners, and for link they remind him of hateno, to him its like they visit him. daruk would enjoy them, urbosa wouldnt mind them. revali would like them. zelda also wouldnt mind them. island hawkers!!! revalis favorite animal he Loves to fly with those things. they visit medoh too and circle the village sometimes. mipha would like to watch them, urbosa would get annoyed at their shadows, daruk wouldnt mind them and neither would link, and zelda would like their patterning. seagulls!! for link specifically theyre also an omen, he mostly saw them on the beach/the abandoned ship him and aryll found. he doesnt know what the omen is though. otherwise not much to say besides being food stealing Bastards and mipha would absolutely punch one if she saw it. shes heard of seagull tales…. ALSO post calamity he uses them for fish indicators. not much else. SAND SEALS. urbosa loves them dearly and she makes fun of everyone else for not having them. theyre sledding Pros, and zelda finds them fascinating. mipha is also curious about them because shes heard of seals from the sea, so shes interested if theres a connection!! but also the sledding is a new and weird thing for her. to link theyre like horses but not. traveling buddies, but he still misses his horse……… though dont tell his horse this but he actually really does like the sledding thing. its fun. daruk would try to outrace a sand seal i think, and he likes em! revali would probably just leave them be in all honesty, its just not his thing. i think sand seals would be a sign of Winning if that makes sense. cuccos!! link would hit them three times for eggs and would scare everyone half to death. zelda wants to study their hatred/ability to attack. actually i think she’d do that youtuber thing of putting cuccos against lynels. also revali would have mixed feelings. like on one hand they look so stupid but also a mountain is named after them??? why?? but yeah chicken. fish would also have some significance like salmon for revali, sizzlefin trout being traded from the gorons to the zora, hearty bass being miphas pride to hunt, sneaky river snails being really cool to zelda, frozen porgy being a snack for urbosa, and mipha just. liking crabs. not eating them as zoras dont do that usually? but enjoying their presence. also zelda would catch bugs . alsoalso off topic but theres always a bird motif throughout hyrule castle. this is probably due to their symbol and loftwings and such but i think zelda would have Some kind of feelings towards a specific bird, i just dont know which one…. its more like the stone birds being. not an omen but a reminder of where she is. and a bird similar to the stone ones would freak her out i think

[little-bunny-with-purple-stinger]

I just watched Kung Fu Panda 4, and I feel that it was so close to being a really good movie with a satisfying end to the series, but there were just too many little things holding it back, as well as some inconsistencies during the movie that made no sense for why some characters should've been where they were at certain times and it just felt slightly rushed and a touch too compressed, especially near the end of it all. I'm fine with the idea of passing on the title of Dragon Warrior and stuff, but I feel that it could've been handled better. But you best bet I am agreeing with anyone who says that Li and Mr. Ping are a couple and have gone on at least one date where they kept fumbling around, but that's not why I'm here. The Chameleon. Great design. Great power. Brilliant visuals. But not being able to get into any Kung Fu schools because she's too small? Then what's this little green stick bug here for then?! And this fangless snake that everyone kept making fun of? Or the bird built like a twig?! Literally Tigress is the only one who was really strong from the get go and fit the description The Chameleon was saying could be the only ones who could learn Kung Fu. And where was Oogway? Where was he when spirits kept getting yoinked? And shouldn't Kai be, like, not there? Like, I'm pretty sure he got turned into universe dust by Po, unless I remembered something wrong. Tai Lung was cool though, though I feel like his battle scene was a bit underwhelming for who he is. Made into disappointment when I realized that the lizards were still alive at the end of it. Like, Tai Lung doesn't show mercy. He's more than capable and has killed any who stood in the way of his goal. Of course, I am okay where at the end of the movie he accepted Po as being the right choice in the end. AND WHY ARE THE CRIME LORDS THERE?! THIS IMPLIES THAT THEY DIED AT SOME POINT, BUT WHY WOULD THE CHAMELEON BRING THEM BACK FOR THIS?! WHAT MANNER OF KUNG FU WOULD MAKE THAT WORTH IT?! And also, the thieves guild, what are they doing. They don't act like thieves except when showing that they are, in fact, supposed to be thieves. They're just a bunch of psychopaths that live in the sewers with how much they talk about and show how much they enjoy violence. I would've loved to see more interactions and reconciliations between Zhen(I only learned that was her name from the credits) and the pangolin dude(forgot his name). Like, that would've been so nice to see rather than "Hey there, we're going to kill you now" "Oh no, don't do that. Why kill now when you can do that later" "Oh, darn, you make a good point there. I shall leave you alone now and help you even though I want to kill you." Like, come on! The soundtrack was also kinda crazy at times, the last song felt really out of place with what was happening and the montage felt a touch unnecessary, which left a slightly bad taste in my mouth to wrap the movie up with. But for as much as I am complaining about it, it had a really solid concept and idea that was perfect for wrapping the series up. Po passing on the torch to someone else while becoming the new leader for his people, Zhen learning to trust and rely on another person was a beautiful thing to see that I feel was done pretty good. I loved the pangolin's design, and The Chameleon's transformation animations were so fluid and disturbing each time until the ultimate form one that felt kinda weird when you saw it moving and like just a dragon, but the Po form and execution was so scary and well done. And Mr. Ping and Li were a joy to watch bond and talk and bicker like a married couple(which they definitely are). Overall, it was so close to being a great movie with just too many small things bogging it down.

When I tried to talk to my brother about this we spent two hours complaining about the Project Monarch universe and how a lot of stuff that happens in it is dumb and how so many ideas and things are thrown out of the window. And where's Mothra? Where's my girl Mothera? Godzilla in that universe is nature's wrath, and apparently Mothera is supposed to be the nice part of nature or something like that it's been a while since I watched the movies okay, but like, where is she? I know she died or something, but a big part of what makes Mothera Mothera is that she is constantly being reborn, so where the freak is she?! My brother had a lot of other complaints that I forgot already, but I have to agree with him. The Monarch universe, while interesting concepts and other things that it started out with were good, has thrown far too many things out of the second story window and rewritten so many facets of itself and only ever implied, never saying or showing many things, implied so much that you would need a bulletin board to explain everything. And I only just learned tonight that there is an official Monarch series that has so much freaking stuff in it that explains so much that they never really advertised. And who is this angry red monkey playing with bones? I haven't yet seen the new Godzilla vs Kong movie, and I don't plan to, but who is he and why is he there?

AND WHERE IS MOTHERA?!

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. Please let me know your thoughts and feelings in the comments and tags and whatever else I may not know of since I am still new to this land of Tumblair, and have a lovely rest of your day.

[pinkiepiebones]

Dear Zombie! Friends occasionally indulge their friends in questionable diversions, right? Would you please tell me about a wonderful dream I had last night? About him? A happy Alternate Universe, if you will? Your perfectly aware that it's probably a bad idea friend, Robbie

The concept of the multiverse was, at first, confounding. One single universe was a daunting enough thing, an unfathomably enormous expanse containing countless worlds within? And then someone said what if there were more of these? It's nonsensical. It's ridiculous. One is more than plenty, thank you very much.

But then the universe in which you live said, what if.

Now the concept of the multiverse is oddly comforting. In one of maybe two, maybe many, universes, your story is a story. Literally. It's a movie. Actors with whom you are somewhat familiar were in a movie that does not exist where you live. It's confusing, but, still comforting, because people in that universe seem to really like you. Maybe they think you're softer than you really are. You chalk it up to the young actor who played you.

You have a wonderful, bizarre window into this universe in the palm of your hand. You made a friend who may or may not exist in some capacity in your own world. Your friend enjoys writing. The writings feel so real to you, like tiny memories being panned out of some unknowable stream. You wonder what this means. Whatever. It's oddly comforting.

One night your thoughts drift, as they sometimes do, to him. It's understandable. No one just "walks away" from a century-long relationship without an airport's worth of baggage.

You think about multiple universes. Multiple possibilities.

You sleep and dream of sand.

You wake up under a wide rainbow umbrella. You're on a bright and cheery beach towel spread over white sand. The sky and sea are picturesque shades of blue. You sit and listen for a moment- the lazy waves lapping the shore, gulls overhead. You breathe deep- soft salty sea air, faintly citrusy sunscreen. Next to you sits a small cooler. You're wearing a loose shirt and swim shorts, both dry but a little stiff with sea water. You run your hands through your hair, it's longer than you thought. You touch the sand just beyond the shadow of the umbrella. The sun has warmed it nicely and you briefly think of stardust.

Then you hear his voice.

"You awake?"

You're up and walking before you realise it. Further down the beach is a man in black swim trunks on a red beach chair. You know him. You know him. The sun - he's out in the sun, on his back like a lizard. He's in the sun. You're on your knees beside him and he sits up and it is him.

"I-" you stammer. "You-" You swallow the rising apprehension in your throat. "Dracula?"

The man you know sits up and pulls off his red sunglasses and he looks at you with a concern that you barely remember. "Robert," he says gently, "are you okay?" He touches your forehead. "You get too much sun?"

"You're not Dracula," you state. The man chuckles.

"I am, but I changed my last name when I turned eighteen because I was sick of the bullshit and the teasing. I thought you knew that?" He situates his sunglasses on his head and frames your face with both warm hands. "C'mon, back under the umbrella, you get a drink and I'll look up symptoms of sunstroke."

You smile, and laugh.

Under the umbrella you sip at a bottle of water while Dracula- formerly Dracula?- pokes at his phone. His beach chair folded up neatly and is sitting behind the cooler. Nothing feels real. Everything is real.

"Well," formerly Dracula says declaratively, "I'm pretty sure it's not a sunstroke. You're just weird." He leans over and touches his forehead to yours. "I love your weirdness. And you, as a whole." He smiles and kisses you and you hunger for this and he is a human with no fangs and sun-warmed skin, with kind eyes and he loves you without demanding anything in return.

He lies back and you rest against him, head on hairy chest. You can hear his heart beating. It's beautiful music. "I am definitely dreaming," you say softly.

Formerly Dracula strokes your hair.

"You picked a nice day for a dream."

[trashbins-stuff]

if you have a lighter, what color is it?

pepsi box blue or cheetos bag orange?

do you like pasta?

how often are you on tumblr?

are you only doing this because you’re bored?

what blogs do you mostly interact with?

can you swim?

have you had water today?

which do you prefer, cotton candy or funnel cake?

have you ever [insert question]?

bass or drums?

favorite tv commercial?

can we be friends?

do you admire the clouds and color of the sky?

what’s the weirdest thing that’s happened to you?

a netflix series that’s your favorite?

an earliest obsession you remember?

do you play video games?

zombies or vampires?

have you listened to [insert musician/band]?

your first celebrity crush?

do you have a collection of cool rocks?

five words that describe you?

what have you learned about yourself?

can you tie a cherry stem with your tongue?

do you believe in aliens?

books or films?

an unusual song that’s your favorite?

the last thing you ate?

do you have a favorite [insert question]?

have you gotten bit by a dog?

do you write better with a pen or a pencil?

a song that gets stuck in your head?

when you hear “ peace ” what do you think of?

a school subject your good with?

how many alarms do you have set?

do you shop at thrift stores?

what’s the meaning behind your url?

is there wise words you live by?

what’s your favorite [insert question]?

you gotta have a favorite beatles song, what is it?

earphones or a speaker?

what do you remember from your childhood?

do you collect anything?

favorite tea?

a christmas song you secretly like?

book stores or record stores?

how weird were these questions?

what scents do you like?

is there [insert question]?

-i dont rlly use lighters but i do use molotov :] my fav is the green one

-cheetos bag orange

-pastaaaa <33

-first place i go to when open my phone, its my comfort place yk,,,

-mybe,,,

-probably a/im-going-to-hornyjail or pepperpep

-mybe

-yes

-cotton candy

-[insert amswer]

-drum

-the cafe commercial where the man (coffe) and the woman (milk) walk to eachother and blend together. Very bigender xoded

-yes

-yeah

-hmmmmmmmmm too much cant rember

-i dont have netflix

-undertale

-yes

-vampie

-[insert yes or no answer]

-i dont have any celeb crish

-*wink*

-silly loyal power-hungry nostalgic bittersweet

-idk

-mybe probably wont stay long tho

-*ring @salachy * r u an alien :0

-book

-messages from the stars by the rah band, god is calling me back home by king gizzard and the lizard wizard and to my enemies by saint motel

-rice

-[insert answer w fav thing]

-naw B]

-it doesnt matter itll still look likr chicken scratcj :'D

-dumb dumb- mazie

-the fruit

- art mybe

-i woke up whenever so no alarm

-yeah i would

-wouldnt u like to know weather boy? (Fuck around and find out)

-"the entire point of my life is to be silly kind and rlly weird btw"

-[answer]

-strawberry fields forever

-earphone

-yeah :D

-plastic bag and straws

-winter melon tea

-humbug by owl city

-bookstore

-theyre kinda weird

-lavender or those scent that remind me of a memory

-[insert the answer here]

[moviemunchies]

You would be forgiven if you thought “Johnny Depp as a lizard” was an idea you could easily dismiss. And yet…

I remember in the lead-up to Rango’s release that I had absolutely no interest in this film. It looked bizarre, and despite being good in the original Pirates of the Caribbean, Johnny Depp kept making movies where he just… played a whacky Johnny Depp character with nothing else to sell the movie on. This looked like another one of those, only animated so he could now be a lizard.

Then I gave this movie a try in college and, uh, I really liked it? I liked it a surprising amount. That’s dialed back in the years since, but rewatching it, I find that I still enjoy it quite a bit.

The movie goes a bit like this: our unnamed chameleon protagonist is a pet lizard who wishes he could be a sort of movie star, and after being accidentally dropped out of a car on the highway of the Nevada desert, he finds himself in a small desert town of Dirt, populated by other small animals. The lizard decides to reinvent himself: no longer nameless, he is Rango, a hardcore gunslinger who can outshoot anyone, and so the townspeople make him their new sheriff. But in his investigation to find out what happened to the town’s water, Rango finds out that he has to do more than act the part of a hero.

I will admit that in terms of actual Plot, this movie’s pretty by-the-numbers. Our hero goes into a new situation, fakes his way to the top, and eventually has to admit his own failings before showing himself a true hero. Yes, we get our own “Liar Revealed” moment. I don’t think the Plot is going to throw you any curveballs unless you haven’t seen a family film in the last thirty years or so.

But what makes this movie unique is its design. There are a lot of things that bothered me at first glance, especially having watched a ton of Animal Planet as a kid. Rango the chameleon is the same size as the other residents of Dirt, including iguanas, horned toads, owls, Gila monsters, jack rabbits, and tortoises. The only creatures that are noticeably larger are the hawk and Rattlesnake Jake. It’s pretty arbitrary.

Still, it’s not hard (for me, at least) to become fond of the character designs, because they’re so detailed and unique. In an age in which more and more animated films are aiming for a certain, soft and rounded look, seeing an animated movie which looks so… intentionally rough and dusty is a bit of a shock. The makers of the film made a point to have all of the characters have memorable designs, because it was a sendup to Westerns. Often in Westerns you get the idea that side characters each have their own lives outside the narrative that the movie just doesn’t have time to get into. Likewise, Rango’s Dirt is populated by characters who have clearly been through a lot, but we only get hints as to what their lives are like when they’re not on screen. 

There’s also quite a lot to love here if you’re a fan of Westerns. I don’t see that many CGI animated Westerns, so having one that not only copies the setting and character types, but the very feel of a Western with its small town, dirty, used buildings and characters, and gunplay, it’s pretty cool. The scene in which Rango meets the Spirit of the West is also one of my favorite scenes ever–and I’m impressed at how much the voice actor sounds like the guy he’s doing an impression of (to the point that I didn’t realize it wasn’t him until I saw the credits).

I really like this movie, because of how different it feels compared to other animated movies. Not in the basic Plot outline, which is fairly standard family movie stuff, but in its design and feel. In the era when a lot of big films seem so same-y, it’s nice to see something that looks so weird and different.

[sinosauropteryx--prima]

Gay Dinosaurs

Let me interrupt your regularely scheduled paleozoic posts for some gay dinosaurs because it‘s pride month.

Up there you can see a little doodle I did of a Heterodontosaurus holding a pride flag. And yes, that is it‘s real name (although it actually translates to “different-teethed-lizard“; you can see it‘s weird dentation in most paleoart, as it is usually depicted with its mouth wide open). It was a small fella, only about 1.5 m long and maybe 10 kg heavy, most likely herbivorous and lived in the early jurassic, about 200 million years ago.

Heterodontosaurus is of course not the gay dinosaur I want to talk about. For the extinct dinosaurs it is very difficult to tell sexual behavior. There aren‘t really any fossils of dinosaurs that are in the middle of fucking, and even if there were, telling the sex of a fossil is very difficult to borderline impossible.

However, we still have dinosaurs around: The birds. Usually you hear that birds are descendants of dinosaurs. That is true, but it is true in the same way, that dogs are descendants of mammals. They are. But they also are still mammals themselves. It‘s the same for birds. They originated from dinosaurs, but they are still part of the dinosaur lineage.

Those fuzzy little dinosaurs that we still have today are extremely gay. Very famously gay are the Chinstrap Penguins of Central Park Zoo, that raised a chick together, but there are many other gay penguin couples: In San Francisco there is a pair of Magenellic penguins, a King penguin couple in Berlin, African Penguins in the Netherlands, gay Gentoo penguins in Sydney and Valencia and many more. More recently there has been a pair of male vultures in a zoo in Amsterdam that has adopted an orphaned egg and they raised the chick together.

Gay behavior is also not just something that is observed in captivity. On an Island of the coast of California there is a population of seagulls with lots of lesbian couples. More often bird species show male-male-pairings though, like in Black swans or Greylag geese, where up to 20 % of pairs are same sex. Sometimes this also causes major problems for breeding programs of endangered species. In one case for example a female Blue duck was presented with two males to chose a mate from. However, the two males decided to chose each other and are apparently very happy now.

(selection of gay birds: top left: Western gull; top right: Black Swan; bottom left: Chinstrap penguin; bottom right: Griffon vultures)

What do all those gay birds now mean for the non-bird dinosaurs? Well, since fruity behavior is that widespread among birds, it is very likely, that they inherited it from their common ancestor. This means that at least the lineage of small carnivorous dinosaurs from which birds descended most likely also showed gay behavior.

But what about all the other dinosaurs?

I did some digging and managed to find an account of male-male-mating in crocodiles (caimans to be exact) published in 2012 in Herpetological Reviews (Herpetology is the study of reptiles and amphibians). You can read it here and you should, mainly, because the clinical way the author describes these two crocs fucking is cracking me up.

So why is the gay croc important? Well, Crocodiles, birds and the non-bird dinosaurs (also the flying pterosaurs) all belong to the same group, called Archosauria. If today, we can see gay crocs and gay birds, it is very likely that they inherited it from a common ancestor (like all the birds would have inherited it from their common dinosaur ancestor). If birds and crocs inherited it, dinosaurs most likely did too. Therefore, there were gay dinosaurs (which honestly isn‘t surprising at all considering how many gay animals there are today).

So, in conclusion, happy pride month to all the gay dinosaurs!