#which we also watched XD greatest 3 hours of the year so far

[sovamurka]

A week ago my roommate and I watched ‘Puss in Boots: The Last Wish’ in cinema theater and there were, like, 8 or 10 of us in the entire room. There was also a couple (a girl with her bf) sitting one row behind us, and they were laughing just as much as we did. 

Long story short, someone on tiktok told the girl that there is a secret post-credits scene. So, when her bf supported her in waiting for that scene, our curiosity got the best of us and we also waited for it. 

Everyone left the room, now there were just the four of us, patiently waiting, reading every name and snickering occasionally. We waited and waited, the lights were already on but we persisted. 

And when the credits ended, we heard Puss asking ‘Are you still here?’ with screen fading to black and burst out laughing.

That was one of the best watching experiences I’ve ever had. 

[meiloorunsmoothie]

how did you first get into Jeremy Jordan

good question—and one i very recently asked myself when the inevitable "how did i become this person" reflection happened 🫣.

i think there were many different factors (most of them not that good) that caused me to dive into obsessive mode so hard (and so quickly)—and it's definitely a "i see it now, but i couldn't back then" kind of situation. however, i'll spare you from those details XD.

the simple story is that, similar to you, i watched tangled the series and instantly fell in love with varian.

i love him

funnily enough, varian was the reason i started watching the show to begin with (coupled with the fact that i love tangled, and rapunzel, and eugene, and pascal, and max, and- 😆). i actually listened to the tts songs before watching the show 🫣 because my sister had gotten hooked on it years before. however, i only listened to the songs with mandy moore and zachary levi 🫣🫣 (cause i was like "who are these other random people, i want rapunzel and eugene"). then one day i listened to "through it all," in which varian has one line (plus an "eh" which i love now, but couldn't tell was him when i first listened XD)—and i was instantly just like: who's that.

have i listened to this one line on loop? you bet.

so i started watching the show—and loved varian from episode one—so naturally, i decide to look up the voice actor. it was jeremy....surprise. except...i didn't actually become obsessed right then. if anything, i was a little weirded out that this tiny boy was voiced by a 30-something year old man 😂 (but it's voice acting, so i was just like: wow, he did a great job 🤩...i'm going to go resume loving varian).

okay and then he sang. i knew he was good from his one line in "through it all", but wOW. adfasjkjaskfjd, on repeat forever and ever.

yes he was

that's not when i became (jeremy) obsessed either XD.

okay...and then a bunch of life stuff/circumstances kind of collided, and let's just say that i was feeling extremely lonely while also struggling with grief. i think there was about a two week period of this before i started actually bouncing back, and i had just reached the end of s1. now tts was doing a good job with bringing much needed happiness in my life, but...s2 had a very noticeable varian-shaped hole in it 😒.

that's when i turned to jeremy jordan youtube. it started off (the first hour) pretty mild—just some of his disney medleys, or the greatest showman video, or just the ones with millions of views—but it very quickly turned into a full out jeremy jordan youtube spiral™️ XD.

i must put this in your face again

i think in part, i latched on so quickly because jeremy and i are actually very similar people in general. i think at the point of extreme change that i was in at the time, it was just nice to "know" someone who was like me—and it definitely helped that there was easy access to extensive jj content. on a slightly different note, this is absolutely the reasoning behind the fact that if i had a chance to see jeremy live, i would choose one of his concerts over, say, gatsby—i am obsessed with jeremy jordan as jeremy jordan XD (hello akp).

literally me (i grew up in california by the way XD)

anyways, fast forward ~3 months, and i joined tumblr 😆...and we all know what happened after that. honestly, not a bad decision in my mind (at least so far), despite being very anti-social media my whole life. i've gotten to chat and obsessively geek out with so many great people, and i'm just so grateful for that 💕.

i've still only watched s1 of supergirl...and many youtube clips

[daughterofhel]

.

My icon died last night.

The little black and white cat, Auk (or-ick). A silly name from a badly remembered name from my childhood.

He was pretty much deaf; car got him.

I haven’t seen him since I left Texas, as I moved for a year to VA before finally moving to be with my wife in Vento. One of my guy friends family took him in on their ranch.

It was fitting; I did get Auk from a ranch. He was used to it, loved it even. And this was without the competition of an unhealthy amount of breeding stays like the ones I grabbed him and Ivy up from. I could only take two, my friend the same.

Funny. I had originally gone there to see the birth of a colt only to leave with a cat. Return the next day and get one more, a friend for my tiny runt of a thing.

And who should but all demand it be him to leave with me but Auk? The friendliest of cats that I’ve ever had the pleasure to be around. He also thwarted my attempts at having two girl cats. He was insistent to leave with me and you don’t argue when you’re chosen you know?

I won’t detail the tears following or the rough road and chaos that went on, but many double shifts back to back to back endlessly, a medicated clumsy grandmother with rapidly failing health, and complex roommate situations, I just wasn’t able to provide the needed time and care for my cats.

I cried the entire 45 minute drive to my buddys property when he said he could take them in. I had to pull over twice. They also cried the entire time, being afraid of the car, which made it harder. My buddy, He was the same guy who rescued a big pup clearly abandoned some years back. I had helped train him to not jump on people and other stuff. His folks also owned a longhorn ranch, lots and lots of space.

Those cats deserved better and this was a familiar element, now neutered, vaccinated, and with no stray competition and the dog was so careful. But god. I never wanted to say goodbye to my cats. It didn’t matter though, what I wanted; they needed care and time I wasn’t able to keep providing.

So I dropped them off. As expected, Ivy kept close but never got too close to the family. She simply doesn’t trust; I’ve no idea why such a little thing bonded instantly with me and remained quite the fixed cuddle bug. But she had. I felt worse about it with her than Auk if I’m to be honest.

Auk loved attention. Loved fetch. Belly rubs. This cat was a classic dog and a huge whore for attention. XD He essentially made himself at home and lavished any and all attention, to which my buddies mother instantly fell for this fuzzy dorks charms. He has been well cared for.

I know younger me could’ve and should’ve done better when I got these cats. Mind you, I’ve been gone for over 10 years now, so it has been quite some time. I’m doing what I wish I could have done for my cats then with the two rescues we got last year here.

I was young and working so many hours for nearly no profit after stuff was paid, even living at home and with roommates. I couldn’t afford the extra vet fees I needed or the fanciest of foods or any of that. I loved them, and I felt them being with me instead of the half starving state they were in from constantly competing with so many other cats, was still a better option for them. I still was at least able to do some of the important visits for them.

I cleared their fleas and earmites. I never did get rid of Ivys worms, though I desperately tried. I tried so many ways to get this pill into that cat. Even crushed into wet food. Friends helping to wrap and hold her to make her swallow. All the tricks we found, failed. She just. She wouldn’t take it. And I didn’t have the cash to go every single day and time she needed a dose to a pet clinic. I had checked more than once. It was so much money.

Older, better situated now.. I’ve been able to do right by the cats, Nyx and Tivali, that I have now.

We even saved Nyx’s eye. We have a system to give her her seizure medicine every 12 hours. They’re both fully up to date with their shots and are fixed. Ears totally clean. Monthly newly added anti flea tick collars.

The best food we can reasonably find at the local pet shop; their pelts are beautiful, soft, shiny, and they never smell.

We’ve even found a biodegradable corn based litter we can flush which has been the greatest find.

We get semi regular check ups on our girls and they’re doing just fine now. I’m still proud about saving Nyx’s eye. It was a tedious ordeal. 3-4 times a day we had to clean and medicate a cats eye. We got good at it even if she wasn’t fond of it. Thankfully the vitamins they required were like treats. Even the antibiotics from the colds they had from the shelter.

I miss Auk. And Ivy. And I wish I could’ve not only given them the life I’ve given my current cats now, (I’ve constructed basket beds, hammocks, a whole canopy jungle gym and rope bridge to boot for them with my wife!), but I wish I could have been the one to have them in my life still. I know it was not possible. It wouldn’t have been possible.

But I think of them. A lot. And I knew it was inevitable. Auk would’ve been well over 13 or so years by now. A little old but could’ve lived longer yet for sure. My buddy didn’t mention he has gone deaf. Of course he rarely goes home himself; I don’t blame him. Life’s complicated.

I have mourned these two cats multiple times now. So I’m not thrown into tears upon this news, I’ve cried plenty over the years already. But I’m still sad to hear that fuzzy delight has passed on. I won’t ask, but I hope, and believe, the accident was a quick end for such a friendly guy.

I’ll mourn him eventually in full. I know I will. But considering this is the fourth major bad news I’ve gotten in less than a month and most of it a week, I thought to write about it. If only to keep sane.

May I not receive the same news of my grandmother or my sister who both remain in the hospital.

And god. May my mother stop forcing me to recall and talk about our shared trauma under my father and just keep me up to date on my families health. I don’t want to be crushed under this suffocating vice on my neck that makes me hesitate to call and see my family. I know she needs to vent. And god. I try to let her. I do. I try to be kind; she needs it.

But it isn’t the time and place when I’m trying to figure out if my grandmother is dying or getting better. I shouldn’t have to receive that confirmation, be granted a brief video called hello and check in, with the price of an hour long dredge through a past I personally have gone to two different types of therapy through to try and cope with. Which, only to some degree, have helped.

One of the last longer calls we had she all but said she hoped her theories on my father possible molesting me were true, so, you know, that would be one more trauma we had in common. She went on and on, even trying to provide loose evidence to her theory. Troubling sentences I would say in my rare visits. Etc. She just. Wouldn’t. Stop. And that was after an hour of recalling how terrible her life was with my father and the abuse, the screaming, the terror, the hiding, the injuries, all of it. As if I wasn’t left to live my life with this very man she said her three years with ruined her more than all her past shit combined.

She assured me she was a good mother who tried. And honestly. No. But I do believe she tried. But she was already weak emotionally and mentally and my father wrecked what was left. She left me sometimes for a couple days lock in that house when I was in diapers. You don’t forget that shit. I’m still scared of the dark. I can’t reason with myself on it. But being mad about all of it doesn’t change anything and would hurt a woman already broken. Why would I do that.

Still. It bothers me. So fucking much. But she’s such a fragile person in a fragile emotional state with everything else on top. She’s been heavily depressed for many many years and it’s a bunch of other stuff that spirals and honestly, at this point, she’s toxic even to herself. I’ve tried working on it with her but it matters not if she’s not willing to work on it too. I don’t know my mother besides her many traumas. We’ve been separated and estranged for most of my life. Unless I was physically able to actually be there and provide a use.

But that’s par for the course; no one will have you around if you’re unable to provide something for it. My wife’s the first person who genuinely seems to enjoy having me around just because and wants nothing more. I do stuff of course; but with her I am not afraid a slip up could mean everything it taken away and lost. I can forget the dishes once or had a bad mental health day and stay in bed without it having catastrophic consequences. She’s such a wonderful kind woman; I cannot help stressing over how to repay her.

I try and I’ve expressed my distraught on the topic and though she always seems baffled and confused about my insistence that I should be doing far more, that lass doesn’t agree at all. It’s her parents home so I am not able to freely run the house as I would on our own, as I’m able and have in many places, so I’m often less useful with the restrictions. She’s also use to the flow and swing of things and has things half done before it’s being asked.

Our own place will make life smoother and calmer for both of us; most importantly her. I’ve watched this family, sweet, but absolutely tone deaf to how many and often their demands are tossed to her. All the other kids moved out with partners. Hell, the oldest s child basically lives here. Our own hurdle with raising a kid who we don’t have the final say on any single thing. His grandparents are enablers cuz they don’t want to hear any loud noises, no matter what. And that causes strain when the kid can and does get anything and everything as long as he kicks up a fit. And he sure as hell does. There are days it’s so bad my wife’s in tears. And that pisses me off. The kids a good person, but the fact no one will actually parent and draw definite lines and be firm with No’s can also make him horrible too.

I’ve to deal with the chess match that is my father. I often call him my own personal Devil. He kind of is. But one I’m familiar enough with at this point in my life. I know where and when to cut my losses, where to step around, when I need to swallow my pride or the easily seen through lies, and nod my head. If he was all terrible, I could have cut him from my life. But no one ever really is. And I do know I owe it to the man; he has helped tremendously in my life as much as he’s been a big problem of it. I know his biggest fear is to be alone and forgotten. I wouldn’t do that, not even to the devil.

I need some bland news. Not thrilling. Not depressing. Just some ‘hey that happened’ ‘oh cool.’ Kind of news. Just a small reprieve.

Im. Scared. Of what’s next.

I. Know that things are teetering dangerously into a very very tragic terrible story on my mothers end. I know her husbands already super suicidal. My half brothers severely autistic, non verbal, among a few other things and will require his whole life to have someone be there for him. He’s not stupid, and I hate when people treat him as so, but he is absolutely unable to care for himself. He doesn’t have the right motorskills even, though we’ve gone to many different places to try and help him find ways to do actions in his own way that still get the same result. I admire how he’s such a positive little man, generally not just happy, but delighted. I aspire to look at the world like he does. He reminds me to try. I do love that about him.

He is, however, a Big boy, 15 now, and growing. He’s also very strong now. My mother is getting to an age where his, as well call em happy slaps, are really hurting her. He is generally good about slapping your hands and not your back if you provide them. But when he is upset he is a shover; one bad fall could really cause a lot of chaos for my mother with her health. The husband spends most of his time locked in his room.

My half sister is epileptic. They have done tests for years and can’t figure out all her triggers or the whys. They just sometimes stop for a long time then suddenly happen. She’s 16, turning 17 soon. And I don’t even know if she’s going to be, since my mother won’t let me know. And there are large gaps from my sister being on tech due to concerns of what triggered her seizure this time so she’s often removed from electronic devices for a time.

When I had turned 21, my mother and her husband tried to have me sign a paper to become legal guardian of my half siblings, should something happen to them, so the kids didn’t get separated.

At that time, I was still taking care of my fathers mother along with working at a shit job, and had a house full of temporary roommates who I had offered rooms to as a sort of safe house for them. I have a knack for finding people from broken homes, what can I say? With the house my father and I built, we had space, so I used it. I was able to help the girls get out of toxic places, get on their feet, and move on. Not all of them always. But it did generally work out. One has a boyfriend who was growing worse to her on top of getting more and more into hard drugs while also she dealing with an abusive aunt who got worse once her mother died of cancer. So she was stuck with the terrible boyfriend. I had her stay with me as soon as I heard.

Another was complicated, but generally revolved around the alcoholic mother and the many, shady, men in and out of the house. The dangers of that alone were.. problematic without the friend also being suicidal and not taken seriously. I’ve stayed many times with her to just hang out, clean, cook, or even read a book cuz she just wanted to hear someone talking and such. You know? Until eventually I had her move in with me too.

Another’s mothers died of a cancer and dad an alcoholic; not abusive, he just became childlike and super forgetful. To a hurtful degree in his totally dependent state, whenever he was home. Plus their whole little trailer smelled of piss. And her boyfriend (they’re married with kids and happy now) was in jail. He had a bad past but had cleaned up his act quite well, but. Well that’s complicated. We all know that the police don’t squint at details of any issue if the accused has a problematic past.

I had two different girls with trouble at home who were being used by their family to constantly work, clean, and pay for everything.

I had an ex and her girlfriend with problematic homophobic parents who were terrible and semi violent so I had them stay with us so they could be together somewhere safer.

I did not. At all. Have the assured means to also be a parent of ten children with very different needs nor any medical benefits to help out with.

I also knew, that, with how my mothers husband was, if he had some guarantees for his children’s safety, he would likely end his life if he could. He’s been so close so many times. If signed this paper, he would have the last big most important concern that’s kept him from.. I just. I didn’t want him to do it. I selfishly didn’t want to be responsible for my siblings that would take away any bit of time I had for myself away. If anything happened, I would not abandon and forget my siblings. That’s absurd. But my mother implied heavily she wanted to be sure of that. And thus this paper.

I was struggling to find aid for college so I could go to school (never got to, by the way. Minus two classes in total. Aced them both, but it doesn’t matter. Credits in the wind). I was already dealing with my grandmother. The girls I chose to help. My shit job. My fathers temper and his horrible horrible ‘on again off again’ girlfriend. The chaos that alone committed.

I was busy providing a safe space in my home and making sure it stayed that way for the rare times trouble makers made the mistake of stepping up to my door to try and harass my girls.

I often worked 10 days in a row before a day off. Many of those days often had double shifts which were 16 hours. Sometimes I got an hour nap on the double shifts.

I just couldn’t do it.

And now. I remember something that came to mind back then that comes back to mind now. My moms husband adores my grandma. She’s been better to him than his own mother. She’s dying. He’s not taking it well and his mental health has always been pretty low and in the last couple years, already dangerously rock bottom. I’ll admit, same.

His daughter is now in the hospital. My brother is smart but there are some things we can’t really explain for him to get. He understands something is wrong but not sure what and it upsets him. He doesn’t like change and gets super fussy for it. Which can be taxing and hours and days and weeks of it. Grandmas been in the hospital for a couple more or more now. She coded a few days ago but they got her back.

If grandma dies. If something happens to my sister…

God. I don’t see that man sticking around.

And with my mom isolated. A lot of it her doing with her own family but also a good part of it being dumb petty bs of other folks that have no reason to behave like that (a whole drama I don’t have the energy to keep up with..). I just.

I see it as a domino effect of terrible terrible events I don’t want to write.

My mothers side im not very close to. I don’t blame my cousins, we were kids ajd our meetings were brief as they were. But the adults kept their distance with me. No one expected me to survive and decided it was easier to not get attached. To not get involved with me, and by extension, the devil himself, my father. So I never got the chance to know that family. Even when I tried.

So the only family I do have some ties to ajd know, is in a hospital bed, or on my dads side, and they’re dying to. And I get it… that at a certain age in life, many of the people around you start to. It’s just life. Ajd it sucks. And I miss having a best friend. I miss having friends who just seem to like to have me around. Want to have me around.

And I wonder if the friends I thought I made with my roommates were just because I provided something for them. Sure we laughed a lot, we cried over shared traumas, celebrated holidays together so as to not be alone.

But not a one speaks to me now. And hey. That’s also life. But it makes me feel pretty shitty; every where I look in the past, I can’t see any relationship, family, partner, friendship, that ever had me around unless I was providing services they wanted and needed. And I don’t mean the natural give and take.

I’m aware that I’m not the friend folks have around. I’m a fun distraction at best and have been told and reminded as such. I feel like shit cuz my wife’s wonderful and the best person in my life, and yet I still mourn having close friends to hang with. I miss gaming together the most. Or the bullshitting. Sharing food.

I’m not a nice person. I’m working on it. I am. I’ve also, for years, been working on my own personal problems so as to not bring them into even conversations. I don’t know what I am doing wrong but I just.. can’t seem to keep anyone around. And frankly.

I find myself crying about it a lot with no idea what to do.

And. I’m burnt out.

I don’t want to make friends anymore. And yet I still crave it. Which sucks. I can’t stop seeming to want that. And I keep trying. And trying.

I’m trying to accept and be happy with any bit of time I get from the few friends who talk to me. I try to take my chances where I can to hang out (online, as they’re all distance by now), cuz I know it’s a short window and I’ll be lucky to get a next time in the near future.

Online is harder to provide a use, and once the ‘honeymoon phase’ of the friendship winds down, some drop off the map entirely. A few abruptly. And I just. That’s fucked me ho a ton. I can’t even express how many hours I stay sitting. Thinking. Unable to understand what I am not doing or what I am.

It’s a pity party. I know. But it’s fine. I’m still the only one at it and though I’m quite forward even with nerves eating away at me, I still just don’t know how to keep anyone in my life.

It’s taken almost 6 years for me to relax enough to believe my wife will, in fact, stick around.

But at this point in time, I’ve realized, on a note I just keep getting really sad over, that the bits of friendship I’ll get to experience with people, will be brief, snippets, and frankly, only if I am providing something they’re not getting.

I’m essentially the magazine next to the toilet when you have a bad bad stomach bug and your phones dead.

Man’s that’s.. probably my own doing. I know I’m a lot of woe is me in here. And it’s a post talking to me, so I’m indulging in it. I absolutely can’t out loud or in life. I’m working on just.. trying to feel instead of ignoring it. Per my therapists suggestions. So I feel fucking overwhelmed, sad, and alone. Isolated. Heavily.

Ignorance is bliss for real. I wish I wasn’t so aware that I was the friend you go to when all options are down and you’re bored. When you are in a bind and need a safe spot (I don’t mind that one but it does suck that it’s the only time some folks pop back in or up). That if I’m not working then no one even has a small little want to just say hi. I wish I had people who just wanted to say hi because they just.. missed me? I gues?

I wish I knew how to be better as a person and a friend. I thought I was making strides on that. I really had. And yet.

Here I am. Just.

Bitching to the void. Becuase my wife doesn’t need me to add more to her life with her father (finally back from the hospital after surgery) and his health concerned along with everyone else’s and the own sets of ordeals here. I don’t need her to fret over me.

She’s needed distraction and I’ve left her alone for a couple weeks now to her drawing. Probably one of the best things I did do for her was clean up a space for a literal drawing room for her. She’s happier for it. People compliment her art and she rather enjoys the well deserved attention.

I personally would love to have her around more. But I’m having a lot of bad shit days. Weeks at this point. And I’m using my energy to be useful in setting the table or doing the dishes, the cats, playing with the nephew, etc.

All I want to do is sleep.

Frankly. I’m tired of waking up.

But for her. I will.

[thatguythatcoulddraw]

Quarantine Q&A!

Tagged by @primasveraas <3

Are you staying home from work/school?

Yee, the VA Governor closed all schools and recreational businesses for a hot few months, so my junior year is technically done. Online schooling til hopefully just August!

If you're staying home, who's staying with you?

I'm actually hosting one of my close friends, an exchange student from Serbia, for two weeks while her main host fam's under a strict quarantine themselves! Without her here I think I'd be mad by now, I love my parents to death but god, seeing the same ANYONE everyday for weeks on end would drive me crazy!! So while she's here I'm sane, but with the exchange programs constantly changing due to Covid-19, she could be sent home any day :(

Are you a homeboy?

Nope. Don't get me wrong, I love weekends at home and spending time relaxing alone, but I'm an extrovert and get cabin fever suuuper easily, so yeah I'm dying. Send help, please, just one movie night, I beg anyone 😭😭😭😭

Any events you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

Gosh, where to begin. The W&L University Singers and my dad (the conductor)'s home performances of Considering Matthew Shepherd, my SAT's, my AP tests, prom, the Equality Gala, my opportunity to sing for a local restaurant, voice lessons, a friend's soccer game I was gonna cheer him on at, my dance recital, my choir concert, the talent show, SO. MUCH. STUFF, LIFE GOT CANCELLED ALL IN ONE DAY AND YES I AM MOTHER FREAKING SALTY!!!!!!!!

Movies/Shows you've been watching?

New Movies!

What's Eating Gilbert Grape

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Shrek (YES, IK, DONT @ ME XD)

Rewatched!

Knives Out

Jojo Rabbit

Frozen 2

The whole LOTR trilogy + our ultra nerdy 11+ hours of behind the scenes content Dad got cuz we all neeeeeeerdz

To Be Seen!

Parasite

Your Name

New Shows!

Schitt's Creek

Gravity Falls

Rewatched!

Sherlock

Star Wars the Clone Wars

To Be Seen!

Killing Eve (got to see ep 1, def want more!)

Music?

Lots of the same old stuff, happy Dodie songs, og Steven Universe, Six the musical and anything Broadway, anything that's upbeat and not such a downer in these downer times :)

Also lots of lofi, for studying :)))

Books?

New Reads: the Crazy Rich Asian series (1 million outta 10, its SO GOOD), Good Omens finally, Call Me By Your Name, and lots more on my ever growing reading list :)

Rereads: I want to read Red, White, and Royal Blue again, the Virals series (by Brandon and. ) which is legit my favorite book series and the greatest one out there fight me, Crier's War, and Resistance Reborn because I want to forget Rise of Skywalker happened.

My top TBRs: Bonds of Brass (GAY SCIFI/CYPERPUNK FINNPOE I LOVE IT) and The Savior's Champion fiiinally

(All of these lists also have so much AO3 fanfic on each of them but we can't get into that or we'll be here til the virus leaves)

What are you doing for self care?

Video calling friends, volunteering at my local food pantry, staying active online with internet friends while avoiding toxic or anxiety-inducing news. I've been baking a ton and trying lots of fun, weird drinks using coffee and matcha just cuz and I've found so many I'd die for. I've started working out more regularly, I drink far more water than I did during school, I pulled out sixth-grade-me's hidden MASSIVE BOX of Bath and Body Work's hand sanitizers and am slowly going thru those. Overall I'm trying not to loose myself or let myself go right now. It's hard, and my mental health is taking a lot of hits right now, but just finding one thing a day to do, no matter what it is, and doing that thing, makes me feel so, so much better. This whole thing is hard. The world is scary and downright weird right now, in a limbo between fragments of normalcy and emergency. I don't know what's gonna happen, no one does. The best we can do is keep our chins up in the face of it all, keep taking deep breaths when it gets too hard, and keep living another day, even when that seems like the worst thing you could do.

We'll all get through this, together. I know we will.

Humanity is kinda batshit crazy. Our collective single braincell by some diety survived this long.

We can survive now too.

I'm not tagging anyone bc I legit know no mutuals here who'd do this who haven't already, so hey @scifigrl47 I love your work and you are my inspiration so uh... if you wanna, try this?

Mmkk that's enough rambling today, wash ya hands and stay safe out there, mates :)

[rose-of-pollux]

Quiz thing

Tagged by @belphegor1982​

When did you last sing to yourself?

This morning, and it was Queen’s “I Want it All.”

If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?

“What are my finches actually saying about me?”

Rest under the cut--

What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

Getting my master’s degree in biology/my thesis project on finch learning.

What is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?

Traveling in New York City with @ksturf​, seeing Anastasia on Broadway and catching 100 Unowns.

Do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?

Not really.  I want to publish a thing, though.

Do you feel you had a happy childhood?

I think so!

When did you last cry in front of another person?

Ummm... I honestly don’t remember.

Pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them

...Does the person have to be living?  My answer depends on that. XD

Would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?

No, but it’s been my experience that strangers like opening up to me for some reason. *shrug emoji*

When was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?

Back when I was doing my master’s, my procrastination habit had come back to bite me hard, and I had left a first draft of a term paper on crocodilian behavior til the night before it was due.  It was @ksturf​ who got to hear me screeching into the void at 3AM as I got the thing done (time zone differences made it not as bad for her).  That is the last time I ever stayed up that late.

(The kicker to this is that 1. I was one of two people who turned the first draft in on time, and 2. My professor said that it was “Such a wonderful first draft and very clear that I spent so much time and effort on it” that I didn’t need to revise it and would get an A on it.  Lesson learned: it’s easy to bluff your way through a term paper--even at 3AM--if it’s something that genuinely interests you)

What is your opinion on brown eyes?

...I love them.  And I would say that even if I didn’t have them myself--because ^he does.

Pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally

"...I’ve enjoyed a lifetime of adventures around the world...” -- Robert Vaughn.

Honestly, it means so much to me--he lived such a full and fulfilling life, and if I even accomplish a fraction of the things he was able to do, that will be time well-spent.

What would you title the autobiography of your life so far?

The Life and Times of a Scatterbrained Writer

What would you do with one billion dollars?

Keep/save enough to live comfortably (maybe slightly frivolously--gotta have my Nintendo games and fandom merch), make sure my best friend also lives comfortably, some for my family, and give whatever we don’t need to those who do.

Are you a very forgiving person?  Do you like being this way?

Hahahaha... No, but I am very good at hiding it.  Should I be better?  Yeah.  Will I?  *shrugs*  Who knows...

Would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?

Pastel, I guess?

How do you feel about tattoos and piercings?  Explain

Tattoos aren’t for me, nor are piercings other than ears.  And I have such a low pain tolerance that I probably wouldn’t have gotten my ears pierced if my mother hadn’t had it done when I was a toddler (my mother was a traditionally-raised Hindu who had only emigrated to the States from India a few years prior, and toddlers getting their ears pierced is a tradition going back literally thousands of years; getting a nose piercing as a mark of adulthood is also a tradition going back thousands of years, but my response to that was a firm #NOPE, and that was the end of the conversation).

Do you wear a lot of makeup? why/why not?

Nooooooo, I hate it, I hate the way it feels on my face.

Talk about a song/band/musician/lyric that has affected your life in some way

So, Rockapella, Genesis, and Queen are three bands that I’ve known since childhood--in the case of Queen, I didn’t know it was them until I was much older (“We Will Rock You” was my hometown’s unofficial fight song for sporting events, so I’ve heard that song since elementary school--usually coupled with “We are the Champions”), and even then remained a casual fan until I watched Bohemian Rhapsody last year and just went headlong into loving them.  Freddie Mercury was an absolute legend, and finding out that he had ties to India like I did was an absolute thrill.

Rockapella were my first music loves--saw them on the Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego game show, rediscovered them years later, and never left them again.  I’ve conversed with two of the Carmen-era members online, and met two others in person.

Genesis has been my musical fixed point, along with Bryan Adams.  I’ve just constantly been listening to them throughout my life.

The Monkees brought me to tumblr and subsequently led to my meeting people here that I’m still in touch with, even if I’ve drifted away from the fandom.

And Zach Adkins holds a special place for me, as well, seeing him as Dmitry in the Anastasia musical with @ksturf.

List the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel

So, I have seen Rockapella in concert 3 times, the Monkees twice, and a solo Nez concert once.

The Nez concert was in 2013, before the more recent... clouds covered the sun, shall we say?  I had a wonderful time at the time, and many good memories, and I feel awful that things have come to this--especially when a good portion of it seems to not be in Nez’s control at all.  It’s a dang shame, but I’ll cherish the memories I have.

The two Monkees concerts were in 2012 and 2014.  The 2012 “Gazpacho tour” was truly a remarkable thing--honestly, I don’t think anyone saw a tour coming after Davy had passed, and suddenly, here it was--and I remember the night before the official announcement, when Nez had teased us and everyone here was going absolutely bonkers over the possibility, before he broke the news before the official announcement.  And then, the concert itself... there was something magical that night, undoubtedly--Micky having us, the audience, sing Davy’s signature song, “Daydream Believer,” saying that it belonged to us now.  It was so sad and wonderful at the same time.  The 2014 tour had a more upbeat and celebratory feel to it, sort of the promise that the daydream was still alive.

The first two Rockapella concerts were before my Carmen Sandiego Renaissance; they just happened to be performing in my hometown twice, so I went to see them because “Oh, these guys!” (though only two of the guys from the Carmen era were actually still with the band).  I had a great time, but it was nothing like the third time, when I went because I had rediscovered how much they’d meant to me (and drove over an hour in a snowstorm to see them.  Abysmally foolish?  Yes.  Do I regret it?  Absolutely not).  The third time was also when I got to meet the two Carmen-era guys (and the new guys) after the concert, which was... more amazing than I can ever describe.

Who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?

I would have loved to have received a reply to the fan letter I had sent Robert Vaughn just two months before he had passed.  Obviously, I learned after the fact that he probably had been too sick to reply, but a reply I would have wanted would have been... just him knowing that he knew how much I admired him, and how much better he had made the world.

Do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organized/not organized?

Hahahahahaha, no.  I’m the most disorganized person in existence.  Any computer stuff I do on the couch.

What is your night time routine?

Dinner, toss around story ideas, make sure the finches are roosting/turn their light off, eventually sneak into bed as quietly as I can so as not to disturb the finches.

What’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?

How unhealthily I eat some days...

If you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?

Nooooo, I wouldn’t want to...

Pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?

...I don’t do groups well; I’d just pick @ksturf and we’d go back to New York City.  Or maybe Hollywood this time, who knows?  Sightseeing and things--catch some Pokémon, too....

Name three wishes and why you wish for them

I wish:

I had enough money so that I and those I care about could live comfortably (self-explanatory)

That I could understand what birds were saying, and they could understand me (as someone who did a thesis on bird learning and behavior and has been trolled multiple times by multiple birds [including my own], I have personal questions I want answered).

That Robert Vaughn was still here (again... self-explanatory)

What is the best Halloween costume you have ever put together?  If none, make one up

I put together an awesome Carmen Sandiego costume in like... 2011?  Everyone knew exactly who I was.

What’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?

...There are a lot of things I would never do for a million dollars.

What’s your Starbucks order, and who would you trust to order for you, if anyone?

Dragonfruit refresher with lemonade.  @ksturf is the one I trust.

What is the most important thing to you in your life right now?

Well, I just wrapped up my one-year position as a lab tech, so finding where I go from here is pretty much the biggest thing right now...

[dreamingbrownie]

Tagging games part 4

Stole this from @potter-at-the-disco and as sure as heck nobody will ask me all of this bunch but I wanted to answer them all the same, I’m doing them in their entirety now. Tagging @fandom-glazed and @luckymoony (I can’t properly tag you for some reason, http://luckymoony.tumblr.com/) if you guys want to do this. 1. Which Hogwarts house are you? Ravenclaw, proudly so. 2. Who is your favourite professor at Hogwarts? Remus. By far. He’s the kind of teacher that we would need a hundred times over and more in our schools. 3. Would you have an owl, cat, or toad? ohmygod give me an owl to pet and send my letters, I still want to have my much loved black cat Nonny at home back tho 4. Favourite character and why? Ufff, tough one. Albus Dumbledore is turning more and more into my favourite at the time because Fantastic Beasts gives him even more depths, aspects of the Harry Potter books make more sense now and I’ve developed a good many headcanons about him and his feelings over the decades by now. On the other hand, I still adore Luna to pieces because she’s so loving and the special kind of person that I tend to gravitate to in reality. Also, I sure as heck relate to being bullied all your damned school career. Can’t really decide, honestly. 5. Pro or anti Marauders? Okay, this is a direct contradiction to having been bullied for 7 years: I’m a bit conflicted about them. I love the Marauders as a concept of very strong male friendship, coming of age, growing up in war times... Still, I’m well aware how shitty a person James and Sirius had been towards Severus, and man, I was so sorry to see him dangle upside down in 7.2, but it’s that friendship aspect that fascinates me. (And Wolfstar, Remus and Sirius, will forever be my OTP that I consider very much in tune with the canon and you can pry it from my cold dead hands.) Even if I never got the whole enemies to lovers between Lily and James. Until somebody explains to me how that happened, I’ll be a bit sceptic about that. I mean, a guy pestering you for a date who just won’t get the hint to leave you bloody alone already? Meh. 6. Avada Kedavra, Crucio, or Imperio? Man, this is a cruel one. Imperio, I’d say, cause it’s the most “““harmless”““ one. Take this with a huge grain of salt. 7. Favourite book and why? At the moment, Jane Eyre. Read it just before Christmas last year for uni and adored it from start to finish for all its directness, unmasked honesty of the conditions of early victorian times, Jane being the most self-respecting person I have ever encountered in a book and the tender love story between her and Mister Rochester. 8. Who do you think was the best father figure towards Harry? Remus. I still wish he could have grown up under his tender care. 9. Favourite movie and why? Interstellar. No unnecessary love story despite the fact that the setting very much would have allowed one between the main character Cooper and the female young Doctor Brand, for once, secondly, I’ve been in love with realistic space movies for ages and this one is by far the best in my opinion. The relationship between Cooper and his daughter Murphy is so heartbreakingly loving from start to finish, I always, ALWAYS cry during the last half hour and frankly, the director Christopher Nolan is a genius. To finish it all perfectly, the score comes from Hans Zimmer. And if Nolan and Zimmer in combination aren’t reason enough to watch a movie, I don’t know what. ... Ah, wait, you asked about my favourite Harry Potter movie, right? That would be 7.1 for the terrors of war displayed realistically for the first time and the Shell Cottage scenes with Dobby that moved me to tears. Also, riding a majestic dragon will get me every time. 10. Which character do you relate to most, and why? A mixture of Luna and Hermione. People say I’m like the latter one all the time due to my perfectionism in History and Literature (that honestly only developed when I started uni last semester, I was a mixture of okay and shit at school) and, as I said, being bullied makes you like the bullied characters more. But she’s unbroken. I admire that a lot in her. It sure as hell didn’t leave me as untouched... 11. Who was the most evil character? Umbridge. Discussion over. No, seriously, I’m well aware that Voldemort was a fascist, killing people, using Black Magic, yada yada, and Bellatrix was mad and cruel, the Dursleys abused and neglected Harry... but who didn’t hate Umbridge the most? Let’s be entirely honest there. :D 12. Thoughts on Severus Snape? Misunderstood arsehole. His character is fascinating and I loved his redemption ark, but I’d never in a lifetime want him anywhere near children to teach because he was the picture example of How Not To Be A Teacher At All. Being amused by scaring students, a fucking cynic (which stems from his character, yes, but keep that out of the class room please), favouring and mistreating certain students due to their House (or parents, for that matter)... Nope. I’ve had enough of that type in my school time, thank you very much. But as a character, he’s very interesting indeed. If you want to read a Snape that’s just as grumpy, magically capable, dark and dangerous but very much lovable in the end, read Naomi Novik’s Uprooted. Trust me. The wizard the Dragon is Snape 1:1 and it’s just so hilarious how blatant the adaption was done, I loved it. 13. Who was the bravest character in Harry Potter and why? Harry himself, I think. To sacrifice yourself so that others can live is the greatest act of bravery in my opinion. He stood up for others time and time again, somehow survived years of neglect and difficult years in school at the best of times, he would have had every right to throw it all to hell at one point, turn his back on everybody and leave. But he didn’t. 14. Best subject at Hogwarts? Transfiguration and Charms would fascinate me the most, I think, because essentially it’s the core of everyday magic. It fascinates me infinitely what one could do with Magic in Harry Potter. 15. Worst subject at Hogwarts? Potions, by far. I can’t cook, I’d be shite at Potions. xD 16. Who would be your enemy or enemies at Hogwarts? I absolutely agree with Harry that Draco was the worst, although I ship the two to death in a fanon sense and in the movies. I hate bullies and Draco was precisely that. Yes, he was scared, forced to do horrible things and under a lot of pressure by his parents, but he was arrogant and said horrible things from the very beginning until he finally grew up in book 7. You asked for my enemy, not for the worst character, because he’s absolutely not. 17. Who would be your best friend at Hogwarts? I’d probably gravitate towards Luna, Seamus, Hermione... Those are the people I’d like to have as friends. 18. If available, would you use a love potion on someone? Nope. 19. Favourite Weasley? The twins. By far. I love them so much. :D 20. Favourite Death Eater? O.o Uhm, ehrm, Snape? If he counts? Because he’s not murderous and mad and all, you know? 21. What would your boggart be? Either a very big spider, Aragog would make me scream like a child, or my math teacher from 10th grade. Yeah, no. The giant spider. Definetely the spider. 22. What is your patronus? An applemare horse according to Pottermore, personally I’m fine with that, but it wouldn’t be the first animal to come to my mind as a patronus. It’s supposed to represent me as a person, isn’t it? That would be a cat without any doubt. :D 23. Fuck, marry, kill *Insert 3 characters* Fuck Gellert Grindelwald (don’t ask me, honestly), marry Luna, kill Dolores Umbridge a dozen times over. Torturing children is Not Cool. 24. How do you feel about Cursed Child? Meeeeeeh. 25. How do you feel about Fantastic Beasts? Fucking loved it from the start, still hyping it and very much looking forward to the next movies.

[altraes]

Tagged by @avenger-hawk @renamon15 and @koukenkage . Thank you :)

Rules: Answer the 11 questions you were asked, write 11 questions and tag 11 people.

(this is going to be long, sorry)

Questions by avenger-hawk:

1. What’s your favourite book? The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. Siddartha by Hermann Hesse. Lord of the Flies by William Golding. Russian Roulette by Anthony Horowitz. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson. A Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

2. What’s your dream job? Becoming a sustainable and/or preservation architect. Want to be able to make artworks and write preferably fiction (and fanfiction XD) on the side.

3. Favourite and least favourite food? Favorite: Apples. least favorite: bitter pickles

4. What’s the thing you like the most about yourself? These days, nothing really.

5. And what’s the thing you hate the most about yourself? Ah, many things. I’m under-confident and indecisive. I mostly make decisions based on my feelings rather than logic and practicality, which is not smart at all but I can’t help it. I’m reluctant and wary of change. I am slow and absent-minded. Etc etc

6. If you could go back in time what era or moment in time (both general and in your life) would you choose? @renamon15 same. I’d like to go back to my childhood and live life with the mindset I’ve gained till now.

7. If you had the chance to get to know one thing that has been hidden so far, what would that be? (like are aliens real? or conspiracies or gods or whatever lol) All the mysteries that comprise the deep sea. Not helpful for me in any way but I’ve always been intrigued by it and find it surprising how little we know.

8. How many languages do you speak? Is there a language you’d like to know? Four (not completely fluent in speaking two of these). I’d love to learn French, Japanese and Russian.

9. What’s your favourite music genre/artist/artists? These days I only listen to indie music, soft rock, jazzhop, asian-traditional fused with modern. I listen to the occasional song too. And I don’t have particular favorite artists or bands etc, it really depends on the songs/music and my mood.

10. What’s your favourite word? I don’t know ^^’ I don’t really think about this, mostly because it changes with my mood too.

11. What’s your favourite quote? “When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change” by Aang in The Legend of Korra. (there are many others but that’s the first one that came to mind.)

 Questions by renamon15:

1. Is there a song that describes you, or song you can relate to? Stay in the Dark by Lambert. I’m not sure if it describes me or it’s something that I relate to, but I find it soothing.

2. Your first pet? (If you didn’t have a pet, did you wish to have one?) It was a goldfish named Poly, lol. I want to have a sassy/curious cat and a chill af dog.

4. Is there something you liked in the past, but you regret it now? I used to read more in the past, nowadays I don’t read as much, which I regret.

5. Is there something bad/embarrassing that happened to you, but you laugh about it today? Uh, I forgot to lock the door when I was showering and my mom walked in on me ^///^’. THANKFULLY IT WASN’T MY DAD OR ANYONE ELSE. It still makes me cringe to this day. I’m often absent-minded so ^^’

6. One guilty pleasure? I like to stay up very late. I really try not to, but it’s when I’m most productive in terms of writing and drawing.

7.How do you reward yourself after accomplishing something big/important? Any among these things: have ice-cream, watch a movie or anime/TV show, take a walk if it’s a nice day. Start a book (if I have the time).

9. One dream you can’t forget (like one that was really scary or pleasant, or one that for some other reason stayed engraved in your head)? It’s disturbing that I sometimes see nightmares as if I’m watching horror movies. I see people I’ve never seen/met before and places I’ve never been to. I see creatures and events that flit by one scene after the other in quick succession. They’re terrifying and very vivid. I usually wake up screaming and with sleep paralysis. Till now I’ve seen three of such distinctly horrific dreams and have even written them down, but I don’t think I will post them anywhere. (I think I watch too much horror movies lol.)

10. Favorite game from your childhood? Hide and seek :)

11. If you could be possessed by someone, dead or alive, or even fictional, who would you like to be possessed by? No one? I find the idea of possession kind of weird. Also, idk why anyone would want to possess me lol.

 Questions by koukenkage:

1. What did you want to become as a grown up when you were a child? A vet. That changed when I learnt I would have to see sick animals all the time and I realised I wouldn’t be able to handle it ^^’

2. Is there a big dream that you had to give up to achieve your goals? Do you regret it? I don’t think I’ve given up any big dream. Right now I’m doing what I enjoy so I’m satisfied.

3. Is there a book/a movie that you’ve loved but couldn’t read or watch again? Citizen: an American Lyric by Claudia Rankine. I had a love-hate relationship with this book. It’s about racism faced by African Americans in America, and of course, I sympathize. However, the book is too serious and intense - it’s stressful. Of course, I suppose it’s supposed to impart such feelings, but still. The best thing about it, however, is her writing style: it’s one of the most unique I’ve come across - a blend of imagery, script and poetry along with dialogues between various photographs and artworks. It’s really an inspiration. But yes, would never read again, sorz Claudia.

4. If you could be someone else for 24 hours, who would that be? Can I be a happy eight-year-old kid thank you.

5. You can get your dream job in exchange for ten years of your life, do you accept? Nope. Time and youth is precious, I’d rather work and study the ten years to get my dream job. In the ten years lost, I feel like I’d miss out on a lot of things.

6. A meteorite is to destroy the earth in 24h, what do you do for dinner tonight? Be home with my family but they’re across the globe so this question stresses me D:

7. You can revive one human being, no matter how long ago they died, who do you choose? Someone of your family? Siddhārtha Gautama? Homer? Shakespeare? Jesus christ? Be wild (or not). Van Gogh. So that he’d get to see how much his art inspires people now. Poor guy was depressed most of his life and his art career was unsuccessful. I’m sure there are lots of artists/writers/activists etc whose works and deeds became appreciated only posthumously. Let them see that they touched people’s lives.

8. You can make one thing disappear from existence, what do you choose? (It has to be something concrete, not a concept, like the flue is okay, but not the concept of disease.) Mosquitoes lol

9. You wake up in the body of Quasimodo, what is your first thought? If we’re really talking about first thoughts then: I AM IN PARIS FFFF I WANT TO TOUR EVERYWHERE.

10. You are going on an adventure of unknown nature, but you are allowed to choose a fictional character to accompany you, who are you going to choose and why? Shisui. Because he’s intelligent and strong so my potato brain and unathletic body can rely on him ^^’. He’s also wonderfully optimistic and has a good sense of humor so he’d make the journey fun too.

11. You fall deeply in love with someone, then realize that this person has done something horrible that goes against all your principles, and you know that you’ll think of it every time you see them. What do you do? I wouldn’t be able to look at them the same way, but I’d be willing to give them a second chance for redemption (everyone deserves this I think). If even that doesn’t work out, sorry. It would have to end. This is all in theory, of course.

My questions:

1. When you’re most depressed, what do you do/think about to cheer yourself up?

2. What are some things you’ve touched that grant you immediate comfort/happiness? (i know, it’s a weird qt, lel)

3. What is one quality in someone that you’ve found really admirable and why?

4. What is one profession you’d like to practice instead of the one you’re working towards/working in?

5. One wondrous/disturbing/interesting memory or imagery from your childhood that you remember vividly.

6. Early bird or night owl?

7. If you could teleport, where would you choose to go first?

8. One good gesture you did today?

9. One thing you’ve regretted doing in the past and can’t get over it even now?

10. One superpower you’d like to have and why?

11. What’s the last book/movie/show/play etc you indulged in that strongly affected you (as in emotionally or made you reflective)?

Tagging: @avenger-hawk @renamon15 @koukenkage (please, only if you want to ofc) @tsukiko-hibiki @littleunknowncrow @konohagakureship (also if you want to)

and anyone else who’d want to do this :)

[davyrush]

Tag Thingy!

The one who tagged me: The paw-some @youronetruepotatocat​

Those who shall bear the tagged sigil: @giraffealamode​ @fussy-prince​ @furry-gamer17​ @littlejavi​ @psi-daydreamer​ @nekosquidboy​ @thenekopastel​ @fabiolaheartilly​

Disclaimer: No need to do this. Do as you please or if bored XD.

1. Name/Nickname: Name’s David, although no specific names are given outside a few friends from which I get a nick or two; things like kirby guy, mankey and such.

2. Gender: Male

3. Star sign: Butterfly, Star Butterfly~ (In reality, Leo).

4. Height: 1.68cm, 5′5″ for mah american friends.

5. Hogwarts House: Sssssssssslytherin <3.

6. Favorite animal: Foxes, Monkeys and cats.

7. Hours of sleep: About 7 I think; it’s becoming a new standard.

8. Dogs or cats: Cats are the greatest pet to grace our existence, as we came to the world not to be served, but to serve ;P.

9. Number of blankets: *The Count’’s voice* Three, three blankets for a twin bed, ha ha ha~. It’s the thin sheet that serves as a layer between the bed and the warm blanket, the previously mentioned warm blankets, and the thick one used to cover everything. Think of it as the top of a burger bun; fluffy and made to be instagrammed a lot (since I take my game pictures there XP).

10. Dream trip: Considering I somehow became the heir to Scrooge McDuck fortune or something, I guess I would visit France along two or three friends. A trip is nice and all, but having someone to share it with is what makes it really magical X3..

11. Dream job: School counselor, I would love to help the younger generations on their path to become better people and on their academic success. If not, a librarian; I may not read a lot, but my neatness would keep a library in perfect order. Sadly, both of those require a master’s degree and I can only go the distance so far... Teacher assistant shall be the next best thing I suppose, or working at a hospital ^w^.

12. Time: 12:00PM.

13. Birthday: August, the 17th. The day the sun shined upon my humble hometown and made narwhals fly too.

14. Favorite bands: Daft Punk and Crush 40 are the only bands I recall getting more than two CD’s from so… I’m more of a remix / orchestra / solo artist kind of guy.

15. Favorite solo artists: Owl City, Troye Sivan, Toby Fox, String Player Gamer, Pogo, Mary Elizabeth McGlynn; insert others XD.

16. Song stuck in my head: “Big Band! Kirby” (The smooth jazz rendition of Aqua Star from Kirby 64 and Save Point from Super Star are just sooooo good <3.)

17. Last movie I watched: High Speed! -Free! Starting Days- if we count what I see in home, for theater releases please see Black Panther.

18. Last show I watched: Sonic Boom -Season 2- Finally catching up to it! XD

19. When did I create this blog: May 2012, and the people who introduced me to it left it 5+ years ago XD.

20. What do I post/reblog: Personal opinions, aesthetics, gaming favorites, yaoi ships, the nintendos, Game Grumps, Kingdom Hearts, Sonic the Hedgehog, other SEGA IP’s, sh*tposting, NSFW yaoi/shota, occasional shots of IRL me and my gaming addictions, coffees, psychologies... basically, anything that I want to share or express, along with things I hold dear <3. I’ll give it points that most of the NSFW stuff is something I wouldn’t talk to you about IRL, but here’s like the only place I can loosen up a bit XP.

21. Last thing I googled: “Butter Building.” I was looking for good fanart of the famous Kirby level. Did not find much visually speaking, but musically it was a treasure of remixes galore <3.

22. Other blogs: Nope. Everything is in one place only, hence why I post NSFW here too XP.

23. Do I get asks: Mmm, usually when I do ask games only. Once every blue moon I get an ask out of the blue, but hey, if you want to ask me something, feel free. I don’t bite, not even growl XD.

24. Why I chose my url: DavyRush has been an online nickname I have since high school. I wanted consistency on that sense (and also, to not have someone claim the name and people confuse me with them X’D).

25. Following; 832 b-blogs! I’m calling out a purge soon, omg XD.

26. Followers: I’m racking 286! Out of them I probably like now on a more personal level about 20 at most XD. Thanks to all the sempai for noticing me ///w///.

27. Lucky number: 6. No less, no more.

28. Favorite instrument: Piano is probably the only instrument I know of that can cause fear and joy, sadness and happiness. Violins are cool too, but piano, mmm~.

29. What am I wearing: A Kirby Planet Robobot shirt, a blue sweater and brown pants. Either I’m a color palette gone wrong or I am making Van Gogh proud right now XDDDD.

30. Favorite food: Sushi, pastas and chicken. Basically anything with rice, chicken or fish (except mole cause... chocolate and spicy on chicken? I have mixed a few odd things in the past but... c’mon XD).

31. Nationality: 100% Mexican; the only American thing I have is a passport, really XD.

32. Favorite song: Press Garden Act 2. Listen to it with your eyes closed and you’ll see, no, FEEL it <3.

33. Last book read: ... does “The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons/ Oracle of Ages Perfect Edition” manga counts? XD

34. Top 3 fictional universes I’d like to join:

Kingdom Hearts: Traveling through various Disney worlds, living in Daybreak town, trying to unravel the secrets of the universe, fighting heartless and more importantly, a way to be in The Grid without taking a slot on this list. Yeah, I would love to do that, please XD..

Animal Crossing: Literally a tiny paradise, filled with friendly animals and plenty of things to do. Sometimes I still pop the game open just to take a virtual coffee and see the ocean. It really feels like a break from reality, and to live in such a serene world would be a bliss <3.

Any Tales world: A place where magic exists, the world seems ever expanding, and everything ain’t as black and white as in other video games. Sometimes we are forced to fight, sometimes the bad guys have good intentions, but we can always count on the good times, the jokes, looking awesome and drama, drama galore XD.

CONGRATS! on making it to the bottom. If you would like to do this ask yourself, please feel free to do so and don’t feel left out of the tags, please ;w;!

[motivationaljudgement]

The Seoul Trip : The Beginning

Day 1

So,...to begin with, 16 hours on a plane (with a 3 hour layover in Dubai) is not as fun as one might have first thought - there’s only so many travel escalators you can ride before it isn’t fun anymore! However, despite all my preconceived misconceptions about them, in-flight meals really aren’t that bad! And being able to play an endless amount of rounds of Tetris and Connect definitely helps to pass the time. But, needless to say, the minute we began the descent into Incheon airport, any tiredness that had began to pull at our bodies, in response to the 24+ hours of being awake, immediately vanished upon looking out of the window and seeing our home for the next almost 3 weeks: Seoul! There are no words to describe the feeling of seeing the reality of a dream you’d been dreaming for 3+ years. Yet, the second we sat on the KTX to make our way to our airb’n’b, and we began to see the landscape of South Korea fly past us outside, we ended up sitting in near silence in our astonishment that we’d actually just flown half way across the world to temporary live a life that had always seemed so out of reach. Stepping off of the metro and emerging from Hyochang park station onto the street was even more overwhelming.

Now, if you ever find yourself making the dream trip to South Korea, and you find you get anxiety about not knowing where to go, how to get places, how to speak to people, etc, etc... DONT!  ‘Cause let me tell you, we were stood pondering our screenshot of google maps looking like your standard confused foreigners at the exit to the station for all of 3 minutes, before a woman (and her adorable dog) approached us, and asked in English (bless her soul) if we needed help getting somewhere! From there it took us around 10 minutes of walking before we rocked up at our officetel, completely haggard and with our clothes sticking to us where we’d been wearing them for so long. Then, almost immediately, we had to venture to the nearest convenience store to grab water and food, which despite our initial shyness was a walk in the park with how tired we were. And even though we hadn’t even begun to think about the language barrier in those kind of situations, the cashier looked just as done for the day as we were, and therefore purchasing our water and ramyeon went by with a simple ‘kamsamnida’, before we made our way back to our little home away from home, only just making it through the door before collapsing.

Day 2

The Exploring begins! Or rather, Jet-lag got us, and we only managed to leave the house at around 3:30pm xD However, once we were dressed presentably and had woken up enough to deduce that we needed to eat food at least once a day to not starve, we rode down from our 18th floor apartment, and made our way to Samgakji station in the direct of Itaewon, by suggestion of a friend. All I’m going to say; two Caucasian, blonde, foreigners, stand out a little in the residential neighborhood - although, in no-way was it in a bad sense! For anyone wondering what the Seoul metro is like, I’d consider it similar in efficiency to the London tube - it’s definitely a lot cleaner and much less cramped (so far!). We’d already bought our T-money cards the day before (in true koreaboo fashion they have Line(c) friends on them) so buzzing in and out of the metro was/is almost too easy, and when we emerged already completely overwhelmed in Itaewon we couldn’t wait to see what would greet us. Let me tell you now, it was the greatest feeling to see it with my own eyes, and have confirmed that it was everything i’d thought and dreamed it would be.

Although it was raining, the coloured roads and the enthusiastic business promotions shone as brightly as if the sun was shining, and the smells of gochujang, bbq, and pizza made our mouths water with every restaurant we passed. Despite Ju’s enthusiasm to find food immediately, after she put me on chief duty to find a place to eat, we ended up walking round for a while (2 hours!*), taking in the sight of each street and surveying the area; pretty much immersing ourselves in being here, before we ended up deciding to venture into a ‘foreign food store’ on the search for some teabags - which any British person will know, is an essential part of living, especially in the case of Ju, who, fyi, makes the best cup of tea in the world! After grabbing the essentials, it was finally an acceptable time to eat, since we’d arrived at Itaewon between mealtimes, and so we headed towards what looked like a full on ‘foodie street’, and proceeded to do the traditional foreigner thing of heading into the first obviously Korean restaurant we saw. 

For all of you suffering from Wanderlust, but too scared to make the trip to Korea - or even to anywhere that speaks a different language - top tip number 1 would be; a language barrier is only a barrier when you see it as one. Now, I’m not going to say I wasn’t scared shitless upon entering a restaurant in a foreign country for the first time, because lets be honest, I was crapping myself, but all you have to remember is businesses are just glad to have business (it keeps people fed and with roofs over their heads). So, the second I climb the stairs to the 1st floor restaurant and I catch the eye of the waitresses sat chatting in the corner of the empty room, I’m immediately ready to turn back. However, the second they see two people with hunger in their eyes, and who were obviously foreign, they waste no time in gesturing us in and after we greeted one another and asked for a table, they showed us politely in, providing us with water and menus immediately. Given that we were hungry, it didn’t take us long to order a serving of bibimbap and Kimchi stew, and within 10 minutes? it was steaming away in front of us, accompanied by a couple of side dishes and a kind smile. Now, i don’t know about anyone else, but from the first minute i learned about the incredible taste of Korean food, i immediately began experimenting with recipes and ingredients in an attempt to create the same taste back in England...However, none of my culinary escapades had ever prepared me for the taste of genuine Korean kimchi stew. It was the BEST first meal I could have hoped for! Afterwards we had to sit for around 20 minutes just to digest the food - although it also gave us time to take in the view of the aesthetic green roofs and the beautiful decor of Itaewon. Of course, as it was our first meal, we then had to go through the awkwardness of trying to call for the bill, which after looking up the translation so that my faulty memory filled with various Korean phrases didn’t offend anyone, simply involved politely gesturing to a waitress who showed me to the counter, before we were thanking the employees and were on our way. (Top Tip number 2: I’d like to remind anyone who plans on visiting South Korea and gets as overwhelmed as I do, that when you hand over money at the till (or just when you’re handling things in general), get that goddamn spare hand on your forearm! Manners Maketh Man, people!) Other than visiting the convenience store once again to grab some foods for the evening, including the essentials (banana milk, HELLO! O.O), and watching dramas, music shows, and ‘Return of superman’  (*and edit a video) for the rest of the evening to try and scrap jet-lag for good, that’s pretty much all for our journey so far.

 We have so much planned for this journey, but we also want to use it as a chance to experience properly living in the country, so there will be times when it seems like we’re cramming everything into one day, and times when it will appear as though we’ve done absolute nothing, but to be honest, that sounds like the perfect plan to us!  So, for now, I hope you’ve enjoyed this little (jokes) summary of our past 48 hours, and I’ll catch you up with more of our adventure in Seoul in the next blog post! ^^ If you have any questions about anything to do with travelling to Seoul and being here in itself; communication, booking things, culture, experience, ANYTHING, just hit up our ask box, and we’ll be more than glad to give you as much of an answer as we are able! :) 

Ciao! ;)

- Admin Mo x -

*Ju’s notes

[theonceoverthinker]

My Weekend At Once Con (Part 1)

...All I can say is wow. ...Just WOW. I'm sitting at my desk at work, just trying to figure out how the hell I'm supposed to go back to normal after this weekend. I'm equally parts at peace, freaking out, and so tired that I'm ready to crash and burn. And I'll tell you all why. ()()()()()()()()()()()()() About Me ()()()()()()()()()()()()() Before I start, I feel like to really understand my feelings about this con, you need to know a little bit about me first. That said, I'll make it fast because I know that's not what you're here for. 1. I'm the weirdest mix of introvert and extrovert that you can imagine. I want to talk to everyone, but at the same time, I'm so freaked out by it, but at the same time, I'll actually do it and jump in. 2. I'm what I call an omnishipper. If it's not incestual, I ship it at least a little. That said, I don't love all ships equally. I play favorites, and can even rank them per character. For example, I like Swan Queen, but I like Captain Swan and Dragon Queen a lot more. I like Violet Believer, but I like Henriella more. You get the drift. 3. I'm pretty positive about the show, and unless it's coming from a place of love, I hate saltiness, towards the writers, towards the characters, etc. I have likes, dislikes, and concerns of course, but there’s a line that I just don’t care to cross where it stops being fun, 4. I say I'm sorry way too much. 5. I recorded hours and hours of audio and video footage. It is all pretty flawed, but I promise, it's real. 6. Now, I'm going to reference questions, but I'm going to specifically focus on mine, since this is my con experience I'm reporting about. Look, I'm biased. It's human nature, and I'm literally writing this less than 24 hours after getting back.That said, if another question or comment really spoke to me, I'll do my best to include it here. Also, I'm doing my best to quote my questions from what I actually said, using the questions as I originally wrote them as well as my own memories, but I'm not trudging through my footage to get them. 7. Apart from Once, I've never really seen the special guests in other works. I saw Jen's play, The End of Longing back in May, but that was about it. This convention has convinced me to go forward and watch more of their works!

Okay, no more waiting! Here we go!!!

()()()()()()()()()()()()() Thursday ()()()()()()()()()()()()() I drove to the con on Thursday. I took a half day at work to finish packing and wait for my carpool buddy. We'd met on a Facebook page called "Once Upon a Time NJ Con," a Wall Street of sorts for the convention run by two lovely ladies. If you're looking to go next year, I can't stress enough just how good this page was. We arrived that evening for preregistration, and after my own adventures in the hotel down the road, I was all ready to get going. My roommate for the evening and I were on line, and already, there was so much excitement to be had. I met a beautiful young woman with crimson hair and a beautiful Swan Queen necklace who had Steven Universe buttons (A rare crossover of fandoms), and after we talked, I affectionately called her "Buttons" for the entire weekend. I entered the vendors room and took it all in. I immediately scoped out everything that I wanted, promising myself that I wouldn't spend too much money. ...You'll see how that ended up later. Thinking quickly, I immediately bought a Captain Swan shirt. There was a mug that looked like Henry's book that I promised myself I would buy on Sundays, but that was it. Don't get me wrong: I WANTED other stuff. The artwork table looked so nice, but I was sure I'd be selling my life savings for it (Something I was proven wrong about on the car ride home). Also, there was a big model of Emma's bug also available for purchase, but for like $50. It's funny because I was actually about to give my model of the bug (which was about 1/10 of the size of the one available here) to a Tumblr friend who I had grown really close to over the course of six months. Really, there wasn't much to say after that. Once my roommate and I had our fill of the Vendor's Room, we headed back to our room, chilled out, and then went to sleep, eager for the con to truly begin. ()()()()()()()()()()()()() Friday ()()()()()()()()()()()()() I've always been an early bird. That wasn't going to be an exception here. My first event wasn't until noon, but I was up at seven, and out the door by eight-thirty. My roommate, or at this point, ex-roommate, and I parted ways, but promised to meet up during the con. Thankfully, this is one of those stories where that actually happens. She and I at times were each others greatest forces of support and friendship in what was already a really friendly convention. We get there, and bond with a couple of people. Eventually, I ran into my carpool buddy and her friend. We killed time talking, reading books, and examining cosplays. Michael Coleman (Happy) and Chris Gauthier (Smee) passed by the lobby a few times, and I actually said hi to them, one time each. I was totally freaked out, but still, it was fantastic! Eventually, the theatre did open up, I parted ways from my friends, and went to my seat. I gotta say, knowing no one (for the moment, at least), it felt really lonely to be waiting for seatmates. Thankfully, a young teenager who had a GA ticket came by and provided a fun amount of conversation! Creation's house band Samurai Fish, accompanying Michael Coleman and eventually Gil McKinney (Eric) opened up the show. I never expected to like classic rock versions of my favorite Disney songs, but they were a lot of fun. XD Gil McKinney's panel, which I thought would originally set the stage for the rest of them, ended up, while doing it to some extent, being its own separate beast entirely, but in the best way possible. I compare it more to a stand up comedy routine than a proper panel. Gil walked around the room, commenting on guests, guessing kid's ages, losing a $20 bet that he would remember a guest's name, and even Face Timing with one of the guest's friends. I was blown away by how charming he is. There was a bit of a Q&A, but it only took up about the last five minutes of his panel. Fortunately for us con-goers, Gil would show up to a LOT more events and do a full-on Q&A the next day with Lee, Chris, and Michael. After Gil came Chris Gauthier. Let me tell you, I was hyped. I had been preparing questions for NJ con for six months now, but from the second I saw his name on the guest list, I knew what I wanted to ask. Chris' panel was more of a traditional panel with one big twist: Instead of going up to the mic, Michael, dressed as the Evil Queen (Heels included!), was going around with the mic to bring it to guests for their questions. This added a fun level of quirkiness to Chris' panel that I and the other guests really appreciated. Ready for my question? Well, at first, I wasn't. Believe it or not, I was terrified at first. But, I told myself that I wanted this and that I could do it. Michael eventually took a seat in the row in front of me, extended the mic to me, and I started to speak. "The last time Smee and Killian interacted in the present timeline, it was before Smee got his memory back and remembered that Killian sold the Jolly Roger and left his crew to go save Emma. What do you think that Smee and the rest of the crew think of their former captain now? Are they happy for his redemption or are they bitter at him for their abandonment?" Chris' response (To quote the man himself, "A little of both," and was followed by a more thorough explanation of why he thought so) was detailed, charismatic, and spoke of how much thought he puts into his character. By the end of it, I really wanted to see Smee on screen again! After Chris' panel ended, we next went into a Trivia Game. I actually participated in the last set of 30 contestants and made it to the top 15! Not half bad, especially because the question was from "Tallahassee" and Season 2 has always been my weakest season. I actually talked to two of the three winners after the contest, and both were scrambling to use their $200 winnings! XD The panels resumed at three sharp with Michael! Sadly, he was not wearing a costume, but what he lacked in that regard, he more than made up for with a bright and cheeky personality. I actually asked him, while something I never explicitly wrote out, about how he came up with the idea for the "Happy Little" series that he has been putting on for the past few conventions. He explained his reasoning in three parts, but I'll just tell you my favorite: He likes wearing dresses! The final panel of the day was the one and only Raphael Sbarge (Archie). What I like about Raphael is how he answers his questions. I'll demonstrate what I mean by discussing my own. So, my question was "In the Once Upon a Time fandom, shipping to many is as natural as breathing. However, Archie was never brought into a romantic relationship over the course of the series, or at least hasn’t been up to this point. Do you have and ideas of a character who you would have liked for him to chirp off into the sunset with?" Rapahel's response? "Who do you think he should end up with?" Now, it is definitely flustering to be asked a question in response to your own question, but give the man credit, that is brilliant when it come to responses. It does a couple of things. First, it's kind of like having a conversation with him. Raphael gets to react to what you think. Second, it buys him more time to respond, which, for a celebrity being put on the spot, is pretty clever. Now, that was the end of the panels, but not the end of the day, not by far. First came autographs. I'm going to hold all of my thoughts on autographs until the end of this series of posts, but for now, I'll say this: They were LONG. Second came...Dani. So, I've been chatting with a friend on Tumblr for close to half a year now. I always admired her posts, and we actually bonded over convention preparations. And she was coming to Jersey Con for Friday night and all of Saturday! I swear, I was just as excited to meet her as any of the celebrities appearing here. After the autographs, I messaged her to meet me in the lobby, and she responded immediately that she was on her way. And for the first time ever, we met. Readers, it felt like a scene in a movie. As soon as I saw her, I knew her, she knew me, we rushed to each other,...and we hugged. Fiction itself is seldom as beautiful.  We went up to her room, talked about a million and one things, shared stories and pictures, and then... Part three!!! You may have forgotten in all the excitement, but there was a brand new episode of Once Upon a Time!!!! It is incredible watching a show you love with someone who is as big of a fan as you. The episode in and of itself was pretty great! So, the episode ended, and with a million and one thoughts and theories, Dani and I headed down to the final portion of the day: Karaoke! Karaoke was hosted by Michael, Chris, Karen David (Jasmine), Beverly Elliot (Granny), and Gil McKinney. In it, our talented stars sang and danced alongside the lucky people chosen to sing pop, Disney, and rock songs! I had entered for Shut Up and Dance With Me, but sadly I was not selected. That said, the person chosen was quite talented. Some numbers that stuck out to me were "These Boots Were Made for Walking," "Sweet Caroline," "I Want It That Way" (Which my friend performed in), the aforementioned "Shut Up and Dance with Me," and "How Far I'll Go." The energy of the crowd was really something to see. Us Oncers definitely know how to rock a house! I bid Dani adieu and left during the final number because at that point, I was dead tired, and of course, I knew that I'd have to be at my best for everything that was to happen tomorrow... Nice cliffhanger, right? Stay tuned for Part 2!

[these-are-the-first-steps]

I was unaware you live in New York. Would you mind me asking what it's like there? As someone who's only been once and doesn't really know anyone there, it's always been a curiosity of mine. No pressure if you aren't up for talking about it. Hope the transition of your roommate moving on goes smoothly. And I hope you yourself are okay.

Hey anon! Oh man, where to start…..as a transplant, my perspective will be different from a native, who would grow almost blind to the daily negative aspects of this place. (in the past, I have literally been told by natives that I’d ‘learn to just ignore all the homeless people’. I’ve been told that multiple times by multiple people. It doesn’t get any easier, though)The Negatives:

-It’s pretty filthy.-The trains run 24h but what good is that when after midnight it’s a train an hour that goes one stop before suddenly declaring it’s the last stop and everybody has to get off? ughhhhh-The homeless population is out of control. I was told by native new yorkers that this is because of cuts in the past few years to hospitals and rehab/mental health facilities and it shows- most of the homeless are literally out of their minds and it’s incredibly sad. -If someone doesn’t ask you for money on any given day, it’s because you never left your house.-Rats. A city-wide pastime to observe, especially while waiting for the train.-The cops are premadonnas. I’ve never seen such a self-important group of police officers in my life. This also extends to other emergency services personnel as well. I’ve seen police turn on their sirens when someone wasn’t moving fast enough at an intersection for them. I’ve seen fire engines blare their emergency sirens just so they can reach their lunch spot faster. I’ve seen ambulances blare their sirens to leave starbucks faster and no, there was no emergency because they casually, half dressed, piled back in their truck- they just didn’t want traffic in front of them. It is, in a word, ridiculous and an embarrassment. -You regularly hear the phrase “Greatest City on Earth” or some variation thereof and I can’t help but wonder if it’s just one giant sarcastic in-joke to say that. I have been assured, however, that it is not. -They recently jacked up the subway pass prices. Now, from my experience in other countries, the NYC subway system is the cheapest there is, but considering how gross, filthy, smelly, BROKEN, and never EVER on time it is with zero hope of fixing this literally antique toy train system we ride every day, there is no reason to raise the prices. None. -The rent is too damn high.-Food prices are too damn high.-Starbucks is literally the cheapest ice coffee in town barring food truck ice coffees. Even cheaper than Dunkin Donuts. That should speak volumes about the prices around here.-Sirens. All the time. -Other things I probably can’t think of or have blocked out right now. The Positives:

-People are way nicer and helpful than reputed to be. Even on the train, commuters are happy to help you find your way in the repetitive rat maze that is the subway system.-Nearly all the clothing brands you love are here. -SO many cool old brownstones. As someone from the south where the aesthetic is wide houses with beautiful columns out front, I still stare up in wonder at them, especially in ultra fancy neighborhoods where the brownstones are crazy decorative- one near me even has like turret towers on it full of stained glass. Just beautiful.-The Metropolitan Museum of Art is INSANE. They have a whole house that they brought into the museum. They have an entire Ptolemaic temple they brought inside the museum. I still haven’t seen everything in the damn thing and I’m a member. -There are a lot of museums and I still need to see all of them. -You will get in shape from walking so much. NYC is a city with an all-around more fit population due to all the walking which is nice. -The bridges here are pretty cool-There is a cable tram that goes over the east river you can ride with your regular metro card. It only goes to Roosevelt Island but that’s still pretty cool.-Central Park sucks but Prospect Park is 1000% better and more awesome- the only bit of genuine-looking woods in the city I think. Designed by the same guy as Central Park, he considered Prospect Park an improvement of his past design of Central and it certainly is that. -It’s not hard to leave the city if you really want to. I think if you had the cash to spare, you could easily rent a car and go upstate where there are actual woods and nicer things to look at. Or out to Long Island if you don’t want to stray that far- a nice compromise. -Amtrak can take you to any major city in the Northeast including DC without need for a car.-I can do the work I love here. -You are going to know at least one person who does a show somewhere, giving you an excuse to look cool and say at least a couple times that you can’t do X because your friend is doing a show that night. -The people out here are ALWAYS doing something interesting. ALWAYS. -If you are dogged and persistent, you can do exactly what you want to do in life out here. But you MUST be DOGGED AND PERSISTENT. -There is full-blown winter and snow out here, which I love. -I have to mention the people again- I’ve met some cool people out here, ESPECIALLY once I quit my shitty job. Man have the people around me drastically improved in so, so many ways….Aaaaand that’s my list! xD I did not include food in either list. The reason is this: NYC is so over-saturated with food places, between restaurants and food trucks, that the overall quality of food in this city is really low. Like really, really low. Because there are SO many places doing the same thing, no one bothers competing- they just churn out knowing no matter what they’ll generally get business from all the masses of people floating through. Food that isn’t crap costs exponentially more. I can get a box of excellent lebanese food back home for $6 that’ll last me for two days. If I were to get that same quality of food- falafels that don’t fucking suck and taste like cardboard- I’d have to put out $14. So food is a real gray area for me here, because it’s SO hard to find quality food that actually tastes good and that is still cheap. Really, really hard. It’s a constant search. Anyway, hope this was interesting/helpful! Again, this is just from my perspective- others’ perspectives will be different from mine and that’s ok. I’m not claiming at all that anything in my list is gospel. It’s just my observations as someone from a different region of the country and also someone who’s lived overseas for several years/visited other countries and has somewhat set preferences for things. I mean…when you go from living in a country with spotless train stations with impeccable timetables, it’s hard to adjust to the gross russian-roulette that is the MTA, etc. Ok I’m done. x.xPS: Everyone in this city is terrified of raccoons, and as a southerner, I can’t roll my eyes and/or laugh harder. The other day there was an article about a squirrel attacking people in a park and it was city-wide news to watch out for this one uber squirrel. I mean…..it’s really amazing. xD

[peach-cake-slice]

I honestly have many OCs, most part of them might don’t be interesting for most part of you but I guess I’ll talk about one of them anyway xP And for this I’ll use my Yuri on Ice OC, called Max. I made him for a RP with @chubbybloomykitty and @blackcatfishingdreams where all the skaters are judging on a kind of “The Voice” skating version xP And our OCs are competeting on this contest having Yuuri and Viktor as their couchies :) If you want to know more about it send an ask to me or to one of my two friends xP But before I start answering this I’ll talk a little about Max [WARNING: THIS CHARACTHER IS QUEER, IF YOU DON’T SUPPORT IT DON’T SEND ME BULLSHIT TALKING ABOUT HOW BEING QUEER IS WRONG OR ANY “PENIS AND VAGINA” SHIT. THANK YOU? THANK YOU] Max is an 17 years old, AMAB (assigned male at birth) boyflux with a short curly hair (sometimes leave it straight), brown eyes and white skin. He likes to use make up and “girly” clouthes sometimes but usely goes for the most neutral visual they can. You can use whatever pronouns with them (from he to zir) and he won’t feel bad, they just don’t want you to treat them as a cisgender boy xP Ok, I guess it was all I could say before starting (I should really try to draw them -v-’’’) let’s go then <3

1. Their voice

Max’s voice is pretty chill and soft, it’s not so deep but also not so acute but it deppends on their emotions (usually makes a really acute voice when have strong emotions. It’s  unusual from them to make a deep voice, unless they are singing)

2. Their smile

Booooy, he has one of the most beautiful smiles of all my OCs until now. Because of their radiant personality he likes to smile a lot specially close to their friends and loved ones <3 (that doesn’t mean that they can’t be savage or sassy tho (¬ ͜ʖ¬) )

3. Their Greatest Achievement

Welp, that’s a good question... Since we didn’t decided who will win the contest yet I guess their greatest achievement until now was to quit their parents house to pratice their skating and get to be noticed by their idols. It’s something that I didn’t discussed to any of my friends yet but their parents awalys were very queerphobic and never supported their dreams and hobbies. And after their father find out that they had a boyfriend (currently ex bf, but that’s another story...) they reacted very strongly and the only thing that came to Max’s mind was to run away as quick as possible. After this, they made everything they could to be strong and get to an big skating contest despite all prejudice they suffered on the process and show to everyone that queer people (specially nb people) DO exists and can be whatever they want. They never hided their gender identity or their sexuality to anyone since then. So be one of the finalists of a big contest with 2 of their idols was something REALLY important to them.

4. Their insecurities

This is something that Max tries their best to hide from everyone but their past are awalys hunting them. They often gets pretty scared of walking on streets and accidentily meet their parents or their former bf again. Why? Well, since their parents is something obvious let’s just talk about their former bf. Welp, he and Max know each other since they were just children and Max awalys felt something for him. They started dating hided from their parents then ran to live together and help each other with their dreams. He awalys made Max very happy and showed all support in the world with everything Max wanted to do (buy a skirt, learning light make up, change their civil name to their social name, etc...) and Max were very happy thankful for all of this. But then one night, when Max woke up in the middle of night and listened to him talking with someone on the phone about them. When they noticed it, they went to the living room to listen the rest of the conversation he was having and what he heard was “I’m trying what I can to make him realize that this queer thing is bullshit. Even tho *insert Max’s civil name here* seems to want to become a girl he awalys take it back and try to have his maculinity back. Maybe he is just afraid that I broke up with him if he decides to be a girl, or is just confused... I’m trying my best to help him to decide it but he insists on this Non Binary shit”.  Well, short speaking... Max started to cry, slaped his face before he could turn off his phone and ran away one more time. After this all this words kept hunting their mind and sometimes gave him terrible nightmares.

5. Their shortcomings

Max is often very impulsive and don’t think too much before decide something. They never were able to see if they have some depression or anxiety disorder because they never looked for a psychologist or any other specialists to find this out. They are headstrong and don’t give up on one point of view easily (which sometimes is good but sometimes can be really mad).

6. How do they deal with grief.

Skating or simply dancing awalys helped them to deal with anything, specially if this is a happy song, and sometime they just slack off and watch animes or play indie video games <3 (my sweet nerd :’D)

7. How they like to dress

Usually, Max tried to dress as neutral as possible with a large sweatshirt, jeans and sneakers. On special occasions they like to use one of the dress or the skirts their friend usually like to give them <3

8. What they like to eat

*inhales* Ok, we are talking about what they like to eat or what they CAN eat? xP Max usually goes for vegan food not because they are actually vegan, they are more for vegetarian, but because it’s yummy and it helps them to have a good meal and control their weight at the same time (also they LOVE to cook and have a great fun doing all the types of vegan meal by themselve xP)

9. Their theme

Master of Tides - Lindsey Stirling This song was used on their first presentation for the contest and he played as a strong pirate playing with his enemies <3 And this song is the one that I’m planning to use for their final presentation (just thinking tho). And think both fits as their themes because they fit with their strenghtness and their fragility respectively

10. Their fashion sense

They don’t actually have one (?) they just go with the style they are currently into xP They like the punk style and the goth style but it’s awalys that they use it for themselves.

11. Their family life

Max’s family had a rich life and owned a very important executive business company. Lucky for Max, they never got envolved with skating or any kind of  ice sport but it doesn’t make their fear of ocasionally meeting their parents disappear.

12. Their romanticaly life

Max only date once so far and had small relations with some people (usually guys). Max is kinda afraid of seriously moving on and date again and gets really nervous with the idea of falling in love to someone again But to their sadness (or not  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) they are currently between an amazing bigender person they met on the contest’s cerimonial party, called Gemna, and a boy from his team called Toby.

13. Their embarrassing memory from years ago

Being recorded while performing and singing Steven Universe’s song drunk xP (Specially “Giant Woman” and “Do It for Her”)

14. How they react to burning their tongue with food

Covering their mouth and blow all the heat they can out while sheding some little tears :’)

15. How they react to brainfreeze

Put their hand on their head and curse xD

16. Their dreams

Other than just winning the contest, they want to open a LGBT+ Friendly Dancing School <3

17. Their ambitions

To be an inspiration to all queers and see they saying that they changed their life somehow by giving them the hope that they can fight against all their prejudice and be the heck they want to be and do the heck they want to do

18. How they sleep

19. Their reaction to betrayal

Boy, Max can forgive many things but betrayal is not one of them. If they ever find out that someone is betraying them, they will make sure that the person will be cient that they know it and then will treat them like they never had existed and like an invisible person.

20. Their reaction to a mystery love letter

Blushing (!?!?!?) and get really nervous about who sent this xD

21. How they react to pain

.... You mean physical pain or mental pain (?) If it’s mental they try to make their best to don’t show it to anyone as long as they can and to not cry because someone can come and see it or call him and get worried if they don’t hang up.

22. What they are like on two hours of sleep

They never sleep just two hours if someone try to wake them up like this their reaction is just to say “ok” and sleep again against their own will xP

23. How they act when they are sick

Max becomes an unseless vegetable when they are sick and make everything pretty slow, speacially on understanding things xP

24. What motivates them

Other then all their objectives and stuff? THIS GODDAMN SONG! 

25. Why I enjoy them

Boy... They are my child...I don’t know how to explain this, I just love them so much and I want to protect them with all my powers ;u;Aaaaaaand that’s it :3 I hope you enjoy them <3 Tell me if you did!

[heather1815]

20 Warrior cats questions

I wasn’t tagged, but i really wanted to do this challenge.

1. How did you get into Warriors?

When i was, maybe around 12 or 13, i was browsing through youtube when i stumble upon the SSS warrior cat animated series. From there i watched other animated projects related to warriors, i had no idea what was going, then i did a little research and discovered the series. And just a year later, i finally got my hands on Into the wild.

2. Favorite Arc?

Well, i haven’t read Omen of the stars yet, neither Dawn of the Clans (But i want to read it soooo badly!) nor Vision of shadows. Which leaves the first three series to choose from. I’m going to go with The prophecies begin, just because how well it is written. Maybe it’s because it’s the first series, but even today the story still holds up. I was so excited to start reading Power of three, but was kind of disappointed by the amount of filler it was put in. And i was really interested in the New prophecy arc at first but after they reached the lake, it kind of dragged from there. So the first series it is.

3. Favorite Book? (excluding mangas, super editions, novellas)

Oh that’s a tough question!

I think it will be a tie between “The darkest hour” and “Long shadows”. The darkest hour was the epic conclusion to the first series, and everything before was building up to this big moment, and it was just so cool to see the four Clans uniting to stand against BloodClan. Though the only nitpick that i have is that it’s kind of lame that the big bad is killed off so easy just so we can get a new “surprise” villain. But Scourge is cool, and i like him. (Yeah, i know he’s overrated, but i still like him as a villain)

“Long shadows” in my opinion was the first true warriors book that i have read since the end of the first series. Don’t get me wrong, not to say everything else was bad before this book, it just didn’t keep my interest from beginning to end. Some conflict stuff happened here and there, but that’s it. So much stuff happens in “Long shadows” and none of it was filler. I remember every single detail that happened in that book. And of course, there is the great fire scene near the end and the cliffhanger ending.

4. Favorite Super Edition, Novella, or Manga?

Okay, i’m going to cheat a little here and pick one for each.

For favorite super edition, my personal favorite is Tallstar’s revenge. I love the way WindClan is portrayed in this book. Tallstar’s point of view is very interesting, especially when you notice the change when he comes back. His relationship with Jake, of course. I haven’t read all of them, i’m currently reading Firestar’s quest and it’s good so far. If i had to rate the super editions i read from my favorite to my least favorite, the order would be: Tallstar’s revenge, Crookedstar’s promise, Firestar’s quest (Again, i’m still reading it, but so far from what i have seen this is where i would rate it. May change the further i progress in the story) Yellowfang’s secret, and finally Bluestar’s prophecy.

My favorite novella is “Mapleshade’s vengeance”. I love how dark it is. How it shows the darker side of warriors, the way Mapleshade went from a loving queen to this tormented, sick and twisted cat with a thirst to kill everyone who wronged her. But the interesting thing for me, is that she isn’t doing this for herself. (For the most part) But for her kits.

And for the manga, well... the only manga i read was “The rise of Scourge”. So i guess this is my favorite! XD

5. Favorite Clan?

ShadowClan. As much as i love the development and culture of WindClan from Tallstar’s revenge, ShadowClan is the one that catches my interest the most. I don’t remember now from where i read it, but when i saw this: “It was often said when the Clans were in the forest, that the cold north wind of the mountains chilled the ShadowClan warriors' hearts.” I thought this was so cool. ShadowClan is often judged to be the “slytherin” of the series. The obvious bad guys/bullies, and i think they deserve more. I haven’t read VoS, but from what i have heard, they are once again in the tyranny of some rogue. Can’t they catch a break for once? I wish this Clan was represented better.

6. Favorite Character?

Only one? Can i mention several? This is warriors after all. There are lots of characters! Fuck it, i’m doing it anyway.

Hollyleaf, love her character arc and i ship her with Fallen Leaves. Jayfeather, his grumpiness is really appealing (Unlike some other cats that i know *Cough cough* Bluestar *Cough cough*) his point of view is very interesting and i was always looking forward to read his parts in the books. Brambleclaw, and i do say “Claw” rather than “Star” because i don’t know how he is as a leader. I liked his struggle to set himself apart from his father, and his relationship with Squirrelflight. Cinderpelt, she deserved better. Yellowfang, grumpy grandmother with sharp tongue (Too bad her character is ruined and tainted further on into the series) Crookedstar, he suffers and goes through so much and yet he still becomes such a great leader. Brokenstar, no i don’t like him in the way that i understand what he went through and his motives are justified. I like him for how cool of a villain he was. (I like villains okay?) He killed kits by training them too hard, he killed his father, he banished his own mother, and ruled over ShadowClan with threats. He was so diabolically evil, how can you not love it? Whitestorm, he was very cool as this wise and respectable warrior. Um... i think that’s it.

7. Least Favorite Character?

Raggedstar, Crowfeather, Rainflower, Leopardstar, and Onestar.

I hate everything about Raggedstar. His character, his relationship with Yellowfang, his actions. He’s so whiny, and really despicable. I don’t care if you have daddy issues or not, you don’t manipulate the one you love just because she decided to become something else.

Crowfeather had so much potential, and i originally liked him in the new prophecies series. But then he became cold and uncaring, and i guess you could make the argument that’s what the Erins were going for after his failed relationship with Leafpool. But he should have been more honorable! Actually be loyal to WindClan because he is loyal, and not because he has to. Taking Nightcloud as a mate just to prove his loyalty is such a mean move, because he essentially used her. And then when the truth comes out about the three, he completely shifts the blame solely to Leafpool, and gets away scotch free! He better get a good redemption in Omen of the stars or else... i’m going to get angry.

Rainflower, Terrible, terrible mother. I hate her so much.

Leopardstar, not much to say in this one. I just don’t think she’s a very good leader, nor did she do much of anything to deserve her position. And she got on my nerves.

Onestar, what’s there to say about this douche cat that hasn’t already been said? He was great as Onewhisker, then he got his nine lives, and i guess one of his gifts was the gift of being an ass because after he became leader his character decided to change and become a complete jerk for no reason. So much for keeping the peace between ThunderClan and WindClan, am i right Tallstar?

8. Most Aesthetically Pleasing Cat?

This is going to be kind of a strange one: Ivypool, even though i don’t know much about her i really like her design. I like tabbies.

9. Favorite Leader?

I like Blackstar. He’s grumpy most of the time, and yeah, he makes some bad decisions. But hey, so does all of the other leaders. I personally would not mind to see a super edition about him. He used to be the deputy for both Brokenstar and Tigerstar, and when the position passed onto him, he stepped up and became a honorable leader. I would like to see this change more closely.

10. Favorite Villain?

As much as i like Brokenstar, i have to go with Mapleshade. She’s the queen of the Dark forest basically. I think she’s still around, if i’m not wrong? But the way she has solely devoted herself to revenge, to even manipulate a kit into basically selling his soul to her at the cost of his loved ones lives, is pretty messed up. Also, can i say that we should have more she-cat villains in the series? We need more she-cat villains in these series. I am so tired of big scarred tabbies going around being evil and stuff. 

11. Favorite Medicine Cat?

Jayfeather. He’s a good medicine cat who’s not afraid to call out on StarClan’s bullshit when he has to. And he always does what is needed of him to fulfill the prophecy.

12. Overrated Character?

Bluestar. At this point, you are probably thinking i hate her guts, aren’t you? I don’t hate Bluestar, i don’t think i even dislike her. But the fandom treats her as if she is the greatest thing ever. If anyone so much as utters that they dislike her they are immediately showered with a storm of hate. How dare anyone dislike Bluestar? She’s fine guys, but she isn’t all that. Calm down. You can love her, of course you can, but we can dislike her too you know.

13. Underrated Character?

Dustpelt. I like his background development. He hated Firestar at first, and i guess he had a thing for Sandstorm. But then he met Ferncloud and discovered a softer side to him, and became a really loyal and devoted warrior.

14. Favorite Minor Character?

Longtail. He started off as a generic bully character, but he got development and managed to redeem himself in the end. Too bad he was put in the elders den. By a rabbit, of all things! (Which btw, why did the Erins send him off to the elders den for? I never got that) Also for honorable mentions goes to both Brackenfur and Runningwind.

15. Favorite Pairing?

I have so many! Fire x Sand - Good development, Squirrel x Bramble - i love me so love/hate relationships, Holly x Fallen -  They helped each other out and have a cute relationship, Willow x Crooked - They are adorable, and of course Tall x Jake - So precious.

16. Least Favorite Pairing?

Crow x Night - He used her, end of story (In fact, might as well put all Crowfeather pairings in here, their all terrible) Spider x Daisy - This was completely out of nowhere, and he was never there for her or their kits. Spotted x Fire - Forced.

17. Favorite Friendship?

Brambleclaw and Stormfur, they were very good buddies during their journey to see Midnight, and i’m glad they kept the friendship even long after.

18. Favorite Moment?

Bluestar’s death. I swear i don’t hate her guys! I just really liked this moment, and thought it was a good conclusion to her character. Her reunion with her kits is very emotional.

19. Most Tragic Death?

It’s a tie between Stonefur and Cinderpelt’s death. Stonefur kept fighting til his last breath in what he believed was right. In front of an audience no less! Cinderpelt, despite everything she went through, was not afraid to lose her life to defend Sorreltail and her kits.

20. Favorite Battle / Fight Scene?

The climax to “Eclipse”. Kind of out of nowhere, especially with the great battle against BloodClan in “The darkest hour”. But this battle is so suspenseful. It’s not kept in the point of view of one single character throughout the whole thing, it keeps switching between Lion, Jay, and Holly as different events keep on happening. It’s Wind and River teaming up to drive out Thunder, leaving them no choice but to team up with Shadow. The four Clans fighting against each other, only to be stopped by the sun being blocked out. It’s a great scene, and i get the chills every time i re-read it.

[terrific-lunacy]

2016 Writing Meme

Writing Self-Evaluation for 2016

So the weirdest thing happened. tumblr notifies me I got tagged by @renderedreversed though I’m not, in fact, tagged in the post. It’s a ghost tag. Maybe I’m the chosen one. So in a sudden bout of compulsive oversharing I’m doing it anyways ;) Also I love all of your stories and I’m just hijacking your post don’t mind me 1. List of works published this year: I do hope you don’t mean completed ones...You’ve come to the wrong place otherwise

Set the Sails (and don’t look     back) - HP

Let’s start the show - HP

6 parts in the ‘First encounters in history’ series - Hamilton

Rumors only grow (into Truth) -  Hamilton

Mercurial Wrath - Hamilton

honourable mention to ‘Blurring Reality’ because I published it in December 2015 so aallllmost 2016 xD. Which would make this list everything I ever published apart from ‘Rebuilt’ lmao.

2. Work you are most proud of (and why): Set the Sails? Idk, it feels different from the others. I’m not good at recognizing or analyzing writing styles but I usually drive the whole plot with conversations. Set the Sails stands out because especially the first chapter has barely any direct speach at all. I guess I’m not so much proud of the story itself, but rather the fact that I managed to deviate from my comfort zone.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why): Depending on the reasons I could literally justify all fics as being the one I’m least proud of. I’m going to say ‘Rumors only grow’ here, because even for a oneshot it doesn’t seem to have much meat to it.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing: How do people have favorite excerpts. really, tell me your secrets, I beg you. Whenever I get Tom and Harry alone in one room I’m happy tbh.

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received: I love them alllll! I can’t stress that fact enough! But alright, alright I can’t dodge all questions. I’m always especially amused when someone starts reading Rebuilt for the first time and leaves short reviews for almost every chapter while they work their way through it. Because at the beginning they’re all like ‘nice’ ‘i like it’ ‘will read more’ or commenting on the plot and then after 40+ chapters they go ‘...there’s no point to any of this, you just like playing with the characters don’t you’. It’s like making a new friend that gets me intuitively.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard: *looks at her last updates sometime in summer* uhhh… It’s been hard finding time to write during the whole year really. I know I could just write half an hour or so every evening but… that’s not how my brain works. I need to know that I have time, like several hours worth of time, even if I don’t need that long. Otherwise nothing comes out and it feels like work.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: everything I write surprises me No but really, I’m often surprised because I don’t map the stories out. So I tend to write myself into a corner and panic over how to get out of it, when suddenly it just happens and I have a new idea. It doesn’t help that I lean towards drawn-out mysteries in my plots. The only reason why they’re uncovered so slowly is because I don’t know the answer. Fake it till you make it. One of the many examples would be the last chapter of Let’s start the show, where Harry is literally already walking towards the manor and I still had no idea how Riddle would get rid of Zabini in some kind of smooth, sophisticated way.

I’m usually not too surprised over how a character turns out to be/act, because I guess I have a pretty solid picture in my head? But I found myself very surprised over how easy or hard a specific character was for me. I would expect characters that I love to come easily and others maybe not so much, but that doesn’t seem to be true at all. Honestly I haven’t figured out which types I can write easily, it seems random so far. I’d really like to write for Hamilton/Burr but as of now Aaron Burr is impossible for me to write. come here and let me love you you little piece of shit

8. How did you grow as a writer this year: I’m always learning more English so that’s a plus that comes automatically with time and practice. I have grown more conscious of my writing. It’s not just me madly writing down whatever I see in my head, I’m actually taking the time to think about what phrases would best describe it.

9. How do you hope to grow next year: I want to finish Rebuilt. Please. For the love of god and all that is holy. Let it end. I guess just write more, generally speaking? I’d like to not have to sit around and wait for inspiration just so I write anything at all. I want to know how to push through even if maybe not all of the conditions have been met perfectly.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): So obviously every review I receive has the effect of cheering me on, but I’m going to cue into the ‘muse’ bit here, because the effect Hamilton had on my life can not be understated. The way words are used in that musical is beyond anything I ever heard. Seriously, everyone who likes to write should listen to it. It’s so…smooth and clever. Also this goes way further than just me loving/obsessing over a thing. I’m suddenly reading biographies and watch documentaries and just... history is so freaking interesting??? Not the facts, but the people that lived it. And biographies are literally just a psychoanalysis of people and their relationships, pieced together from correspondences. And I’m always on the hunt for interesting characters. Also everyone in the 18th/19th century could write so well (if they could read/write at all lmao) oh my gosh they sound like such nerds. Idk, I really feel like I’ve broadened my understanding of the world immensely. Also I listen to rap now???  Enter Hamilton’s creator Lin-Manuel Miranda who’s basically going around reminding everyone that we could die tomorrow and then who will write that story that’s in your head? Maybe get that out beforehand so it exists. And lastly I did not expect the amount of fun and fresh inspiration a new fandom can bring. I’m casually into a lot of things, but for a long time HP has been the only fandom I actively created stuff for.

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: I love writing and reading because it’s not real life, so uuuuhhmmm... I actually do know how to sail, does that count? And I’m basically twisting the science I learn in my studies to write Rebuilt so...

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: Wisdom and me don’t talk much these days. You’re on your own buddy.

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: AHAHAHA is that a trick question?

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read. I’d like to read anyone’s answers tbh. @talriconosco @paper-ramblings @littlemissxanda . If you feel like it!