#will recheck again tmr

[popponn]

“Do you…” Xiao starts, sighing, “…do you really have to call my name for this?”

The two of you sit on one of the branches of the humongous tree where Wangshu Inn has laid its foundation. Xiao makes sure to have one of his hands to guard you from falling. Meanwhile, in a more relaxed manner, your hands remain tangled tidily amongst his tresses, braiding the front part of his hair whilst you sit beside him.

You watch Xiao’s face and gestures for a moment. Upon noticing him still leaning towards you with a slight redness staying on his ears, you beam, “Of course! You are not busy at the moment with your duty, are you, Lord Adeptus?”

Xiao looks like he wants to lie to you for a moment. However, it seems to be impossible—you note with triumphant fondness as that expression switches into one that is mixed with embarrassment and defeat. As childish as it is, you too like that part of him that undoubtedly spoils you a bit too much. It makes you want to spoil him even more.

“I am not,” Xiao admits. Then quickly adding, “Also, you... don’t call me that.”

You hum back, “It’s your title though?”

A few strands of his hair follow the gentle sway of the wind, escaping your fingers for a moment. Easily enough, fortunately, you manage to gather them once again. Through all of this, Xiao still hasn’t met your eyes again.

“It’s odd hearing it from you. Especially, considering we are…” he trails off, the hue of red spreading into his cheeks.

You let him take his time, awaiting the ending of that statement. Yet, as moments pass and he remains silent, you finally supply, “…lovers?”

It is a rhetorical question that rests at the end of your voice and Xiao certainly understands it more than anyone in the whole land of Teyvat. Once again, somehow, his face reddened even more.

But, despite everything, his hand that places itself on the small of your back shifts. Sighing and finally looking at you with a many meaning written in his gaze, Xiao says, “That.”

You let out a small laugh at that. “Then, that means you should do your duty as my lover and let me be lovey-dovey towards you.”

Xiao soon looks like he is chewing on his favorite almond tofu that tastes too sweet and too pleasant. “Will saying ‘no’ to you even do a thing?”

“Want to try?”

“…no. Do as you like.”

notes: blurbed this out quickly because i miss this green guy a lot. the front part of his hair seems very braid-able and he is pretty. then my brain turns off and "xiao pweety". to @doobea thank u for betaing as usual muahhh.

[figula]

current batch of madness blogging day 7 (?)

1. today was better, but i can’t seem to stop myself from checking and rechecking things w/ ben (do you think your cold is getting better? do you definitely? will you go to work tomororw? are you sure? do you still love me? are you having second thoughts about marriage? etc etc etc), which i know is so annoying but if i don’t check i feel so anxious :( i know i have to sit with the anxiety though. im not usually like this - it’s only in times like this where the anxiety is just heightened in every way - altho i know ive been checkier the past month or so now, which isnt great. i just cant stop thinking about whatever the next incident is gonna be - i can’t stop thinking that there is something very wrong w/ ben and im never gonna be able to live in peace again lol. great :) i don’t know what’s more likely: more germs circulating this winter bc of a relaxation of covid rules + a lowered immunity generally, or that there’s just something deeply wrong w/ him LOL :| it always bothers me when he gets a cold bc i get over them in 2-3 days (this cold barely registered as a blip on my radar and if ben hadn’t been obviously ill with a cold i dont think id have even noticed i had it too honestly) and he’s always ill w/ them for like a week or more and i just like dont ... like that ........... not just bc of the triggering factor just like literally it worries me :/ and ben is just like “people react to colds in different ways chammo” but im like :/ but it’s always SO much worse for you that it is for me or ana :/

2. i am doing work tonight which is good. i did my daily site work too + im not too behind on anything atm

3. but this latest incident seems to be on the way out unless ben stays home from work tmr. in which case ill be back to square 0. i seriously need to learn ways to cope bc it is such a fucking strain. like PEOPLE GET ILL. I know this! i CANNOT react this way like 3-4-5 times a year - it’s just not sustainable. but im trying SO fucking hard and i dont think im getting anywhere at all which is just arghhhhh. like im 100% only improving bc the cold is nearly gone? which is just not real improvement at all, it’s just absence of triggers

any advice welcomed tbh........

[drpizzetta]

Me at 2am: what am I going to eat tmr again...?

*rechecks diary*

Breakfast: something small like an apple so I can eat have this thing for lunch.

Me: wait, what if I skipped breakfast so I can have more calories for lunch so I’ll feel full and will eat less for dinner? Ok I’ll do that.

Breakfast: something small like an apple so I can eat have this thing for lunch.

Lunch: bowl of something healthy

*checks diary again*

Me: ⚠️ OMFG I HAVE A DINNER WITH FRIENDS BEEN PUTTING THEM OFF FOR A WHILE, PLNNED THIS A WEEK AGO, CAN’T SAY NO SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT

Lunch: bowl of something healthy

......*scrolls through restaurant’s menu items overestimating calories just in case*

Me: can’t have this, ok i can have that, can’t have this, nope, nope

Panic panic panic panic

Disclaimer: i don’t promote anything, this place is an outlet for the things that go on in my head because I can’t tell anyone else irl.

[misseqaasjourney]

105 ❥ ʟᴇᴠᴇʟ 2

Hello there~ yes, I haven't been able to update as much, I apologize. LMAO as if anyone's reading this lol. Anyways, it's been 104 days since I left Brunei, time flies so fast innit? And I'm now levelled up to 2급 alhamdulillah hahahaha. 2급 classes just started just this week, today's Sunday and the second week of 2급 classes will start tmr~

During my week-long break, I went 구경 around gwang-ju and some other places lmao, funny thing was I 감기에 걸렸어요.. ㅋㅋㅋ my first cold/fever in Koreaaaaa! I felt like dying especially when I had those cough attacks IN THE SUBWAY TRAIN LIKE EVERYONE WAS WATCHING ME INCL THAT HANDSOME OPPAR. Anyways, rn I'm all good except for 콧물이 저금 나요 but other than that, I'm fine, thanks for asking.

Another update is that all the GKS 학생들 will be sitting for TOPIK exam in July. to be specific, July 10th. I believe this was the same date as to when I first sat for my TOPIK I in Brunei. [might wanna recheck again hehe]. I plan to take TOPIK II because it's alang2 cos rn I'm in level 2, and I will study smart for this level 2 [eventhough the lecturers are a bit fast and the classmates are ohmygod im so shy..], I will study hard and smart to understand grammars and memorize vocabs, may Allah swt help me with my studies, aamiin yarrab. I'll also start practicing TOPIK II past papers which I'm scared about but 괜찮을거예요.. 아마.. 할 수 있어.. please keep me in your prayers :')

그럼.. 안녕히계세요.