#with luck i will stay awake long enough to finish it

[thrassisfras]

i almost said emperor constantine was alive for 650 years please send help

[thehistoriccemetery]

would love if you could do prompt 1! especially if tav is being a hard ass and trying to keep pushing themselves hehe :3

Companions with an Exhausted Tav

Three posts in one week?? I’m truly on a roll. (Nah I was sick this week so I was off work for two days.)

Anyway here’s Shadowheart, Lae’zel, Karlach, Minthara, and Jaheira with a very sleepy (and stubborn) reader.

Shadowheart

You usually go to bed quite a bit later than Shadowheart, but luckily she’s never awake to realize just how late you’re staying up.

Until one night you push your luck a little too far. By the time you climb into bed next to her she pops her head up and notices the sun is already starting to rise.

“Love, have you been up all night?” She asks. You decline to answer, and luckily she’s too sleepy to push the matter, for now. You both fall back asleep.

You’re livid when you wake up to the noon sun and find the adventuring party had already left for the day. Without you.

You find Shadowheart polishing her spear, as she decided to stay back today as well.

You approach her, but she doesn’t even look up at you. “Good afternoon sleepyhead.”

“What the hell were you thinking not waking me up this morning?” you say, clearly aggravated.

She props the spear up next to her. “I did” she says, finally looking up at you. “If you’re too tired to get up the first time I wake you, you’re too tired to go adventuring. Now go lay back down. You clearly need a nap.”

You soften, immediately realizing your mistake. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m just…”

“Tired,” she finishes for you. “I know, love. Seriously, go back to bed. You’re so grumpy when you’re tired.”

“I’m not grumpy!” You protest. She morphs her face into an over exaggerated pout, and repeats your words in a mocking tone.

You can’t help yourself, so you laugh. “Whatever. I’ll go back to bed.”

Lae’zel

You wake up in a panic as you’re being roughly dragged across the ground by your ankles.

You flail and struggle against your captors strong hand, but you can’t get loose.

“Tskva! Stop doing that!” Lae’zel shouts. It’s only then you realize who your “captor” really is.

“Lae’zel?” You ask, confused. “What are you doing? Why are you dragging me across the- ow!” You shout as you’re dragged over a rock.

“Seems this is the only way to get you to bed,” she responds, unfazed by your outburst.

She only stops dragging you once you’re in your bed. You immediately sit up and try to escape.

She catches you and pushes you back down. “Lae’zeeel,” you groan exaggeratedly. “I was doing something important.”

“If it is important than you should be able to keep your eyes open while doing it,” she retorts.

Well fuck. She has you there. You have been having trouble focusing for the last couple hours. Maybe it is best if you just go to sleep.

You’re surprised when Lae’zel crawls into your bed beside you. She doesn’t usually stay the night. “What are you doing?” You ask.

“Sleeping. Just like you should be,” she answers. You sigh, thinking of all the crafty ways you could sneak past her once she goes to sleep.

She interrupts your thoughts with a “and if you think you’re sneaking out, you’ve got another thing coming.”

Karlach

You’re passed out over a desk when Karlach gets up for a little midnight snack.

“Oh love,” she sighs. It must be four in the morning. How long have you been up?

You wake up slightly and mumble something indecipherable. You can hardly lift your head up off the desk.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” she whispers, throwing your arms over her shoulders and picking you up.

You unconsciously nuzzle her neck and let out a soft “mmm” at the familiar scent of your lover.

She lays you down on her own bed, trying to keep you upright for long enough to get you out of your armor.

She tries to be quiet, not only to disturb you as little as possible, but also to not wake up the entire camp.

When you’re finally out of your armor, she realizes she can’t find your camp clothes. Eventually, she settles on giving you one of her shirts that’s way too big for you.

You smile and mumble something that may or may not have been a “thank you.”

She finally lays your head against the pillow and you snuggle into the soft sheets and warm shirt.

She crawls cautiously into bed next to you, trying not to wake you up.

She can’t quite tell if you’re awake or not when you climb up on her chest and mumble “mmm warm.”

Minthara

The thing about Minthara is she’s not going to argue with you about taking care of yourself.

You can eat when you’re hungry, sleep when you’re tired, and piss and when you need to piss because you’re an adult and you can take care yourself.

So when she catches you burning the midnight oil for the third night in a row she’s angry. Like more angry than you’d expected.

“Hold on, Minthara,” you say, knowing she about to make you go to bed. “I just need to finish th-“

“No.” You’re interrupted abruptly. “You’re going to bed and I’m not going to catch you out here like this again.”

“Minthara, there’s things that have to done-“

“They can wait till morning,” she interrupts again, trying to stay calm even as you’re testing her patience.

“Just let me-“

“You have to take care of yourself, Tav!” She shouts, finally loosing her temper. “This isn’t an endurance test, this is your life: the one you have chosen to share with me. And I will not have you squander it out here, night after night, robbing yourself of sleep.”

You sigh, taking her hand and pulling yourself to your feet. You don’t even realize how tired you are until you’re swaying trying to keep upright.

She picks you up unexpectedly. You would have never taken Minthara for the type to carry you to bed. She’s never carried you to bed before.

Still, you accept the rare affection and wrap your legs around her waist while your arms and head rest on her shoulder.

She gently lays you down on your bed and pushes your hair off your forehead before giving it a kiss.

She really does love you, and she’s doing her best here. You just gotta take care of yourself, okay?

Jaheira

“Am I going to have to set a bedtime for you like I do the children?” She half teases, surprising you as she approaches your half asleep body.

You groan as if she just woke you from deep sleep. “I’m awake, sorry what time is it.”

Jaheira smirks and bends down so she’s close to your face. “Well past your bedtime,” she teases before giving you a short kiss.

“But I haven’t finished-“

“You’re done,” she interrupts matter of factly. Clearly this isn’t up for debate.

You groan again and mumble “fine,” reaching your arms up for her to carry you to bed.

She laughs, grabbing you by the waist and throwing you over her shoulder. If you’re going to insist on her carrying you, you’re going to deal with her doing it like this.

She’s gentle when she lays you against the bed, crawling in next to you and wrapping her arms around you.

“Wait, so if it’s so late why are you up?” You ask.

She chuckles. “Don’t worry about it,” she answers before kissing you behind the ear and falling asleep.

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Hello hope ur having an amazing day/afternoon/night

So for the "if you weren't alone" how about the Hunting dogs with a GN reader? Take your time and make sure to take care of yourself

If you were not alone

Part III

Characters: Self-Aware! Hunting Dogs

Reader: Adult! GN! Reader

Warning: English is my second language

_______

🐕‍🦺You were tried. Today, you and Hunting Dogs were having one of your traditional camping trips. Thanks to Teruko's and Fukuchi's training, you have become tougher. Still, you were tried and were thankful, when you finally set up a camp.

After dinner, you go to your tents and fall asleep

You were the last one to woke up. A familiar redhead looked inside the tent. Tachihara looked worried.

"[Y/N], you are awake, good... Listen... My dear Hyacinth... You probably should take a look at that..."

You climbed out of the tent and looked around. Your gaze immediately stopped on the familiar Statue of the Seven, standing on an island in the middle of the lake.

You were in Starfell Valley, on a Cider Lake shore.

The rest of the Hunting Dogs were not only up, but already were in their uniforms. A fire was burning and aromas of porridge and tea were coming from a pot and kettle, that were put above the fire.

"[Y/N], does this place look familiar to you?" Teruko passed a bowl with porridge and a cup full of hot tea to you.

You braced yourself. Explanation will take time.

🐕‍🦺 You tried your best to answer questions about Teyvat. About nations and elements. You answered questions about the game. That nothing strange was happening in your game. No insane luck, no new voice lines, no new menus, no new characters (that weren't announced), no reaction to you talking or petting the screen, no strange emails, no gifts. Genshin Impact looked like absolutely normal game.

After the breakfast was done, Hunting Dogs got the most basic information about Teyvat and were as confused as you were about Teyvat being real.

But you can't get answers just staying in one place. After you collect your belongings (with tent, sleeping bags), Hunting Dogs and you start walking. To Mondstadt.

Just to make sure, that you stayed safe, Fukuchi asked you to walk in the middle of the group, while he was walking before you, Tachihara and Teruko were walking on the sides and Jouno and Tetchou were walking behind you.

Your journey has begun.

🐕‍🦺 Mondstadt greet your group with yelling, Knights of Favonius with their weapons out and a mob who wanted blood.

"HERETIC! IMPOSTER WITH A HERD OF SINFUL CULTISTS!" You didn't know, that Kaeya could yell. Or even use 'heretic' negatively. You could see, how Hunting Dogs slowly drew their swords. In a last attempt to explain yourself and try to resolve the conflict, you carefully put your hand on Fukuchi's arm and stepped before him. Dozens of angry eyes stared at you. You cleared your throat.

"I am not an imposter. My friends aren't cultists! We got lost and just wanted to find a way home... AAA!"

"SILENCE YOUR LIES, CREATURE!"

A small stone hit you on a forehead. The hit was painful, but, thankfully, not strong enough to cause serious damage.

But was strong enough to cause damage to the person, who threw the stone.

🐕‍🦺 You left Mondstadt. With Klee as your guide, you were going to the Dragonspine to find Albedo. And Mondstadt was left with beaten up knights, scared civilians and a new baby, who just an hour ago were an adult, who liked threw stones.

Still, no one in Mondstadt realized, that you weren't an imposter. In their eyes, you became an Imposter with a horde of demons under your command.

After you left, Jean reached to Fatui delegation. Maybe, Harbingers could help to capture you.

Meanwhile, you and Hunting Dogs, together with Albedo, finished planning your next move. You would move from nation to nation, searching for Alice. Albedo promise to keep in touch with her, asking her to either stay as long as she can in one nation, or go to you, if you find a safe place somewhere in Teyvat.

Time to move forward.

🐕‍🦺 After Zhongli's and his adeptis attack on you and Hunting Dogs, you decided to stay away from the city.

Still, the situation wasn't as bad as it can be. You had quite a good number of helpers (you, Jouno and Fukuchi had to make sure, that Tetchou won't try to cook for Xiangling as a 'thank you for help'. You didn't want to get on kind girl's bad side), and, while being accused and hunted was terrible, you had your friends with you.

Right before you decided to move to the next nation, your camp was attacked.

By Fatui.

And by Tartaglia, Eleventh Fatui Harbinger.

⚔️ While Teruko and others were protecting you from Fatui solders, Fukuchi was fighting Childe. Fukuchi has to admit, that Childe was a dangerous enemy and a skillful warrior. Fukuchi knew, that he shouldn't underestimate him. And Fukuchi won't underestimate himself either.

Especially, after Childe transformed into a Foul Legacy.

Childe tried to focus on a battle and ignored that tiny quiet voice, that begged him to stop attacking and believe "Impostor's" words. He must destroy the old man and the rest of your horde and capture you.

Childe raised an eyebrow, when the old man picked up a small stone from the ground. Was he desperate enough to start throwing junk? The old man threw the stone. And hot, white pain filled Childe's senses. His left shoulder, where the stone hit him, was burning with pain. The bone shattered, skin was broken. Transformation was cancelled.

Childe, in his human form, was laying on the ground, howling with pain. Behind Fukuchi, the remaining Fatui soldiers finally surrender. They collect their fellow soldiers and Tartaglia and left you alone.

You hopped, that you won't run in other Harbingers.

🐕‍🦺News about Childe's defeat spread through Teyvat. And almost everyone were terrified of your group. Now, instead of 'Sinner' and 'Heretic' you were greeted with 'Begone, Monsters' and 'By the power of Holy Creator, return to the depth of The Abyss you have crawled from!'.

People were now afraid, but, thankfully, Nahida was helping your group. Staying with Aranaras was fun. For some reason, they start adoring Jouno and Fukuchi, and it became a current occurrence, when they were sitting on the ground, discussing something, and Aranaras were climbing all over them.

Unfortunately, harbingers didn't give up yet.

You didn't know about most of the attempts.

You didn't know about Fukuchi fighting with Pierro and winning.

You didn't know about a bird-like mask in Jouno's bag. About Dottore, who was unfortunate enough to ran into Jouno and Arabalika and demand Hunting Dog to give aranara and you to him.

You didn't know about Arlecchino's and Teruko's quarrel that ended in child Arlecchino on a doorstep of House of the Hearth.

You didn't know about Tachihara destroying Sandrone's robot, when she was searching for you.

You didn't know about Tetchou's fight with Capitano. The moment Tetchou got his grip on Capitano's claymore, he got an advantage over the strongest warrior in Teyvat. Because "controlling a blade that was making loops and barrels" wasn't one of Capitano's abilities. Tetchou was victorious.

But four Harbingers still remain. And Cryo Archon was still here.

🐕‍🦺 When you got a letter from Albedo (through Alhaitham) about Alice whereabouts, and Nahida, thanks to her powers, confirmed it, Hunting Dogs and you left Sumeru and start your trip to Snezhnaya through Fontaine's port.

🐕‍🦺 Unfortunately, the delegation was waiting for you in Fontaine. Tsaritsa, healed Childe, Columbina and Pantalone with Fatui troops were waiting for you.

The battle has begun.

Hunting Dogs tried to keep you away from battle. You followed their plan, until you noticed Pantalone, who was aiming a musket at Tetchou, while he was facing another direction.

You acted fast.

You and Pantalone, both gripping one musket, as a small tornado rushed through the battle. Each of you were trying to get the musket solely to yourself. Your fight were good enough destruction, Fatui's troops were jumping away, trying not to get in your and Pantalone's way.

You growl. You hated being in Teyvat. You hated being afraid for Hunting Dogs life. You missed others. You were tired of Fatui's ambush.

You wanted to go home.

The portal opened under your feet.

______

🪢🦀🐁 It's been almost a month since you and Hunting Dogs have disappeared. Everyone was looking for you. While Hunting Dogs would never let anything bad happening to you, there is a chance, that you were separated. And the fact, that there were no trails left, made everyone worried. Fyodor and Dazai weren't sleeping. They were discussing, what to do next. And thinking about the ways to make Katai and Higuichi stop to share their "theories" about your disappearance. Because, if Fyodor heard another "[Y/N] and Hunting Dogs get secretly married and then run away from home to who knows where" from Katai, he will do something drastic to Katai. Same story was with Dazai and Higuichi's "They built a bunker under the forest and hid there from aliens, I know for sure!".

Suddenly, they have heard the loud crash coming from the barn.

🐕‍🦺 Sounds were loud enough to wake everyone up. When everyone got to the barn, they saw a bizarre situation.

You were trying to take away a strange gun from a rich-looking guy, while Hunting Dogs tried to get you away from each other.

🐕‍🦺 Pantalone, startled by the appearance of other people, lose his grip. You immediately pull the musket from his grip and hit Pantalone on the head with the butt of a musket. Pantalone, unconscious, fall on the ground. Only then you realized, that you were back.

🐕‍🦺 It would take time to explain everything to others. One thing for sure. You were very grateful, that you and Hunting Dogs were together. You had a feeling, that the Teyvat journey would be much worse, if you were alone.

______

Tag list: @withered-blossoms , @myluckymoon @cocodrilofeliz @c4xcocoa @vvyeislazzy @whisperingwinters

[aonungyoufuck]

Runaway

Part: Two

Pairing: Ao’nung X Sully Fem!reader

Synopsis : You had Saved Neteyam’s life. Norm and Max Extracting the Bullet but Healing the way Ronal sought to. Being kept at her side to make sure as she put it ‘your recklessness doesn’t kill you’. This leaves you to bond not only with Tsireya a bit more. But Ao’nung as well. Much to Ronal’s dismay

“Breathe how you were taught. It will help ease the pain.” Ronal’s stern voice spoke as she bandaged you up. 

As much as she wanted to hate you and your family for putting not only her people But her children in the dead center of your family’s war. She couldn’t be more thankful that no lives were lost. Not yet if she had a say in it at least. 

“Now lay down Gently. You will stay here till i see you are better”

You nodded. Gulping down a groan as you could barely breathe without any pain. 

“Your Family is allowed to see you. But do not move” Ronal ordered as she stepped outside the Marui that was not far from her own. As your luck would have it. You were the only one severely injured. Which left you lonely but also relieved no one got to see you making faces. 

“My child” Neytiri spoke as she approached you. Gently caressing your face in a form of comfort. 

“Y/n How do you feel?” your father asked you. You barely could move but made an effort to turn to look at him.

“Like death itself”

Small laughter erupted and all you could do was smile. 

“Neteyam, How do you find yourself” you asked. 

“Well sister. Thank you for saving me”

You smiled nodding a bit as you looked up ahead. Your rather not suffer Ronal’s wrath if you move too much. 

“I am to stay here. Sorry i cant be with you all”

“It is alright my child. When our duties do not interfere we will come to talk with you” your mother spoke as you enjoyed her gently grazes on your forehead.

As the oldest daughter you suppose you could enjoy taking some time away from your siblings tho at the expense of some pain “Lo’ak, Kiri, Tuk! Please do not cause more Trouble to Neteyam while i am out of commission”

You didnt need to look to know the offended gasp Lo’ak was sure to wear. “I do not cause trouble”

“Oh Eywa take me now for that is the fattest lie anyone’s ever told” You commented back sarcastically. Making Neteyam laugh and Tuk giggle. 

“But please. Keep yourself safe for i am not there to beat some sense into you guys” you said a yawn escaping your lips as you grew tired after today’s events. 

“Dont Worry. I’ll be there to keep an eye on them” Spider commented. You had almost forgotten that he had joined in again. 

“Great mother have mercy on this clan” Its not that you didn’t trust Spider to keep an eye on them. The only problem was Spider wasn’t one to back down if it looked ‘fun’

“It looks like your tired. Come on now kids lets head out and let your sister rest. Its been a long day already” Jake said as he hurdled the kids out. Your mother stayed, kissing your head as she headed out as well. 

You stayed there. Listening to the waves crash below you and all around you as you sighed. No matter how tired you were. You couldn’t find sleep. Maybe it was the pain? The quietness that was the lack of your family? Perhaps all that happened today. You did not know why. 

“I see you are awake. Much better as mother brings me food to give you” 

Turning but regretting it immediately you saw who it was. Ao’nung. Not that you have gotten terribly close. But now his face didn't initiate some sort of anger like it use to. “Oh. I would have thought only Ronal and Tsireya would come by.”

“Are you unhappy it is me?”

“Not particularly but you know what i mean”

“I know its just fun that you dont have enough bite as before”

You couldn’t really watch but you heard him set stuff aside as he sat beside you and began to feed you. Perhaps if you had witnessed this before or known before you would have rather died. But now you appreciated the gesture. 

“Tsireya will come by later to reapply some of the paste and change your wraps”

You nodded as you finished your meal. 

“You know. Now that im here i cant really deny but i am glad you are well and alive”

“Really now?”

“Is that hard to believe?”

“Not really” you spoke turning to look at him. This time the pain came from the stiffness in your neck from laying down for so long. “We may not be the best of friends but im Glad all of you are safe too you know?”

“You are strange as you are reckless you know?”

“Would you rather i have died?”

“What? No!”

You smiled.  Extending you hand to him for him to take. And reluctantly he did. All you did was gently rub his hand with your thumb. This sight would have made him hiss in anger before. His normal hand against your ‘freak’ one. But it was comforting knowing you were warm and alive and not dead. Like how you felt before. 

“If it were any of you I would also do this, you know? Not Just my family”

“But why?”

“Well i cant speak for you or for anyone really. But when you tend to know the value of a life that is not yours. You do some crazy stuff”

“Do you not value your life?”

“I do. I am thankful i'm alive right now. But I value all your lives a lot too. You are the Future of this Clan along side your sister if not you. I am without a home, remember?”

“Wow you really are strange”

“Are you saying if it was Tsireya you wouldn’t take the fall for her?”

He was quiet. For he didnt need to answer because you already knew. 

“Being the oldest makes you think the least bit about yourself eh?”

“Shut up you Skxawng”

You smiled. Yawning as you finally felt sleep welcoming you. “If i pass in my sleep. Please do not make fun at anyone else who seeks Uturu. Tho i know you made plenty progress already”

You didn't get to see his face fall. The thought of you passing was hard enough on your family he couldn’t really place why. But he feels like he’d mourn a lot as well. 

Watching you sleep he stayed there. Watching your Chest rise and fall. Perhaps he grew paranoid? Perhaps it was the drilling that he was to ‘protect all he can in the clan’ that his father made sure he knew. But he stayed there. Still holding your hand as he listened to you sleep. 

Had Tsireya not come by at night to change your paste and wounds. You wouldn’t have believed that Ao’nung sat there asleep holding your hand. 

And you may have calmed your quickened heart. 

“It seems the Wounds will take much longer to heal. But its made progress during the night”

You nodded as you listened to Ronal speak as she inspected you. “Understandable. Na’vi bodies or humans are built to take a bullet to the chest” you reasoned as you lifted your arm for her to wrap better. “However, I am feeling much better. Thank you”

“You still cannot move too much alright? I'm Afraid a nerve May have been scrapped as your arm is pretty stiff” 

You could only nod. Taking in a breather as you lowered your arm. “I thank you Tsahik. Tho i ask you how is My family”

“Out doing their Assigned jobs. Even that. Human is helping with a hunt right now”

You smiled nodding to yourself in reassurance. Flicking your fingers as you watched her go. Perhaps one day you can talk more comfortably. But you knew how stressful it was. She was to prepare for a child soon. And here you were taking up time. 

So in the silence of the home you stood and thought. Perhaps you could learn a thing or two, if she allowed it. All to help her of course make a fast delivery. Perhaps you were also just making some excuse to stay a little longer. You didn’t know. 

Time moved painfully slow and all you could really do was rebraid your hair. You silently cursing for the thick amount of hair that had managed to grow in such a small state.

You turned a little to look at the small sheer veil of a ‘door’ being moved. Tsireya greeting you and you greeting her back. 

“I see you can move more than yesterday” she says with a smile. Placing down a bowl of fruit” 

“Ah yes. Still sore. Kinda hard to rebraid my hair with just one hand”

“Would you like me to help you?”

“If you do not mind”

And without much word. Tsireya nodded, stepping behind you. And began to work with what your last hair style was. 

“Actually just braid the ends together please? I feel like i cant stand the pressure of them all in braids”

“Thats perfectly reasonable” 

You smiled feeling the hair loosen and give your head a rest. 

“You know it was kinda of sweet that My brother stayed by your side”

You could only roll your eyes. “ i still cant believe it” 

“But you better believe it. If i hadnt have to wake you You wouldn’t have believed my word” 

“Oh Eywa, I know. But its odd as to why he would stay. I mean we aren’t particularly great friends. Or really friends to begin with. I spend most my time here with you or Roxto at the very least”

“I do know. I was there for most of it” Tsireya spoke, finishing up the ends gently rubbing your hair with an oil that would help protect against the sea. “But Brother isnt at all against you guys now. Im sure now of all you guys can become friends”

‘Perhaps even more’ you silently hoped as you could only lay back down. “Perhaps in this time we can. And perhaps not.”

Tsireya smiled. Scooting the bowl closer to you. “Well I’ll leave this here for when you are hungry. Ao’nung will come by later with some more food”

You bid her goodbye. Listening to the waves. The calming of Eywa all around you. It made you thankful. Thankful to be alive at this very moment.

[ghostieboi1]

Lost Family Member

Copia x Male!Reader & Ghouls

Genre: SFW, angst, hurt, very little comfort

Summary: Copia and Male!Reader have been dating for a long time, the ghouls consider them parents even. The couple start talking seriously about settling down and even Copia retiring before he leaves for the last part of his tour, only to come back and have his dreams shattered.

Characters: Copia, Swiss, Sodo, Rain, Cirrus, Phantom, Aurora, Aether, Cumulus, Sunshine, Rain, Mountain, Phil (special guest for a special ghoul), Sister Imperator, Secondo, Terzo, Primo

Warnings: Death, major hurt, mentions of drugs that result in death, very little comfort, Sister Imperator and Phil (they deserve their own warnings for this one)

A/N: This one has been on my mind a bit because I wanted to write something sad but I'll admit, this kinda wasn't what I expected. This is also Sister Imperator's continuation of whatever her idea was with killing the three Emeritus brothers but taking it more personal, and I may have accidentally given her toxic mother in law vibes. I also cried while writing this so... GOOD LUCK!

Copia and you had been staying in bed all day, it was his short break in between doing his Europe tour and his USA tour. He didn't wanna do much and since most of his responsibilities were taken off his shoulders until the actual end of tour, he decided to just relax when he could.

You kept falling asleep and waking up randomly, your body had gotten plenty of enough sleep but the comfort both the bed and being cuddled by Copia made you sleepy. Neither of you got up other than using the bathroom or to get something to eat or drink, and neither of you planned on getting up today.

It was his last day before he had to catch a plan to head to the USA to finish up his tour, he wasn't gonna waste his time on something that demanded his attention and wanted his last day of break to be a relaxing one. He voiced his nervousness to you a few times, but that was all he would say when talking about the tour.

The day felt like it ended too soon as the night rolled in and Copia finally gave up on trying to stay awake and fell asleep for the night, you remained awake for a bit longer and cuddled him, hoping he'd sleep better so he was well rested enough to make his flight. Eventually, you fell asleep as well, your arms wrapped around his waist. You woke up the next day to an empty bed but a note was on Copia's pillow, you woke up a bit more before you read the note.

"Dear amore, I'm sorry we weren't able to say our farewells in person before I left but I couldn't disturb you when you were sleeping. As usual, I left behind one of my red jackets for you as you asked me to last time I went away. This tour will end up being a bit longer than last time but I assure you that I will be home eventually, and then we can start just being a family. All my love, Copia."

You couldn't help but smile while reading the letter, you sighed as you put the letter on your bedside table before deciding how you were going to spend your day today. Mostly you would either stay on yours and Copia's room doing whatever until he got back or you would go in about your day like normal, but since he was gonna be gone for a while, you could alternate between both.

The Ministry was very quiet without Copia and his ghouls, the Ministry was always a little bit quiet but it was eerily quiet without them. Copia always managed to call you after every ritual and check up on how you're doing, it was very sweet and sometimes he'd even fall asleep while on call. After a call with him after the LA show, you tried falling asleep.

Falling asleep without Copia was a bit hard for you, but you managed. You rolled over in your bed, now facing the door. Your eyes opened a bit and you saw a figure standing in the doorway, you didn't know who it was until the silhouette had a tail, now you knew it was a ghoul.

You didn't move, afraid to. The figure wasn't moving, just staring. You had always felt a bit vulnerable when Copia and the ghouls weren't around but now you really wished you had taken Copia's offer when he suggested that you join the tour with them.

The ghoul finally took a step closer, your heart pounding loudly in your chest. You tried to see if they were holding something but the darkness in the room made it hard to see anything, the lava lamp Copia bought giving very little light. You wanted to scream for help but you knew that sound didn't travel as fast as you would've needed it to in the Ministry and whoever this was would jump on you as soon as you made noise.

When the ghoul finally got close enough to you, you saw him holding a syringe. You didn't dare to question what was inside of it but you knew it wasn't good, that was when he tried to touch you. A small fight broke out between you two, you managed to knock the syringe out of his hand and it rolled away towards the bedroom door. The fight wasn't anything major other than you fighting for your life, you just needed to fend him off long enough for you to be able to run out of the room and to a dorm of siblings.

The ghoul managed to over-power you and someone rolled the syringe back to the ghoul, you weren't able to see them right away since you were panicking as the ghoul stuck the needle into your next and injected whatever liquid was in the syringe. The ghoul got off of you but you felt weak from both fighting and from whatever was just put into you.

You managed to roll onto your stomach and see who helped him, your eyes widened as Sister Imperator was ushering the ghoul out of the room. You tried to sit up but nothing was strong enough to keep you lifted long enough.

"Sister?" You managed to rasp out, catching her attention. "Why?"

She sighed before looking back at you. "I'm just doing what is best for the Clergy." Imperator simply stated before leaving the room, shutting the door behind her.

Copia grew worried his last couple show nights, you weren't answering his calls or texts. His ghouls noticed this and when they found out why he was so anxious, they talked to Aether and Sunshine, they still lived in the Ministry despite Sister Imperator wanting them gone.

Sunshine confirmed that she hadn't seen you in a while but thought you were just taking the relaxing time to yourself. Aether admitted to thinking that originally too but said that when he passed Copia's room yesterday, it felt too quiet. The ghouls decided not to tell Copia about anything the other two told them because it would've made him more anxious and try to cancel the rest of the shows just so he could come back home and see what was wrong.

Finally, the flight back home felt way longer than necessary due to everyone's anxiety about you. Copia honestly didn't know what to expect but he just hoped that you were okay, at least enough so he could be with you until further notice. What all of them didn't know was that Aether's feelings about this intensified and needed to know the answers, so on the day of their arrival, Aether went to Copia's room.

Upon initial arrival, Aether didn't notice anything that gave him info on your status. He gently knocked on the door, waiting for you to respond. When nothing came, he knocked again.

"Hey, it's Aether. You doing okay in there? Copia and the ghouls are coming back today." Aether called out, waiting for anything.

Nothing.

Aether gathered up the courage to open the door, he peeked inside the room before he noticed you on the ground, motionless. His heart dropped and he immediately was by your side, he shook your body and repeated your name, trying to get you to wake up. Finally he gave up and picked you up before bolting to the hospital wing, his mind was trying to think the worst but all he wanted to focus on right now was making sure you were okay.

Sunshine had sent him a text shortly after the doctors took you away, asking if everything was okay. Aether responded simply by texting.

"Wait by the main door. When they get here, lead them to the hospital wing."

Sunshine decided not to question and followed Aether's instructions, she ran the the main door and waited impatiently for the others to show up. When Copia and the other ghouls finally got there, she quickly told them all to just leave their luggage and to follow her. It was about you.

That was all that it took for Copia to follow very closely behind Sunshine, hoping his greatest fear didn't come true. Aether was pacing the waiting room and talked with them for a bit, telling all of them what he saw before a doctor came up to them.

"Is he okay?" Copia asked, his voice trembling a bit.

The doctor hesitated to respond, seeing as this was tearing all of them up inside. Finally he sighed before saying, "I'm sorry."

That was all it took for all of them. No one could help the tears that spilled out from their eyes. Copia was the first one to gather himself enough to further ask questions.

"What was the cause?" Copia asked, his voice laced in pain.

"We still don't know yet. We'll have to do an autopsy to pinpoint what it was." Silence was met with the doctor's answer. "I'm so sorry for your loss."

The doctor left, all of them had tears staining their faces. After a brief moment of silence, Sister Imperator walked into the hospital wing and saw them all standing there. She decided to wait until Copia came crawling to her to even touch the topic of your death, she quietly and quickly left the area and retreated back to her office.

The Saltarian, however, noticed this and decided to help them settle back home. He carried all their luggage back to their rooms without complaining and even showed some sympathy to Copia.

It wasn't even a full day since they got back and everyone was quiet, word spread throughout the Ministry and now everyone knew. You had been a part of a lot of peoples lives in the Ministry and you were well loved by everyone, some even claimed to say they wished you were their guardian of sorts. All of these words of mourn and condolences flooded Copia's and the ghouls' ears, they were the closest to you after-all.

Copia talked sternly about having a proper funeral for you with Sister Imperator, who originally believed you didn't need one. As soon as Copia was allowed to hold the funeral, he set everything up. When it came to knowing who you were both as a Brother of Sin and who you were prior to the Ministry, Copia knew everything. He spent hours picking photos you would've wanted on display for the funeral and picked all the flowers out, remembering the specific flower you liked. Ironically, Primo's old garden, that's now taken care of by Mountain, had just enough of the right flowers for this event.

The day of the funeral finally came, no one had a dry eye. Copia tried his best not to cry too much since he needed to be semi-professional and because he didn't want to smudge his Papal paints. Copia had hoped the first time he'd hold something for you within the church would be yours and his wedding, not your funeral. All the ghouls didn't wear their masks, it was a well known secret you had that you preferred the ghouls maskless and they wanted to keep to your wishes.

Sister Imperator didn't show up, but Copia didn't care. She had started becoming bitter to you once you and Copia started talking about marriage, this pissed Copia off beyond anyone's expectations. A short piano version of the song "Life Eternal" was played by Cumulus, she gently hit some wrong notes by accident but it didn't take a rocket scientist to simply glance over and see her eyes filled with tears.

Copia did the first speech, he had two, one as Papa Emeritus IV and one as Copia Emeritus. Some ghouls and some siblings held some speeches as well, Swiss' ended up being the second most gut punching speech besides Copia's. Swiss basically saw you as a parent, that you and Copia were his dads. Most of the other ghouls felt that way too but Swiss spent more time around you, he was clearly in pain by your untimely death.

It was one of your wishes to be cremated when you died, no one knew it would happen so soon but they all agreed to give you what you wanted. The funeral ended and then you were taken away to become ash, everyone mostly just went into their rooms to let out the rest of their feelings or to break the barrier that held during the whole event. At least, that's what all the ghouls did.

Swiss screamed into his pillow, Sodo almost broke his desk, Rain drew a bath for himself and refused to leave it, Mountain curled himself up into a ball and couldn't stop crying, Cirrus felt too numb to do anything, Cumulus kept being reminded of you.

The new ghouls, Phantom and Aurora didn't know how to handle these strong emotions. Phantom went to Aether for help, to which Aether calmed him down and said, "Sometimes it's okay to just feel things and not talk." Aether then proceeded to hold Phantom through the night. Aurora went to Sunshine, she couldn't talk but couldn't control her sobbing. All she was able to get out was, "I miss him." Sunshine broke down with Aurora and they just held each other.

Copia wasn't handling this any better. By now, he's gone through almost all the stages of grief but now his stuck on acceptance. He still didn't know the cause of your death, until two days after your funeral, the autopsy report was sent to him via email. You were drugged... just like his brothers.

After printing out the email, Copia marched his way to Sister Imperator's room. He barged into her office and demanded answers, she questioned why he went after her first, to which he laid down plenty of explanations that were all valid. Before she could ask anything else, he slammed the printed paper down in front of her and demanded to know what was happening. She remained silent for a bit before say how her intentions were good, causing Copia to laugh like he was losing his mind.

"What makes you think killing has good intention?!" Copia shouted, his eyes boring into Imperator's.

"We shouldn't be fighting over this." Imperator tried to excuse, but Copia wasn't having it.

"No! I want to know what the fuck happened to him while I was gone!" Copia demanded, this was the only time she's ever seen him get this mad.

"I just wanted you to continue the bloodline." Imperator admitted, she knew that he wasn't going to take this well.

Copia went silent, letting what she just said sink you. "You killed him in hopes I'd fuck around with a girl like my father?!" Copia asked, his voice starting soft but got louder at the end.

"Not exactly!" Imperator tried to justify, but to no avail.

"That was why you hated him! Hate to break it to you, but I was going to do the responsible thing and lay low and start an actual family with him. Maybe then I would've been able to do something I was proud of, not something I was forced to do." Copia explained, his heart completely shattering.

Imperator was at a loss for words, she knew that if word got out, she'd be hunted like a monster by the whole church. After Copia asked if she had anything else to fess up to and no response from Imperator, he left. He went back to his room and let everything go, all his rage, all his pain, and even his faith. The ghouls heard to commotion and went to check on him after it died down.

They found him sitting on his bed, his head in his hands as the room looked like a tornado just went through it. Swiss was the first to his side, making sure he didn't physically hurt himself both on accident or on purpose. Aether asked what was wrong and Copia explained, not holding the truth back. Now all the ghouls hated Imperator, and when the ghouls hated you, they didn't hide it.

"I need to speak with him." You said urgently, not paying any mind to the alive people around you.

"He already knows." Secondo's voice booms in the halls, louder than you expected.

You froze, tears brimming your eyes. Since your death, the three brothers have been helping you adjust. They had been here all this time but no one could see them, their coffins had been warded so their ghosts couldn't be seen. Your vase or box must've been similarly warded.

"Besides, regardless of what you do, nothing will work. We've all tried communicating with him." Terzo added, he had been one of the first dead Papa's to try and reconnect to the living.

"This isn't fair." You muttered, now staring at your hands that were a light shade of blue and a bit see through.

"Nothing will ever be fair—" Primo tried to comfort, but it didn't work.

"No, you don't understand. We were going to get married after he got back. He promised me, he even bought a ring when he was in America, he showed me one that he was thinking about." You explained, the tears left your eyes but didn't go anywhere else.

The three all looked saddened by this, silence filled the room you were in. They had overheard from the afterlife that you and Copia were talking about settling down but they weren't aware that plans had been set in stone.

"I at least have to see him, I need to know he's okay." You muttered, all three of them quickly glanced at each other before nodding.

"You can stay next to him for as long as you need to, he won't know you're there, but if you're lucky enough, he might feel your presence." Terzo explained, he wanted to give you as much information about being a ghost as he could.

You thanked them before running to try and find him, you figured he'd be in his bedroom, and he was. He was now laying in the bed, staring at the ceiling. He laid on his side, almost as if expecting you to be beside him. You started to slowly approach him, not sure what to do. Copia reached into his pocket and pulled out a box, the engagement ring he bought inside it. You sighed a bit before getting in bed beside him, you hesitated cuddling into him but decided to say fuck it and go for it.

Copia tensed before he relaxed and huffed a laugh. "Hello, amore." Copia muttered, he knew you were there.

You stared at him in shock before chuckling to yourself and resting your head on his shoulder again. "Hey, handsome."

[theaudacitytowrite]

Stay awake! (Sneak peek)

Part 1 is out!

A/N: Here's a little sneak peek of my upcoming Dean Winchester fic.

Since I finally started watching Supernatural, I'd say to expect a Season 1 -esque storyline... aka horror that's not really scary^^

I just wanted to see what you guys think of the beginning so far and if it's too slow-paced. The actual fic will be around 10k and play over the course of a week. So it takes a while to reach the climax of the story.

So... enjoy!

word count: 1.186

Dean’s feet lazily dragged over the ground. He groaned and huffed, sometimes a yawn would leave his throat.

„Come on, big boy. Let’s try it here.” you dragged him behind you while holding his hand so he would actually follow you.

You stepped up to the bed and breakfast, a rustic little single-family house. Dean and you were in desperate need of a place to stay the night. You had just finished a gruelling hunt and were beyond exhausted. But so far you hadn’t had any luck. All the motels in the area were booked.

“We can just sleep in Baby,” Dean muttered groggily.

“So you can whine about your sore back for the next couple of days?” you looked over your shoulder to look at him with a raised brow, “No thanks.”

"I wanna go home! My feet hurt, my back aches already and I'm tired! We've been on our feet the past 3 days!" he whined, pouting like a little overtired child.

“I know, my feet hurt just as bad and I’ve been awake just as long as you, you little baby.” you teased, “And I want to go home, too, but I don’t think it would be a good idea to drive another 5 hours to get home, while you nor I can keep our eyes open.” Dean grumbled but seemed to follow you more willingly now as he heard your reasoning.

When you entered the B&B a foul smell made its way to your nose immediately. It was sweet yet sour at the same time. You were surrounded by weird-looking paintings, figurines, and a collection of creepy dolls. It was quite dusty and weirdly gloomy in the house, and something just didn't feel right.

"Since when are bed and breakfasts worse than motels?" Dean muttered into your ear as he tried to not touch anything while walking through the small, crammed foyer to head to the unoccupied front desk.

"I don't know. We rarely visit bed and breakfasts." you shrugged as you let your gaze wander through the odd room. Dean scrunched his nose and almost pressed himself against you as he followed you like a shadow.

"Something wrong?" you glanced at him with an amused look.

"Nah." he shook his head and took a step back, "Just hurry up and ring the bell, so we can leave again."

“Leave again? You don’t think they have any vacant rooms?” you chuckled, “You’re so pessimistic.”

“I hope they have no free rooms.” Dean huffed.

"We have to tell Sam about this cosy little B&B. He'll love it here!" you snickered as your eyes roamed over the décor.

"He sure would…" Dean pressed his lips together, trying to breathe as little as possible. He bumped into you when you suddenly halted your steps, your gaze fixed on the fireplace in the next room.

"Do you see that doll?" you pointed in the direction of the fireplace. On top of it sat a little wooden doll with a rancid-looking dress. What caught your attention was, besides her size of an actual baby, her fluent movements. The doll seemed to wave in your direction, a wide grin plastered on her face.

"You mean that spawn of hell that creepily waves at us?" Dean dryly asked.

“Mhm… unnerving.” you hummed, completely focused on the doll.

„Good evening!“ the warm voice of an elderly woman suddenly chimed up, making you and Dean jump. “Oh dear, I didn’t mean to scare the two of you.”

“All good.” you chuckled, clutching your heart.

“How can I help the two of you?” the woman smiled endearingly.

“We were wondering if you still have a room available for one night. We tried every motel and hotel, but they’re all booked.”

“Yes, my dear. We still have enough rooms.” the woman quickly looked through her little notebook, “We got two with single beds and another free one with a double.”

“I wonder why…” Dean muttered next to you, earning a swift nudge from your elbow into his ribs.

“We would love to take the one with the double bed.” you smiled sweetly at the woman.

After checking in the old woman led you to your room. To your relief, the room itself was much brighter and less smelly than the foyer. And even the number of dolls was drastically lower and the décor was much more modern.

“Heh… weird.” Dean chuckled as he looked through the room.

“What?” you hummed as you rummaged through your bag.

“Isn’t that the doll that sat on the fireplace downstairs?” Dean inclined his head as he approached the doll that sat on an old commode.

“Maybe she got two?” you shrugged, heading into the bathroom to take a shower.

"Mhm." was Dean's only response as he inspected the doll. It seemed like there were no mechanics at all. Still, her motions were so fluent and lively. Dean carefully picked her up to not break her. He pulled away the crunchy feeling fabric as he searched for the battery pocket but couldn't find one, no matter where he looked.

"Must be some kind of solar thing," he murmured to himself and shrugged. He plucked down the little dress the doll was wearing when an idea popped into his mind, a mischievous grin spreading on his lips.

As you returned from the shower and opened the door, you jumped immediately.

“For fucks sake, Dean!” you growled as the doll sat in front of the bathroom door, smiling sympathetically at you as she waved. Dean meanwhile was giggling while lying on the bed, elated that he had scared you successfully.

“Got you!” he cackled triumphantly, making you roll your eyes at him.

“You're lucky I love you.”

“I know.” he smiled sweetly, before heading for a shower himself, pecking your cheek swiftly as he passed you.

The two of you soon settled down in bed, overripe for a good night’s sleep. Dean was out almost immediately as his head hit the pillow. You on the other hand seemed not so lucky.

You lay wide awake in the bed, not knowing why. All you wanted to do was sleep. Maybe it was the unfamiliar surroundings, maybe it was the rest of the adrenaline from the hunt that still ran through your veins. And it didn’t help that Dean was felling trees right next to you. One day you’d smother him if he wouldn’t get that snore checked out.

You jumped slightly when there was a soft thud echoing through the room. You glanced at the clock that stood on the bedside table. A few minutes past 3a.m. You glanced at Dean who was still fast asleep, completely unbothered by the sound. He really was exhausted.

You sat up in the bed and scanned the room. You chuckled when you realised that your duffle bag had fallen from a chair onto the ground. You lay back down and sigh, trying to give sleep another try. You nuzzled against Dean who quickly encased you in a hug, pulling you against his chest. You hummed contently and finally managed to drift off to sleep.

If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know:)

[marstonandson]

Anger and Worry Are My Best Friends

Abigail paces, trying to decide whether she ought to be angry or worried. She knows it’s both, but she doesn’t know what to do. The two emotions rear their ugly heads directly into her chest, and she hates how familiar it feels.

John is missing, has been for a whole day, and Beecher’s Hope is near silent. She had sent Uncle to search for him, but he had no luck. She keeps a brave face on for Jack like she always does, but he’s a smart boy. He worries, too. He knows what his father is like.

Stepping forward, she peers into the small crack through to Jack’s room, thankfully finding him asleep. Finally, after hours, he’d put down that book and rested his eyes. She won’t be sleeping, but that doesn’t mean Jack should share that same fate.

Unable to stand still, Abigail huffs softly and walks back to the living room, watching the moon try its best to peek through the cloudy night sky. She isn’t sure how long she stares out the window until she hears very faint hooves in the distance. Anger wins the fight against worry, then, as she hikes up her dress and storms out to the porch.

She watches John dismount his horse, hitching her much slower than he usually does. He whispers something to her and turns around, walking somewhat wobbly toward the house. The closer he gets, the more an uneasy feeling settles in Abigail’s stomach.

“Where on Earth have you been? What happened to you?” she asks, though it doesn’t have quite nearly the bite she wants it to, watching him hold onto the banister for support as he ascends the stairs to meet her.

“Sorry,” is all he can manage in the moment, and she gives him a once-over; thankfully, no wounds, just bloodshot eyes and sagged shoulders, looking the worst she’s seen him since he got attacked by wolves.

Some of the fire returns to her voice. “Sorry ain’t enough, John Marston!” She steps closer, resisting the urge to shove him. “You can’t just go off somewhere without tellin’ me! I thought you was dead or worse!”

Guilt settles into his half-lidded eyes. “I know.”

Her fire has nowhere to go. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen him like this before. Faltering, she takes a step back. “Alright, well…You gonna tell me what happened or not?” John tries to step forward, but his knees shake and she rushes forward to prop him up by the chest and shoulders, their faces inches away from each other. She can see, even in the dark, how deep the shadows under his eyes are. She can’t help but murmur, “Jesus, John…”

Perhaps, if it were up to him, he’d just lay down on the porch and stay there for a few days. She decides it isn’t up to him, and takes one of his arms to help him inside.

It’s somewhat of a struggle, but eventually she gets him to sit on the edge of their bed. While she’s working on taking off his belt and placing his hat on the nightstand, he mumbles, words slurring together. “Haven’t been sleepin’. Went to go visit Arthur’s grave.”

Abigail pauses, staring down at her hands for a moment. Charles had buried him a long time ago. She finishes taking off his shoes and stands up, hands on hips. “Why?”

“Been a year since all that,” he answers, slowly lifting his clouded gaze to hers. “Keep havin’ dreams about him, so I ain’t been sleepin’.”

Her heart thrums painfully. She misses him, too.

“Oh, John,” she sighs, wondering how long he’d gone without any rest, and steps forward to cup his face in her hands. He seems to melt into them. “He’d be happy, y’know. To see us here.”

His eyes flutter closed, and she can’t tell if those words comforted him or made it worse. She pulls back, stepping around to climb into bed, pulling him to lay down with her. He buries his face in her chest and she runs her fingers through his hair.

“Sleep, John.”

It doesn’t take much for him to relax. She stays awake for a few hours, watching over him, shooting occasional glances toward the hat that used to belong to Arthur.

As she drifts, she hopes that someday, the brothers will be reunited.

[barnesafterglow]

friday (i'm in love)

summary: every day you love bucky. every friday he pretends to love you too

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

word count: 2.3k

warnings: college!au, angst, phoebe bridgers made me do this, ambiguous ending

a/n: i've been working on this bad boy since august and finally got around to finishing it. i actually really like this and i hope you all do too! please remember to reblog and comment - i love getting feedback!

masterlist ─ i no longer have a taglist but you can follow @theafterglowlibrary and turn on notifications to stay updated on when i post!

The Monday sun trickled through your half opened blinds, waking more sweetly than you probably deserved. Your eyes cracked open, seeing a peaking glance of the blue morning sky, and a half smile made its way to your face. Mondays were usually hard for you but you thought that just maybe today would be a change.

That is until your hand reached for the other side of the bed, feeling the sheets cold from a body long gone. Any warmth the splashes of sun may have granted you seeped from your body, leaving you as cold and empty as your sheets. Disappointed - but not surprised - you slipped from underneath the covers and made your way to the bathroom. While you were waiting for the water to heat up, you hesitantly looked at yourself in the mirror.

It was the same as every Monday of the semester -  messy hair, the remnants of mascara just under your eyes, the peak of a smattering of bruises across your collarbones - always low enough that no one could see them but you, and the person who left them there. But they would mostly fade by Friday, just to be replaced over the weekend.

It was a pattern you had somehow let yourself fall into, no end in sight. Every time your roommate gave you the side eye, or poured you a glass of wine when she heard your muffled sobs over the sound of the running shower, or heard the door quietly open and close in the way too early morning hours while she was awake in the living room, you tried to come up with ways to end it, ways to break the cycle. You would never do it, of course, but maybe if you could imagine, just for a moment, an end to the hurt you put yourself through, you could take a breath of relief.

As you stepped out of the lobby of your apartment into late fall air, you tampered down a quick flash of anger. It didn’t seem fair that the light blue of the sky and the golden rays of the sun were allowed to be out and proud when your own blue mood was so dark it neared black.

But still, just like every Monday, you took a deep breath and headed to your first class.

You were halfway across campus when you saw Bucky, talking to Sharon, and the quick flash of eye contact before he looked away, not so much as a wave of recognition, threatened to bring you to your knees. 

And the sky remained blue and clear.

-

Tuesday was so dark and cold it gave you whiplash.

The second day of the week was always a little easier, the wound less fresh, and you eased yourself out of bed, still sore from yesterday’s workout - where you ran until you could barely breathe because it was the only time you stopped thinking of Bucky. The warm shower nearly held you hostage, knowing you would be faced with a bitter chill once you stepped outside.

You managed to get out despite the protests from every cell in your body, and spent a long time getting ready, delaying the inevitable.

Your heart thudded, heavy in your chest, as you navigated campus, never sure when your greatest daydream and darkest nightmare would emerge from the crowd to haunt you with empty eyes.

The universe granted you reprieve for a day.

-

Wednesday wasn’t as kind.

The same weather matched your overcast mood and you bundled up in the first sweatshirt you grabbed from your drawer.

It wasn’t until you were already out of the door that you realized it was Bucky’s, and you let out a choked sound before you composed yourself.

Of course it would be your luck to be just outside the building when you got a message your only class for the day had been canceled, and you decided to make the trip worth your time by heading to the library.

You studied for your upcoming exam, digging into your textbook with a highlighter and a middle-of-the-week attitude.

As you turned the page, it sliced your finger and you let out a hiss of pain. The other hand gripped your pen so hard you thought it might explode in a splash of ink and shame. From the way your week was already going, you honestly wouldn’t be surprised. 

Dropping the pen on the table with a soft clatter, you dug around in your bag, searching for tissues you knew you didn't have. You finally gave up, sticking the bleeding fingertip in your mouth so you didn’t get blood on the page of notes you had been diligently working on. You looked around to see if anyone had seen your miniature fiasco, but everyone else on the floor was either immersed in their own studying or chatting quietly amongst themselves.

In your glance around, the elevator doors opening caught your eye at the very same moment Bucky walked out. Your heart swelled in a flurry of hope as his face split into an easy grin, until you realized he was looking over you. You turned your head enough to see Steve and Sam just a few tables over, and Bucky took a couple steps forward until his gaze dropped enough to see you. And your sweatshirt.

He came to a sudden stop, smile disappearing from his face, and he took a sharp turn towards the corner of the library where the stairwell led back to the bottom floor. You could barely hear the slam of the heavy door over the shattering of your heart.

-

By Thursday, you had fully convinced yourself to move on.

You had one last crying session with Wanda, over a bottle of wine and a mountain of good advice you would try desperately to take.

With a warm buzz, you felt light and airy on the decision to do better, be better, be stronger. No matter how many times you had told yourself the last time was truly the last time, you were convinced this was it.

Instead, Friday brought you a hangover and a text from Bucky.

Usual tonight?

You ignored it all day. You turned your phone off, shoved your laptop in a drawer, took away any form of communication you had with him. You spent the day catching up on reading you had been telling yourself you would get to for months.

It almost worked.

Wanda was gone for the weekend - she mistakenly trusted your promise that Bucky wouldn’t be coming over.

Because by the time the clock struck midnight, you texted him back.

-

For most of the next week, you didn’t see Bucky at all.

Monday it was a downpour, the sky black and the wind cutting your skin. You knew he skipped class on days like that. After class, you went for a run, watching the rain splatter on the window that looked over campus, and tried to push him from your brain. It worked.

Tuesday, in the early hours of the morning, you got a panicked call from your mom. Your dad was in the hospital and she needed help for a couple days. You packed a bag and got in your car, heading home without a second thought.

Wednesday you were so busy you didn’t think about Bucky at all.

Thursday, it was almost easy to block Bucky’s number.

Friday, you heard it.

Knock. Knock. Knock knock knock.

The pattern that let Wanda know to disappear into her room, where she could pretend she didn’t know what was happening. Bucky didn’t like anyone to see him there, even the girl who heard everything the two of you did through the thin walls.

The doorknob rattled, and you could tell he was surprised to find it locked. Every Friday before, it had been left open for him.

Evening your breathing, you opened the door and saw his confused face. Your thoughts wrestled between slamming the door shut and leaping into his arms.

In the end, you did neither, stepping back and letting him trail you to your bedroom.

“You never answered my text.” There was no emotion behind the statement. He said it like it was a simple fact, no different than telling you that your walls were grey.

“I know.” He sat on your bed like he belonged there.

“Why?” You backed away as far as you could, your back hitting the wall, your arms crossing over your chest like they could protect you from his words.

“Why do you think?”

“I have no clue.” You were in disbelief. He had no clue? No clue what you felt for him? No clue that he broke your heart a little more every time he came and went?

“I’m done. With us.” You tried to keep your voice from shaking, but there was still a slight waver. You wondered if he even noticed.

“What do you mean you’re done?”

“I mean I don’t want to do this anymore. Don’t want to see you. Don’t want you here.”

“Why?” So many why’s. So many sharp words he didn’t even know were cutting you deep.

“What do you mean why, Bucky? This isn’t fair anymore! You stay here all weekend, you slip in my bed and in me and then you’re gone by the time I wake up Monday morning. And every Monday I can’t hold my tears back, even though I know you won’t be here.”

“Baby, you -”

“Don’t call me baby.”

He looked genuinely shocked, and you knew why. You had never raised your voice at him. The two of you had never even gotten in any kind of fight; he didn’t care enough to.

“Sorry, sorry. It’s just,” he stopped, seemingly gathering up his next words, “you knew what this was when we started.”

“And what is ‘this’? What am I to you?”

“You know what you are. You’re a… friend. With benefits. We said there were no strings attached.”

“No, you said there were no strings attached, and I went along with whatever you wanted because I knew this was as close as I could ever get to you loving me back.” The words flew from your mouth before you could catch them, and the tension that blanketed the room was so thick you felt like you could hold it in your hands.

“What?” His voice was barely a whisper, the first time he had shown any true emotion since he walked into your apartment.

“Just forget it.” You took a deep breath. “Get out.”

His eyes held a thousand questions, and you didn’t want to hear any of them. He sat, still as a statue, just staring at you.

“I said get out.”

It was like the words awoke him from a trance and he stood quickly, stumbling past you as he made his way out of the apartment.

-

The weekend hurt - the first weekend you hadn’t spent with Bucky in you didn’t even know how long.

But you didn’t cry.

You thought that might be a good thing.

-

By Monday, you were truly feeling better - the first Monday you could remember not having an emotional hangover. You got up early and went for a morning run, and didn’t even have to push the thought of Bucky from your mind. Then you went home and showered and got ready for the day. As you walked to class, you held your head high, a ghost of a smile on your face.

You felt good.

Then you saw him again. 

It was like deja vu, life in slow motion, a moment so perfectly timed you couldn’t even make it up in fiction.

You passed Bucky, the same as just a couple weeks before, talking to Sharon. Except this time, his arm was slung over her shoulder, a cocky grin on his face. Except this time, he actually looked at you, met your eyes in a stare, and his face dropped.

Except this time, gazes still locked, you watched each other, heads turned, until the moment passed and you were on your way, heart stilled in your chest.

-

Tuesday and Wednesday you couldn’t even get out of bed. 

It was like the small modicum of progress you had was washed away with the rain that pattered outside your window.

You wouldn’t - couldn’t - eat, so Wanda resorted to bringing you glasses of water, making you sit up and drink at least two before she would let you go back to wallowing.

She was a good friend; you knew she would make you get out of bed eventually, and she would help you move on. And you would try.

Thursday, the door cracked open, and you figured it was her finally coming to drag you out of bed. Instead, Nat and Wanda walked in.

Without a word, then got into bed on either side of you, and held you until you couldn’t cry anymore.

-

The weekend was easier. You went out with your friends you had been neglecting. You didn’t see Bucky. You felt better, at least a little bit.

You thought that maybe you would always love Bucky - love the way he touched you, love the way he would lay in your bed for hours and talk about anything and everything, love the way you knew each other inside and out - but you could also move on.

It was possible, you just had to try.

-

Monday night, you were sitting on the couch watching old TV reruns when you heard a shuffle outside your door.

Knock. Knock. Knock knock knock.

[hopefulromances]

hihi! i love your work! could I please request the first kiss prompt from the kiss list with sam obisanya? no worries if not, thank you!!

A Sam request! I'm so excited!

pulling away and their faces are all flushed and they hear nothing but the sound of eachother trying to catch their own breaths

Sam looked at himself in the mirror, straightening his tie. Then he undid it and took it off, letting out a sigh of frustration.

"Sam," Simi interuppted, coming over from her station. "You've taken that tie off and put it back on probably ten times now. What is going on?"

Sam smiled bashfully, looking at the tie in his hand. "I'm going out with a girl tonight... and I'm really nervous."

"OOOoooo, you have a big date, eh?" She teased, nudging him.

"Well..." She straightened him out so he was facing her then took the tie from his hand. "You must make sure you look the part..." She wrapped it around him and began tieing it together. "But most importantly, be yourself." She patted his shoulders as she finished. "Its impossible not to love you."

Sam took a nervous breath, but smiled appretiative. "Thank you, Simi. I truly appreciate your words of encouragement." His phone buzzed, letting him know that you were outside, ready to go. "Wish me luck!"

"You won't need it, Sam, " Simi reassured him. "Just have fun!"

When Sam saw you standing outside he thought his breath was knocked right out of him. You looked absolutely perfect with a sweet smile that would warm even the coldest of hearts.

Your date was the type of first dates that people write about in books and stories. The banter never died down and Sam lost track of time. Before the two of you knew it, the resturant you'd gone to was asking you to leave.

You were both slightly buzzed from the amount of wine you'd consumed so Sam offered to walk you home which you gladly accepted.

"My father used to say that a good night is a long one," he told you as he hooked his arm around yours as you walked down the street.

You giggled, leaning against Sam. "Well, tell me that the next time I'm awake at 2 am thinking about the embarassing thing I did in secondary school."

The two of you laughed. It felt so natural, laughing and chatting with you. Like you'd been doing it your whole lives even though you'd just met tonight. Eventually, you came upon your front door.

"This is me..." You said to Sam, pulling away slightly. You both stood, neither of you wanting the night to end but also not wanting to push things to far. "So I guess... I'll say good-"

"Wait!" Sam moved forward to stop you from going inside. You turned towards him eagerly. You were closer together than you realized, your faces inches apart. "Would you mind if I-"

"Please do."

With no more hesitation, Sam cupped your cheeks in his hands and kissed you. Hard. Your hands flew up to grab onto his shoulders, pulling him closer to you. The kiss didn't last long, just long enough to leave you gasping for air as he pulled away.

Neither of you moved, staying wrapped up in each other, faces flushed from the heat between you and the only noise the heavy breathing as you tried to catch your breath. Sam leaned his forehead on yours, letting a chuckle escape his lips.

"I took my tie off and on about 10 times before coming out to meet you," he admitted, breaking the silence.

You stared at him for a second. "Want me to take it off an 11th?"

Let's just say you took off more than just his tie that night.

[lolanoelle]

You Don’t Own Me

I was listening to You Don’t Own Me by Saygrace when this idea came to me. I hope you enjoy :)

Summary: You are disappointed that Sebastian hasn’t asked you to the Yule Ball yet when none other than Garreth Weasley asks you to accompany him. You are pleased to have a date until you overhear him bragging to his friends that he’s marking you as his.

You sat in the great hall sulking over your breakfast. You had been spending every free moment with Sebastian and there had been no shortage of flirtatious comments between the two of you, yet the Yule ball was right around the corner and he still hadn’t asked you. You never had really pushed the limit of the small flirting between the two of you, but you had still suspected that he might like you enough to ask you to the ball. Then again Sebastian was the type of person who had natural charm, so who’s to say that’s not all it could’ve been. You took a bite of your toast and washed it down with a drink of orange juice when someone had broken your train of thought with a tap on your shoulder. You turn to meet Garreth Weasley.

“Hi Y/N, I was wondering if you had a date to the ball?,” He asked, looking down at you.

“I- No I don’t,” You replied, your brows furrowing in confusion.

“Would you like to go with me?” He asked. You looked up to him in disbelief. You had always been friendly with each other but you didn’t think he would ever essentially ask you on a date.

“Um,.. yeah, sure!,” You say putting a smile on your face. You had no reason you couldn’t go with him and enjoy your time rather than be miserable about Sebastian not making a move.

“Brilliant! Ill see you there! Oh by the way, if you’re into matching, my dress robes have gold accents and I think you would look lovely in gold,” He says, shooting you a wink and walking away. Maybe going with Garreth would be a good change of pace for you. He wasn’t unattractive in the least and he was always kind. Your luck may have been changing.

You ate the rest of your breakfast and made your way to the library where you had planned to meet Sebastian and Ominis to work on your essay for History of Magic. You enter the library and go up the stairs and to a row of seats in the far back corner where you are met with the two boys.

“This is going to be the death of me. I can’t even stay awake in Binn’s class, how does he expect us to write a paper this long.,” Sebastian groaned throwing his head back in frustration.

“It would be easier without the complaining I can tell you that much,” Ominis said back in frustration.

“Having trouble already are we boys?,” You question, joining them.

“It’s hard to concentrate with him whining every few seconds,” Ominis responded.

“I’ll stop whining if you write mine, too,” Sebastian stated, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at the blonde man on his right.

“Not a chance,” He replied and you chuckled at the interaction.

“Well you’re in luck, Poppy let me borrow some of her notes. She’s brilliant so we should have no trouble finishing up these papers with her help,” You state, pulling out her notes and setting them in front of you three.

“I need to buy that woman her own puffskein for all that she does for us,” Ominis stated.

“Agreed,” Sebastian replied, taking the notes in his hands and looking over them. He rested his arm on your shoulder and flipped through the pages.

“I’ve actually been meaning to ask her to the ball, maybe a puffskein would help me in that department as well,” Ominis pondered.

“I say you’ve got a good chance regardless Ominis,” You reassured him.

“Do you two have any plans for the ball,” He questioned as his face turned a slight shade of pink.

“Actually, someone did ask me and I agreed to go with him since its only a week away and I didn’t already have a date,” You say looking down at your essay to avoid eye contact with Sebastian.

“Who?!” Sebastian questioned suddenly turning towards you.

“Uh, Garreth actually asked me during breakfast,” you reply scribbling down some more of your essay.

“Weasley?!,” Sebastian looked at you with shock and horror written all over his face.

“I don’t know any other Garreths, do you?” You respond slightly annoyed.

“He’s got to be up to something, he barely talks to you. Why would he ask you to the Yule ball?” Sebastian continued.

“Oh is it so hard to believe that someone would want to go to the ball with me?,” You bite back, getting angrier by the second at his reaction.

“I just cant believe you said yes to that prat,” He quipped back.

“Well I didn’t see anyone else asking me,” You spit out, yanking Poppy’s notes out of his hand and making your way to leave the library. You couldn’t believe his nerve. How dare he question Garreths motives. Did he really see you as so undesirable that he couldn’t believe you had gotten a date? You angrily made your way back to your common room and up to your room. You shut the door and plopped yourself on your bed and started to release tears of anger as you replayed the interaction in your head.

Sebastians POV

Sebastian sat in the library dumbfounded after Y/N stormed out. He knows he may have been a little out of line but how could she be that mad at him over something so trivial as her date to the ball.

“That was smooth,” Ominis said, breaking the silence.

“Oh piss off,” Sebastian replied.

“Don’t start with me. You should have asked her by now if you didn’t want her to go with anyone else,” Ominis stated matter-o-factly.

“Well now that I know she said yes to the likes of Weasley, she would have definitely said no to me. We’re the complete opposite,” Sebastian retorted.

“She would have said yes to you in a heartbeat Sebastian. You two are nearly inseparable and you’re constantly flirting with each other. It takes everything in me not to throw up during your conversations.,” Ominis replied.

“Don’t be so dramatic. So I tease her a little bit and she teases back. That in no way guarantees that she would have said yes if I asked her to the ball,” Sebastian replied to his friend.

“I’m blind, not deaf. You two are disgustingly head over heals for each other. It’s your own fault you waited this long. And since I don’t want to follow in your footsteps, I am going to go track Poppy down and see if she wants to accompany me,” Ominis said gathering his things and leaving Sebastian in the library by himself. Sebastian replayed the conversation with you in his head a couple of times and mentally kicked himself. He let out a frustrated sigh and knew that he owed you an apology for being such an prick. He got up himself and made his way to his own common room. He decided he would go to the undercroft after dinner, knowing that you would likely go there out of habit afterwards.

Y/N’s POV

You had just finished dinner and made the familiar route to the undercroft. You wanted to let out some steam and decided that the practice dummy would do for now. You entered and starting casting spells at the dummy until it was on the ground, looking worse for wear. You stood there looking down at it when you heard the entrance open and turned around to meet Sebastian. He made his way over to you slowly.

“I’m so sorry Y/N. I never should have said those things to you in the library. Any guy would be lucky to go the the Yule ball with you.,” He said, holding out a box of exploding bon bons as a peace offering.

“If you hadn’t brought the bon bons, I wouldn’t have forgiven you,” You say taking the treat from him. You couldn’t stay mad at him when he looked at you with those dreamy eyes. You hated how fast he could win you over.

“Well I’m glad I made the trip to Honeydukes since they worked in my favor,” He chuckled. You sat on the ground and opened them up and offered him one as he sat next to you. You spent the rest of the afternoon talking and practicing your dueling with each other until you were both tired. You mutually decide to make your way to bed for the night and resume your work on your History of Magic essay in the morning. As you exited the undercroft, you heard a booming voice from around the corner.

“No one is going to be able to take their eyes off of me at the ball with the arm candy I’ll have. I’ll be marking her as mine and everyone will be jealous that I got to the notorious Y/N before they did. I’ll be the talk of the ball,” Garreth bragged to his group of friends rather proudly. You stop in your tracks and look at Sebastian. You were seething with anger. You listened to him go on and he seemed to see you as an object rather than a person. You were about to step around the corner and make your presence known when Sebastian stopped you. You could hear Garreths voice trailing away and you looked at Sebastian with an angry look. As soon as he was out of earshot you started on a rant.

“Arm candy?!? And marking me as his?!! Who does he think he his?!,” You say as your face heats up in frustration.

“He’s such a git. I should kick his teeth in,” Sebastian said with a disgusted look on his face.

“Well I guess you were right in a way, he did have an ulterior motive to asking me to the ball. I guess I don’t have a date.,” You responded, obviously hurt.

“Well, this might be bad timing, but I actually did want to ask you myself if you would go with me,” Sebastian said bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck. Butterflies erupted in your stomach at the confession. Your furrowed brows relaxed and a smile broke out on your face.

“Of course I’ll go with you dummy, that’s what I wanted in the first place,” You said, looking down at your hands nervously.

“Then I guess its a date,” He said shyly. You felt giddy at the idea. Then Garreth came tumbling back into your mind.

“I guess I better break the news to the slimy bastard,” You say.

“Actually, don’t. Act as if everything’s fine. He wanted to put on a show at the ball, lets put on a show, except it will be as his expense,” Sebastian stated with a smirk on his face. You couldn’t refuse him and decided to go along with his plan.

Over the next week, you had kept in touch with Garreth and assured him that your plan was still in place. In his mind, you were wearing a gold ball gown and meeting him in the great hall to accompany him. He had bragged to everyone about his date to the dance. You had even had girls come up to you gushing about how cute of a couple you and him would make. None of them knew what you really had in store.

The Yule Ball was tonight and you were getting ready. You had decided on a silk sage green gown that would complement Sebastians dress robes nicely. It hugged your figured at the top and slightly flared out at the bottom. It was completely different than the dress you had described to Garreth. Your thoughts then moved to Sebastian and the reaction he would have to your dress. You were giddy at the idea of being Sebastian’s companion for the night. You were also nervous as the same thought. You had had feelings for him since you met him in your fifth year and were finally getting the shot you had wanted. You made your way to the great hall and found Sebastian outside waiting on you. When his eyes met you, they visibly widened.

“You look absolutely beautiful,” He said staring down at you. You blushed at his comment.

“You look pretty good yourself,” You responded as he held out his arm to link with yours. You obliged and made your way into the great hall.

“Sallow, who’s the unlucky woman to be attending with you,” Weasley himself commented as you both walked in. He looked over at you and his eyes looked like they were going to shoot out of his head. ,” What are you doing with him Y/N”

“Turns out Sebastian needed some arm candy of his own and I thought what kind of friend would I be if I denied him that honor. I mean with me on his arm, he’ll be the talk of the ball, right Garreth?,” you respond smirking. His face turned bright red, obviously embarrassed. His friends behind him looked guilty as well and you walked past them chuckling with Sebastian.

Throughout the evening, you and Sebastian danced and had a magnificent time. They had been playing more upbeat music so that everyone could get out their pent up excitement for the dance. You had both decided to take a break and sat down to get a drink. You were sitting at a table with Ominis and Poppy and you were all laughing together. The last song of the night was announced and the band switched to a slow tempo. Ominis and Poppy got up to dance together. Sebastian stood up beside you and your heart started beating a little faster.

“May I have this dance?,” He asked smiling widely, holding out his hand. You graciously accepted and stood up to join him. You were closer than you had been all night and you were sure that Sebastian could hear your racing heartbeat from your nerves.

“I’m so glad Garreth messed up his chance with you so I could bring you instead,” He whispered looking down at you.

“I am, too,” You responded quietly looking into his eyes. He took your joined hands and placed them on his chest, his other one still on your waist and your other on his shoulder.

“I’m just sorry it took me this long at all to take you on a date,” He confessed, watching for your reaction.

“I almost didn’t think you felt the same way honestly,” You responded.

“Oh sweetheart,” He said reaching up to brush some hair behind your ear,” How could I not.”

His hand rested on your cheek and your ran your hand from his shoulder to the back of his hair. You both glanced down to each others lips and slowly leaned in, meeting in the middle to connect your lips. This was the perfect ending to the night that you had wanted for a while now. You couldn’t be happier at the events that had played out.

*The dress below is the dress I imagine Y/N wearing to the ball.

[tiddygame]

A deleted chapter from the Ghoap god type AU!

[Ao3 link]

This is why Ch 4 took so long to come out, I got stuck on this for weeks trying to make it work. I wish I could have kept it as a smoother transition from Ghost's drastic leap in emotions from Ch 3, 4, and 5 but it never felt right :( Hopefully that leap still feels like the natural illogical turmoil of an idiot realizing he's lovable but who knows! As you'll notice, a lot of this (especially the intro) was repurposed for the actual chapter 4 and even some of chapter 5

This is unedited from how I found it in my docs, good luck o7 [and copied and pasted straight from ao3 drafts]

Ghost wasn’t fully asleep, but he wasn’t fully awake either.

The battles always had a special way of draining him unlike any other fight. While he wasn’t physically tired, he was emotionally exhausted. Stuck in a state of misery, he was too jittery to sleep but did not have the mental fortitude to make himself stand up.

He’d shucked his helmet but the rest of his armor stayed, too drained and paranoid about getting caught off guard to remove it. His hood was pulled low, his head ducked in an attempt to both block out the light and conserve warmth.

They were on the cusp of winter and continuing their march north; Given the way the clouds looked, it wouldn’t be long before their first snowfall. Ghost was ashamed to admit it, but he never did well with the cold. 

It was warm where he grew up so he never became accustomed to the frosty chill of a true winter. The closest he’d ever been to seeing snow was when the pond near his childhood home froze over with a thin layer of ice.

He huddled closer to himself, staying out in the lie that he could buff his cold tolerance if he sat in the freezing wind for long enough. He was meant to be the perfect soldier with no weakness, and yet a slight breeze had him shaking like a leaf. 

“You look cold,” Soap noted. 

Ghost jumped, “Shit! Stop doing that!”

“Sorry,” the god said, with a smug tone and smile that said he wasn’t very sorry. Ghost just closed his eyes once more as if he could fall asleep. Soap sat against the tree as well, mimicking his position to his left all the way down to how his legs were extended and crossed at the ankle. 

Ghost glanced over, trying to keep the sun out of his eyes even as he turned. The god looked different than the past two times he’d seen him, still not emulating his original paintings and sculptures but thankfully not the headache inducing half tangible/half mist thing that he had been the first time they met.

His skin was still pale, but his hair was even lighter this time, now closer to blond. Soap stared at him right back, also still significantly shorter. Although, his eyes were blue this time, just like his portraits. The longer he stared, the more curious he became over the rather sudden switch in appearance. 

His curiosity got the best of him as he asked, “Why doesn’t your form affect me in the same way it did when you first appeared in the temple?” He regretted asking it immediately; It felt almost like a taboo for Ghost to be the one to so openly acknowledge the more inhuman parts of the god.

Soap was caught off guard, asking, “What?” But he processed the question before Ghost repeated it, looking away and staring straight ahead. “Oh. Right. Sorry.”

Ghost didn’t know what he was apologizing for.

“I didn’t have a good grasp on all of,” Soap gestured with his hands, Trying to find the right word. ”Well, this,” he finished lamely, gesturing between them.

“You seemed to grasp my arm well enough.” Ghost was the one who said it and even he wasn’t sure what the hell he meant by that.

“Yeah. Sorry,” Soap apologized.

“What for?” 

Soap just looked up at him, confused so Ghost clarified, “You keep apologizing. What for?”

Ghost watched in confusion as the god shifted uncomfortably, staring down at his lap. “It’s been a while since I’ve interacted with mortals… or anyone really. I’ve kind of forgotten basic conversational skills. I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable.”

Now it was Ghost’s turn to stare in confusion. This god certainly was an odd one, that was for damn sure. 

“Uhh… Thanks?” Two socially inept people trying to converse, how wonderful.

When Soap chuckled at his response, he surprised himself by almost chuckling along, for once feeling like he was being laughed with and not at. And what a novel feeling it was, to enjoy talking with someone. Even if the person was an immortal deity.

The conversation drifted as the silence stretched; It was probably the longest the god had gone without speaking since he began coming down to play mortal.

Ghost closed his eyes like he would be able to fall asleep but the longer he spent trying to sleep the more he realized that he still had at least one more question about the god’s appearance.

Soap not being used to the limitations of the mortal realm made sense, but it didn’t answer why he looked nothing like his original depictions. While the depiction of a god could change slightly between artists, there were a few staple features that were left unchanged. 

From his research, most seemed to agree that the god of death was tall with tan skin, dark hair, a (rather stupid, in Ghost's opinion) mohawk, blue eyes, and the build of a fighter. The man next to him had blue eyes, and that was about it; He looked like he’d never seen a day of hard labor once in his entire immortal life.

[]

He wound up doing a double take when he spotted something… peculiar and… specific about his appearance. Ghost looked down at his lap and then back to Soap’s a few times, confused. For once, it was Ghost who broke the silence as he questioned aloud, “Did… Did you steal my hand?”

“Hmm?” Soap looked up from where he too had been feigning a nap.

“You— My hand. You have 3 ½ fingers on your left hand. Same as me.”

Soap took a deep breath and looked askance as if he were embarrassed, “Oh, right. That .” 

Ghost waited for Soap to speak, but he remained silent. Realizing he wasn’t going to say anything else, Ghost repeated, “Yeah. That . Did you steal my hand?”

There was another extended silence before he finally answered, “I mean, you still have your hand so I didn’t steal it technically—”

The god was squirming and Ghost’s interest was now fully piqued, “Soap. You know what I mean.”

Soap let out a huff like he was hoping he could stall long enough that Ghost would forget about the question, “Well, I mean— Okay, yes but also no.” He was gesturing with his right hand, trying to distract from the way he’d hidden his left under his leg. 

“Soap!”

“Yes, alright! I did!” He huffed again, “It’s easier to simulate what you see around you than it is to make something new.” He sank against the tree trunk with his arms crossed, managing to pout while still looking embarrassed. 

“But your physical form already existed?”

“It’s been a while. I’m still trying to remember how to look human, much less recreate how I used to look.”

Ghost could already feel a headache pulling at the base of his skull. “I don’t follow.”

Soap opened his mouth like he was about to speak, but then changed his mind and let out a sigh of air. He squinted off into the distance, thinking, before he finally landed on a simple explanation. “Which one is easier if you don’t have a mirror: to draw yourself or to draw someone else?”

Ghost just hummed in response. It made sense, he supposed, in the same way everything else does when it comes to godliness. Meaning it didn’t make sense and mortals had to scramble for a logical reasoning behind the illogical. 

“But why my hands? Wouldn’t it be easier to copy a hand with five fingers?”

Soap got all fidgety again and began messing with his fingers, “Um, well, like I said, it’s trickier to try to create something. Just to mimic it is easier, even if it’s… less normal?” He stumbled over the last two words, unsure of how to phrase what he meant. 

Had it been anyone else, Ghost might have taken offense to that but considering the god was struggling to exist in the mortal plane, he’d let it slide just this once. He knew what the god meant, or at least thinks he does. All of it made sense so long as he didn’t think about it. 

[Why would he be upset at Soap saying his hand isn't normal? He already implied that with his question??]

Soap sighed again, likely frustrated with his inability to explain what was a simple concept to him and apologized, “I’m sorry. I should have asked before,” Soap vaguely waved his left hand in the air. “I didn’t even think about it.”

Ghost surprised himself with the speed of his response, “No, it’s okay, I—“ he paused. Soap was staring at his left hand (more so his version of Ghost’s left hand) and he noticed something. “Wait. Give me your hand.”

Despite the demanding request, Ghost didn’t wait for an answer to reach across Soap and pull his hand closer. [<-Nonsense ass sentence.] The angle was awkward and by the time his hand was close enough for Ghost’s inspection, the god had been yanked over onto his side, his right forearm propping himself up and his head bumping into Ghost’s upper arm. 

He barely even noticed the contact, too intrigued by the god’s imperfect copy of his hand. 

“Interesting…” He muttered to himself. 

Every time they had met, Ghost had been wearing gloves. It’s likely the only thing that made the god’s odd touchiness bearable, but it also meant that the god had never seen what lies below the fabric. 

Ghost had lost his pinky and part of his ring finger to third and second degree burns. It was beyond a miracle he had been able to keep his hand, to only have one and a half fingers amputated was proof that not every god was out to get him. However, the amputation was not the only evidence of the incident. 

The scarring was prevalent on his entire hand and extended far up his arm. While not amputated, his left middle finger had been damaged enough that the nail never grew back properly. It was still there, but was slightly off center and shaped awkwardly.

The medics did an incredible job with everything, but they could only do so much about the skin contractures. He maintained almost full functionality, but it still ended in him being unable to fully open his hand.

[STOP THE FUCKING MEDICAL DRAMA YOU FREAK] {Better now, but still needs shortening}

All of the deformities and irregularities were missing from Soap’s version. 

The nail on his middle finger looked normal, his ring and pinky finger just so happened to stop short of where they would normally be, there was no scar tissue connecting his fingers and palm, and the skin was completely smooth. It was eerie to look at. 

The more he stared, the more he found that was slightly off. 

Most of it was small and simple. Soap’s skin was still very pale yet he had no visible veins, there was hair on the back of his hand but none on his fingers, all of his nails were the exact same length with not even a hint of dirt under them, and the lines on his palm didn’t line up with where his palm creased when relaxing his hand. They were so subtle, it wasn’t something you couldn’t unsee, but something you noticed and then struggled to find again.

“Interesting,” Ghost repeated. It seemed Soap remembered the hallmarks of what makes a human look human but stumbled on the  finer details. He was able to skate past uncanny valley but still had much to improve on. With his inspection complete, Ghost looked down to where the god was half lying on the ground, watching him. 

The god.

It was so easy, too easy to forget that Soap was something he should be begging for mercy, not yanking around to appease his own curiosity. They’ve met all of three times and he’s already let his guard down this much? [!] Gods above, he needs to get himself together.

He dropped Soap’s hand like it burned him, “S— Sorry.” He needed to say more, more than a stuttered, one word apology, but it was all he could manage. He balled his hands into fists like it was the only way to stop him from repeating the same mistake again. 

The god looked upset, whether it was angry or annoyed, Ghost didn’t know. He stared for a moment longer, a moment too long, before slowly sitting back up, “It’s… It’s fine.”

Fuck. 

Ghost hadn’t the slightest clue what to make of that but he knew it couldn’t be good. The tone was lost to him, the pause spoke of misfortune, and the word choice spelled disaster. 

The fact that he hadn’t already been killed scared him. He should have been. He should have been a long time ago. Ghost didn’t get it. 

Maybe it was all a ploy. Maybe the god was biding his time, keeping a mental tally of all the disrespectful shit he does. That way, when he’s back at full power, he can torture Ghost as much as he wants, however he wants. Now that he saw it, it was so obvious he wanted to slap himself for his stupidity. There was something about the god that made him act like a complete idiot and he hated it.

And like a child, Ghost decided that what he couldn’t see couldn’t hurt him. He turned back, facing the field once more and shook his head to make his hood fall low enough to obscure his peripheral vision.

He hadn’t noticed, having been so wrapped up in his own little world, but near the god, the chill had faded. Now that he pulled away, it was back in full force. Being the coward he was, it almost made him huddle back to Soap just for the warmth. 

Ghost had already sealed his fate when he almost died with an arrow in his chest. The god might have said he didn’t owe him, but it was a load of shit. He still hoped that he could save himself, despite knowing it to be a fruitless venture.

A smart man knows that a familiar devil is better than one unknown. He didn’t like the general, but at least he was familiar with his limits and the punishments that came when those limits were surpassed. And yet Ghost sat poking and annoying an ancient god despite all logic screaming at him to run. 

Perhaps it was his twisted way of taking control over his life. Sitting under that tree, he was doomed to spend the rest of his life as an attack dog with his leash in the hands of a man he hated. But Soap offered another way out.

If he annoyed Soap past the point of no return, his leash would be severed. He’d spend the rest of his life and more as an Old God’s little human doll until his mind broke, but it would be a fate that he, Ghost, set in motion.

Ghost was horrified at the fact that he was comforted by the idea. The deafening white noise he hadn’t been aware of immediately dissipated. His ears were ringing. He was manually breathing, counting every breath in and out. sdhfksjdfhkjalsdhfjklsdah

Then they kiss or fuck or sumn i dunno

Notes: I wanted to keep this so bad but I was nervous about committing to like... a set of rules for gods in this world? Esp so early on in the drafting/writing process. It felt a bit too on the nose and, well, depressing with that last inner monologue too. Not to mention that it felt mismatched; I think that by the time Ghost would have been comfortable enough to fuckin gawk at Soap, Soap would have had a much better grasp on his appearance.

Also I felt bad for stealing the generally accepted hc for Roach's scars and slapping them on Ghost lmao

Also also, if you read something in this and though "oh, wait, that clarified something from the main story that went unexplained. why wasn't it included?" the answer is that I probably forgot that I cut it

[honey-minded-hivemind]

hi! I loved the crow anon story thing so much it was so great! I was wondering if it was possible if you could do one with like a Honduran bat hybrid reader (magic choice up to you but I thought potion magic would be cute) who overworks themselves a lot and the platonic yans are like ‘>:0’

Aaaawwwww! Honduran bats are so cute!!! I'll see what we can cook up! And potions, yes! May I call you Bat Anon? Let's do it like this:

• You tended to be a busy bee (well, bat). Always cooking up a new potion, picking out ingredients and charms, writing instructions and symptoms for each one, selling the latest in helpful potions and magical ones, such as ones for mental wellness, emotional-filling, and mini good-lucks and warm-feelings, along with fairy-wings and plant-growing and rain-making and so many, many more... It kept your hands and wings busy all night and all day long, overworking your wings and hands trying to make enough!

• Your newest patrons were animal hybrids. Ones who were always asking which ingredients you used and buying any potions that caught their eye. They always complimented you and your craft, and happily told you where to find the best ingredients and which vendors were nice. They always payed well, leaving tips, too. And with the sudden increase in customers and demand of your wares, you had to work extra hours just to keep up with the demands...

• By the next month, you're exhausted. Only two or three hours a sleep per day/night, drinking enough caffeine-filled beverages to wake up a snoozing dragon, and underweight due to neglecting to eat, all in the name of keeping your business running and ahead of the competition. You've almost fallen asleep on customers a few times, only to chug a potion that happened to be a mix of coffee, adrenaline, and lightning, to keep yourself awake. Your newest friends, those odd patrons of yours, took offense to that.

• The moment you tell then how you've been able to keep your small store stocked and the customers happy and with their potions, you're met with hands dragging you to the back and pushing you onto the nearest sofa or chair or bean bag. Next thing you know, heavily-scented tea is shoved into your hands, and you're ordered to drink every last drop. Any protest is met with a firm no, and you're told theyll handle your store when you need to rest. Starting now.

• The moment the tea hits your tongue, you're relaxing into the plush surface beneath you, sighing contentedly. A warm mix of lavender, honey, and caramel fills your tastebuds, and you quickly down the rest of the cup. Once you finished, a wave of calm, relaxed sleepiness tugs at you, then you're lying down, snuggled under a blanket that had been tucked around you. The background noise of clinking bottles and stirring liquids send you off into a fuzzy slumber, for once your body and mind getting the rest it needs since you opened up shop...

• The platonic yans keep the shop afloat, those who excel at potions mixing up the ones that were written down on a list, while those who are able to refill samples and clean up do so. They care about their little baby bat, and they shouldn't have to run themself into the ground just to please others and to keep themself in business. So they'll help as much as Reader needs, all while making sure they rest and eat and take breaks. If they have to set a day where their shop stays closed, so be it. Their little bat bud needs rest and relaxation, which they'll happily supply them with!

• If any rude customers or bigots try to start something or insist to speak speak Reader or try to break anything, the adults will happily deal with them (setting Wolverine and/or Sabretooth and/or even Erik on them). The teens can keep the shop tidy and make sure Reader gets their scheduled sleep, as well as takes any tea they make them and eats their meals. And if Reader is a little cold, no worries. They can happily volunteer one of themselves to cuddle with them while they rest...

• The platonic yanderes all care about Reader, and while they love their potions, they'll make sure Reader is well-rested and fed and feeling well before they let them go back to making them. And if they maybe start to offer to work with Reader, or join their businesses together (or maybe slip them into their coven by "accident"), well... Whatever helps keep them warm and and feeling well, right?

[gryphonlover]

Unscheduled Brainrot‼️

It’s been a very interesting day for me, I do not usually wake up before 9:30/10, but I slept on the couch last night so I’ve been up since 6 and everything has felt very odd. I got bit by a mosquito and I’m so so mad because I have horrible reactions to that shit so my whole wrist is super swollen now (which is partially because I’ve messed it up again-) and theres a huge red ring around the bite and I’m five seconds from eating my own hand off. I’m aware that would be frowned upon but also I am dying (/j). I’m mainly just really mad because now I can’t wear my brace

Good news tho! Typing on my computer last night WORKED and I started and finished an entire whumptober fic last night AND started another one that I really hope to wrap up tonight (assuming I can stay awake past 9 pm- I accidentally committed to a club so I’m stuck on campus late) but my physics professor bullied me in front of the entire class and I’m going to direct my annoyance into whumptober because biting him is wrong 🫶

Also I went crazy and cut my hair, and I’m kinda happy with it (i wish i’d been able to cut the back shorter) but I forgot if you cut your bangs shorter to make them look slay, they will not be long enough to tuck out of your face- so i can no longer see for shit-

Anyways remember to take care of yourself and get some food and water and rest, and I hope you’re doing well :)

- crazylittlejester

@crazylittlejester

Mosquitos are an unfortunately necessary evil, but that's never stopped me from hating them any less. They creep me out. Fingers crossed the bug bite gets better soon.

That's great! I'm part of the student newspaper at my university, so I write ~600-word articles every week in addition to my regular classwork and hobby writing. 🙃 It's very satisfying, and I enjoy it a lot, but it's a commitment. There's a reason I'm not a regular member of any other clubs on campus.

Oh dear, good luck with that. Hopefully you can figure something out until they grow back out again? It should get cold enough for hats soon, maybe that'll help?

Thanks. 👍 Lunch was nice, but I've been stressed about the previously mentioned health problems, so things are... suboptimal right now. I'm just chilling with one of my roommates now.

[lazodiac]

ONCE MORE, we delve into the plane of Thunder Junction, in our attempt to figuring out what each plane each card is from.

Last time we finished all the monocolour cards, and you can find all of those here. I'll also been including a villainy score for Oko's gang, to see how much they count as villains... and in retrospect wish I'd done that for all the legends, since this is a VILLAIN set. Call that a project for another day...

For now though, let us enter into the wild, wild world of...

MULTICOLOUR

We open off with a big one- Akul the Unrepentant! The main antagonist of the story, a PERFECT black-hat western villain- he is fierce and evil and SMART but also you can bait him with the right words and at the end of the day he's just a right bastard with a gun. An honestly pitch-perfect villain for a villain set.

The way his scorpion mandibles make a cowboy hat silhouette, his gun-stinger tail and his fire breathing claws, he is a perfect example of what a Scorpion Dragon is and how strongly it fits the aesthetic of the plane.

But we've been told all the Scorpion Dragons are from Gastal, an obscure plane from Urza's Planeswalker novel, so they're from Gastal. I hope we go there one day and learn what that plane is like beyond its very sparse appearance elsewhere.

Annie Flash! Our first member of Oko's gang to rob Akul! She's Atiin so from the Atiin Plane, and is the only Atiin that shows up in story. We learn from her stories that her people are still out there wandering, while some settled in Thunder Junction.

Among them her nephew, who Akul afflicted with tuberculosis with his stinger (it's some kind of dark curse but given how it is described it's absolutely TB, a fitting disease for the time period). He left to join his people, because staying in bed all day half asleep from medicine is worse than suffering while awake.

At any rate, she's retired to protect the town she's ended up in... and is threatened by Oko into helping take down Akul. On the villainy scale she is a fierce 0/10. I wish she'd just shot Oko in the head.

Annie Joins Up is one of a cycle- all of the major members of Oko's gaing gets little pieces like this. They're clearly part of one singular mural but we haven't been shown it and it makes me sad.

Given the context, I'm counting these cards as Thunder Junction original.

A strange, fascinating card, it's a sherrif's sterling silver star, radiating various creature spirits out of it. Given the form of magic at play I'm gonna say this is from Alara, since it resembles the Nacatl totem magic.

Hellspur Mercenaries holding, unfortunately, YOU at knifepoint. Good luck friend cause I'm out of here.

... okay I'll stay long enough to say it again; Hellspurs threw away all ties to their home planes to become dyed in the wool magma mutants. They're from Thunder Junction now. The predominance of glowing purple and dyed hair could imply these individuals are from Kylem, but I'm sticking to my thunder-guns here.

This is the only real indication that the cactus folk are "new" to the plane, despite having lived here for generations as non-sentient cacti. I don't really like this, but whatever. Native to Thunder Junction.

The Sterling Company's shiny leader, in the vampiric flesh. Given his style he's definitely from New Capenna. He doesn't show up in the story at all, but his presence is felt by the colonizing cops that he employs.

Big ol' Bonny Pall is our distaff counterpart to Paul Bunyan, the American lumberjack of old west mythology. She's even got a massive blue ox to help her out!

She's one of the giants from Eldraine, and if I could remember where I saw blue oxen on that plane I'd tell you to confirm it.

Everyone's favorite goblin-monkey, Breeches! A secondary member of Oko's gang, though in truth his loyalties lie with his captain, Vraska. His main goal in the story is blowing things up- as is his want- and showing us that he has more self control than Gisa does.

As far as villainy goes he's a soft 2/10. Nothing he does is inherently evil, the pirates of Ixalan (his home plane) are categorically the nicest faction present there, and ultimately he's only with Oko to help Vraska betray him.

Bruse Tarl! There's absolutely no reason he should be here in the villain set, but also he's a cattle rancher who is a fan favorite on a plane where ox and cattle are well known an aesthetic so of course he's here from Zendikar, having finally found some beasties that listen to him.

Fun fact; the four visible livestock on the card include Pillarfield Ox, Ox of Agonas, Vigor, and Bartered Cow. These cards won't add to the total, but are here and that's cool.

Also fun fact: according to the card crafting stories, this card was originally Strongarm from Lorwyn/Shadowmoor! Neat!

A cactus with a gun! Native to the plane, and my friend.

Gryff's are the wonderfully unique heron-hippogryffs of Innistrad, so this beautiful bird-beast is from there.

Who????? Who are you???? You have human hands but are otherwise completely just a bear man??? The only plane where ANYTHING like this even remotely exists is fucking Blobavia, in the Un-iverse? Who are you??? Why is there no legend article for this fucking set?!?!?

I have no fucking clue where this guy could be from, but the flavor text leans me towards Arcavios. This is some random bear druid man from Quandrix House.

Eriette, the Beguiler! She's one of the secondary members of Oko's gang, despite being ostensibly the first one recruited (or at least the first recruited on screen, by Jace-as-Ashiok). She is of course from Eldraine, and even has beef with Kellan, the newest member of the gang.

Beef that she puts aside! For the mission! Because her evil plan on Eldraine was "I will treat PTSD from the invasion by offering the chance to go to sleep forever, and will coincidentally get to rule the plane" which is like, not even THAT evil? It's misguided and kinda fucked up but not like, EVIL evil? And despite anger at seeing the DIRECT guy responsible for her defeat, she still buries the hatchet. This is like, a 1/10 on the evil scale.

Also there is the slightest, slightest implication she might have poisoned Oko at the end of the story. If she did she gets a "Nahiri did nothing wrong" modifier.

This delightfully cheery grandma is from Zendikar, and is doing what she does best: climbing stuff! She's a new character as far as I can tell so we know nothing about her otherwise, but she's survived the Eldrazi and the Phyrexians and is still smiling so she's okay in my book.

Notably, she does get some fun flavor text on other cards.

The flavor text feels at odds with the vibe of what formring a posse would be- normally this sort of gearing up of the locals would be to fight AGAINST the Sterlings coming in and taking the entire plane, but I digress.

The specific sort of decorations of the town and the people involved feel Atiin to me, but I think I've gotta give this to Thunder Junction proper.

Ghired is a fascinating character to me, because he's shown up before and despite doing so still has no real character and has not contributed to any of the stories he's in. Which is a shame because he's one of the best concepts they've ever come up with, from the best plane they've ever made; he's someone on Ravnica who left one Guild to join another!

This Selesnyan shaman turned to the Gruul Clans after witnessing Illharg, the biggest of the big pigs, rise from the primal earth of the plane! Despite joining the Gruul he still has a Selesnyan connection to wildlife, and on a fully untamed plane like Thunder Junction he is THRIVING. It's so cool! He should do stuff!

It's time for a controversial legendary! It's the Gitrog monster, freshly done being Thalia's steed during the Phyrexian Invasion. He's bullfrogged his way tot Thunder Junction, and now people want to turn this one cult inspiring hypnotoad into just another wild and wacky horse to ride.

I get it. I get why people find this to be a discrediting of the Gitrog from fearsome monster to funny creature, but it honestly works? Innistrad is a plane of horrors, and what happens to horror media when it recurs? It reduces, with each iteration. The best horror film franchises start and end at one, maybe two if you're lucky, and it only takes a complete and total revitalization and reimagining to fix it.

For now, Gitrog is a funny horse, but maybe one day he'll be the monster you remember from your nightmares.

A scam artist and swindler from Innistrad, Old Honest Rutstein is a surprising pull for the plane... and yet works perfectly, as snake-oil salesmen fit the old west aesthetic perfectly. Has many a fun flavor text in the set, and notably is NOT a hellspur. He's just got some fun glowy corn husks to play with.

Was the first card from the set teased as preview art before this story arc began.

The name is a reference to Misinformation Campaign, one of the best cards from Guilds of Ravnica, but mechanically it really is more like Dovin Baan's stupid planning and plotting card.

With that in mind, and given the... strange art, I'm saying this is from Ravnica.

Jem Lightfoote, with an e, is one of the Atiin, as her flavor text implies. This is all we know about her, other than her being delightful and probably fun at parties.

Jolene Jolene, please don't go punching my man into space. This... hilarious card showcases New Capenna's premiere boxing tough knocking a guy directly out of his boots, while her horrifically photo-realistic snorse niss's menacingly behind her.

Fun fact: her magical gauntlets, which she still has and you can tell because you can see them around her fists, lets her literally punch money out of people! Every hit knocks some gold out of them, made from their blood and life.

This is directly referencing a magical item from some actual play DND podcast that I'm blanking on the name of. Maybe The Adventure Zone?

Kambal, once the Consul of Allocation of Ghirapur, in Kaladesh, was ousted from his position following the revolution, replaced with Pia, Chanra's mother. Despite losing all of his actual political power, his underworld connections didn't consume him for failure, and he survived past the Phyrexian Invasion to go on to becoming the corrupt mayor of Prosperity.

The art of him makes it look like he, as the kids these day say, is "serving cunt" and I kinda adore it.

Kellan's join up card. Thunder Junction.

And here is Kellan proper! The erstwhile hero of the "omenpath" saga of magic story, this is the first time since Eldraine that he's actually mattered in any real capacity! Here, he finally manifests the last of his birthright, the fae magics of Oko's plane, but in his heart he's still the little shepherd boy from Eldraine.

Kellan's story honestly concludes so well that I'll forgive the somewhat lackluster middle portion. He's a sweet and innocent and perfect soul. 0/10 villainy score.

Kraum is Ludevic's Opus, his perfect creation, the pinnacle of his mad stitching science. He's like two dudes connected together who can fly through electromagnetic powers. Mad scientists are silly.

I adore that Ludevic cares this much about his apprentice though. Kraum never shows up in story, which is probably for the best, but it's really funny to imagine every scene Geralf is in just has a two headed lightning crackling Frankenstein just, off in the distance watching him.

Jaspar Flint is, apparently, a Hellspur, which I can kinda see from the mutations on his hands and chest, so I suppose he's from Thunder Junction. But also there's no Viashino out there that look like desert lizards, so I do wonder where he's from... my best guess is actually Gastal, for some reason.

Lazav, successfully convincing everyone on Ravnica of his death in defense of the plane, has decided to go solo mode. So much for him and Tezzeret's plane to take over Ravnica- not that that'd ever come to fruit given it's from a book everyone hates.

I really love the art for this card.

Lilah is the leader of the Slickshots, and notably while she doesn't show up in the story proper, the secret to her and her gangs success does; a magical tincture only she can make, that empowers her and her allies with a little extra oomph to their magic.

The best way to identify a Slickshot is through their magic, and thte specific green magic she's launching out of a strange, heart-shaped bottle, suggests to me that she's actually a witch from Eldraine.

The flavor text, plus the make and model of the thunder-gun on our would-be gunfighter's side, suggests this is Atiin to me.

And that's a total of thirty! So lets take a quick break and go to part 2 momentarily!

[thenovelartist]

Life After Destruction - Chapter 9 - Honkai: Star Rail

<Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter>

In the first month of having their first child, there were many things that had changed. Dan Heng had thought he’d been prepared, but Welt had been right in one thing: all the information in the data bank couldn’t fully prepare him for being a father. Mostly because while he could read about babies all day long, actually handling Sirius as an individual required much adaptation on Dan Heng and Stelle’s part.

But that was fine. Dan Heng didn’t mind. Not even when Sirius woke them up and kept them up in the night.

At the moment, Sirius had finally finished his crying, having burped up whatever gas bubble had been hurting his stomach. Seemed like Dan Heng’s attempts at pacing around the room while lightly bouncing him had been successful considering Sirius was now calm as he rested against Dan Heng’s shoulder.

Dan Heng glanced over to Stelle as she sighed in relief. From her spot propped up against the headboard of their bed, she shot him a silent thumbs up, to which Dan Heng shot her back a relieved smile.

“Do you think he’ll fall back asleep now?” Stelle quietly asked.

“Hopefully,” he returned just as quietly.

“I would offer to take him from you to take turns—”

“No,” Dan Heng cut in, knowing what she was going to say. And while he appreciated the offer, he didn’t want to change any variables in this successful experiment at the moment.

She raised her hands in the air. “I know. Don’t mess with success.”

He continued to pace the room, although without the bouncing motions now in favor of slowly rubbing Sirius’ back. It would probably be a while yet until Sirius fell back asleep and Dan Heng could put him down. “You can go back to sleep,” Dan Heng offered. “He should be fine now.”

“I know,” she murmured. “I guess I’m just too awake to even try right now.”

Dan Heng understood what she meant. Long before he and Stelle had even started dating, they’d spent many nights awake together because of nightmares, too much adrenaline in their system to so much as lay down. It was in those long nights spent awake together that they’d grown close. Even after they’d married, there’d been plenty of nights one of them would wake the other up due to nightmares. But, one of the biggest blessings of their marriage was having someone to sleep next to, to stay with while weathering the panic of the nightmares, to fall back asleep beside. Surprisingly, both had learned how to get more sleep that way.

Hence, waking up to Sirius’s crying wasn’t as bad as either had thought. They were both too used to this pattern already. Of course, it wasn’t ideal, but with time, Sirius would stop waking up as frequently and eventually start sleeping through the night, allowing things to return to normal.

“He looks like he’s fading,” Stelle mentioned.

Dan Heng’s pace had slowed even more by now. He noticed Sirius’s blue eyes drifting closed as he began to nod off. If he wanted to push his luck, he could put Sirius down now, but he’d rather not.

A light smile came to Dan Heng’s lips as he looked at his son. That wispy silver hair promised to be as frazzled as Stelle’s, but those blue eyes were his, even down to the dusting of red at the corners of his eyelids. Those ears, too; ones that were pointed like every other one of his kind. His son was truly a vidyadhara through and through, and Dan Heng believed Sirius only grow into his draconic features the older he got.

After a moment, Dan Heng felt confident enough to put Sirius down in the little crib, one he and Stelle had received as a gift. Yes, they had the absolutely beautiful nursery that the Astral Express crew had given them, and they used it during the day. At night, however, it was far easier to have Sirius sleep in the room with them, the little crib set up close to the bed with a makeshift diaper station and necessity basket set up on the floor.

Seeing as Sirius didn’t wake after being placed down, Dan Heng walked back to the bed where Stelle welcomed him with open arms. After turning off the light, Dan Heng happily settled into her embrace, wrapping his arms around her in return. While he didn’t quite feel tired enough to fall back asleep, he could try, at least.

That is, if Stelle stopped playing with his ears.

“Something the matter?” he asked.

“No,” she returned, her voice light with amusement. “I just… think it’s cute to see you two with matching ears.”

Ah, yes. That was potentially the second biggest change since Sirius had been born, and it had nothing to do with Sirius himself. Before departing to the Luofu for Sirius’ birth, Dan Heng had every intention of changing back into his human appearance upon returning to the Astral Express. However, that was before Dan Heng saw Sirius’s ears. The two-day wait for the Astral Express to pick them up had given Dan Heng enough time to imagine what raising Sirius would be like. It had hit him then that there might come a time when the boy would start questioning his appearance if neither of his parents shared the prominent features he already exhibited, which forced Dan Heng to make a decision. A decision he was still struggling to adapt to.

“Are you okay seeing me like this? All the time, that is?” he asked Stelle for what was certainly not the first time.

Instead of answering right away, as she normally did, she slid her fingers down his cheek, her fingertips lightly running over his facial features before she tapped his nose. “What have I told you before?” she teased.

“That you don’t mind.”

“That you’re still Dan Heng, no matter what form you take,” she confirmed, her fingers continuing to ghost over his cheek and jaw. “But… I gotta say, I do like seeing my son look so much like his father.”

Those whispered words paired with her tender touch was just what Dan Heng needed to hear to settle down.

Although, she wound him up again when she pressed a slow, lingering kiss to his lips. “I love you.”

He smiled, his heart warm and worries completely evaporated now. “I love you, too.”

~~~

Two months postpartum, and Stelle was… not happy. Because darn it, she should be able to fit into her regular clothes by now!

Tossing her head back in irritation, she let out a long, angry groan. She was just about ready to throw in the towel on this. Just admit this baby had wrecked her body and call it a day. Sure, it was disappointing, but she had a miracle son with her husband to show for it, right?

… Right?

The door to their room opened, and Dan Heng slipped in. “Hey.”

Stelle whipped around, ready to take Sirius from Dan Heng’s arms. Only, Sirius wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

“Himeko has him,” Dan Heng answered before she could even ask.

“Oh.” Even after being married for years, she was occasionally caught off-guard with how well he could read her mind.

Dan Heng looked her over, his gaze lingering on her unzipped skirt. “I haven’t seen you wear that for a while.”

Stelle gave him a bitter smile. “Well, you’re not going to see me in it again.”

He quirked a brow at her.

In silent response, she once again tried to pull the top of the zipper together so she could zip it up, but it just didn’t fit no matter how hard she tried.

“…oh,” Dan Heng softly huffed.

With a grunt, she slid out of her skirt for the last time. “My hips widened out, and so it doesn’t fit properly now.” Out of frustration, she threw her skirt towards the bed, the opposite direction from the dresser. “Here I thought I was gonna be able to fit right back into my clothes once the baby bump disappeared, but apparently, I was wrong.”

She didn’t look toward Dan Heng. She didn’t dare. Not when she felt a little more emotional about it than she would have liked. Logically, she knew it wasn’t the end of the world. She was the kind to go with the flow pretty well, but this stung.

Before her mind could continue down its melancholy trail, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her from behind. The culprit didn’t speak; he only held her tightly and buried his head against her shoulder.

After a moment, Stelle relaxed into his embrace, fully leaning back against him as she placed her hands over his forearms.

“I’m sorry,” he began.

“For?”

He sighed, squeezing her tighter. “I… I know that growing a life took a toll on your body,” he said, words coming slowly as he chose them. “But I’m thankful beyond words for my son. So I don’t know what else I can say than that.”

It was her turn to sigh, his words and actions warming her heart and calming her anger. She was thankful for her son, too. It was just… with all the changes, she should be able to accept one more, but maybe this was the one that sent her over the edge instead.

“It’s fine,” she whispered, reaching up to cradle her husband’s cheek. “I’ll live. You don’t have to apologize.”

Dan Heng leaned into her touch. “I… No, I should.”

At that, she quirked a brow.

“Because I’m sorry… that I’m not sorry for accidentally…”

“Knocking me up?” she finished.

He sighed. “Yes. Especially since that should have been impossible.”

Yet, by some miracle, it had happened and left them with a child, one Stelle was genuinely excited about and thankful for. It was thoughts like those that made her realize just how stupid her complaints over her hips were, yet she couldn’t distance herself from her emotions just yet.

“I’m not mad at you,” Stelle assured. Taking a deep breath, she leaned fully back against him, relishing the feel of just being held by Dan Heng. “I remember talking about kids with you before that night. Remember seeing the kids running down the street and causing trouble.”

Dan Heng chuckled. “I remember that. That… was the first time I really started thinking about families in general.”

“Same for me,” she admitted. “What I didn’t tell you was how I was almost… a little jealous.”

“Jealous?”

She nodded, thinking back to that date night. “I meant it when I said I’d never really thought about a family with you before. But after our date, I started to wonder what it would be like to be a normal couple with you. To have a family and a home and whatnot. After our lives being so chaotic and never being able to think beyond the moment, I finally had time to wonder what it would be like to slow down; to not have one crazy thing after another happen.”

She slowly turned around in Dan Heng’s arms so that she could face him. “So it’s fine. I’ll get over the hip thing. Just… give me a little time.”

His arms wrapped around her waist, low as though to purposefully grab her hips and pull her flush against him. “If it makes you feel better, I still think you’re beautiful as ever, wider hips or not.”

Despite herself, she smirked. “You’d say that no matter what.”

“I mean it." Sincerity shone in his eyes, ones far bluer than she was used to yet adapted to with shocking speed. 

Ones that still made her heart flutter no matter what color they were. “I know.”

“Would you like for me to go shopping with you when the others return?” he offered. “To get new clothes that fit?”

Stelle shrugged, playing off how happy his offer had made her. “It’s fine. I’ll ask March. As much as I complain about shopping with her, those trips end up being more productive than when I’m alone.” That is… when March could focus and not get sidetracked. Two eyes searching through clothes made for quicker work as opposed to one, especially when one of those eyes had good taste in fashion.

“Okay.” He then pressed a kiss to her temple. “Then I’ll leave it to March.”

“Thank you for the offer, though,” she said, unable to ignore the warm-fuzzy feeling that had yet to go away. “I love you.”

He smiled, leaning forward. “I love you, too.” He pressed his lips to hers in a lingering kiss.

She couldn't help but grin against his lips, enjoying the moment.

“And no matter how your body changes,” he continued, his lips moving against hers. “I will still only love you.”

Her cheeks grew warm. “You need to stop,” she whispered in warning.

His brow furrowed, his body instantly freezing in worry. “What?”

“You can’t keep flirting with me like that and expect me not to swoon.”

She felt his body melt as he relaxed. Only this time, it was paired with an amused gleam in his blue eyes. “I’m not trying to flirt.”

“Still. It’s not fair.”

“How so?”

She didn’t have an answer for that. At least… not one she wanted to admit aloud.

His grip on her grew tighter as he waited.

So she just kissed him instead.

A chuckle escaped him. He’d seemed to expect her action. But in return, his hands slid slowly up her back, wrapping her fully up in his embrace. Her skin tingled with lightning at his touch, something sparking to life in her that hadn’t been lit in months. And that warm, buzzing sensation coaxed her to follow his lead as he dipped her back.

“Now, I’m flirting,” he said, the tips of his ears growing red at the admission.

… Drat it all, this was going to end one way, wasn’t it? That part of her that burned for the first time in months was screaming in eagerness, but her mind wouldn’t turn off “Mom-Mode” quite yet. “Sirius,” she breathily began. “What about—”

“He’s fine,” Dan Heng interrupted. “I think Himeko knew what she was doing when she asked to take him.”

Stelle felt her cheeks burn. Himeko, for some reason, just knew things Stelle would rather she didn’t. By no means was she classless or lewd, but she always seemed to know when the married couple aboard her star train needed a date night out or some private time. Not for the first time did Stelle wonder if she should confront Himeko or just buy the woman a thank-you gift.

Ugh, maybe the latter because she and Dan Heng hadn’t done anything in months and Stelle didn’t realize just how desperately she was missing her husband.

“Uh, b-be patient with me,” she asked, a new round of heat flooding her body, burning in her chest as her heart raced.

“Because it’s been a while?” Dan Heng asked.

“Because… it’s our first time since I pushed a baby out through these ruined hips—”

“They aren’t ruined.”

“Okay, but still! It might… be different. Or so I was warned.”

Dan Heng pulled his head back to meet her gaze. Those glowing eyes burned with an intensity that made Stelle feel small, as though she was truly at the mercy of a great dragon. Yet instead of the urge to cower in fear, as any sensible person would, she was doing her best not to swoon. “I’m not in this relationship for sex,” he clarified. “I’m in this relationship for you.”

Her heartbeat was growing more noticeable by the second, banging like a drum as her breath came in rapid pants.

“It just so happens that… with you is… amazing.” He cleared his throat, his ears turning redder. “So it doesn’t matter to me if it’s different. Whatever you need from me now, tell me. I’ll comply.”

Geez, with an answer like that, what else was she supposed to do except let him have his way with her?

So she caved. Happily and eagerly.

She just didn’t expect to be left absolutely exhausted on their bed, half-wrapped in the tangled sheet and sporting bite marks all up and down her hips. Behind her, Dan Heng had his face nuzzled into her shoulder, allowing her to feel the smile on his face as he spooned her. 

She couldn’t be upset at whatever pride he’d gleaned from their escapade, not when he once again lavished attention on her insecurities until they disappeared from her mind, if only for a bit. He may have become much more talkative with her over the years, the two of them learning how to communicate well with each other, yet he never stopped being a man of action when it counted.

Pushing back against him, she snuggled deeper against him and rested her hand on top of his. One thing was for certain: Stelle was a very lucky woman. And considering he liked making his love to her known by frequently leaving his mark, he never gave her the chance to forget it.

~~~

Dan Heng was very conflicted.

This was the third time Stelle had kicked Dan Heng out to be on the mission exploration team since Sirius was born. Her reasoning equated to “it was good for him to get out,” but Dan Heng didn’t like having to leave Stelle alone for days on end while he got himself into who-knew-what with whatever stellaron crisis they’d stumbled upon. Raising a baby was a team effort, and he didn’t like having to dump all the responsibility for several days while he was out and about. She warned him that normal couples would see the father off to work, leaving most of the care to the mother in that time, but Dan Heng argued that even in that situation, the father would return home for the evening, unlike him.

Of course, he couldn't win that argument when Welt and Himeko backed Stelle up. Hence, he was forcibly removed from Astral Express guard duty.

The problem came when he got out, stretched his legs a little bit, realized he didn’t have to deal with diaper changes for a couple days, and enjoyed being away for a bit. It never did take long for the guilt to set in. He tried not to focus on it too much and rather focus on completing this mission efficiently and quickly, but with the way it was going, they were going to be here a while.

At the moment, Dan Heng was in his hotel room, one provided by the city as they traveled, reading on his phone. It was the middle hours of the night, but Dan Heng just couldn’t get to sleep. Ever since he and Stelle had started sharing a bed, he’d found it easier to fall asleep. Now, alone with his thoughts in this unfamiliar bedroom, lounging on a bed that wasn’t nearly as comfortable as the one back home, Dan Heng just could not find the ability to sleep. Hence, he dove into research.

Until a message woke him up.

Stelle: I hope this doesn’t wake you. I just want to say I miss you. As does Little Dragon. 

Dan Heng: I was awake. Can’t sleep without you.

Stelle: :( I’m sorry. I wish I was there with you.

Dan Heng: Can I call you? 

Dan Heng: Or is Little Dragon asleep?

The moment he sent off that message, his phone buzzed with an incoming call. One he answered immediately. “Hey.”

“Hey,” his clearly tired wife greeted from the other end of the line. “How’s everything going?”

Dan Heng sighed. “It’s… going.”

“That sounds really promising,” she sarcastically retorted.

Dan Heng huffed a laugh. “How are you?”

“Meh, nothing to report. Baby was a little upset that I was the one rocking him to sleep tonight. You’re spoiling him.”

“Then I should sit the next mission out.”

“I won’t argue with the next mission, but I’m still kicking you out every once in a while.”

“I should offer to take him and send you out.”

Stelle paused.

“Maybe not the next mission,” Dan Heng said. “But one in the near future. I think you need to get out again, too.”

“I… I’d like that. I think I’m a little more out of shape than I realize.”

“You’re doing well to work towards it again.” The image of Stelle doing sprints up and down the train cars crossed his mind. He also remembered secretly asking Pom-pom not to yell at her for wearing out the carpet. “If you’d like, we can start sparring sessions.”

“Ugh. I mean, yeah, it would help me shake the rust off my lance, but I’m worried you’re going to hand me my butt on a silver platter.”

“I’ll go easy on you.”

“Not too easy.”

“Not enough to cause you a disservice.”

She chuckled. “You know, now that I think about it, I don’t think I would mind not having to change a diaper for a few days.”

A humored huff escaped him. “I… may have thought the same thing.”

“Can’t blame you. However, we’re off-topic. What’s happening on your end?”

For the next half hour, they lost themselves in conversation. Hearing her voice helped settle him more than any other sleep tactic he’d tried. But he could hear her yawn over the phone more than once and knew he couldn’t keep her.

“I should let you get back to sleep,” he said.

“It’s fine,” Stelle assured. “I was awake before Sirius started fussing. But he’s asleep now so maybe I should try to get a nap in while I can.”

“Then go,” Dan Heng said. “I’m glad I got to hear your voice.”

She hummed, her tone warm as she replied, “Same.”

“Then good night.”

“Good morning, you mean.”

He smirked. “Good morning. Get some sleep.”

“You, too. Love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“And good luck on your mission.”

“We need all the luck we can get.”

She hummed, although it sounded a bit like a chuckle. “Bye.”

“See you soon.”

With that, the call dropped, and Dan Heng was left with almost a twinge of disappointment. Getting out was nice, but he’d at least like to spend his nights at home. He got about the same amount of sleep either way.

Dropping his phone back on the nightstand, he decided to give sleep one more try. Although it was so light that he awoke with the first hint of dawn creeping into his room, it was still better than nothing.

Dan Heng: Good morning. I hope I don’t wake you. I hope you have a good day.

Before he could put his phone down, he noticed the bubbles on the other line.

Stelle: Good morning. And good luck. ;)

With a smile, Dan Heng slowly slipped out of bed. Time to make as much headway as possible and get home as quickly as he could. He’d take diapers over sleepless nights and stellaron disasters any day.

~~~

Stelle hated being this rusty. She’d been out of the field for way too long. And of course, her first mission back had to be a complete and total disaster.

At least she didn’t look that out of shape when compared to the huffing Welt and worn-out Caelus by her side. Actually, the worn-out Caelus worried her the most considering he was in the best shape of the three of them. But then again, maybe he was like that because he was carrying most of the slack.

Stelle hated this.

Still, she pushed herself past what she thought was her breaking point, trying to evacuate the city from the spreading corruption caused by the stellaron while holding a lost, crying child in her arms.

Stelle hated a lot of things, but this she hated the most.

Finally in the safe zone, her knees threatening to fail her, she searched for someone to hand the young child off to, only to see a teary-eyed woman running towards her. “My baby!”

Relief flooded Stelle as she handed the child over to the mother.

“Thank you,” the woman said, sounding much like a broken record as she hugged her child tightly to her. “Thank you. Thank you.”

“I’m a mother, too,” Stelle said, although a bit breathlessly. “I get it.”

The woman looked up at her with shining eyes. “You’re an angel.”

In the past, Stelle had helped countless people of all ages. Of course, she understood people were appreciative, and she was always happy to be rewarded, but this time… this time felt a little more personal than she would have liked.

Taking a moment to catch her breath—as well as mentally beg her legs to stop shaking—she rallied herself for one last push to finish this up. All she wanted to do was go back home and hug her own baby, one who was thankfully safe and sound away from this disaster.

Move, Stelle, she chastized when her legs had a hard time starting.

Finally, after aeons-knew-how-long, the mess was over, and Welt had properly contained the stellaron.

Upon hearing that wonderful piece of news, Stelle’s legs officially gave out on her, and she collapsed to the ground.

“Don’t move me,” she muttered to Welt. “Let me die here for a minute.”

What she hadn’t expected was Welt to drop to the ground beside her. “No… no judgment here.”

A shadow then fell over Stelle, and she cracked her eyes open to see Caelus hovering over them. “You got it?” he asked.

Welt gave him a thumbs up. “Got it.”

At which point Caelus dramatically collapsed to the ground. “Good.”

Well, Stelle really didn’t feel so out of shape now.

“I’m confident… that I speak for all of us,” Caelus began, “when I say… we sit the next two missions out.”

Welt heaved a breath. “I do not object.”

“I’m sitting more than that!” Stelle whined.

Caelus huffed a chuckle.

“If it makes you feel better,” Welt huffed out. “You did incredibly well for your first mission in a year.”

That got Stelle to pause. Had it been almost a year since she was last out in the field. Although tired, she did some mental math. She'd had a couple light missions after discovering her pregnancy, but by the time she hit month five, she was out. Sirius had just hit seven months old. So just under a year. It had taken that long to not only get back in shape enough to actually help properly during these missions but also to feel comfortable leaving Sirius for a few days. Dan Heng was more capable of picking up her slack, to be sure, but she didn't quite count on her sheer unwillingness to leave. 

"Wow. What a year." She murmured to herself before realizing she should respond to Welt. “Thanks. I thought I missed it, but let me tell you, diapers have their appeal.”

Caelus propped himself up, just enough to meet her gaze. “You know, had you said that before, I would have mocked you. But I swear to aeons, I now understand the appeal of poop and vomit when compared to… that.”

Stelle couldn’t help but chuckle.

“By the way,” Caelus said, rolling over to lay flat on the ground again. “We’re not gonna move for the next ten minutes, right?”

“No,” Welt confirmed.

“Good.”

~~~

Dan Heng liked days like today: calm, recently finished mission, everyone home in the Express. These days held a certain peace to them; ironic considering the parlor was full with everyone aboard.

On one bench sat March and Caelus, the duo rather close as they chatted. March was showing off photos she’d taken of their past adventures while Caelus told her of his own adventures on whatever planet was in her pictures.

Stelle also sat on that couch, but on the opposite end, bouncing Sirius on her knee. However, the toddler who’d recently had his first birthday was looking over at the other couch with a longing pout. Amused, Stelle put Sirius on the floor, where he instantly turned happy as he scrambled to where his father sat.

With a smile, Dan Heng reached out for Sirius, grabbing him when he came close and pulling him into his own lap. Beside him, Himeko and Welt smiled upon the scene.

“He’s getting so fast!” Pom-pom commented, walking over to Dan Heng.

“I'm scared he’s going to be hard to keep up with,” Stelle said, crossing her legs and propping her elbow on her knee. Since replacing her skirts, she’d exchanged her mini-skirts for knee-length ones. In Dan Heng’s opinion, he liked this change. It gave her a slightly more mature air, which felt very apropos for her change into motherhood. Although they still had a thigh-high slit that showed off her signature teal garter, one that she'd previously mentioned was the same color as his eyes. Dan Heng quite liked that little detail, too.

“At this rate,” Dan Heng replied, putting Sirius back down on the ground. “I am worried about when he starts walking.”

“He’s almost there,” Stelle wistfully said.

Yes, and it was… almost a shame. It felt like just yesterday, Sirius was waking them up every two hours on the dot. Now, here he was, using Dan Heng’s legs as support to stand on his own.

“Good job,” he quietly encouraged as the little boy looked up to him with a smile.

Sirius let out a little, happy squeak of excitement, moving his hands to clap, although he only managed to clap twice before falling over off-balance. However, instead of getting upset, he simply rolled onto all fours and scrambled right back across the room to Stelle. Pom-pom, the ever-watchful conductor, followed right behind.

With a smile, Dan Heng watched as Sirius stood once again, this time using Stelle’s hands as support. Once he seemed to get his balance, Stelle moved her hands away, letting the boy stand on his own.

“Yay!” she quietly cheered, clapping her hands.

In his excitement, Sirius tried to mimic the gesture but flailed around too much and quickly lost his balance after one clap.

“Aww,” Caelus cooed, hopping up off the couch to skip over to him. “You did so good.”

In one smooth motion, Caelus swept Sirius up off the floor, lightly tossing him in the air before settling the boy against his hip. Sirius instantly brightened, squealing his excitement at his uncle’s playful attention.

In the next second, March was by him. She tickled Sirius’s sides from behind, causing the toddler to giggle and squeal even more.

“One would think they’re the parents,” Himeko whispered conspiratorially to Dan Heng.

Not for the first time did Dan Heng really examine the interactions between the duo. Since boarding the express, Caelus had integrated surprisingly quickly into the crew. He and Stelle had grown quite close, and the more their bond deepened, the clearer it became to everyone just how similar the duo were as siblings. Caelus might be a little more chaotic than Stelle, but Dan Heng would chalk that up to the fact he was a solo stellaron hunter for years. Or maybe that was just his personality.

Either way, Dan Heng himself couldn’t deny he’d appreciated the comfortable friendship he’d formed with the new male member. In fact, he’d learned to enjoy the time he got to trailblaze with Caelus. He’d ignore the fact he’d had to pull Caelus away from a couple of trashcans on their adventures, though. That just felt par for the course by now.

As for Caelus’ relationship with the other members, though, the one most notable was the one with March. They’d gone from constantly ribbing each other—which was fine by Dan Heng; he appreciated that March had someone else to bother rather than him or Stelle all the time—to practically being attached at the hip. Dan Heng wouldn’t say he had the best eye for social interactions, but even he wondered if their relationship would grow past a friendship.

“I agree they are quite close.”

Himeko hummed. “One of these days, I expect them to confess to us that they’re dating. After all, you and Stelle once looked like that.”

Dan Heng felt his ears warm. “Did… we really?”

With a smile, Himeko nodded. “It was adorable, though.”

That only made the warmth in Dan Heng’s cheeks intensify. He coughed in hopes of covering his embarrassment. “Hopefully, our relationship didn’t cause any issues we did not intend.”

Welt shook his head. “You two weren’t running into that relationship irrationally. It was evident that it had been growing for some time.”

“So we felt it was more an inevitability than an issue,” Himeko finished. “And I feel the same about those two.”

By now, the duo had handed Sirius off to Stelle. Sirius was standing on his own using Stelle’s hands as support. This time, when Stelle took her hands away to let him stand on his own, he bounced a couple times excitedly before falling.

The sight caused the heat in his face to channel down to his heart. His little boy was getting closer to being able to walk. Dan Heng just hoped he was around to see Sirius’s first steps instead of off on some trailblazing mission.

“Maybe,” Himeko quietly continued. “Given some time, Sirius won’t be the only baby aboard the Express.”

“Don’t let your imagination run too wild,” Welt gently chastised.

“March has too strong of a twinkle in her eye when she looks at Sirius for me to do that.”

Welt simply sighed. “Maybe it’s more appropriate to say ‘Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.’”

Himeko shrugged as she sipped her coffee.

Dan Heng quirked a brow at them. “Um… would you two be okay with that? Er... I mean, allow me to rephrase: are you… really okay with having kids aboard?”

Himeko set her coffee cup down as she thought. “I won’t say it’s easy. Having a baby around is a challenge with this lifestyle. But we like having you and Stelle around, so we were able to make things work to keep you both aboard. Plus, Sirius is adorable. I wouldn’t mind—that is, if Caelus and March did get married—if they started a family, too. With Sirius under our belt, we’d all be able to adapt to it quicker.”

Upon Dan Heng looking towards the older man for an answer, Welt provided, “I feel as though I’ve known you all long enough to confidently say this: trailblazing has become an integral part of your lives. I can’t see any of you happy anywhere else. And even though this life is different than what could be considered ‘normal’, I would hate to see you youngsters put your lives on hold for this. You and Stelle have proven you were able to build a family in the middle of this, however unintentional it may have been. I’m happy to be able to watch you both. It… now, this may be odd to say, but Sirius makes the Express feel… even more like a home.”

“It’s not odd in the slightest,” Himeko agreed.

It might sound the most odd coming from Dan Heng, but he also understood the sentiment. Having grown up in a prison, being hated from the moment he was reincarnated, and eventually forced into exile, he’d never known a home. It was not a concept he had the luxury of understanding until Stelle had come into his life and settled down with him. She didn’t exactly have a great idea of what ‘home’ meant, either, but she was the first to call what they’d built a home, even though she'd only been referring to their marriage and shared room at the time. Now, with Sirius in the mix—

“Dan Heng!”

Broken from his thoughts, Dan Heng turned towards Stelle’s call. She was standing in the middle of the room, bent over to hold Sirius’s hand in support as he toddled towards Dan Heng.

Instinctually, Dan Heng slid off his seat to his knees, reaching forward towards his son. With how little Stelle was actually supporting him, maybe Sirius could walk on his own this time. “Come on.”

A smile took the place of Sirius’s previous intense concentration, and he let go of Stelle’s hand. He took one very shaky step followed by steps two and three in quick succession before he fell forward, but Dan Heng quickly caught him, scooping him up into his arms.

“Good job, Little Dragon,” he said, tightly hugging his son. His words, however, were muted by everyone’s cheers. March even interjected that she’d caught it on camera.

Turning to Stelle, who now stood in front of him, they shared a smile. Yes, this was home, a safe place he shared with his wife, son, and the rest of his family. Unlike his father, Sirius would never know the pain of chains in a prison or be lacking in love. The Astral Express would be the place he grew up, where he was free to travel the stars, and surrounded by family. Dan Heng and Stelle may not have grown up knowing what a home was, but Sirius would never know anything but, and Dan Heng could not be any more grateful for that than he already was.

[savemefromanepicoftimewasted]

The Angels Are Not Ready For You Pt. 1

Joel Miller X F!Reader

Joel couldn’t let Ellie know things were going catastrophically, lest he have her start worrying even more. Shit, Joel was most likely going to end up staying awake to make sure you didn’t die throughout the night. Then again it wouldn’t be the first time someone had died on Joel’s watch. a/n:I've had this fic in my docs for MONTHS, and honestly it might be one of my personal favorites, as always feedback is much appreciated! warnings:mentions of violence, gore, near death experiences, blood, mentions of stab wounds, if i missed anything please let me know!

You were running, adrenaline pumping through your veins as you tried to escape being murdered by the goddamn teenager that managed to get the upper hand on you. It wasn’t as if you were acting like an idiot when the two of you crossed paths, she just happened to have a better knife. The wound in your side had been bleeding profusely, and if you didn’t make it back to your safe zone you would surely be dying on the side of the road. She’d managed to get all of the food you scavenged, over three months worth of food absolutely gone in the blink of an eye because you were too stupid. The blood loss was suddenly making you woozy, shit this meant you wouldn’t be able to keep going unless you finally took a look at the wound.

“Just gotta patch myself up, then I can keep going,” You had originally been running because of hunters nearby, but getting stabbed because a kid got the better of you really took the cake for shittiest day imaginable.

You turned towards one of the closest houses, hoping and praying there weren’t any clickers inside roaming around the barren bones of it. Luck seemed to finally be on your side as you stepped inside and it was completely silent. Hunters tended to stalk houses like this which made hiding from them even harder. Dropping your bag onto the floor you slowly peeled up your shirt grimacing at how sticky your shirt had become. This was how you were going to die, not by a clicker or a hunter but by a kid looking to steal your food.

“Shit,” Blood was pouring down your side, soaking into the waist of your jeans as you tried and failed to slow the bleeding.

What if the girl was with those hunters and they were now on the way to find you so they could finish you off? It wouldn’t be a quick and painless death, there was no way any man would willingly let you live without causing some of the most horrific pain to your body first. God this day couldn’t get any damn worse. With a grunt and a drawn out sigh you bandaged up the wound as best you could given the circumstances. If you could keep it from getting infected over the next few days you would be fine, just need to ride out the worst of the pain. 

Ellie wasn’t sure how Joel would react to seeing the pack of food she’d stolen from one of the hunters, considering how she’d managed to snag it while the other person was struggling to gain their footing. They were making their way back to Tommy’s compound to see if there was any chance they would be allowed to stay. There wasn’t a doubt in Ellie’s mind that Tommy wouldn’t welcome them with open arms, the brothers had gone too long without seeing one another for things to end badly.

“Hey, I managed to find some food earlier, should be enough to feed us for a while,” Ellie wasn’t going to mention how she got it, lest Joel freak out about her nearly getting killed by someone.

Joel’s head snapped up at the mention of food, it had been nearly a week since the pair had been able to eat anything remotely filling so the promise of food was a godsend. They could settle down to eat something and make the rest of the trek to Tommy’s place. It was still at least another ten miles before they reached the compound, and heading out on a full belly was much better than an empty one.

“Why don’t we find somewhere to make camp for the night and we’ll eat, that way we can keep guard in case,” Joel was looking around at the surrounding buildings, surely there was something closed off enough where they could sleep.

Ellie pointed over to one of the abandoned houses that was nearby, the windows hadn’t been broken which was a good sign that no infected were inside. He nodded his head and they both headed off to inspect the building thoroughly. There was nothing worse than assuming you were safe and having some asshole sneak up on you. There hadn’t been many instances on the way back to Jackson, something Joel was thankful for every day they traveled. Joel went into the house first, gun held tight in his right hand while his left held onto the flashlight.

He was about to yell back towards Ellie, to let her know that it was safe inside and there weren’t any hunters or infected hanging around. That was until he caught sight of a woman huddling down in the kitchen. Shit that meant the hungers were outsmarting him and nearly able to get the jump on both he and Ellie without either of them realizing til it was too late. He’d have to take care of them without Ellie realizing what he was up to.

Tiptoeing out towards the kitchen Joel rounded the kitchen island, gun drawn high as he stared down at the woman by his feet. His throat seemed to tighten, there was no way in hell that you were sitting in front of him, hand clutching your side as you stared back at him. Ellie apparently had gotten annoyed with Joel being too quiet and made her presence known. Your head whipped to where she’d stopped, fear was written all over your face. Had the two of you met and Joel was unaware?

“Please, just let me go,” You pushed away from the pair, ignoring the searing pain in your side as you stared back at the man you’d loved so long ago.

“Hey, we’re not gonna hurt ya, why don’t you come back with us?” Joel knelt down, holding out his left hand, the right currently held back towards Ellie so she wouldn’t come any closer.

Neither Ellie, nor Joel could say anything before you were off the floor and out the back door. You were determined to get somewhere safe, somewhere you could hide without the fear of being murdered. Joel didn’t hesitate to take off after you, yelling your name as you ran into a nearby building. Joel was internally cursing his knees for being so weak as he took off after you, he needed to catch up to you before you reached the school. That place was crawling with clickers, and the occasional stalker in the empty building.

“Y/N!” Joel halted to a stop the moment his body slammed into the doors you’d managed to slip through. 

There were no less than five clickers standing around the open gym in front of him, shit there was no way either of you were going to survive in this room for very long. Ellie nearly slammed into his back, stopping just seconds before colliding against the older man. Joel could just barely make out your silhouette, your hand was still clutching your side, your skin stained an ugly red. There was something about your face that brought back memories he’d thought were long since buried. Ellie was already making her way over to you, stilling in place whenever a clicker even so much as glanced towards the two of you. 

Joel wanted to yell at her that this was something beyond reckless and the three of you needed to get out of there as soon as possible. They would be much safer where it was easier to see their enemies, and right now that wasn’t the damn case. Tears were streaming down your face as Ellie finally reached where’d been trying to hide. She didn’t say a word, simply held a finger up to her lips before turning back towards Joel and making her way back. You followed slowly behind her, making sure to avoid anything on the floor that would give you both away. Joel had been holding his breath the entire time, afraid that if he breathed too hard it would alert every single clicker.

Joel held the doors as you and Ellie made your exit, he let go of the doors slowly to avoid them clanging together and gathering the attention of the clickers. Had there been hunters inside he’d have done this differently and let the doors slam loud enough to make sure no one else made it out alive. That wasn’t the current case though, and Joel wasn’t as heartless as he made himself out to be.

“Please let me go, you can have the fucking food,” Your hands had begun to shake uncontrollably, this was the beginning of the end for you.

“Food? Wait, Ellie is this who you got the food from?” Joel spun around to stare down the teenager.

“I thought she was with those hunters!” Ellie threw her hands up, refusing to take responsibility for protecting herself.

Joel could understand where she was coming from, though it didn’t settle the pit that was currently lodged in his stomach. He turned back to where you were trying, and struggling, to keep yourself upright. You’d clearly lost a lot of blood if the amount spread across your torso was any indication. He wouldn’t have much time to get you stitched up if they continued to wait any longer.

“We have a camp nearby, at least let me patch you up,” Joel wasn’t sure you’d recognized him, you hadn’t mentioned anything since he yelled your name earlier.

“I’m really sorry about stabbing you, it’s been a long year and I wasn’t sure I could trust you,” Ellie didn’t apologize easily, not after what happened at the hospital.

Joel hadn’t wanted to tell her the truth, to keep that lie buried so deep inside his chest it would never see the light of day again, unfortunately that was never the case. Unfortunately life had another idea when it came to Joel’s life and happiness. Ellie hadn’t spoken to him for months after she found out, blaming Joel for taking away her choice in the matter. Things were still tense, but at least the pair of them could have a civil conversation without the other lashing out. Unfortunately that didn’t seem to be the case with the three of you sitting together in a circle, Ellie was watching Joel like a hawk.

“I always knew you’d find a way to survive in this hellhole we call our new normal,” You didn’t give any fight when Joel wrapped his arm around you.

“I could say the same thing about you, you always refused to back down no matter what it took,” Joel had thought of you all the time, wondering if you had managed to survive the way he had.

Had you joined a group of hunters, or were you one of the lucky people that traveled alone to attract less attention? How could he even bring up the things he’d done in his past knowing he’d left you behind, breaking off that bond like it meant absolutely nothing to him. The two of you had met in the Boston QZ a few years after Joel had arrived, Tommy running off to join the fireflies like a damn moron. He couldn’t fault his brother for that though, he wanted to make a difference in the world.

“I left the QZ a few months after you did, they were killing so many innocent people and I just couldn’t keep wondering if I’d be the next victim,” You’d watched so many people you once called friends be murdered in the streets, it was sickening.

Joel kept his mouth shut, he couldn’t imagine how much worse the QZ could get after witnessing the horrors he had for so long. Children meant absolutely nothing to the Fedra soldiers, the bodies turning into ash by the end of the day. He thought of Sarah each and every time he picked up a body that was too small to be burned, her body still buried in Texas. You’d mentioned your brother once or twice to Joel, quickly changing the subject after a few brief words. Kids were always going to be a sore topic that no one wanted to touch, and now with him taking care of Ellie he kept that box sealed tight.

“We’re actually heading back to see my brother, he’s got himself a nice little compound about ten miles west,” Joel wasn’t even sure you could make it another hundred yards in your condition, but dammit he wasn’t about to lose someone else he’d cared about.

“How’s he doing? Haven’t seen him since he took off after Marlene gave him that ultimatum,” You were resting almost all of your weight against Joel’s side, fingers barely grasping onto the fabric of his shirt.

“He’s doing pretty well for himself all things considered, I’ll make sure the two of you can catch up,” Joel ignored the flutter in his stomach, thinking about you coming back to the compound with him and Ellie.

Ellie was oddly quiet beside you and Joel, hands tucked into the pockets of her hoodie as if she was afraid to speak up anymore. Joel knew she was simply trying to protect herself, lord knows they’d had to do it more often than either of them were proud of. Joel was silently thankful she never had to witness what he’d done at the hospital, it was either him or them. What if Ellie was going to tell you everything he’d done in the last few months? Killing anyone who so much as tried to step on his toes. Would you forgive him for his past actions, or would you realize what a monster he truly was deep down?

“Joel, I think we need to stop for the night,” Joel wanted to ask why Ellie seemed so nervous before he realized why, you were dead weight against him, legs dragging as he stumbled towards the safe house.

“Shit, Ellie go ahead and make sure the house is clear,” Time was running out and goddamnit he wasn’t about to bury someone else.

Reaching down to hoist you into his arms Joel’s anxiety began to rise, your breathing was shallow and harsh. He’d known about what happened but how deep had Ellie cut you? Maybe once they got back to Tommy’s he could see if there was a nurse, or a doctor to help. He wasn’t as spry as he’d once been, and right now he was struggling to even carry you to the house. Shit, this was going to be a long damn day and Joel wasn’t ready to deal with any of the consequences right now.

“It’s clear!” Ellie knew that any type of noise would attract the wrong kind of attention, even if Joel was beyond caring at this point he knew better than to yell back.

Joel laid you down onto the couch the moment everyone was inside, checking over the wound that hadn’t started to clot. He ripped open his pack, reaching for a rag to help staunch the blood that was slowly dripping down your side. Ellie was silently freaking out behind him, gathering up anything she could that could help. Joel could only hope that Ellie had managed to miss any vital organs when she stabbed you.

“C’mon, see if you can wake her so we can get some food and water in ‘er,” Joel would deny any accusation that he’d begun to panic, Joel Miller did not panic.

“I’m really sorry Joel,” Her hands were shaking almost violently, the same girl who could handle a rifle almost perfectly was scared.

Joel didn’t put any of his attention towards Ellie, there wasn’t anything he could say without sounding angry. He’d done enough emotional damage to the teenager as it was, right now they needed to focus on making sure you were alright. Blood was soaking through the rag faster than Joel could stop it. He’d lost so many people, Sarah, Tess, Frank and Bill, had nearly lost Ellie more times than he’d been able to keep track of.

“C’mon baby, I know you can keep fighting,” Joel refused to look at his hands, the way your blood was caked between the lines of his fingers.

“Let me stitch her up, it’ll stop the bleeding for now,” Ellie was by his side in a matter of seconds, startling him for a brief moment before his eyes locked on her.

It would be a risky move to take the pressure off your wound, but without closing the wound you’d surely bleed out before they could help you. Joel slowly lifted the rag frowning at how big the wound seemed to be. Ellie must’ve snuck a new knife the last time they’d been able to stock up on supplies. It had been a near jackpot with how much they’d been able to grab and throw into their packs. Food had been the only issue when it came to their adventure back to Tommy’s commune, and right now he wasn’t sure the food Elle had attempted to steal from you was worth it. Back to the point at hand, making sure you didn’t bleed out while Ellie stitched up your wound. She’d had to stitch Joel back when he was stabbed last winter, taking care of him to make sure he didn’t succumb to the warm embrace of death.

Your skin was covered in a light sheen of sweat, hands shaking slightly as you laid otherwise limp against the couch. The next best thing would be to get some medicine and food in you, the wound couldn’t get infected no matter what. Joel brushed a few strands of hair away from your face, checking to make sure you weren’t hurt besides the obvious wound.

“Do you think they’ll make it to Tommy’s?” Ellie had learned to bury her fear deep down, not letting anyone know how scared she truly was. Not after Sam.

“As long as she stays stable through the night we’ll be fine,” Joel wasn’t entirely sure whether or not you were even going to survive the next few hours.

It was going to be a waiting game for the next twelve hours, if you couldn’t fight to survive you’d be just another unmarked grave along the way. Thankfully the weather was warm enough that they wouldn’t need to keep you covered with blankets to stave off the cold, Joel knew all too well how horrible that was.

“I’m going to scour the area a little more, keep an eye and make sure nothing happens to her please,” Joel kept his gaze on Ellie, he knew the moment he so much as glanced at you he’d refuse to leave the safety of the house.

Ellie nodded at him, cleaning around your wound before taping gauze around it with the little supplies they had left. She put most of the blame on herself, had she just grabbed your bag and ran none of this would’ve happened and Joel wouldn’t be paranoid. Things had been going fine for so long, why the hell did this have to happen? If you died Joel wouldn’t forgive her at all, not after seeing the way Joel looked at you when he thought she wasn’t aware. Your eyes were fluttering behind closed lids, shit what if you were having a nightmare and ended up thrashing to the point the stitches ripped?

Before Ellie could open her mouth to yell for Joel your hand clamped over her mouth, silencing her entirely. She didn’t fight back, your wound had to have been screaming in pain as you kept a tight grip on the teenager. Shit what if Joel came back inside and thought you’d been infected and managed to turn when his back was turned?

“Where is he?” Your voice was weak, strength waning as you waited for Joel to come back inside.

“He’s doing patrol, does it everyday to make sure we’re safe,” Ellie was truly terrified in that moment, how much longer would she be in this position?

“Shit, of course he does,” You could vaguely remember the way Joel had hardly slept at times, too paranoid that Fedra would be busting down the door to take you away.

Right at that moment Joel stepped back inside, eyes locking on the way you were clutching onto Ellie. Well this wasn’t what he’d hoped to come back inside to, but life hadn’t been kind to him in a long while.

“Hey, just let go of her and we can talk,” Joel knelt down slowly, he was getting too old to do any of this.

Your arms eased off of Ellie slowly, wincing as she brushed against your side to get back to the safety that was Joel’s back. He knew you wouldn’t be able to properly fight off any kind of attack but it didn’t put him at ease either way. Why had you gone after Ellie when they’d just gotten you settled somewhere safe, or what could be considered safe. 

“How far are we from your brother's place?” You weren’t sure what you wanted the answer to be, nothing sounded positive in the moment.

“About ten miles, it’s all mainly downhill which should be easier with your wound,” Joel glanced at your side noticing your shirt seemed to still be sticky.

“And you’re not going to kill me?” Your voice was shaky, whether it was fear of the sudden lack of adrenaline coursing through your body you weren’t sure.

“I can assure you we’re not going to kill you, Tommy’s compound will keep you safe,” What could he even say to truly reassure you that things weren’t that bad?

Ellie had slipped out of the room entirely, hiding away in one of the spare bedrooms on the first floor. Would you be more comfortable sleeping in a bed where you had more space? Maybe Joel could help you up to the master bedroom and get you comfortable.

“There’s a couple rooms, we’re going to stay the night and then finish the trek tomorrow, does that sound good?” Joel waited until you nodded, sliding his arms beneath you gently before lifting you off the couch.

He would have to get a shirt from Ellie’s bag and give it to you to replace the blood stained one, nothing worse than having them assume you were infected. Would you be able to handle that much walking with your wound? When Joel had been stabbed he was out for nearly two weeks, that was a bad time.

You’d tried to keep your eyes open, truly you did, but the pain was too much to bear and soon you had slipped into the dark embrace of unconsciousness. Joel couldn’t let Ellie know things were going catastrophically, lest he have her start worrying even more. Shit, Joel was most likely going to end up staying awake to make sure you didn’t die throughout the night. Then again it wouldn’t be the first time someone had died on Joel’s watch.

“Stay with us, don’t need Ellie beating me up cause you managed to die,” Joel gently laid you down on the bed, pulling the blanket over your limp frame.

Shirt first, then he could sit down and eat something before getting ready to sit by your side until tomorrow morning. Ellie was probably already asleep, or snacking on some food since it had been a few days. The hike was going to be treacherous, especially with the injuries you had it would take even longer. Taking one final glance to where you were laying Joel headed out of the bedroom in search of Ellie. She was exactly where he’d expected her to be, curled up in front of the fireplace with a can of chef boyardee.

“Please tell me you cooked that first,” Joel knelt down beside her, carefully sitting down with a small huff. “Yeah, made enough for you too since she’s asleep,” Ellie was eating much slower than he expected, practically savoring each bite.

“Thanks,” Joel grabbed the pot lid carefully, scooping up a ravioli into his mouth and chewing slowly.

The air outside was whipping harshly, reminding both Joel and Ellie that they weren’t close enough to the compound to truly feel safe.

“She’s really pretty,” Ellie had finished her dinner, stirring around the remaining sauce in the pot.

“Yeah, she definitely hasn’t lost her looks,” Joel shoveled another ravioli into his mouth before he could keep talking, more embarrassed by what he was saying.

Ellie wasn’t sure what else to say, she’d run into you by complete accident and acted on purely instinct to avoid getting hurt. Except it clearly had hurt Joel in a way, just because it wasn’t physical didn’t mean it didn’t do any harm. There were a few doctors at the compound, if they were able to get you back safely they’d fix you right up and Joel wouldn’t be mad at Ellie anymore… Right?

You’d barely made it through the night, waking up in a cold sweat every few hours as a fever started to take over. Joel had been by your bedside the entire time, ignoring every obligation he had to make sure you were alright. Maybe it was selfish of him but he needed things to turn out alright. The first few miles were a little rocky, Joel wasn’t sure you would be able to stay on your feet the entire time. It wasn’t until you were right outside of the compound that everything started to sink in. Ellie could hold herself up in the bedroom and hide until Joel came searching for her. Maybe she’d get enough time to sit and wallow in peace before he came storming in and blaming her for why someone else he cared about almost died by her hands.

Ellie had blamed herself for a lot of things, but whenever someone died because of her, well that shit really stuck. Joel hoisted you in his arms before running into the compound, screaming that he needed a doctor to help get your fever under control. Ellie snuck off quietly, leaving behind Joel as Tommy ran over with someone she assumed was important. Of course she was absolutely starving, the food they’d eaten the night before didn’t do much to curb her hunger. She wouldn’t go to the mess hall though, not with Joel being out and about while they did whatever they could to help you. She really missed Riley, she’d know what to do in this type of situation.

Maria caught a glance of Ellie as she made her way back to her and Joel’s shared home, roughly wiping at the tears that slipped down her cheeks. Maria knew better than to go after the teen and ask her what was wrong. Could it have been the woman that Joel had come in with, was she upset they had brought another stranger in? She would have to ask Tommy about it all later when they had dinner, right now she was busy taking care of her daughter.

Ellie had locked her door the moment she was inside, stripping off her backpack and jacket with an angry huff. This was all her fault, everything that happened was all her fucking fault. Why did she have to go after you, when you were just trying to defend yourself?

“Goddammit!” She kicked the dresser harshly, wincing as pain shot through her foot and shin.

Great, now she’d gone and gotten herself hurt as well, no wonder Joel hadn’t wanted to keep her around before. The sun was just starting to set outside the windows to her left, bathing the room in a soft orange glow. Maybe a nap would help, not like there was much else she could do anyway. First though she’d take a much needed shower and get into some clean clothes. Going over to the closet that Maria must have stocked when they left, Ellie dug through to find some clothes. A plain old t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants would have to do the job for now, clean off the grime and sleep the issues away.

Joel was terrified, you’d been nearly comatose the entire time since they arrived back in Jackson. Your fever finally dropped, which put him at ease for a brief moment before he came back to the reality that you’d be asleep for a while. Tommy had promised him you were in good hands, that they’d make sure you would be perfectly fine. How could Joel possibly believe them? You were someone he’d lost all those years ago, and yet here you were right in front of him. Maybe he should get something to eat and take a shower, wouldn’t do him any good if he was starving and stunk like shit by the time you woke up.

“Could you come and get me if she wakes up, please?” Joel didn’t want to sound desperate, but there was an underlying urgency to his tone.

“Of course, we’ll alert Tommy right away to find you,” It was the best they could do, Joel was still a stranger to these people.

Joel left without looking back at you, he knew well enough that if he saw you lying peacefully on that hospital bed he’d never want to leave. Without letting himself doubt anything Joel made his way to the house, it was time for a shower and then to get something to eat. Maybe he could stock up their kitchen with what they had and cook for Ellie and you one night. Wouldn’t be for a while of course, Joel needed to make sure he was in the people’s good graces first and foremost. As he made his way up to his own bedroom he frowned when he noticed Ellie’s light was turned off, had she gone to bed?

“Ellie?” Joel knocked on her door carefully, frowning further as he noticed the door was locked.

“Sweetheart, you okay?” She’d have said if something was bothering her, right?

Joel waited for any type of answer, or even any movement that let him know Ellie was in her bedroom. The soft sound of rustling sheets gave him the answer he was looking for, at least he knew she was safe. Turning and heading back to his own bedroom Joel tried to figure out where to go from here. First thing would be a shower, then some food. Shit, should he bring something back and leave it in the fridge for Ellie? Surely she’d be hungry after the journey they just had. He was shocked at how stocked the closet was, there definitely weren’t this many clothes the last time they’d been here. Had they been hoping he and Ellie had come back? Goddammit, Joel didn’t need to start getting emotional over things like this.

Grabbing the necessary clothes Joel headed over to the bathroom attached to his bedroom. It was smaller than their main bathroom, but that didn’t bother him at all. There were a few new things in the bathroom as well, different types of soaps, shaving cream, and even a razor. God, when’s the last time Joel was able to shave? He’d gotten so used to having facial hair he hadn’t even thought about it before. Maybe he could trim it later, he’d definitely need a haircut eventually, his hair was getting too damn long.

He set down his clothes before turning to the shower, cranking the handle to the left so the water would be hot enough to wash away all the grime. Steam had begun to fill the small space as Joel stripped down, looking over the many scars that littered his body. The one on his right side stuck out the most, that time had been so traumatic for Ellie and he blamed himself daily. Had he just been able to see the asshole coming he wouldn’t have been injured, but it was his right side, and Joel had all but lost all his hearing on that side.

Now wasn’t the time to think about his past mistakes, that would happen when he was laying in bed like any other normal person. Joel chuckled to himself and stepped under the scalding spray, groaning as the water rushed down his aching back. He grimaced as the water darkened with dirt, sweat, and a little bit of blood. Grabbing one of the bars of soap Joel started to lather it in his hands before scrubbing at his body and hair. As long as Joel was clean he didn’t care about anything else right now. Well, except for making sure you and Ellie were alright, but that was Joel's number one priority all the time.

Once he was finally clean, Joel stepped out of the shower and grabbed the towel closest to him, drying off his body and hair before getting dressed. The clothes were a damn near perfect fit, and he wasn’t sure if that was due to losing even more weight during their journey home. No time to think about stuff like that right now, he needed to get some food. He’d get something to eat and bring something home to Ellie. Maybe he could go back and sit with you for a little while as long as Tommy didn’t need him.

So much to do and so little time. Joel was getting too damn old for this shit.