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lily-avenue · 6 months

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Musings on Gold Digger (2019)

** Warning contains major spoilers **

** Also warning: massively long-winded ramble **

Julia Ormond, Ben Barnes and an exploration of a may-december romance in the midst of complicated famillial dynamics and an underlying unease.

Both leads are very good. We see Julia Day (Julia Ormond) reclaim herself as she moves out of the roles to which she has been assigned, or perhaps more accurately, has assigned herself; while Benjamin Greene (Ben Barnes) treads the fine line of someone who is not entirely what he seems to be, and who in pursuing the path he has chosen, is moving both closer to, and further away, from what he needs. We all, or many of us at least, want to be known and loved for who we actually are.

The supporting cast are uniformly excellent, with each episode putting the spotlight on one of Julia's now-adult kids (Patrick, Della and Leo), her ex-husband (Ted), her ex-best-friend (Marsha), and her new lover.

The series poses a range of complex, thorny questions, such as what it means to take a much younger (or much older) lover; the immediate and long-term aftermath of domestic violence; the loss of confidence and trust following betrayal; the ripple effect of those pivotal moments that each of us have in our lives; and the small (and large) lies that we tell ourselves and each other.

Nearly everyone in Julia's life is openly and vocally "concerned" when she introduces the much younger Benjamin into her life, and the series also explores the cost of pursuing your own happiness in the face of others' disapproval.

For the most part, the two sons (Patrick and Leo) are Not Very Nice. While they are not necessarily unjustified in their concerns about Benjamin, and are each grappling with the fallout of their parents' shared history, how they act upon those concerns is rather unpleasant. (And slighly nonsensical. Patrick is a well-heeled lawyer, surely he would have hired a private investigater to do some digging?) Della, her daughter, is the most open of the three to their mother's new relationship. And while for the most part that isn't saying much, Della's growing acceptance and support of Julia's right to be her own person and the strength she demonstrates in doing so, make for a lovely subplot - particularly as it starts to positively impact her own life.

While the series asks a lot of questions, it doesn't necessarily answer them in a way that fully satisfies. We see Benjamin and Julia's attraction in numerous sex scenes, and it is fabulous to move from the early scenes, in which she turns off the light, to later scenes in which she has pushed aside some of her insecurities. But we don't see enough of their intellectual attraction, of the non-physical side of things, and of how they navigate the fact that in terms of cultural milieu, he has far more in common with her children than with her (sort of, that too is complicated). There are some lovely glimpses - the book of walks he gives her as a gift, for example, rather than ubiquitous and offensively-generic flowers. But their growing closeness is mostly given in montages of them walking around holding hands in various locales - we are rarely privvy to the intimate discussions that would show a deepening relationship.

Much goes unquestioned by Julia, which given her intelligence and life experience seems somewhat implausible, although perhaps newly discovered and unexpected love can make fools of us all? Her lack of curiosity about Benjamin's past, which clearly continues to affect him, or his financial situation (mid 30s, professional job, but about to be hounded by bailiffs?) is hand-waved away at one point. This is one of those instances where I cannot tell if it suboptimal writing (maintaining suspense at the cost of characterisation) or very clever writing (Julia tends to avoid conflict; her reluctance to ask questions to which she doesn't necessarily want to know the answer has precedence). Herein lies the dilemma of suspense-based drama: in keeping Benjamin an relatively unknown quality we lose the opportunity to get to know him and Julia as a couple, and that becomes problematic later on.

We experience Julia's growth as she takes responsibility for her own destiny, eventually starting to question what it is that Benjamin isn't telling her, and taking the necessary steps to find out more. And when she finds out more, and it is rather confronting, she still chooses to listen before coming to her own conclusions. But we don't see the same for Benjamin. His journey is more opaque, and because we only get very few snippits of his life before Julia, is largely for the viewer to infer, or only becomes evident after the fact. He wants to run away when things start to close in on him, but he doesn't. Ultimately his hand is forced and he breaks a long-held agreement with his brother to put his own needs first. (There is a small subplot about an engagement that didn't happen; a former girlfriend broke up with him the day he proposed, and one wonders if it was because he also told her the truth about his past.)

There are interesting contrasts between Benjamin and Ted. Both are outwardly well put together, but neither are what they seem. Ted is successful, wealthy and enmeshed in entitled middleclass-ness, while Benjamin is not, despite his facade of the urbane younger man.

But the outward trappings hide the fact that Ted is controlling and violent, while Benjamin - despite what the criminal justice system would say - is neither. And that contrast is backed up by the scene with Ted in the forest on the morning of the wedding, compared with that with Benjamin on the beach (in which Julia asks him to not touch her, and he listens and respects her wishes instantly). Even throughout the argument with his newly re-emerged brother Kieran, which escalates into low-level violence, Benjamin only ever reacts, never instigates.

And it would be entirely remiss of me not to mention Marsha, who has made her own bed, unfortunately with Ted in it. We meet Marsha just as she is beginning to realise the extent of the poor bargain she's made, and it really only gets worse.

I am still not sure whether the series simply had very high expectations of the viewer, or whether the script spread itself too thin and undercut itself. The distrust and deception that flows throughout the series was almost catching, and in the face of it I wanted stronger closure, a deeper resolution of the issues that came to light late in the piece. In the absence of that, Kieran's words after the fight with Benjamin resonate just a little too strongly for me. Are they actually in love with one another, or are they in love with what the other represents to them?

Is Benjamin a gold digger? Not, I think, in the traditional sense of the term. He sees in Julia an embodiment of the life he wants to have, but had always been excluded from. My take is that the attraction and burgeoning love is real, but that it is also inseparable from her aura of wealth, education and intellect, which are an integral part of who she is and how she moves through the world.

He was certainly not honest with her, and that also poses an interesting question about how much of our ourselves, and our actions, we can mask, ignore or conceal before sliding into deception or disaster. Alongside Benjamin editing his past to hide a terrible act (in which he played a supporting role but shouldered much of the consequences), we have a younger Julia peddling the fiction that all was well with her (first) marriage, Ted hiding his violent streak, Patrick having an affair, Leo knowing about Ted and Marsha but not telling his mother. The list goes on.

The lingering disquiet of how much of Benjamin is a performance, and how much is real, never quite leaves. We do see sharper edges to him at times, which are in keeping with what is revealed about his past (you couldn't come out of young offenders unscathed, and you certainly wouldn't get through it without developing some pretty decent survival mechanisms), although Julia herself is not privvy to them. It is in the rawness and desperation of a couple of his reactions that a measure of confirmation is provided that his feelings towards Julia are genuine. There is a two-fold element of unreliable narration with Benjamin, yet it feels not entirely unreasonable to conclude that Benjamin the construct is underpinned by a longstanding and deep-seated need, and has largely become Benjamin the actual. But how recent was this process, and was it a legitimate one? We don't ever really find out, and that matters when it comes to our central conundrum.

But as may have become evident throughout this long-winded ramble, one of my own personal failings is that I like my fictional endings to be happy, and unambiguously so. I want Julia to enjoy her 'after', just as much as I want Benjamin to revel in the safety and belonging she provides. So holding onto a suitable measure of optimism (or perhaps of wishful thinking - our characters may not be alone in their penchant for self-deception), let us now return to their wedding reception and one of my favourite scenes. Watching a truly beguiling Julia invite Benjamin to dance, and an utterly charming Benjamin follow her onto the dance floor, made me smile. A lot. And with that in mind I am going to find myself a glass of champagne, ensure my best smile is firmly in place, and head out onto the dance floor to wish the two of them my very best.

#gold digger #gold digger 2019 #julia ormond #ben barnes #will I still agree with most of this on a rewatch? Who knows.#gold digger series #julia day #benjamin greene #long-winded ramble because there can be no other type

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harvey-brainrot · 3 months

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Obligatory Intro

Hiii I'm Viva! I'm a 20 year old autistic FREAK who has been totally in love with Harvey since I started playing Stardew in like 2019. My pronouns are primarily she/it but overall you can use whatever pronouns you like :)

I'm gonna use this blog to post about all things Harvey related! Fanart (all reblogged bc I can't draw lmao), imagines, headcanons, rambles, etc etc. I'll gladly take requests too! SOME POSTS WILL BE NSFW but I'll be sure to tag them. Maaaaaybe I'll make posts about other characters here and there but overall this blog will be centered around my favorite pathetic boyfail doctor

Nice to meet you, everyone! If you ever want to talk to me, feel free, but please know that I'm really shy around new people so try to be patient with me

Below I'll talk about my farmersona a bit just for funsies :3 totally don't have to read it though! The stuff above is what's most important

Meet My Farmersona!

Aka me but cooler

(Portrait was made + slightly edited using Poltergeister & Jaz's Portrait Maker. Pet images are used from Otter's Pet Mod 2.0)

Some additional info for funsies:

Getting around on horseback? No. Detachable roller skates

Her dog, Angel, is either a newfoundland or a saint bernard. I haven't decided yet

Despite her colorful appearance, she's really introverted and anxious

That being said, once you get her to open up, she's a professional yapper. There is no off switch. Sorry

An absolute horror fanatic. She's been watching horror movies, reading horror stories, and playing horror games for as long as she can remember

Bonus: About Harviva

Some additional info for funsies:

They might have some noticeable conflicting traits, but overall their similarities bring them close together. Such as their social awkwardness, their deep passion for their respective niche interests, their fondness for history and old films, enjoying the smaller things in life, and so on

Viva never forces Harvey to watch horror movies with her, but sometimes he'll try to watch them with her for her sake. Always ends with him cowering in Viva's arms

Viva brings excitement into Harvey's life, while Harvey brings stability into Viva's life. Both things that they desperately need

They're both totally useless when it comes to romance. It's not that they don't do anything nice for each other — that couldn't be farther from the truth — they just get super flustered trying to carry their acts of romance out. Losers

Harvey was a little scared of Viva at first. She's not intimidating per se, but he did think that she was going to be a very loud and reckless party-loving person. Reckless? Sometimes. But a few conversations with her made him realize that she's actually really chill and usually matches the energy of whoever she's talking to. She also probably confessed to him at one point that she spends an ungodly amount of time making mental scripts for social interactions to keep from making a fool of herself and Harvey was like "oh wow she's just like me"

#intro post #hiiiii :3 #you guys will be subjected to my autism now #i just realized #my fave and least fave festivals are in the same seasons as my fave and least fave seasons #anyways #i'm very normal about harvey #stardew valley #sdv

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spagheddiesquash · 2 months

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ok hold on now that ive built up a tagging system lemme explain it

so we have the tiers of “fav”:

fav

fav of all time

fav a million times

ULTRA FAV

SUPER DUPER FAV

these refer to posts i really like or i guess stick with me. the tiers provide a sort of “filter” i guess. makes it easier to sort through and find the posts ive reblogged that i enjoy the most.

then theres the tiers of immediate fav:

immediate fav

immediate ultra fav

these are when i dont even bother going through the different tiers of fav because i think the post is that good.

some additional ones:

“iconic” -> old posts. usually the stuff you see reposted to pinterest, but i tend to tag any post from 2019 and earlier with this. if i tag it and feel it wouldnt make sense, sometimes i add a “<- to me” so that it makes more sense.

“rambles”/“eddie’s rambles” -> self explanatory. these are when i ramble on one of my own posts. i dont use this tag on reblogs where i ramble but if youd like to look for them you can probably search “sorry for rambling” on my blog since i tend to say that on posts where i do long tag rambles.

and then obviously you have the other extremely self explanatory tags like “art” and “important” and “queue”

for things like resources and tips on stuff, ill usually tag with:

“useful”

“save”

“save for later”

“ooo useful”

if i reblog a bunch of posts about a certain holiday and youd like to search my blog for posts about it, you can do that by searching “[holiday name] [year]” i.e. “april fools 2024”

and yeah thats about it i think. making this my new pinned post because the old one was an extremely outdated intro.

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fox-daddy · 1 year

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1 am ramblings;

The body of the fool and half the heart of a magician (au? An mc story? Both?)

This is an idea I've had ever since I started playing Asra's route back in 2019 however have only spent more time messing with it recently. Looking at scenes from Asra and Nadia's route it has been messing with my mind once again. What else am I supposed to do at 1am? Sleep?

I'm dubbing it an au because I don't think it's really what happened but I like to pretend it is for Kyle my main MC purely as extra spice. You're more than welcome to use it for your MC since it doesn't really effect MC's past at all. So let's start at the beginning with MC dead and the ritual in full swing.

The way the devil wanted it to go is the fool had agreed to give their body up to a human for the chance of a new beginning, feeding into their major arcana as the fool. So the devil would give Lucio the body of the fool, fully expecting the fool to overpower him and gain a free human form while he could control the materal world. Merging it and the arcanic realms and ruling over it. His fool plan. To give the arcana more power.

However, the fool being sneaky never said which human they would give their body to. Having a plan with the magician set up behind the devil's back. Not only for a way for the magician to help Asra but also the fool.

During the ritual the magician said they knew how to bring MC back for half Asra's heart but was only telling Asra half the truth. They couldn't but they knew who could. Since one cannot offer someone else's soul without permission as seen in reversed Nadia's ending. So it's easy to assume this also works with someone else's body. Both belong to someone else after all, you can't offer something you don't own.

While they were making the deal with Asra the fool slipped away finding MC between the border of life and death being freshly killed their spirit was still left. So the fool made a deal with MC.

They would bring MC back by giving MC their body and magic in return for being able to live inside MC. This means being able to see, feel, taste everything MC does. To feel the deepest sadness to the strongest love. Something a major arcana like them could never understand. But something the fool wanted to understand.

Before I go on why doesn't MC have a mark?

Simple, they do! But unlike Asra, Nadia, Julian the mark is the magic itself. The mark of the deal is the fools magic their own aura is the mark. If you go off the chakra idea Mc's mark is above their head, not physically on their body. So looking for it on their body is never going to work. Because the mark manifested as their aura of infinite colours.

Why does the fool need half Asra's heart? Simply put it if the fool used their heart it would overwhelm Mc immediately causing the fool to take control over the body. Since the fool's deal is to being Mc back their bound by their own chains causing the body to go catatonic as the fool has no power to control Mc. They didn't agree for the fool to come back after all.

The solution is to use half Asra's heart to keep Mc grounded enough to not be immediately overwhelmed by the fools magic and body, to use Asra as an anchor. As Mc grows a stronger foundation of who they are they can tap into this power more and regain more memories without relying on Asra as an anchor as much.

The headaches being a warning their not ready yet, like how a magician gets weak if they start using too much magic. If they push it too far they start to lose themselves to the fool. Their body taking on that of the fool as they lose the ability to function due to the fools deal. Making Mc unable to recognize their own hands because they no longer look like their hands.

So in this au the pomegranate juice only helped break Lucio's deal not fully break it like Asra thinks. However the devil makes up for this by tricking Mc into leaving their body letting Lucio have it, filling his part and then just needing Lucio to full his part the requirement of his blood. The pomegranate wasn't what truly broke the ritual and the magician knows this. Having this to say when Mc wonders if the same trick would work again.

So where is the fools heart? In the middle of their realm. To keep the fools heart safe only two people have access to the fools realm. The fool and scout.

So quick question who the f is scout? Well like the lovers theirs two bodies on the fools card. The fool and their dog warning them of danger.

Scout is the fool just as much as Mc is. Which is how the realm didnt fall apart with the absence of the fool, because it still had a fool to rule over it.

This au also says we get a glance at the fools realm early on in Asra's route in a paid scene. When Mc and Asra explore his oasis an oasis designed to be able to connect to anywhere in the arcanic realms as a reminder.

It's never rained in Asra's oasis. They don't say 'this hasn't happened in years' but 'that's never happened before' I doubt Asra never took Mc into their gate before the plague with them both being powerful magicians.

That is the entrance to the fools domain in this au. If Asra and Mc climbed down they would enter the fools domain leaving Asra's oasis where it never rains.

Why does it show itself? With Mc in the arcanic realms it senses the fools magic, it can sense Mc and since Mc isn't focused on going to a major arcana like the magician or the high priestess and at this point Mc isn’t fighting something like the tower it reveals itself to them.

But hey that's just a theory, A GAME THEORY!

Jokes aside what do you think of this au? I tend to keep au's as close to cannon as I can. Even if the au itself is self indulgent.

#the arcana game #the arcana mc #the arcana apprentice #asra the arcana #the arcana fan apprentice #fan apprentice #the arcana fanfic #the arcana spoilers #the arcana scout #the arcana magician #the arcana devil #lucio the arcana #the arcana au #the arcana asra

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kaxen · 8 months

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A rambling thought about cyberpunk dystopia, doomerism, and the uselessness of perfectionism

…..the US needed floppy disks for nuclear shit until like 2019.

I feel like this puts a damper on all the sci-fi that is like BUT THE GOVERNMENT HAS SO MUCH TECHNOLOGY. lol

The eternal struggle being doomerism and "realistically, you're giving bad people too much credit for being smart in this dystopia."

Like the Nazis were also pretty inefficient and stupid too. ((this train of thought was somewhat incited by watching a video on the Balkans, blaming everything on WWI, contemplating killing every guy who drew a line on maps for a country he doesn't live in, and taking a detour to kill Hitler, just in case))

Anyway, this is why it's better to sticky tape a solution and keep going than to sit around complaining none of the solutions are perfect enough.

Bigger idiots and bigger assholes can get so much momentum because they personally do not care how shitty of a job they do.

Uncompromising perfectionists throwing their dumbass ideas in politics discourse drives me a little cray-cray.

“THESE VIABLE MULTI-STEP IDEAS AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH, SO WHY DON'T WE ALL NOT VOTE AND BLOW UP THE GOVERNMENT”

JESUS CHRIST HAVE YOU NEVER STUDIED HISTORY.

REVOLUTION AIN'T PRETTY OR SIMPLE.

IT'S EVEN MORE TRYING TO NOT DIE AS YOU SLAP TRACKS DOWN.

Being uncompromisingly perfect in an imperfect world is a fool's errand.

And honestly sometimes I need to remind myself that since I am a person of occasionally delicate disposition and the Perfectionism Gremlin is a cunt.

Don't need to cure everything all at once. Sometimes you just gotta start by putting a fuckin' basket where you keep dropping all your shit and then move on to the next small fix you can manage.

#I don't think I am a full doomer #but sometimes it is a powerful specter #might just be exhaustion

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alieinthemorning · 10 months

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Lukanette Month 2019 | Week One | Firsts

Content: Fluff, Angst, Canon Divergence, Aged-Up Characters

Pairing: Viperion | Luka Couffaine/ Ladybug | Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Header: @/katydoodles on Tumblr

Reblogs: Let me know that you enjoy my work and want to see more, so don’t forget to like and reblog (and comment in the tags. I love seeing people’s rambles in the tags)!

This work’s concepts, plot and original characters are my own which means I do not allow any sort of creative theft nor do I allow my work to be entered into any sort of A.I. bots. Thank you for respecting my space and boundaries.

Sunday September 1st, 2019 - First Day

When Marinette first met Luka, it was when she decided to help Ivan, Juleka and Rose with their band. They invited everyone in class to either come and help or come for the show. Which of course meant Adrien was invited and he told them that he was going to come and help (he had somehow gotten his father to agree)! Marinette was so excited for him to be there, but as it got closer and closer he hadn’t even sent a text.

Marinette sighed. “He’s not here yet.”

“No worries girl.” Alya slung an arm around her shoulders. “The gig hasn’t started yet.”

“What if he doesn’t know Juleka’s address? Or he got the wrong day? Or he’s lost?” Marinette listed off all the reasons as though why Adrien was late. “Could you check with Nino please? You know, of course, just… casually.” She pressed her fingers together, embarrassed.

Alya roller her eyes then called out to Nino. “Hey Nino, have you heard from Adrien, by any chance?”

Nino looked up from what he was doing as he adjusted his cap. “He had something to do his old man. He said he’ll come right after.”

Alya turned back to Marinette with a knowing look. The pigtailed girl flushed and released an unsteady giggle.

“Capitaine Anarka speaking to ya! So how’s it coming along me young pirates? Ready to celebrate the-” She looked at Marinette then adjusted her glasses. “Whatcha up to, there, matey?”

Marinette jumped, almost dropping the box that was in her hands. “Uh, hello ma‘am. I’m cleaning up for tonight! Your boat’s gonna be clean as a whistle!”

“You’re cleaning!” Anarka let out a deep belly laugh. “We never pick up ‘round this house! Didn’t me daughter tell ye?” She gestured to the boat. Taking a look around, Marinette notice how messy the boat actually was. “We like the lived-in look. We have no rules on The Liberty! Out of chaos comes creation! Messiness is life.” And with that, she strutted off.

“That was… interesting.” Marinette gave an unsure smile to Alya who returned it with a shrug.

Nino’s ringtone announced itself in the silence. Marinette knew that ringtone. She knew exactly who it was for and she felt her heart breaking before he even answered. “Wassup dude?...Wow, what happened?... Whoa, that’s real rough. Good luck dude, see you tomorrow!” He hung up and turned to the girls.

“That was Adrien wasn’t it.” Marinette could feel her heart sinking deep into her chest. “He can’t come.”

Nino nodded and Marinette sighed.

Rose approached Anarka and saluted. “We’re ready Capitaine! Uh… but Luka is missing.”

“Marinette, is it?” Ararka faced her. “Since you’re free of ye cleanin’ duties, could you go and fetch Luka?”

“Of course. Uh, but who’s Luka? And where is he?”

“Luka’s my son, you’ll find him in his cabin.”

Marinette nodded and headed below deck, peeking into rooms until she heard the sound of a guitar being plucked. Without thinking she pushed the door open. When she set eyes upon the boy who sat on the bed she let out a startled gasp. “Uh!’

“Hey, my name’s Mama—uh Mamamarinette!” Anymore stuttering and she’d bite off her tongue. “Your mom sent me down here. The groove—uh… group’s waiting for you.”

“Hello, Mamamarinette.” He chuckled.

Marinette’s face fell. She’d only known him for a few seconds and she had already made a fool out of herself. Seems like that was all she’d be known for.

“Sorry. I tend to make more sense with this.” He strummed a few cords his guitar. “That’s strange. It seems you have something like this in your heart.” He continued the melody.

“How do you do that?” Marinette almost slapped a hand over her mouth but held back. It’s fine to ask questions, she reminded herself.

“Music is often simpler than words.” He reached over and grabbed a familiar looking guitar pick.

“You like Jagged Stone’s music?”

“He’s my favorite singer.”

She smiled. “Mine too.”

He held the pick out to her. “You can have it if you like. I’ve got plenty.”

“Wow! Thanks!” She plucked it from his hands.

“I think I’d better go join the… groove, you said?”

Marinette flushed. “Did I really say that?”

Luka laughed. “You’re a funny girl, Marinette.”

A little flutter kicked up in her tummy.

She liked his laugh.

Monday September 2nd, 2019 - First Concert

She must have followed Luka in a daze because the next thing she knew she was being shaken by Alya. “Are you okay girl?”

Marinette nodded. “Mhh-hmm.”

“Ho, ho, sailors! Let’s give them a show! Whenever your ready, Luka!”

Mylene walked over and handed them earplugs. “You’re going to need these, believe me.”

Luka strummed his guitar loudly. At least that’s what Marinette assumed because she could still hear him through the earplugs. She took them out, however, when Officier Raincomprix pulled up beside the boat.

“Mme. Anarka, are you completely out of your mind? I’m reading one hundred sixty decibels! That’s ten times the sound of a jet engine! You can’t do this. You’ll have to play something else!”

“It’s the National Music Festival today, Officer Roger! My crew’s allowed to play whatever they want!”

“It’s a music festival, not a noise festival. If you don’t turn the volume down, I’ll ban your concert altogether!”

Marinette spoke up. “Uh, maybe we could turn the volume down a bit, Capitaine? Then there’d be no more problems, right?”

“No, out of the question. I didn’t name my galleon Liberty for nothing, you know! It’s a matter of principle! Haven’t you heard of speech, Roger? This is me home! I will do as I want!”

As they got into a heated argument, Marinette slowly slinked away from the scene. She knew Anarka was going to be akumatized and that there'd be no stopping it, if her attitude was anything to go by. It’d be easier to just be ready then to possibly get captured, so with that thought, Marinette transformed then zipped off to the nearest building behind the boat.

Moments later the boat was covered in dark purple smoke. She didn’t think the whole boat would be effected. She returned, gasping as chains wrapped around the passengers and dragged them below deck.

“Liberty! Fire!” The cannons fired at the bridge destroying it and clearing the path ahead.

“This isn’t good.” She threw her yoyo at the railing and slid in threw an open port hole on the side.

“Ladybug!” Alya called.

“Shhh!” She crouched down. “What’s the situation?”

“Juleka and Luka’s mom was akumatized because Officer Roger gave her a lot of tickets.” Alya explained.

“She didn’t care about the tickets… it was more so about the freedom.” Juleka softly spoke up.

Ladybug nodded. “Okay. Did anyone see where the akuma flew into?”

“The compass.” Luka answered.

Ladybug smiled. “Thanks. I’ll have everything back to normal before you can say ‘Ladybug’!”

Easiest way to get it done was from the outside rather than trying to sneak up top. She went back out the way she came then shimmed her way to the back of the boat. She almost jumped a foot in the air when something thudded beside her.

“M’lady.” Chat Noir nodded his head.

She nodded back. “Chat.”

“What’s the situation?”

“It’s a battle for freedom.” She nudged him to the left as Aranka moved closer to their location. “See that compass over there? The akuma is over there.”

“Cataclysm?”

“Cataclysm. I’ll give you an opening.” She snuck across the left side of the boat and waited until Aranka’s back was turned.

“Hey! Capitaine!” Ladybug shouted.

Aranka spun on her heel and glared. “How did you get on my ship?”

Ladybug took another step to left. Aranka followed and took a step to the right. “Why are you destroying public property?”

She just had to get the compass out of her peripheral. She watched as Chat Noir slinked closer and closer to the compass, Cataclysm at the ready.

“It goes against me freedom. The freedom of the Liberty!” She took a threatening step forward. “As long as this ship sails, so does freedom.”

“Well I’m sorry to tell you but it looks like the sails of the Liberty to lose their winds! Now Chat Noir!” At her call, Chat Noir touched the compass, having it rust and crumble into nothing.

“Noo!” Aranka ran at Ladybug but as soon as the akuma was out of the compass Ladybug snapped it up and purified it.

“Bye bye, little butterfly.” She thrusted her yoyo in the air. “Miraculous Ladybug.” The little ladybugs repaired all the damage the Liberty caused.

Ladybug and Chat Noir pounded fist. “Pound it!”

Anarka looked up at the two. “What happened?

“Oh not much, you just had a bout of… Seasickness.” Chat Noir’s Miraculous beeped. “Time to raise the sails my lady.” He pounced away.

Ladybug gave Anarka a wave as the previous captures came above deck. “Enjoy your gig, bug out!” She jumped off the boat, seemingly disappearing but actually hanging on the side. She made her way to an open port hole and slide her way into the bathroom.

“Spots off.” She opened the door and peeked into the hallway.

“Marinette?” Luka called her from down the hall.

She fully stepped out into hallway. “Y-yeah. I came down here earlier and hid during the akuma attack. Everyone okay?”

Luka sighed. “Yeah. Yeah, everyone is fine.” He gestured toward the stairs. “Come on. We’re about to start.”

Marinette smiled and followed after him.

The concert was amazing. Surprising but amazing. And Adrien was there so that made the day the best ever!

But… her gaze kept drifting to Luka. Her heart being played by the strings of his song.

Tuesday September 3rd, 2019 - First Fashion Show

Marinette’s nerves were frayed, but she was pumped. After a push from her parents, Alya and Tikki, Marinette entered a fashion show and was accepted. She immediately began sketching up designs that would go with the theme: Synthesia. Each contestant was to choose a song and design an outfit that match with what colors they believed were associated with that song.

Marinette had an advantage since she did actually have synthesia, so of course she choose her favorite Jagged Stone song. However, she noticed her colors started to shift after the first few listens. They went from their usually purples and black to shades of blue, and the one person who reminded her of so many shades of blue was…

Luka

She shook her head, leaving to deal with it later and continued working on her designs.

Hours later she was in a large room filled with rolls of fabric, spools of ribbon and boxes upon boxes of beads, jewels and other knick knacks.

Just as she put the finishing touches on her work, the contrast director walked in. “Hello everyone! Are you almost done with your designs?” The crowd muttered a mix response of mostly “almost done". “Well then, I think your ready to hear about the surprise!” She paused for dramatic effect. “You’ll be modeling your designs!”

“What?!”

She nodded. “Yep! Why do you think the models had the same exact measurements as you?” She clapped her hands once. “Well, we’ll be on in two hours. Enough time for hair, make-up and any finishing touches. Good luck!” And with that she left.

Marinette took a deep breath. She already had her suspicions, so she had been doing certain alterations to fit her specifically. She exhaled then moved to a vacant vanity to get started on her prep as she looked for make-up inspiration on Instagram.

“And now Marinette Dupain-Cheng walking to Blue Waves by Jagged Stone!”

Marinette took a deep breath then let a smile graced her features as she stepped out onto the runway. She kept her eyes straight but from her peripheral she was able to see Jagged tapping his boot to the beat of his song with Penny right by his side, tapping her own foot. Her parents recording the whole thing with dropped jaws, her friends sitting in the crowd with their own looks for awe.

And him.

Luka.

The boy who had inspired it all.

Wednesday September 4th, 2019 - First Blush

“Thanks for taking me out, Bridgette.”

“No prob, Mari. You deserve it.”

Marinette and her cousin, Bridgette, were out and about and had decided to stop by Andre’s to get some ice cream. Marinette immediately knew what the ice cream flavors represented, but she chose to ignore it.

“I’m serious Mari. You’ve been doing better since you’ve moved on past him.” Marinette hummed. “Seems like Andre’s noticed too.”

Marinette looked away. “O-oh really? I didn’t noticed.”

Bridgette laughed. “You’re way too smart to have noticed, Mari. You totally like Luka.”

Marinette felt her cheeks redden. “No I—!”

“Oh hey! Luka!” Bridgette called. Mariette whipped her glowing head face around and almost bolted from the spot. Of course Luka was only standing a few feet from them.

He smiled and approached them. “Hey… Bridgette, right?”

“Yep!” She nodded then turned to Marinette with a pout. “Jeez, Mari! I thought you’d talk about your most favorite cousin with your friends!” Marinette stumbled for a response.

Thankful Luka answered for her. “Oh no, she’s definitely mentioned you before. I just have a little hard time remembering names.” Luka rubbed the back of his neck as he gave her a sheepish smile.

“Oh well then that’s fine.” Her phone vibrated. “Whoopsie.” She checked the message then turned to Marinette with a guilty look. “Looks like Felix needs me for something.”

“Oh yeah, yeah. Sure. Go see what’s up.”

“Thanks Mari!” Bridgette bolted faster than Marinette thought was necessary.

“Hey, Marinette.” Mariette gripped the ice cream cone, cursing both her cousin and Felix for their terrible timing.

She’d get them back later. “Yes, Luka?”

“You wanna go to the park with me?” Marinette eyes widen by a fraction when she caught the familiar pink tinge his cheeks.

She smiled despite her hammering heart. “Sure.”

As they walked to their destination, their hands brushed against each other until Luka pulled her hand into his.

She just about fainted.

Thursday September 5th, 2019 - First Touch

He held her hand the entire time they were in the park and even now as they mindlessly walking around the city.

“So, where to next?”

“N-next?” He still wanted to hang out?

Luka nodded slowly. “Yeah… unless you have something to do.”

“Nonono!” Marinette furiously shook her head. “I just don’t know where to go next...”

Luka hummed. “Maybe we could go to a music store?”

Marinette nodded. “That seems like fun.”

They listened to a lot of music that was primarily by Jagged Stone. Marinette was surprised at the light the filled Luka’s eyes as listened to a new song. He would babble on and on about certain parts and things he would add and change.

Next, they headed to a pet store where Marinette gushed over the hamsters. Unbeknownst to her, Luka was giving her the softest smile.

Finally, he took her to a hole in the wall diner. Everyone there seemed to know him really well, so the atmosphere was light and fun. It finally allowed her red cheeks to take a break.

On the walk home, their hands rejoined and swung lightly between the two of them.

Friday September 6th, 2019 - First Kiss

It was later in the evening when Marinette has finally returned home with Luka. She had an amazing time and honestly Marinette wanted to have the day play on repeat so she could do it again and again.

Luka stopped short but a few steps away from the store. “I’ll see you around?”

Marinette gave him her brightest smile and nodded. “Of course!”

Luka leaned in and gave her a peck on the cheek. “I’ll see you around Mamamarinette.”

Marinette lifted a hand to her cheek and stood frozen for what felt like years. Finally she made the few steps home after Tikki snapped her out of the trance.

When she entered her room she almost spun on her heel and went right back out.

Bridgette was giving her the smuggest look.

“Shut it.” Marinette hissed. “One word and I swear to—”

“I promise on our sistership.”

“You better.”

Saturday September 7th, 2019 - Second Chance

Marinette stared at the box on her desk which contained a Miraculous.

Specifically the Cat Miraculous.

She really hated to think about it. How everything seemed to fallout.

Was it her— was she to blame?

No… it couldn’t be. She set her boundary and he crossed it. He wasn’t able to comprehend the responsibility of being a hero of Paris. He wasn’t able to respect her as a person. He put her on such a high pedestal that he didn’t know how to act.

And as much as it hurt.

It had to happen.

But that’s in the past and this is the present.

“Tikki, spots on.”

She had to go find her new partner.

“Luka Couffaine.”

“Ladybug? What are you doing here?”

She gazed into those beautiful blues that now captured her heart. The beat changing from a fast set thump to a steady bump.

But she couldn't let her heart dictate everything.

But… she knew Luka. She knew that he is someone who is loyal, smart and cunning.

That he is the rightful owner of the Cat Miraculous.

Ladybug took a deep breath. “Luka Couffaine, this is the Miraculous of the Cat, which grants the power of Destruction. This power shall only be used for the greater good. I present this Miraculous to you. Do you accept this power?”

“Of course, My-.” Ladybug’s eyes widen.

Not that.

She didn’t want to hear those words again. “-mamarinette.”

Ladybug gasped. “H-how did you?”

“Didn’t I tell you?” He smiled as he took her free hand in both of his. “You’re an extraordinary girl, Marinette. As clear as a musical note and as sincere as a melody. You’re the music that’s been playing inside my head since the first day we met. Mask or not.”

Ladybug gave him a watery smile. “Thank you, Luka.”

Thank you for being my second chance.

Ko-Fi | Commission | Masterlist

#alie ficlets #alie series: lukanette month 2019 #lukanette month 2019 #lukanette #luka x marinette #long post

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the-hype-dragon · 1 year

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about 200 pages into No Exit, which I bought last year after seeing the trailer for the movie adaptation

(this post is long and rambling)

let me preface this by saying I don't read a whole lot of thrillers because the genre doesn't impress me in general. I loved Red Dragon and Silence of the Lambs but I consider those horror novels instead of just straight thriller novels. for all I know No Exit is a very typical thriller but if all thrillers are written like this I will just go on being unimpressed by the genre

iirc I remember reading some review saying it was like a Stephen King book... correct. Taylor Adams makes as many Thing of the Cultural Moment references as King does, which instantly makes the book very dated. it was published in 2017 (though my paperback is copyrighted for 2019, so I was under the false impression it was much more recent lmao). there is a Pokemon Go! reference early on, a reference to the 2014 Godzilla movie, and a Max Payne (!!!) reference much later, all delivered in a very "how do u do fellow kids" kind of way lmao

also in typical King fashion the villains are so over the top they're unbelievable and the writing is about as subtle as a brick to your face

case in point: the symbolism is very in-your-face and not very clever. the author also enjoys smacking you in the face with "revelations" that are just "see I did a clever thing, reader!" In one scene the villains are kidnapping a child, the dumb one is wearing a zombie mask and the smart one is wearing a werewolf mask, because get it, the dumb one is the other villain's minion, and the smart one seemed good at first but he's really a monster in disguise do you get it

one of them saying he wanted to be a magician when he was a kid would have been clever foreshadowing if it was not similarly bashed over your head how clever the author found it lmao

the main character is equal parts kind of clever and very stupid, but her few smart moments rely entirely on the villains being too dumb to figure out that she would do something to try and fool them. yes even the smart one is too dumb to figure out when she is obviously playing them

on the positive side this book can be really funny and I feel like Adams actually has a decent sense of humor... the only problem is there are also moments that are funny in a way that feels very unintentional

somehow I am supposed to believe two other characters don't notice how evil the villains are or that they are unaware of things like three characters being absent all at once, multiple times. they are all stranded in a rest stop during a snowstorm btw

there are a couple moments where it feels like neither the author nor the editor read real closely because the protagonist has a thought and two seconds later (literally, a page-and-a-half later) the villain says the same thing and she acts like this is a huge revelation. gorl WHAT

in perhaps another sign of the book's "age" (it was published in 2017!) one of the bad guys is a porn addict and we are supposed to find this creepy... while I agree with this we have unfortunately entered an age where calling out a dude's porn addiction is seen as a hate crime lmao

I like the middle-aged side characters, they are charming in a typical "embarrassing middle aged people" kind of way. I could tell the book is written by a man when the (female) protagonist calls the older woman "frumpy" lmao

since I still have about 200 pages to go however (and I haven't looked at spoilers) I'm still holding out hope that a really dumb story one of the villains told very early in the book has some pay-off later. he got his thumb nearly amputated in a door hinge when he was a child so here's hoping some freak door hinge accident is what takes him out!!!

#rambling #book thoughts

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not-poignant · 6 years

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(this might be a bit personal, and by all means please don't feel pressured to answer) but considering how dark some of your stuff can get, have you ever been troubled by some of the characters/their actions in your stories (and semi-related) had to take some time to cope with writing a difficult scene?

This is a tough one so I’m going to put a lot of it under a read more (sorry phone browsers).

I’ve had the occasional moment of struggling with content because of being troubled by it.

But by contrast it’s funny because, I think some of the most difficult scenes for others, are actually some of the easiest for me to write. For example, the chapter where Connor is basically kidnapped by Gabriel and given the highball, was so easy to write it was like swimming (which is the only sports-like skill I’m good at). If everything could be like that, oh my goodness, I can’t even imagine. It was an intense, emotionally fraught, joyful experience of the likes I don’t know how to explain to other people who don’t experience that.

So there’s not always any rhyme or reason to it either. I struggled with significant chunks of Strange Sights. I couldn’t finish The Drawn Bead because it just felt like we were heading towards torture porn but I also knew I couldn’t do justice to the horror of Gwyn’s memory AND it has a tragic ending and I struggle to write those for longer pieces. I tend to struggle with characters being separated from each other. So the beginning of Into Shadows We Fall, when Jack and Pitch are completely separated from each other, that was so difficult for me personally, that I actually ended up massively shortening how long they were meant to be separated for. Even though Pitch and Jack have a really thorny relationship when Pitch is returned, I still preferred that to their being absent from each other.

But I didn’t have as much of a problem with it, when it was Gwyn and Augus.

It’s not predictable, sometimes I enjoy writing the troubling content on a very visceral level. Either because I feel like I’m in my element as a writer. Or I know it’s going to be so satisfying (for me) for the character to recover from it later. Or I know that it’s going to lead to something I’ve been craving writing. I mean I wouldn’t write so much of that kind of content if I didn’t get something really tangible out of it.

There are still things that surprise me, still scenes that become more difficult as I write them, not because of ‘technical writing reasons’ but because of the thematic content. Often, for me, it highlights things I probably won’t enjoy writing again. Strange Sights for me worked as a series of oneshots, but as a long-term abusive and rape-filled relationship, it didn’t actually become comfortable for me until Augus began to be allowed to have boundaries. So I probably won’t write a couple that toxic ever again outside of novellas and PWPs. With the beginning of Into Shadows We Fall, I learned I had to be really careful with character separation, and that three chapters was about my limit (from memory, I think I stuck to this - or just about - in COFT).

But...maybe it would make people feel better if I said I really struggled with writing Gavril taunting Jack. Or Jack being whipped by Bunnymund. Or Augus torturing him in chapter 4 of ISWF. Or Gwyn being tormented by his mother. Or Mosk having flashbacks of Davix and Olphix. I find them intense, sure, but I don’t dislike doing it. Even though I often really feel for the character who is experiencing the torment. Gwyn goes through a fairly graphic description an MRI the next chapter in SOTS, and though I myself actually had an MRI phobia for a few years (it was the reason I developed claustrophobia), I found the scene itself disturbing, but deeply satisfying enough that I wouldn’t call it something where I needed to take time out to cope.

As for me being troubled by how the characters are actually behaving... This is tricky. I mean of course a lot of them are doing stupid, terrible, harmful, cruel, illegal things. I don’t condone it in reality. But thinking of these things happening in fiction is different to thinking about them happening in reality. The fact is, ‘dubcon’ in reality is just rape, and if I applied real world standards to non-real scenarios filled with tropes and the Id, yeah sure, I would be troubled, but I’d also not be writing any of this content.

As an addendum to that, for me their behaviour always makes sense to me from their perspective. Whether it’s Mosk being emotionally abusive with no concept of it. Gwyn raping Augus. Augus killing Efnisien. Pitch in TGATNW being heartless and constantly pushing Jack away with very cruel behaviour. Even Davix and Olphix. Whatever their behaviour is, if I can understand their motives behind it, I tend to struggle with it a lot less.

I don’t like to squick myself with my own writing, as a general rule. So no, I’m not looking to write things where I need to take breaks from my own writing to cope. But I think to be blunt, my life is filled with things more challenging than what I put a lot of my characters through, and my emotional ability to handle disturbing behaviour is broader than I think it would be for some other people. It doesn’t mean I lack empathy or compassion, if anything I hope that through my writing, people can see that I have great compassion for the characters that often suffer the most, through my need to build up a chosen/found family around them, and pour love onto them, even if they don’t know what to do with it.

Those that are here in the pit of ‘enjoying Pia’s writing’ are probably here because the comfort when it comes is - I hope - tangible and visceral, the loneliness when it’s comforted away reaches past the screen and means something. And holding onto that thread myself is why I enjoy the hurt part of the hurt/comfort as much as the comfort part, but also why I don’t like to write one without the other.

And finally, most of my POV characters, by the time we get to them, have been through their darkest moments in their pasts. The only way we often access their worst moments is through flashbacks, memories, dialogue or their aversions. That might feel very extreme to some, but for me, it means by the time we get to them, they’re already starting to recover something for themselves. The worst has happened.

Even if they go through something during the story, say - Connor in Eversion with Gabriel - I just think ‘it’s okay, they’re already in the story, their support is there, they’re going to be okay.’ It’s...extremely rare for me to write stories where the character goes through their worst trauma within the story. Science of Fear is an exception to that, but as most people know if they’ve read it - Nathan blacks out early on, and then once more, we only find out the details of his worst trauma in the form of nightmares, flashbacks and dialogue.

That’s partly because I feel personally that I write trauma recovery stories, and not trauma stories (it doesn’t sound like a huge difference, but to me it’s a huge difference). And then secondly because there is a buffer through the trauma itself being in the form of a memory. That...makes it a lot easier for me to cope with. I’ve spent my entire life learning how to cope with flashbacks, after all. But also, even if the character is clearly destroyed by a flashback, the fact is, they survived it. The flashback is living proof they survived it.

But anyway, I’d say me taking breaks from my own writing because of disturbing content specifically doesn’t really happen anymore and I can’t remember the last time it did. I take breaks because I’m struggling with a chapter - i.e. how to write it mechanically, or because I feel like it doesn’t have the emotional strength I want it to have yet. I am actually very comfortable with many of the themes I write, I’d have a far squickier, grosser, harder time writing pregnancy, or a story filled with only fluff, which is y’know, why...I don’t really write those things, lol. I’m too much of a hedonist to want to write content that scared me away from my own content? Like, you do you, folks, but I’m going to be over here actually enjoying what I write, disturbing matter and all.

That doesn’t mean other people can’t have a hard time with it. It’s totally okay for people to take breaks from whatever they read, for whatever reason. And since a lot of the characters I write do engage in troubling behaviour, it wouldn’t be great if people said ‘that behaviour is okay to do in real life’ because it isn’t. But if someone said ‘god I love that villain because he’s awful’ then yeah, I’m right there with pom poms, because that’s my jam too. And if someone else said ‘I can’t stand that villain because he’s awful’ then yeah, that’s awesome as well.

And if people need to take breaks while reading what I’m writing because they’re engaging in self-care, then good! I’ve needed to do the same with other people’s writing. Because the journey of the reader is different to the journey of the writer (this is for me, truest when writing porn, lmao, I’m not turning myself on when I write those scenes, but I sure as hell hope I’m turning on at least some readers --> so if I’m not walking away from the disturbing content in my own writing, that doesn’t mean I’m not hoping people won’t be disturbed when reading it).

#asks and answers #personal #pia on writing #pia on fanfiction #i feel like someone else could've summed this up in three sentences #instead of like two thousand words #but here we are #with the rambling fool of 2019 #administrator Gwyn wants this in the queue #Anonymous

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