#workplace toxicity being a universal thing

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

THIS SHOW

Can we talk about how they are literally not wasting a single frame in the storytelling? It's short, but so damn effective.

I've talked before about how this is not just a story about individuals, but about existing within a fucked up system.

It's about how we get accustomed to terrible treatment, because we exist in a space where everyone sees it as normal.

And those who realize it's not normal, those who try to push back, don't tend to last.

But once they're gone, we realize how much they (and their ability to see the truth) were protecting us from things being the absolute worst.

How our acceptance of this kind of life and workplace perpetuates the cycle for the new people as they come in.

And though we think we are only martyring ourselves, it results in the sacrifice of others. Because in our choices for ourselves, we are helping to feed them to the machine.

But it's still so hard to walk away, because you become so numb to it all. Until you are sure that parts of you are permanently broken.

And you also know that these systems are everywhere, they are our society, so who's to say you could ever find anything better?

It's the slow crushing of the soul, that makes you feel like it all could just be so futile.

Which is why what Kai is doing is so brilliant here.

He's not denying the reality of the world they exist in. He's not being pushy or angry about Hiro's choices.

Instead Kai is utilizing temptation, showing that there are things, some of them quite simple, that can bring joy. That can break through the futility.

That prove that you can still feel.

But you have to choose them. Because like all things in this life, they are ephemeral.

The systems might not go anywhere in our lifetimes, but that doesn't mean the choices we make don't matter. For ourselves - and for those who see us do it.

[kuromochimi]

baby I’m nothing like your broke ex

gojo satoru, nanami kento

Content warnings: mentions of past toxic relationships, not proof read

🔜 suguru geto, kamo choso, higuruma hiromi

Gojo Satoru

Satoru was rich. Like rich RICH. You first noticed this the moment you met him when you spilled coffee on his shirt then offered to buy him a new one instead. Instant regret when you realized that his shirt was worth more than your entire closet combined.

Being in a relationship with him was… well it was an adjustment. You lived a fairly simple life before you met him. It wasn’t a bad life. You still got to spend on your wants here and there but you had to budget such things much like any other common person had to. On the other hand, the word budget was non-existent to satoru especially when it came to you. He quite literally gave you everything. A few weeks into the relationship though, he had noticed how reluctant you were to accept his presents. You didn’t seem uncomfortable, just.. reluctant. He toned down a bit after this realization. But god he just couldn’t figure out why you were almost unwilling to accept anything at all from him, even food, even a ride home, even his hoodie which he already said you could keep. “Baby” he called to which you responded by looking his way. “Why do you never want to accept my presents?” He asked before he got up to approach you, immediately hugging you from the back as soon as you were within reach. “Hmm it’s not that I don’t want to.. it’s just.. you have to let me get used to these things first, okay?” satoru raised his brow “baby I know that shitty ex of yours can’t come close to how much I spoil you but was he that stingy?” at first satoru was only joking but your silence meant it was probably true. “So he was?” He asked as his chin was resting on your shoulder. “Come on satoru, he’s a thing of the past. He doesn’t matter anymore, ‘kay?” You tried your best to steer away from having to tell your boyfriend in detail but he’s right. Your ex was stingy as hell. It’s not like you ever asked for anything too much in fact, you don’t ever remember asking for anything at all. All the times he had to pick you up, he asked for gas money which seemed fair enough but it wasn’t just that. The man loved going on and extravagant dates but was never willing to fish out more than gas money. He adored receiving presents from you but could never be bothered to get you even the cheapest flowers. He used to say that he was just saving up to be able to give you the life you deserve but 8 years of having to sustain the luxurious lifestyle of a bum just made you snap hence, the break up. Satoru’s tightening embrace woke you from that little flashback. “Okay baby, I’ll make sure to spoil you but don’t hesitate to tell me if I go overboard hm? Love you” he gave you a kiss on the cheek and god, you felt so lucky to have found such a good man.

Nanami Kento

It quite literally took years of yearning for nanami to be finally able to date you. He was your junior in university and your junior at work as well. All that time, he had to witness you be head over heels for your then boyfriend, another one of his seniors. He thought the man might have put a spell on you because for the love of god, he could not see what kept you with the jerk for so long. Having observed your relationship from when he was a college freshman up to when he was a work colleague, your ex never even tried to mask how selfish he was with you. The man dawned expensive watches and drove a not so cheap car, he loved going to expensive places with his friends but with you? He wouldn’t hesitate to pass you the bill (like 85% of the time) whenever you went on dates, bought you nothing but cheap jewelry and quality reject flowers just because they were cheaper. Even worse, he also let you take the crowded train home everyday despite him driving to and from work everyday. He just couldn’t be bothered to pick you up because your workplace was “too far” and gas was expensive. If he really was struggling, it wouldn’t have been a problem but any person could see that he was more than capable of treating you better. He just didn’t want to.

Dating nanami was like a breath of fresh air. It’s not like you were materialistic in the first place but receiving pretty flowers and having someone make sure you’s comfortable and safe felt so heartwarming. On top of that, nanami didn’t make it feel like he was obligated to do any of that. He just genuinely wanted to care for you. It was all new to you that you even had to ask him to stop spoiling you too much, you felt bad accepting all that he was giving. “I know you don’t need them and I know you’re capable but let me do these things for you, hm?” Was what he’d always say and despite bot being able to voice it out to him yet, there is so much love in you knowing that it was possible to be treated this way. With so much care and love and concern.

[gigidragonbbxxx]

success story

"The opposite happening in the 3D does not mean you are not getting your desires. It could probably be part of the "how"."

I just wanted to tell a story from one of my own friends in the law of assumption community. afaik, she does not have a tumblr. I will be either changing details or keeping things vague for privacy but this story is true and just happened last week.

The quote I have above is a paraphrase from Dylan James. I don't listen to everything he says and sometimes I have conflicting opinions BUT I appreciate the knowledge that does resonate with me and when I came across this saying it had me thinking: how is this true?

Well, I got my answer.

My friend lives in Seattle. She's from a European country and here for work and school. Her sponsorship for her green card was through her work. My friend is a master manifester. She's manifested men, her move to the States, people repeating her affs back to her. She had been affirming for a while that she made a certain salary (six figures so let's just keep it at $100,000).

My friend would keep affirming "I love my job and I make 100,000"

The reality was that her workplace environment was toxic as fuck and she wasn't being paid what she deserved but bc of her green card, she wouldn't be able to leave.

BUT GUYS. What do we always affirm?

Everything and anything will MOVE and BEND for me to get what I want.

This past week my friend got fired and of course, she freaked out.

So what did she do? Did she spiral?

no reader. she's a master manifester. she cried while affirming. she cried as she listened to aff tapes. she kept on affirming. she sent me voice notes rampaging.

SHE WAS STRESSED BUT SHE PERSISTED.

and guess what unfolded?

she found a dream job that paid exactly what she wanted, had better working conditions, AND she found a lawyer who saw a great loophole for her green card. i can't elaborate further regarding that.

the funny part is her being fired versus her quitting meant she had to get a severance package so she's getting paid as she's settling into her new job.

her losing her job = the way for the universe to give her the new one

THE OPPOSITE HAPPENING DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE NOT GETTING WHAT YOU WANT THIS IS PERSISTING!!!

PERSIST.

xx, gigi

[nayatarot777]

Karma For Your Toxic Ex-Friend

I feel like this reading is going to be full of some shit, so brace yourselves 😂

Pile One

Your toxic ex-friend is going to experience other people feeling the need to protect themselves from this person. This person believes that they find good luck through others but they’re going to experience a bunch of defensiveness from those who are around them. This person is being bullied within a workplace too. Most likely from coworkers - people who they have to work in a team with for the sake of their financial or material stability. They’re going to need healing from this situation. Their intentions are to work with others for their own benefit but instead, they’re going to experience the feeling of needing to recuperate from these people. They’re going to feel (and be viewed) as being naive. They’re going to feel like others underestimate them or view them as someone who’s underdeveloped in terms of maturity.

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Pile Two

Your toxic ex-friend is experiencing spiritual attack. Either baneful magic or strong evil eye. Their secrets are being exposed thanks to this. Secrets related to things that they feel extremely vulnerable and ashamed about. They’re going to be burnt by something that they initiate themselves into. This could be them inserting themselves into another person’s conversation or conflict, leading to someone exposing them in retaliation. This negative energy towards them could be sent by a group of people (up to three people). Just like Pile One, this could definitely happen in a workplace or in a group of people who they need to work alongside for money or materialistic stability. An earthy masculine energy is coming out here which is going to be the person who really serves them their justice. This masculine has a lot of money and financial power. But the energy of karma is definitely coming through to balance the scales for this person. They’re going to be forced to admit to a truth because this truth will be exposed against their will.

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Pile Three

This person is going to be overburdened af. As a result, this mf is AGING. They’re going to be looking way older than they actually are with all types of wrinkles and shit. These burdens are due to work and demands of those around them. And these burdens are only getting worse. They’re intensifying to the point where they’re becoming extremely exhausted and stagnant within their life. They’re feeling trapped and unable to move forward onto newer paths. Their energetic strength is going to feel broken. Their ego too. Their life is getting more and more rigid and burdensome. This is mad fucked up 😂 because it seems like they felt like their burdens were coming to an end - until the universe intensified that shit and added more onto their plate. “Not so fast, bitch.” 💀

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[chaifootsteps]

Chai do you think any of the spindlehorse employees find it weird that their boss doesn’t seem to comprehend what Quid Pro Quo even is? Maybe some have expressed it to you, who knows. And needs it explained to her that sexual misconduct in the workplace is bad, not funny, it’s not tragic just for the abuser cause he’s lonely, and isn’t a good basis for a “soulmates” relationship? Did anybody animating Look My Way not have a moment of clarity ‘hey this plot is a little disgusting actually’ ?

Also. Wow. Helluva boss’ “romance” story is actually so toxic that it’s the reason I learned the term for this type of sexual abuse and how to recognise it in the workplace. It’s (unintentionally) told with the type of subtlety Valentino and Angel Dusts story needed. Moments of kindness but also immediate backhanded remarks, power plays, grand romantic gestures mixed with scathing ones and physical boundaries pushed, and just overall confusing behaviour. Like the constant whiplash when stolas appeared in truth seekers. The victim doubting their own memory and his friends saying it’s all in his head.

For others though, younger audiences who love gay ships in any media just for the sake of it being gay, it’s just conditioning them to see it as quirky or the responsibility of the victim to “set the record straight” and negotiate out of sex.

People are actually using it as an example of what coercion is when asked what it is, and many people say it’s taught them how to recognise abuse in their relationship. This is what “stolitz” could have been. A cautionary tale. Stolas and Valentino guilt tripping their employees using various tactics is also educational. Funny enough, if this show gave a damn about its audience that would’ve been a scene in the show, Blitzø convinces himself he’s just in “love” and even with even Millie backing this up, naively finding it cute (being a meta stand in for shippers who don’t really pay attention) Moxxie in discomfort smiles a and says nothing out of fear, and then Loona shows him a info website that even has the term “quid pro quo” in writing for the audience to see and sits down to explain to him he is very much experiencing Stockholm syndrome and abuse. Hell, this crystal thing is just the ‘flowers and chocolates’ part of the abuse cycle.

And I don’t want to go there again but the fact Viv projects onto stolas and Brandon relates to Blitzø a lot when writing him, and the fact Viv shoe horned in that romance in a way he wasn’t in a position to object to since she’s the showrunner? Eerily similar to the characters in universe power dynamic? Yeah that’s a little nightmarish.

Oh lord, remember those days when we all thought that that's exactly where all of this was leading...Blitz being hit with the realization that he is to his employees what Stolas is to him?

Seems like a lifetime ago now.

[dw-humps-n-snarkives]

My two cents at the Johnto discourse since "complexity" is at play here:

1. The audio has explicitly called back on the imagery of mirrors representing the fact that the events that took place in this particular audio is an alternate timeline. Everything in this audio did not happen in TV Torchwood's canon.

(Although, I'm one of the people that don't believe in canon when it comes to the Whoniverse, but we're speaking in narratives here. You can argue that TV John is still capable of doing such things considering what transpired in the episodes involving him, but there's still a particular part of his character that we tend to overlook which I will be picking up at #5).

2. You are ALLOWED to be uncomfortable with the contents of this audio as you can with many other forms of media and many types of fandom. This audio was an experimental approach to Torchwood as a whole, John is Jack's narrative foil and his character is supposed to show that "this is what would happen if Captain Jack Harkness never attempted to be the better person in any chance he gets."

Jack is not a good person, but he's not inherently evil either. John is definitely not a good person, you could say he's Jack's evil counterpart, but you can still see a sense of humanity in John's character especially when you see him interact with Jack.

(See: The latter portion of TDOCJ when Jack realized that John went back to him because he wanted to stop the universe from collapsing, the entirety of Peach Blossom Heights in The Sins of Captain John, and smidges of dialogue between the two where John's behavior can be easily labelled as "a crazy and clingy ex.")

3. Ianto wasn't the only one who suffered in John's reign in the audio (I know that sounds horrible since I'm putting him aside but bear with me here, he'll have the whole portion after this).

Gwen was coerced to have sex with John and it immediately moves to the part of the timeline where John deliberately killed Gwen, John killing Rhys when he was (understandably) upset with not being informed that his girlfriend died, Tosh was literally treated as a disposable, and you could barely get anything from Owen since he was only mentioned once.

What Ianto went through is undoubtably SA. The way John toyed with Ianto is completely unacceptable and it should not be glorified, romanticized, or repeated in any way, shape, or form. That being said, as a fellow polycule Ianto, Jack, and John enjoyer, this audio is definitely NOT the sole reason why people ship Johnto, or conjure ship content involving John.

I'd like to refer you to this post involving Ianto's many horrible non-consensual happenings in his relationships throughout every Torchwood timeline out there (with Ianto ALWAYS being the victim). John and Ianto's relationship in this audio is also the potential outcome of "if Jack and Ianto's relationship were to be more toxic and unethical in the workplace" (and their relationship in TV Torchwood was hardly on equal grounding, too).

A VERY IMPORTANT ADDITIONAL NOTE:

I'm not stating that Jack and Ianto's relationship should be seen in a negative light, pointing out the flaws and toxic traits of a relationship doesn't make their love for each other and entire relationship any less valid. Their relationship is complicated and that's normal, I'm only pointing out the power imbalance in Jack and Ianto's relationship when viewing it in a workplace setting (being Torchwood).

Said power imbalance doesn't mean I'm ignoring the choice of both Jack and Ianto to start and keep the relationship going as they are both consenting adults, whatever problems that may cause between and outside them will follow (it's just unfortunate that in Ianto's story, he always gets involved in fucked up arrangements in his relationships because of Torchwood, whether platonic, familial, or romantic).

4. Creating ships and pairs that could potentially be toxic for either or both parties is not a new concept. If done right, liking complicated ships and pairs only means you find the dynamic, the narrative, and/or the reaction between each persons interesting, it could even be used as a study for people who are interested in making a story because stories cannot exist without conflict. This also means you don't actively support the good or bad things about a ship or a narrative, that's the point of having an audience in the first place: members of fandoms are meant to criticize the source, whether it's in a positive or negative way, because people find a way to make something new out of it in the most creative way possible. That's what fandom is.

5. Captain John Hart as a character was never meant to be taken too seriously in the first place. His behavior in The Sins of Captain John proves as such, and using him at TDOCJ was a perfect way of presenting the exaggerated "what-if" situation as he perfectly thrives in parodies and he thrives in the purest form of pettiness and unfiltered, somewhat childishly edgy entertainment. No doubt, he's a murderous, selfish asshole, but liking a villain character doesn't reflect your character as the viewer and consumer of the character's content (See: The Master).

Remember that this is Torchwood, the show where everyone is capable of doing the most unethical and immoral thing to get to their objective, and Captain John Hart and Ianto Jones are not exempted from such influence.

Most importantly, always handle discourse in a civilized manner. Coming after people while making a point will become futile as there will be no discussion made when someone gets hurt.

You're allowed to critcize the content, but don't judge the people who enjoy it. Appreciating a supposedly problematic ship does not reflect on their overall humanity.

[ryuichirou]

I love your Sultan AU so much, how it shows Jamil and Kalim 5 years into the future! How do you see the other NRC guys in the future after they graduate? I'm just curious

Thank you, Anon! <3 I am very happy you like it! I really hope we’ll have more content for this AU in the future, but then again, that’s me with every AU…

We haven’t thought about other students in this universe specifically, we might come up with stuff as we go, so nothing of what I’m about to say is concrete yet. I also won’t write about every single character, just about the ones that come to mind more easily…

First of all, when it comes to Octavinelle and Ignihyde guys, there might be a crossover situation lol, maybe the AzuIde marriage AU or the Mafia AU exist in the same universe at this one. Age-wise, the second option fits more, I guess, but I’m still thinking that it’s the first one. In any case, they are definitely up to no good with Azul working hard on his rapidly growing business, with the Tweels helping him out and Idia being forced to help out too in his own way. Ortho is always by Idia’s side, no matter the AU. But he also might pursue his passion for movie-making in some ways, as least as a hobby.

(Azul also definitely does business with the Asim family, so the Octa-trio and Kalim+Jamil are still in touch, even though they don’t talk on a regular basis)

Speaking of movies, Vil’s future is pretty easy to determine. He works harder than ever, and has his own set of problems: his perfectionism has never left him; he is a workaholic that finds it difficult to slow down and relax. The industry is also as toxic as ever, so with every big win he also gets a ton of new things to fight. But he’s doing his best, as always, even though this job quite literally drives him insane, despite how much he loves it, both acting and make-up production and other project he does.

Rook and Vil are still together, but Rook also pursuits his own thing, whatever it is. It’s hard to say what the hell Rook’s doing: he is still quite an enigma of a person; even Vil doesn’t know for sure (probably something shady, so Vil doesn’t really want to know). Rook also keeps hinting that Vil shouldy ditch all of his big projects and try directing an indie movie.

Riddle is also overworked and overstressed: despite the fact that he really wanted to become a lawyer when he was still at NRC, he did end up becoming a magical doctor like his parents wanted him to. He decided that it was the right thing to do, not only because of his parents, but also because this is such an important occupation only the most brilliant mages can handle. So right now he spends the majority of his time either studying medical literature or practicing at a very prestigious magical clinic, and he knows that he should be feeling proud of himself and satisfied because of doing something he was meant to do, but he can’t shake off this feeling of disappointment and emptiness. Thus, at some point he began to also study law whenever he has free time for that, and that makes him much happier. But the drawback of it is that he has literally no time to talk to any of his friends anymore, it’s like he defaulted to his pre-NRC situation. Trey (who is a pastry chef btw, we know he would be one) is very concerned but can’t do much about it, although he is one of the few people from the NRC Riddle still talks to occasionally.

Ironically, another person Riddle talks to from time to time is Floyd, because he accidentally found out where Riddle works and now visits him from time to time just to mess with him.

Deuce is also kind of disappointed in how things are going at his workplace (the Magical Police department): he realised that it’s much more corrupt than he expected it to be. He hangs out with Ace every day, and Ace always talks about how naive Deuce is and that no one is going to take him seriously if he keeps being so stupidly earnest and hardworking instead of just making “right” friends and bribing his way into the elite squad. It pisses Deuce off, because he knows that Ace is right, and also hearing that from someone who doesn’t really have a job is annoying.

Ace doesn’t have a job because he had a fight with his boss and left. So now he spends his days sleeping, providing hot takes for every situation, earning some money by doing magic tricks aaaand probably gambling.

Hmm, I also think all the first-year boys still talk to each other quite regularly even if they don’t live in the same area. Epel surely visits Deuce and Ace at least every couple of weeks, Jack probably does too. Sebek is less likely to do that though, he is way too busy.

It’s kind of difficult to say anything about Diasomnia, so I’ll leave them out for now. Leona is doing his Leona thing, probably still complaining about not being appreciated. I don’t know what Cater does, but I hope he is happy? He might be an influencer of sorts, but he’s usually a loner that becomes visibly animated when he reunites with his college friends. He is also definitely away from his family.

So yeah everyone has issues lol The only one who is 1000% thriving is Ruggie. Things are going well for Ruggie. Good for Ruggie! He deserved it.

Ehh, I think that’s all for now. It took so long to write this reply for some reason, but I hope reading it was somewhat fun.

Thank you for your question again <3

[zodiactalks]

Top 4 EGOMANIACS Zodiac Signs

It doesn’t hurt to have an ego. Unless it’s taken too far.

No one likes when they meet an egomaniac. They are charming at first, but it quickly becomes obvious that they have an unrealistic self-image.

Sure, they may be good, but they aren’t that good. If they were, there would be no need to say so. Everyone would know.

These types of people are usually found in walks of life where they aren’t succeeding as they wish they were. It leads down a road of bitterness and spite. And gives them one of two attitudes. 

I can’t do better than this. Or I’m too good for this.

Both of which are bad when taken to extremes. 

Let’s take a look at the top four zodiac signs likely to be egomaniacs.

#1. Capricorn

Capricorn knows they can do amazing things in life. But often feel like the universe is conspiring to keep them in a cycle of struggling instead.

This belief can hurt Capricorn and cause anger to boil within them. They feel attacked at every turn. And they are too good to deserve it.

If these types of thoughts continue with no progress toward the individual Capricorns vision of success, it will become toxic. 

Capricorn can believe they are predestined for great things. They can be prone to having a god-complex given their personality and life experiences. 

It can look like arrogance at the simplest of things. Acting as if they were incapable of failing. And denial if they do fail at something. It hurts Capricorn’s ego to appear weak when they present as an egomaniac.

A small dose of self-worth is healthy. A victim mindset and a belief in one’s superiority is not. 

#2. Scorpio

Scorpio knows they are the most capable person in the room. This is why they spend their time looking down their nose at everyone else.

Scorpio is the original inventor of the god-complex. 

There is something inside Scorpio that convinces them they are just better than everyone around them. Even if there is no palpable proof of that. 

It can cause Scorpio to become flustered when they are asked to perform a task that they aren’t amazing at. Scorpio can be in denial about how good they really are or aren’t at something. 

Which can lead them to freeze instead of act on the tasks in front of them. Why should they have to prove themselves?

Other people who may have admired Scorpio for their mystery vibe may get turned off by this attitude. No one wants to be around someone who is all talk and all arrogance.

A healthy Scorpio can back up what they claim. And they are good at what they do. Scorpio will tend to specialize and truly become a master at their chosen course when they find their purpose.

#3. Aquarius

Despite Aquarius’ good intentions, they tend to believe that they know what is best for others. 

This can lead others to view Aquarius as arrogant and a control freak. Micromanaging can become an issue in the workplace if Aquarius is a boss.

Whether or not Aquarius is aware of their tendency to be overbearing depends on the individual. A healthy Aquarius is able to manage others without feeling the need to correct every detail. 

They are able to see all the angles and make suggestions. Which allows their employees to carry out creative solutions on their own. 

But when Aquarius latches onto the belief that only they know best is when it gets dicey. It can cause Aquarius to become controlling to the point that they’d rather do everything themselves. 

And they will. 

Aquarius will take over every single role until they burn themselves out. This zodiac sign can benefit from being an independent contractor without employees. It allows them the control they want. 

#4. Aries

Aries believe they should be in charge all the time, no questions asked.

Obviously, this won’t go over well with many others. This is something Aries is constantly advised to work on. Regardless of that, Aries still wants to be in charge.

If Aries was asked if they were an egomaniac, they likely wouldn’t think so. They truly believe they are born to manage other people. If they can’t do that, then they’d rather take on the world solo. 

At least then they’d be in control.

Aries is an all-or-nothing zodiac sign. They are willing to go to the end of the earth for their followers. When given the right followers. 

Aries doesn’t mind being challenged, but they do mind their leadership being questioned. A healthy Aries is able to differentiate the two, while an unhealthy one will take offense to both.

When Aries is on your side though, they will defend you forever.

[weepylucifer]

Esprit de Corps and Inland Empire >:)))

inland empire: if video game Disco Elysium was put in a hydraulic press. if it was bundled and squeezed into a small object that fit in the palm of your hand. what would that look like? what would you do with it, then?

it'd look like a cubical object in scintillating metallic colors and patterns, and images of the locations and characters shimmering across the surface. i would use it as a fidget toy and have it in my hands whenever i need something to occupy them while i read kapital. i would also take it in my mouth

esprit de corps: what are your feelings about the RCM?

oh boy deep breath. under cut because it got long

The RCM is a glorified neighborhood watch. The RCM is old communists trying to trick the Moralintern into letting them stay organized. The RCM are pigs and bastards and bootlickers. The RCM has failed its purpose. The RCM is working exactly as designed. The RCM are trying to protect citizens. The RCM are actively ruining lives. The RCM are gonna back the revolution. The RCM are gonna squash the revolution. No one trusts the RCM and they are right not to. The RCM are doing what they can with what they have. The RCM are just another gang in a city of gangs. The RCM are a sworn brotherhood. The RCM are a vile, toxic, soul-sucking tar pit of a workplace. The RCM are a bunch of delusional weirdos clinging to a figment of legitimacy and “law” that was handed to them by the oppressors. The RCM come from the people. It’s wild out here

The thing about them is that i can absolutely see the in-universe "RCM = ICM + 4 decades of time" theory being true. I can absolutely believe that people in there, like Pryce, are trying to organize another push for independence, and maybe even communism. But the thing is, most people have forgotten all about this, and there are no communards in the RCM anymore (even Pryce is the son of the original Pryce). So by now they're pretty much just the police, not much more to it. They've recruited anyone off the street, which means they've recruited a ton of people with the Cop Mindset, who were drawn to the opportunity to play around with guns and exert authority over defenseless civilians. When the Return comes, the RCM will collapse like a poorly made soufflé, and i do not doubt that we would have seen that in a sequel if there'd been one. There would have been a split into the "serve the people by joining the uprising" camp and the "keep being cops by enforcing moralintern law and suppressing the uprising" camp, and the former would be in for some interesting times

in coup attempts, it can be beneficial to have (para-)military on-side, because they're many, they're armed, and they're trained for combat, and you'd probably prefer them with you than shooting at you. but the people hate the RCM, and the unions hate the RCM, and there are good reasons for that, so for many it would be unacceptable to have cops at the table. plus, from what we've seen of Precinct 41, you do NOT want those bozos in charge of ANYTHING, and you do NOT want a Return that just ends up enforcing police rule. what Pryce and whoever people he has would do when confronted with that, it would remain to be seen

[lillsisamarshmallow]

WIPs

Note: I may change and remove things from this list as i keep writing

My current work in progresses...

BNHA

BNHA characters when you're depressed

'Midoriya Izuku version'

Midoriya Izuku x Reader

Genre: Scenario, Fluff, Caretaker!Izuku, Comfort

Warnings: Depression, a bit of anxiety, self isolation, overall bad mental health,

85% Complete

BTS

A Bouquet of Poisons

Mafia!BTS x Reader

Genre: Series, Mafia Au, Romance, Action, Crime, Angst, Fluff.

Warnings: Blood, Gore, Violence, Weapons, Poison, Swearing, Mu*der, Kidnapping, Blackmail, drinking, Angst, Fluff, Past bullying, Brief mental health talk.

Description: After stumbling upon a private meeting in her local bakery, Y/n is kidnapped and whisked into a world full of crime where she has to do her best to survive and out wit the people out to get her. Will the 7 members of the brutal Bangtang mafia be her saviours, or her destroyers?

15% Complete

The Love Game

Campus Bad boy!Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Oneshot, College Au, Fluff, Angst.

Warnings: Oneshot, Slightly suggestive, Toxic relationship, ex!boyfriend, fake relationship, Swearing.

Description: When Y/n's Ex-Boyfriend starts flaunting his new girlfriend only weeks after their messy breakup, she decided to get her revenge. Asking the campus bad boy to play a game, a love game. and he might just owe her a favour.

5% Complete.

Needs a name

Werewolf!Jungkook x Detective!Reader

Genre: Oneshot, Werewolf Au, Detective Au, Predator

Warnings: Gore, Dead bodies, Blood, Swearing, weapons, corrupt police force, sexism in the work place

Description: When mangled and maimed bodies start appearing in her town, Y/n, the head detective, is tasked with solving the mysterious case. On her mission to solve this case, Y/n may have wished that wasn't chosen to lead the investigation, as she might just become a victim to these horrid murders herself.

1% Complete

Needs a Name

Tattoo Artist!Yoongi x Florist!Reader

Genre: Oneshot, AU, Fluff, Strangers to Lovers

Warnings: Needles, Pet names, Subtle flirting

Description: Two people who looked like they were from two completely different universes, in reality they were just from opposite sides of the same street. Y/n often finds herself staring into the shop across the street from her, the dark exterior and the grungy interior being completely different from her bright floral flower shop. One day a piece of the darkness finds his way into her store.

5% Complete

Accidental Marriage

Principal!Jimin x Teacher!Reader

Genre: Oneshot, , Fake Marriage kind of, Miscommunication,

Warnings: Messy kids, Workplace relationship, Nosey soccer moms

Description: When Y/n’s students rope both her and her boss into their games, they do their best to go along with it, but what happens when people start believing the stories of her cheeky 3rd grade class?

0% Complete

Rivals in Disguise

Spy!Seokjin x Spy!Reader

Genre: Oneshot, Spy Au, Enemies to Lovers,

Warnings: Swearing, violence

Description: When Y/n's missions keep falling apart due to the rogue who keeps stepping her up, her boss decides to get her to work with a partner. But why cant Y/n shake how familiar his voice sounds?

0% Complete

The Merman's Pirate

Merman!Hoseok x Pirate!Reader

Genre: Oneshot, Pirate AU, Mermaid AU

Warnings: Drinking, Unhygienic places, Drowning

Description: Captain Y/n and her crew make doc at Tortuga, leaving her ship in the hands of her first mate she makes off to find the treasure for her map. Alone in a cave, until she spots another, struck by the beauty of the man in front of her, until she caught sight of the shimmering, flowing, long tail, it wasn't a man at all.

5% Complete

Needs a name

Mafia!Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Oneshot, Enemies to Lovers

Warnings, Violence, Weapons, Threats, Death, Kidnapping, Hostage situation

Description: Y/n finds herself in the hands of a dangerous mafia boss after her night out. Kidnapped and forced to live with a ruthless, cunning, and very annoying mafia boss, Y/n does her best to get out of the situation whilst also pissing off the man holding her captive With tensions growing between the two, what happens when Y/n's past catches up to her and she is forced to protect someone?

0% Complete

[sosaspiels]

Life is Strange: Double Exposure looks interesting. It is good to see Max back, but based on Deck Nine's creations of True Colors and Before the Storm, I have my doubts when it comes to Double Exposure living up to the original Life is Strange game.

Before the Storm was really boring and cringy to me; it wasn't bad, but I would not like to play it again ever in my lifetime.

True Colors was better but still not up to the standards Life is Strange 1 and 2 set.

I feel that it is just something in the essence of Dontnod that is missing in these newer Life is Strange games.

Life is Strange 1 set up a nostalgic and cozy environment filled with what seemed to be purposely archetypal American high school characters. The dialogue was gawdy at times, but fitting as an exaggeration of early-to-mid 2010s slang, especially for the northwestern internet-grown millenial 'hipsters' that Max and Chloe were presented to be.

Life is Strange 2 was quite inconsistent when it came to the themes and ideas of individual episodes, but stood out as an ambitious video game that not only put more effort into making itself a "Choices Matter" experience, but also covered controversial themes like anti-immigrant sentiment [specifically] in the early Trump era of 2016 (though it was sometimes a bit exaggerated for the sake of proving a point).

This is a rare instance of where I hope a game development team strays far away from its usual ideas. However, the trailer does not seem to make that apparent.

It will be interesting to see how they approach the Sacrifice Chloe or Arcadia Bay endings, as they mentioned Max being able to jump through 'parallel universes' or something of the sort. It is a bit ironic how the game does seem to be set in the Sacrifice Chloe ending while the plot is centered around Max trying to save a murdered friend with her powers.

Wait. This plot mirrors Life is Strange 1 more than I imagined.

The trailer gave off the same 'imitation of Life is Strange 1's small town vibe' just like True Colors. But what I just realized is that the premise is based around Max attempting to save the life of a friend murdered (for unclear reasons) with her rewinding ability -- just like the premise of the first game.

Chloe is murdered by Nathan for reasons unknown, and Max rewinds (awakening her power) to discover the motive behind her murder while also uncovering a larger conspiracy in Arcadia Bay.

Max's friend in this trailer is murdered by someone unknown for what seems to be reasons unknown, and Max rewinds (using her power for the first time in ages) to discover the motive behind her murder while also probably uncovering a larger conspiracy in her town because that is the same exact thing that happened in Life is Strange: True Colors.

I still have faith in you, Deck Nine! The news about Nazi symbols being hidden in this game was concerning (among claims of a toxic and harassment-filled workplace), but I still hope the team was able to move through such a heinous trouble and come out of it with an amazing piece of work.

Please, I beg of you!

[sarasade]

I LOVE learning about the prodution of Steven Universe and animation production in general. SU podcast is a brilliant resource for learning about how American animation gets made. Say what you want about Hazbin Hotel but the talent behind it is some of the most interesting people in American animation. I love this interview with the story board artist specialising on Angel Dust. He is also a sex worker and has some extremely insightful things to say about the character. The Dragon Prince behind-the-scenes stuff doesn't really do it for me. I'm usually interested in seeing that sort of production stuff but there are some reasons why I'm not that into it here:

To be completely honest Women of Woderstorm really soured the things for me when it comes to the co-founder of Wonderstorm Aaron Ehasz.

Those who don't know: three women accused Ehasz of workplace misconduct in 2020 and then left the company (repost of Ehasz's rather condescending PR statement about the controversy. Very Deck Nine if you ask me). Definitely a stain in TDP's reputation as a progressive show. While being (an alleged) shitty boss and engaging in toxic and sexist behaviour doesn't mean that you can't create beautiful art, I just really am not that interested in his opinions. Like, is this the guy I want to listen to when it comes to inclusivity and representation? I sincerely hope that things at Wonderstorm have improved. All the people working there clearly just want to do their job and do it well.

2. I've checked out YouTube interviews and various podcasts and it's almost always Ehasz in the interviews with the voice cast. Okay there are some interviews with the other writers but not that many. Like I get it, the VAs are great for promotion. Nothing wrong with that. But they don't write the show or even choose which lines end up in the show, the voice acting director does that as far as I know. In general I feel like it's pretty hard to find interviews with the storyboard artists or 3D modelers etc.

[starofhisheart]

Some rambling abt god in the good omens universe:

I like the idea that the metatron and god r at odds bc the metatron got corrupted and abused his authority as the voice of god but then what abt god? Why has she let it just go on? Maybe there's something that blocks her from intervening herself? Or more likely she doesnt care bc she's just as corrupt or rather doesn't see humans in the same way. 1 thing that sticks out is the Job incident in s2. I think she's so out of touch and doesnt see humans as anything more than her playthings. And why wouldnt she? She's set herself up as this all powerful being who designed pretty much a lego town, seeing humans as pieces on a chessboard that she can use her angels and demons to influence in the way she wants.

In terms of aziracrow I thought from the voice over in s1 that she clearly knew about them meeting up and perhaps even wanted it to happen but then s2 threw a curve ball and now I'm not so sure. It doesnt line up with what we know about her. I'm so curious what will come of it in s3. With zira going back to heaven perhaps we'll learn more abt it and God herself. Perhaps we'll even get a scene of Zira confronting her and getting cast out like Crowley.

Honestly the whole god and heaven thing reminds me of a toxic workplace. The boss (god) may not have their hand in every thing that goes on (in heaven) but as the boss they basically cosign all the behaviour and is the main person who should take the blame.

[pixies-and-poets]

2022

This past year was the best I’ve had in ages, by a long shot. I decided to get some thoughts out, and this is mainly for my personal benefit to record this moment in time, but if anyone is curious you can read through. I hope you can share a little bit of my happiness, and that the next year is as good for you as this one was for me.

Now to set the scene: at the beginning of 2022 I was mostly feeling lost, aimless, depressed. BUT I had two creative projects which gave me some grounding and direction: my ongoing webcomic, the current spinoff story of which started in mid-2021, and... the D&D campaign I was in the midst of with my friends; the one and only successful long-term tabletop campaign I’ve ever been involved with. Although it was still relatively short, each one of its seventeen sessions was packed with hilarious and memorable moments. At the time it was, in addition to the comic, my greatest creative passion and my major light in the darkness. I was in charge of recording the sessions’ audio, listening through them again so I could write them up as a narrative, and I also did lots of illustrations as a bonus. It was only a few months into the year when it ended, on a dazzlingly high note, and left me with a big hole in my heart. I’ve gradually been working on a way to get these characters together again, but it involves me doing something I’ve never done before: running a mini-campaign, being the DM. I hope in the new year I finally work up the courage to take that step.

I should point out that this wasn’t just any generic D&D campaign, but a fandom one based on the Donkey Kong/Rare and Mario universes. This is important because before this experience, I had started to become kind of disillusioned with the concept of fandom in general. Sharing mutual love of something had always been a big part of what my online presence and community-building had been based around, but over the past few years I had grown to feel worn out by the whole thing, whether it was because I myself felt used/manipulated, I felt like I didn’t fit in with certain communities, a meta cynicism with entitlement and toxicity in fandom in general, and other reasons. The D&D experience taught me something important though, which is that there’s still great value to be had in this type of community based around mutual love of something; it just often has to be on a smaller scale, something more intimate, which allows you to dig into the source material in a deep way while also creating something that has personal meaning for the parties involved. I also found immense value in making illustrations for the campaign even though it was for the enjoyment of quite a small audience; noticing how much more happiness that brought me compared to making things that did far more numbers on social media was revelatory for me. And so this was step one of coming to a new acceptance of how I could continue to use my art and my nerdom to make things that I found meaningful, not just for myself but for others.

Now just about concurrently with the last few sessions of our game, something huge occurred in my life: I got a full-time job! The past five years, after a really unhappy experience at my last workplace, a cross-country move, and a spate of unsuccessful interviews that broke my spirit, I had pretty much given up on having a “normal job” and was trying to make it full-time as an artist and content creator. This worked out fine for a while, although I never did better than “just scraping by” and never felt like I truly had any spending money or wiggle room. I live with my partner and this was hard on both of us as neither of us felt we had much money to spare for years, but I was trying to make a life in which I could be happy.

Well, after years, I learned that such a life didn’t even make me happy, let alone the monetary issues. I was burning out on doing commissions, and trying to make money on streaming left me feeling trapped as the things required for success on twitch (streaming a TON, hyper-focusing on one game or a “niche”) were not things I wanted to do. So in late 2021 and early 2022, feeling hopeless and tired and like a failure, I hit the job hunt again and it was very hard for me. Stressful interviews and constant rejection after years of having a weird resume gap which could only partially be explained by COVID.

But in March, I was super fortunate to be given a chance to more or less pick up my career as an administrative assistant right where I left off. It’s not without its stresses, but overall the people I work with are very kind and I have greatly enjoyed the life of a city girl, taking the bus downtown and working in a massive skyscraper. It’s much harder to get enthused about all those things in the winter, but nevertheless.

This has revolutionized my life, as I have already learned to be frugal after years of being forced to live as such, and I have learned to a large degree not to value or need material possessions - yet now at least, I have the freedom to make the occasional fun purchase for myself or friends, travel to visit my family without feeling bad about it, support local restaurants more often, and so on. Moreover, it’s allowed my partner and I to buy plenty of things that we needed for home improvement projects, and begin our hobby of going out to garage and estate sales for fun.

There’s a number of great things that happened over the summer, such as getting to see a friend of mine from out of town, participating in a super fun community gaming event, and doubtless other things I’m forgetting. Getting into the fall/winter though, the most important thing is that I started some therapy sessions and was also able to get a prescription medication for depression and anxiety. This is the first time I’ve tried such a thing in years, as the other time it just kinda stopped working for me after half a year or so, and I’m hoping this is more successful.

To be honest I haven’t noticed a huge difference since starting the meds. It coincides almost exactly with me re-joining tumblr, and maybe my lack of inhibition with being cringe and free since coming here, and my ability to see twitter as a dark place that was bad for my mental health and my ease with giving twitter up almost entirely, has something to do with a change in brain chemistry. Mostly though, I think it’s carrying me through the winter when I’d normally be miserable (along with the vitamins I’ve been taking starting at the same time). I don’t feel much different since I started, but normally I -should- feel awful by this point in the year, and I don’t- so I hope when spring comes around I’ll feel like a gleeful superhuman.

I suppose the most important thing is - it hasn’t gotten rid of all anxiety or dark thoughts, it hasn’t rewired my whole personality, but I’m a lot better at letting things go. If I feel something awkward happened while I was in public, I can stop thinking about it once I’m home instead of ruminating on it all night. When my brain says to me “you’ve utterly failed to reach your potential, and when you die no one will miss you,” instead of letting this consume me and feeling like useless shit for several days, INSTEAD!! another part of my brain says “well, I can think of like, at LEAST five people who will for sure miss me, and maybe that wasn’t enough for me in the past, but it is for me now. And furthermore failure is relative, and subjective, and I’m just not going to think about that whole part,” and so I don’t. And I move on. And I get back to work or I play the funny video games.

To wrap it up, I just want to say that coming back to tumblr has been an absolute joy. I was really unsure about rejoining because it felt like my time on this site belonged to a past era of my life, when I was a slightly different person, and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to ever pick up where I left off without feeling like I was still carrying around baggage. Turns out: it was actually fucking easy, haha. I’ve been so happy to be welcomed here by some old friends, and to make new friends already. Even if I’m slow answering asks sometimes, the fact that people out there ask me things or tag me in things and want to know my opinion or analysis is like, enough to make me cry. I’m in my happy place, and my happy place is currently talking about the silly bunnies mostly, but I look forward to hanging onto current joys and discovering new ones to share in the coming year. This goes back to the thing I was talking about early on in this screed, where my continual aim is to use the fandom experience to create something meaningful and personal shared between people. It’s something I’ll keep considering and working on.

If you reached the end, thank you so much! I hope if you are going through dark times that you know, things can get better and you can reach a point in your life you are happy with, even if it looks different from how you might have planned or expected. Thanks for being here with me and happy new year.

-Courtney

[thebuzztrack]

A Review of 'The Flash' (2023)

Toward the beginning, Barry tells a maternity nurse to speak with a mental health professional because the Justice League is not good at such a thing. This made me sad, given the context of the real-life issues with Ezra Miller in recent years and the toxic workplace environment described by Ray Fisher after the Justice League movie was released. On its own, the story of The Flash is a fun twist on an origin story by utilizing the Flashpoint Paradox concept as a premise. We are introduced to Bary’s origin story, the introduction to the DC multiverse, and the appearance of Reverse Flash. For the downsides, I believe the CGI babies in the opening sequence and CGI Speedforce for the rest of the movie are horrendously rendered. It’s like a rough draft animatic instead of a final rendering for a multi-million dollar movie project. I am giving it a mid rating for being a mixed bag of results. A review point is given for bringing back Michael Keaton as Batman. Another review point is given for containing all the cameo appearances, even though some are extremely bad CGI reconstructions. And a final review point is given for the story arc being emotionally engaging but avoiding the usual tropes that would be easy bait to include in this type of story. My last words would be to admit shamefully I like Emo Kara. When will she start an emo band and name it All Kryptonian Rejects?

The Flash (2023) is a superhero film that adapts the popular DC comic book storyline Flashpoint, in which Barry Allen, aka The Flash, uses his super speed to travel back in time and save his mother from being murdered. However, his actions have unforeseen consequences, as he creates a new timeline where General Zod has conquered Earth where no other superheroes exist. To restore his original reality, Barry must team up with an older Bruce Wayne, who has retired from being Batman, and a young Kara Zor-El, the last survivor of Krypton.

The film is directed by Andy Muschietti, best known for his horror films It (Part One and Two) and Mama. The screenplay is written by Christina Hodson, who also penned Birds of Prey (2020) and Bumblebee (2018). The film stars Ezra Miller as Barry Allen, Michael Keaton as Bruce Wayne, Sasha Calle as Kara Zor-El, Michael Shannon as General Zod, Ron Livingston as Henry Allen, Maribel Verdú as Nora Allen, Kiersey Clemons as Iris West, Antje Traue as Faora-Ul, and Jeremy Irons as Alfred Pennyworth.

The intention of this movie is expected to be a game-changer for the DCEU, as it formally introduces the concept of the multiverse into the DC movies universe, which allows for different versions of the same characters to coexist in multiple realities. The film also marks the return of Michael Keaton as Batman, who previously played the character in Tim Burton’s Batman (1989) and Batman Returns (1992). Keaton’s Batman is said to be a mentor figure for Barry and Kara.

The movie had been in studio production development with Warner Bros for over a decade, with various writers and directors attached and departed over the years. The original plan for a release date was supposed to be in 2018 but got delayed multiple times due to creative differences, production issues, the COVID-19 pandemic, post-production setbacks, and controversies surrounding Ezra Miller. The film finally began filming in April 2021 in London and wrapped up in October 2021. The film’s first trailer was released at DC FanDome in October 2021, generating positive buzz among fans and critics.

[ayin-me-yesh]

Rambling about family and toxic shame (just wanting to get thoughts out of my head)

It's been 5 years since I stopped talking to my parents. Stopped talking is really the right way of putting it as I didn't so much cut them off over some affront as I lost my capacity to even try and respond. I couldn't even read their emails anymore. I'd have to have my partner read them and summarize them for me. Eventually I couldn't manage trying to put words together in response to those summaries either.

When I was a teen, my parents would completely and intentionally isolate me from peers and more supportive adults and my mom would threaten to throw me out of the house if I "cross-dressed" or cut my hair "too short." My dad also responded to my depression and school refusals by coming into my room in the morning, asking me if I was going to be responsible today, throwing me out of bed or kicking the entire mattress on to the floor, and then dumping water over me.

When I moved out, things didn't improve. When I shortened a visit home over a week-long school break to spend time with friends too, my dad retaliated by throwing my bag down the stairs and breaking a present I'd bought for a girlfriend. During a stay with them in 2015 when I'd dropped out of university, my dad dropped me off at work and as I was getting out of the car told me it must be nice being such a failure that nothing I do even matters anymore. He later told me he and my mom are the only people who will ever love me.

When I started avoiding interacting with them as often, they became increasingly hostile and demanding. By the time I cut them off in 2018, my mom was writing me emails every day and both my parents would harass me if I didn't respond within 24 hours. Basic attempts at setting boundaries were responded to with scorn and dismissal.

On some level I feel like my inability to talk to them anymore just makes sense. What is there even to say? What's the point in subjecting myself to their bullshit anymore? But in spite of that I still feel constant guilt. I feel like I'm bad, irredeemable, unforgivable, ungrateful, shameful, etc. etc. etc. Whenever family comes up with strangers in classrooms or workplaces or casual conversation, I feel like a monster masquerading as a person. When I think about names and identities as a trans person, I feel unworthy of any connection to my family history, to my ancestry, to myself.

It's so frustrating because I've tried going to therapy about this and it just made things worse. I've been told I must not value family. If I try emphasizing I'm not actually ok with how things are on an emotional level, I'm then encouraged to talk to my parents again and sort things out. I'm told my parents mean well.

It's also frustrating because I've lost everyone else in my life I knew growing up because everyone else back home also sees me as a monster. My dad sent me a message through a childhood friend using a nickname a physically abusive ex gave me based on my deadname after I'd asked him to not use that at least, to even just use my deadname itself if nothing else, shaming me for not talking to him, guilt-tripping me about his health, and then telling me he loved me. My friend cut me off when I had a meltdown and didn't want to respond to him because they also viewed me as just being cruel and uncaring.

This shit just eats at me constantly. I think about it dozens of times every day. Even when I'm doing better, even on anti-depressants, it's just a never ending intrusive thought. My sense that I no longer belong anywhere. That I'm not worthy of anyone. That I'm a terrible person. That I never even deserved to be born.

I know that's all internalized crap. I know that's not how I treat or view other people even when they HAVE done awful things. But it won't stop haunting me anyway. I feel like I'm carrying a dybbuk created from my parents resentment. It's an unbearable weight. It clings and grasps no matter how hard I try to get rid of it.