#yeah i know i'm like the only person who thinks like this lmao

[finniestoncrane]

KTJL!Boomer x Fem!Reader, word count: 850 sooooo long ago i was discussing with some people how disgustingly hot boomer would find beer if it was involved in sex, so... yeah. i'm not a beer person, so i'm pretending this is a wee can of tennents lmao💙 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: beer drinking, beer play/food play, suggestive flirting, reader has tits (kind of ample ones i guess!)

"Wanna see my party trick?"

It was all George could do to act cool. Underneath his seemingly permanent smirk, crooked smile, slightly upturned nose, raised eyebrow, you could almost make out the faint blush on his freckled cheeks, a little bit of a tremble on his bottom lip as he wondered what that party trick might be.

"Well?"

"Alright then, Sheila. Show us what you've got."

As you excitedly jumped up from the sofa and headed to the kitchen, he let his mind wander. He was an optimist, after all. Of course, he knew you were only trying to break the awkward silence between you as you lazed on his sofa. It wasn't the best date he'd ever taken someone on. But it was difficult to think of something romantic to do when his idea of a good time was getting too drunk to move and then having someone else jump onto his lap and do all the work. Three beers in and you didn't look like you were going to start jumping any time soon. So he would take excitement where he could. If that meant pretending that your party trick was unhinging your jaw like a python and taking all of him in it, then he was content to live in that daydream.

It would have been impossible for him to know you were feeling as tense and desperate as he was. Mostly, because it seemed impossible for anyone to ever be as desperate as George Harkness. You'd expected a bit more when he'd invited you over to his place for drinks, and you were determined to get it. A bit of overtly seductive flirting was what the situation called for, and you knew exactly what kind of trick would get him drooling.

You returned from the small, messy kitchenette with a bottle of beer in hand.

"That's your trick? Fetching a beer? It's not bad, but you're not winning Crufts any time soon, girl."

As you walked to the sofa you rolled your eyes, stopping in front of him with a half-hearted smile.

"It's a bit more impressive than that, actually. I need you to stand up though."

"Aw, what? I have to do something? It's hardly your trick then, is it?"

"George. Stand up. I promise, it'll be worth it."

The way your lips curled into a knowing grin sent a tingle of electricity over him, quickly travelling down his length. He was standing up, a move so quick you barely registered it. Ready for anything. And once he was there in front of you, you sank to your knees.

George's mind began racing as he stared down at you, catching your eyes looking back up at him from your position on the floor at his feet. Maybe he was right. Maybe your party trick would be unveiling an up to now hidden ability to take all of his impressive girth and length in your mouth at one time. Down to the balls, something no one else had ever been able to do before out of the very limited few who were actually willing to try.

Your fingers took hold of his belt buckle, working at it to undo it. But as he braced himself for you to undo his fly and free his cock, you stopped, instead gripping the buckle with one hand and reaching for the bottle of beer with the other.

Much to his amusement, you placed the cool bottle between your breasts, grimacing and shivering at the sensation of the cold, wet glass on your skin. And then, leaning in to him, pulling the buckle down and undoing the beer. As you sank back down onto your heels, the beer frothed up and foamed over the lip, liquid spilling out over the spout and onto your breasts. Without even realising it, George licked his lips.

Trying to stop the overflow of foam, you leaned forward and closed your lips around the long neck of the bottle, letting your mouth sink a little. He'd never considered before how entirely arousing it would be to bring beer into the bedroom, but you were inspiring him. His mind was racing, his face flushing with heat as his cock twitched against his underwear.

You sucked the neck of the bottle a little longer, removing your mouth with a pop. A quick glance down showed you the mess you had made. Your chest glistening with slightly sticky liquid. Once you had placed the bottle on the table, you lifted your hands to cup at your breasts, lifting your gaze to George, finding him focused on your body.

"Look at the mess I've made. If only there was someone who enjoyed beer who could clean it up for me."

He wiggled with excitement, like an enthusiastic puppy. If he'd had ears, they would have perked up, his tail would have been wagging. His tongue... well, his tongue actually was out, panting in anticipation of getting to lap at your breasts.

With a quick flit of his eyes to yours, you caught the mischievous glint as he moved to you.

"That was a good trick, Sheila. Now let me show you mine."

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

[jabeur]

okay like the thing is that suicide jokes and such are probably not that bad or that big of a deal if you're not really suicidal but if you're For Real suicidal or have been before and are not doing well mentally and you keep making them and start finding comfort in the thought you could kill yourself if you wanted to. be careful

[piplupod]

feels like the isolation is a gushing wound and going to the centre is just a small bandage. i think perhaps i am not really ever going to feel okay unless something miraculous happens. i am retaining some semblance of sanity now that I'm leaving the house and socializing with non-family more than once a week, but i am still hurting more than I can really tolerate and I don't know what to do about it. there doesn't seem to be a fix for this that I can enact.

[nonuggetshere]

I'm gonna continue with the requests later, but I also felt the need to doodle my two PVs with a little bit of gender on the side

They're both still very much genderless, but because not every non-binary/agender person will have the same perception/feelings regarding their gender and won't have the same gender presentation, I decided to mess around with it a little

Hallow is genderfluidv(though after some consideration I realised agenderflux describes them more accurately, but oh well, these labels don't even exist in their story so who cares), they're non-binary but their alignment fluctuates between fem-leaning, masc-leaning, something in-between and neither. They're fine with any terms and pronouns but mostly go by they/them.

Luna is genderfae/transfem, their gender fluctuates between agender and fem-aligned non-binary. They mostly go by they/them and gender-neutral and feminine terms, they're fine with she/her and some neopronouns, but any masculine terms and pronouns are a big no-no for them. Currently, I'm considering making them an enby lesbian, but that might change in the future.

[perilegs]

being homesick and changing as a person so much the place you grew up in isn't your home anymore is such a core part of ati and upon further inspection i think i was projecting a little

[lesbiansanemi]

I am so fucking sick of living with my roommate and his fuck ass boyfriend. Also watching my roommate burn every single one of his (already rather minimal, I might add) bridges for this guy is also kind of painful but also his relationship with me is one of said bridges so I'm almost past the point of even feeling bad for him lmao

[oozeandgoo-art]

everyone is sooo in love with vakori on account of le is so cool and smart and deeply pragmatic and is also completely batshit insane

[maddy-ferguson]

i saw someone say they were hoping noah would apologize and it's just kinda fascinating to me...if he thought zionism was sexy on monday (or i guess on sunday probably and for many days and weeks before that) why would he suddenly think it's an awful ideology on friday?

[kushanna]

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

i'm kind of amazed how most of the stardew marriage candidates just want you to be their manic pixie dream whatever by agreeing with everything they like and plying them with compliments or praise or whatever (which is fine but a bit. Much) but for shane his romance is just you being there for him while he figures his own shit out... dunno why i never wanted to romance him before he's so good

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also if only the physical copy of how to disappear completely & never be found i first encountered & read a few years ago (sort of [roughly avg age ten] reader book, not any similarly titled How To) hadn't disappeared completely & not been found since, probably b/c i put it somewhere i intended to be For Safekeeping, which is also how my binder vanished....b/c it's one of those like. those book for late elementary/middle school readers when they just weave in this unrealism which makes for a delightful range & unpredicability? and with a cynical protagonist girl like off to the races like wow her mom is depressed asf & smoking? and it's about A Family History Secrets Mystery so blatantly a haunting that the inciting incident is basically introducing a haunted [family history secrets mystery] house. and spoilers don't matter like it's stemming from there being this missing uncle who grew up so in contrast to the Winsome Winning Sibling Who Does It All Right while seeing his own affiliation with rats that he tried to disappear completely & never be found which led to this Tragedy which led to this more unintended disappearance of his & he haunts this house & wants to be left alone & only goes out at night with this [ambiguous Is That A Giant Rat Or Weird Small Dog (protagonist affected by these family situations who expresses her preoccupation with an awareness of how fate can Strike and Get you with this interest with roving packs of killer chihuahuas. people think she's weird though she spontaneously befriends this other girl struck with this bolt from the blue & a bit weird / outcast & then Insightful who i wish was in it more)] & plays into the hauntedness danger like playing into the [something's Wrong with you then] until having to take yet more action where the urge to express the truth comes out more both b/c living that hidden is more threatened but also b/c now the niece children are more threatened as well. ft. a sort of preternatural blurring of time b/c of only being communicated with through this uncle via his comic pages (that he paints?) of dubiously accurate translations of irl events that are created so quickly it seems to verge on foresight, imagine like "hmm what's this painting. it's me standing in this room looking at this painting??? as someone ominous lurks in the shadows right behind me?" in both [now how could you know this & paint it really fast ahead of time] and [horror]

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Just had the idea of doing a Roxy askblog that's based on it being a secret blog she's not allowed to have and every so often if someone asks her something she just says stuff like "To the Fazspy reading this, I'm not the real Roxy." to try and throw the staff off her trail lmao

Will probably never make a blog like that, but it could be kinda funny. Maybe I bring the idea of an 'ask Roxy anything' game back where I draw the answers for it instead so it's not a whole ass blog dedicated to Roxy being a sneaky lil shit on the internet

[tortoise-teapot]

this tiny mortified storyboard solas is my favorite one i've ever drawn

[rotisseries]

NARINES 4EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what if there were two guys that not only hated each other viscerally on a personal level but also everything they individually stood for and they tried to kill each other and there's no universe where they both make it and they have a hundred differences and a thousand similarities and they both die for drako and this started as a joke but why does narines lowkey go hard

narines will be an absolutely banger #Problematique rarepair when you're famous

[zorkaya-moved]

I'll be honest that I'll be extra selective with following HSR blogs due to how mischaracterized characters from HI3 can get or how connections to HI3 gets w/o proper dive into lore on many occasions. You do you but I will just step back on that for personal comfort.

I'm super happy for y'all creativity but I will be separating all but Welt Yang (and Himeko sometimes in RPs) from HI3 altogether for personal preference. Yes, it is because of my own HI3 verse that's also included. Glad people get interested in HI3 because of Welt and Void Archives, it's just... yeah. Only personal preferences acting here. Have fun! Just know it's not you, it's literally just me about following back ;)