#yeji is too fine

[ddeongies]

balcony chapter 4 is 6k so far and over 2k of it is [REDACTED]

[shownuubear]

I think I know what photocard is going on the back of my phone

[jenscx]

LOVE ME BACK — yu jimin

after a nasty breakup with your boyfriend of two years, you find solace in a bar and a mystery woman’s arms. you were convinced it was just a one time thing. yet, you didn’t expect to see her again at your workplace.

TAGS — fluff, lowk crack, suggestive themes, mentions of sex and alcohol, ceo!rina, office au, reader has a boyfriend (at first), hwang hyunjin as plot device, mentions of cheating, probably a hr violation, jealousy, hidden relationship, cursing

WORDCOUNT — 10.3k

when you were younger, your dream was to be an astronaut. now in your early twenties, you’ve succumbed to the average 9-5 job that every adult hates. your job was a pain in the neck, figuratively and literally. staring at a computer all day was tough work, but if you said that out loud, you would seem like a lunatic.

your hands dance bleakly across the keyboard, fingers tapping insistently to finish the report. maybe you would even get home on time today. a vibration from your phone distracts your focus, a message from your boyfriend.

staring at the notification, you sigh and pick up your phone to text back. it’s a chain of messages, ranging from urgent calls to angry scoldings. your eyes narrow as a call comes in, displaying, hyun ♡.

“hyunjin oppa,” you whisper, “i’m at work.”

“you’re still at work? i thought i told you that my sister’s visiting today? my mum’s cooking for you.”

groaning internally, you reply softly, “i’m really sorry but this report will probably take half an hour more. tell unnie and auntie i’ll be late.”

hyunjin’s voice rings through the phone, irritated, “i told you about it. did you forget or are you just not willing to spend time with my family?”

“i didn’t forget, seriously, and you know i love your family and your mum’s cooking.”

that’s kind of a lie. you weren’t really welcomed with his family. his mother had objected to your relationship from the get go. his father was cold and indifferent. his sister was the only one who actually talked to you. but his mother’s cooking was good.

“you’re prioritising your work over spending time with me,” hyunjin states.

“i made this clear from the start,” you pinch your nose bridge, “my job always comes first.”

his annoyed tone shines through, bright as day, “i don’t get why you’re still working at that firm. i can provide for the both of us.”

you sigh, frustrated at hyunjin’s insolence.

“i enjoy this job,” a lie, “i don’t want to just stay in my apartment all day with nothing to do and i worked hard to get here.” true.

“that’s why you should just move in with me.” with that mother of his? no way in hell.

“i like my apartment,” you say firmly, glancing at the unfinished report open, “oppa, if you’re just going to scold me, at least do it later. i’m working now.”

“you’re always working. how can you work so much? y/n, are you preoccupied with something else? or someone?”

anger bubbles lowly in your veins.

“what on earth are you saying?”

“i’m saying that you may be busy with someone. whatever, if you’re always working, let’s just end things here. i can’t always be waiting for you at home.”

“you don’t make time for me either. on my off-days, you always hang out with your friends. how many dates have you cancelled?”

“i’m sorry i have a social life. my life doesn’t revolve around spending time with you. if you have a problem with it, let’s break up.”

you roll your eyes. you would be amused at how a 24 year old would think so irrationally, if that 24 year old wasn’t breaking up with you right now. your hand forms a fist on the table. maybe hyunjin was fine with lazing around at home, letting his mother serve him like a maid. but you weren’t. hyunjin didn’t have any ambitions, dropping out of college after his first year, claiming it was too difficult. you had only cooed at him gently, his first and only year at college was when you met him and started dating.

“fine. let’s break up as you wish. ask yeji unnie to pack my things at your house, i’ll pick it up—”

the call ends abruptly, you’re baffled at his childish antics. groaning, you throw your head into your hands. was your two year relationship really ending here? over a phone call? tossing your phone to the side, you perk up, determined to take your mind off your boyfriend. you still had a job to do after all.

yet, the thought of losing the two years you’ve spent with hyunjin makes you frown. he wasn’t a bad boyfriend. he was a nice guy, most of the time. he was a man after all, he had his stupid moments. spending two years with him meant that some part of you actually liked him. maybe not to the extent of love. you’ve never thought about it.

is that why he broke up with you? because you weren’t in it for love? was hwang hyunjin just another guy for you to past time with? if you couldn’t find love with a guy like hyunjin, who’s good looking and well-mannered, who could you find love with? were you some emotionless robot who didn’t care for others’ feelings?

forcefully removing these persisting questions from your head, you focus on the report. missing fabric, wrong dimensions, plagiarised designs, what was wrong with this fashion company?

“sunbae, still not clocking out?” kim minjeong, the new intern and coincidentally, your junior from high school, peeks above your computer. you shake your head, smiling sheepishly at her, “don’t call me sunbae, I’m ms seo right now.”

minjeong pouts, “sorry, i’m just not used to it. and you’re only like, a year older. want me to wait for you?”

you eye the report with distain, grimacing, “it’s okay, minjeong. you can go first, i think this will take a long time.”

the younger girl nods and quickly leaves. you’ve never wished you were someone else so badly before. your eyes follow minjeong from her cubicle to the lift. you slap your cheeks, willing yourself to focus.

after a few excruciating long hours, you clap your hands merrily, eyes gleaming with excitement and happiness. the stupid report was finally finished! you hum happily as you pack up your things. once you had picked up your bag, a notification graces your phone.

swiping up, it’s a text from yeji, warning you that hyunjin had left the house urgently. concerned, but not panicking, you reply saying that maybe he went out for fresh air. yeji’s next few messages are about how their mother is blaming you for hyunjin’s bad mood.

whatever. you can’t find it in yourself to care.

still overjoyed by the fact you had finished the mundane report, you head down to the lobby, grinning. a few employees who were still there eyed you weirdly but you brushed them off. today was a good day, despite stupid hyunjin.

as the doors open, you bring out your phone. no new messages from hyunjin or yeji. maybe it was partially your fault for making promises you couldn’t keep. ugh. the late night graces your presence, streets filled with busy cars. you check the time, 8pm. you should take your mind off hyunjin. and what better way to do so than to go get drunk?

you quickly text yizhuo, who’s probably also drinking right now.

seo y/n [8.26pm]:

are u at jiwoong’s bar?

i just ended

ning yizhuo [8.27pm]:

how’d you know?

i’m drinking with chenle

come unnie

chenle? you furrow your brows. wasn’t he that super rich kid who yizhuo plays video games with? ah, whatever, you seriously need to get drunk now.

swiftly hauling down a cab (honestly, props to you. calling a taxi at night was basically war), you make your way to the bar.

it’s a relatively new establishment, furnished with matte dark oak floorings and a sleek marble bar. it was the closest bar to your workplace, making it a common meeting area for you and your co-workers. normally, during the last day of each month, team manager kim would bring you to go drinking. you push at the doors, the sight of two figures yelling at each other greet you. usually, you would have ignored it. it’s a bar, it’s common to have drunk people fighting. yet, when you squinted closely, realisation struck you.

“hyunjin?” you gasp, “what are you doing here?”

your ex-boyfriend swerves around, eyes blazing with fury as yizhuo curses at him.

“where were you?” he demands, “i texted you multiple times.”

you turn on your phone, grimacing at the countless messages.

“it was on silent mode. if you want to talk, let’s go outside, don’t disturb the people here.”

yizhuo attempts to follow but you just hold a hand out. if hyunjin hurt yizhuo, you would never forgive yourself. besides, this was something you had to do alone.

begrudgingly, hyunjin agrees and exits the bar. out in the street, you take note of his dishevelled self.

“why’d you decide to come here? i know you’re here to find another guy. who is it? i’ll fucking kill him,” hyunjin seethes. you notice the slight flush in his face. was he drunk?

unable to remain passive, you say firmly, “hyunjin, you said you wanted to break up. now that i’ve seen you, let’s break up.”

“are you fucking serious?” he asks incredulously, “i came all the way here to find you and you are the one breaking up with me?”

you retort, “you are the one who said you want to end things. if i found another guy, so what? we’re not dating anymore.”

your last few words hit a nerve. hyunjin’s hands fly out to grab your arms, furiously digging his fingernails into your wrists.

“i’ll fucking kill you if you leave me for another man, don’t test me seo y/n,” he growls. disgusted, you try to escape from his hold. being taller and a guy, he’s obviously stronger. you feel your skin breaking at the edge.

“let go!” you grit your teeth, trying to pry his fingers off. he relentlessly grips on, even managing to avoid any attempts of your escape.

slow, steady footsteps approach. you notice the look of anxiety on hyunjin’s face. what would this look like to an outsider? his grip doesn’t lessen however. the figure opens the doors, raising an eyebrow.

“what the hell are you looking at?” hyunjin snarls. your eyes fly to the stranger. it’s a woman, thank god.

despite your current predicament, you can’t help but admire the woman staring at you. her face was sculpted by the gods; dark, deep, hypnotising eyes, a tall nose bridge, red, full lips that formed a thin line.

“why are you assaulting a woman?” god, you could just die hearing her voice. husky and intimidating, hyunjin was practically quivering in his feet.

“i-i’m not doing anything! you’re the one staring at us, bitch.”

her eyes narrow and she scoffs, “did your mother teach you any manners? i was just concerned for her safety,” she gestures to you, “it seems as if you’re holding her here, unwilling to let go.”

“i’m not doing jackshit.”

your eyes bore into her, calling out for help.

“ah,” the stranger inches closer, fingers trailing from your shoulder to your arm. you shudder at her touch. she smirks, “why don’t you let her go now? or should i call the police on you, hwang hyunjin?”

hyunjin’s face turns red. nervousness grows at the sight of his anger.

“how the fuck do you know my name?”

she tilts her head, reminiscent of a curious puppy, “oh, don’t you know who i am? tell your father if his son acts up again, we might not continue our deal.”

“how do you know my dad?” hyunjin yells, “and what deal do you have with him?”

“i’m your father’s biggest business partner. how would he feel if he found out he lost his company because of his idiot son? or would you want me to reveal some of your own secrets? what’s her name, jiyeon?”

your eyes widen at the mention of hyunjin’s ex. he had broken up with lee jiyeon months before meeting you. why was this stranger bringing her up again? and how did she know so much?

hyunjin glances at you, “don’t you fucking dare.”

by now, hyunjin had let go of your hand entirely. the stranger just sighs dramatically and stares at her fingernails.

“hyunjin-ssi, you really have a knack for being a public nuisance. i just wanted a drink, and my precious evening was interrupted by you screaming. ah, should you really be concerned about your ex-girlfriend finding a new guy? haven’t you already done so while still in the relationship?”

in a second, hyunjin lunges for the stranger. his hands fly out to grab at her hair, but she manages to dodge the sudden attack. frowning at hyunjin, the stranger finally scoffs, “you’re pathetic. don’t you dare touch my clothes, they’re designer. leave now before i call the cops on you.” despite his anger, hyunjin actually looks spooked and quickly stomps away. thank god. she swats off the imaginary dust on her shoulders and turns to you.

in contrast to before, she sends a small smile, “you did a good job breaking up with this idiot.”

“thank you for saving me.”

she shrugs, “it’s all right. he was being a nuisance.”

“i’m sorry…” you ask, “but how did you know so much about hyunjin?”

“i deal with the hwang group. i have met his father on several occasions. sometimes, he has to clean up his son’s mess. most of the time, he can’t do it alone. hence, he finds us,” her smile turns into a grimace, “i apologise that someone like him has been taking advantage of you. i assure you that hwang hyunjin and park jiyeon will be taken care of.”

“no, it’s okay, i kind of had a feeling already,” you hesitate to reach out to her, “uhm, can i know your name?”

the stranger adjusts her clothes; a black pantsuit. your eyes trail down from her face to her luminous black hair. they follow the shape of her jawline, sharp as a knife, down to her collarbones. you unconsciously swallow your saliva.

“you can call me jimin,” she says, taking a piece of card out from her pocket, handing it to you. your eyes skim the details. yu jimin. nothing else is on the card except for a phone number. “what can i call you?”

“y/n, seo y/n.”

“if you find yourself in another situation as such, i will do my best to help, y/n.”

you can’t believe a woman like her is pledging her assistance to you.

unable to control yourself, you blurt out, “what can i do to repay you?”

jimin’s eyes form into slits, crinkling into a devilish smile.

“what are you insinuating?”

everything around you is soft, pillowy and warm. except for one. the incessant buzzing of something. it snaps you out of your reverie. groaning loudly, you throw your hand to reach out for the device causing the vibration. your fingers hit an unfamiliar surface. since when did you have a bedside table this close? eyelids fluttering open, you regain consciousness.

“what the hell?” you say out loud, sitting upright in bed. your phone lays beside you, its buzzing unable to distract you from what you’re seeing. white silk sheets covered your bare body, which was littered with bite marks and hickeys. it trailed on from your neck to the dip in your hips. lingering bruises were left on your thighs too.

oh fuck.

you were screwed.

grasping your phone, you scan the room for your clothes. finally catching sight of your scattered clothes, you gently pick them up, face turning red at the sight of your well-marked body. your purse and belongings are littered all over the floor as well. a disgruntled groan emits from the bunched up blankets. it’s only now you realise there’s a person below it, snoring peacefully.

wincing at the slight soreness in your lower body, you gently throw the duvet cover off you and slowly put on your clothes, afraid of disturbing the sleeping woman. taking one last look at the bed, a mop of black hair contrasting the pale serene face below.

running your hands through your hair to comb the mess, you rush out of the bedroom. the sight before you leaves you in awe. whoever this jimin person was, her apartment was amazingly furnished. whatever, you shake your head before you could be further distracted.

there’s countless messages left by yizhuo, all inquiring about your whereabouts. shit. you forgot to tell her. after assuring her that you were alive and not kidnapped, you quickly navigate your way back home. surprisingly, jimin’s modern apartment wasn’t far away from yours, despite the contrast between the two homes. you could infer accurately that karina was some wealthy bachelorette who held power. between her penthouse and the conversation with hyunjin, she was probably a high rank in the business industry.

after reaching your house, you take a much needed shower and slip into a white button up blouse and a black pencil skirt. this was your usual office attire. thankfully, as you had finished the looming report the previous night, you didn’t have to get to the office early. finishing up with some light makeup, you head out satisfied. the soreness in your lower body serves as a constant reminder of the activities you took part in. at least you didn’t have a hangover.

entering the lounge, you spot your colleagues all conversing with one another. minjeong seems to be in a heated debate. your eyes dart to the figure standing by the counter.

“good morning, ms seo,” you bow when team manager kim greets you. kim gaeul, two years your senior, and somewhat of a friend.

“good morning,” you reply. gaeul is sipping on the coffee from the cafe opposite. she gestures towards the paper bag on the counter, “there’s a latte in there for you. good job on the report, i read it this morning.”

you beam at the manager, “thank you so much.” desperately, you chug the latte, relieved that you had caffeine in your body to survive the day ahead. gaeul stares at you in amusement before clearing her throat, “now that everyone is here, i would like to announce that a new ceo will be coming.”

there’s some mutters and murmurs of confusion.

“our current ceo will be resigning,” gaeul says, a fixed smile on her face, “hence the need for a new ceo. she will be here shortly. at ten, please gather in the meeting room so she can introduce herself to all of us.”

you check the time, it was forty past nine. the new ceo will be coming soon. was there enough time to get any work done before she arrived? probably not. you sit down next to minjeong on the couch. she catches you mid yawn.

“sunbae, did you get enough sleep?” your ears blush at the memory of what happened.

“maybe i didn’t sleep well,” you say. minjeong nods, a look of pity on her face, “you must have gotten home late because of that report.”

you scratch your neck, “yeah, i got home pretty late.”

“maybe you can take a quick nap? you still have twenty minutes, i’ll wake you up.”

shaking your head, you chuckle, “it’s okay, minjeong. i’ll get through the day. at least team manager kim got us all coffee.”

despite your words, you find your eyelids fluttering close every second. maybe you should really take a nap. the events of the previous night had left you incredibly tired. breaking up with hyunjin was emotionally draining, whereas jimin… you rid the thoughts from your brain. it would serve you no good to be thinking about her right now. she was just a helpful woman who you repaid by sleeping with. at least it was enjoyable. you certainly enjoyed the feel of her warm body against yours. even before you start to reminisce, minjeong jolts upwards and exclaims, “time to go meet the ceo!”

the rest of the group follows suit, heading towards the lift. you wearily drag yourself to follow along, an arm looped through minjeong for support.

“y’all think she’ll be pretty?” a voice rings out from the crowd.

“aren’t most ceos like forty years old?”

“women don’t expire past the age of forty, mark,” you retort. mark only smirks, “maybe she’ll be a hot cougar.”

you roll your eyes at his words, yet you can’t help but imagine what the new ceo would be like. would she be intimidating? confrontational? you just hope she won’t be unreasonable. god knows you need a break from this absurd company. the only good thing about it was its pay and the people you work with.

“quiet down everyone,” gaeul says, “she’s coming soon, please be on your best behaviour.” she shoots a look at the rowdy group of guys nearer to the back. you try to inch closer to the front, the denial of your curiosity itching at you. despite your tired state, there was still some interest in the next ceo. “there she is!” minjeong whispers loudly.

your head flies to look up, mouth agape as your eyes bore into the woman’s frame. under the exquisite fabric draped over her, you could still sense her elegance. the way her steps echoed against the tiles, commanding everyone’s attention. your heart drops at the familiarity.

oh.

oh no.

below her bright red, glossy lips, resides a beauty mark.

you remember your own lips moulding against hers from the night before. the feel of her burning skin on top of your equally desperate body. her lingering touches, fingers tracing down from your collarbone.

“she’s pretty,” minjeong blurts out. you nod.

she was a goddess, aphrodite incarnated. you distinctively recall how sweet her words were, how her voice toned down to a husky drawl, whispering the things she would do to you. a shiver runs down your body, you clench your fists. how were you getting riled up over a memory?

your eyes follow her as she turns to face everyone. her face remains impassive as she addresses the crowd, “i am your ceo, karina.” cold, narrow eyes flick through the gathering, eventually meeting yours. if anyone else had looked closer, they would have noticed the shock in the way her eyes widen ever so slightly. yet, she swiftly regains herself.

“please do carry on as usual,” she says, you can’t believe she’s the same person as the jimin from last night, “i will be conducting a meeting later. do not be late.”

as her footsteps recede, you let out an exhale of breath. having her eyes on you made it hard to breathe, she literally took your breath away. minjeong eyes you curiously, but the crowd quickly disperses, sensing that karina was not to be messed with. they would rather get back to their jobs than deal with an angry ceo.

after heading back up, you finally sit down on your office chair, finding it more comfortable than usual. normally, it felt like it was forcing your spine in the most unnatural way. yet, after that interaction with jimin, you found solace in it.

“guys! ceo wants everyone in the meeting room now!” gaeul’s head pops out from the room, hurriedly gesturing for everyone to come. you reluctantly rise and walk to the room slowly. jimin’s already standing inside, a stony look on her face as she analyses a file of papers, presumably reports.

once everyone had entered and were settled down, jimin places the file back on the table, eyes roaming around as she says, “this company will collapse within a year’s time if i did not take the offer to buy it. hence, starting from now, there will be extreme changes.”

you take a gulp.

“first of all, we have to start investing more of our time into doing trade and business with others. isolating ourselves and believing that we can become successful without the help of others is idiotic,” jimin explains, “we should take the initiative and with someone like me at the helm, this company will flourish.” she hands out an assortment of papers around the room.

“this will tell you everything you need to know about your duties as an employee of this company. do take the time to read through thoroughly. i assure you with such a strategy, no one will need to work more than they have to.”

you can see some impressive looks from your colleagues. jimin was definitely a strong ceo, you already knew from how well-connected she was. yet, this would be your first time seeing her work ethic in action.

“everyone is dismissed. however,” jimin turns back around, eyes gleaming with mirth, “seo y/n, i want to meet you in my office.”

every inch of you freezes up. you sense some curiosity lingering around your colleagues, especially minjeong who offers a comforting pat on your shoulder. jimin’s lips form a devilish smile, akin to the one you saw previously. you sigh, already regretting all life choices thus far.

the door closes shut behind you. jimin sits down in her luxurious and pristine office chair. you kind of envy her.

a moment of silence passes before jimin speaks, “i did not expect to see you here.”

“neither did i,” you answer back. her appearance was a shock.

she chuckles slowly, “after leaving me in bed alone, with no note or anything, should i fire you?”

your eyes widen. what the hell? wasn’t this an abuse of authority? she couldn’t fire you that easily, right? over something that wasn’t even related to your job!

“you seem to not be able to finish your job, seo y/n,” jimin spins a fountain pen between her fingers. your gaze darts from the swirling pen to her face. indifferent, yet a hint of amusement.

“i assure you i am a hard worker and the night before is not related to my work ethic,” you reply.

jimin laughs, “do you not know how upset i was when i did not feel a body next to me? my sheets tidied up neatly, clothes gone and not a single hint of you left behind.”

“last night was a one-time thing,” you state firmly, “it will not happen again as i intend it to.”

the ceo’s eyes rake down your body, seemingly turning into satisfaction as she smiles, “you do not intend for it to happen again?”

“i… thank you for saving and helping me with my ex-boyfriend, but you’re my boss now and it’s probably a workplace violation.”

“so it is not because you do not want to, more so you feel that you are not allowed to,” jimin bluntly says. she’s right. you would like to indulge in the pleasure she provides once more, and continuously, but she’s your boss.

your silence speaks of your answer.

“it is unexpected that we have met under these circumstances. i won’t lie and say that i’m fine with forgetting about the night we spent together. huh. i wanted a date… yet, if you insist…”

jimin stands up from her desk, staring at the city skyline. you stare at her hooded eyes in the reflection of the window panel.

“you may leave,” she smiles, “but do call me karina and not jimin in front of others. they do not know my real name.”

you nod, unsure how to reply. were you meant to feel special that she had so willingly spared her real name to you? with others not privy of her name, you were the only one. jimin closes the door firmly behind you. you’re greeted by the sight of an anxious minjeong and a smirking mark lee.

“what did she say to you? and how did she know your name already?” minjeong asks hastily.

“just talking ‘bout work,” you answer smoothly, “we have a mutual friend.”

mark, bless him, adds on, “she’s prettier up close, right?”

“yeah,” you reply, cheeks reddening. you were well acquainted with her beauty by now, finding yourself momentarily starstruck.

“must be nice having the ceo know you,” minjeong says, sighing. you smile, but it comes out more like a grimace. was it really a blessing?

no, of course it wasn’t. you slept with your boss. unintentionally, in fact. you head back to your desk, hands almost ripping out your hair as you gaze at the closed door.

what have you gotten yourself into now?

you’re annoyed. irritated. angered. all because of your ceo. jimin doesn’t do anything outlandish, no. but she throws a mountain of work onto you. and only you. her previous promise of no one having to work more than they need to is out the window. you can only scoff, ashamed that you truly believed she would let you leave by five. however, it seems that jimin is rather petty. every time you snap back with a remark, she just smiles and places one more report on your desk a few minutes later. it’s maddening. was she not abusing her power?

the stack of papers on your desk feels never ending. compared to your colleagues, it’s clearly taller. even minjeong had commented about it. if the sudden increase of workload wasn’t enough, jimin also demanded you to do the most trivial things, such as fetching her coffee, shredding papers… did she not have enough money to afford a personal assistant? you were just an employee to the company. after bringing up your concerns to gaeul, the team manager merely shrugged, saying she could not do anything against the ceo. and it wasn’t as if jimin was outright abusing you. she was so clearly just messing with you!

(“you’re joking,” you gape at the pile of paperwork jimin was carrying to your table.

“how is this a joke to you?” jimin asks, a stern look on her face, but the small grin she wore betrayed her facade.)

this wasn’t any different from your life before the new ceo came. honestly, it might be worse. you had more work than ever, overtime was becoming a necessity in your life, and jimin just gets to prance around. you seriously had to take the initiative to discuss this, because what on earth.

finally deciding you had enough of jimin’s antics, you stand up from your desk, leaving the heaps of papers undone. determined, you take long strides, arriving at the door of jimin’s office. some of your colleagues eye you weirdly but they don’t make a sound. you just ignore them. not even knocking, you open the door. if jimin notices your presence, she doesn’t show it. her face is buried in a file, eyes darting from the report to the computer screen. you swallow, drawing courage from every fibre of your being.

“i need to talk to you.”

jimin’s head shoots up, an eyebrow raised. her bangs are parted today, no longer hovering over her eyes. the first few buttons of her black blouse are unbuttoned, revealing her carved collarbones. a pair of thick, black framed glasses rest on her sharp nose.

“about?”

“you’re messing with me,” you state.

the ceo stares. she looks rather dishevelled today, you wonder why.

“interesting. how did you come to that conclusion?” she asks, placing the file back onto her desk, her eyes fully focused on you now. trying to not get hypnotised by her forceful peering, you voice out, “you’ve been giving me more work than others. you always find some excuse to make me do stuff. i’ve worked here for three years and you’re making me an errand girl.”

it’s true. it feels like she’s just giving you filler work to do. there hasn’t been any improvement at all.

“i… i thought you would be different,” you admit, “different from our previous ceo. but it feels like nothing has changed. i’m still working overtime with no end in sight and it feels even worse than before.”

jimin doesn’t say a word. it’s the first time you’re saying this to anyone, your true feelings. jimin had made such big promises at the first meeting but after two months, there really wasn’t any change.

“i give you more work because you’re more capable,” jimin explains, a grim look on her face.

“that doesn’t excuse the fact you literally demand me to run around and make you coffee.”

“i can’t deny, that was for my personal amusement.”

your anger flares up, “see! you’re messing with me!”

“your reaction is funny,” she reasons weakly, “it’s really… i didn’t know it was taking a toll on you. i just wanted to see you get annoyed. you look cute when you’re grumpy.”

the previous frustration simmers down completely at her words. cute? was it appropriate for your boss to be saying this?

“what?”

jimin looks away shyly, a stark contrast to her intimidating facade, “i’ll try to restrain myself from now on… but i would like to talk to you about something as well.”

your curiosity is piqued. jimin’s face turns dark, her eyes narrowing as she asks, “are you and mark in a relationship?”

a gasp escapes your lips, because what the fuck?

“no, ew,” you instantly say, “mark acts like a kid.”

“so you have no romantic feelings for him?” jimin repeats.

“no, none at all.” somehow, you know why she’s even asking in the first place.

jimin frowns, “so why were you touching his face that day?”

you remember it vividly. mark was showing you the netflix movie, ‘365 days’ and stating that you could recreate it with jimin. he was joking with you, but you still got flustered. minjeong had been laughing so loudly it attracted the ceo to come into the break room. she has witnessed your hands grabbing mark’s collar, in the midst of threatening him.

“he was just saying something weird,” you mumble, not exactly willing to tell jimin she was the cause. the ceo nods. you can’t help but like this jimin slightly more than the brooding one. she seems more vulnerable today. more gentle and soft.

“okay,” jimin smiles, wider than usual, “you can leave now.”

you bow, slightly happier that the ceo was understanding of your concerns. maybe now you would get home on time, not that you had anyone waiting for you though. after your break up with hyunjin, you had increasingly found more alone time. sometimes you would spend the night with yizhuo, cooking dinner together. most times you would reach home and immediately fall asleep.

content with the meeting, you leave her office, bouncing back to your desk. the stack of papers feel considerably lighter knowing her true reasoning behind piling so much workload on you. perhaps she had more faith and trust in you. that made you feel proud.

a head peeks out above the partition.

“what did the boss talk to you about?” minjeong asks. you wave a hand at her, brushing her words off, “nothing really. karina was just telling me stuff about my job, giving comments, y’know.”

minjeong nods and ducks her head, returning to her work. you do the same, the weight previously resting on your shoulders significantly lighter. the day doesn’t seem so gloomy anymore.

you carry on typing with a small smile. unbeknownst to you, a pair of eyes gaze through the blinds.

jimin stays true to her word. despite the heavier workload, your heart feels lighter that she acknowledged your ability. it doesn’t bother you anymore that minjeong and the rest of your colleagues can leave instantly while you stay for a bit longer to refine some finer details. deeply engrossed, you don’t notice the sudden pattering of raindrops splashing against the windows. and you definitely don’t notice the light in jimin’s office still on.

stretching your arms, you yawn, intending to go home. yet, the moment you start packing your bag, realisation strikes you that it was raining. raining heavily. as you try to decide your next move, the door to jimin’s office opens.

her head peeks out, a frown on her face as she calls out, “why are you still here?”

“i was doing something and i just lost track of time,” you explain. jimin’s head tilts. you internally coo at the similarity of her to a puppy.

she takes one look outside and asks, “how are you going to get home? don’t you take the bus?”

you scrunch your nose, trying to think of a way to return home without being caught in the rain but with no avail.

“no idea,” you shrug, “i might call my friend to pick me up or something. not sure if she’s busy though.”

jimin takes long strides towards you, “i can drive you home.”

your eyes widen considerably, “no, it’s really okay!” you don’t know what you would do enclosed in a small space with her without other people around. she looks extra delectable today as well. usually, her hair is neat and proper, but today it’s slightly messy and her bangs are swept to the side, exposing her forehead. she still wears the pair of attractive black glasses and she’s adorning a navy pantsuit today.

“as your boss,” jimin smiles, “i need to ensure that all my employees are cared for. i can’t have you coming to work sick, can i?” you can’t really fight her logic there. it makes sense, she wouldn’t want you to get sick because she would lose manpower. yet, the explanation digs a hole in your heart.

she’s your boss.

you glance at the rain splattering.

“okay. take me home.”

jimin’s smile widens. you walk together in silence to the elevator. only the soft humming of her voice fills in the gaps. the silence stretches on till you reach her car as well. it’s only when you try to enter the backseat, jimin says, “what are you doing? come sit here.” she pats the passenger seat. you follow her instructions like a dog with its owner.

as the ceo starts up the car, you notice small details of it. it’s clearly expensive, no doubt. the sleek leather you were sitting on just speaks for itself. jimin had an air freshener hanging from the mirror, the strangest thing was that it was a dinosaur smelling of vanilla. she had a small shiro, the dog from shin-chan, figurine posed on the dashboard. you quietly giggle at the cuteness of it all. jimin having adorable items accessorising her car was such a stark contrast to her distant and cold persona as your boss.

“that’s cute,” you point out. jimin glances at what you’re pointing at and her cheeks redden, “ah. do you like shin-chan too?”

“uh,” you blank out, “i guess so? i like boo.”

jimin beams.

“that’s amazing,” she says with all the sincerity in the world, “let’s watch shin-chan together someday.”

it’s a strange proposal, no doubt. but you find yourself nodding too soon. the grin you receive from jimin is well worth it though.

“you can key in your address here,” she hands you her phone. as you type, jimin continues talking, “i broke off my deal with hwang by the way. has he contacted you at all?”

you shake your head, “no, but his sister has been texting me. apparently he’s very disoriented and is always drunk. he got into a scandal recently for starting a fight at another bar.”

jimin sighs, one of bemusement, “i truly wonder where such men get their audacity from.” you giggle at her words.

“honestly, hyunjin is childish and immature but he’s a good guy,” you confess, “i don’t know why he suddenly turned into someone like that.”

the ceo falls silent. you wonder if you said something wrong. maybe you offended her in some way. gulping, you distract yourself by watching the scenery of urbanised skyscrapers.

“you’re giving him too much credit,” jimin says, “he’s always been like that. he’s just a good actor.”

“really?”

jimin nods firmly, “of course. and did you really like him? or did you just like having him around?”

you debate on answering. wasn’t this too personal for someone’s boss to ask? your eyes swerve to watch jimin’s grip tighten on the steering wheel, her small hands showing white knuckles.

“there’s many things that are mistaken for another, such as liking someone and liking the idea of them.”

“what other things are you talking about?” you ask, genuinely curious.

the traffic light turns red. jimin presses on the brakes, a smirk plastered on her face as she turns to you.

“like finding someone good-looking and attractive. i know i’m good-looking, but am i attractive to you, y/n?” she leans forward, her face inches away from yours. your eyes unintentionally trail down to her lips before snapping shut and turning away.

“don’t leave me hanging,” you can hear the damn pout in her voice. a warm hand leaves a fleeting touch on your arm as she pulls you to look back at her again.

you resist the urge to throw yourself out of the car.

“the light’s green,” your voice comes out almost as if you were constipated.

jimin lets out a hearty laugh.

“we can settle this debate back at yours, don’t you think?” your hands clench by your side, neck strained to crane your head away from looking at the delectable woman.

“i don’t think that’s appropriate,” is what you end up saying. jimin shrugs. your eyes are drawn to the smooth expanse of her hands that rest against the steering wheel, and the way her knuckles unintentionally flex when turning.

“we’re far past appropriation,” she states, amused.

shrugging, you stare at the outside scenery instead, ensuring that you wouldn’t be salivating at the sight of your boss.

jimin hums to the music playing in her car. you roughly recognise it as a song from the pokemon anime ost. somehow, it’s totally believable that this domineering boss could also have a silly and endearing side to her. it was yu jimin after all.

“what are you thinking so hard about?”

you.

“work.”

“what about it? is the workload too heavy for you?” the concern in her voice makes you want to puke.

you shake your head.

“i’m just thinking… about that day,” you decide to answer truthfully.

jimin tilts her head, “what day?”

“you know…” it comes out in a hushed and embarrassed whisper, “that day.”

either jimin’s stupid or she’s just playing dumb. she stares at you, confused. you make some inappropriate gestures with your fingers, until she lights up in recognition.

“that day?” she repeats teasingly.

it’s not like you can ask her for a repeat of that day. you had literally stated outright that it was a one-time thing. she was your boss, for god’s sake. if you slept with her again, you would be breaking all sorts of violations.

“…it was nice…” your cheeks redden, “that’s all.”

the smirk on jimin’s face is unbearable. thank god you’re not the one driving, or you would have gotten a heart attack.

“want to do it again?”

your face gets undeniably hotter. redness flushes through your entire body as you cower.

there’s a moment of decision-making.

was it worth the risk to try again with jimin? for some reason, you know you’re past the phase of attraction. it’s pure interest for her now. you’re not sure if your heart’s fully beyond lust, but there’s something lingering that feels akin to adoration. there’s no doubt that you find jimin extremely good-looking, but like she said before, there was a difference. it’s unfortunate you’re attracted to her as well. maybe she already knew your answer, that’s why she didn’t push for you to reply.

(it would be a resounding yes.)

but jimin was still your boss. what if people in the company found out? they technically couldn’t do anything since jimin was already in the highest position, but if you had to suffer questioning looks and backhanded remarks from them, about how you achieved this job by sleeping around, it would break your heart.

and you don’t want a repeat of hyunjin. you don’t know if you’re ready for another relationship. at least now you’re aware you can actually feel things for others and you’re not some emotionless robot.

but something about jimin pulls you towards her. like two opposite poles of a magnet. there’s something so endearing yet mysterious about the girl that makes you want to try.

“we’re here already, i think my friend lives nearby here,” jimin says as she looks around. she’s parked along the road, your apartment just a few metres away.

you gulp, murmuring softly, “jimin.”

the ceo turns to you, like a little cat.

“can we try dating?”

jimin’s eyebrows shoot upwards, shock evident on her face. after all, you had rejected her not long ago.

“really?” she can barely contain her excitement.

“uh, yeah,” you’re a little uncomfortable with the way she’s staring at you so intensely.

happiness was coursing through her veins. jimin had never expected you would end up giving in. she had a whole plan in her head— first, get you riled up and then convince you to sleep with her again. her second phase consisted of insanely good aftercare that would definitely draw you in into her amazing personality. the last phase was just playing hard to get and making sure you wanted her badly. it seems like she skipped most of the steps. whatever, it doesn’t matter since she got the same end result.

“okay!” jimin beams.

you stare at her stunned.

“uh, so we’re dating now, right?” you repeat.

“mhm!”

her compliance makes you want to jump on her.

“let’s set some boundaries first, okay?”

jimin ponders for a bit before stating confidently, “i have no boundaries! you can do whatever you want.”

it’s a little riveting having her agree with whatever you say. her natural submission is jarring. you laugh, “that’s okay, but i have some rules.”

“go ahead!” jimin’s gazing at you, her eyes wide and rapt with attention. you hold out your hand, pointing at each individual finger, “one, no pda in the office, i don’t want to give people an opportunity to gossip.”

she nods. it would be hard to continue dating if people kept invading your privacy.

“two, we have to keep this a secret,” you continue, “and three, we’re not official yet okay? just dating for now. let’s take it slow.”

“mhm sure.”

“four, don’t call me any nicknames in the office, i’m just seo y/n and you’re karina.”

jimin smirks lazily, her hand resting against the wheel, “you’ll be yu y/n soon.”

“jimin,” you groan at her sleaziness.

“go on!”

you list off the final rule, “five, no special treatment just cause we’re dating. i don’t want people to think i’m getting more opportunities to do well just because we’re dating.”

the ceo blinks.

“okay.”

“okay?”

she hums, content, “yeah. i’m fine with all that.”

you breathe out shakily, “that’s good.”

“mhm. you should get going now,” jimin smiles, “it’s late.”

“right, okay. uh, see you tomorrow?”

the ceo tilts her head, a wide grin on her face, “see you tomorrow, baby.”

your face flushes red.

“jimin.”

“we’re not in the office!”

dating jimin is wonderful. she’s the sweetest and most caring girl on earth. everytime she does something even remotely romantic, you’re swept off your feet. despite your insistence to take it slow, you had only resisted at the start. now, after weeks of dating, you succumbed to jimin’s puppy eyes and begging.

wrapped in her embrace, you snuggle into the crook of her neck even deeper, breathing in her cologne.

jimin only tightens her arms. if it wasn’t for the fact that it was extremely comfortable, you would have complained that she was strangling you.

“baby,” she whispers, planting haste pecks all over your face.

that had been a recurring thing. you realised soon after the first week, jimin loved calling you baby. sometimes you wondered if she forgot your name and called you baby to hide it. the girl, obviously, denied it.

“hm?” your voice comes out muffled.

“you look really cute like this.”

you couldn’t disagree more. adorned in an old oversized sweatshirt that was literally disintegrating by the second, messy bed hair after the nap you had just taken, and a bare face that probably had drool all over.

meanwhile, jimin’s wearing a calvin klein hoodie with little boy shorts that exposed her bare legs. your own legs fitted nicely against hers, tangling your bodies together on the couch.

“i won’t get to see you tomorrow,” jimin says out of the blue.

“why? do you have something going on?”

the ceo groans heartily, “my friends want to have dinner together.”

this puts a frown on your face. originally, you had planned a cute little date for the two of you.

jimin, observant of your turmoil, only runs her fingers through your hair comfortingly, “i know, baby. but we don’t always get this chance. and it’s just dinner! just this once.”

you nod your head, burrowing further into her embrace. jimin only sighs happily, her hand trailing down from your head to your back, rubbing circles repeatedly.

“what are you wearing then?”

“maybe that dress that you really liked? or maybe a random pantsuit.”

you know which dress she’s talking about. an ivory coloured, strapless dress that accentuates her collarbones nicely.

“wear the pantsuit.” something about other people being able to see jimin in that dress doesn’t sit right with you.

a chuckle escapes her, “didn’t you say you liked the dress?”

shrugging, you reply nonchalantly, “don’t want anyone else seeing you in it.”

silence. then a high-pitched squeal.

“y/nnie, you’re so cute!” your head is dramatically pulled back from jimin’s neck and you come face-to-face with the ceo, who’s cooing at you incessantly. she plants multiple pecks all over your face whilst squeezing your jaw tightly.

“jimin!”

the girl finally pulls away from covering your face with kisses, but if it weren’t for her bright red lipstick, she would have seen how underneath all her kiss marks, your face was splashed with maroon.

“if you come with me, then can i wear that dress? i really want to wear it,” jimin pleads.

it's a fair deal in your opinion. you could spend time with her and being able to see jimin in that dress was just a plus. it just leaves the problem of jimin’s wandering hands. even in your office, her hands seem to have a mind of their own, constantly roaming around places they shouldn’t be. like how when you were brewing coffee one morning, jimin had snuck up behind and rested her hands on your waist, whispering a quiet greeting. thank goodness no one else was in the lounge. that surely would have started endless amounts of rumours.

“but we can’t kiss or hug there okay?” you reply, deciding to make a trade-off.

jimin pouts, but she ends up huffing and then nodding.

“just stay by my side. i’ll restrain myself.”

well, that turned out to be a lie.

despite her previous promise of keeping her hands to herself, they somehow ended up entangled in your own. one of her hands lingers between your shoulder blades, and in the car ride to the restaurant, it trailed down to the small of your back. you had scolded jimin for that.

even now, jimin still ensured she was somehow touching you. the restaurant was extremely high-end, evident from the menu which didn’t even have prices on them! you had gone through culture shock with that.

the table was surrounded with people you assumed held equally sophisticated titles, some of them stared at you with curiosity, probably wondering why a newcomer had arrived.

there were a few empty seats, but jimin had informed you that some maybe couldn’t make it, as always.

“so,” one of the extremely gorgeous women had cleared her throat, “are you going to introduce the lovely woman you’ve brought with you, karina?”

jimin smiles as her hand comes to lie on your arm, where your elbow is.

“this is y/n, she’s my colleague,” jimin says, a practised answer. you try to muster up a smile.

“i’m giselle, or aeri, nice to meet you, y/n,” the woman drawls, her tone full of mischief and she had that twinkle in her eyes that reminded you of jimin when she’s about to tickle you.

“how has ceo life been treating you? we haven’t heard from you much,” another woman asks. you notice how cat-like this woman looks. she had beady eyes that were laser-focused on jimin. there’s a chorus of agreement from the rest.

the ceo laughs, “it’s good. i’ve gotten to experience many things. what about the park group that you’ve visited, ryujin? are they still doing well?”

as the now named woman, ryujin, goes into a tirade about the park group, you take the opportunity to identify everyone. most of them were dressed to the nines, their hair all prim and proper, and not a speck of dust on their clothes. just from a quick scale, you could tell they were all extremely wealthy. you listen to ryujin speak while digging into the sirloin steak jimin had ordered for you.

“—and i actually met someone new recently, she should be arriving soon with her brother,” ryujin exclaims. the group chatters excitedly about her newest paramour, while jimin explains that ryujin had gone a few years without a relationship, hence the enthusiasm.

right as you nod, the door to the private room opens and two extremely familiar figures stride in and take their seats.

fuck. you think, unable to control the way your eyes widen. jimin shares the same feeling seemingly, with how she stiffens and a huff escapes her.

“this is hwang yeji and her brother hyunjin,” ryujin beams proudly, unaware of the tension surrounding the table.

“seo y/n?”

your eyes dart downwards, unwilling to face hyunjin. yeji only gasps, “what? oh my gosh, y/n!”

you grit your teeth as hyunjin laughs loudly, “what are you doing here?”

jimin’s hand slithers down to yours, encasing it in a tight but comforting grasp.

ryujin’s head goes back and forth and the table’s filled with surprised chatter and questions.

“how do you guys know each other?”

hyunjin beats you by answering, “she’s my girlfriend.”

what?

you wince a little at how jimin only grips you even more firmly.

“you are?” ryujin exclaims. yeji sends you a sympathetic look, but before she even says anything, aeri interrupts.

“are you a two-timer?” she accuses, eyes blazing with fury, “aren’t you dating jimin?”

your head snaps towards jimin.

“uhm—” she splutters out, “i— okay! it just slipped out and i told aeri to play pretend!”

“what?! you’re dating her?” hyunjin suddenly barks. you groan, wondering why you even got involved with these people. they were all insane!

“wait, so who are you actually dating?” ryujin finally asks. you sigh, “i’m dating jimin.”

a scoff escapes hyunjin.

“you’re actually with her? i can’t believe you jumped into bed with someone else right after we broke up! i knew you were a slut from the beginning.”

a chorus of gasps echo from the table. you should feel saddened that someone you cared for previously was throwing insults at you, but you don’t feel anything. yet, the same couldn’t be said for jimin, who rises up from her seat abruptly, and tosses her glass of champagne at hyunjin.

“don’t talk about her like that.”

“are you fucking serious?!”

“shut the fuck up,” jimin seethes, “and don’t let me hear you utter her name from that filthy mouth of yours ever again.”

hyunjin’s hair down to his tailored suit, drenched in expensive champagne that is probably worth more than your apartment. you watch as his face turns an angry red, and you can almost see the steam coming out from his ears. his mouth opens to retort but he can only gape furiously.

“you’re pathetic and i pity the people that have to be in your company. you forget yourself. don’t you dare come into my sight. my eyes aren’t adjusted to the filth that you are.”

hyunjin stands up from his chair but yeji pulls him back down harshly.

“i can’t believe my girlfriend saw anything but a deplorable man in you.”

you’re left jaw-dropped. jimin grits her teeth before tossing you a look, “c’mon y/n, let’s go.”

she pulls you out of your chair and as you leave, you turn back, sending an apologetic look to the others at the table. aeri only guffaws and ryujin yells, “you didn’t pay for the food!”

jimin’s hand doesn’t leave yours, and you’re a little shocked at how quickly and agile she moves even in heels. your heart’s beating a mile, both from surprise and the adrenaline coursing through your veins. when you reach the car, jimin slams the door shut and she deflates in her seat.

“oh my god,” she says.

“oh my god indeed,” you parrot, still in awe of jimin’s reaction. it was crazy, but you can’t lie, it was attractive having her stand up for you like that.

she turns to you, “i can’t believe i just did that.”

“yeah, me neither,” you laugh, “this is the second time you’ve called him pathetic.”

jimin pouts, so unlike the girl from before, “he just made me really mad! holy shit, aeri’s blowing up my phone.”

you’re reminded of something that aeri slipped out.

“jimin,” you place a hand on her arm as she checks the messages, “so you told aeri about us?”

the ceo turns to you, eyes glistening and her lips pursed out cutely, obviously as an attempt to cull your anger, “i really didn’t mean to! please believe me baby. she just asked me why i was so happy recently and then asked if i was seeing someone and you know i can’t lie to aeri… so i told her about you and—”

“hey, calm down,” you chuckle at the way jimin’s turning red from how quickly she rambled. she catches her breath as her chest heaves, “i’m sorry. i know i broke the rule.”

“it’s okay, jimin. i’m not mad,” you reassure.

jimin’s eyes perk up, “really?”

“yeah, it’s fine. i think it’s really sweet that you stood up for me today.”

“i’ll always stand up for you, you know that right? don’t you remember my promise of helping you whenever?” jimin says earnestly. you smile at her cuteness and sincerity.

you don’t know what this feeling is. the chasing thrill every time jimin’s hands are on yours. the gleamy look in her eyes. the curve of her crooked smile. but it feels similar to love.

“jimin-ah,” you mumble. it’s the most unromantic place and time ever— jimin’s car, parked next to a gloomy lamppost, right after she had just poured champagne on your ex.

but because it’s with jimin, it feels perfect.

you can’t believe you ever thought of rejecting the girl prior.

“yes?”

“i really really like you,” you tuck a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. it’s a shame jimin’s dress couldn’t be properly admired today with all the ruckus. but that’s fine, you had plenty of opportunities to do so in the future.

“i really really like you too,” jimin whispers, as if it’s a secret.

you grin, “you looked really attractive just now. i think you’re god’s gift to earth.”

“mhm. you’re perfect too,” she sighs dreamily, “i really don’t mind giving you my everything.”

it sounds like a confession of love. maybe it’s jimin’s own way, but you both know it’s too early, even if the feeling rivals the purest form of affection and adoration.

“i liked it when you called me your girlfriend,” you admit. jimin beams, “so can i call you my girlfriend? can i be yours?”

you nod shyly at how jimin phrases the question. it’s not whether you’re hers, it’s whether she’s yours. and it’s a barely noticeable difference, but it only makes your heart pound more rapidly against your ribcage.

minjeong likes her job. it’s easygoing and the pay’s good. her colleagues are all really nice too. it’s an enjoyable job. she especially enjoys the company of her sunbae from high school. but recently, despite minjeong’s annoyance, her senior has been spending more and more time in the ceo’s office, and not at her desk. the usual conversations between them had gone so quickly and minjeong missed her sunbae’s presence.

she wonders if the ceo is holding you hostage. she’s seen the mountain of papers on your desk before, but she chalked it up to you just being an overachiever.

“minjeong,” her head lifts up, it’s mark lee and team manager kim gesturing at her to come over. their behaviour is strange, minjeong immediately notices, huddled in a corner of the lounge and whispering conspiratorially.

“what’s up? is something wrong?”

manager kim shakes her head and instead asks the damning question of, “do you think y/n and our boss are hooking up?”

what!

“uhm,” minjeong mumbles, “i don’t know?”

mark only nudges minjeong’s shoulder, “wait till y/n comes out of karina’s office and just look at her neck. she might have a few hickies.”

minjeong doesn’t think so, but she agrees to be their lookout and she waits patiently for you to come out. once the door swings open, minjeong catches a glance of karina adjusting her blazer and your hands pulling at the collar of your blouse.

huh. that’s strange.

she trods over to you, a faux smile on her face as she says, “are you in trouble again? you’re always in karina’s office!”

minjeong watches as your eyes widen and you clear your throat, “y-yeah… we were talking about a report… i made a few mistakes.”

her own eyes trail from your face to your poorly hidden neck, where a few bruises reside.

suddenly, everything clicks into place. the frazzled look you always had, the way karina would come out all messy— and the hickies!

minjeong can’t control the words that come out next.

“oh my god— you’re fucking the boss?!”

[1luvkarina]

lose control

aespa

pairing - aeri uchinaga x fem!reader

genre - gxg, 18+, bully x nerd, non-idol x non-idol

synopsis - in which, you find yourself inside of the bathroom of huh yunjin’s house with your bully, aeri uchinaga.

warning - MEN & MINORS DNI, top!giselle, reader receiving, mommy kink, degrading

a/n: first time writing smut so…🫣

You didn’t know why you let your friends talk you into coming to this party, but here you were standing outside of the crowded driveway of Huh Yunjin’s house with Yeji, Chaeryoung, Ryujin, Lia and Yuna wearing a red dress that showed off your curves perfectly and a pair of black heels.

“Guys, I don’t know.” you say worriedly, looking at the five girls in front of you.

“Oh come on, you’ll be fine!” Ryujin says, rolling her eyes at your worried expression.

Letting out a sigh as Yuna linked her arm with yours and the six of you walked inside of the house. Entering the house, you nervously looked around, Yeji, Ryujin and Chaeryoung had disappeared leaving you with Yuna and Lia.

Aeri looked around trying to scanning the scenery from the kitchen with Jimin and Minjeong by her side as Yizhou rushed towards them with an excited grin on her face.

“What’s got you so happy?” Jimin asked, looking at the younger girl with a raised eyebrow.

“You won’t believe who came with Yeji and her crew.” Yizhou says, looking directly at Aeri who seemed interested by the Chinese girls words.

“Who?” Aeri asked, placing her red solo cup down on the counter behind her.

“Jang Y/n.” Yizhou says, earning shocked looks from the three girls in front of her.

“There’s no way.” Minjeong says, as she looked around from where she was standing trying to spot the nerdy girl.

Aeri scanned the crowd of people as well, wanting to see if what Yizhou said was actually true. She saw Yeji, Ryujin and Chaeryoung all together talking with Chaewon and Sakura, which made her wonder where Yuna and Lia were.

Jimin rolled her eyes taking a sip of her drink not believing the sophomore, “Maybe you had too much to drink.”

Yizhou looked at the older girl and pouted, “I’m telling the truth! She’s here and she looks so different!”

Jimin shook her head, leaning back against the counter before turning her gaze towards the kitchen’s archway were Yuna and Lia walked in with a unfamiliar girl following behind them.

“Wait, who’s that with Yuna and Lia?” Jimin asked, gaining the other three girls attention.

Aeri looked at the trio that just entered the kitchen, her eyes scanning the unknown girl and she shrugged also wondering the same thing. The four girls watched as you hesitantly followed behind Yuna and Lia, who were pulling you into the kitchen.

“Come on, Y/n!” Yuna says, pulling you over towards the kitchen island where the bottles of alcohol and solo cups were sitting.

Upon hearing the name, Jimin, Aeri and Minjeong’s eyes widened in surprise. They weren’t expecting for the mystery girl to be Jang Y/n, who always kept her head buried in a book or spent her time in the library. Yizhou looked at her three friends with a smirk as she took a sip of her drink with a plan in her mind. The sophomore girl walked up to the trio, squeezing her way in between you and Lia with a soft smile on her face.

“Hey guys!” Yizhou says, greeting the three of you watching as you looked at your two friends and then over towards the other three girls who were watching the interaction silently.

“Hi, Ning.” you greeted the girl, taking the cup that Yuna had handed you.

You didn’t really have a problem with the girl since you’re parents were close friends, plus you’d often help her with her homework whenever she needed it.

“Y/nnie, I didn’t know you were going to be here.” Yizhou says, tilting her head slightly while staring at you.

“I was dragged here.” you say, laughing softly as Yizhou giggled.

“Well, you look great.” Yizhou says, wrapping her arm around your waist which caused you to blush. “You should dress like this more often.”

Unbeknownst to you both, Aeri was glaring at Yizhou as a tight feeling was in her chest. She couldn’t be jealous, there was no way in hell she was jealous of the way one of her best friends was talking with you. She gripped her cup tightly in her hands which gained Jimin and Minjeong’s attention, the two looked at Aeri and then at each other with knowing looks. Angrily, Aeri walked out of the kitchen heading somewhere to clear her head.

Yizhou turned her attention away from the three girls and her eyes followed after the Japanese girl who had just left, a small smirk on her lips knowing that her plan had worked.

•••••••

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom.” you say, looking at Yuna and Lia who both nodded before you walked out of the kitchen in search of the bathroom.

You walked down the hallway away, pushing through the crowd of people trying to find the bathroom before bumping into someone causing their drink to drop to the floor.

“I am so sorry.” you apologized, looking up at the person only to lock eyes with Aeri. “Oh, I take that back then.”

Aeri scoffed and glared at you, for some reason she felt jealous after seeing the way you and Yizhou were flirting with each other in the kitchen.

“You think you’re so smart, don’t you?” she whispered, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “Always hiding behind those big glasses and those books. I wonder what you’d do if someone broke through that perfect little facade.”

You rolled your eyes as you pushed past her and continued making your way up the bathroom, causing Aeri to chuckle in amusement. Before she grabbed your hand and pushed you up against the wall.

“Wh-what are you doing?” you stuttered, now feeling nervous due to how close Aeri was.

Her right hand started to trail down your hip making it’s way towards the hem of your dress, her fingers tracing your thigh. She noticed how tense you had been ever since you had walked into the kitchen with Yuna and Lia.

Aeri stepped closer, her breath hot against your ear. “I think it’s time you learned what it’s like to lose control.”

Your breath hitched as her hand slipped into underneath your dress and she started to rub your clothed pussy. Aeri chuckled as she watched as you bit your lip to hold back your moans.

"Go ahead and moan for me princess," her voice was now deep and raspy which made you even more turned on than before "I want to hear those beautiful noises." She picked up her pace causing you to let out a moan, she slipped a finger into your panties rubbing your clit causing you to let out a whimper.

"You like that princess?" she whispered into your ear as you nodded silently, "Words princess, use your words."

"Y-yes..” you stuttered out trying not to moan at the feeling of her index finger rubbing circles around your clit.

"Yes, what?" she asked with a smirk staring at you with a lustfully look.

"Yes mommy." you moaned making her fingers move faster, while kissing your neck.

"Good girl, how about we go somewhere private?" she asked removing her hand and pulling you towards the bathroom.

Aeri pulled you inside, closing the door and locking it behind her before pulling you into a deep and heated kiss. Before you know it, she had pushed your panties aside and inserted two of her fingers inside of your pussy causing you to moan loudly.

“So wet.” she whispered into your ear, as she continued moving her fingers in and out of you.

The sound of your moans were driving Aeri crazy and it made her want you even more, still fingering your wet pussy with her right hand. She started to kiss your jaw lightly, as your soft moans entered her ear.

"I'm going to fuck you so good princess.” She mumbled, kissing down your neck biting and sucking the skin leaving marks. "God I've been waiting for this moment for so long," she says lowly, picking you up and placing you on the bathroom counter.

You watched as she pulled your legs open, spreading them wide enough for her to see your soaked pussy. She pulled off your panties fully and looked at you with a smirk before kneeling down, trailing kisses along your thigh making her way up towards your pussy before latching her mouth onto your clit causing you to let out a loud moan as Aeri sucked on your clit.

"Oh fuck!" you yelled, gripping her hair and pushing her face deeper into your cunt. “Mommy!”

Without realizing she started to fingering your cunt again as she licked your folds, your back arched as you pulled onto her hair as she moaned sending vibrations through your body.

“F-fuck, mommy.” you stuttered out in between moans, “I’m going to cum.” as you cummed all over her face.

Aeri hummed in satisfaction into your cunt, upon hearing that you were going to cum. “Go on, cum for me.”

And soon enough your legs were shaking as the knot in your stomach went away and you cummed onto Aeri’s tongue and her fingers. "You taste so good, princess." she says, her tongue still licking your folds.

“Y/n, are you…” Yuna says, opening the door to see you sitting on the counter with Aeri in between your legs eating you out.

Yuna and Lia stood in the doorway with wide eyes as Aeri pulled back from your cunt and looked at your two friends standing in the doorway with a raised eyebrow.

“We’re gonna…” Lia says as she pushed Yuna away, “Go.”

Lia gave you a knowing look as she closed the door back, leaving you and Aeri alone in the bathroom again. Aeri stood up while licking her lips tasting the sweetness of your juices, staring into your eyes which caused you to blush.

“We should do this again sometime, without your friends walking in..” Aeri says, chuckling and moving a piece of your hair out of your face. “See ya, loser.”

And with that she opened the door and left the bathroom, leaving you sitting on the counter in shock as your heart raced. You got down and slipped your panties back on before walking out of the bathroom where your friends were waiting for you.

“So how was it?” Ryujin asked, smirking at you as Chaeryoung hit her arm. “Ow! It was just a question!”

Yeji shook her head and walked away from you all towards the exit as Yuna and Lia linked their arms with yours, both giggling while Ryujin and Chaeryoung were playfully fighting. As you were walking out of the house, the six of you walked past the stairs where Aeri was standing leaning against the railing while her friends were sitting on the steps talking. Locking eyes with the senior girl, she smirked at you and gave a wink before turning back to her conversation.

[luvyeni]

RED STRING THEORY ,, 이동혁

pairings ‎⸝⸝⸝ lee haechan x fem!reader wc. 2k

genre. smut, soulmate au (?)

🦢◞ includes ... making out, oral sex ( male receiving ), unprotected sex

「 authors note 𖹭 」 this idea has been sitting in my notes since 2023 but I could never think of how to write it.

❪ masterlist! ❫

all your friends loved to say you and donghyuck are soulmates; tied together by a red invisible string, that you're destined to be together much like in your other lives— maybe that was true, and you did actually care for the boy in a another universe or timeline… but you knew for a fact in this time you wanted to wrap your hands around his—

“yn?” you were brought from your thoughts. “you okay?” you roommate yeji asked. “of course not the love of her life isn't here.” the irritating voice made your eye twitch. “you thinking of me baby?” lee donghyuck, haechan or your personal favorite jackass sat down next to you. “you know what yeah i was , i was thinking all about you”

everyone sitting at the lunch table stopped what they were doing. “seriously?” you hummed , nodding. “i told you guys she loved , tell me baby, what were you thinking about?” renjuns face turned in disgust. “i didn't consent to hearing your sex fantasy about haechan that you just had in public, might i add.” you turned to the boy , your hands resting on his shoulders, his eyes widened.

“i was thinking of taking my hand.” your friends watching, dragging your hand up his neck. “d-don't you think we should do this in private, not in front of our friends.” you started to squeeze. “i think she's trying to kill him.” jaemin whispered. “taking my hand , and squeezing , until your eyes pop.”

your friends erupted into laughter as you released the boy , he rubbed his neck. “yn i think you really scared him this time.” jeno said. “him? no.” you turned to the boy who was staring lovingly at you. “you see.” you rolled your eyes. “why can't you admit that you like me, love , make it easy for yourself?” everyone sighed knowing the rant he was about to go on. “we're perfect for each other.”

“yeah? how.” you said. “i'm hot and your hot , and it's obvious we were in love in our past lives,” he said. “haechan i’ve explained to you that the invisible string theory isn't real.” you argued back. “yeah how would i know about the birth mark on your lower back?” he did have a point , it was too low for anyone to see. “yeah how does he know that?” yeji asked. “because he's a creep that's why.” you stood up , needing to leave for your next class. “or maybe in our past lives our favorite position was doggy style , i couldn't forget that even in a new life.” he smirked, you shook your head. “i'm going to class.”

the boy followed behind you; sadly you had the same classes. “we're even in the same class.” he sat down next to you. “yeah and im still not sure if you did that on purpose.” the professor walked in before he could say something. “god heard my prayers.”

“there's a new project due , 30% of your grade for this semester.” you groaned , you hated projects. “let's do it together.” haechan said, he knew you were serious about school so he never bothered you during class , he actually never bothered you unless he knew it would stress you out. “why would i torture myself in such a manor?” he smiled. “I love our little talks.” you shook your head , standing up. “goodbye donghyuck.”

“wait yn, i'm serious,” he said. “you know me and you are the best in this class, we'll sure get an A on this.” you kissed your teeth, you hated when hebwas right, he loved to fuck around , but when it came to his work he was serious. “fine.” his eyes widened. “seriously?”

“yeah , let's go.” he quickly gathered his things. “you can't take it back now.” you rolled your eyes. “let's go.” he nodded. “back to your place?” you saw the smirk on his face. “yeji is home , and hell will freeze over before i ever come over to your house of horrors.” you walked away, he followed behind. “so that means there's a chance?”

“where are you going?” you opened the door to yeji about to leave. “jaemin called me and told me he saw you both walking towards our dorm together, i thought he was high again.” she stopped. “we’re working on a project together, sadly beside me he's the only other smarter one in the class.” haechan smiled. “see she knows how to compliment me.”

“i told him you'd be here so he would start anything.” you said , “but it seems like you aren't.” yeji shook her head. “work, one of my co workers called off , if you want groceries for the next month , i have to leave now.” she said , walk right out the door. “see even the universe wants us together.”

“my bedroom, let's go.” you walked. “if you like to be in charge i'm down.” he followed you. “haechan you're here to help with the project.” you said flatly. “i know , i know don't worry , i'll sit down and listen.” he sat on your bed , you cringed. “oh im sorry would you like for me to take my clothes off for your comfort?” you sat down in your chair. “no , i can just change it when you leave.” he smirked. “how about i give you a better reason to change them.” you glared at him , even though this time , you let a little smile slip. “fine, fine let's do the project.” he threw his hands up. “thank you.” you turned around facing your laptop. “but i saw that smile.”

you both actually did get half of your project done; you closed your laptop turning around in your chair, sighing. “you did good , kept your word and actually got work done.” you praised the boy. “don't you think i deserve a reward.” he laid back on your bed. “you can get your things and go.” he faked laughed. “no one is here, you can drop the act that you hate me.” you raised your eyebrows. “you think this is an act?” he nodded. “i do.”

“why is that?” you questioned, he shrugged. “you invited me to your apartment , you never do that even if it's with the other guys.” he said, “you invited me into your room with no one else home.” he smirked. “you love me.”

“you're cocky , that's why i don't like you.” you scoffed. “i think that's what you like about me the most.” he winked. “i see the twinkle in your pretty eyes , you mean to tell me you don't believe the string theory even a little bit?” you stood up shaking your head , walking over to your door. “and with that , good night haechan.” you opened it , showing him out.

he stood up, walking over to you and the door; you thought he was about to leave , but he stopped in front of you. “haechan what are you…” before you could even finish it , he was closing the door , pushing you against it. “hyuck.” he smirked. “now i'm hyuck , what happened to donghyuck?” he grabbed your hips , pulling you flush against him. “pretending to hate me this entire time; when in reality you're just as horny for me as i am for you.”

he closed the already miniscule gap in between you both; your lips dancing with each other , bodies grinding against each other. “bed.” you sighed , he kept his mouth on as he guided you to your bed , pushing you down on the bed. “what happened to letting me be in charge?” you said breathlessly. “that was before , this is now.”

he climbed on the bed , laying against the headboard. “come.” you climbed into his lap , straddling him. “look at you so desperate , take your top off baby.” you lifted your arms up pulling the shirt over your head. “nice tits.” he winked, you rolled your eyes. “i wish i had a gag.” he hummed. “oh , really?” you nodded. “get on your knees , i got one for you.”

you would've rolled your eyes at his corny ass humor , but you were too horny; getting on your knees in front of him , he unbuckled his pants , lifting his hands up , pulling his pants down enough to let his cock free , bobbing against his stomach , tan skin; red and ready to be sucked. “you keep looking at it baby, how about putting that pretty mouth to use.”

you finally put your hand around his length , giving his tip a kiss , he hissed. “fuck.” he sighed , he must've been in some sort of sex dream , but he didn't want wake up if it was. “k-keep going.” if someone told you that you'd be doing this to lee haechan , in your bed, you would've assumed they were doing drugs. “fuuuuck , just like i imagined, keep sucking my cock love.” his head was thrown back against the headboard , his hip bucking up into your mouth , you gagged around him. “sorry love -fuck- i'm about to fucking cum.”

he was loud , if yeji was to come home or if any of the boys decided they want to remember the password to your door like they sometimes do; they would for sure be able to hear him at least. “fuck im cumming.”

you pulled off him , he groaned; wiping your mouth. “you came so much.” you coughed. “ and do you purposely eat pineapples or something?” your voice was scratchy. “could never be so sure,” he said. “freak.” you crawled back into his lap. “yeah , why are you grinding on me then?” you softly moaned. “go-good sex.” he scoffed. “how will you know if i never fucked you?”

“if you keep teasing you never will.” he didn't say anything else , pulling your panties to the side , grinding his hips up, rubbing his cock along your folds , his tip catching your clit. “fuck hyuck , put it in.” you lifted your hips, he held his cock right at your entrance. “sit on it baby.”

both of you moaned out as you felt him fill you out. “g-goddamn.” you hissed. “you're fucking big.” he smirked, you wanted to smack it right off of him. “i know love, -fuck- you've been missing out.” he cursed. “could've been bouncing on my cock almost two years ago , but instead you've been such a bitch to me.” he moaned.

he was holding your ass in his hand as you bounced on his cock , his mouth on your tips , sucking on your nipples. “fuck hyuck im gonna cum!” you gasped out , he pushed your hips down , fucking his hips up at a fast pace. “hyuck fuck!” you screamed. “fuck i'm gonna cum.” you gripped his hair. “oh fuck i love that , pull it again.”

you gripped his hair as you came around him , your cunt sucking him in , cumming. “shit love , im gonna fucking cum.” he held you down , thrusting a few times , before he came with a sigh. “sh-shit.” he had a dumb smile on his face , as he came down from one of the best highs he's ever had. “did i fuck you dumb?” he scoffed. “it takes a lot to fuck me dumb baby , pretty sure that would happen to you before me.” you rolled your eyes. “you wanna bet baby?” he flipped you over with a smirk. “you better hope yeji doesn't come back.”

…

“wait hold on.” renjun said. “you came onto him?” you rolled your eyes. “i’ve been chasing her this entire time , and this one time she got me alone.” you scoffed at the boy who had his arm around your shoulder. “it was the bed line wasn't it?” yeji spoke up. “what bed line.” you said , “no more questions.”

“so i guess you kinda have to believe in the red string theory now.” jaemin said. “yeah , it just took a little longer to work this time.” jeno followed. “come on love , just tell them , you believe it now , even just a bit it.” you thought for a bit , smiling.

“okay maybe i believe in the theory just a little bit.”

©LUVYENI

[cherry-yunas]

ITZY Throwback : Orange sports bra Yeji was way too fine

Medical fundraiser for Sera <3

[capslocked]

KINKVEMBER DAY: 8

[prompt: phone sex]

male reader x shin ryujin

16k words

The phone rings one too many times, and Ryujin is in the middle of scrunching up the paper slip that Chaeryeong handed her earlier that afternoon when she hears your voice.

The sounds of her scrambling for the receiver and her head smacking against the headboard come through in pretty good quality.

That never gets old.

"Stimulating conversations," you offer smoothly, like it isn't a euphemism and instead some high-brow intellectual pursuit. "How can I help you?"

Ryujin is speechless for an unbearable five, ten seconds until she lets out the kind of low chuckle that probably sounds better than it looks. "Hi," she says, "hello, I, uh- I don't know how all of this works."

"Why don't we start with who you're looking to speak with tonight?" you ask.

Ryujin sighs. She runs a hand through her hair, looking at the messy tangle of clothes on her bedroom floor with mild resentment. She’ll take her chances, figuring a direct approach is the best route when she doesn't really know where any of the lines get drawn or who is allowed to say what and who isn't.

"Um. Okay. Who you got?"

"We have a large variety of operators to suit any taste," you explain kindly. She appreciates that. "Do you have someone specific in mind? A gender perhaps, to start?"

"Well," Ryujin starts, running her tongue along the edges of her teeth. Lia has this thing she constantly says, that there's always a thousand and one reasons not to do something, and Ryujin is the first person to make fun of her for it - but here she is, finally putting that adage to use.

"I was actually calling to, um," she exhales loudly. "A guy? I mean look - girls. Girls are great, but if you - mmm." She clears her throat. Because she knows how she wants to do this, and it's most definitely: "A man."

You wait for a second before replying, and Ryujin allows the stillness to expand over and fill out every corner of her bedroom before a bright, "Alrighty, well," comes filtering out her phone, tinny but as enticing as ever. "That would be me."

"Oh."

"Yeah," you reply, easy and unhurried. You sound exactly like the kind of person whose company people pay handsomely to be around; the professionalism is undeniable, but there's something to be said for your tone. The softness to the vowels, the almost imperceptible upward lilt to the words - Ryujin gets that, maybe.

You're pretty confident in the answer, but you ask anyway, "have you ever done anything like this?"

Ryujin opens her mouth and hesitates for a brief moment.

"Well," she muses. She's tried porn, she's tried her own fantasies, she's tried cranking up the hot water and touching herself with the head of the shower aimed somewhere she's told by other girls: it's there, free of charge. "I haven't."

"But you have a boyfriend," you state. "You have a man, who you enjoy things with?"

Ryujin laughs nervously. "It's...it's been a little while. Not recently. Sorry. I know you don't-"

"No, no, not at all, you're doing fine, it's just that you sound very attractive over the phone. Excuse the assumption."

Ryujin laughs and rakes her fingers through her fringe. She knows it's a line, but she laughs anyway. She could - if she was looking for the deranged fulfillment of it - pore through a billion comments on instagram, on twitter that call her a lot of things: gorgeous, beautiful, hot. The last comment she read before almost deleting her app entirely was someone who decided to textually imitate a dog barking to a picture Yeji had taken of her in a coffee shop. There's a novelty, she thinks, in being charmed by someone who has no idea who she is.

"You have good ears then," she says, smirking into the receiver. "So do you normally do, what, ask questions? I have no idea."

"Yeah, it helps me build a profile," you reply, "but if you had something else in mind-"

"No, please, shoot." She grabs the pillow from behind her back and flops against the mattress, staring up into the ceiling fan.

"Do you feel comfortable sharing your age with me?"

"Twenty," she answers without missing a beat, even though that isn't right. It's weirdly important to her, keeping it private, and she isn't sure why - but then you say something pleasant and complimentary about college and new experiences that she's unable to register, and you ask her for her name so quick she just blurts it out:

"Ryujin."

"Pretty."

"Fuck," Ryujin grins, immediately chewing on her knuckle to bite back a gasp. "Sorry. The name is cute or, whatever. Whatever. Sorry for the curse. God, I don't really have a filter - what about you? Do you have a name, Mr. Operator?"

"I do."

Ryujin lifts a leg up and puts it down again. She doesn't know if she should already have taken off her pajamas or if that's weird. Or if the fact that it doesn't bother her means this is more or less wholesome. She turns over onto her stomach, humming into the phone and now she doesn't know why she's thinking about your face. You could be- well, fuck, you could be anyone, but there's this gnawing compulsion to put something together.

You tell her your name and she scoffs for a second, before quieting down and returning you a, "pretty."

"Ryujin, tell me." There's probably a slightly too long pause from your end of the line before you get on with asking her, "when was your last orgasm?"

She drops the phone right in her face. It bounces off the bridge of her nose before landing in bedsheets beside her and her eyes are welling with tears while she scrambles blindly across her bed, cursing into the receiver and squirming. She pulls the phone to her ear and catches the last couple seconds of you reassuring her that it's okay, that it's completely fine if she's hung up or gone.

"Actually, I have," and she curls her fingers into a fist, "never came in my whole life."

You clear your throat to keep a less than professional sound from coming out. A quiet space she feels necessary to fill: “Not even once.”

"Really?"

"I know. And I've only recently realized that's, uh - er- a pretty un-normal thing." Ryujin makes a waving motion with her hand even though you can't see it, trailing off into silence and blushing furiously. "Sorry," she apologizes. She doesn't know what she’s apologizing for, but she does it again. "Sorry about that."

"I should be the one feeling sorry for you," you rib.

"Fucking tell me about it."

"Hey, this reminds me, would you be averse to the idea of touching yourself?"

The question stutters Ryujin in her tracks, and she doesn't even say no but a drawn-out "nngh" leaks out before she can stumble into something more intelligible. "Isn't that, like, what you're supposed to do on these calls?"

"Every call is different, Ryujin."

She chews on her lower lip, rolling it under her front teeth. You say her name like you know her, and it's throwing her for a loop. The comfort you have with the whole situation - asking her a million questions and not demanding answers, taking cues and reassurances in stride and turning everything into some sort of ploy for getting her naked. Fuck, she'll take a bit of a plunge:

"Should I be touching myself?"

"It's not my place to say."

"Okay, well that's kind of a frustrating answer."

"So you're saying you like being told what to do," you tell her, and you hear the sharp inhale in reply.

"If I knew what I liked, you think I'd be calling a sex hotline and hoping some stranger might take pity on me?"

You laugh out loud, and her response is the quickest, the cutest little, "seriously!" before she chuckles too.

"Ryujin?" you ask.

"Yeah?"

"Are you straight?"

She nearly chokes - because it's like you're able to just read her mind - and if you can do that then there's nothing you can't do, maybe. And here, excitement feels a lot like apprehension. She twists and curls in on herself, thighs rubbing together, the flat of her hand traveling across her stomach.

"I'm-"

"Because no one should have to pretend that they're interested in guys," you interrupt her and, god, for as much time as she's spent dwelling on that, she wishes it were that simple. 

It would be a hell of a lot easier if she knew why she wanted to get her face between Yeji's thighs and drag her tongue all over her clit until that prettier-than-perfect face of hers cinches up in a pleasure that comes with just the right amount of agony - or if she knew why she didn't feel anything like remorse or guilt or envy when her boyfriend came around instead of wanting, you know, to get on her knees with her mouth around his cock too -

Fuck, it's all very complicated.

"Straight," she answers. She likes cock, as much as anyone realistically can, and she knows the body on a man can get her dripping and easy in all the right ways. So, she just swallows. Says, "straight enough."

"If you were to touch yourself, right now, and someone - say, a man - were telling you exactly what to do: what would spring to mind, if anything."

"Mmm. Is this you asking me to touch myself?"

"Again. That's up to you."

Your voice is light. Very pleasant. Very male, Ryujin realizes. She gulps.

"Can you, I mean," she says, running a hand down the length of her thigh, pressing down at the hollow.

"Ryujin,” you say, letting her mull over how it sounds in your mouth. “Take a breath for me, please."

Her exhale leaves her with a heavy push and she tries not to laugh. Nervous tic. She's getting goosebumps, but she feels warmer than before.

"We could say this isn't the first time, you and me, in some very broad and abstract sense. How does that make you feel?"

"Strange." She touches her outer thighs again and arches her back. "Kind of horny," she admits. And it is odd - your words, the things you say - and maybe it's her nerves because the experience is new, and so are you, and so are her feelings, all wrapped in one.

"Do you want to do something about that?"

There's silence between you for what seems like a very long time, your breathing quiet but apparent - a signal you haven't abandoned her in some state of vulnerability. Ryujin inhales deeply. She's shaking in her fingertips. The tension has her taut and waiting, and that's funny, really, because it's what she's been doing for years. The rubbing. The touching.

Her hips rock forward gently and she answers the unasked question with a sweetly husked, "uh-huh."

"What are you wearing?"

"Ah, really?" Ryujin laughs. Her fingers pause at her waistline. "That old, bad porn trope."

"I like hearing about people's clothes, is all," you excuse yourself lightly. "Helps me get a sense of things."

"Yeah, alright. Sweats. Baggy ones." Her lips fall apart. "Shirt."

"Is that all? Nothing sexy."

"What's sexy?"

"Sexy is…"

She listens to you mull it over, listening for a ruffling or two. "For a girl with a nice body - some body - some curves," you continue, and Ryujin has to drop another finger to the hot line of her thigh, her lower belly. "You need lace. Silk. You've gotta leave the best bits a little hidden, at least for a while longer."

"Wow. You sound a hell of a lot like you'd enjoy taking someone's pants off," she half-teases. "Do you make all your calls like this? One sordid fantasy at a time, huh?"

"Something like that," you reply. And then, as if reading her mind, "are you doing anything, right now?"

"I'm touching myself," she exhales. "Are you?"

"Ryujin, not yet. Please be patient."

She makes a face even though you can't see it or taunt her. That's an unfair request - you have an unfair request.

"Just, wait," you tell her. She's drawing lazy, winding circles across her thigh. "Let me show you something, will you do that for me?"

"But, what."

"Tell me everything. All the things you're thinking. Things you want to do."

"Everything?"

"Yes."

She blinks away her initial disbelief and reaches around for her lamp to switch it off. Until it's just the hallway light peeking in through the crack between her door and the door jamb and you, a stranger who won't be seeing her face or hearing her say anything stupid. She shakes out a few more breaths, shuffles against the sheets, and glides her fingertips past her belly button.

Her hand rises up her stomach in one decisive movement, until her fingers curl beneath the bottoms of her bra, trapped in its underwire. "I'm thinking - unh - about, ah. My friend?"

You're quiet and let the silence linger, until she seems like she might not find her way; so you repeat, "Go ahead."

"And a guy she used to like, fuck, she'd show up here, drunk on, ah. A weeknight. Somewhere, fuck, around midnight. Walk past me into the kitchen where we had the - the light. God." Her hips stutter and she grits out the rest through her teeth. "In the refrigerator. Ah, yeah, a midnight snack. Always looked way too fucking good for, um, oh, for a casual booty-call."

"Does your friend have a name?"

"Yuna," she practically pants, and immediately realizes she shouldn't have said that either.

"Did you always know what was going on? Between Yuna and her-"

"Boy-toy, yes - it was so obvious, I always knew, yeah," she said, clumsily grabbing the sheets with one hand as she drifts further between the peaks. "Just - fuck - he'd be picking at, ah, something with chopsticks."

"In your kitchen?"

"My, uh, table. And I'd be working up the nerve to ask."

You sigh over the phone, "ask him what?"

"What it was, like, I knew she was only- shit." She keens high in her throat. "What it was like, fucking taking that cock of his, and bending Yuna's tight little, ah, ass over and, mm, railing her on the side of her fucking bed - and just pumping her full of cum just like that until- Jesus, she would walk around after and sometimes-"

You groan softly. This encouraging little sound.

"-fuck - sorry, I mean. Yeah, he, sometimes he'd make her walk around with his, ah, stuff inside. Down her fucking pants and, it's like, fucking disgusting, I swear-"

"And?" You breathe a heavy edged noise over the line.

Actually okay, so maybe this was more than she bargained for, maybe she bit off more than she can chew - maybe, she feels like her insides are collapsing; all the fire pooling around in her stomach and gathering into a melting sort of weightlessness.

"And it makes me feel fucking-"

"Fucking what."

"Why am I talking about this, why-"

"Talking to me? Fucking wet, Ryujin, answer the question."

She pants down at her phone and then turns her face into her forearm, rubbing and making sounds. She thinks about, oh, fucking Yuna and how she showed up to hang out once, with cum leaking down the crease of her inner thigh, smearing against her skin and down between her legs.

"Wet." She swallows. "How do I-"

"Say that you wish it was you," you tell her. "That you wanted that, to be fucked. To feel a cock inside."

Her head falls back. "That," she manages, "fucking, that."

You drawl so that the question might roll off, easy: "Is that the kind of girl you are? Told not to curse, not supposed to let anyone else play with you - you just need it, don't you? Do you need someone's cum? Just tell me."

"I think so, ah," and she stops moving her hand. "I think I'm gonna go now. This is fucking embarrassing, like. Okay, sorry."

"Don't hang up," you tell her, and the soft edge to it is one she really wants to indulge. "Don't," you repeat, a little louder.

You start talking, about the same sorts of things she's imagined herself: the sex and the sounds and what he can do to her. You build a slow and aching heat between her thighs that has her dripping through her underwear and grinding against her fingers. Telling her how she's the one that needs to be filled, needs a man who can wrap her legs around his waist, get to the deepest parts of her, the parts untouched and willing.

Ryujin gets that - she wonders, half out of it and stroking faster than she usually would be, how much of it has anything to do with who the voice is on the other end of the receiver, and how it could be what a desperate, pathetic, tired part of her has always wanted.

"Are you?" she asks, panting over the phone.

"Am I what?" you whisper back to her.

"Are you," and you hear how she inhales sharply through her nose, a desperate gasp leaving her lips on the exhale, "going to, um. Are you touching yourself right now?"

Your reply is immediate, and her eyes flutter and close the second you tell her exactly what she wants to hear:

"God, yes."

She drags her hand up the center of her body, runs her fingertips over her jaw and presses the heel of her wrist to her neck to feel her pulse slamming hard.

"I'm fucking throbbing, Ryujin; you sound gorgeous like this, like nothing I've ever heard, I'm stroking my cock just picturing you, please-"

"Tell me." She's mouthing into the center of her palm, saying the words, tasting salt and musk. "Fuck, ah," she babbles, "tell me what you would do with me."

"I'd get you on your knees," you tell her without hesitating for a beat.

"Fuck."

"I'd come up behind you and tell you not to be scared, baby. I wouldn't hurt you, I'd just touch you real gentle. Push my fingers past your tongue, slide a little down your throat."

"Uh huh," she moans, her head falling back and rolling, rocking against the mattress.

"Want you sucking on my fingers. Need your hands around my cock, or better, my balls, play with them. You're going to take those fingers - every finger I got, all five, yeah?- all ten of them," you joke, "and open up your tight cunt - like you are now, like such a good fucking girl-"

The girl fucking yelps. Just this honest sound of depravity; it's what she's paying you for. It's a silly line of bullshit, but it makes her bite hard and ache a little around her own knuckles and moan in her palm and dig her nails hard into her flesh. Her thumb fumbles across the top edge of her underwear and you pant again into her ear as if on cue, giving her a small bit of guidance that has her jolting in pleasure. She didn't know that was there, fuck, fuck-

"Like that, Ryujin. Breathe," and she does.

"Please," she whines, trying to find somewhere for her arm to settle, resting finally in her hair - setting the phone to speaker in a foolish moment of lapsed-judgment, just before it nearly clatters off the side of her bed.

Keep going - she's telling you over and over - keep going, and you’re picturing her there: eyes closed, legs spread wide, bent knees quivering and toes curling into the sheets. It doesn’t sound fake - you've heard a million of them, you've learned them in their different tones and accents and you can spot a faker a mile away. And the girl on the phone right now isn't pretending or thinking about whatever's happening somewhere else.

(You don't join in for everyone. You can't. It's an asinine consideration that you'd be rubbing your fist up and down your cock while it's sore and wanting - aching from the neglect or lack of rhythm. You have to remind yourself it's just a job, that the logistics just can't support such selflessness.

But then there's the very fucking premise.

That the girl on the other end of the line is inches from the goalposts, fingering her cunt and sighing into the throes of her first orgasm - first ever, because you did this, you brought her this far - you're the fucking culprit, and no matter how many girls, or boys-pretending-to-be-girls, how many people have gotten off with the help of your voice, your instruction, this one sets a different fucking precedent.

You're not lying when you say, "I'm rock fucking hard, Ryujin," or "there's precum all over my knuckles, baby."

Because there is, and the poor thing chokes out another desperate sound when you tell her.)

"I'm right there, ah, fuck, keep going-"

"I've got my hand around my shaft, just enough that I can fuck it, can't I? The head is getting slick - baby - and my palm is gliding nice and easy. Are you cumming, Ryujin? You better be, you better be cumming right now."

There's a heaving gasp and she calls out for you, babbling curses and "please" and "fuck" in alternating succession, with enough punctuation for you to have to let your lip slip under the hard bite of your front teeth. "Don't stop," she tells you, voice thready.

"You need this so bad."

"Yes," she gasps. "How would you-"

"How would I fuck you?" you finish her thought.

She waits a moment, sucking in shallow breaths and then replying weakly, "I really like... I like doggy."

"On your knees?"

"Yeah," she stammers, "I like when, like- ah, like, pulling my hair."

"Fuck, I love that," you say into her mewling. "Splayed out with your tits against a pillow and getting your pretty, little pussy pounded? I bet that'd feel so good, huh? Hands so rough on your hips, on your throat, squeezing your neck so you'll turn pink. Just to see you smile, I'd probably fucking let you take whatever you want."

You're met with a broken moan, a long string of syllables ending on a note that has your shoulders clenching and cock jumping in your grip.

Tense over the things you can't see: Ryujin biting down into the side of her hand, the other knocking painfully against the wooden side rail on her mattress, her thighs tightening and screaming and clamping around her wrist as she pulls weaker, wilder whimpers out of her chest each time her fingers drag across her slit and the sensitive curve of her swollen clit. She's dying, she thinks, she's going to fucking die - the in and out of her soaked pussy, through all that sticky, satiny skin, slick fingers diving in, twisting until there's nowhere for them to go.

No other recourse than to fuck in, fuck, fuck, like that, fucking god.

There's heavy silence on the line for god knows how long - well, you have to check the log. But for her, it feels like fucking forever. That was - that was it. It's so fucking mind-wracking how good it was, she can't quite wrap her brain around it. Nowhere near. She thinks she'll have a better idea after two rounds, definitely by four. She'll buy something, use the discount, go shopping - an orgasm just to make sure she's not bullshitting herself.

You clear your throat.

She moves sluggishly, away from the side and against the headboard - the heat still unbearably oppressive, her t-shirt clinging and sticking. "That," she stumbles through the afterglow.

"Do I need to apologize to you?" you ask lightly.

"What? Oh god, no - no way. No way. I just."

"Yes?"

"Like I didn't know it was this-"

"Did you just cum, Ryujin?"

She's laying there with the phone pressed to her brow. A hand palmed over her own racing pulse. The faint smell of her own cunt lingering around her face.

"I don't know," she tells you, and promptly hangs up.

-

The darkness in Ryujin's bedroom is punctuated only by the faint, hazy light streaming in from the hall, and her bedroom fan making its creaking little circles, as she waits in her post-nut-high for her breathing to normalize. Her mind is buzzing, and out of all this, she has a hell of a bill and a couple conclusions:

She's a coward and a pervert, but definitely, definitely bisexual.

Or, like. She's in some weird gray area between not liking whenever anyone buys her drinks, but also the girls at least let her dance a little close. That's a strange thing, isn't it? For how often her mouth does stupid shit - you think at least someone would figure it out for her.

But you, oh fuck. You-

She's fucking shaken up, for sure.

-

(It's a home office set-up, actually.

Your desk isn't organized; you're sure the photos on the wall are askew and the paint looks slightly worse for wear if you were to turn the lights on - which you never really do. There's an aging lamp tucked into the back corner, a bottle of scotch next to your handset that's closer to halfway empty than halfway full, and you can't stop imagining it.

Promise, This never happens.

You've got the name stuck to the roof of your mouth even though you know it's fake. Stuck with something so painfully abstract. Imagining this girl that is probably as brash and bawdy as her voice, or more exciting than either - maybe her hair is long enough to brush along her breasts. Or maybe it hangs just over her shoulders. God knows just how that would frame her features.

You can see it, really. You pump a handful of coconut oil into your palm and the details solidify so easily in your head: her pretty mouth, nose, the dimples in her cheeks - eyes glazed and sultry and gazing at you.

Smelling sweet, all the places you need, skin hot, clit swollen-

Just- fuck. Fuck.

Ryujin, huh, imagine that.

Ryujin.

And you jerk off right into the soft embrace of a tissue.)

-

A little more than a week later:

Ryujin's all wrapped up on the couch, with an arm cushioning her head and watching TV when there's a sudden commotion from the front door. Yuna - her friend, her very nice, very male friend who never shows up after midnight unless there's a promise of sex - comes bumbling into the room.

He has no regard for boundaries.

So,

Yuna starts to say, smug, from where the hallway becomes the living room, "Ryujin - look at us. Stuck on a Friday night. You gotta boyfriend or something?"

She's completely unfazed by this interaction. She's pretty sure he has his own key, so like, he should be used to it by now too.

"Kind of." She shuts off the TV to turn her attention towards the topic at hand. "Why?"

Yuna runs a hand through all her long, silky hair and gestures her cock-du-jour on over to the door of her room. "Waiting for a call, maybe." She waggles her eyebrows. "Are you any good, I mean, you never seem to..."

Annoying brat. 

Ryujin smacks the back of her neck and interrupts, "you gonna fuck him? Go ahead and fuck him, Yuna." She checks the lock. The kitchen. Gets up and tries to ignore the heat flaring behind her ears.

"We could pretend," Yuna muses, tugging the waistband of Ryujin's shorts around her fingers before she's out of arm's reach. The elastic flips back into her waist with a dull snap.

"Dumb idea. That's a dumb, dumb idea," she reasons, because she knows Yuna has no self control. None, and it's showing; the second her shoulders sag forward and her eyes dart, craving, Ryujin steps back in. "Don't be stupid."

Yuna's lips are tilted, playful. Ryujin wants to smack that look right off her face. Like she fucking deserves any kind of victory just because she found out she can fuck anyone she wants while lacking the self-awareness to somehow be contented with anyone. She's not going to call her a slut - out of a matter of principle - but god, does she fucking want to.

"Gotta get ready, is what you should do," Ryujin mumbles under her breath.

"Fine." Yuna shrugs and pecks an annoying kiss to Ryujin's temple on her way to the shower, waving a hand over her head with a casual, "If you want something, you've only got a half-hour."

Ryujin pushes her hair out of her face and does what she does best: overanalyze and overthink the situation.

Whatever. Yuna won't give it up regardless, not in any way she'd actually be able to enjoy. Her cheeks go a little redder while she pretends to not be considering it.

God, a threesome in total functional harmony however: her working her mouth on Yeji (Ryujin doesn't know why she's thinking about Yeji, but she is), Yeji working her mouth on her boyfriend, her boyfriend working his mouth on her -

That'd be something, she thinks. Like one of those Escher diagrams, but one where everyone cums at the end.

The thought makes Ryujin wet enough to squeeze her thighs together and stand up a little straighter.

Then she hears the showerhead turn on, and she wonders just why, exactly, Yuna is such a spoiled asshole.

-

Turns out,

The universe just has this habit of providing Ryujin with what she wants right alongside everything she doesn't.

She’s stretched out in her sweats, sat up at the top of her bed again and touching herself beneath the sheet in a pointless attempt to contain the mess. Fucking horny - it's honestly unbelievable - and her left hand's making lecherous, slick noises until it's absolutely gross. Until Ryujin's gasping and panting and sweating from the nape of her neck and the back of her knees.

All because Yuna's the loudest little-fucking-whore of a roommate anyone has ever heard.

She's moaning like she's getting fucking plowed into the next life. And apparently, the cock she's got in her cunt is fucking huge if those little murmuring whimpers are anything to go on. She keeps begging the guy, coy, for a kiss while she's probably folded up like a lawn chair in there, getting railed, and the fact that the boy keeps obliging is as admirable as it is kind of insulting.

"Goddamn," she thinks out loud, because the walls are paper-fucking-thin. The apartments in the area are built in an earthquake-safe way, which in reality, means they can either withstand a magnitude 6.0 and come out without any severe structural damages - or that it's so cheaply constructed the building will go down like a matchbox house before it stands a chance against a tremor of any significance.

They're easier to replace that way she’s told. And Ryujin's apartment is definitely of the latter; she can hear everything.

The skin on skin, their bodies sliding together in the slippery sheets. Her mouth smacking wet around his tongue as he bucks forward and asks her to do a hundred filthy things, asking her where it feels best - that sort of thing, which gets her wound and agitated and frustrated, and fucking horny as fuck. Ryujin's bent-inward and panting when he really gets to work - the creaks and groans, their mingled pants and the constant thudding and swaying of the headboard smacking into the wall.

She doesn't even need to put her ear to the partition like she's sixteen years old all over again, hoping to catch her old brother going at it while her mom was out. Trying to figure out this whole sex thing - what all the fuss was about.

Just the way Ryujin sighs is nothing short of despondent. Slightly pitiful.

And every tight circle she's running over clit feels so fucking good, until she realizes the room goes real quiet for a bit. The stillness - no slapping, no movement, just wet, panted-breaths and muffled speech. She nearly asks aloud what's wrong - but she hears it: Yuna's hushed but totally undeniable,

"Been so long- don't, don't- hold up," she croons in these high, sing-song little huffs. "That - uhn, ah - that's my - that's my good spot, there, keep - yes, harder!"

Ryujin slams her eyes closed, dropping down onto the mattress and wishing she'd slipped her hands into her sweats sooner. Fuck. And as Yuna's back starts banging against the wall - so rhythmic and fucking thorough - Ryujin can feel the heat curling behind the backs of her knees, radiating along her calf and reaching into the smalls of her feet. Fuck. Fuck, she doesn't even get to watch.

Right there. So good, please, so fucking good, is what Ryujin can’t not hear coming right through the drywall.

She’s three knuckles deep in her pussy, all stretched out, and she's practically drooling - "spread me, baby. Hold the, fuck, spread my lips open. See me- unh. Ah - see me? Please, do it-" - the boy groaning about it as he fucks her, and then, Yuna, needling him with a quiet, breathy, "harder, can't you?"

The answer seems to make Yuna squirm and scream.

And Ryujin's nearly rolling - rocking, fucking humping her own fingers because it's starting to ache a little, a cramping in her wrist and arm and jaw that she's trying really hard to ignore, rubbing and fingering and fucking herself closer, the heels of her feet sinking hard against the sheets, throbbing and aching around the flicks of her knuckles, harder, faster - faster -

"Fucking hell-" she seethes and stops moving all at once - because god, Yuna is un-fucking-believable.

The absolute bitch, she's doing it again: squealing and cursing and calling his name into her orgasm and just basking, it sounds like, right in it. Because she always does this, every single fucking time, she acts like it's the best feeling in the fucking world and she fucking loves everything, and that shit just - Ryujin grits her teeth and grimaces and pulls her slick fingers from her body - that just ruins it.

All that build-up and for what?

Fuck, Yuna really has the nerve to go there too. She's talking about sucking her own damn cunt or some bullshit-

Yeah, it's not fucking fair, Ryujin concedes.

Or maybe she's being punished. She could live with that, but god. The unfairness of it all. She tries, for a half a minute, to let her throbbing stop being a goddamn nuisance. But the noises coming from the other room are making her crankier, more angry, more irate - and definitely hornier than she ever really intended, even though she knows Yuna is thoroughly distracted in there.

Ryujin sits up a little straighter. Squares her shoulders, steadies herself and fishes around in her pockets with her uncoordinated, cum-coated hands until she finds her wallet, a credit card, her cell -

And there's an aching, a sore pulse of neglect between her legs; that's all too much. A quick peek down confirms that, yep, she's practically dripped right out of her shorts and even gotten a dark spot in the front of them. How great is that.

Yuna is over there, all, "thank you - ah - can you please do me a favor and fuck my mouth with your big, big, huge, fucking cock-" and this guy, he sounds so patient, telling her how he wants to do exactly that, but he wants to fill her tiny pussy up first, fuck her here, fuck her there, fuck a baby right into her. Wants to get his cum all over her face, smear her mouth and her throat and her cheeks - 

Ryujin inhales through her nose and holds, eyes falling closed in something between misery and anguish.

He's telling her, yeah, of course he'll fill up her throat - give her so much it's leaking out of her fucking nose - and Yuna sounds like she's moaning and garbling an objection to that last part - but it doesn't actually fucking matter.

"Geez," is Ryujin's quiet, little gasped-out response. He just fucking pounds her right back into place; her next orgasm. Fuck-

And there it is: the slew of moans that start back up and just keep on keeping on.

Shin Ryujin is going to lose her fucking mind.

-

Ryujin only lasts a handful more days before she calls again.

It’s another Wednesday night, if only to increase the odds that you’re working. Yeah, she could go with another guy, but another guy might not do everything you did, talking quietly and calmly - so composed while Ryujin was losing some part of her sanity to the thumb she pressed on her clit. 

No, it has to be you.

That's what Ryujin makes herself say when the operator apologizes and explains you're busy.

"Will he be working much longer? Please, I, um-"

"If you give me your number," the operator tells her, "I can add him as a preferred associate. You'll get him next time instead of going to the line."

Ryujin pauses, finger held to her chin. Will he know that? There's all this implication isn't there, that maybe he won't. Maybe you're popular - are you? It's a lot like texting someone for the very first time. And if you did - know, she means - would she be acting like a stalker? It would feel weird, probably, but no worse than some people do it already.

Oh god, this is kind of fucked up.

Maybe a little. Maybe.

Ryujin pauses, finger to her chin. Will he know that? There's all this implication, isn't there, or maybe he won't. Maybe you're popular - are you? It's a lot like texting someone you like-like for the very first time. And if you did - know, she means - would she be acting like a stalker? It would feel weird, probably, but no worse than some of things other people are undoubtedly doing with this service, Ryujin decides, and rattles off the digits so fast the operator asks for clarification.

"If your schedule doesn't open," the line says, "call back and leave a message with when."

Ryujin shrugs and says, "yeah, okay."

-

You make Ryujin sit through forty-five-fucking minutes of on-hold music - this barely audible synthetic noise that signals a connection is still there, truly a genre for no one - all before she just cuts the fucking line and lays down on the couch.

Okay.

Okay, fine.

Whatever.

-

(You are… going through the motions.

Some girl on the other line is barely holding it together; you can hear her thighs making slick noises. God. She sounds desperate, she's holding the phone all tight and saying your name. She's fucking babbling; it's not attractive, not while you're tilted back as far as your office chair will go and staring up in the ceiling.

You're bored, mostly.

"Please, please, I'm-"

"Going to cum, I know, princess." She asked you to call her that. "Mouth all open? Can't help it? Just need to lick it nice and fast?"

The answer comes all choppy: "I can't, ah, a-ah-nymore, no, I, can't, need-"

"Do you have any idea? How hard I'm fucking stroking my cock right now? Sitting right in my lap. Jerking it right for you," you say, and then she makes an embarrassingly wet noise, gasping through a choked whine, "so I'm ready to give you what you really fucking need."

"Yes," she chokes. "There - um, please, I just-"

"The biggest fucking load," you tell her. She has no idea, really, that you've got one hand on the receiver, the other just pinching the bridge of your nose - neither of which are you jerking the cum out of your cock and balls like a fucking hydrant as you’d described. What she doesn't know won't hurt her, and you keep your face turned to the side as she starts screaming. As it starts running into one noise that lasts forever - so unbearable that, this time, you consider going out to the bathroom to grab a glass of water and a handful of painkillers. "Need it deep. Let me pour it in, yeah?"

"Yes," she gasps again, heard on this distant frequency because, yes, yes, you've plugged your ear with a finger.

"That'll satisfy you. C'mon, now, princess - give it right up," you tell her, but your eyes are a little dull when her moan turns out all-gagging and twitchy and spasming through it, until finally:

"Ugh."

You wait a moment for the gasping and hitching to finish.

"Good girl," is your distant reply, followed by a polite, perfunctory, "call back anytime.")

-

Ryujin feels like she's in grade eleven again as she stares at her phone. Boys. Drama. Girls. The drama.

The overanalyzing, the wondering, the hesitating. Fuck. She wishes she knew a way to change this, because she doesn't feel particularly mature and is somehow reduced to this girl, this idiot sitting here all embarrassed and staring and moping about a thousand different calamities at once.

She's looking right at the lock screen: the wallpaper of her and Yeji and Chaeryeong out getting coffee on a random Sunday, all bundled up. Winter. Like three, four years ago, maybe.

Ryujin looks like shit, it's funny.

But Yeji -

How she can make the winter pallor look good is beyond Ryujin's understanding. It's unfair. All the things are. Her brain is back and forth and spinning, spinning like the hands on the old clock hung up on the wall in the kitchen. So stuck on what's not quite normal. Stuck on what doesn't fucking matter - who even fucking cares who the fuck she's attracted to?

She feels it between her legs.

Has been for like a month, or longer, without an outlet. Without anything to give her the hint that maybe she can get back to it - the right it.

She doesn't need to call, she tells herself. She's not some weirdo who's sitting on this for days just in the hopes that her boyfriend is having a bad week with work or whatever. It's only Wednesday, technically. Still way early. Just another few days, she reasons, another few hours - what does it matter?

Wednesday. She can feel the word settle inside of her.

Though only once her bottom lip is chewed to hell, does she pick up her phone and decide she will.

-

(You're in your bedroom this time around, finishing up your own weekday workout - on the bike, fifteen-second sprints - when your phone goes off. A simple dinging. Very unassuming.

The operator comes in with a cool, level, "line two, callback."

Then there's nothing but silence for a few beats.

You towel some of the sweat off your face. It's warm - your skin, flushed. Bouncing your phone in your palm. The same feeling that's been tugging at your throat for the past two weeks starts to flare and swell.

Not quite a hope, not quite expectation: just something close.

"Are they still there?"

The operator confirms. "Shall I put them through?")

-

Ryujin fumbles in her own rush of bravado, hands pressing against the fronts of her thighs in an unflattering, nervous little gesture as the connection clicks and picks up.

"This is him," comes your voice, a little husky and raspy from all the day-to-day talk, but even and easygoing and maybe - just maybe - something she can hang on to. Ryujin gives an acknowledging "Mmmn," like the phone call isn't causing her major inner-turmoil.

"Right, ah." You sound kind of, dare she say, nervous yourself. You clear your throat into the line and ask, "what brings you here, stranger?"

Ryujin pauses at this; the red in her ears reaches her fucking jaw. Stranger. Jesus christ, okay, okay-

She laughs. Stops immediately at how self-conscious she sounds. Clears her throat and tucks some of her hair back - settles herself into it like her life hangs in the balance. "I'm here to get my rocks off."

"It's not usually my place to say," you begin in earnest, "but if you're anything like me, and this is gonna sound completely off-the-cusp, but those two weeks really seem to build up, don't they?"

God.

She pulls her sock off her ankle. There's eczema on her heel, and it's the kind of thing she can imagine Yeji telling her to not scratch - that she's going to fuck up her skin. It's funny the stupid fucking things she can remember and all the things she forgets. Like just now, with your voice in her ear, a little unsure in a way that says you've got other, much more important things you should be doing. But you're here with her.

With Ryujin.

God. She might hate herself a little.

"Um," is how she finds her bearings. "Actually."

"It's a joke. Not that- I mean." She hears some rustling - assumes it's coming through the ear piece. There's an abrupt slamming on her side of the line and it seems like the worst kind of deja-fucking-vu. Her neighbors. She forgets it's even this late into the evening. That other people don't have to work so hard in their free-time.

"Maybe this isn't a good night," she says, not so much as thinking the words.

"What?" you ask. Then it dawns on you. "No, no. If you're there, I'm here." You clear your throat. "Besides, there's nobody I'd rather hear from than a woman so desperate she's signed onto my frequent flier's club."

She stops chewing the insides of her cheeks long enough to give you a tired, irritated sound. "Whatever."

And you nearly choke trying not to laugh.

"I don't, um-"

"What, do I have a nice voice?" You laugh quietly.

Under normal circumstances, that wry edge, the bit of try-hard-humor would have her rolling her fucking eyes clean out of their sockets. So when instead she opens her mouth and a fatal-fucked-flirty-feminine, stop, comes out, the vowel pulled long like a plea or a request - well, Ryujin's forehead drops against her bedspread in immediate regret.

You seem startled by it too, going quiet for a second.

"I-I'm-"

"Cute," you decide.

Her ears are red-hot and her cheeks have to be pinking and god, she hates this. That she's hearing this so soon, and it's making her brain hazy and soft and stuttering through, um's and yeah, well, um's. A part of her can't believe she's paying for this, and then, at the same time, she can't believe she's not actually putting cash down for more right this second.

Because it feels -

Like maybe -

Her shoulders rise. She wants this to be quick; she hates this feeling of embarrassment creeping its way in and grabbing onto her with both hands, like this weird, pseudo-affection. She's a grown fucking woman and here she is, letting all her guard down for someone she doesn't even fucking know.

You can feel the tension, hear it. Your lips purse. You try for something easy.

"Go on and give me the details, Ryujin."

Before you'd even picked up, she'd already half-undone her shirt, the flaps of the collar hanging loose with her hands gently petting her ribcage - so easily giving and pliant that there's a good portion of her, in spite of the doubt, in spite of what seems completely illogical about all this, that has her realizing maybe she wants this more than she can possibly understand.

God, she feels like a fucking fool.

"It's pretty boring."

"Not to me. I've spent the last few weeks talking to a bunch of assholes who don't appreciate what they got in the first place," you reply. She imagines you're a little playful about it. Wonders, momentarily, how good that smirk looks - if your eyebrows are lifting like you've been teasing her since day one. Fuck. 

“Your operator is a total asshole too, by the way."

"Don't say that," is Ryujin's shy reply, practically moaned out. "You sound like someone I'd absolutely fucking hate, jesus, stop that."

"Just because you don't get on with someone, doesn't mean they can't get you off."

"Smooth, or something."

"I'm taking a break, relaxing a little, enjoying an overrated TV show or whatever this is - not really minding my business," you say, but your smile is so audible it's fucking offensive. And she's - she's maybe, definitely into that. Like the fucking embarrassment in this is turning her on. Ryujin puts the tip of her finger in the waist of her shorts, experimentally, gently, this small brush and press to her sensitive lower stomach. And it's true. All she hears is her own breathing in the receiver, a bit labored over the slightest, least indecent touch. It's amazing, how much her body can want even when her head can't seem to catch up.

"What do you like?" she asks. “You’re a person, working bits and all, something’s gotta get you all worked up and flustered, no?”

"Will you believe me if I tell you this is my absolute favorite?"

"Do you always dodge the question?"

"It's just like a courtesy," you clarify, "it's not personal."

"Now I sound like a desperate pervert."

"On the contrary," is your warm, buttery reply, and it is fucking aggravating just how well this works on her. "I think there are much better things people can say about you."

God, that - the thought, the possibility of something about her that has nothing to do with how 'thick' or 'thin' her thighs are, or the silhouette of her ass in safety shorts, or how her voice makes guys want to ask if they can take her home and fuck the answers from her, or any of that; it's kind of liberating, just a tiny bit. That it can be a good thing for some reason. God.

Ryujin rubs herself. "Yeah, well."

She wants it all the same and says nothing, shifting a little until her hips tilt slightly upwards, letting her pull at the drawstring of her shorts, loosening the grip. She's already kind of feeling woozy in all the best ways, soft and feminine in how she slides her hand underneath her shorts. Over panties first, with no clear idea if you can tell and honestly, too distracted to wonder about that, if she should care or not, too caught up with her fingertips over the raised seam in her underwear - where the fabric's wet from her.

A shush comes into the line when Ryujin swallows.

The ache between her legs grows louder.

"You still there, Ryujin?"

"Of course," and then, she finds a little more reassured finality: "fuck, yeah, fuck. Please, I..."

"Ryujin," you say with all the calm and control in the world, "talk to me."

-

(So - truthfully, honestly, factually - you are a total wreck.

You're sitting there in a heap of bedsheets and a cold sweat when Ryujin finally mutters into the silence, "thanks, for that, I, uh- that felt really good, exactly what I needed," and hangs up before you can ask about her day or comment on the weather or suggest calling back tomorrow.

She is just perfect, the way she lets a small "I..." slip when she's close. Perfect, how she groans her little broken, satisfied sigh of a yes, her last, fleeting exhale just a sweet, high, barely there please, her body tensing with every little shudder and moan and pant. How the pace goes fast and then slow - like she's gotta think it out a second, her own fingers bringing her closer and closer until there's nothing but a flurry of movement and ragged breaths - an enthusiastic little mmph noise - followed by Ryujin's wet and slick little laugh that sounds like relief.

Like you did something to help, like she needed you and wanted you.

There's cum sticking all up your torso and along your wrist, the inside of your thigh - everywhere you could manage, frankly - and, shit, it's not fair, you realize:

She can find you, whenever she needs you.

And you -

You're just sitting here. Nowhere near sure she'll even call again.)

-

There's a sizable difference between being lonely and being alone, Ryujin thinks, running the cloth under the stream of the shower and then pressing it damp against her throat, wiping at the backs of her knees.

Lonely means that something's missing - it's something she feels when she catches a glance at the handsome arm reached around Chaeryeong's waist, the way she dances so close to someone she just met, or whenever she tells her that she's thinking about, maybe, probably, definitely, absolutely going home with him if her friends don't stop her from leaving. God, her smile is always so cute when he's near. When someone's calling her over for drinks - hips sashaying like she doesn't know the whole bar is staring at the creases where her thighs flare into her ass - because he gave her a look from across the room, and she's swaying from drink to drink.

Like, of course, they're fucking; it's a known, unsaid thing.

She knows it, he knows it. Chaeryeong fucking owns it.

Alone however, is just what it says on the tin.

That's something else Ryujin has yet to learn - that everyone loves differently, cares for different things. Yuna is still single after all, and she can never shake the feeling that it's simply to spite her for some perceived slight or another; Yuna can't live without company, no matter how brief or short or meaningless, so perhaps it's better she never catches on or finds anyone worth keeping around.

And Yeji?

Ryujin sighs, rakes the comb through her wet hair.

The showerhead is running hot between Ryujin's fingers, and the water coming off of her skin turns to steam instantly, filling the bathroom with a permanent cloud, stuck in flux - rising towards the ceiling. She passes her fingers under it, watches the flow, a quiet hm escaping the back of her throat - and she considers the way it feels beating against her throat and chest.

Down the concave curve of her stomach. How it burns red right over her thighs. The pressure slips and sinks low, lower - and when she puts a palm out for a little stability, her left leg can't help but buckle just so, lifting itself out and off to the side. So she stands, toes pointing against the shower floor, face first into her arm against the cool tile.

Ryujin sees where the rivulets of water have gathered above her clavicle - feels them trail down over the tightness in her breasts and between. A couple images pass through her mind at once - thoughts of fingers trailing a line back up the center of her body and a gentle tap against her chin, turning her face to some perfect all-consuming kiss - a hand squeezing at her calf, rubbing her muscles gently - Yeji smiling into the crook of her neck, the grasp on her hip, wrist flexing. Her back bowed and fingers, broad and experienced -

"Don't need you," Ryujin quietly says to nobody, which -

You're doing so well, Ryujin hears back in her imagination, you're so beautiful, you can keep this up, I know you can. I bet it feels good, doesn't it? Just let go and I'll...

Ryujin whimpers out. She can feel that line deep inside her going taut, buckling in her core, the reverberations down to her wrists and fingertips and toes. If she didn't have the wall in front of her, she knows she'd be on her knees - kneeling to the hot water pulsing around the knots of nerves right behind her clit. The pressure hitting her like the crack of a whip.

"Fuck me," she says to no one, gasping in that way you only can when no one is listening.

Yeji's smile is what's gotten her this close so many times, the smell of the ends of her hair tickling Ryujin's nose. Hell, she can't stop thinking about the way her nose crinkles or her dimples flare just when she finds Ryujin's name in her mouth.

It's not fair.

She's so close to cumming and letting whatever happens happen. The slick of her release pouring right out into the drain of the shower, washed away with the excess. So when her whole hand shifts and catches in just the right, delicious, frustrating way, Ryujin inhales so deep through the end of the sentence that, as a result, her knees wobble.

She feels like fucking crying.

It's that sweet little lilt in Yeji's voice, saying things like: "It's alright. I promise you can keep this up a little longer." And "Oh, god, baby." And, at worst, the way her voice shakes with a "come here, honey. Let me-"

Ryujin has to catch herself when her footing slips a little from under her. Then, your voice, coming in distant at first, grows louder, clearer. Into something catastrophic, right against her throat, like it knows the very inside-and-out of her, "go on. Fuck, please, cum all over me, baby - show me a face no one else gets to see."

And for the first time,

Ryujin gets herself off. Alone.

She moans and sighs out. Gasps, "there you go-" and whispers an, "ah, jesus." She manages the most silent, the least decipherable, fuck, as it leaves her mouth like a prayer. Her left knee twitches, body curling into itself, and her hand moves - fingers closing and her eyes clenched shut, a wave, cresting - she just-

Collapses.

Wanting: Yeji, sure - and she came - but the only thing she can really wrap her head around is the truth that she's so, utterly fucked.

-

"Are you sure there's no one you can bring?" Yeji asks in the middle of slapping the ever-loving shit out of a coffee maker that has, for as far as anyone can remember, never worked.

"Uh," is Ryujin's inconvenienced reaction, the tips of her fingers idly sorting through her credit card statements, which a more-sober, less-horny version of herself is a little out of sorts over. "I'm not sure there's anyone I'd want to bring."

"Uh huh," Yeji replies.

She pauses and rests the bottom edge of the coffee maker on the edge of the kitchen counter, stopping herself mid-smack - leaning away to try and give the stupid thing a once-over.

"Who the hell says it's got to be someone you wanna make babies with? Maybe it's just someone you'd think would look good beside you, smiling at the cameras with. Or."

"Or."

Yeji's lips tilt. "Or someone you wouldn't mind screwing in the bathroom."

Ryujin spins the pen in her fingers and gives Yeji a look that says back off and can you chill out already, in the sort of way it takes years to ferment - the silent understandings, the good-natured naggings, the good-fucking-luck-with-that-buddy's. Yeji knows she's getting on Ryujin's nerves. Knows that has never stopped her before.

"In my defense," Yeji clarifies, "I can count at least a hundred people that would crawl over broken glass to sleep with you and, uh-" She knocks the coffee maker off of its stand and holds it gingerly to her chest like some child, motherly. "-I don't wanna take a bullet for your unintentional chastity, Shin Ryujin."

"First of all, don’t pretend you’re doing me a favor here," she replies. "Second-"

"Can't hurt just asking, right? I could set you up, you know, someone you've never even met - no pre-burnt bridges to maneuver."

There’s a world, and Ryujin imagines it for all of a second, where she stands up and grabs hold of Yeji by her cute little ponytail - if nothing else, just to stop the way it bounces every time she steps - and maybe, she also kisses her on the mouth so hard she stumbles. Or perhaps she could pull that ribbon free of its holdings and unravel it down against Yeji's jaw. Pull a whimper, a tiny little ah that says this was inevitable. Maybe they crash onto her bed. Maybe she gets her fingers sticky with how soaked through the cotton of Yeji's shorts have gotten in those short, heated moments - what a world that would be.

"One of what's-his-name's friends? I’m assuming."

Yeji looks annoyed and proud and beautiful; all at once.

"Yes, and what's-his-name's pillow talk is exceedingly whiny about how my best friend is so incredibly standoffish and abrasive and-"

"Okay. I'll go." Anything to stop the image of Yeji with the comforter pulled up to her tits and hair splayed all over the place; red and flushed. Her lips curling with the curve of the sheets and god -

"Just for an hour?" Ryujin asks.

Yeji finally places the coffee maker back onto its stand.

"I mean, nothing much happens an hour into a birthday party," Yeji reassures. "It'll be fun."

"Uh-huh."

"Trust me."

Ryujin wonders just how far Yeji could go - if she knows that she can snap her fingers together, and Ryujin will be there: ready to do anything.

-

Ryujin is trying to go to sleep, is how she'll explain it if anyone asks. Though she prays to god no one ever will.

She tries books. And she tries scrolling aimlessly through Instagram. And there's this one guy she kinda-sorta-dated's updates: photos of a vacation to Boracay, which seems nice; his chest is a little more defined, more chiseled than when she was seventeen and kind of fumbling her way around a college boy and his stupid fucking preoccupation with who should be paying for drinks at whatever run down establishment was his pick of the night. Ryujin makes a face at the screen, pursing her lips; there's a girl in the photo - she looks too young for how her ass is falling out the one-piece. To the extent that she makes sure to send an unsolicited meme she's tagged herself in - like "here is my past and here are his balls", and gets a block and a report as a thank you.

It makes her feel good. That's what's most important.

And then, with little other distraction and a decent lack of luck, she picks up the phone.

It rings for a while before the operator comes in and says, "You're at number nine."

"What?"

"The queue. This call has you at number nine."

Ryujin slowly leans up from the pillows and squints into her bedroom.

"Huh."

"Would you still like to be connected, miss?

Ryujin thinks it over for a moment. Of course you're popular, a part of her mind comments, because you've got a voice like gravel-slung honey-gold. She's imagining eight other girls just like her, laying in their bed, panties on their ankles and thumbs covered with spit. All desperate for you. All curled up - one right after the other - with no fucking idea.

"Miss," the operator comes back with.

The line goes quiet - a few beats, but not too uncomfortable a silence. Then she gets a soft little exhale out, saying, "can I leave a callback number?"

"If you like." The operator considers the idea. "I can’t promise whether he’ll call you.”

“No, yeah.” Ryujin curls an arm under her chest and plays a finger against the swell of her breast through her night shirt. Gets lost in her own consideration. “Don't think he would anyway."

-

A new day is defined by new possibilities, or something or another you read once stitched into a frame; Something you muse over the rim of your coffee, nose-deep in the laptop at the kitchen counter top.

Last night ended a bit unexpectedly - this not considering the couple's awkward fight which took up two-thirds of the evening. Or the girlfriend-slash-fiancée of that guy, which somehow led you to wonder just how old was too old. But as you were logging your final client session of the night a ping came through the employee portal and let you know that someone had left their number with the operator in the hopes you'd call.

You swig back the rest of your coffee, roll your shoulders and shrug. Oh, there are at least a million reasons not to call a number that randomly, offhandedly arrives in the middle of the night and gets patched through a phonesex hot line under the cover of darkness.

The same number could be out there, defacing the wall of a truck stop bathroom, or inked into the skin of a squat prison convict who's got a brow like the horizon. Maybe, it belongs to that married business man that took your personal phone number as his private line and spent all the time bragging how he was going to quit his wife and make a run for it with you - just you - even though you'd rather stab him with a fork than be involved with that kind of psychopathy and are honestly just looking for that extra bump in commissions every time his wife calls to ask the exact same thing.

Your clients call. You talk.

You take the cash.

The point is: there's more fucking deviants out there than there are stars in the sky. You would know; you talk to a new handful every goddamn day.

Yet it doesn't really matter. You're gonna do it. Because you're feeling restless. Because - and it sounds insane - there's at least some probability, no matter how remote, that you will pick up that receiver and punch in a number and the line will connect with the girl who's been on your mind almost constantly for the better half of two months. That you might listen to the dial tone turn into her answering with a genuinely indifferent, "this is Ryujin," or whatever her name actually is -

You're living in a pipe dream. You're probably reaching, actually. And all you know about this woman, is, what? What does it really, factually, truly amount to, the amount you feel you've come to know about her.

You know more about how she prefers to methodically, meticulously begin, then draw out, and finally end a blowjob to someone that ain't you than you do about any detail in her life story, frankly. You're reaching, and you know it.

You pick up the phone and dial.

-

(It goes straight to voicemail, and get this: that’s her real fucking name.)

-

Yuna has the audacity to ask, as she slides into the booth, "who do you keep texting?"

Ryujin's eyebrow arches.

The younger girl nods towards where Ryujin's thumbs are practically flying over the keyboard.

"No one." Ryujin puts the phone on her lap and crosses her arms over her chest. Then the words seem to echo through the inside of her skull, so she shakes her head a little, in emphasis. "It's nothing, don't worry about it."

She's right though - and maybe that's the problem. Maybe that's why it's hard to answer.

Chaeryeong washes the shot of whisky down with a swallow of lemon-lime. Her eyes slide open to Ryujin as she wipes at her bottom lip. Then she spikes a finger into Ryujin's ribs.

"Spill."

It's a dangerous order, and she doesn't realize it at first. Chaeryeong's bad ideas have an annoying habit of flinging themselves on Ryujin, like a bomb dropped at low altitude - sudden, quick, and more than enough to shake everything up. Chaeryeong will make Ryujin go out dancing - and then she'll lose her clutch purse. Chaeryeong will remember she started the evening with a scarf - so they need to walk out a whole block or two to find it.

More importantly: Chaeryeong is not a great drunk.

So, of course she spills. She relays her findings, carefully and as deliberately as she can muster.

"Does he have a nice voice?" Chaeryeong asks.

"It's kind of deep?”

Chaeryeong snorts. Apologizes immediately.

"Not... deep. Sultry. I guess. Smooth, easy to hear." Ryujin tells the two across the table.

Yuna whistles low. "Romantic as shit."

“Fuck, I don’t know. In, like a sexy sort of way." Ryujin raises both palms in a vague gesture. She clears her throat at the two pairs of eyes staring back at her as though the words coming out of her mouth belonged to a foreign language. "Uh. Sort of raspy, or something, sometimes, like he's... on the phone a lot, and you know," Ryujin flushes, suddenly caught and wondering where all the confidence went, "yeah."

Yuna's leaning forward, chin in her palm. "I'm having a hard time believing texting is a sort of standard operating procedure."

"Well try a little harder," Ryujin snaps, eyes finding Yuna's and making herself fucking clear.

Chaeryeong has this look about her, she's trying to keep it all in, but then there's her eyes, cinched at the corners and dead-fucking-giveaways. She puts an arm against the table and points at Ryujin with an up-reaching thumb. "This is the cutest shit, like ever, and you two are texting like actual lovers instead of two, apparently rando-stranger fuck buddies, or whatever."

Yuna - for whatever reason - feels at liberty to throw gasoline on the fire. "Does that mean you think he's going to get jealous if you bring some dude along to Lia's birthday?"

Ryujin sucks in a breath; the fact that he'd never - well.

"Ryujin's in love," Yuna adds for dramatic effect, for the sake of being the worst fucking person. She can be so fucking petty. It's a side of her no one ever sees, because she's just so sweet all the time. Like right now, she's doing that smile-smirk thing that gets Chaeryeong giggling against her hand and then coughing into it a second later.

"Jesus christ," Ryujin starts gathering her jacket and purse. "He's- not- this is- God, I'm done." She slips her shoulder under the strap. "Thanks for listening to me sound like a teenager."

"Isn't that just normal for you," Yuna quips back, pulling at her straw until there's only air rushing through the bend of it. "Where are you going?"

"I can't stay here," Ryujin says as if it's obvious, as well as her point, the argument she's trying to make. "Besides, Yeji is gonna want me to get my dress and shit all sorted out."

"Don't fall in love with one of the robot voices at the cross-walk on your way home, or anything!" Yuna laughs out, giving a flippant wave goodbye.

Ryujin lets her eyes roll because sometimes, she hates her friends.

-

It still throws you for a loop whenever Ryujin pings your phone with a text that says something like:

have you jerked yourself off to exhaustion or is there one more in you for someone like me?

Or,

my roommate is getting pounded through the springs of her mattress, wanna see if you can hear it?

Or,

are you free? I really fucking need to cum. bad.

Each text is something you tuck into yourself. Save and mark and spend all your time in those long-form responses imagining how her face looked when her brain typed out the words for you. You wonder if she's sighing through her fingers or hiding her lips behind a pillow while the heat coils in the pits of her hips.

As time goes by, Ryujin slips a little more. From one text about whatever book or series she was rereading last and another about the sadism of politicians and how people are more likely to agree with what they've heard someone else say than the facts of a given subject, to texts with a few scattered thoughts to strings of sexting that has you cumming into the palm of your hand and through your sheets and in the middle of a dream in which there's no clothes and a pretty fucking filthy proposition.

"How have you been lately," you decide, and consider, briefly, the very strong likelihood this call is gonna send her right through the goddamn roof.

When Ryujin eventually finds herself able to get out: "fine," there's a tell-tale pause, then an even longer pause, that implies she'd definitely rather say anything else. Then she kind of stutters a, "pretty good. Not too bad. All that stuff, I suppose."

And not to say any part of this has felt like routine. Both of you breathing into the end of a telephone and letting your eyes clench tight while you cum all over yourself - imagining everything she told you she wanted you to do to her, how it'd all go: "fucking with my arms grappled behind my back," she'd hum, "head pushed into the bedsheets, you're smothering me, ah- I'd let you cum wherever the fuck you like, but please-" or maybe a bit simpler: "so my thighs are straddling your face?" is about the gist.

A second goes by, another, a third.

"Hang on," you end up having to tell her sometimes, "I need a fucking towel-"

"You really are, huh, jerking off with me- I get you that hot, is what you're telling me? Or is just too much imagining how you'd fuck your way right into my guts through my pretty little pussy? Ah, jesus," the cadence of her voice climbs high before ending up back where it belongs, "Jesus, fuck."

"Can you imagine," is how it'd start, "how good it'd feel? My pussy, or- anywhere, everywhere. I think you'd ruin me for anyone else - you- with how, god-"

You can hear Ryujin shift on the sheets, licking at her bottom lip. Silently cumming. Cumming for you.

"Okay."

"Okay what," Ryujin quietly says back.

The gears turning.

You press your hand into the side of your neck. "Fuck me. Now, in a second. Tell me the last fucking thing in the world you want me to be or do and-"

"Wait."

There's this half-breath. This hmm that almost trips off Ryujin's tongue. Her eyes squinting open to a new thought. You think she's about to be sly. About to surprise you with an offhand fuck yes I'd ride that face like a bus seat; that she might come back with, yes I'll put you right in the middle of the best part of me, god you'll love it, and I promise not to make you cum if you're nice enough not to let your hands wander. But.

It's funny how things are -

"I have a confession," she says, matter-of-factly.

That's not entirely unusual. You've had more of those come through your line in a year than a confessional grate might get in a lifetime. So it doesn't sound like something special to you; Ryujin and you are in this candid don't-ask-don't-tell in regards to payments and the exchange of goods and services, but here you are, still using lines and bits. Practiced.

"In the name of the father, and of the son, and-"

"Funny." Ryujin gets the hint to backtrack. "Uhm, I mean. Remember the roommate I was telling you about?"

You hum a, "maybe."

"Uh," and now the hushed voice from her throat sounds distant, suddenly out of the scope of the receiver, "can I be totally, honestly- just really, extremely honest here, are you- or?"

You stop thinking about the ebbs and flows of her voice, how it dips down then arches up a little. Because now her voice has become something that is nervous, bordering on uneasy. So you stop, take stock and hold on. You weren't expecting a voice of worry or tension, or not at least while she wasn't thrown back into her bed and rubbing furiously at the ache between her legs.

"Yeah, of course," you offer her up.

"This is so embarrassing," she's saying, and some part of you feels ready to sink - you haven't the faintest idea for what, but there is something. Your chest clenches.

You can't help the worry and reply: "Okay, um. I mean- yeah. Me too, I can admit I feel a bit- and you can, y'know, be a little-"

"I'm not straight," she says finally, with a little quiver of her voice right at the tail end.

A blink comes, another - there's nothing coming out of you and you have no idea why that should be at all difficult, so the silence grows long. A new sort of awkward; the kind that you find out isn't just the rush of cum cooling in a pair of sweat-damp underwear. No - this is embarrassment, the kind that taints you.

"What?" You exhale a strained laugh, almost too-bright. "Are you- is this some sort of-?"

"Nope, no, this is crazy, sorry." She laughs. "Sorry."

"You certainly had me fooled." You sit up straighter in your bed, resting elbows on your knees. The moon is filtering through the windowsill and bathing the room in blue - casting light all the wrong ways. Making your own heart beat just a little too fast. "Fuck, um. Can I ask a personal question?"

"Sure." Her voice sounds uncharacteristically soft.

"What are you into?" and you as soon as you ask, you're laughing - because you've heard Ryujin wax lyrical for weeks, pontificate about every manner and way she'd take a cock between her hands, lips, fingers. Every. Single. Place, she wants one in - and now you can't believe this is what you went with: "I mean, like girls?"

"It's probably safe to assume I have some, y'know- degree of- yeah."

You chuckle a bit. The stiffness in your shoulders settling out.

"I've been in love, I realize - boy, with my roommate - for a while."

It's said with a sad laugh - as if this were a little shameful. Some deep, dark secret no one could ever be privy to; some stain on her soul that might wash out only after one final scrubbing with dish detergent and the cruelest bristles. A thing that keeps her up at night -

“Not the roommate, by the way, who we listen to get fucking railed like she’s on-demand pornography every weekend. Just to be clear."

"Good, jesus, that'd be fucking something."

Ryujin sounds more cheerful when her voice comes back through the line, "right?"

You wipe the perspiration of your top lip. You laugh nervously at this girl admitting to being in love over the phone - a stranger, truly, in all ways - to some fucked up audio-fetish sex line personality. And now - the fuck's wrong with you?

"Are you mad?" she asks, and some part of you is wrung. A small string of tension twisting so hard inside your gut, you're losing touch.

"No," you let her know. "No, not at all."

And that is honest. This is honest. There's this itching little scratch all over the insides of your skin that seems intent on driving a fucking wedge. Right at the center of your chest, tearing you apart. It feels as you've lost - not an object, not a material. Not an idea, nor a concept - but a feeling, that for once, was distinctly, overwhelmingly yours, without your wanting, or permission, or comprehension.

Ryujin sighs, this elongated relief coming in. She sinks back against the headboard.

She tells you everything. How Yeji smiles, and it's like the whole fucking room has gone up in lights, just from her and her alone. How there is nothing that she'd rather spend all her days around. She talks and you sit there, silent and listening. She talks about her. Her name and everything Yeji does and everything she wants.

The more you listen, you realize it's all real; she's not confused, or mistaken, or out to play a game or convince herself of something she believes is inherently untrue. She's not frustrated, or longing. She doesn't have this stomach-rolling pit of anxiety digging a cavern at her center because she just can't go through the rest of her life, living a life like everyone else. Not ever.

Because, all you really notice is-

She loves Yeji. The quiet kind. And she's sitting there, legs curled under her ass, crying. Not sad, or frightened, or wounded, just this beautiful sort of awed: it's the kind that only someone who is too inexperienced at crying should have. Where you just-

Look away.

"I'm not taking my phone into the bath with me," is the last thing she says to you, tears flooding out in her last couple words, before you can only offer her a meek: "anytime, Ryujin, I'm here."

-

(Four, five weeks go by in the blink of an eye. A month where you figure it's best to let her text or call or make it clear she wants your voice.

She never does.)

-

Lia is taking her sweet time to apply concealer over the cut Ryujin earned herself trying to get a stupid thing off a shelf - that's how low and unreasonable her tolerance for anything mildly inconvenient is.

"That fucking hurts," Ryujin tells her, wincing.

Lia ignores her.

She keeps on dabbing at the spot on her temple with the makeup brush until there isn't any trace of bruising, or where the jagged scar of a cut ends and skin begins, not anymore. At this point, she has gotten better, has developed a kind of surgeon's eye: zeroing in and unblinking, until every inch of damage is looking like Ryujin did when she was brought into this world -

(which is not perfect, but what it ought to look like, all things considered.)

Lia holds her hands in place on either side of Ryujin's head. "Stay."

It takes less than five minutes, and during those, Yuna just offers from around the bathroom door, "Ryujin, sweetheart, you’re looking hot tonight."

There's nothing more Ryujin wants to do than set the girl straight - the girl can't not keep a chirp to herself, for once in her fucking life. Because this flimsy slip of a dress around her middle feels too tight, the air choked out of her lungs if she shifts her weight onto the wrong foot. The hem rides way too fucking high up her thighs. So, if anyone didn't want a good long look at her ass tonight, they better come up with a plan B if she has to so much as approach a staircase.

"Have I ever not," she bites.

Yuna snorts.

And luckily for Ryujin, Lia feels the same way:

"Yuna, would it kill you to find something productive to do with your time?"

Yuna opens her mouth like she has something to say (she usually does) before retreating further away, the edge of her hair disappearing around the doorway. Then Ryujin's grinning - eyes taking in how Lia glowers a bit back, silently judging the stupidity in Ryujin's expression and also, admiring how good the girl looks. "Not bad, though, really."

Lia tells her with an underhanded wave of the brush and a wink: "historically, you do always get laid on my birthday, remember?"

Ryujin jerks a little, and the scar above her eye throbs into Lia's thumb. "Thanks?"

-

The party is miserable, but it's not Lia's fault. It's not really Yeji's fault either. They tried, that's really all she can say for them - her and her permanent-plus-one whose face Ryujin wants to both claw at and kiss until it’s swollen-

What she really can't wrap her mind around, though, is the guy sitting right fucking beside her. The idiot.

"Really, I'm telling you," her date - who is about 3.5 out of five stars at best and not so much handsome or hot as he is 'okay in a pinch' - grins up at her with the smarmiest of smiles, "if you'd just have taken me up on dinner, I would've spent all our time talking about you. We’d figure out how to enjoy ourselves."

"Likely story."

This fuckwad has the absolute goddamn gall to look wounded when his arm starts circling its way around the space where her dress is suffocating her at the waist, and Ryujin starts to shimmy her way out of hot water - again. God, she thinks, god save me-

"I think," she manages with a stilted grin, "I'm going to make myself useful- drinks, no?"

When he leans forward to grab her hand, it's only so she doesn't leave.

"You're not going to ask for my order?" he presses. The only reason Ryujin hasn't knocked out a couple of his front teeth is because Lia would be the one hearing Yeji whine about cleaning up the fucking mess.

"Just scotch. Neat."

Ryujin's a natural when it comes to smiling fake; it's part of her goddamned job. "Of course," she says, like she's not absolutely loathing him.

"Try the oakier, single-barrel variety, alright," he explains, because what's hotter than a man who's an expert in alcohol and being an insufferable tool? Nothing of course. She hopes he knocks back a few too many and his liver explodes - the painless way out. If god would ever fucking allow it.

She barely manages a half-strangled laugh over the blare of the music before he finally releases her wrist. 

The absolute fucking prick.

-

Here's something Ryujin never thought she'd come to appreciate:

Being alone.

It's just her and the breeze through the open doors of the rooftop garden, which is something every bit as refreshing as it is teeth-chatteringly cold. The wind picks up in gusts and billows, until it starts nipping up the fabric around her knees, like it's any one of the drunk, stumbling guests milling about and looking for a noncommittal lay.

Her left foot slips a step outwards, the uncomfortably tall heel bouncing on the edge of her toe and tapping a tune against the brick. Ryujin slouches on the railing that encapsulates the entire terrace, arms pressed over it, hands folded one-over the other - letting the night sky caress her bare shoulders with its wind-brushed kisses. This, is okay. It's better.

Maybe not ideal, but better.

And all it really took was a few fucking moments where she isn't smiling with pursed, stressed lips; where the pressure in her jaw finally settles out enough for the knot in the back of her teeth to fall loose and for her mouth to actually feel, y'know - good.

Not forced, is what. Not fake, or not real, or whatever-

Ryujin almost fishes her phone from her clutch. Almost. Almost texts to tell you that: this fucking night, like all the others in the past month or two or year, has left her feeling particularly done for, and yeah, no, it isn't helping that she'd take whatever would be the alternative if it meant a face like yours came in handy to lean against, or your shoulder or thigh to use. Like some pillow - that's all.

And you are, like. An option. But not, she sighs out, exactly the right one.

An errant chill shudders through her and down her spine.

"Shin Ryujin."

She'd recognize the tilt of that voice anywhere; even if her ears were pounding and her head filled with static and noise, she'd be able to place Yeji at the end of the world. The truth is easy to see, if only Yeji knew where to look: the corners of Ryujin's eyes screw up tight for a second, an immeasurably long time, in order to not do what they wanted. What it would mean.

She does anyway. "I'd hug you," Ryujin throws behind her with an airy sigh, "but I know where you've been."

Yeji's jaw has set at this point; a twist is still in her lip and she lets out this dry, half-laugh, half-not sound - which is the thing that drives Ryujin a little crazy. Yeji turns her attention from the concrete ground, to Ryujin's profile, her body leaning forward, toes tipping in: "sometimes I wonder if my partner in crime can breathe without saying something incendiary."

"Nope." Ryujin offers no further response or follow-up. Instead, the quiet gush of air makes itself the center of attention and a victim of silence.

"Sorry about-"

"Don't be. Don't give it a second thought." Ryujin stretches, leaning a little over the railing. Her fingers arch before her. Her words sounding the slightest bit cold, "can't win 'em all, right?"

Yeji's eyebrows pull together. "That's not how this was supposed-"

"God, Yeji." Ryujin smiles. Yeji hates that she never knows what that means. "I'm trying, really, I am, but you know - I really, I have tried my best, so can we just lay it to rest?"

Yeji leans over the railing - the fucking moon reflecting in these lustrous pools where her eyes go darker than night - and doesn't say anything for the longest moment. Ryujin chews her tongue, and tries to look as interested in the void of stars and night clouds as possible.

"Fuck's going on with you, lately?"

Ryujin just laughs back.

"Really," and the last word dips in a groan. It's almost childishly tragic how petulantly she insists, "talk to me."

But Ryujin has nothing else to say - no witty, scathing remarks. No deadpan observations or funny asides, not even a morose comment to throw back. There are times and moments and fucking periods of her day where she'd happily chew glass if it meant that Yeji would sit there a second longer, be beside her for a while and smile, just smile at only her, once - for once.

Her only response is the worst kind of lie, this soft: "really nothing."

The moment where it slips and hangs between them, when it lingers the longest -

She could reach out, a hand on her thigh, the small of her back, if she could only reach. And Yeji, she'd listen to her, for once. She'd really, genuinely hear what Ryujin says; like she can see it, plain as day, everything there's in Ryujin's eyes, the thoughts inside her head, written on her goddamn face and across the open night air in neon:

I love you. I'm in love with you, you're too close to me.

The seconds pass. They tick, they stretch and grow thin. Yeji looks at Ryujin expectantly, and Ryujin knows. It is something like being put on the spot and called in. Something like a long, pained whimper caught somewhere in her throat.

She is very much still, unmoving, and feeling nothing at all.

Maybe she can blame the alcohol, the dark, the series of events that saw her hiding away behind a bunch of decorative trees and fighting for breath where the wind blows a little cooler. She can pretend like the stars aren't absent above her, and it doesn't hurt a goddamn bit.

“Yeji, I-” She licks at her lip, ready, willing-

Ryujin grabs at her waist with a hand. Her knuckles white around the black of the railing. And with no further fanfare, she spits it out like venom, with no small measure of shame or guilt or worry for how Yeji will take it - or worse: how she herself would react in the wake of admitting it aloud -

“I love you,” Ryujin says, and it pops out of her mouth as neatly as it had the first thousand times practicing alone in her car.

A blink, and another. The look on Yeji's face is hard and blank, as if she'd understood every syllable, but didn't hear it at all - maybe. Her gaze drops, it trails a path along the long line of Ryujin's pale neck. Of the two ways it could ever go in her head, stuck on loop for as long as she can remember, Ryujin had never considered that Yeji might turn this still and vacant. A sudden feeling, a pull or a grip, starts in the lowest part of Ryujin's guts.

"And not-," she hears her own voice falter, "like-"

Then - it's on the back of Ryujin's head and in her hair, a hand curled at the base of her skull and pulling her head a little downward and her, until their foreheads meet. And before she has a chance to walk it back - to stuff it down where it came from and seal the bottle tight - before she can clench her eyes, shake her head, and spit out anything else like the fact that there was not much that had to change, between them -

Yeji just says plainly: "Yeah, hun. Love you too."

And it's shockingly, the most painful thing - that she just squeezes her hand and pats her back like it's all they could ever be. Without even the wherewithal to reject her properly; to tell her something like "don't ever say that again, god," or "oh shit- Ryujin. Sorry. So, no," or at least to spit back with a scathing laugh: "welcome to the fucking party," like what she always does.

"Yeah." Yeji clears her throat quietly and starts retreating back from the brink - with no apparent aim but to pull away as she draws herself away from the warmth of Ryujin's space, "uh, don't forget to say hello to some of the staffers before they go home, okay?"

Ryujin is left with nothing but the air that follows Yeji's outline; left with her heart sinking into the depths of the night; left trying to make sense of the bitter sting ripping her chest in two.

Left with her own hopelessness - the pining - when Yeji walks away.

To be lonely, to be alone; neither are the same. 

And she hates knowing she is so incredibly both.

-

The worst part is she knows how it looks.

Her pace just on the verge of unsteady, the way her feet come up from the ground: Left foot, the right. The other. Back and back and forth again, faster and then slower and- fuck.

A damsel, severely distressed.

She sits down on the curb. She wants to cry, but even just the way she looks, carrying her heels and struggling with this fucking dress she wishes she'd never bothered with at all - oh, the tabloids would be sure every detail gets pinned under all the wrong lights. A breakdown would only serve to confirm all the right things; it would paint a story for anyone who cares enough to glean from her crestfallen posture and red cheeks that she is yes, a little broken, and that everyone wants to be loved and she's no different - and -

She sucks a breath. This time, when her tears fall, it's a quick, perfunctory action, no show in it.

Her palms rub her face - and she wipes, and wipes, and wipes - smearing at the foundation under her eyes before she takes a long drag of night air. Deep from her core, filling up her lungs until she can't hold anymore. Until it hurts and stings the backs of her ribs - it's enough for a single, fleeting moment. The street is mostly empty; an occasional car will speed by every now and then and it's those few and far between intervals that hurt most, that nearly shatter her: if she can barely do this, alone, how can she possibly be enough for anyone?

Ryujin’s smiling only to hold back her tears, and it fucking stings. She flicks hurriedly past the lock screen of her phone and swipes through the message stream with blurry eyes - there’s a whole host of people that want to know where the fuck she went, if she's safe, why she up and vanished the moment Yeji couldn't keep an eye on her. And well. The girl sighs.

Finds your name in her contacts and puts her thumb right beside it.

It rings exactly three times, and she hates the number. She hates how many things can be associated with that number in those seconds alone.

Four, the pause where you must have had the opportunity, but didn't decide to pick up - just leave it be. Then five - Ryujin is definitely no longer looking forward to any of this.

Six: it stops.

There's this crackle, and through the night -

"Just what brings you here, stranger?"

For an indistinct amount of time, Ryujin drifts in the whirlpool current of that question; it sinks her deeper, into the currents of your voice and the tone and what it's suggesting and demanding from her. All the things your voice is giving her permission to ask of and with and-

Until finally she answers back: "do you ever just, like, wish," a shallow pause for the hitch in her breath, "something, someone was a little more for you- or to- with you-"

The swell of a smile through the receiver; and you can't help your laugh, soft.

"Sometimes," is what you say, "that's just human, don't you think?"

She doesn't understand how something like love or life or desire should be a universal trait.

"Uh, maybe," she shrugs out, and thinks.

"It's pretty normal," you tell her.

Quiet, as if you were right in front of her.

"Look," you start, and you can hear how she sniffs her nose and swipes the pad of her hand right along the side of it, to catch anything stupid and stupid sounding leaking down to her upper lip. "You don't have to. Let's just hang out. Tell me anything."

And for once, she does.

She talks.

-

(The whole story.

From the first time Ryujin realizes the world is never going to be fair - that she shouldn't have to look at herself like she's unlovable because she's seen her friends be held as though they are - or at Yeji like she's completely unattainable or somehow, unlovable, and that someone as amazing as Yeji should have been loved from the moment she was born.

The rest comes through as fragments: the truth of her career. Yeji.

The balcony, the breeze, the bitter-fucking-disappointment.

And what came of that -

When Ryujin isn't a million and one words per minute, it feels, almost, it feels - she'd swear there was less noise in her own head: this thrumming in her brain has settled out; the walls around her and the echo coming off of them - the booming and pulsing - it's, gone.

Because even though there was an indistinct shape for where she had landed, in the aftermath, and nothing much had changed - all that did. You listen, and that alone makes it so you're both exactly where you’re supposed to be, even if this, tonight - you are unsure, if it will actually fix anything - if anything needs fixing at all.)

[yxngbxkkie]

showing your 🍒 during an argument (maknae line)

here's the maknae line! i feel like each one is a little all over the place, but i think it's still pretty cute 🫢 so, please enjoy! 🩷

Han Jisung

Jisung gives you the silent treatment the whole way home. You have a hard time understanding what he's so upset about. You thought the two of you were having a good time.

You watch him closely as the two of you walk through your apartment door. You cross your arms over your chest after slipping your heels off, gently setting them beside the door.

“Do you have any clue why I'm so upset?” He asks you, turning around to face you. Jisung combs his fingers through his hair, breathing heavily.

“I'm going to be honest, no,” you shake your head, tentatively stepping towards him.

Jisung rubs his face, releasing a quick sigh. He moves from where he's standing and sits down on the couch. “I overheard you talking to Yeji,” he mentions, hoping it'll refresh your memory. “It was right after I told you I was getting drinks. I had forgotten my wallet, so I went back to get it when you told her that you weren't happy.”

You frown. “Baby, I wasn't talking about you,” you reassure him, staying in your spot by the door.

He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “It sounded pretty convincing from my point of view,” Jisung mutters, keeping his eyes on his feet.

“I told Yeji that I wasn't happy about how her partner treated her,” you say to him, hoping he'll at least hear you out. “I promise you. Baby, I'm so happy with you, you have no idea!”

Your boyfriend lifts his head, eyeing you from his seat. You can tell he's having an internal battle with himself. You take a few steps closer to him, wanting to reach your hand out.

“You're a hundred percent sure?” He asks you, causing you to giggle softly.

“Of course, Hanji. I love you so much,” you smile. You bite your lip slightly, trying to think of a way that'll make him feel better.

You push your jacket off, letting the article of clothing drop to the floor. Jisung's eyes glance towards you, furrowing slightly as he attempts to figure out what's happening.

“Plus, would I willingly do this if I wasn't happy?” You ask while lifting your shirt.

Jisung's jaw drops, his hands clutching the edge of the couch. “I– Wow,” he mumbles, pushing himself up from his seat.

You smile widely as your cute boyfriend stumbles towards you. “Be careful, baby,” you giggle.

He catches himself and now stands in front of you. His hands rest on your waist, stroking his thumbs along your bare skin. “I love you so much, too,” Jisung whispers, keeping his eyes on your chest.

“Are you saying that to me or my breasts?” You laugh, caressing his cheek with your hand.

“You, silly,” Jisung laughs as well, trailing his fingers up your torso. Your breath hitches in your throat when his fingertip brushes your nipple. “I'm sorry for how I acted. I should've just talked to you.”

You shake your head, moving some hair out of his face. “It's okay, baby. Just know that I'd never be unhappy with you, okay? I love you,” you mutter to him, pressing a sweet kiss on his lips.

Lee Felix

You furrow your brows at the sound of your boyfriend screaming. You stop what you're doing and stand up from your spot on the couch.

Felix has been gaming with Seungmin and Jeongin for a few hours now. He comes out every once in a while, but it's been over an hour since you've seen him last.

You slowly walk towards his gaming room, gently knocking on the door before opening it. You peek your head inside, seeing Felix gripping his hair. “Baby, everything okay?” You ask, and he turns around to face you.

“I'm fine. Can you leave?” He mutters, shocking you a little.

“Uh, yeah, of course,” you stumble over your words, not expecting Felix to speak to you that way. “I ordered dinner. It should be here soon, okay?”

He grunts in response, waving a hand while swiveling around to face the computer screens.

A tiny sigh comes from your lips as you gently shut the door. You tuck some hair behind your ear, wondering if there's something you can do to cheer him up a smidge.

You walk into the kitchen, grabbing his favorite drink. You're not particularly fond of how angry he gets when he loses. Before you're able to deliver his drink, there's a knock at your door.

You set the drink down on the table, heading towards the front door. You open it to see the food you ordered, almost squealing in excitement.

“Thank you so much!” You say to the delivery guy, taking the bag from his hands.

After shutting the door, you bring the delivery to your kitchen table. You separate your food from Felix's before setting his drink into the bag. You grab the bag and make your way back to his game room.

“Baby, I got your food and a drink,” you say while walking into the room.

Felix is currently in the middle of a match, the sounds of his mouse and keyboard echoing off the walls.

He curses at his teammates under his breath as you set the food down. You watch him silently for a minute, not wanting to interrupt his match.

“Seungmin! I'm fucking dying over here. Can one of you help me?!” Felix almost screams, halting his game movements to slam his fist on the desk.

You jump a bit, not expecting him to get so loud. “Baby,” you try to warn him, not wanting to get any complaints from the neighbors.

Felix does it again when his character dies. “I'm dead. I'm fucking done,” he says into his headset before fligging it off his head.

His dark eyes meet yours, and you feel more nervous than you've ever felt with him. “I brought dinner and your favorite drink,” you mutter softly, pushing the bag towards him.

“I'm not in the mood. I'll eat it later,” Felix mentions, his eyes dancing from you to the bag of delivery.

“But, you haven't eaten all day,” you frown, knowing that he hasn't eaten a full meal once today. “It's almost nine, you need to eat.”

Felix closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Y/N, I said not now. I'm pissed off, and I don't need you babying me,” he almost snaps, glaring at you.

You shake your head and decide to do something bold. You lift your shirt, exposing your naked chest to him. You watch as his eyes shift to your chest, the anger in them dissipating.

“Shit,” he whispers to himself, reaching a hand out to touch them. Felix stands up from his chair as well, getting closer to you. “If this is a new way to get me to shut up, use it more.”

A giggle leaves your lips, and his eyes meet yours again. “They'll bring back the Felix I know,” you joke with him, bringing a hand to his face.

You bite your lip when his finger brushes your nipples. “Thank you for dinner, baby,” he mutters after placing a kiss on your lips. “I can have you for dessert, right?”

Your breath hitches in your throat as Felix wraps an arm around your waist. You rest your hands on his chest, gently gripping the shirt he's wearing. “Yeah, of course,” you whisper to him, kissing him once again.

Kim Seungmin

A hand wraps around your wrist before they tug you away from the person you're speaking with “Wait‐” you cut yourself off, realizing the person who dragged you away was Seungmin.

“You wait,” he mutters, hearing the annoyance in his voice.

He drags you towards the restrooms, shoving you into the girls' room. You stumble a bit and catch yourself on the sink. Seungmin locks the door before facing you, crossing his arms over his chest.

“What's wrong?” You ask him, reaching a hand out to him.

Seungmin evades your touch, and it breaks your heart a little. “You're supposed to be here with me,” he tells you, raising an eyebrow. “Yet, you've spent the past forty-five minutes talking to some dude.”

You frown, pressing your lips together for a second. “I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was that long,” you apologize, not wanting to argue in a nightclub's bathroom.

“Did you even try to leave? Do you want to be here with me?” Seungmin questions you, his hands dropping to his sides.

���Of course!” You say with no hesitation, taking a step forward. “I've been wanting to go out with you for years, Seungmin.”

He sighs, feeling the tips of his ears heating up. “You don't act like it, Y/N,” he says with a frown. “Maybe I should just bring you home.”

You shake your head, putting your hands on his chest. “No, wait! Seungmin–"

Your date pushes your hands away from you, moving to unlock the door. You run your hands through your hair and block his path again, staring up at him.

“Y/N,” he sighs, rubbing his face.

You lift your shirt, exposing your naked chest. Seungmin's eyes widen at the sudden action, his cheeks blushing and attempts to not look at you.

“Can I talk now?” You ask him, ducking a bit so you can look in his eyes. He swallows thickly, nodding his head. “I tried so hard to get out of talking to him. Believe me, okay? I wanted to get back to you and spend my time with you.”

He parts his lips, wanting to say something, but nothing comes out. His gaze dips to your chest, not believing that they're still out. “Uhm, I–” Seungmin pauses, wiping his hands on his jeans.

“Are they distracting you?” You ask in a whisper, chuckling softly. He nods his head while meeting your gaze.

You giggle some more, reaching forward to grab one of his hands. “If you are willing to stay and continue our date…” you trail off, placing his hand on one of your breasts. “Then you'll be able to do this more often.”

“You're cruel,” he mutters, shaking his head. He squeezes your breast, and you gently bite your lip. “But you're so pretty.”

It's your turn to blush, diverting your gaze away from him. “Thank you, Seungmin,” you whisper loud enough for him to hear. You fiddle with your fingers, looking back at him after a minute of silence. “Do you still want to take me home?”

“No, no, we can continue,” he tells you, squeezing you again. “Now, cover up. Those are mine.”

A gasp escapes your lips, not expecting him to say that to you. You lick your lips and lower your shirt down, covering yourself up. “Kim Seungmin, you dog,” you laugh, slapping his arm playfully before he leads you out of the bathroom.

Yang Jeongin

“Why did we leave the party?” You ask Jeongin, your voice slurring with intoxication.

He shifts his eyes to you, not saying anything before continuing to open the hotel room door. Your boyfriend drags you into the room and plants you down on the edge of the bed.

“It's pretty obvious why we left,” he says bluntly, toeing his dress shoes off.

You furrow your brows, trying to think, but your foggy brain comes up with nothing. “We were having a good time,” you point out, getting up to head to the mini fridge.

Jeongin stops you, his large hands gripping your arms. You stumble into him, resting your hands on his chest. “You were having a good time, Y/N,” he calls you by your name, causing your chest to clench a smidge.

“You told me I could,” you mutter.

“Yeah, one or two! I didn't expect you to get fucking drunk,” he huffs, sitting you back down. “You were embarrassing me.”

You scoff, shaking your head before crossing your arms. “I was hyping you up, Innie. I knew how nervous you were, so I tried to make it easier for you,” you confess to him.

“Baby, you told them about our sex lives,” Jeongin sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “They certainly didn't need to know about that.”

You giggle, covering your mouth with your hand. “Oops, sorry about that, baby,” you pout, looking up at him.

He's still glaring at you, but in your drunken haze, you can see his eyes starting to soften. “You don't look very sorry,” Jeongin mutters, grabbing water from the table.

“I love it when you get flushed just by looking at me,” you say while exposing your chest to him.

Jeongin choked on his water, covering his mouth with the back of his hand. He groans, tilting his head to the side. “Jesus, baby. You can't just do that,” he coughs a bit, his gaze settled on your breasts.

You smile at his reaction and stand up from your spot. Jeongin twists the cap, closing the bottle of water. “Why? When that is the reaction, I love to see so much!” You smirk, reducing the distance between you.

“You're cheating to win the argument,” he whines before chuckling, his hands touching your bare skin.

“Why argue when we could be doing something else?” You offer, standing on your toes to kiss him.

He wraps an arm around your waist, tugging your body closer to him. Your breasts are pressed against his pecs and your forehead against his.

“I'm truly sorry about tonight. My nerves and alcohol don't mix,” you whisper, pressing a light kiss on him.

“It's okay. I love you,” he mumbles, returning your kiss. Jeongin lays you on the bed as his lips trail down to your chest. “You looked scrumptious tonight.”

You run your fingers through his hair, smiling softly. “I love you, too.”

~

tagging: @strawboorybunny @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @moon0fthenight @foxinnie8 @like-a-diamondinthesky @prettymiye0n

[sjywrites]

༊*·˚ Prada & Versace

: ̗̀➛ 𝓢ugar 𝓓addy!𝓛ee 𝓗eeseung x 𝓕!reader. 𝓖enre smut, fluff, age gap, s2l. 𝓢ypnosis where reader is a broke and single college student celebrating her best friends birthday, and at said party she meets someone who might solve more than just one of her problems. 𝓦𝓒 estimated 5-10k. 𝓒𝓦 age gap, oral (f! and m! receiving), unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy!), pet names (good girl, baby, slut in an affectionate way!), mentions of alcohol, both hee and reader smokes, reader is a bit intoxicated but still fully aware of what she’s doing.

𝓝ote this is a sneak-peak of the actual story, this is the first story I’ve ever posted on tumblr so if you see anything that I can improve, please let me know. I want the first story I post to be good enough for me to be motivated to keep writing!

This is purely fiction and is not meant to interpret how the idols act in real life!

,, not proofread + english is not my first language ! ೃ⁀➷

Flashing lights, loud music and the smell of sweaty bodies. That’s what most clubs look like, and this one was no different.

It was Ryujins 19th birthday, and she wanted to celebrate it with just her closest friends and her girlfriend. That’s why Y/N agreed to it in the first place. She’s not used to social settings and spends most of her time stressing over finals, so being forced into a social setting wasn't making her any less stressed. Her and Ryujin are the complete opposite of each other and she can’t really remember how they became best friends, but somehow they did. And that’s why she’s in this position right now, pressed between strangers in a club that reeked of alcohol, dressed in a skimpy black dress that barely covered her up.

“Hey Y/N, get me another drink will ya’!” Ryujin shouted and laughed, fully intoxicated. “I don’t really think that’s a good idea Ryu” I said, a little worried about her condition “you’ve had a lot already” I tell her, hoping she would just give up “It’s fineee, I’m fineee, trust!” She laughed and grabbed another beer. I tried to stop her but she was too fast. I just gave up and sighed, trying to reason with her when she’s drunk is like trying to argue with a wall “You’re gonna throw up later I’ll tell you that.” I grabbed my lighter and walked outside for a smoke, leaving her to Yeji, her girlfriend. I love Ryujin, but sometimes she can be a handful to look after.

I walk out on the balcony, leaning against the rack and admire the glowing night sky, letting the cold wind run over my body. It’s a relaxing moment until I hear someone approaching and I assume it’s either Ryujin or Yeji, until they lean against the rack beside me. Build too big to be either of them, I look over in their direction. A tall, hot guy with glasses stands there. He lights a cigarette and looks over to me. I forgot how to breathe for a moment, embarrassed, I looked away slightly. When I look back to see if he’s still there, we make eye contact. He’s close enough that I can feel the heat roaming around him. And I can't tell if it’s the embarrassment or the close contact with the man that makes my cheeks heat up, but I’d rather not find out.

I take a look at the man in front of me, scanning him up and down. Dressed in a suit too fine to be worn at a basic club, hair styled in a way that makes it look almost untouched, and his eyes, his eyes were so easy to get lost in. I snap out of it when I realize I’d been staring for a while, a slight smirk on the man's lips as he leans down to my level.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer”

✩ ♬ ₊.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

A/N please let me know if you want me to finish it! Likes and reblogs are very much appreciated ♡ (Also someone please teach me how to make my posts aesthetic I've never posted on Tumblr before so I don't know how it works 😔)

[unhakzlvr]

but i like you! | leehan x female reader , childhood friends to lovers, college au

── warnings: kissing, cursing | wc: 2.07k

words from wam 🗯️ first written !

back to masterlist

“So what’s with you and Leehan?” Minji didn’t even give you a chance to rebut before adding on “You know everyone thinks you two are dating.” 

“Hello to you too Minji-” you sighed out before closing your phone to give your full attention to your friend “As I said, numerous times before- nothing is going on between us. We’re friends, I mean I knew the guy since I was 14, god forbid I have childhood friends..” 

“So you two are nothing?” Minji asks, still prodding curiously for an answer from you only to be met with a sigh and an annoyed nod for the millionth time

“Soo you wouldn’t mind setting me up with him?” she inquires which immediately makes you turn to face her eyes staring up at you like a desperate little puppy 

“If you wanted me to help you get with him you should’ve just started with that” you sigh out in a bit of a half chuckle. Taking a sip of your boba you glance over to see how she was still staring at you with those same pleading eyes, only to lead you to continue with “that’s a yes by the way.” which undoubtedly made her gleam on the spot 

“It’s just, you know you two are like always together and half the campus think you guys are a thing so I just was making sure-” rambling on Minji feels the need to defend herself for even asking to have you play as faux cupid for her, but is only met with a hand on her shoulder and a reassuring nod from you before saying “Minji seriously, it’s fine. I mean Donghyun doesn’t really have too much going on in his life so, he kinda needs this.” 

Minji wants to refute but instead is cut off by said conversation topic heading right your way

“Yah YN, give me back my hoodie, it's freezing in here!” Leehan shouts out despite being only a few feet away, leading you to strip off his hoodie from your body to throw it at his face before muttering “How can you be cold after practice, I can still see the sweat on your forehead.” 

Only garnering an eye roll from Leehan before biting back with “The court is always cold.” 

You were about to counter but then you remembered the task at hand, and matches weren’t going to be made themselves. “Hey Minji, do you want to come to lunch with us!” you ask before promptly turning around to be met with a very flustered face. 

“Oh you sure I won’t be intruding? It’s totally fine if I am, I really don’t mind-” 

“You’re not, trust.” you didn’t really give her nor Leehan time to answer before dragging the two of them to the dining hall making sure you subtly pushed Minji a bit to the side every so often so that her and Leehans hands could ‘coincidentally’ brush past each other. To your dismay, the dining hall seemed to be closer than you assumed, meaning you had moments to spare to find an excuse to dip. 

“Oh hey I just realised, I have a class project due like super soon and I promised yeji I would meet up with her to do it!” honestly you weren’t really buying your own lame excuse but that didn’t really matter as you rushed off immediately before calling out “You two have fun!” 

“You’re kidding” you couldn’t believe what you were hearing, I mean after your years of match making successes how was Kim Minji dropping this bomb on you right now “What do you mean it didn’t go well, I thought you guys started texting?” 

“We did! But that doesn’t change the fact that he already likes someone” Minji sighed out before scooping a handful of chips into her mouth. In all honesty she didn’t seem too phased by this whole thing, which was more of a reason for you to be worried. Because Minji, your boy crazy and insanely delusional friend Minji, didn’t bat an eye to her crush rejecting her. 

“Okay now why do I sound more upset than you are?” you pry, now being the one to shovel chips into your mouth

“Because,” Minji starts before promptly tying up the bag of chips and tossing it onto your nightstand “I could honestly see it coming from a mile away, I’m surprised you didn’t catch onto it.”

“No way, that dude’s a fucking liar. There is no plausible way Kim Donghyun likes someone and I don’t know about it”

“Well he’s not lying because he told me who it is, and to be honest it’s really obvious” she says with a smirk before wiping off calbee chip dust on her shorts and promptly packing away her things 

What? How could he tell Minji and not you? Aren’t you guys supposed to be best friends, what’s so secretive about it that he can tell Minji and not his friend of years? 

“Wait what? Who is it Minji? Please, I beg you. I mean the guy’s got like 7 friends. I'd probably guess it eventually so why don’t you just tell me now!” you follow her around the room like a puppy, begging for answers whilst she packs away her things not really giving you a second glance before responding with “Then I guess you’ve gotta keep guessing!”

“Minji please!” you cry out, watching her in hopelessness as she headed towards the door 

“I’ve got class.” she replies, before flashing a mischievous grin and opening the door to walk out. And as if on cue, like a trade off, she greets Leehan with a polite smile before patting him on the back before he headed in. 

“What was that all about?” he asked before plopping his bags down next to your bed and making himself comfortable on your couch

“You’re a fucking liar.”

“Oh good evening YN, it’s great to see you too! How was my day? Oh my day was great actually considering I absolutely aced my quiz. Donghyun one, physics zero-”

“Why did you lie to Minji” you cut in, now positioning yourself to face him with your arms crossed and eyes still squinting in annoyance 

“I have no clue what you’re talking about” Leehan doesn’t even bat an eye before reaching over to your nightstand before grabbing the chips Minji had previously tucked away and wrapped up shut

“Why did you lie and say that you like someone?” 

“It’s not a lie, because I do like someone” he replies, almost too nonchalantly which makes the words coming out of his mouth even more shocking 

“What? How come I never knew?” 

“Because, you don’t need to know? I wanna keep some things private” you almost can’t believe it when the words leave Leehan’s mouth. I mean you two told each other everything, you told him every one of your crushes, you couldn’t say it didn’t sting just a bit when he didn’t feel the same comfortability with you. 

“Come on I could totally fix you up with her if you just told me! Do you want to die single or something? I’ve got a clean track record for playing cupid, ask any one of my friends!” you suggest, raising your tone up one octave to try and mask the fact that you were actually pretty upset by this 

Still not sparing you a glance, Leehan only reaches into the bag of chips before quipping “Clean? Not so sure about that one…” 

“Okay well that’s your fault. If we discount your anomaly then it’s squeaky clean!” you bite back, now snatching the chips from his hand to scoop them into your mouth, which only garners a snarky glare from him.

Sighing back and adjusting himself on the couch he hesitates before finally mumbling out “Well it’s fine because she doesn’t like me anyways” his voice low and hushed, and his gaze still averted from yours 

“How do you know that, has she told you?”

“No it’s just,” Leehan pauses to finally glance up at you, but it’s only for a quick second before he drops his head down back to hands which were nervously picking at the loose threads on your couch “it’s just complicated okay?”

Complicated? How on earth could it be complicated? From your years of friendship you knew Leehan was quite the oddball at times but unlikeable? That’s far-fetched. In all honesty he was the furthest thing from it: he had good humor, was passionate in his interests, great company, a gentleman (to everyone but you), and you couldn’t deny that he was undoubtedly good looking. 

“What’s so complicated about it?” 

“She’s just-” sighing out Leehan leans back to rest his head on the wall before frustratingly running his hands through his hair “she’s her okay. She's loud, bubbly, outgoing- she’s got a personality. And I’m just Kim Donghyun, I don’t really stand a chance” 

“Trust me one moment with me and she won’t think that. I can set any girl up with you trust, unless it’s me of course” you joke, waiting for Leehan to chuckle in response

But he doesn’t. And this is where Kim Donghyun screws up. He hesitated for just a minute too long, averted his gaze far too much for your liking, and paused just long enough for you to realise who this whole conversation is about. 

Shit. 

Coming to this realisation you can’t help but immediately move yourself down to the couch so that you can stare him dead set in the eyes before muttering out “Yah, Kim Donghyun. You’re not serious are you…”

And instead Leehan doesn’t laugh, he doesn’t smile, he doesn’t crack a joke, he doesn’t even look at you. Oh so he’s serious. 

“This, this wasn’t how you were supposed to find out” he winces before finally sheepishly looking up at you; only to be met with your pupils slightly dilated, mouth agape, and a bright red hue flushing over your face. This is where Leehan screws up again. 

“Listen I know you don’t like me back, it’s fine…can we just forget about this ever happening and just move on?” he rushes to say, hoping that you could magically forget about this whole conversation happening and things could go back to the way they were, but to his surprise…

“Are you going to answer yourself for me or am I allowed to talk?”

“What?” there’s no way he’s hearing this 

“Well I don’t not like you.” you start, hoping Leehan could get the message from there to save yourself the embarrassment of having to explain yourself. But instead he just stares at you, a mirror image of how you were gazing at him earlier, except his eyes are much wider in shock, his mouth is absolutely hanging open, and his ears are burning a bright red. 

“I just- you know for years it was just always you denying that we were ever a thing. And like I’ll be honest, in highschool I had a huge crush on you so hearing that over and over again I just kinda accepted that it wasn’t gonna happen, regardless of if I wanted it or not you know? And going into college I was still trying to accept that it was never gonna happe-” 

“Why’d you set me up with Minji then?” Leehan cuts in to stop your rambling

“I guess, some stupid part of me thought it would be easier for me to get over you if you had someone already…does that make sense?” this time it’s your turn to avert his gaze. But instead of a reply you feel Leehan’s warm hands lacing between yours causing you to jolt up to face him, and the dopey grin on his face seemed to answer that question fully. 

“Is it weird if I ask to kiss you right now?”

“I think it would be weirder if you didn’t Donghyu-” but Leehan doesn’t let you finish that sentence before pressing his lips against yours. At first you’re too surprised to even reciprocate, but with his hands snaking around the nape of your neck to pull you in closer you immediately melt. As if your lips are drawn to him with a string you return the kiss, running your fingers through his hair as you get lost in this touch. 

Finally pulling away you can’t help but laugh before mumbling out “Guess my track record is pretty clean after all” 

[ryuttaeng]

omg omg please do mafia yeji as your girlfriend hcs !!

mafia!yeji as your gf hcs

my first thought was that she would probably have problems with expressing her emotions to you. on the other side, it helps her on her job, which is mob boss obv

you’re kinda not interested in all that crime stuff and actually don’t care abt it. you were oblivious of any gangs in your city, so you almost burst out laughing when some dude in front of you explained that you just bumped into mafia leader.

you looked behind him, taking a proper look of the person you bumped into, and, to your surprise, she was stunning… yet, you thought she was about to kill you, her gaze was so cold it almost made you shiver? 😭 anyway… the woman just showed away that guy and she apologised for not watching where she’s going. jokes aside, it made you feel guilty because you were obviously the one who bumped into her and you started apologising too.

she would not hesitate to get to know you, but she just has no clue how to do that properly 😭 she will ask her followers to watch you and will ask them to protect you eventually, as the time goes. well, you could tell that some people that just appear at the same place as yours is weird, and when you were about to yell for help, they reassured you that everything is fine and explained the situation to you. “why can’t she approach me herself then?” you ask, out of curiosity. “our boss is just very humble person.”

you convinced them to make an appointment with her, and when her people told her that she’ll have an appointment with you she lowkey freaked out 🤞🏻😭 she just stood there 🧍🏻‍♀️ for whole two minutes not even blinking, her followers even started to get nervous but their boss just started mumbling something to herself, mentioning your name 😭

on your appointment date mob boss herself wore a dress, which is quite rare sight to see! she finally tells you her name and since that day you start to get to know each other better.

mafia!yeji as your girlfriend would be such a gentlewoman it makes me pull out my hair tbh… she’s very attentive and cares about you so much, she’ll send her followers to protect you from weirdos and just her enemies every day you go to work, and when she has some stressful situations or days and she hears her follower say 'miss y/n is outside, waiting for you.' yeji becomes most happy person to ever exist. she just loves when you visit her during her working hours and you also make her food, making sure she ate today 😭😭

lots of presents, very expensive ones, it always makes you either gasp or cry. she’ll be like “why are you crying honey? is it bad-“ “no! yeji, darling, its just so expensive!” and she’ll assure you it’s not when we all know the truth 😭 yeji also cries when you make her some expensive or huge presents, she’s very careful w them, because she cherish them 😭🤞🏻🤞🏻 my cutie patootie

yeji will be overall just most sweetest, supportive and caring person ever in relationship with you, which quite surprises her followers ‘cause she always has that cold face expression when she’s on work. but she’ll often will have struggles with showing her emotions, but you surprisingly very patient w her at those times and yeji is very thankful to you for that 😭😭😭

[bgomtori]

☆ boyfriend - cyj

synopsis - he remembers it too well, he doesn't know how to act properly around you, even after being friends, he keeps thinking about it.

-> yeonjun x reader

-> songfic, strangers to friends to lovers, kissing, slow burn, college au, drunken confessions.

-> warnings! alcohol is involved, you and yeonjun just started college, i don't know much about college but.. please bare with me.. written in yeonjun's perspective!

-> notes! ahhh yeonjun's new ost had me giggling and kicking my feet 😭😭 his vocal range is so fascinating + some parts are inspired by seasons of lovesome!

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ call me back when you're sober

this was stupid, he regretted coming to this orientation programme made for the freshmen students. yeonjun stared into blank space, laughing at some joke one of the seniors cracked.

"aww come on! yeonjun, you barely had any of this soju. it's real good" one of the seniors slurred, grabbing onto the neck of the soju bottle, ready to tip some into the solo cup yeonjun was holding.

"haha, it's fine, i'm not that much of a drinker.." he chuckled nervously, shaking his head. his senior looked at him with a frown before singing happily to a song that was blasting in the speakers. yeonjun sighed, wanting to get out of the cramped k-bbq store and get some fresh air.

his phone suddenly started buzzing, causing him to take it out of his pocket, staring at the string of messages yeji sent.

yeji : come out of the store, i need help.

yeonjun : are you kidnapping me? freak..

yeji : shut the fuck up and come out.

yeonjun turned off his phone, slipping it into his picket before heading out of the store, running his hand through his hair.

"psst, here" at the sound of that, yeonjun almost shrieked.

"what the fuck?? why are you hiding in the alley—" his words were cut short when he noticed someone slouched beside yeji, completely drunk.

"this is yn, from the fine arts course, she was drinking a lot, so i decided to pull her here to prevent something worse from happening." yeji explained.

"then why am i here..?" yeonjun quirked an eyebrow, staring down at the two.

"so like, i gotta head out of here. my partner texted me, telling that we should leave together." she pointed to her phone, showing yeonjun her messages she had with her partner.

"alright. but you owe me one" yeonjun sighed, watching yeji jump up, giving him a thumbs up before leaving the alley. he turned down, looking at you stumble when yeji left, your only pillar of support had left. you turned up, staring at yeonjun through hazy eyes. you got up slowly with the aid of the wall. yeonjun was quick to grab your arm, helping you regain your balance.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ i'm afraid i might've never loved ya

maybe it was the alcohol in your system, maybe it was because there was an extremely attractive male standing infront of you, but your felt more bold, you didn't even know the guy. without a single thought, your arms were wrapped around yeonjun's neck, pulling him down to your level. his eyes widened, shocked and flustered, his heart racing. your messy hair and disshelved clothing made you more.. attractive in his eyes.

he was then met with a sudden kiss on his lips. usually he would push the person off, but it was weird, there was something about you that he was interested in. he pulled away quickly, holding onto your waist as he forced your arm over his shoulders, allowing you to put your entire body weight on him. this was stupid.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ when you fill my head full of a thousand thoughts

he didn't expect it. you were coincidentally in the same art history elective as him. since when was there a common class between the dance majors and the fine art majors? he looks around the lecture theatre, the only seat available was the one beside you. he quietly slide into the seat, nodding at you as a greeting. you copied the action.

it seemed like you couldn't recall the events that happened last night, but yeonjun clearly did. while you were focused on scribbling the notes down into your notebook, yeonjun was copying down the notes, with his head empty, only filled with thoughts from the night before.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ so why you looking at me like i'm your boyfriend, boyfriend

the class ended, yeonjun doesn't even know what the teacher talked about during the entire lecture. he glanced at you packing up your study materials. he mentally groaned at the fact that you can't seem to remember anything. he wants to know if you actually didn't know or if you are an expert at hiding your feelings. yeonjun carried his bag over his shoulder.

"yeonjun! can you teach me that one move you did in class?" a guy walked up to yeonjun, practically begging.

"yeah, sure." yeonjun nodded his head, about to head out of the lecture theatre until he came to a halt, "ah, hold on."

he noticed that you were still packing up your bags, shoving a notebook down into your bag. he knocked against the table, making you look up at him, startled.

"choi yeonjun, from the dance course. try to remember next time alright?" yeonjun smiled at you.

"oh, yn ln from fine arts.." you looked up at him, still confused at the current situation. yeonjun gave you a quick nod before walking away with his friends who were staring with shocked eyes. whispers immediately became more evident.

"i've never seen choi yeonjun flirt with anyone before."

"so he does have an interest in girls.."

"this guy has been hiding his power all along."

yeonjun scoffed at the murmuring, walking out of the lecture theatre. no one knew, not even you, only him.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ why you lookin' at me like i'm–

days slowly turned into weeks, you became friends with yeji, something you have been hoping for ever since she chugged your drink down at the freshman orientation party. yet the most unexpected thing happened, choi yeonjun.

ever since he introduced himself to you, you've been seeing him almost everywhere, in the hallways, in the secluded cafe at the college that barely anyone goes to, and even the library. of course he noticed this, he has been purposely sitting beside you, striking a conversation with you every now and then when you're studying.

"yn! you really like this cafe huh?" yeonjun laughed, sliding in the seat beside you.

"yea, no one really comes here so it gives me a better environment to study in." i nod my head, removing a side of my airpods from my ear. he hummed, taking out his own study materials too. the both of you studied in silence, whether it was comfortable or awkward, it was quiet. it was killing yeonjun, the way his heart raced, how he can smell the perfume you were wearing. he is in too deep.

"are you studying art history?" you suddenly asked, disrupting yeonjun's train of thought.

"huh? oh! yes i am. why?" he made himself look like a fool infront of you.

"can you.. help me, i didn't understand the last lecture." you requested sheepishly, shifting closer to him as you pointed to the slides on your laptop.

"oh yeah sure. do you need everything or just a certain section of the lecture?" he asked, scrolling through the slides.

"everything, i'm so sorry." you apologised, feeling embarrassed for requesting something so big.

"don't apologise, that's what friends are for right?" yeonjun smiled, flipping over his notebook to the notes he took down during that lecture.

"friends..? yea, friends." you nod your head, clicking your pen. your heart raced, the same fluttery feeling you felt when he first introduced himself to you.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ why you lookin' at me like i'm boyfriend, boyfriend.

it has been a regular occurrence now, visiting the cafe together to study together despite your different courses. yeonjun feels as if he has gotten closer to you, he feels like he understands you better now. he knows your favourite colour, your favourite type of flowers and your favourite food. such basic things to know about another person, yet it meant so much to him.

yeonjun doesn't know if he's delusional, or reading too much into things. the way you looked at him, the way your fingers accidentally brush against his while you're studying, or the way you talk to him. he doesn't know what to feel.

some people (yeji) told him that you're interested in him, absolutely smitten. he doesn't believe it. no way you'd like him, right? that drunken kiss you gave him the first time you saw him, was just on accident.. right? drunk words or actions mean sober thoughts.. right? he's confused.

do you feel the same unusual feelings?? do you feel the way just like he does? or are you just friendly? then why are you looking at him like he's your boyfriend. it's infuriating. everytime you talk to him, it goes in and out of his head instantly, he's not listening to you. your words turn into sweet melodies for him to listen to. he wants you so fucking bad.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ we would be something more than just friends i'll be honest

yeonjun's phone started ringing, he was in the midst of wrapping up with his dance practice. he grabbed his phone looking at the caller id, it was you. in an instant he picked up.

"yn..?" he mumbled, not wanting to distract the rest who were in the same practice room as him. he slowly packed up his stuff, waiting for you to answer.

"can you come?" your words were slurred, you're drinking again.

"where? the bar or your apartment?" yeonjun sighed, slinging his bag over his shoulder as he made his way out of the practice room after waving goodbye to his friends.

"apartment.." you replied, feeling slightly dizzy.

yeonjun sighed, murmuring a quick, 'see you' before ending the call. he practically teleported to your apartment, knocking on the door, waiting for you to answer.

"yn, open up. i bought some food for you." yeonjun knocked again, trying to make his presence known. soon enough, you opened the door. you looked sluggish and reeked of alcohol.

"how much did you drink..? why did you even drink?" yeonjun looked at you, slightly concerned as he walked into your apartment, locking the front door behind him.

"my grades came out.. real bad.. got a B." you explained. yeonjun frowned, knowing that you were an overachiever and you wouldn't settle for anything lesser than an A.

"it's fine, this isn't your final grade, there's always room for improvement." yeonjun comforted, rubbing your back as he guided you back into your room, placing the food in the kitchen on the way. you sat on the edge of your bed, looking at yeonjun placing his stuff down on the ground. he made eye contact with you.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ i can't make a life without you

"i remember." you mumbled.

"what?" yeonjun's heart started racing.

"the first time i met you, i kissed you.. i remember it." you paused for a while, before continuing. " 'm sorry for suddenly doing that to you. if you feel uncomfortable, we can stop being friends."

yeonjun's eyes widened as he heard your words, he walked towards you, his hand placed on your head.

"what nonsense are you saying, if i was uncomfortable i wouldn't have introduced myself to you in the first place." yeonjun reassured, looking into your glistening eyes. you kept quiet, still feeling guilty for coming onto him that night.

"stop feeling guilty about yourself yn." yeonjun rubbed your hands.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ be there for you, treat you right.

"i like you"

"huh?"

"i like you yeonjun, i didn't know i liked you until you introduced yourself to me. i've always remembered that night, i just didn't want to tell you.. scared that you'd hate me." you stated, rubbing your teary eyes. yeonjun couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"you're drunk yn, are you sure you like me?" yeonjun blatantly asked, it was the first thought in his mind.

"i am! i'm drunk but i know how i feel for you. i've always felt like this but i'm scared of rejection. that's another reason why i drank and called you, i felt more bold. if not, we would always be dancing around the more than friends less than lovers. i hated that! i was so confused–" you rambled, your tears flowing out of your eyes, your heart was hammering against your chest. you were so scared of rejection. yet, why was he suddenly pulling you close? his lips met yours, his hands placed on the small of your back.

you melted into the kiss, kissing him back. it was so electrifying, yeonjun's ears were red as he pulled away, looking straight into your eyes.

"does.. does that answer your question?" yeonjun mumbled, staring at your face, his eyes darting back to your swollen lips.

"mhm.." you hiccuped, wiping away your tears.

"i've always thought that you actually forgot about that incident, i just decided to play it cool, maybe figure out a way for you to like me back. that's why i found out the cafe you always went to from yeji, purposely going there to bump into you." yeonjun explained, using his thumb to wipe your tears before he continued,

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ i ain't like the other guys

"can i be your boyfriend? i'll treat you right, better than any of your past relationships. i'll always be there for you, i won't make you feel confused anymore, my heart beats only for you yn." yeonjun smiled, his words were genuine and sincere. you nod your head, feeling completely estatic.

"good, now let's get you sobered up, i don't want you to have a headache in the morning." yeonjun chuckled, holding onto your hands as he dragged you into the kitchen to eat the food he left on the counter that was now cold.

"you want me to heat it up for you?" he asked. you shook your head, sitting on the chair, struggling to unwrap the bag. yeonjun immediately noticed and placed the cup of water beside you, he grabbed a chair and unwrapped the plastic bag and removed the lid of the food container.

"thank you.." you mumbled, shoving food into your mouth. yeonjun hummed, watching you slowly eat your food in contentment.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ what you like, know it like i know you.

it has been months since you confessed to yeonjun, he has been treating you as if you're glass, always afraid to hurt you, always there to tend to your needs. god you loved him so much just as much as he loved you. finally you could stare at him ramble about anything without him getting suspicious on whether you liked him or not.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ why you looking at me like i'm your boyfriend, boyfriend.

perm taglist! (send an ask to be added :D) @mrsyawnzzn @tinyelfperson @woncheecks @boba-beom @naveries @be-argyu @defnotleee @babymochibeargyu

[hyunj1nsbae]

Distracted | H.H

Chapter 3

Synopsis: Caught in a whirlwind of emotions, you struggle with your complicated feelings for Hyunjin, who bullies you yet captivates your heart. When he starts getting close to the new girl, Yeji, jealousy drives you to confront him. The tension between you escalates, forcing you to face the thin line between love and hate.

Warnings: angst,toxic and manipulative Hyunjin, dirty talk, unprotected p in v (don’t do this😭), fingering, situationship?, some arguing and teasing, making out

Wc: 4.1k

Note : sorry this is kinda angsty I’ll make up for it somehow🥲

The morning sun poured through your bedroom window, spilling warm light across your floor. You lay in bed, tangled in sheets and thoughts of Hyunjin, the teasing bully whose presence had become a bittersweet part of your life. His smirks and taunts were now entangled with an inexplicable jealousy that had begun to fester within you. It didn’t help that he had recently been spending an alarming amount of time with a girl you’ve never seen before, Yeji, a girl who seemed to effortlessly draw his attention away from you.

You shoved your covers aside, dragging yourself out of bed and getting ready for another day at school. You tried to shake off the anxious feeling that had settled in your stomach, a lingering discomfort that grew each time you saw Hyunjin and Yeji together.

After hastily getting dressed, you made your way to school, your heart heavy with the uncertainty of the day ahead. Once you arrived, you spotted your friends Karina and Chaewon near your locker, their voices rising above the bustling noise of students.

“Hey! Over here!” Karina waved you over, her smile warm but fleeting as she noticed the distant look in your eyes.

“Hey,” you said, trying to mask your worries. “What’s up?”

“Just talking about the weekend plans! You’re coming, right?” Chaewon asked, her excitement palpable.

“Sure, sounds good,” you replied, forcing a smile. But your mind was elsewhere, fixated on the sight of Hyunjin and Yeji across the hallway, their heads bent close together in animated conversation. He was laughing—his real laugh, not the teasing chuckle he reserved for you—and it made your heart twist painfully.

“Y/N, you okay?” Karina asked, noticing your distracted gaze. “You seem a bit… off today.”

“I’m fine,” you said quickly, perhaps too quickly. “Just a little tired, I guess.”

As the three of you made your way to class, you couldn’t shake the image of Hyunjin and Yeji from your mind. It was infuriating how easily he had shifted his attention away from you, how he seemed so enchanted by her presence while ignoring you completely.

Throughout the morning, your classes dragged on, each tick of the clock amplifying your anxiety. You found it impossible to focus, your thoughts consumed by Hyunjin’s teasing glances and his recent friendship with Yeji.

I shouldn’t be jealous.

When lunch finally rolled around, you tried to breathe a sigh of relief, but the cafeteria was a minefield of reminders.

As you entered the bustling room, laughter echoed around you, and your gaze instinctively darted to the corner where Hyunjin and Yeji sat together. He leaned back in his chair, effortlessly charming, as Yeji leaned in, her hair cascading over her shoulder. They were deep in conversation, the chemistry between them painfully evident.

I shouldn’t be jealous.

“Y/N, over here!” Chaewon’s voice broke through your thoughts, and you turned to see her waving from a table with Karina. You made your way over, but your heart felt heavy as you tried to shake off the jealousy.

“Are you okay?” Karina asked, her brow furrowing in concern. “You’ve been acting weird.”

“I’m fine,” you insisted, but the words felt hollow even to you. “Just… a bit distracted.”

“Distracted by Hyunjin?” Chaewon teased lightly, trying to lift your spirits. But her comment only made the knot in your stomach tighten further.

“He’s just hanging out with Yeji a lot lately,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “It’s just… it bothers me.”

“Why? Are you interested in him?” Karina probed, her eyes narrowing playfully.

You hesitated, the truth lingering on the tip of your tongue. “No, it’s not like that. I just don’t want to be left behind, you know? He used to pay attention to me.”

“Maybe you should confront him about it,” Chaewon suggested, her tone serious. “You can’t keep bottling it up.”

Before you could respond, Hyunjin walked into the cafeteria, immediately drawing attention. The moment his eyes landed on you, his lips curved into a mischievous smirk, and you felt your heart race. He sauntered over, the confidence radiating off him like a magnet.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite distraction,” he said, leaning casually against the table, his gaze locking onto you with an intensity that made your stomach flutter. “What’s wrong? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

“Nothing,” you shot back, irritation bubbling beneath the surface. “Why do you care?”

“Just wondering if you’re still sulking over me,” he teased, a smirk playing on his lips. The taunt stung, but you refused to let him see how much it affected you.

“Why would I sulk over someone who’s too busy with Yeji?” you retorted, your voice sharper than intended.

Hyunjin’s expression shifted, a flicker of amusement dancing in his eyes. “Jealous much? It’s cute to see you all worked up.”

“Jealous? I’m not jealous!” you snapped, crossing your arms in a futile attempt to shield yourself from his teasing. “I just think it’s pathetic how you can’t see how ridiculous you look.”

“Pathetic?” he echoed, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “That’s rich coming from someone who can’t take their eyes off me.”You could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, a mixture of embarrassment and frustration. “You think you’re so charming, don’t you?”

He leaned closer, the teasing gleam in his eyes making your heart race. “I know I am. But hey, don’t worry. You still have my attention—at least for now.”

“Wow, how generous of you,” you replied dryly, the sarcasm barely masking your hurt.

“Oh, come on. Don’t act like you’re not a little thrilled,” he said, waving a hand dismissively. “I’m just trying to have fun. Why don’t you join me?”

“Join you? You mean join you and Yeji?” you shot back, unable to hold back the bitterness.

His smirk faltered for a second, and he glanced back toward Yeji, who was still engrossed in conversation with a couple of other classmates. “She’s just a friend,” he said, his tone shifting slightly. “But I can see why you’d be worried. You might actually like me.”

“You’re unbelievable,” you muttered, shaking your head.

“Maybe I am,” he replied, a wicked grin creeping back onto his face. “But you’re the one who can’t stop thinking about me. Just admit it.”

You huffed, frustration bubbling over. “You think you can just toy with everyone’s feelings? You’re such a bully, Hyunjin.”

“A bully? Oh please, I’m just having a little fun,” he replied, his tone dismissive. “If you can’t handle it, that’s your problem.”

With that, he turned away, leaving you seething with a mix of anger and jealousy. You couldn’t believe how he had just brushed off your feelings, as if they were nothing more than a passing joke.

“Ugh, he’s insufferable,” you muttered to Karina and Chaewon as they exchanged worried glances.

“Maybe you should tell him how you really feel,” Karina suggested.

“Yeah, like he’d actually listen,” you replied bitterly. “He only cares about his own ego.”

As lunch wound down, you attempted to focus on the conversation with your friends, but Hyunjin’s words echoed in your mind. You couldn’t shake the feeling that you were slowly losing him to Yeji, and the jealousy was eating you alive.

After school, you headed to your favorite café to study with your friends. The atmosphere was relaxed, and you desperately tried to focus on your notes. Yet, every few minutes, your thoughts drifted back to Hyunjin and Yeji, the way they laughed together, the way he looked at her. It felt like a knife twisting in your chest.

“Y/N, are you even paying attention?” Chaewon’s voice broke through your haze.

“Sorry,” you said, forcing your eyes back to your notes. “Just… a lot on my mind.”

“Is it about Hyunjin?” Karina asked, her tone softer now.

“Yeah,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “I just can’t help but feel jealous every time I see him with her. It’s like he’s forgotten I exist.”

“Maybe he’s not as oblivious as you think,” Chaewon said, her eyes searching yours. “He could just be messing with you.”

You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I don’t know. He’s such a bully. One minute he’s teasing me, and the next, he’s all over Yeji. It’s confusing.”

“Maybe you should call him out on it,” Karina suggested. “Tell him how you feel instead of keeping it bottled up.”

“I can’t just confront him. He’ll laugh at me,” you replied, frustration spilling over.

“Or he might actually take you seriously,” Chaewon countered, her voice firm. “You won’t know until you try.”

Just then, your phone buzzed with a message from Hyunjin, making your heart race. “Hey! Can’t wait to see you at the café. Just finishing up practice with Yeji.”

Your stomach twisted, the message feeling like a slap in the face. You quickly set your phone down, unable to process how easily he had shifted from your ‘friend’ to someone who could easily ignore your feelings.When Hyunjin arrived, his presence filled the café, the air around him buzzing with confidence. You felt a mix of excitement and dread as he approached, his usual smirk firmly in place.

“Well, look who’s still here!” he said, glancing around the table. “What are you all talking about? Miss me?”

“Hardly,” you shot back, your tone sharper than intended. He raised an eyebrow, clearly unfazed. “You know, you’re not as entertaining when you’re sulking.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t be sulking if you weren’t busy flirting with Yeji all the time,” you snapped, unable to keep the jealousy at bay.

Hyunjin chuckled, a cruel amusement dancing in his eyes. “Jealous much? You know I can hang out with whoever I want, right?”

“Yeah, I get that,” you shot back, your voice rising. “But you don’t have to flaunt it in front of me.”

“Flaunt? I’m just living my life. If you can’t handle it, that’s your issue,” he replied, leaning back in his chair with an air of arrogance.

“Why are you so mean?” you asked, frustration boiling over. “You think it’s funny to mess with everyone’s feelings?”

He leaned closer, a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Feelings? you should be grateful I even acknowledge you. You’re lucky I haven’t completely ignored you like you’re trying to do with me.”

“You’re impossible,” you shot back, your heart racing with anger and hurt.

“Maybe, but you’re the one who can’t seem to get over me,” he said, his tone teasing yet serious. “Just admit it—you’re into me.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but the words got caught in your throat. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he affected you, but the truth was, you were still drawn to him despite the way he treated you.

“Whatever, Hyunjin. Do what you want,” you finally said, standing up to leave.

He watched you go, his expression unreadable, and as you exited the café, you felt a mix of anger and heartache. You knew you had to confront him, but the thought terrified you.

That evening, as you lay in bed, the tension from the day replayed in your mind. The jealousy, the teasing, and the way Hyunjin seemed to revel in making you feel small weighed heavily on your heart. Tomorrow, you resolved, you would find a way to tell him how you felt, no matter how scared you were. You couldn’t keep letting him bully you emotionally.

The next day, you approached school with a sense of determination. You were ready to face Hyunjin and confront the feelings that had been bubbling beneath the surface for too long. The air felt charged as you navigated the crowded hallways, searching for him amidst the throng of students.

When you finally spotted him, he was leaning against a locker, chatting with Yeji, the two of them laughing together in a way that made your heart sink. You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the confrontation.

“Hyunjin,” you called out, trying to keep your voice steady.

He turned to you, that infuriating smirk creeping across his face. “What do you want?”

You felt a rush of frustration, but you pushed it down. “Can we talk?”

“Sure, but make it quick. I’m busy,” he said, waving a hand dismissively toward Yeji before turning his full attention to you.

You took a step closer, your heart pounding in your chest. “I’m tired of this, Hyunjin. Tired of you messing with my feelings. You think it’s funny, don’t you?”

“Messing with your feelings? I’m just having fun,” he replied, crossing his arms. “If you can’t handle it, that’s your problem.”

“It’s not just fun for me!” you snapped, your voice rising. “I care about you, and you act like I don’t exist when you’re with her!”

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow, surprise flickering across his face for a moment. “Care about me? You really think that’s how this works? You think I owe you something?”

“No, but I thought we had something,” you shot back, your heart racing. “You’re just going to throw that away because it’s convenient?”

“Throw it away?” he echoed, his expression shifting to annoyance. “You act like I’m the one playing games. You’re the one getting jealous over nothing.”

“It’s not nothing! You know how I feel!” you exclaimed, desperation creeping into your voice.

He stepped closer, a teasing glint in his eyes. “Then why don’t you just tell me you like me? Admit it.”

Your heart raced, the truth hanging heavy in the air between you. “I’m just tired of you being a bully.”

He smirked, his gaze locking onto yours with a predatory intensity. “A bully? Or just someone who knows how to have fun?”

“Both,” you replied, your voice trembling. “But you don’t have to be this way.”

“Maybe I like it this way,” he shot back, his voice dropping slightly, making your pulse quicken. “Maybe I like getting a reaction out of you.”

You glared at him, anger and desire warring within you. “You know what im done, I can’t do this anymore”

The confrontation with Hyunjin had left you seething, your heart racing with a mix of anger and something more confusing. You couldn’t shake the feeling of being pulled in by his magnetism, despite the cruel taunts he hurled your way. You turned away, trying to catch your breath as you walked down the dimly lit hallway, your thoughts a chaotic storm.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Hyunjin’s voice called out from behind you, dripping with mockery. You felt the familiar flutter of nerves in your stomach but forced yourself to keep walking, refusing to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.

You turned a corner, only to find him blocking your path, leaning casually against the wall with that infuriating smirk. “Running away again? You really can’t take it, can you?”

“Why do you always have to be such a jerk?” you shot back, frustration bubbling over. “I’m done with your games, Hyunjin.”

He pushed off the wall and stepped closer, invading your personal space. The air between you crackled with tension, and you could feel the heat radiating off him. “Games? You think this is a game?” His tone turned serious, and you could see the flicker of something darker in his eyes. “You’re the one who’s playing with fire.”

You swallowed hard, the proximity igniting something primal within you. “I’m not scared of you,” you said defiantly, though the way your heart raced betrayed your words.

“Is that so?” he asked, raising an eyebrow as he stepped even closer, until you could feel the heat of his body against yours. “Then why are you breathing so heavily? You’re telling me you don’t feel anything right now?” You opened your mouth to respond, but he closed the gap between you, capturing your lips with his in a forceful kiss. It was unexpected, and you gasped against him, your body reacting before your mind could catch up. His lips moved against yours with a fierce urgency, dominating the kiss in a way that left you breathless.

“Hyunjin,” you murmured, trying to pull away, but he gripped your waist, holding you in place as he deepened the kiss. His tongue slid against yours, igniting a fire deep within you. You felt a rush of heat surge through your body, your resolve beginning to crumble.

“Admit it,” he breathed against your lips, his eyes dark and intense. “You want this just as much as I do.” You fought against the tide of desire threatening to sweep you away. “I don’t want anything from you,” you said, but the words felt hollow, barely above a whisper.

“Liar,” he replied, smirking as he leaned in again, his lips brushing against your neck, sending shivers down your spine. “I can feel how much you want me. You’ve wanted this since the moment we started.”

Before you could protest, he turned you around, pushing you against the wall with a possessive grip. The cool surface sent a rush of adrenaline through you, heightening every sensation as he leaned in closer, his breath hot against your ear. “Let’s see how far you’re willing to go.”

“Hyunjin, don’t—” you started, but he cut you off with another heated kiss, his hands sliding under your shirt to explore your skin. The sensation of his fingertips against your waist sent your mind spiraling, and you couldn’t help but lean into him, craving more.

“Just stop talking,” he murmured against your lips, his eyes dark with lust as he continued his exploration, pushing your shirt higher until it bunched around your ribs. His fingers traced the curve of your waist, teasingly moving toward your chest.

“Just let go,” he urged, his voice low and sultry. “Trust me. I’ll take care of you.” You hesitated for a moment, your heart racing as you weighed your options, but the heat of the moment drowned out any lingering doubts. “Fine,” you said, your voice shaky but resolute. “But don’t think this means I’m falling for your tricks.”

His smirk widened, and he pressed his body against yours, pinning you against the wall. “Whatever you say,” he replied, his lips crashing down on yours again, more demanding this time. He was intoxicating, every kiss sending shockwaves of desire coursing through you, making it impossible to think straight.Hyunjin’s hands roamed lower, teasing the waistband of your skirt, fingers brushing against your skin with a skillful touch that made you gasp. “You’re so responsive,” he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck. “I love how easily you fall apart for me.”

“Shut up,” you breathed, but the words lacked conviction as he pressed kisses along your collarbone, igniting a fire deep within you.He grinned against your skin, the sound of his laughter sending heat to your cheeks. “Make me,” he taunted, his fingers finally slipping under your skirt, finding the edge of your panties. The sensation of his fingers grazing your thigh sent a rush of pleasure coursing through you, and you gasped, arching into him.

“Hyunjin,” you whimpered, feeling your resolve slipping away as he teased you, fingers brushing against your core. The thrill of being caught in this moment—of giving in to him—made your heart race.

“You like that?” he asked, his voice dripping with arrogance as he began to rub gentle circles against your panties. “You want me to keep going?”

“Y-yes,” you managed to stutter, your body betraying you as the heat pooled low in your stomach.

He smirked, a wicked gleam in his eyes. “Good girl,” he replied, his fingers sliding beneath the fabric, the contact sending shockwaves of pleasure through you. You gasped as he pressed against your sensitive clit, his fingers moving with a slowness that made you ache for more.

“Hyunjin, please,” you begged, your voice barely a whisper. “I need more.”

He chuckled darkly, clearly enjoying your desperation. “I knew you’d come around. Just a little more,” he teased, his fingers working magic as they circled and rubbed against you, each movement sending you higher and higher toward the edge.You felt yourself unraveling, the pleasure building to an unbearable peak as he continued his relentless assault. “I’m so close,” you gasped, feeling the tension coiling tighter and tighter.

“Let go for me,” he urged, his voice low and sultry as he increased the pace, his fingers moving faster against you. “I want to see you fall apart.”

With a final thrust of his fingers, the world exploded around you. Pleasure crashed over you like a tidal wave, and you cried out his name, your body shaking as you reached your peak. The intensity of your orgasm left you breathless, and you clung to him, feeling the aftershocks ripple through your body.

Hyunjin watched you with a smug satisfaction, his eyes dark and filled with desire as he leaned in closer. “You see? This is what happens when you stop pretending,” he murmured, his voice a sultry whisper against your ear. You swallowed hard, trying to catch your breath, but he wasn’t done with you yet. He stepped back slightly, enough to let you catch your breath, but the lustful glint in his eyes made it clear that he was far from finished. “Now it’s my turn,” he said, a wicked grin spreading across his face.

Before you could respond, he pushed you onto the desk, the cool surface pressing against your back as he climbed on top of you, trapping you beneath him. “Let’s see how good you really are,” he said, his voice low and commanding.You looked up at him, heart racing, feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension as he hovered over you. “Hyunjin, wait—” you started, but he silenced you with another fierce kiss, his hands gripping your wrists and pinning them above your head.

“I told you to stop talking,” he growled, his breath hot against your lips. “Just enjoy it.”

He leaned down, capturing your lips again, his body pressing against yours with an intensity that made your head spin. You could feel the heat radiating off him, the weight of his body a tantalizing reminder of his power over you.

As he moved against you, the friction ignited a new wave of desire, and you gasped against his mouth. “Hyunjin,” you moaned, your body arching into his, craving every ounce of him.

“See? You’re starting to understand,” he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck as he continued to grind against you, the sensations sending you spiraling again. “You want this just as much as I do.”

“Just shut up and kiss me,” you replied breathlessly, your body responding instinctively to him as he captured your lips once more, the kiss deepening as he thrust his hips against yours.

“Now you’re getting it,” he growled, the thrill of power evident in his tone. His hands roamed over your body, exploring every curve as he lost himself in you, a dangerous hunger driving his every move.He pressed harder against you, the desk creaking beneath the weight of your bodies as he continued to claim you, his kisses growing more urgent, more possessive. You could feel the heat rising within you again, every nerve ending alight with desire as he moved against you with relentless intensity.

“Hyunjin,” you gasped, your body responding to his every thrust, the tension building once more. You could feel the world around you fading, leaving only the two of you lost in this moment of reckless passion.

“Let go,” he commanded again, his voice low and filled with need. “I want to see you fall apart again.”

With every thrust, every kiss, you felt yourself teetering on the edge, the fire within you raging hotter than ever. “I’m ..so close,” you breathed, the urgency in your voice unmistakable.

“Good,” he replied, a dark satisfaction glimmering in his eyes as he quickened his pace, his body moving against yours with an unyielding rhythm. “Now, cum for me.”

With that final push, the world exploded around you once more, pleasure crashing over you as you cried out his name, the heat consuming you as you surrendered completely to the moment.

Hyunjin followed closely behind, his body shuddering as he reached his own peak, filling you completely as the two of you came together in a wave of ecstasy.As the waves of pleasure subsided, you lay there, breathless and spent, the tension that had ignited between you two dissolving into a warm afterglow.

Hyunjin leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “See? I knew you’d come around,” he said, a smug grin on his face, the arrogance in his tone unmistakable. You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips, knowing that despite everything, this connection was addictive.

One thing you knew for sure though - you couldnt keep up with this much longer.

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[midmourn]

mune ga hachikire-sōde (my heart seems like it’s going to burst)

title mune ga hachikire-sōde (my heart seems like it’s going to burst)

pairing huang renjun x gender neutral!reader

summary you and your friends always sit at the table a couple down from mine and talk shit in madarin, which happens to be a language i’m currently learning. i’ve been eavesdropping to try and improve my listening comprehension and oh my god are you actually talking about how pretty i am???

characters huang renjun, zhong chenle [nct], liu yangyang [wayv], hwang yeji [itzy]

warnings none but it does imply you speak korean as well

word count 812

author’s note rewrite from my old blog. italics = mandarin

Here’s the thing: you were pretty firm on privacy. You didn’t like yours getting invaded by nosy people, and even have scolded so many for doing so. Yet, here you were; eavesdropping. You were no better than them.

You usually tried to ignore the group of boys that always sat at the same table, talking shit about people in their lives in Mandarin.

But could anyone really blame you? When the pretty boy with stars for eyes kept glancing over in your direction and commenting to his friends in Mandarin, “Aren’t they so pretty? … No, the one facing us.”

You ducked your head, feeling heat rise to your cheeks as you barely managed to hide your growing smile. If you just smiled at seemingly nothing, you’d seem like a weirdo.

Yeji eyed you with a weird look, brows furrowing, “What’s got you all smiley, huh?” She poked you in the arm with her pen.

You shushed her quietly, shaking your head as you leaned in to whisper to her, “You see the boy with the white cardigan?” When she briefly looked over and nodded, you continued, “He’s telling his friend about how pretty I am in Mandarin.” You giggle.

A grin rose on her lips, looking over again, “What’s he saying now?”

“His friend’s asking why he won’t come talk to me,” you keep your head down, seemingly focused on your laptop. “Stop looking over there! You’ll get us caught.”

“Sorry, sorry,” she giggled, looking down at her notebook. “Hey, what’s the answer for number two?”

“You’re only on two?” Your mouth dropped open in shock. Yeji shrugged, cheeks flaring. “It’s C. Anyways, he’s saying he won’t ‘cause he doesn’t want to embarrass himself if I was already taken,” you hum, glancing up momentarily and accidentally making eye contact with the cute boy.

His cheeks flushed red, head snapping back to his friends, “They just caught me looking at them! See!” His friend’s head turned to look at you, “No! Don’t look, dumbass!”

“I agree, he’s a dumbass, but look at what?” A dark haired boy joined the conversation, speaking in Korean instead of Mandarin.

His friend hushed him, “Shut up! Don’t speak in Korean.”

The boy blinked.

“Don’t look, but you see the person studying with the girl with braids in her hair behind me?” The boy with his back towards you asked the new boy. You could see out of the corner of your eye that the new boy looked towards your direction anyway.

“Dude,” the cute boy groaned in exasperation, putting his face in his hands.

“He asked if I could see them! How was I not supposed to look?”

“Whatever, Renjun thinks they’re pretty.” Renjun was the boy’s name, huh? You smiled to yourself.

“They are. Go tell them that, ge,” the boy said.

“Are you crazy? I’m not going to make a fool out of myself!” The cute boy’s—Renjun— voice cracked cutely at the end.

“Why not? You don’t know what will happen!” The other nameless boy said.

“They’re way too pretty for me,” Renjun shook his head again, cheeks red as he kept making small glances to you. You felt as if your heart was about to burst out of your chest. “I said no,” he added firmly in Korean when the boy opened his mouth to speak again.

The boy shrugged, “Fine, I will.” Ignoring Renjun’s protests, he stood and made his way to you. Your heart pounded in your chest at the thought of confrontation. You scribbled a word on your notebook, pretending to be busy. When he approached your table, both you and Yeji looked up. “Hi, I’m Chenle. You see my friend over there?” Your heads turned to see that Renjun was now clutching the menu, hiding behind it. Chenle sighed in disappointment, “Yeah, the weirdo hiding behind the menu. Anyways, he thinks you’re pretty.”

You knew this already, but your cheeks flushed red. You smiled, “I know.” Chenle’s brows rose in shock at your confession and you could hear the other boy voice his confusion at their table, making you giggle. “I know Mandarin.” You looked at the time on your phone and smiled again, looking up at Yeji, “It’s getting late, my mom will kill me if I’m not home before eight.” Chenle watched as the two of you got up.

You grabbed a paper and pen, quickly writing on it before giving it to Chenle, “Give this to your friend.” You looked up and sent a wink, but in your head, you were freaking out, but managed to keep your cool.

You finished packing your things up and smiled one last time at the group of boys before walking out with your friend.

Renjun grabbed the paper hastily from Chenle and started to read it, his cheeks getting even more red if possible.

i think you’re pretty cute too, and my name’s y/n.

so now that you know mine, i think it’s fair enough that i know yours. :)

***-***-****

- y/n <3

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networks @k-films

[hwanchaesong]

━⁠☞🍽️ Second Course: He treats you so well, and you're naive enough to believe that only you have the key to his tasty heart. Or his pants. 🥢

🎧: Olivia Rodrigo - Traitor

wc: 1.0k

genre & warnings: angst, some fluff, mentions of sex, cursing, crying, there's another girl, lovers to exes, pure heartbreak :D , Yeji of ITZY special appearance etc etc

a/n: this is a part of The Sour Restaurant series. if y'all want, you can read the other album inspired fics of other groups here.

ps. i've already reposted this but it still won't appear under the tags that i've put so ig i'll just let it be lmao. imma just post it the way it is bc i'm tired of trying and thinking on what to do to make it work.

At the tender age of 13, you took note of everything that was written in an article that you accidentally opened and read on a fishy website entitled, 'Signs that your partner is falling out of love.'

You thought it would help you avoid conflict with a future partner, it would help you evade an impending heartbreak, but nothing can prepare you for the real world, it seems.

Your boyfriend, Park Seonghwa, was the definition of a picture perfect man.

He's kind, respectful and loving. He had all the love languages.

He never shunned away from skinship, and most of the time, he's the one who's initiating it. Giving you hugs and kisses even in public without any ounce of shame.

Even when he's busy, he still gives you the time of his day. Often, he would choose to lose sleep if it means that he'll be able to talk and see you after a long, tiring day at work.

He's also the type to buy 'just because' gifts. Randomly walking around a park then he'll see this cute bunny keychain, buying it immediately so he can give it to you because the bunny reminds him of you.

Fixing collars, tying shoelaces, cooking you food— he does it all, and naturally too. The way he pampers you like a mother hen is the sweetest thing you have ever seen in a man.

The most important thing though? It's his ability to listen and soothe all your worries away. He tells you that if you're overthinking, you can simply say it to him and he'll gladly give you all the assurance that you need.

So, what went wrong? Where did it go wrong? Is there something wrong with you?

The situation at hand made you question yourself, then again, are you really the problem here?

"The least you can give me is a reasonable explanation!" you yelled, gripping Seonghwa's arm that was holding his suitcase, attempting to stop him from leaving you without any form of closure.

"Well, what do you want me to say?" he snapped, raising his usual soft voice at you, something that he has never done before.

"A reason! Explanation, anything! Why are you suddenly breaking up with me?!" you blinked rapidly, the itchiness in your throat makes it harder for you to breathe, and the sinking feeling of dread in your stomach is urging you to vomit.

This is so fucking messed up.

Just last night, Seonghwa was fine. He even made love to you in your shared bed, whispering how good you are for him.

Last week, he brought you flowers. Last last week, he took you to a nice restaurant for dinner. Last month, he took you to Maldives for a summer getaway.

Nothing changed and everything felt the same, thus, the current happenings don't make sense.

You come home from work and the next thing you know, your significant other of how many years are mumbling nonsense of going separate ways. That you two are better off without the other.

You just don't fucking understand what the hell went wrong.

"I don't love you anymore."

You never knew that a mere sentence that is composed of five words is more than enough to break your heart, your world.

He doesn't love you anymore?

"Since when?" you weakly muttered, wanting answers that will probably hurt you more.

"For the last few months."

You winced, there were no signs of him not loving you. He must be lying, his shaky chocolate orbs say otherwise.

"Okay." you speak, no more energy to fight for him, to fight for a battle that is not worth the blood, sweat, and tears.

Just like that, you watched him walk away. Out of your home, out of your life, and you were left alone. Crying your heart out, gripping your chest as it physically hurts as well, the pain searing through you.

Two weeks later.

Your friend, Yeji, was making a ruckus, she was basically shoving her phone in your face.

"Y/N, look! Isn't this your ex?"

You peeked at the device, and your heart dropped along with your mood.

What the fuck?

That is your only reaction at the photo posted on Seonghwa's instagram because it hasn't been a month, and here he is, with a girl that he's being lovey-dovey with.

A girl.. a familiar one.

"That fucker." you uttered menacingly, your fists tightly clenched on your lap as your friends worriedly glanced at you.

Isn't that the one you asked him about? The fucking girl that was lingering around him all the damn time like a wretched fly. He told she's nothing but a co-worker.

Sure. Kissing your co-worker on the cheeksin a field of maple trees is very professional, isn't it?

You are not sure what to feel. He broke up with you so he could date that girl, it seems.

Should you be thankful? Or should you curse him until he dies?

Either way, now that you're thinking about it, maybe he really didn't fall out of love with you, just that he found someone that he loves more. There was no proof, but there was evidence of his upcoming betrayal.

The way he was always on his phone, and maybe, all the things he had done for you before were nothing but distractions so you wouldn't notice what he was doing behind your back.

A lady's gut never lies, yet you choose to ignore it, and this is what you get.

You laughed yet the tears dripping down your cheeks is the complete opposite of your actions.

Not once did you hear him apologize during the argument about the break-up, and my god, did you hate him so much for entering your life like a storm and leaving such a mess behind.

Park Seonghwa is no cheater, but he is a raging traitor.

Then again, no one is at fault here but you, as you should've seen this coming. You should've been alert, using your rationality instead of your useless heart, and now you're paying the price for his treason.

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