#yes I’m 26!

[spaghettiisinmysoul]

Suddenly realized… I can just buy a Barbie and play with her. She doesn’t need to look like me. I don’t need to buy Ken and make him look like me. I can just buy a Barbie and give her a name and a story and a life. She doesn’t have to be me. She can be herself.

[cadmusfly]

Tag Yourself: Unabridged Shitty Drawing Marshal of the Empire Edition

Yes All 26 Of Them + Bonus 2

drawn and compiled by yours truly, initial and probably inaccurate research assisted by Chet Jean-Paul Tee, additional research from Napoleon and his Marshals by A G MacDonnell, Swords Around A Throne by John R Elting and a bunch of other books and Wikipedia pages

captions under images

mike (Michel Ney)

- full of every emotion

- always has ur back

joe (Joachim Murat)

- it's called fashion sweetheart

- will not stop flirting

lens (Jean Lannes)

- bestie who will call u out on ur shit

- does not like their photo taken

bessie (Jean-Baptiste Bessieres)

- actually nice under the ice

- was born in the wrong generation

dave (Louis-Nicolas Davout)

- overachiever

- 20 year old boomer

salt (Jean-de-Dieu Soult)

- people think ur up to no good

- doesn’t cope with sudden changes 2 plans

andrew (Andre Massena)

- actually up to no good

- sleepy until special interest is activated

bertie (Louis-Alexandre Berthier)

- carries the group project

- voted most likely to make a stalker shrine

auggie (Pierre Augereau)

- shady past full of batshit stories

- will not stop swearing in the christian minecraft server

lefrank (François Joseph Lefebvre)

- dad friend

- in my day we walked to school uphill both ways

big mac (Étienne Macdonald)

- brutally honest

- won't let you borrow their charger even if they have 100%

gill (Guillaume Brune)

- love-hate relationship with group chats

- pretends not to care, checks social media every 2 minutes

ouchie (Nicholas Oudinot)

- needs to buy bandages in bulk

- a little aggro

pony (Józef Antoni Poniatowski)

- can't swim

- tries 2 hard to fit in, everyone secretly loves them anyway

grumpy (Emmanuel de Grouchy)

- can't find them when u need them

- complains about the music, never suggests alternatives

bernie (Jean-Baptiste Bernadotte)

- always talks about their other friendship group

- most successful, nobody knows how

monty (Auguste de Marmont)

- does not save u a seat

- causes drama and then lurks in the background

monch (Bon-Adrien Jeannot de Moncey)

- last to leave the party

- dependable

morty (Édouard Mortier)

- everyone looks up 2 them literally and figuratively

- golden retriever friend

jordan (Jean-Baptiste Jourdan)

- volunteers other people for things

- has 20+ alarms but still oversleeps

kelly (François Christophe de Kellermann)

- old as balls but still got it

- waiting in the wings

gov (Laurent de Gouvion Saint-Cyr)

- infuriatingly modest about their art skills

- thinks too much before they speak

perry (Catherine-Dominique de Pérignon)

- low-key rich, only buys things on sale

- “let’s order pizza” solution to everything

sachet (Louis-Gabriel Suchet)

- dependable friend who always brings snacks

- lowkey keeps the group together

cereal (Jean-Mathieu-Philibert Sérurier)

- unnervingly methodical and precise about fun

- will delete your social media after u die

vic (Claude Victor-Perrin)

- loves spicy food but can’t handle it

- says they're fine, not actually fine

Bonus!

june (Jean Andoche Junot)

- chaotic disaster bisexual

- will kill a man 4 their bestie

the rock (Géraud Duroc)

- keeps a tidy house

- mom friend with snacks

[snazzycrown]

So, I switched programs shortly after the Wip I gave you guys, wanted to give y’all the new and improved one. This program has been far kinder! I’m currently at 40 seconds. My only complaint is they don’t have a dedicated Gaussian blur from what I can tell…

Also, to give you guys some fresh content: have a comic!

This screams them. Don’t mind my inconsistency with Theo, I’ll get in the grove someday.

[soundtracksforthebrian]

Kenny fans when he talks for 3 seconds in the new episode

[dailyragbros]

a bit late but good luck on your pulls!

[mr-up-on-a-downer]

and I know this is the old men fucker website but you really don’t hear people fetishizing dudes in their 30’s like they do for women in 30’s. Nobody is going to call me a 27 year old dilf

[woohooincoffin]

Hispanic parents are crazy because why are both of my parents telling me if I got pregnant now with no partner no financial security and no house it wouldn’t matter because they want a grandchild. Ok calm down and go think about what you said

[lunar-years]

It actually pisses me off so much when people call parents and particularly dads weird or creepy because they kiss their children…loser behavior!

[reikunrei]

at least spending most of the day at home tomorrow will mean i can crank out some more fic. so there’s a plus

[itsforeating]

having fun + playing!!!!!

[lesbianstarlightglimmer]

All right wish me luck imma tell my mom I don’t plan on ever going to church again lol. For real life this time

[gardengnomehome]

Pro tip: if you don’t have access to actual stuffing when doing amigurumi, use cotton balls.

[tmholland]

happy new year y’all 🥹🫶🏼

[chryzure]

okay so the accidental marriage fic is um? pseudo modern (b4 social media but in a time period w phones. maybe 90s/early 2000s??). mostly because i think it’s funny to have chrysi CONSTANTLY forced to forge her id to make sense, since she doesn’t age. officer, i swear i was born in 1972. wait wdym it says 1956. fuck that’s the wrong id

[hella1975]

that™️ coworker: have I complimented you today?

me knowing he has twice already: no

him: well we can’t have that, you look lovely :)