tipofthemountain

[tipofthemountain]

anyways… new life motto is good graces by sabrina carpenter

STREAM SHORT N SWEET!!!

[tipofthemountain]

i got a boyfriend!!!! i said with joys.

i was then shot 57 times.

(please tell me you know that tiktok audio or i’ll scream…)

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if you want to know my favorite song rn (and has been since June 10th)

literally can’t get enough of it… LOVE IT SO BAD

[tipofthemountain]

no one asked but i’m going to list my top 5s from every taylor swift album because if you’ve read my story’s you know i’m a fan of hers! (this is so long i just wanna talk about it…)

Starting with her debut (still waiting for re-release HELLO!!???) album it holds a special place in my heart for so many reasons but one being that i sung Our Song IN FRONT OF MY ENTIRE SCHOOL FOR A TALENT SHOW with a friend(at that time). This was probably when i was in i think 3rd or 4th grade so i was like 9-10ish. I don’t think we took home awards but we had fun and that’s all that matters to me!

For debut:

1: Our Song

2: The Outside

3: Picture to Burn

4: Teardrops on My Guitar

5: I’m Only Me When I’m With You

Fearless (Taylor’s Version) is probably my least favorite ts album (IM SORRY!) just because i never connected with it in any special way. obviously its still an iconic album, i just don’t care much for it! the only song i ever connected with was Fifteen in the most depressing way possible…

For Fearless tv:

1. Fifteen

2. White Horse

3: Mr. Perfectly Fine

4. Bye Bye Baby

5: The Way I Loved You

Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) is my 3rd favorite album of hers. I UNFORTUNATELY relate to way to many songs on this album… it’s genuinely sad. It’s a great album to cry and shake your ass too! The only thing i don’t like about this album is the vault tracks…( IM SORRY AGAIN PLEASE DON’T KILL ME!)

For Speak Now tv

1: The Story Of Us

2: Haunted

3: Better Than Revenge

4: Mean

5: Never Grow Up

Red (Taylor’s Version) is in my top 5!Its such a good fucking album. If I could I would tattoo every lyric from every song onto my body. She literally changed the way people feel about turning 22 instead of 21… an iconic album forever!

For Red:

1: Treacherous

2: I Bet You Think About Me

3: Stay Stay Stay

4: All To Well (10 minute version)

5: Sad Beautiful Tragic

1989 (Taylor’s Version) IS MY FAVORITE ALBUM EVER! Nothing will ever top debut pop Taylor ever. Being a directioner during this release and then being a harrie during the re-release was an absolute mind boggling experience… 10/10 album forever my favorite.

For 1989 Tv:

1: “Slut!”

2: Wonderland

3: Wildest Dreams

4: Clean

5: Style

Reputation (also waiting for the re-release… quit teasing us Taylor!!!) is also one of my favorites! It’s a love album disguised as a revenge album. Also it’s peak pop Taylor too. It deserved a grammy and I will forever feel like she was robbed of that.

For Reputation:

1: Don’t Blame Me

2: So It Goes…

3: Getaway Car

4: Dress

5: This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Lover is so crazy to be right after reputation (I know how she feels about these songs now!) but I love Taylor in love. She writes such beautiful love songs that you either cry too or have sex too.

For Lover:

1: False God

2: All The Girls You’ve Loved Before

3: Death By A Thousand Cuts

4: Daylight

5: The Archer

FIRST OF ALL.. folklore being right after lover does NOT feel right what’s so ever in any universe will it ever feel right. I love when she tells silly story’s and and mixes her real life into it!

For Folklore:

1: mirrorball

2: this is me trying

3: mad woman

4: peace

5: the lakes

evermore IS MY SECOND FAVORITE!! Literally I love it more than folklore (even though Taylor doesn’t…) It’s soooo fucking beautiful start to finish. I listen to it on repeat constantly!

For evermore:

1: no body, no crime

2: cowboy like me

3: gold rush

4: dorthea

5: happiness

Midnights and I have a complicated relationship… because I go months without listening to any song from it and when I do listen to it again… I can’t help but love it. I honestly hate how much i relate to way to many of Taylor’s songs…

For Midnights:

1: Vigilante Shit

2: Maroon

3: Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve

4: Snow On The Beach (Ft. More Lana Del Ray)

5: You’re On Your Own, Kid

and we’ve reached the end with The Tortured Poets Department… don’t get me wrong I like album a lot, just some of the songs don’t hit like I thought they would. It’s a good album but (and this is purely my opinion!) but she has made better albums.

For TTPD:

1: My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

2: Fresh Out The Slammer

3: Florida!!! (Ft. Florence + the Machine)

4: So Highschool

5: thanK you aIMee

of your still here… thanks <3. I know some people are gonna yell at me but honestly if i don’t care! I love Taylor’s music. I admire her as a songwriter and as a singer. Also I could care less who the fucking songs are about… she just makes good songs.

also if your a follower… a story should be up soon!! 💋

[tipofthemountain]

how c.ai works and why it's unethical

Okay, since the AI discourse is happening again, I want to make this very clear, because a few weeks ago I had to explain to a (well meaning) person in the community how AI works. I'm going to be addressing people who are maybe younger or aren't familiar with the latest type of "AI", not people who purposely devalue the work of creatives and/or are shills.

The name "Artificial Intelligence" is a bit misleading when it comes to things like AI chatbots. When you think of AI, you think of a robot, and you might think that by making a chatbot you're simply programming a robot to talk about something you want them to talk about, and it's similar to an rp partner. But with current technology, that's not how AI works. For a breakdown on how AI is programmed, CGP grey made a great video about this several years ago (he updated the title and thumbnail recently)

I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend you watch this because CGP Grey is good at explaining, but the tl;dr for this post is this: bots are made with a metric shit-ton of data. In C.AI's case, the data is writing. Stolen writing, usually scraped fanfiction.

How do we know chatbots are stealing from fanfiction writers? It knows what omegaverse is [SOURCE] (it's a Wired article, put it in incognito mode if it won't let you read it), and when a Reddit user asked a chatbot to write a story about "Steve", it automatically wrote about characters named "Bucky" and "Tony" [SOURCE].

I also said this in the tags of a previous reblog, but when you're talking to C.AI bots, it's also taking your writing and using it in its algorithm: which seems fine until you realize 1. They're using your work uncredited 2. It's not staying private, they're using your work to make their service better, a service they're trying to make money off of.

"But Bucca," you might say. "Human writers work like that too. We read books and other fanfictions and that's how we come up with material for roleplay or fanfiction."

Well, what's the difference between plagiarism and original writing? The answer is that plagiarism is taking what someone else has made and simply editing it or mixing it up to look original. You didn't do any thinking yourself. C.AI doesn't "think" because it's not a brain, it takes all the fanfiction it was taught on, mixes it up with whatever topic you've given it, and generates a response like in old-timey mysteries where somebody cuts a bunch of letters out of magazines and pastes them together to write a letter.

(And might I remind you, people can't monetize their fanfiction the way C.AI is trying to monetize itself. Authors are very lax about fanfiction nowadays: we've come a long way since the Anne Rice days of terror. But this issue is cropping back up again with BookTok complaining that they can't pay someone else for bound copies of fanfiction. Don't do that either.)

Bottom line, here are the problems with using things like C.AI:

It is using material it doesn't have permission to use and doesn't credit anybody. Not only is it ethically wrong, but AI is already beginning to contend with copyright issues.

C.AI sucks at its job anyway. It's not good at basic story structure like building tension, and can't even remember things you've told it. I've also seen many instances of bots saying triggering or disgusting things that deeply upset the user. You don't get that with properly trigger tagged fanworks.

Your work and your time put into the app can be taken away from you at any moment and used to make money for someone else. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people who use AI panic about accidentally deleting a bot that they spent hours conversing with. Your time and effort is so much more stable and well-preserved if you wrote a fanfiction or roleplayed with someone and saved the chatlogs. The company that owns and runs C.AI can not only use whatever you've written as they see fit, they can take your shit away on a whim, either on purpose or by accident due to the nature of the Internet.

DON'T USE C.AI, OR AT THE VERY BARE MINIMUM DO NOT DO THE AI'S WORK FOR IT BY STEALING OTHER PEOPLES' WORK TO PUT INTO IT. Writing fanfiction is a communal labor of love. We share it with each other for free for the love of the original work and ideas we share. Not only can AI not replicate this, but it shouldn't.

(also, this goes without saying, but this entire post also applies to ai art)

[tipofthemountain]

So russian and belarusian athletes are banned from competing under their countries' flag for the war in Ukraine but Isreali athletes are still allowed to compete under Isreali's flag despite Isreal's genocide being 4 times as deadly as the Ukrainian invasion?? Fuck Isreal. Fuck Russia. Fuck the Olympic Committee. Free Palestine. Free Ukraine.

[tipofthemountain]

fuck yeah Palestine just showed up and the reporters actually recognized them i was a bit worried about them being one of those countries that they just showed in the tiny little box next to ads

Fuck Isreal btw they should not be allowed to compete

[tipofthemountain]

My blog is a safe place for most people...

...just not for bigots, thieves, generative a.i. users, and their apologists.

[tipofthemountain]

I am going to say something that might piss people on this site off, and that is that the stabbing at a Taylor Swift themed event in Southport does not exist in a vacuum.

It exists in a world where a joke about bringing a nail gun to the Eras tour to shoot fans gets 400k likes on TikTok, or where a reel about crashing a plane full of Swifties gets 200k likes on Instagram. It exists in a world where, on this very website, the one that promotes itself as rational and reasonable, someone says that "Taylor Swift and her fans should all die violent horrible deaths" and people applauded it. It exists in a world where, during TTPD release week men were in Swifties' comment sections declaring they would beat their daughters and girlfriends if they ever so much as listened to one of her albums. And it exists in a world where this week, fans of a TV show (which I will not name because that is not the point) sent death threats to a girl on Twitter for daring to be a fan of both their beloved show and Taylor Swift.

I don't give a fuck what your opinion of Taylor Swift is. I don't care if you think her music is grating, I don't care if you think she is the worst thing to happen to humanity since Eve ate the god damn apple. This is the dark side of stan culture that no-one talks about; where dislike of an artist becomes so obsessive that it becomes normal, even funny, to joke about killing their fans, because "it's just online, it's just a joke". It isn't. It is rarely ever "just online".

And yes I am going to be That Person and say that you can complain about Swift's brand of feminism and debate her position as a feminist icon all day long, at the end of the day, her name is still synonymous with girls. It doesn't take a genius to work out who this event was geared at.

I am not going to sit and claim that by simply not liking Taylor Swift you directly caused this. I would encourage you to step back, look at the bigger picture of stan culture, including obsessive dislike of an artist, and ask yourself how much this culture has enabled this. If making jokes on tiktok about killing someone over a pop star is normalised, how much of a leap is it to attacking kids with a knife at a fan event?

and of course there is the fact that the british media didn't even wait until those kids were buried before using this event to spread their racist, anti-immigrant agenda despite the race of the attacker not being known. all I can say to that is I am sickened and disappointed but not shocked.

[tipofthemountain]

so it goes

pt.2 of actress!

part one

tags: Biker!Simon “Ghost” Riley x Actress! Afab reader, absolutely filthy smut, a little fluff, basically porn with a plot. NSFW! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

word count: 2.2k

summary: Reader rides Simon in the back of her limo after winning big at the oscars.

a/n: giggling like a school girl, kicking my feet and shit as if i didn’t write this…

ps: i’m not that great at writing smut so bear with me please 🤞🏻

smut below the cut! you’ve been warned!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

“And the winner for best actress goes to!” Halle Berry stands in front of the 100s of people holding that oh so important golden envelope with tonight’s winner in it.

What you didn’t expect was for your name to be said into the microphone. The only look on your face is shock. You stand up with your hand on your heart. Your entire table stands in ovation as does the entire room. Simon of course beside you as you brought him as your plus one. He doesn’t like the spot light but how could he say no to you? You kiss him in front of everyone not caring about the headlines tomorrow morning.

“Congratulations my love.” He says after you release him from the soft kiss. Simons normal leather jacket and blue jeans being replaced by a fancy black suit that cost more than a lightly used car.

Your movie “Tales of a Wicked Woman” was nominated for 4 oscars tonight. Best Supporting Actress, Best Director, and Best Actress, and Best Picture. You and your costar Amy Heart taking home awards.

As you walk up the stage you pass by celebrity’s who give you congratulations and patting you on the back. Merle Streep even blew you a kiss which nearly made you faint.

As you take the award from Halle with a quiet ‘thank you’ you take a deep breath before giving the speech you didn’t prepare.

“Wow okay… um. I’m in shock. This has been something I’ve been dreaming of since I was 10 years old.” You shyly say into the microphone looking down at the shiny award. You look back up immediately locking eyes with Simon to ground yourself.

“I want to thank all the women before me who have won this award. I want to thank the woman who come after me who win! I want to thank my family who’s watching at home! I want to thank my agent for getting me this role. Thank you to everyone in this room even if you hate me! Most importantly I want to thank my amazing fiancé for always pushing me to be my absolute best.” You mouth an “I love you’ to the camera but you know it’s for Simon. A music tone plays letting you know the 45 seconds of speech time is up.

As your escorted backstage the oscar you just won is taken by some backstage handyman but you don’t question it. Your then escorted back to your seat moments later to here the winner of the Academy Award for Best Picture.

As last years winner for best actress Emma Stone makes her way to the stage to present the award you take a breath in and grab Simons hand tightly.

“And the Academy Award for Best picture goes to…” Emma says slowly opening the golden envelope. The entire room feels like it goes quiet.

“Midnight In Manchester!” Screams of excitementerupt from the table beside you as your coworkers all cheer for the winners.

You try not to let it show on your face how disappointing it is that your film wasn’t picked but then again, how often does an all female lead cast get picked for best picture? You stand up happily clapping and send a congratulatory smile to the winners as they pass your table.

‘Midnights in Manchester’ was a mob movie. It was about the son of the biggest mob boss finding it difficult to continue running the business after his father mysteriously died. The son (you not caring to much for the one thousandth mob movie being made cared to learn character names) wanted to be a painter but had to take over the family business. From the clips you saw online the movie looked gorgeous, the cinematography was beautiful… but that’s not what makes a great movie. Hell it even took home the award for best cinematography earlier that night. You found that some of the lines where cheesy and the actors where unprofessional. The main guy didn’t even have that thick of a Manchester accent and you would know! Your fiancé scores the deepest (and sexiest) Manchester accent you’ve ever heard.

After being collected by your manager you walk around for 30 minutes giving fake kisses followed by hellos and goodbyes to a few of your colleagues. Simon being glued to your hip acting more of a body guard than your actual body guards did.

༺𖤓༻

After 30 more minutes of even more hellos and goodbyes you’re escorted off the premises and into your limo. Simons hands almost immediately working their way up and under your dress.

You don’t stop him. You let him lay you flat against the long soft seats and let calloused hands run up your thighs. He stops just at the trim of your lace panties and looks you lovingly in the eyes.

“My little Oscar winner.” He whispers before clashing his lips into yours. You lace your hands in his perfectly laid hair.

Good thing your limo has extra tinted windows or else your driver and the entire world are about to get the show of a life time.

Simon pulls your panties completely off you and stuffs them into his pocket. With his skillful hands he slowly makes his wake up and down your sweet folds. You moan at the contact and roll your head back disconnecting from Simons lips.

“So wet for me darlin’” He whispers into your ear as he painfully slow enters a single digit into you.

He makes quick work pumping his finger in and out of you. Moans of pure bliss being spilled from your mouth. Hushed words of ‘i love you’s’ and ‘you feel so good’ being exchanged from both of your mouths.

Simon then adds another finger curling them and you hitting that blissful spot inside. His palm flat against your clit adding more friction pushing you to your climax.

“I can see your face. You’re holding it in. Cum for me baby. Cum all over my fingers.” Simons voice pushing you over the edge of the precipice. You ramble out his name as your body cools down from the first orgasm.

After catching your breath you sit up watching as Simon licks his fingers clean from your juices. Which only fuels the fire growing in the pit of your stomach again.

You notice Simons erection and work your way towards the buttons of his dress pants. However he stops you which makes you pout playfully.

“Don’t make that face.” Simon says in a authoritative tone. You continue to pout however, not caring for the punishment that’s surely ready to come.

“Let me help you.” You whine which you know Simons weak too. He just can’t get enough of how much you want him. Him? He who has probably done things so unspeakable yet you still want him?

“It was your night my love. This whole night should be for you.” He says placing a gentle kiss to your lips. You truly don’t care however and unbutton his pants anyway.

You pull yourself onto Simons lap and he pushes the fluffy red mess of your dress up enough to expose your beautiful things.

“If it’s my night then let me help you. Let me make you feel good too.” You whisper seductively in to his ear. He groans in response which tells you he gives you permission to use him as you please. Which he was going to to let you do anyway.

As he did with you, you have your hands in his pants in no time pulling out his hard cock and stroking him. He throws his head back as you rub your thumb across the pre-cum leaking from the tip his cock. You place kisses down his neck and down his bare torsos. ‘When did that get unbuttoned?’ You question shortly before you place your self in front of him.

Simons eyes haven’t left your face since the second you started making your way down his body. Your mouth hovering over his leaking cock. You swirl your tongue around his tip before wrapping your pretty red lips around him completely. His large size making it impossible to take him fully into your mouth. You wrap your hands around the base of his cock pumping him as you bob your head up and down his cock.

All that can be heard from Simon is blissful moans and hushed words.

“God woman.” Simon says softly placing his hands in your hair not wanting to undo the work your hair dresser spent hours doing.

You can always tell when Simons close because he starts rambling on about how much he loves you and how he can’t wait to marry you. Its how he proposed actually. A little unorthodox but you where going down on him when he popped the question. Obviously a month later he made sure to do it properly with a real ring and a beautiful day planned.

You pull your mouth off Simon however and sit your self on his lap once again. You pull his lips to yours and wrap your hands into his now perfectly messy hair. You’ve lined your bare core to his leaking tip and slowly start to sink your way down inch by inch. You pause when you’ve sunken all the down. You lay your head down on Simons shoulders leaving red lipped kisses all over his neck working your way up to his face. You quickly imagine the headlines that will be shown in the morning.

Simon practically growls when you start to bounce on his cock. Your hands laced back into his hair as you pepper kisses between sweet nothings.

“M’not gonna last long my love.” Simon struggles to get out. He rests his forehead against yours as you continue to bob up and down his large cock.

“Want you to cum in me.” You says slowing your movements to make this last longer. Just enough so your orgasm times perfectly with his.

Simon takes matters into his own hands and begins to move your body up and down his cock. The movements being harsh and fast yet still loving compared to your more gentle ones. You still find euphoria in his movements moaning his name most likely too loudly. You think to your self about how much your driver must really hate you right now.

As your reaching your second orgasm of the night Simon begins to hold you in place as he fucks up into you signaling he’s just as close.

“Oh fuck.” Simon slams you down onto his cock with one harsh yet gentle stroke which causes you to cum with him. You feel his cock leaking inside you as the both of you ride out your shared highs together.

You place more sloppy kisses on his face, your lipstick long gone seeing as you just had to spread it all over his body.

You move your head back to look Simon in the eyes. The obvious look of him being pussy drunk still on his face. You giggle as he smirks pulling you into another kiss.

You pull yourself off Simon and take the seat next to him pulling your dress back down over your legs. Your underwear still being in Simons pocket and you not caring to ask for them back because you know this won’t be last orgasm you have tonight. You watch as Simon tucks himself back into his pants and button his shirt back up. The obvious marks of your lips still being all over his collar, neck, an face.

“I look like I was fucked by 20 hookers.” Simon jokes making you laugh loudly. His smile bright as he uses the foggy window to fix the messy hair you caused.

You feel the limo slowing down as your limo driver has finally made his way to one of the many Oscar after party’s. You quickly straighten out your dress and hair and rub the remaining lipstick off your face with a near by napkin. Simon not bothering to do the same. You offer him one but he doesn’t take it.

Your limo comes to a slow stop and your door is opened by your security team. Bright lights are snapped as you make your way to the door of the grand hotel the party will be taking place. Pictures of your red lips planted all of Simons face and your smirking face to surly be planted all over celebrity news and fan pages tomorrow. You and Simon walk hand and hand into the building with the bright lights following until your out of sight from cameras.

“Can’t wait to see what they’re all gonna say tomorrow.” Simon laughs placing a gentle kiss to the temple of your forehead.

༺𖤓༻

“After Winning best Actress at the oscars last night, the star of ‘Tales of a Wicked Woman’ was seen leaving her limo with her fiancé. The stars lipstick completely smeared all over her partner Simon Riley, who was an extra in the show ‘Highway To Your Heart’. The pair looked to have had a good time in the back of the shared limo before arriving to the Oscars after party.” The article of TMZ writes. You show Simon the article the next morning which only earns the two of you laughs and giggles.

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

final thoughts: SHES FINALLY FUCKING HERE OMG!! i know i said i was gonna post this forever ago and i kept changing my mind about what i wanted part two to be. i was either going to make pt2 where the first part left off or this. this has been sitting in my drafts for such a long time that i think it’s finally her time to be released. i changed somethings from this post but i think all the main points are still there. i also got carried away i think 🧍🏻‍♀️. oh well. I thought of making up more imaginary actors/actresses but then I didn’t want too. Also I have no idea how the Oscars work so if it’s inaccurate then my bad! I hope this doesn’t disappoint :)

I KNOW I SAID I WOULDN’T USE ANOTHER TAYLOR SONG BUT I CANT HELP MYSELF!! SHES GOT LIKE A THOUSAND SONGS. HER DISCOGRAPHY IS HUGE!!!

Also my requests are open! I’ll be adding a post soon of things you can and can’t ask me!

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! love ya lots!

let me know if you want to be added to a tag list!

slightly inspired by this song :*

[tipofthemountain]

the moment i knew

(inspired by: the moment i knew by taylor swift!)

tags: Simon “Ghost” Riley x Fem! reader, angst, no use of y/n, reader has a best friend named Sam(gender neutral pronouns used).

word count: 1.4k

summary: What do you say, when tears are streaming down your face in front of everyone you know? And what do you do when the one who means the most to you is the one who didn't show?

a/n: this is pretty short but angst is my specialty 🤭 happy reading!

likes, comments, and reblogs appreciated!

requests are open!

masterlist!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

Your eyes stay set on the front door of your parents home waiting for him to walk through. All day since the moment you woke up you’ve been watching the door just hoping the next person to walk through would be him.

You’ve faked smiles all day for the sake of the party. After all, your parents went through all the trouble of setting the whole thing up and you don’t want to seem ungrateful for all their work. But all those smiles could have been real if only he’d walk through that door.

The only person who actually seemed to notice your pain was your best friend Sam. They’ve watched as every five minutes your eyes wonder to the front door. They’ve watched as your face constantly changes every time someone walks through the door and it’s not him. You don’t seem to notice them when they walk over to you.

“Hey, your dad was just telling everyone about this giant fish he caught at some random lake.” Sams bubbly personality drawing your eyes from the door to them for a split second.

“He said he’d be here.” You don’t acknowledge what Sam just told you as you watch the door again. You want to walk out the damn door and find him and yell at him for not being here but you know better. You know it wouldn’t solve anything. You turn towards Sam as tears you’ve been holding all day fall from your eyes.

Sam pulls you into a tight hug. Your forehead rests against their shoulder as you silently sob against them. You didn’t want to cry. You hated crying. You were sick of crying. And it was all because of him.

“Honey, I- “ Sam goes to say but stops themself. Almost like they knew they were about to tell you a lie you knew wasn’t true.

You pull back from Sam and look into their eyes as you stifle your cries. Sam wipes the tears from your eyes trying not to smudge your makeup. They give you a pity smile and hold your hands in theirs.

“I just want to be alone.” You pull away from Sam and walk away not wanting anymore pity from them. You know it was out of the kindness of their heart but you couldn’t handle it right this moment. It would only upset you more.

You walk to the bathroom and lock the door behind you. You rest your hands against the cold sink counter and let out a shaky sigh to stop you from crying more. You try this several times only for it to not work. The tears fall from your face once again. You frantically wipe them from your face as you watch the black of your mascara smudge in the mirror. Your hands find the counter again as you once again stifle your cries.

“He promised he’d be here.” You say to your self in the mirror. The only thing left intact about your makeup is the red lipstick you adorned early this morning. You want to wipe it off. You want to tear the matching red party dress off and just go to bed. You want to forget this day ever happened. But you won’t. You won’t because all your friends and family are waiting out there for you.

You find yourself backing into the wall and sliding down it. You rest your head against the wall and look up at the ceiling to stop the eventual tears from coming. You don’t know how long you sat like that until you hear a knock at the door.

“Sweety, your dads about to light the candles.” You hear your moms voice on the other side of the door. You stand up quickly taking one last glance in the mirror trying to fix your ruined makeup. You open the door slowly coming face to face with your mother. She’s got that same pity smile on her face that Sam had. You return the smile only yours being disingenuous. She wipes the remaining smudged mascara that you missed from your eyes and plants a soft kiss to your forehead. She wraps her arm around yours.

You glance at the door again as she walks you into the dining room where everyone you know is standing around the table. They all stare at you as you walk to the chair beside where your father stands. He has a lighter in his hand ready to light the many candles on the cake in front of you. one by one he lights them and when he’s finished everyone begins to sing. An awfully off key version of happy birthday erupts around you. You smile throughout the song blowing out your candles. You use your birthday wish on him. You wish he would walk though that door with open arms and apologies.

Sam is beside you and rests a hand on your shoulder squeezing it slightly. A signal letting you know their there. You return a small smile thankful for them.

You try to socialize but every time you talk to someone they ask about him which only makes you fall further down the rabbit hole of sadness.

“So how is your boyfriend?” A distant cousin you hadn’t seen in ages asks. You want to say something snippy out of anger but you didn’t.

“He’s good.” You fake smile and excuse yourself to talk with other friends only to be asked the same question. It seemed that no matter where you turned they all asked about him. Except Sam. They never asked. And secretly that bothered you because everyone else here has asked but Sam. You know deep down though they didn’t want to upset you more than you already were.

It was that point in the day where you could no longer be sad about him. You were becoming angry. It was enough he made you cry on your birthday but for him to make you angry was beyond reasoning.

The sun had started to set and everyone was starting to leave. You faked smile once more and said goodbye to everyone as they walked out the door. You watched as everyone left just to see if you could see him walking down the drive way.

Sam was the final guest the leave. They stayed to help your parents pick up a little of the party.

“I’m sorry honey. I love you though. I hope you know that.” Sam kisses your cheek goodbye.

“I love you too.” You smile as you watch them leave. You watch the door close only hoping for it to swing open with him walking through the door.

A door opening with the one you love being behind is the one thing you wanted for your birthday but that was never going to come. You said your good nights to your parents and headed for your room.

As you change into your night cloths you lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. Sadness and anger rest inside you. You hear your phone buzz on your nightstand. The photo of you and him light up the screen. ‘Simon’ is written across the screen as your phone continues to buzz. You don’t even hesitate to pick it up even though you should’ve.

“Hey.” You say trying not to let any emotion shine through. The phone is so close to your ear you can hear him breathing on the other end.

“Hi. Happy birthday.” Simon says to you. It’s so flat the way he says it. There’s no emotion to it, like he almost doesn’t mean it.

“Thank you.” So you return his dryness. You want to cry. You want to scream at him. You want to beg him to explain why he wasn’t here but you don’t. Your expressionless.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t make it. Something came up.” He makes an excuse. You almost scoff at it. Your sure it’s a fake apology as well. He isn’t sorry or else he would have been here. Like he promised.

“I’m sorry too.” You hang up the phone just as quickly as you answered it. You rest the phone beside you on the bed.

You stare ahead of you for a few seconds before you feel the bed vibrate. You glance down at your phone seeing ‘Simon’ across it again. You break this time. You let out a silent scream as to not alert your parents and cry the hardest you’ve ever cried. You want to throw your phone in anger. You want to scream. But all you can do is cry.

And that was the moment you knew.

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

final thoughts: listen okay i know i’ve used one too many taylor swift songs for my story’s… but her songs are just such good inspiration for me. i could write a million stories with her songs and have a different one every time. i promise though that i’ll hold back on using her songs. i promise i listen to more artists than just taylor too… not many but there are others.

ps: the ending is inspired by that one scene in the all too well short film (iykyk)

love you thanks for reading!

(pps: one of my fav songs from red tv!)

[tipofthemountain]

i just wanted you

the original post!

tags: simon “ghost” riley x gn! reader, lots (and i mean lots) of angst, cursing, let me know if I missed anything!

word count: 1.27k

summary: It’s not always easy being with someone who never lets you in side their head.

a/n: this is the alternative ending to i just want you! i actually like this version better teehee. you don’t have to read the original! this can be read as a stand-alone! if you want however, you can read the original to spot the changes! happy reading!

NOT EDITED

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

It always seems to rain in movies when something sad happens. It applies to the situation at hand right now.

You and Simon had been together officially for a few months now. After months of ‘i just don’t think it’s time’ or ‘i’m not the relationship type’ Simon finally asked you to be his girlfriend. Of course it was rocky, a story with a sad beginning always ends with a sad ending. You thought it would all eventually work out though. Simon would open up to you about everything he’s been through. He would talk to you about something, anything you didn’t care. The only things you do know are the things his friends have only slightly hinted at.

So when Simon came home in a complete shut off mood (again) it set something off in you. You’ve had enough.

“I can’t do this.” You whisper just enough for him to hear. Simons head moves toward your direction. Your back is turned to him as you stand in the kitchen. He’s sitting with a cup of water in his hands at the dining table.

“What?” Simon asks. His eyes bore into the back of your head almost like he’s trying to telepathically get you to look at him.

With a single tear running down your face you rest one of your hands on your hip. You look up to the ceiling with a sigh escaping your lips.

“You… this… us. I can’t do the whole you shutting me out at every chance you get.” You finally turn to Simon looking into his light eyes.

He’s standing there looking down at you with an unreadable expression. He’s silent and doesn’t say anything for a minute and neither do you. You wait for what feels like hours for him to say something but he simply doesn’t. So you walk away into the living. A few more tears slip from your eyes but your face doesn’t change expression. You aren’t sad you’re more angry than anything.

Simon follows you but keeps his distance. You hear him let out a sigh before finally saying something.

“I can’t lose you.” He says but that only makes you chuckle.

“You can’t lose me? That’s all you have to say?” You turn towards him laughing except there is no joke.

“I’m sorry. This is who I am.” He says walking toward you but you put your hand out to stop him from getting close.

“It doesn’t have to be. You could just talk to me when you come over instead of just shutting me out.” You sigh rubbing your temple and taking a seat on your couch.

Simon takes a seat beside you but still at a distance. His hands clasp in his lap and you look at him through your peripherals.

“I don’t know how to talk about these things. I never learned how. It’s been the one thing I’ve struggled with my entire life.” Simon lets out. He’s twirling his fingers together awkwardly waiting for you to say something.

“I just want to know how your day is when you come over. I want to know your favorite color. I want to know how your friends are doing. I want to know you Simon.” You say looking back into his eyes. You can see his eyes are slightly more wet than usual.

“I-“ Simon begins to say but stops himself. This only makes you more angry. You stand up in front of him and throw your hands up in exhaustion.

“I’m ruining myself trying to be there for you. I’m standing right fucking here begging for you to just let me in to your life but you won’t let me!” Your voice becoming louder than you wanted it to. The anger finally bubbling to the surface. You’ve had enough.

“I don’t know what I’m doing! I’ve never felt this way before. Not with anyone ever. I’m scared you’ll leave just like everyone else!” Simon stands above you yelling back just not as loud as you. His thick accent shining through with every word he threw out.

“I’m don’t want to go anywhere! But you are making it so hard to want to stay! I don’t care about anything except for you. I just want you!” Your eyes begin to betray you. A waterfall of tears cascades down your face as Simon moves to hold you. You shove him away. He doesn’t make an effort to try again which only makes you disappointed for a reason you don’t understand.

You walk away from him with a scoff back to the kitchen. You stand at the sink that’s full of dirty dishes from the meal you shared earlier. You wipe the tears from your face as you hear Simon walk in behind you.

“Tell me what to do. Tell me how to make this better.” Simon says in a low hushed tone. You turn to face him with his unreadable expressions as always. A skill you know your never going to learn. His arms hang beside his torso so sadly it almost makes you want to apologize but you know better. You can’t keep living like this.

“There is no ‘making this better’ Simon. You did this… you’ve ruined what could have been.” You talk calmly compared to your earlier demeanor. It’s almost pathetic the way Simons standing. He’s defeated. He knows what he did and now he’s facing the consequences.

“Please.” He begs. He wonders over to you but you put a hand out to stop him. Your hand on his chest as he looks down at you. Your eyes are swelled with tears begging to fall but you hold your composure. You push him away again. You know you would never normally have to strength to do this. You know he’s walking himself backwards to give you the space you beg for.

“It’s over Simon. We’re over.” You walk away again to the front door of your house. You stand there as Simon meets you at the door. He gives you one last look as you watch him grab his coat and then the door handle. He stops and turns to you with that same unreadable expression.

“Im sorry. Im sorry I couldn’t be what you deserve. Im sorry I stayed silent instead of giving you answers to things you’ve wondered for nearly a year. I’m sorry you felt you had to stay. Im sorry for keeping you out. I’m sorry I couldn’t be better. I’m sorry I couldn’t be who you needed me to be.” Simon looks deeply into your eyes. His words catching young surprise but the damage has been done. Your heart is broken and no amount of apologies could fix that. You stay silent with teary eyes. Simons hand still in the door knob as he waits for you to say something.

There is no fixing the many months of silence and the future of this love is over. Maybe he could have opened up but that’s not who he is. Maybe he would have tried that to be better. It’s all you wanted him to do but you can’t always fix something that broken.

“I just wanted you.” You finally say. Simon takes the hint of your words realizing this really is the end. He twist the door knob and walks out your home. Out of your life. As soon as you hear the click of the door closing the silence takes over your now empty estate. This silence being sad. The only sound that can be heard is the heavy fall of the rain outside. The silence gets to you faster than you want it to. You collapse to floor with heavy tears cascading down your face and onto your floor.

There is no happy ending for this sad beginning.

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

final thoughts: this is like a few hundred words shorter but i genuinely love this version sooooo much better. i wrote the original from a situation i had been in personally except my version ended up more like this. obviously its not exactly how mine happened but it’s pretty accurate. finally getting rid of that person in your life that was just absolutely draining everything from you is so freeing. in the moment losing the person you thought was the love of your life is genuinely soul crushing, but time genuinely does heal you. You’ll come to find out that that person was absolutely the worst choice you could have made and the best choice was kicking them the fuck out of your life. I’m yapping over here but i genuinely hope you loved the story :’).

Love ya! Thanks for reading!

also as i’m rereading this to post it… it’s definitely giving off the 1 vibes.

[tipofthemountain]

tipofthemountain masterlist!

Everything I’ve ever written will be here!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

how to identify which works are what!

fluff ✿

angst ✮

smut ⟡

drabbles ୨୧

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

Call Of Duty:

Simon “Ghost” Riley:

- actress: Reader is a famous actress and Simon comes to visit her on set! ✿ ⟡ (slight smut!)

-so it goes: pt2 of actress: Reader rides Simon in the back of her limo after winning big at the oscars. ✿ ⟡

- potential part 2 (but not really) for actress ୨୧ ⟡

- simon is so the archer by taylor swift coded ୨୧

- i just want you: It’s not always easy being with someone who never lets you inside their head. ✮

- i just wanted you: The alternative ending to i just want you! ✮

-the moment i knew: inspired by the song ‘the moment i knew’ by taylor swift. ✮

- To the dark side where love sleeps: In which Simon encounters a very intense vampire. ✮ ⟡ COMING SOON!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

Marvel:

Coming Soon!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

Miscellaneous:

My Top 5s from every Taylor Swift album: basically me ramblings about my favorite songs!

[tipofthemountain]

My constant struggle when writing PWP

[tipofthemountain]

i just want you

my requests are open!

the alternate ending!

tags: simon “ghost” riley x gn! reader, lots (and i mean lots) of angst, cursing, let me know if I missed anything!

word count: 1.3k

summary: It’s not always easy being with someone who never lets you inside their head.

a/n: :D happy reading! teehee

my requests are open!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

It always seems to rain in movies when something sad happens. It applies to the situation at hand right now.

You and Simon had been together officially for a few months now. After months of ‘i just don’t think it’s time’ or ‘i’m not the relationship type’ Simon finally asked you to be his girlfriend. Of course it was rocky, a story with a sad beginning always ends with a sad ending. You thought it would all eventually work out though. Simon would open up to you about everything he’s been through. He would talk to you about something, anything you didn’t care. The only things you do know are the things his friends have only slightly hinted at.

So when Simon came home in a complete shut off mood (again) it set something off in you. You’ve had enough.

“I can’t do this.” You whisper just enough for him to hear. Simons head moves toward your direction. Your back is turned to him as you stand in the kitchen. He’s sitting with a cup of water in his hands at the dining table.

“What?” Simon asks. His eyes bore into the back of your head almost like he’s trying to telepathically get you to look at him.

With a single tear running down your face you rest one of your hands on your hip. You look up to the ceiling with a sigh escaping your lips.

“You… this… us. I can’t do the whole you shutting me out at every chance you get.” You finally turn to Simon looking into his light eyes.

He’s standing there looking down at you with an unreadable expression. He’s silent and doesn’t say anything for a minute and neither do you. You wait for what feels like hours for him to say something but he simply doesn’t. So you walk away into the living. A few more tears slip out of your eyes but your face doesn’t change expression. You aren’t sad you’re more angry than anything.

Simon follows you but keeps his distance. You hear him let out a sigh before finally saying something.

“I can’t lose you.” He says but that only makes you chuckle.

“You can’t lose me? That’s all you have to say?” You turn towards him laughing except there is no joke.

“I’m sorry. This is who I am.” He says walking toward you but you put your hand out to stop him from getting close.

“It doesn’t have to be. You could just talk to me when you come over instead of just shutting me out.” You sigh rubbing your temple and taking a seat on your couch.

Simon takes a seat beside you but still at a distance. His hands clasp in his lap and you look at him through your peripherals.

“I don’t know how to talk about these things. I never learned how. It’s been the one thing I’ve struggled with my entire life.” Simon lets out. He’s twirling his fingers together awkwardly wait for you to say something.

“I just want to know how your day is when you come over. I want to know your favorite color. I want to know how your friends are doing. I want to know you Simon.” You say looking back into his eyes. You can see his eyes are slightly more wet than usual.

“I-“ Simon begins to say but stops himself. This only makes you more angry. You stand up in front of him and throw your hands up in exhaustion.

“I’m ruining myself trying to be there for you. I’m standing right fucking here begging for you to just let me in to your life but you won’t let me!” Your voice becoming louder than you wanted it to. The anger finally bubbling to the surface. You’ve had enough.

“I don’t know what I’m doing! I’ve never felt this way before. Not with anyone ever. I’m scared you’ll leave just like everyone else!” Simon stands above you yelling back just not as loud as you. His thick accent shining through with every word he threw out.

“I’m not going anywhere! Not until you tell me too! I don’t care about anything except for you. I just want you!” Your eyes begin to betray you. A waterfall of tears cascades down your face as Simon moves to hold you. At first you push him away but eventually give up. He’s quietly muttering ‘i’m so sorry’ and ‘i’ll be better’ over and over again into your ear.

After 30 minutes of you bawling into his arms and Simon repeating himself you pull back from him to which he actually lets you this time. You don’t know when you ended up on the floor but you don’t make an effort to get up either.

“My favorite color is green. My friends are a bunch of jack asses. My day was spent training recruits and prepping for a mission. I don’t like the way the cook at base makes tea. I used to have a german shepherd named Riley.” Simon spills out information catching you off guard. You look up at him and his big hands cup your cheeks. His thumbs while your tears away gently. You say nothing and just look into his eyes. You still can’t read his expression but maybe that’s a trick that will come in due time.

“I’m more of a rugby fan than football. I don’t like seafood. I can’t stand people who chew gum loudly. I’m not a cereal person. My guilty pleasure is listening to pop music.” Simon continues on after you say nothing. His hands made their way to your own. He’s rubbing his thumb across your knuckles softly. All these useless facts that you’ll forever remember. It’s not a lot and you know this. It’s only the beginning but everything had a start. Your still silent so Simon continues to ramble. He lets everything and anything out.

“I don’t talk about my family because I have a hard time remembering them. I know you know they were all murdered and Im still not able to talk about it. Maybe one day I will be. I want to be able too. It’s just difficult.” He says with a heavy sigh. A tear he’s been trying not to let slip this entire time finally drops onto the floor. You take your hand and swipe the tear line from his face and rest your hand against his cheek which he melts into.

“Im sorry. Im sorry I haven’t been what you deserve. Im sorry I’ve been silent instead of giving you answers to things you’ve wondered for nearly a year now. Im sorry you felt you had to stay with me even though you could have left. Im sorry for keeping you out. I’ll try from here on out to be better. I’ll be anything you want me to be.” Simon looks deeply into your eyes. His words tunneling deep into your heart.

While yes there is no fixing the many months of silence, there is to fixing the future. He’s not always going to be open because that’s not who he is but for you he’s trying and that’s all you ask. It’s all you want him to do.

“I just want you.” You finally say. You lips seal with Simons in a slow kiss. After releasing from the kiss you take Simon into a rough embrace. Your arms wrapped around each other’s body’s. You stay like this for what feels like hours. The silence being more comforting than before. This silence being good.

You pull away from Simon and he watches as a smile creeps into your face as you let out a laugh. This one being more of a happy one then the sarcastic one before.

“So your favorite color is green? I always thought you where more of a blue person.” You say smiling. Both you and Simon laugh before embracing a happy kiss onto to each others lips.

Maybe there will be a happy ending to this sad beginning.

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

final thoughts: i might 🤏🏻 write a alternative ending to this where there is a not so happy ending. Depends on how this does! I’ve been trying to get this to post for like 2 days now so if your reading this it means it worked! YIPPEE!

Also! I’m still dealing with a bunch of medical crap but i’m okay! I’m just trying to live dude.

Love ya! Thanks for reading!

[tipofthemountain]

As a reminder:

Soldiers date & marry people of all body types, appearances, backgrounds, personalities, and abilities.

There's a fandom stereotype that the men of CoD only pursue thin, petite, long-haired, large-breasted, demure, hyper-feminine women.

Soldiers are regular people. Their personal tastes are varied, not limited to women who resemble Bratz dolls or men who look like they haven't eaten a carb since 2019.

[tipofthemountain]

why does no one talk about the fact that Simon is so ‘ the archer’ coded.

requests are open!

༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻༺𖤓༻

It’s not because the opening line is ‘Combat, I'm ready for combat’. The one lyric that just speaks him is ‘I've been the archer, I've been the prey’ because in so many ways he has been both.

And if and/or when Simons in a relationship ‘Screaming, who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay?’ is the perfect lyric to describe what his mind would be like.

To get a little on the nose ‘I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost’ because since he was a child sleep never came easy to him.

And for his team and lovers ‘Can you see right through me? They see right through me, I see right through me’ because as hard as he try’s not to let his emotions show he’s not always the best at it. He’s got 100s of miles of walls built up around him but sometimes they crumble. More walls being built every-time someone close to him dies.

teehee might turn this into a one shot 🤭