unbidden-yidden - Tumblr blog

[unbidden-yidden]

Chag Pesach Sameach, everyone!

This is it!

If you need me, I'll be around, just message me at @jewish-song-of-the-day for the URL.

Stay safe, stay well

יְבָרֶכְךָ יי , וְיִשְׁמְרֶךָ

יָאֵר יי פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ, וִיחֻנֶּךָּ

יִשָּׂא יי פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ, וְיָשֵׂם לְךָ שָׁלוֹם

This blog is now going to be mostly inactive, as I am fully moved over to my new main blog. I have created a new sideblog attached to my new main for the Jewish Song of the Day posts, which can now be found over at @jewish-song-of-the-day. This blog is currently on reruns to catch up, but will be starting up with new songs in the near future.

I will be checking messages here sporadically until Pesach, so still DM me for the new URL if you wish to follow me at my new main blog.

After Pesach I do not intend to check this blog anymore, so please send any future inquiries to the @jewish-song-of-the-day blog instead, where I will actually see it.

It's been swell, folks!

להתראות!

Edit: For the folks asking why, here is the explanation post.

[unbidden-yidden]

This blog is now going to be mostly inactive, as I am fully moved over to my new main blog. I have created a new sideblog attached to my new main for the Jewish Song of the Day posts, which can now be found over at @jewish-song-of-the-day. This blog is currently on reruns to catch up, but will be starting up with new songs in the near future.

I will be checking messages here sporadically until Pesach, so still DM me for the new URL if you wish to follow me at my new main blog.

After Pesach I do not intend to check this blog anymore, so please send any future inquiries to the @jewish-song-of-the-day blog instead, where I will actually see it.

It's been swell, folks!

להתראות!

Edit: For the folks asking why, here is the explanation post.

[unbidden-yidden]

This blog is now going to be mostly inactive, as I am fully moved over to my new main blog. I have created a new sideblog attached to my new main for the Jewish Song of the Day posts, which can now be found over at @jewish-song-of-the-day. This blog is currently on reruns to catch up, but will be starting up with new songs in the near future.

I will be checking messages here sporadically until Pesach, so still DM me for the new URL if you wish to follow me at my new main blog.

After Pesach I do not intend to check this blog anymore, so please send any future inquiries to the @jewish-song-of-the-day blog instead, where I will actually see it.

It's been swell, folks!

להתראות!

Edit: For the folks asking why, here is the explanation post.

[unbidden-yidden]

Jewish Album of the Week: Simu Lev

Y'ALL

It's finally out!! Simu Lev is here, and it's exactly as amazing as I'd hoped!!!

Please listen to this and enjoy this with me, I promise you won't regret it!!!

[unbidden-yidden]

Omg someone just sent me hatemail here as if that isn't the weakest fucken thing to send hatemail to the blog I'm already winding down

Did you do it? Do you feel strong? Pumped? Bigger? Better about yourself? Like you really Did Something and Made Change?

I bet you don't.

I bet you feel frustrated with your empty seething, like all people who try to fill the pain of their powerlessness with punching at someone in reach.

But just in case you do, I'll let you in on a little secret: I didn't even read past the second line. I got the gist immediately and deleted it.

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Folks I say this with love but: why is this blog gaining new followers when I have my "store closing soon - all posts must go!!!" sign up in my pinned?

Please if you actually like more than one of my posts, just DM me for the new URL lol

This is like walking in five minutes after closing time; I'm already turning the lights out, how did you even get in here??

[unbidden-yidden]

I've been thinking about this reply for a bit, because I did want to respond to it a little.

Thank you for your wonderful support and kind words, I deeply appreciate it.

That said, while obviously there are some serious and sad things happening around this decision, if it's any comfort to you or other folks, this was very much my decision. I am way too damn stubborn to be driven out of a space I love without something much more serious than being blocked by disgusting antisemites or some rude messages in my inbox.

It's actually a positive step for me in recognizing negative behavior patterns in myself and trying to do proper self-care. The thing is that since October, this space has consumed so much of my time and mental space because it's one of a few primary spaces that I can talk about what's happening. And apparently lots of people appreciated what I had to say.

The downside is that it meant that the more feedback I received, the more I engaged, to the point where it ended up that I couldn't focus on anything else in my life except the horror of this conflict. Between that and my old posts talking about triggering things getting circulated, plus also just seeing a steady stream of new antisemitism, it became a negative behavioral feedback loop.

And one day I woke up and realized that I had changed as a person. Trauma changes you, and I have been changed. I needed to step away from the larger platform and process that grief in a space with less of an audience to egg on my overengagement. Making this space into a time capsule, if a slower process this time than last, is a way of limiting my engagement by limiting the feedback I receive.

That doesn't mean that I don't want to engage. Just a little less. It doesn't mean I don't want to remember. Just on my terms.

If you want to follow me over there, please DM me. This is not some rigorous test or popularity contest or screening check. This is just so that I know that the people following me are willing to respect me enough to engage me as a real person with feelings and boundaries, and to have a conversation with me. That's all.

This is not goodbye and I am not being, will not be, silenced. I am simply trying to take care of myself as a responsible adult, and to set reasonable boundaries for myself and others.

Edit: to be clear, the effect that Eden is talking about here is super real, scary, and deserves to be talked about. I just have not personally been a primary target and the assholes who have targeted me have not succeeded in scaring me.

So I'm considering changing tumblrs entirely, but in slower stages than last time. I like the Jewish Song of the Day posts and think it would be disruptive to try to pick that up on another blog, but I think I'm going to queue those posts up and let that be a curtain call.

This blog has gotten extremely large and unwieldy, and I find myself getting more and more anxious every time a new person follows me. I'm not a public figure. I'm not a political commentator. I'm not a journalist. The idea of being famous is like a horror story to me. I'm Just Some Guy.

I'm glad I've been able to be a comfort to other Jews and friends during these awful times. I don't plan on leaving fully, and I will probably continue to talk about these things. But this is starting to feel like the end of a chapter of my Judaism. I closed the chapter on my conversion student blog when I finished my beit din and came here. And over time, the old blog has been like a little time capsule for me to look back on and remember.

This is starting to feel like the end of a different chapter. When I started this blog, I was a Jew without Jewish trauma.

That is no longer true.

I feel changed in some fundamental way, like my place in the world writ large and my place as a Jew and within Jewish community has been changed forever.

There is a purity of love that can only happen before pain, but there is maturity of love that can only happen through and after pain. I loved being Jewish in the unsullied way that only a new ger can, and now I love being a Jew fiercely, as something intrinsic and bone-deep.

I haven't just lived with my Judaism; I've survived with it. And there is both pain and pride in that.

And so perhaps, it is time to close this chapter and begin a new one.

[unbidden-yidden]

You were offline yesterday, weren't you?

petition for tumblr to make the boop feature permanent. reasons:-

so i can shower my affection on mooties and followers without any limits

validates my sense of appreciation and does not make me feel unwanted

every introverts' dream who loves a blog but is scared to talk with them

feels like an actual physical boop

online love language

[unbidden-yidden]

petition for tumblr to make the boop feature permanent. reasons:-

so i can shower my affection on mooties and followers without any limits

validates my sense of appreciation and does not make me feel unwanted

every introverts' dream who loves a blog but is scared to talk with them

feels like an actual physical boop

online love language

[unbidden-yidden]

Together we will forge a great army!

it should be a jumblr trend to have "Hashem's [superlative adjective] [noun]" in bio

😈

[unbidden-yidden]

it should be a jumblr trend to have "Hashem's [superlative adjective] [noun]" in bio

😈

[unbidden-yidden]

Getting some record breaking numbers here

[unbidden-yidden]

*bap* *bap* *bap*

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Wait, what? How do you ~*~evil boop~*~ someone ??

[unbidden-yidden]

sure what's the worst that could happen

[unbidden-yidden]

FYI, y'all have my blanket permission to spam me with as many boops as you need to get those cute badges :3

[unbidden-yidden]

I think I've transferred (most?) a lot of friends and mutuals to my new blog, but friendly reminder for anyone who missed it that this is a live process with a newly established blog I can direct you to!

This blog is now going to be mostly inactive except for the Jewish Song of the Day posts. I will be checking messages, so DM me for the new URL if you wish to follow me over there.

It's been swell, folks!

להתראות!

Edit: For the folks asking why, here is the explanation post.