unwanted-dandelion-seeds - Tumblr blog

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My friends who have never experienced flooding, and who are about to deal with it from this storm, please remember:

1. NO. YOU CANNOT MAKE IT THROUGH THAT WATER ON THE ROAD. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU'RE DRIVING. TURN. AROUND.

2. DO NOT GO WADING THROUGH THE WATER. EVEN IF YOU JUST WANT TO SEE HOW DEEP IT IS. THAT. WATER. IS. CONTAMINATED.

3. IT IS CALLED FLASH FLOODING FOR A REASON. THE WATER RISES AND SURGES IN A FLASH. STAY. HOME.

4. If you're at risk of flooding, raise up any of your belongings now. Put the legs of tall things in buckets. Know where your important documents are.

5. Stay safe.

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listen the only lifehack you'll ever need is to leave at least one unimportant piece of mail in your mailbox at all times so you'll always have an excuse to go outside and be nosy when there are happenings afoot that need investigation

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How’d you and ran decide to move in together?

Every twink needs their twink handler.

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I think that for every episode of bake off that has a foreign country as a theme there should be a special third judge that is just a grandma of that nationality and they should be equipped with an air horn they can toot in paul hollywood’s smug face whenever he confidently says something completely incorrect about a bake’s construction, flavour, texture, etc etc

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Obviously my first magical girl sallys were made pretty fast and I had been mostly focusing on doing patterns and colors without as much regard for the shape of the outfit so I've been working on some additional sketches as seen above.

design details under cut

Here's my earlier design:

I originally had both the bat skulls on the head and bat wings + a thread/needle/spiderweb design going on. I'm leaning towards one or the other rn.

I was actually struggling a lot with where to go, I'm not the *best* at making magical girl designs, so I went on dolldivine.com and played with a few character creators to get a feel for the magical girl clothing genre:

i was going to wait until i had something more final to post but somehow just drawing these like. 2 designs was so tiring! a surprising amount of thinking went into this!

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what's with the weird glorification of smoking that's come back lately

like

I've seen so many posts that paint opposing smoking as some impossibly Loser-ish or puritanical stance and I really don't get it

it makes you, your house, and your clothing stink, destroys your teeth, and gives you lung cancer. opposing it is. Correct. obviously addiction is very complicated and quitting can be hard, but just saying "smoking is gross and harmful as a practice (including vaping)" is True and Right actually

some of you have never grown up hearing about how some beloved family member died a slow, agonized, wasting death of smoking-induced cancer, or watching it firsthand for yourself, and it shows

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are you gen z?

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currently maybe possibly single-handedly crashing whatever servers eton hosts its archived student newspapers on because me and a friend are getting obsessed with a single outspoken prefect from 1883

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“Well, I have said this in the past, so I hope i don’t bore you by repeating it, but I think that we live or die under the tyranny of perfection. Socially, we are pushed towards being perfect. Physically, beautiful to conform to standards that are cruel and uncommon, to behave and lead our lives in a certain way, to demonstrate to the world that we are happy and healthy and all full of sunshine. We are told to always smile and never sweat, by multiple commercials of shampoo or beer. And I feel that the most achievable goal of our lives is to have the freedom that imperfection gives us. And there is no better patron saint of imperfection than a monster. We will try really hard to be angels, but I think that a balanced, sane life is to accept the monstrosity in ourselves and others as part of what being human is. Imperfection, the acceptance of imperfection, leads to tolerance and liberates us from social models that I find horrible and oppressive.”

— Guillermo del Toro, on why he has always been intrigued by monsters [x] (via radiophile)

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Let’s Have Another Bullet Point Story, Courtesy of a Friend

So I have a friend that used to be in the tumblers troupe at the renfaire as a contortionist

We were chatting online and she told me to tell you all this story.

I love Kat dearly

but she forgets that she’s stupid strong and hypermobile

so one day she throws her back out

bad enough that she needed painkillers and couldn’t stand upright

“But also I needed Tampons and like.  A Burrito, real bad.”

she’s flat on her back in her apartment when she decides this

and, in an

impeccable

leap of reasoning, decides

“I can’t roll my back forward to sit/stand up like normal.

But I can ARCH my back just fine.

SO 

I’m going to do that and get on my hands and feet in a stomach-in-the-air this-shit-belongs-in-a-horror-movie-type pose,

And amble on down to the 7-11”

“And get me that Burrito”

It is, 

for context, 

after midnight in July during a wildfire so it’s hot as satan’s own asshole and the moon is red and shit’s already generally cursed.

Imagineyou are some poor sap working nights at the world’s deadest 7-11, and you hear the door jangle but you don’t see anyone’s head over the counters.

Whatever.

Except you keep hearing noises like there’s someone in the next aisle over.  

Fucking around in the burrito section

It’s also worth mentioning that Kat

1. sings whatever earworm is currently running through her head when she’s not paying attention

2. sounds EXACTLY like some kind of creepy child from a horror movie when doing so

tonight’s song is something from veggietales.

DUDE ACTUALLY STANDS HIS GROUND

and/or is really fucking high and isn’t sure if he’s tripping balls or notanyway

Kat goes up to pay for her burrito and tampons

She realizes the counter presents something of a challenge, and then demonstrates for me on her kitchen table at 4AM during a different july wildfire, 

exactly 

how she used the shelves to climb up the counter 

like one of the boston robotics beasties

dude stares at her for like, five minutes and says.

“Register’s broke.”

“Oh No!” Says Kat. “Just Take ‘em.” “Really?  I can leave cash-you don’t have to give me change I don’t want you to get in trouble with your manager.” “…Nah.” “Oh!  OK!  Thank you!” “Yeah ok bye.”

Shortly after she arrived back at the apartment, she got a text on her phone from the campus security about  "A Suspicious Individual” at tle 7-11. 

It took her 

FOUR

FUCKING 

YEARS

 to realize she was the suspicious individual

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I was going through old episodes and was going to gif this, but....it's just not the same without being able to hear Brennan yell, "TITTIES!" So, video.

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would anybody be interested if I made a school website for Hatchetfield High

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Reblog if you stand against order, civilization, and goodness itself

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has anybody else seen the bit in tommy's new video yet. where he asks mumbo jumbo if he can revive technoblade with redstone. bc that actually made my jaw DROP hol yshit. the pause just before he says it. you can hear the gears turning in phil's head as he realizes what tommy's about to say. the immediate psychic damage. truly horrid thank you tommy. ik techno would be losing it over that joke

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Sleeping Beauty AU where the princess was born on a Leap Day, so when the evil fairy curses her to prick her finger “on her 16th birthday”, her family realizes that’s not the same thing as her 16th year of life and she’ll actually be in her 60′s when it happens.

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You've talked before about how you seem to be very approachable and are always approached at supermarkets and stuff by people asking for help. So I want to share what I've been experiencing the last few days.

Now, to preface this, I don't have that same problem, I'm tall, so I semi regularly get people asking me to grab stuff from high shelves, but otherwise people do not ask me for help in the ways they seem to ask you. But, the last few days, I've been doing trial shifts at my local supermarket. Because I was only on trial, I wasn't given a uniform at all, so I was just in my regular clothes. But I was going in and out of the back and pushing carts and stuff with stock on them, so I was clearly doing like work there.

This though, seemed to massively confused some people, I'd be out the back grabbing whatever needed stocking, then I'd push through the swinging doors to go to where I needed to, and I'd see someone look up, clearly looking to ask about whether the shop sells something or where something was or whatever, then they'd like take a look at me and see that I wasn't in uniform, and that would give them pause. But since I was obviously doing some sort of official thing, they'd come up and ask me whatever they wanted to know, but since I'd only been working there for like 12 hours, I don't know where anything is and have no easy way to check.

So I'd be apologetic but tell them that I didn't know, and as I was turning to get on with whatever I was doing, I could just see them trying to piece together what it was I was doing, whether I was just some randomer who decided to do the people at the stores work for them, or whether I was actually meant to be doing it, and as someone who enjoys being slightly confusing to people, I was loving it.

*touches glass* my mirror image

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most important thing to remember about being a woman is if youre married you have to go under the covers with your husband and laugh cutely and play wrestle so when you die to progress the narrative he can remember it in slow motion montages