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All Our Yesterdays

by Jorge Luis Borges tr. Robert Mezey

I need to know who lays claim to my past. Who, of all those I was? The Geneva boy Who learned some Latin hexameters with joy, Lines that the years and decades have erased? That child who searched his father’s library for Exact details, the round-cheeked cherub storms Of the old maps, or else the savage forms That are the panther and the jaguar? Or the one who opened a door and looked upon A man as he lay drawing his last breath, Leaving forever, and kissed in the white dawn The face that stiffens away, the face in death? I am those that are no more. For no good reason I am, in the evening sun, those vanished persons.

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In a Time of Peace

by Ilya Kaminsky

Inhabitant of earth for forty something years I once found myself in a peaceful country. I watch neighbors open

their phones to watch a cop demanding a man’s driver’s license. When a man reaches for his wallet, the cop shoots. Into the car window. Shoots.

It is a peaceful country.

We pocket our phones and go. To the dentist, to buy shampoo, pick up the children from school, get basil.

Ours is a country in which a boy shot by police lies on the pavement for hours.

We see in his open mouth the nakedness of the whole nation.

We watch. Watch others watch.

The body of a boy lies on the pavement exactly like the body of a boy.

It is a peaceful country.

And it clips our citizens’ bodies effortlessly, the way the President’s wife trims her toenails.

All of us still have to do the hard work of dentist appointments, of remembering to make a summer salad: basil, tomatoes, it is a joy, tomatoes, add a little salt.

This is a time of peace.

I do not hear gunshots, but watch birds splash over the backyards of the suburbs. How bright is the sky as the avenue spins on its axis. How bright is the sky (forgive me) how bright.

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Requiem

by Robert Louis Stevenson

Under the wide and starry sky Dig the grave and let me lie. Glad did I live and gladly die, And I laid me down with a will.

This be the verse you grave for me; Here he lies where he longed to be, Home is the sailor, home from the sea, And the hunter home from the hill.

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You never promised to come

Yet I see you in my balancing act

Of familiarity and the foreseen unfamiliar

You’re the subject of my hope

But all hope is a selfish pursuit–

The drowning woman’s plank

Even when her body decays

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

The woman survives

And you the onlooker just looks on

It is the season of your exploit;

Here he exploits my love upborne

You were the majestic paragon

Here he gambles my grace

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

But the woman learns to swim

She gets out of the water

Oh harbinger you saw but

You never warned

You stood but you never stood up

There he made a mockery of me

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

But when the woman learned to swim

You flew again for me

Harbinger of the mariner

I stood and ran for life

There he clutched and clawed my skin

But you were not in sight

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

When the woman learned to swim

You flew again for me

But I had wings and I could fly

The sea is deep–

Murderous waters, endless views

There he fragmented my sinews

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

The woman learned to swim

You flew oh harbinger

But I had wings too

And my hope was only me

The words have come back

Amidst this dark sea

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

The woman swims on

You fly to the sea

I have my wings to fly

I am my only hope

My only hope me is

There he was a creature wicked

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

The woman swam across the sea

The bird flew away

I spread my wings

I kissed this hope

I was my only hope

I am my only hope

My only hope is me

Water water everywhere

Not a drop to drink

The woman swam across the sea

The bird flew away

I flew to meet my god

The god in me, my hope

I kissed this hope

My hope has been but me

My hope has been but me

[vittyviperfromvioletland]

They Sit Together on the Porch

BY WENDELL BERRY

They sit together on the porch, the dark

Almost fallen, the house behind them dark.

Their supper done with, they have washed and dried

The dishes–only two plates now, two glasses,

Two knives, two forks, two spoons–small work for two.

She sits with her hands folded in her lap,

At rest. He smokes his pipe. They do not speak,

And when they speak at last it is to say

What each one knows the other knows. They have

One mind between them, now, that finally

For all its knowing will not exactly know

Which one goes first through the dark doorway, bidding

Goodnight, and which sits on a while alone.

⑉ ◇ ✦ ✧ ✦ ◇ ⑉

via the poetryfoundation.org.

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 Andrea Gibson, You Better Be Lightning

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I dreamt the nice one, the eternal, I dreamt he messaged me. I don’t remember what. But we met and we hugged.

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“Life is short but you have time. All that you’ll ever need is buried there beneath your ribs just like an apple seed. Things grow, you’ll grow, and time will watch, and love you all the more. You were not made to dread the clock, you are what clocks are for.”

— Ellis Nightingale

We assume others show love the same way we do — and if they don't, we worry it's not there.

~ Amy Przewosky

“How evanescent those loves and friendships seem at this distance in time … We move on, make new attachments. We grow old. But sometimes, we hanker for old friendships, the old loves. Sometimes I wish I was young again. Or that I could travel back in time and pick up the threads. Absent so long, I may have stopped loving you, friends; but I will never stop loving the Day I loved you.”

~ Ruskin Bond

"And in the end, we were all just humans...

drunk on the idea that love,

only love, can heal our brokenness."

~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

here’s your reminder

to never become that person

with broken dreams,

stuck in a passionless job,

and living a mundane life;

you can do so much better than that,

become someone that you thought

you could only hope to be.

-j.g. edge

you and i, we are binary stars because you make me feel so safe within your orbit or maybe i am an astronaut, getting lost on purpose and accidentally and you're an alien, always showing me the way and watching as i make my own discoveries either way you have been there through it all you were there

when i was burnt by the surface of the sun, and you were the star that numbed the pain when i have skated across saturn's rings, and you held my hand, making sure i would not fall when undiscovered planets became my escape, and you found my hiding places each and every time i have gotten lost within black holes, only to have you pull me back out and those mysterious heart-shaped craters on the surface of Mars were drawn by me, while thinking about you

you and i -- we watched flowers grow, and sunrises and sunsets we watched the death of stars and the loss of moons through it all, both beautiful and horrible and the things in between i could turn and see you right by my side there are more stars in the sky than i could even begin to fathom they swirl together, creating colorful formations and dizzying sights

but they can't hold a candle to the constellations that linger on your skin

across your cheeks and around your stomach; along your thighs and in your eyes the cluster of galaxies within your chest shine brighter than orion's belt

instead of the north star, i look to you to find my way home and i just know that pluto wouldn't be so cold if i had you by my side

Anonymous said: Write something for a friend who's been with you through your thick and thins please?

(cc, 2017)

(SAVED IN NOTES 10/12/2021)

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I taught him to cook

I helped him study research papers

He’ll do all of this for someone else and become a better man for someone else. He will become the man he never was to me. It’s the loss of all the better possibilities and it’s so fucking sad.

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I feel so sad thinking about him and the life we had and now I’m moving countries to start a new life

But it will all be so painfully lonely

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Even after he did all of that, I miss him and the future we had dreamt of

I’m going insane

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The abusive language

-on farewell

-during exam

-messages promiscuous he called me

Behaviour during Harmony

-can’t feel any connection with me

-kind of slapped me

-got angry and made me cry

-ignored my failing health

-did not prioritise me

-used bumble hinge tinder

-talked with girls

-threw stuff around because of food

-2024 May exams violently tried to make me not study

-on several occasions forced me to get out of the house

-on several occasions held me in a wrong manner

-left me crying all night on several occasions

-would block me without any reason

-threaten to break up when I didn’t want to do his assignment

-called my sisters bad

-always brought up my character; slut shamed me

-during special occasions, always got angry for no reason, farewell, birthdays

-threatened to throw my stuff from the third floor on several occasions

-made me feel guilty about sexual harassment I faced

-kept me from talking to my old friends whom he didn’t like

I FUCKING NURSED THIS PERSON TO GOOD HEALTH. I FUCKING SAT THE WHOLE NIGHT THROUGH TRYING TO BREAK HIS FEVER. THIS IS WHAT I GOT.

WHAT MORE DO I NEED TO LEAVE HIM?

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I’m trying to get out of an abusive relationship but I end up going back to him again and again even when he’s not good to me. He says he’s trying but he repeats the same behaviour.

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It’s good to love from a distance

If love at all

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spotify is raising prices again here's the apk that gives you premium for free

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the blessing of lovelessness—

wisława szymborska / marina tsvetaeva / dunya mikhail / margaret atwood