wodnes--coyotl - Tumblr blog

[wodnes--coyotl]

getting tested for POTS today!!!!!!!

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Buster Keaton SERVING while serving

The Cook (1918)

[wodnes--coyotl]

This is how I felt about my father dying of cancer. He was a great lover of life and never wanted to die. He eventually accepted it, although he really was worried about us and his house and so on,...ha. He trusted me to safeguard his dignity and to see him off into the next life, and I did. He didn't trust me often, but he wanted me there. I was the last person he heard.

He loved Boston Legal and we joked about it before he died because it's such an unlikely show for someone like me to watch. When I had covid (unbeknownst to me) once we returned, we binge watched BL - a window into another time in American history, my favorite actor, one of my dads favorite actors (also unbeknownst to me), and also weirdly relevant episodes back to back to back. It was a weird, sometimes disturbing, comfort...after someone's death.

"My best friend has Alzheimer's... He is a grand lover of life, and will be for some time. I believe even when his mind starts to really go he'll still fish, he'll laugh and love. And as it progresses, he'll still want to live—because there'll be value for him in a friendship, in a cigar. The truth is, I don't think he'll ever come to me and say, 'This is the day I want to die.'

"But the day is coming. And he won't know it. This is perhaps the most insidious thing about Alzheimer's. But you see, he trusts me to know when that day has arrived. He trusts me to safeguard his dignity, his legacy and self-respect. He trusts me to prevent his end from becoming a mindless piece of mush. And I will. It will be an unbearably painful thing for me—but I will do it because I love him. I will end his suffering. Because it's the only decent, humane, and loving thing a person can do."

BOSTON LEGAL 4.16 "The Mighty Rogues"

[wodnes--coyotl]

Ten of Crows. Art by ​Abigail Larson, from The Alleyway Tarot.

[wodnes--coyotl]

out of context this could be a goth rap in 2024

yeah

[wodnes--coyotl]

Reblog to give prev a magical amulet that protects them from headache

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getting mildly suicidal thinking abt grief listening to music and trying to get out of this hole

[wodnes--coyotl]

They Live 1988, John Carpenter

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choices made in anger is such a crazy image. if you know what i'm talking about

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“You can't drive around and hear your favorite song / So you tape it live if you can get inside when it comes along / I can't stand people who bitch and whine / Let’s drink a beer from a paper bag while we got time / Bang, bang let the music go bang! / Brilliant, shining and nasty/ Bang, bang make the music go bang! / Let me hear a guitar sound like a train …”

/ Lyrics by Exene Cervenka and John Doe /

“This furious, fuzz-amped tear through the lives of the underclass and the willfully decadent comes close to justifying every extravagant claim ever made for this Los Angeles band. Without closing their eyes to the grief around them, X has supplanted the melancholia of Under the Big Black Sun with a firm determination to have fun. More Fun in the New World, the group's fourth LP, is an album of keen observations and vibrantly played music whose breadth and compassion may finally win X the audience they deserve … it shows that X, like the punk movement that spawned them, isn't some pop-hating musical aberration. They're a proud part of rock & roll, and More Fun in the New World can only enhance their growing reputation.”

/ Christopher Connelly reviewing More Fun in the New World by X in the October 1983 issue of Rolling Stone magazine /

Released forty years ago this month (September 1983): More Fun in the New World, the ferocious fourth album by definitive Los Angeles punk band X. Pictured: X frontwoman Exene Cervenka photographed by Ken Andersson.

[wodnes--coyotl]

A young caribou (Rangifer tarandus) skeleton, picked clean, appears frozen in the moment of death on the tundra. The position of this carcass makes it seem like the animal died of starvation or exposure in a cold and difficult landscape.

[wodnes--coyotl]

Unattributed 14th century Italian, (detail)

[wodnes--coyotl]

Its good that i have a blog now cuz I used to write all this bullshit down physically in a diary and my mom found mine and read it when i was 15 and i got in so much trouble cuz i drew goku with a boner so foreboding frightening it cleaved his jorts clean in half down the crotch seam and she threw it in a dumpster but then i crawled inside and retrieved it in the dark of night to preserve the archives of my mind but I lost it the very next day cuz i dropped it into the wave pool at Wild Wild n Wet (waterpark). Nowadays relying on digital spaces we have no guarantee of our eras information being preserved for futture generations tho and as the lights go out The silence will be suffocating and we will all be boner goku at the bottom of the wave pool at Wild Wild and Wet lowkey so u might as well start an nsfw twitter with ur government name and credit card info in bio tbh

[wodnes--coyotl]

matins, louise glück

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Townes

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calling every instance of showing certain emotions "emotional labor" needs to stop. I just saw a post that was like "reminder that you do not ever need to be a good or kind person" like. Yes you DO???

[wodnes--coyotl]

weird how many nights ive laid awake thinking abt my mom

somehow i have less to think abt dad despite knowing him more. maybe less unknowns

thinking abt how theyre both gone

thinking abt how a few years ago i didnt think theyd all die at once

both of em and gene

what a whiplash four years

i feel so empty inside