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[yourmidnightlover]

literally BINGE READ RN IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY BC OHHHHHH MY LANTA

jealousy & flirtation

NINE: SAUDADE

18+

Juniper's threat looms in your mind, your time with Bucky slowly running out. An old face returns to campus, and she's looking for revenge.

Content Warning: Frat!Bucky x Fem!Reader, mature themes, blackmail, Juniper continues to be a horrific person, still a lot of angst but things are looking up I swear

Series Masterlist

"Saudade. The love that remains. A desire for that which cannot or no longer exists. Memories of the beach you played on as a child. A friend no longer living. A lost lover. Saudade."

Grant steps to the side after his short speech, revealing the finished painting to Professor Linum and the rest of the class. You sit firmly in your seat, trying to ignore Bucky's hand clasping yours.

The painting is beautiful, you have to admit. Something of a semi-abstract landscape of a cliff overlooking the ocean. In Maria's bottom right corner, an unused lighthouse. Grant's top left of the cliff shows a broken gravestone. Bucky's top right is a gorgeous blend of dull blues; the ocean with a wave reaching out to an empty beach. Your bottom left corner; a lonely dove in the foreground reaching out to nothing, though its white wing looks to be reaching for the blue waves.

The light applause from the class is accompanied by a small smile and nod from Linum. Knowing how hard he is to please, you know to take his reaction as a glowing review. That's one less thing to worry about as your final semester comes to a close.

"Hey, you with me?"

Bucky's words pull you from your thoughts, and you realize you're the last two left in the room. Looking up at him, you give him a small smile.

"Hungry?" He asks while packing up your bag for you. "Let me take you for lunch. It's about time I took you on a real date."

Though Happy's Diner isn't the epitome of fine dining, anywhere with Bucky would be the perfect date. You try to keep the echoes of Juniper's threat out of your head, but they keep creeping up in the back of your mind, reminding you that your time with him is limited.

"It's kinda crazy that it took until the end of our college careers for us to get together," Bucky says, taking the half-eaten onion ring from your outstretched hand. "I guess I should've grown some balls earlier, huh?"

Deciding to live in delusion, you pretend as though Juniper doesn't exist.

"I mean, it wasn't for my lack of trying," You admit. "I distinctly remember you rejecting me when I asked you out in freshman year."

Taken aback, Bucky casts his mind back. Your hair was wildly different back then, so it takes him a few seconds to recall the memory before it clicks. "Right. I did, didn't I?" He mutters, letting out a soft laugh. "But I had a good excuse. I was seeing someone."

This time, you have to cast your mind back. Though you were crushing on him hard, you didn't exactly keep tabs on his dating life, and assumed he was single for the past four years. Then, it springs into your mind. There was a girl he briefly dated - some red-head who just disappeared. Maybe Juniper killed her.

"I always thought you were cute," Bucky tells you honestly. "In fact, Steve had been pushing me to ask you out all year before we got together."

"That makes me feel slightly better," You tell him before lifting up your burger and taking a bite. Part of you wants to pry and find out how his last relationship ended - and whether Juniper was involved in its demise - but this could be your last meal with him, so you'd prefer to keep the topic off of his crazy best friend.

"But I'm glad we happened when we did," Bucky admits. "Otherwise, we might not be sitting here together right now. And that would suck. Want the last mozzarella stick?"

He's sweet. You can tell that he's a softie who'd never intentionally hurt you. If you told him the entire truth of your past, he'd surely understand why you did what you did. Then, you could tell him about Juniper blackmailing you with the information, and he'd realize she's crazy and the two of you could fly off to somewhere that isn't Cabo for the summer.

Right. Just do it. She'll probably tell him the truth whether you break up with him or not, so what's the harm?

"Bucky," You find yourself saying without thinking first. "Do you trust me?"

He blinks, surprised by your question. Though you haven't been seeing each other for very long, and there was the slight blip when you tore his heart out, Bucky likes to think he knows you well. He knows who you are. He sees the way you shy away from his compliments, no matter how confident you usually are. He notices the secret smile you try to hide from him after sex. How tightly you hold onto him when you're laying in bed. The kisses you give his cheek when you think he's asleep.

But he also remembers the way it hurt when you dropped him like it was nothing. He knows you like him the way he likes you, but does he truly believe you'll never leave him again like you did before? Especially when you leave college, and he's no longer a convenient option for you?

"I don't know," He finally admits, though it hurts him to say it.

You nod, knowing you deserve that. It isn't like you've been entirely truthful with him this whole time, so why should he trust you?

Taking in a deep breath, you prepare yourself to spill the truth. You're sick of lying and Juniper doesn't deserve to be protected. It's her fault he doesn't trust you, and it's about time he found out what she's really like.

"I need to tell you something, Bucky," You begin, reaching out to hold his hand. "I have to warn you, it's a lot. I'm not sure if you'll even believe me, but I want to tell you anyway. I understand if you don't wanna keep seeing me once you hear this."

Bucky feels his stomach churn. He has no idea where this is coming from or what you're talking about, but his mind races with a million different scenarios. Please, don't be breaking up with me again.

"It's about-"

"Juniper?"

You look up at him. "Actually, yes." You frown when you see him looking behind you and turn your head to see none other than Juniper rushing into the diner, a look of terror on her face.

"Jamie!" She calls out, running over. You expect her to give you a glare, but she doesn't even notice you sitting there. Whatever it is must be really scaring her.

"What's wrong?" Bucky asks her, concern on his face. "What is it?"

"It's her," Juniper says breathlessly. "She's back."

"Who?" He questions, utterly confused as he narrows his eyes.

"That crazy bitch!" She exclaims, her cheeks flushed. "Wren fucking Wragley!"

"Are you being serious?" Wanda asks, rage in her eyes.

"I couldn't help it; I wanted to visit the bakery," Wren explains sheepishly. "What were the chances that the cunt would be there and see me?"

Wanda turns her cold gaze to Yelena. "I told you to keep her here," She reminds her curtly. "You've fucked the whole plan up!"

A pang of hurt hits Yelena as she steps back, almost pouting. "It isn't my fault, I tried to make her stay-"

"Well, you failed," Wanda cuts in before rubbing her forehead. "Fuck's sake. She's gonna run straight to Bucky and tell him."

Yelena shrinks backwards, angry at herself for messing up. There's no way Wanda will be interested in her now. "Don't worry, Wan, I'm sure we can figure something out," Steve assures her from his seat on the couch. "We just need to alter the plan a little."

"Maybe Juniper will think she was hallucinating?" Thor offers.

"Yeah, right," Wanda mumbles.

"Wait," Yelena starts, determined to prove herself to Wanda. "We can still do this."

"How?" Wanda asks with a frown.

"Let's stop over complicating things and just do this the old-fashioned way," Yelena suggests. "Let's confront her."

"We've lost the weight of Wren's reveal, though, so she'll be prepared," Wanda points out. "She just witnessed her scoffing a powdered donut."

Wren wipes the corner of her mouth subconsciously while Yelena walks over to Wanda. "Look, Juniper ran off as soon as she saw Wren, right?" Yelena points out. "She's scared. Somewhere in her mind is the truth of what happened, and Juniper isn't a total sociopath - she must feel some guilt, somewhere in that twisted head of hers."

"You'd be surprised," Wren mutters bitterly.

"This is the girl who stabbed herself just so she could frame someone else," Thor reminds Yelena.

Wanda remains silent, frowning at Yelena with her arms folded across her chest.

"I know she's insane, but she's still human," Yelena insists. "Even if she doesn't feel guilt, it's safe to say she has enough emotions to be madly in love with Bucky. That means the thought of losing him would terrify her."

"That was our original plan - make her think Wren and Bucky are reuniting to scare her into doing something crazy in front of him," Wanda says bluntly. "A plan we can no longer do now that Juniper's seen Wren and is probably telling Bucky as we speak."

"You're right. We can't do the plan how we originally intended," Yelena says, a glint of excitement in her eyes. "But the truth is Juniper's worst enemy. And the truth always comes out."

Wanda still says nothing, her eyes firmly on Yelena, waiting for her to make sense. Praying that she doesn't let her down.

"Maybe in Disney movies," Steve mutters bitterly.

"Hold on, Yelena might be onto something," Wren says, folding her arms across her chest as a look of deep though grows on her face. "I should just talk to her. To Juniper. She was terrified when she saw me earlier, so she'll be on edge. People on the edge are more likely to mess up."

"More likely to admit the truth," Yelena adds with an excited smile. "And we can make sure someone's recording the entire thing."

Thor's face lights up. "Yes!"

"The old-fashioned, soap opera way," Steve says, nodding. "I like it."

Slowly, Wanda smiles. "Let's do it," She decides. "Let's destroy Juniper Johnson."

"Are you sure it was her?" Bucky asks Juniper, who is now sitting next to him.

"I saw her with my own eyes!" She exclaims, still on edge. "Her face is full of plastic now, but it was her. I know it was."

"And... who is she?" You wonder, admittedly enjoying seeing Juniper so out of sorts. Whoever this Wren is, you already respect the hell out of her.

Bucky looks over at you, a pained look in his eyes. "My ex," He tells you.

Ah. The red-head who disappeared.

Juniper glares at you. "Why the fuck are you still here?" She bursts, unable to stop herself.

"Watch it, Juniper," Bucky says sternly, giving her a glare.

Her face drops and she sinks down in her seat. "Sorry... I'm just stressed, Jamie," She says quietly, looking down.

He lets out a sigh, rubbing his forehead. "Look, whatever her reason is for being on campus, I'm sure it has nothing to do with us," He says. "It's been years, June. Maybe she decided to re-enroll, I don't know. How about you go home and relax, get some rest?"

Offended that he's basically telling her to fuck off, Juniper scoffs before turning her attention back to you. "You know, it's almost been a week since I last saw you," She tells you cryptically, but you know what she's implying. Your time's almost up.

Sick of her having the upper hand, you roll your eyes, which pisses her off even further.

"Jamie, do you know the truth about her?" She asks him suddenly.

Confused, Bucky frowns. "Uh... what? About Y/N?"

"She's a murderer," She spills, getting the attention of the people in the booth behind her. Your heart races and you feel nauseous.

Bucky just laughs, raising a brow. "Alright, I think you've been watching too many true crime documentaries," He says lightly. "Go home, Junie."

"No, it's true!" She cries before looking at you with a wild look in her eyes. "Tell him!"

Stunned, you say nothing.

"You're being crazy, Juniper," Bucky says curtly, losing his patience. "I think you should leave."

"I'm not the crazy one; she is!" She yells, lowering her voice when she receives a glare from a server. "Do you know what her first job was, Jamie? She was a runner for a drug dealer - and she killed someone she was selling to-"

"I dont know what the fuck is going on with you, Juniper, but we aren't doing this here," Bucky cuts her off coldly. "You need to calm down."

"It's true," You utter.

His head turns to you, his eyes softening but still tinged with confusion. "What?"

"It's all true," You confirm, feeling numb. "All of it."

With that, you stand up and run out, afraid you'll pass out if you stay there any longer. You want him to follow you out, your dove desperately reaching out for his waves to join you, but they don't.

"All we have to do is get Y/N up to speed," Yelena says, taking out her phone. "Let me find out where she is."

Just as she finds your name on her contact list, you yourself rush into the apartment, tears streaming down your face. You stop in your tracks when you see Thor and Steve sitting on the couch, Wanda standing behind them, Yelena by the coffee table, and is that-

"You're Bucky's ex," You say to the gorgeous redhead in the middle your living room. "What- what are you all doing here?"

A silence falls in the room as everyone waits for someone else to speak up. Thor stands up and slowly makes his way over to you, like a zookeeper cautiously approaching a hungry lion. "Hi," He begins softly. "Uh... there's a lot we need to tell you."

Wiping the tears from your face, you frown, utterly baffled at the situation. "Is this an intervention?" You wonder as they all stare at you.

"Hi. I'm Wren," The redhead introduces herself with a warm smile. "Um, you're right- I am Bucky's ex. Your friends here came to see me, and to bring me here to-"

"You brought Bucky's ex back to campus?" You ask Yelena, confused and slightly hurt that she's been doing God knows what behind your back. "Why?"

"It's not like that," Yelena quickly clarifies, rushing over to you. "She isn't here to get back with him."

"Well, we'll see," Wren mutters, causing everyone's heads to turn rapidly to her. "What?" She asks innocently. "I haven't seen him in a long time. It didn't end because either of us wanted it to - there may still be potential for-"

"Shut the fuck up," Yelena cuts her off coldly before turning back to you. "Ignore her - she isn't here for Bucky. She's here for Juniper."

The mention of her makes you roll your eyes. "I am so fucking sick of Juniper damn Johnson," You huff, running your hands through your hair.

"So are we," Wanda tells you as she walks over. "Which is why - and is only why - Wren's here. She dated Bucky back in freshman year, and Juniper fucked everything up because of how in love with him she was. Is."

Taken aback, you look over at Steve. "You... you guys know about Juniper?" You ask lowly. "You know what she's really like?"

"Yes," Wren says bitterly. "Unfortunately, yes. And from what I've heard, she's still just as deranged as she was back then, so I'm here to help make Bucky realize the truth. Juniper's had her fun, and now it's time for her to meet karma."

"This is a lot to process," You mumble, walking over to the couch and collapsing down onto it next to Steve. On one hand, it's a relief to hear that they've seen Juniper's true colors and plan to take her down, but on the other hand, you think you might have already lost Bucky, anyway. Sure, it would be nice to expose Juniper, but losing Bucky makes it all futile. You haven't even begun to think of the painfully gorgeous Wren - what if he wants her back? He doesn't even trust you, so it's likely he'd rather get back with her than stay with you. "This is too much," You mumble, hiding your face in your hands. "I- this is too much."

Thor rushes over to you and carefully peels one of your hands away from your face before holding it tight, giving you a nod, and pulling you up to your feet. He walks you into the kitchen, where he sits you down on a stool.

"What is happening, Thor?" You ask, fresh tears falling from your eyes. "I just want Bucky. Juniper's ruined everything."

"Shh, it's okay, darling," He assures you, hugging you tightly. "We're gonna sort this whole fucked up situation out, I promise."

"It's not just her," You whisper. "Him finding out that Juniper's evil won't fix it. He... knows about me."

Thor frowns, pulling back. "What do you mean?"

You sniffle, wiping your face. "Juniper found out about my childhood. About what happened when I was a teenager," You tell him, looking down. "She told Bucky. He knows what I am."

"What you are? Y/N, what happened when you were sixteen does not define who you are," Thor says sternly. "Does he know all the details? Huh? That it was self defence?"

"It doesn't matter," You cry. "He won't want to be with someone with such an ugly past. He's used to nice things, and I'm not. He went to fucking private school, and I had to sell drugs just so I could feed myself. We don't fit together, Thor. Maybe I was stupid for thinking I could pretend I was worth his time and hope he wouldn't figure out the truth. No. Even when this is all over, even when he finds out what Juniper's really like... it'll probably just make him want Wren again."

From the doorway, Yelena lets out a shaky sigh, tears threatening to fall from her own eyes. She always gets upset whenever your past is brought up, being such a sensitive soul. "How could you say that?" She asks you, her voice wavering. "You're so special, Y/N."

"Stop," You mumble, not in the mood to be cheered up.

"No, I won't," She says firmly, walking over to you. "You're such an amazing person. Despite everything you've been through, you're so beautiful and kind and lovely. Anyone else would be bitter and angry at the world, but you gave yourself a fresh start. You're smart, and funny, and if he can't see past the childhood you had no choice but to live through, then he doesn't deserve you."

By now, all three of you are crying, and Thor pulls you both in for a tight hug. He holds you for a few moments, gently rubbing your back.

"We have a plan," Yelena tells you lowly once you pull away. "We're gonna fix this."

You nod, sniffling, not entirely sure you believe that this is even fixable. "Okay."

"Juniper's gotten away with hurting people for too long," Thor states, squeezing your hand. "It's time we put an end to it."

Juniper stares at Bucky with her hand on his and her eyes wide. Neither of them say a word. They're still in the diner, and Bucky has a shell-shocked look on his face.

"I know it's a lot to take in, Jamie," Juniper says, her voice soft. "It sucks when the people you care about turn out to be complete frauds. I'm sorry."

Slowly, he turns to look at her, an unreadable expression on his face.

"I'm just glad I found out when I did," She says, stroking his hand. "I mean, can you imagine if you actually carried on dating her? Like, fell in love with her?"

Remaining silent, Bucky just stares back at her.

"Good thing you have me," She chirps, trying to lighten the mood. "And you'll always have me, Jamie."

Having had enough, Bucky pulls his hand out from under hers. He takes in a deep breath, collecting his thoughts before finally saying, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Juniper's eyes widen. She recognizes his tone and the look in his face, but she is most definitely not familiar with it. Sure, there have been times when he's been annoyed at something she's said and done, but anger? That's an emotion he reserves for other people. People that aren't Juniper Johnson.

"What?" She squeaks, her heart thudding in her chest.

The cold look in his eyes doesn't get any warmer. "I don't even know where to begin," He utters lowly. "You did a background check on my girlfriend?"

"That was for your safety-"

"And then, when you found something traumatic she had been through, you don't ask her about it - which you shouldn't have done anyway as it's none of your business - you come and tell me - no, scream about it, right in front of her, when it's clearly a sensitive topic?" Bucky's speaking calmly, but there's an edge to his words. It's as though he's trying to figure it out - why Juniper would act so cruelly.

Stunned, Juniper lets out a quick breath. "Jamie, I was just worried about you," She claims, her voice much softer than when she was yelling about you being a murderer.

"No, Juniper, you were being a bully," He states firmly. "I saw the look on your face. You were enjoying it."

"Don't be so crude!" She exclaims, moving away from him. "I can't have you being around people like that, James. She's dangerous-"

"It would've happened before college, whatever it was. So she was a kid," Bucky says, his heart breaking for you even without knowing the full context of what you went through.

"I... I didn't think about that," Juniper says, quickly realizing she needs to change her tactics. "Oh, I'm sorry, Jamie. That... must've been really traumatizing for her. I didn't think."

"No, you didn't," He says, standing up.

"Where are you going?" She asks, concern in her eyes.

"I need to find her," Bucky tells her firmly. "Look, just go home. First you think you saw Wren, and now this... just get some rest, or something."

"Jamie, please!" Juniper begs while grabbing his arm, unable to let him walk away when he's upset with her. He's never upset with her. "I refuse to let her come between us - don't let her affect our friendship!"

Frustrated and at the end of his tether, he harshly pulls his arm out of her grip. "Leave me the fuck alone," He spits before storming out of the diner.

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[yourmidnightlover]

i am ITCHING for the next part ALREADY!! it’s SO GOOD

Art and Ice - Doodle

Pairing: Eventual Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Characters: Natasha, Wanda, Pietro, Loki, Bucky, Sam Wilson, Clint Barton, a lot of the avengers cast is mentioned.

Summery: MC asks Bucky to be her focus on her project.

This might a 2 or 3 parter (it's gonna be more because cannot help myself). College AU, our boy Bucky is on the hockey team, and reader is an art major (because I love that trope and couldn't help myself)

Warnings: Not beta'd! All mistakes are my own. Friends fluff, swearing, mentions of college students being college students. Bit of friendly harmless flirting between friends. Bucky is a playboy. Fighting.

Word Court: 2770

Likes, reblogs, comments are appreciated!

Please do not repost, translate or otherwise copy my work elsewhere, without my express permission, thank you! Lunaroserites on tumblr and ao3

Catch up here: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 ❤️

“You think I can just say fuck it and drop out?” The words tumbled out of your mouth quickly as you walked with Nat toward the arena. Practice was in the afternoon today because there was a game tonight. According to Nat our rival team would be here later to do some warm up before the game tonight. 

“Seriously?” She raised a manicured brow at you. 

“Maybe Pietro was right. I should be a drama major,” you whispered, mostly to yourself. You knew you were being over dramatic about the ordeal, but Barnes was an egotistical jerk and he was going to make this project hell. Was that a pessimistic take on it? Maybe. Were you wrong? Probably not. 

You pulled your school hoodie tighter, winter's grasp was holding on tight this year. The wind nipped at your nose and cheeks as you both made your way into the arena. Once inside the main doors heat blasted at you, you rubbed your arms with your hands and looked at Nat who was doing the same. 

“You are dramatic. But it’s gonna be fine,” her confidence almost made you believe her. Originally you were just going to wait and ask him outside the arena, in hopes maybe his cocky, surefire attitude would be on the back burner. But Nat said practice was amping up now as the season drew closer to playoffs and the team would be traveling a lot more. Nat led us to our seats next to the bench, another woman was sitting there already. 

“Peggy!” Nat said cheerfully, as she sat down next to her. 

“Natasha!” she said cheerfully back. “Who’s this?” She smiled at you. You waved and introduced yourself.

“Oh you’re the one doing the art project? Steve mentioned it,” she asked. 

You nodded, “news travels fast?” you laugh a little weirded out how she already knew. 

“Hockey players gossip worse than fishermen wives in the locker room...”

“And out of it,” Nat added with a laugh, Peggy chuckled as well.

 “And Barnes can’t shut up about the fact you drew him,” Peggy said with an eyeroll. Right, you thought. Peggy probably spent a decent time around him, since Steve and him were best friends, from your understanding it was rare to see one without the other. 

“I’m not surprised,” you chuckled, looking down at your sketchpad. The night before you stayed up and watched videos of Barnes’ best plays and a couple of his interviews. There were some very detailed pictures of his face there. You quickly turned to a black page so Nat wouldn’t see it and poke fun. When you found a muse, it was hard for you to focus on anything but it. You could feel the hole you were digging getting bigger and bigger. 

“Fuck,” you glared at Barnes as he slammed into the glass in front of you, startling you. He had his helmet lifted and he was giving you a bright and flirty smile. You raised an eyebrow at him and shook your head, uninterested in his antics. He slipped his helmet down and pushed back, skating backwards, he moved so fluidly, you couldn’t help but pay attention. 

“Oi! Barnes. Pay attention,” someone snapped, you looked towards the voice and stared for a moment. 

“Coach Fury,” Nat said to you, “the only person that can get Barnes to pay attention besides Steve,” she finished. You nodded before looking back at the players. Your eyes were drawn to a smaller player, he wore a 12 on his back, Stark. He had been in one of your business classes you took in your second semester. He was an interesting guy, cocky and arrogant, he also came from money. His father was the owner of Stark Industries. He was speeding up and down the ice with ease. 

“12, he's fast,” you murmured to Nat, who nodded.

“He broke a record last year, his size makes it easier for him to zoom around,” Nat answered as she looked down at my paper, “Barnes really has your eye doesn’t he, this is like the Hela thing all over again,” she chuckled.  

“Yeah,” you blushed deeply and looked back down at your paper. You really wished one of the other teammates caught your attention, if Clint did this would be much simpler. But of of course the school hot shot had to be one to catch your eye.

“Hey,” Nat lifted your chin and made you look at her. “It’s fine, muses come and go. That’s how art is,” she smiled, that was one thing you loved about Nat, she never questioned or made fun of your muses or how ridiculous an idea you had was when it came to your art. She would poke fun, and make silly jokes, but nothing harmful. Just good natured fun. Her support was unwavering and true. 

Nat was a dancer, she was studying dance and dance theory. That’s how you two met, you accidently stumbled into one of the dance studios after hours instead of the art room. She was there practicing, and made small talk with you. You ended up just sitting on the dance room floor and working on your project talking with her as she practiced. 

“You know what’s funny, I didn’t think about dance for this project,” you chuckled after you relaxed a little. Nat’s face broke into a wide smile. 

“It would be the same as Pietro and the track team, but at least we look cute in our dance attire,” she mused lightly. You laughed loudly at her comment. 

“You really hate those track uniforms,” you shook your head as you chuckled some more. Clint zipped passed a moment later and Nat‘s eye followed him like a magnet. “Goodness, you’re so in love, it’s sickening,” you mused, she pushed your shoulder playfully. 

“How long have you two known one another?” Peggy asked. 

“Since first semester,” you answered her with a smile. 

“You guys are such good friends, I would have expected childhood bestfriends,” Peggy said, as she smiled at Steve who skated by. 

“We just clicked,” you shrugged, returning to your sketchpad. 

Practice drew to a close a little while later and you followed behind Nat and Peggy as they made their way back toward the locker room. There were a few girls, including Pepper Potts, Starks on again/off again girlfriend. Every other week Nat would be talking about it. The girl Bucky had on his arm last time was missing from the group of girls waiting for the players to leave the locker room. First out was Clint, and he made a beeline for Nat, instantly pulling her into a hug and pressing his nose into her neck, she squealed a little as his cold nose made contact with her skin.

Peggy excused herself to go wait by the door for Steve who emerged with Barnes a moment later. She whispered something in Steve’s ear and pointed over at you with a smile. Steve nodded and waved with a small smile of his own. Barnes followed his gaze and instantly he perked up when he noticed you. He swaggered toward you, past the gaggle of girls waiting to try and get his attention, you noticed a couple of them glare in your direction. You stood with your arms crossed over your chest, sketch book tucked against your side. You looked up at him as he came up to you making a complete stop a foot in front of you. He really didn’t care about personal space, you took one step back so you didn't have to crane your neck as much to look him in the face.

“And what do I owe the pleasure today Doodle,” you cocked an eyebrow at the nickname, and squinted slightly. The nickname didn’t make you scrunch your nose or want to gag so it wasn’t the worst. You sighed heavily and danced on the balls of your feet for a moment. He just stared, watching you intently, a dumb cocky smirk plastered on his face. 

“Would you let me draw you for my art project?” You asked, you wished the weight bearing down on your shoulders lifted but it didn’t. You dreaded the thought of spending more time with this menace of a man. His lip twitched further upward and showed some of his perfect white teeth. 

“Ah Doodle, I thought you'd never ask,” he ruffled your hair with one of his big hands. You groaned and moved your head from him and tried to fix your hair. 

“Don’t touch me, please,” you said sternly. “I just need permission to draw you and use your likeness.” 

“Ah don’t be like that,” he moved forward and you stepped backwards and to the right, dodging him. He huffed in annoyance and you stared at him with your arms crossed again and slight scowl. “Will you be at the game tonight?” He asked, finally standing upright, his own arms crossed across his broad chest. 

“Seats are sold out besides the reserved seats for team partners,” you stated, “so no not tonight.”  

“There's always a seat reserved for my girl, you can have that one,” he stated matter of factly. 

“I’m not your girl,” you said back firmly. “This whole thing is for my art project,” you moved your hand jestering to both of you, “it ends once my project is done.” 

You couldn’t quite place the look on his face after you said that, but you could pick up the small look of challenge in his eyes. It seemed he was making this game, like he was contemplating how long it would be before you would cave and give him what he wanted. Another notch in his bed post. From what you could tell based on his body language alone he was not used to being rejected. Women usually flaunted over him and fell in his lap, all he had to do was choose who he wanted at that moment. Your determination to not be one of those girls was considered a challenge to him, met head on with stubborn determination to break you down and get what he wanted in the end. That made your stomach twist at the thought, he only wanted to do this to sleep with you, have some fun and then dump you off on Loki’s lap heart broken. 

You shook your head, lost in your own thoughts. Barnes was still looking at you, a contemplative look on his face. He had his chin in his hand as he rubbed it, “this will be fun, see you tonight Doodle.” You glared at him as he walked away, twirling his keys around his finger. 

“Jerk,” you said softly to yourself before you made your way over to Nat and Clint. 

“Well that went better than I expected,” Nat said quietly as the three of you left the rink until you had to be back later. 

A sleek black car was parked at the curb, you waved goodbye to Nat and Clint as you ran over to the car and slid into the passenger seat, you rolled the window down and shouted “goodbye! See you later,” Nat waved and they continued walking. 

“Hey Loki!” You said cheerfully. 

“Hello darling, I take it asking Barnes went well?” He asked as he put the car in drive and pulled out from the curb. 

“It went alright. The cocky bastard,” you clipped your belt in place and turned your head to look at Loki fully. “He’s already flirting with me,” you shook your head in annoyance. 

“At least he has good taste darling,” Loki said sweetly as we sped down the freeway into town to have an early dinner.

“Have fun darling,” Loki shouted out the open window of the car as he dropped you off at the arena. You turned back and gave him an unamused smile and flipped him off. 

“Yeah, fuck you,” you said with a slight laugh and turned away, waving, “love you dork,” you said over your shoulder. Nat was waiting just inside the arena for you and led you to your seats. 

“So one of the perks of dating hockey players? Free seats?” You mused sitting down next to her, the arena was still pretty empty as the game didn’t start for 45 minutes. 

“One of them,” she chuckled. Warm ups started and Clint stopped for a moment in front of us and lifted his helmet.

“Hey girls,” he said with a smile before darting off to warm up. 

“Looks like Barnes just noticed us,” Nat said as he skated over. 

“He had me clocked from the parking lot,” you grumbled. Nat laughed loudly and placed her hand on your shoulder wiping a tear from her eye. 

“You’re not wrong,” she said between giggles. Barnes skated forward and came to stop sending glittering flecks of shaved ice toward the glass. 

“Nat, Doodle, how's my new favourite girl?” He asked with a cocky smile. You rolled your eyes, and placed your cheek on your hand as you looked at him with a deadpan expression, Nat smirked next to you. You watched as Barnes ran his tongue over his teeth, he then winked and skated off to join warm ups. 

“Do the woman he dates actually like that attitude?” You mused absently as you doodled on the open page of your sketchbook. Nat shrugged.

“Honestly, they’re probably more interested in his looks, and don’t care about anything else. That or the potential paycheck he’ll be earning if they can tie him down long enough,” She said softly. Your gut twisted uncomfortably at that, and you grimaced. Sure the guy was an arrogant prick, but he deserved better than that. Nat noticed your facial expression and nodded. “It’s not really fair, there's moments when he’s more than the arrogant show off, he’s pretty sweet. I think he’s just gotten used to hiding it; he doesn't bother being anything else.” 

“Be what they expect of you and no one will question it,” you hummed. You mindless doodles turned into a simple sketch of his face. You admired the sharpness of his jaw, his mouth set in a soft line that was slightly upturned.  

The game started, and you were too focused on watching Barnes skate to really watch the game. Not that you really understood the sport enough to really understand what was happening in front of you. First intermission passed and they were half through the second period when a black punk landed on your sketch pad. It startled you and your head shot up and you meant Barnes eyes. Nat was giggling next to you as you picked the offending puck up and handed it to the kid sitting behind you, who happened to be wearing a Barnes jersey. The kids day was made and Barnes’ narrowed his eyes at you. You smirked back in return and went back to drawing. 

The crowd erupted in loud chants as Barnes scored with less than a second left in the third period, winning the game for your college. You watched as Barnes skated around celebrating his goal only for the captain of the other team to get up in his face. You tensed up as you watched the guy push Barnes shoulders and then grab his protective gear getting in his face. 

So the rest of the team came to investigate and there was an all out brawl on the ice right in front of you. You stood up and looked down. Barnes was on top of the captain, his fist raised and he was breathing heavily. 

“Bucky,” his name left your lips before you could stop it and he had to have heard you because his face tilted in your direction for a fraction of a second and the captain took that as an opportunity to flip Barnes over and bring a hard fist down on the bridge of his nose. You shrieked as blood gushed out of Barnes’ nose. Nat was standing next to you as you both watched in horror. 

You turned your head and saw your college coach hopping the bench and helping refs break it up. Steve hauled the other team's captain off his best friend and shoved him into the arms of other teammates who pulled him further away. Steve helped Barnes up and took his face in his hands, Barnes just gave him a dopey smile. His gaze turned to you for a moment and he smiled a bigger smile.  You looked at him with wide eyes and your mouth agape, horrified. 

The captain of the other team didn’t look like he fared much better. He was bloody and his eye was swelling shut with each passing second. Coach Fury looked pissed, and was stalking over to the other teams coach for a few words, a ref following close behind.

Taglist: @vicmc624, @calwitch, @learisa, @aaqua-tofana

Feel free you send me a message if you have a request or would like more, or would like to be added to the tag list <3

[yourmidnightlover]

his ARMS in this movie… OH MY-

WHAT THE AUDIO SAID

[yourmidnightlover]

i. am. obsessed.

JEALOUSY & FLIRTATION MASTERLIST

18+

Frat!Bucky x F!Reader

There's nothing you want more than Bucky Barnes - but you and his best friend, Juniper, seem to have that in common.

Series Warning: Frat!Bucky x F!Reader, Bucky has a best friend who is obsessed with him, F!OC, some pick me behaviour, fluff, angst, smut.

Part One: Operation Distract Juniper Johnson

Part Two: The Second Encounter

Part Three: The End

Part Four: Mr Bitter

Part Five: Operation Distract Juniper Johnson II

Part Six: Investigation Launched

[yourmidnightlover]

anyone have any bucky blurb requests or anything? i need more material so i can reasonably continue avoiding my WIPs

[yourmidnightlover]

just thinking about bucky and you leaving a mission together on one of the jets.

it was a grueling mission, nearly losing a dozen civilians and even bucky himself because you simply weren't fast enough.

so, you needed to feel closer to him. you needed to feel him... all over.

"jamie?" you whispered softly as he steered the jet home.

"yes, doll?" he tilted his head back a little, signaling for you to come closer to him.

you didn't reply, you merely stepped closer before throwing one leg over his lap and sitting in it, straddling his meaty thighs. meeting no resistance, you threw your arms around his neck, burrowing your nose in the crevice between his jaw.

"i'm here," he sighed, his flesh hand beginning to rub along your back. "we're okay."

"need you," you ground down against his pelvis, feeling his dick twitch in his pants, growing harder by the second. "please? wanna be close."

"fuck, baby," his hips thrust up to meet your eagerness. "wanna be closer than this?" you nodded eagerly. "you're gonna have to be a big girl... do it yourself until i can set autopilot."

you whined in his ear, gently biting his earlobe, "but i-"

"no 'but's," he sharply interrupted. "there's too much chatter and traffic up here right now. if you can do it yourself right now, i'll make it up to you once it's clear. that's a promise."

it was your turn to sigh before you began to grind against him even harder, seemingly having made up your mind.

your breathing grew heavier in his ear once he was fully hard, providing much better stimulation for your throbbing clit. you reached between your two heaving bodies, unbuckling and unzipping his pants before simply grinding against his hard cock with no barriers between you.

you were so wet, he nearly slipped inside accidentally. his head would catch perfectly on your clit, eliciting the prettiest squeals from your mouth.

"that's it, my pretty girl," his hand that was once rubbing your back went between you to rub your clit. "let me hear how good you feel. i can already hear how wet you are. do you like getting off on my dick like this? rubbing against me like a pretty little slut? my pretty little slut, huh?"

"your pretty little slut, yes," you nodded against his chest before you rose to your knees, this time lining his cock against your entrance before slowly lowering yourself on him. "yours, all yours."

"atta girl," he chuckled with a growl, his dick twitching inside you once you were lowered all the way. "so wet for me, my perfect girl."

you began to ride him leisurely, enjoying how close you felt to him. you were able to feel his pulse in his cock, radiating from your core to your heart. part of you swears your heart was matching his quick pace.

"just like that," he threw his head back momentarily before quickly remembering why he wasn't properly fucking your brains out and went back to focusing on the task in front of him. "such a good slut for me," he felt you clenching around him before your rhythm faltered. "are you close? i want you to cum when i tell you to," he felt you nodding against his shoulder as his pace barely sped up on your clit. "love feelin' you squeeze me like this baby. love when you listen to me so well. such a good girl for me," you were getting closer.

"please? so close," your breath hitching wasn't the only sign you had, your pussy was gripping him like a vice.

"i know, baby," he chuckled. "i feel it. wanna cum with you. just a little longer," he began thrusting up to meet your hips. a few more perfectly timed bounces and he was ordering you, "cum for me. i want you to cum all over my fucking cock."

with a scream, your entire body was slumped against his, going slack from how powerful your orgasm was.

"oh my-fuck! keep going! keep going!" you begged him as he continued to fuck up into you as he came, his cum painting your walls.

"so fucking good, 's so fucking good," bucky kept muttering, talking you through your high.

he stayed inside of you as the two of you caught your breath. after 10 minutes, the traffic must've cooled down because he kept your legs wrapped around him as he stood, walking you over to one of the cots they had set up in the jet.

you were so exhausted, all you remember is him cleaning up the mess between your thighs, him whispering how strong and wonderful you are. him whispering how much he loved you, and that was all you needed to fall into a peaceful rest.

[yourmidnightlover]

timeless - ch. 4

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

series summary: you, bucky and steve were the best of friends growing up. what happens when you're assigned to be a war nurse for the 107th? what happens when bucky finds himself 70 years later with scattered memories of the girl who brought him so much comfort? will your love for each other remain after all of the pain you've been put through? will your love for each other remain timeless?

chapter summary: in a flashback chapter, we see how you and bucky are captured by the other side...

warnings: restraints used against bucky and reader, implied/threatened sexual assault, canon typical violence, talk of war, wounds/stitches/gunshot wounds/blood/etc, please let me know if i've missed anything

w/c: 2.5k+

a/n: AHHHHHH! i'm sorry it's taken me so long to put out this new chapter! a lot's been going on in my personal life lately but i've finally managed to push out the next chapter! it's gonna get very real in the next chapter... so be prepared.

<- chapter 3 ~ chapter 5 ->

“they’ve pushed past the lines of defense at our home base,” a corporal had alerted bucky as he was cleaning his rifle at their shooting sight. “that’s why there’s practically nobody here, sir.”

“what do you mean pushed past our lines of defense…” he was worried about the next words that would come out of his mouth. “are-is everyone okay? are they in danger?” 

“sir… i’ve gotten a report that says there have already been casualties,” bucky’s face grew dark as the reality of the threat became much more real. 

“we’re going back,” bucky began packing his supplies in his pack, not caring at all about organization before running towards the home base. 

the sounds of shots and the smell of gunpowder became much more prominent with each mile he ran. how could he have missed that? missed hundreds of men going past their base… they must’ve found another way around them. it certainly wasn't an aircraft, so they had to have gone underground. 

and now you were in danger. you could already be-

no. no, he couldn’t think about that right now. he couldn’t think about losing you when he hadn’t even had you, yet. you were supposed to marry him. 

well, maybe first go on a date with him… even his ma new he was head over heels for you. steve knew it, somehow you were the only one who didn’t know how hard he’d fallen for you. 

he couldn’t lose you without at least telling you that. 

there weren’t anymore gunshots ringing through the air, although the smell of gunpowder was still lingering. 

“y/n!” he had finally reached the home base, amidst all of the action. “doll?” it was barren where he was slowly walking, his gun raised and ready to shoot. 

he went tent to tent, searching for you and any other signs of life. beneath his feet was the crunching of fallen leaves, crumbling beneath his weight with each step. bucky had never felt any sort of relation to a damn leaf until now. 

eventually, he came upon a dark cabin, a few miles from their original home base. he picked the lock with the skills he had learned growing up in brooklyn all these years before slowly opening the door, his heart pounding with what he saw inside. 

bodies littered the floor, their chests still rising at least. they had puncture wounds and gunshots ranging from their abdomens to their legs. groans of agony rang out quietly as he made his way around the room. he could practically smell the metallic and coppery scent that only accompanied the presence of an abundance of blood.

a breath of relief passed through him when he saw your ragged nurse uniform in the back corner of the large cabin, tending to one of someone’s many wounds the best you could. they had a washcloth in their mouth as you dabbed their wounds with what he assumed to be disinfectant. the man grimaced, biting down harder on the washcloth as you shushed him with quiet apologies, telling the man he was so brave and strong, promising the pain would be over soon.

he jogged over to you, wrapping his arms around your middle, shocked when he felt your elbow logged into his gut. 

“woah,” he groaned as he doubled over in pain, falling to his knees  not prepared for you to take a shot at him. “fair enough,” he rang out through clenched teeth. 

“ja-jamie?” your voice wavered as you got on your knees to wrap your arms around him. “i thought you died,” you sobbed into his shoulder, clearly having already been crying this whole time while trying to comfort the many soldiers. “i was so worried-i didn’t-nobody told me if you were still out there,” you continued to cry as his hand went to cradle your head, his other arm wrapping around your waist. 

“i thought you might’ve…” he sighed, finding comfort in your breath on his neck. “nevermind that, you’re here. you’re safe. and i’m never letting you out of my sight again.”

“there’s-they’re all injured here,” you shook your head as you pulled back to search his eyes. “can you-are you hurt, too?”

“no-no, i’m alright, doll.” both his hands cradled your face. 

“do you remember the procedures to do when tending to these guys?” your eyes were wide. “i need some help, i haven’t seen any of my girls since they invaded… if you can tend to the smaller wounds, wrap them up, i can focus on the gunshot wounds, so i can get the bullets and stitch?”

“anything,” he nodded as you handed him a pack full of disinfectant, antibacterial, gauze, and wrap. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to manage things for now.

the two of you worked for around two hours before nightfall came. most of the severe cases had already been tended to, everyone still alive thanks to you. you told him how they had invaded, coming from the ground up. 

you had tried to drag as many people as you could with you as you ran, others told him that you even went back to help out more. he had never been more proud of his girl. a part of him, one that he couldn’t help but agree with, argued that you should have never been subject to that kind of task. he should have been here to protect you. he should have been the one to guard you, to make sure you never had to go through the stress of saving someone else from gunshots ringing through the air.

“i killed someone, jamie.” he looked up from his patient to see you, tears streaming down your face. “i-i had to, he was coming at me and one of the guys, but i-i killed him.”

the soldier he was tending to put a hand on bucky’s shoulder, clearly understanding how much he wanted to wrap you in his arms. the soldier nodded, seemingly giving his permission for bucky to leave him and his superficial wounds to make sure his girl was alright. bucky nodded back at the soldier before marching towards you, gently grabbing your arm this time, and letting you wrap yourself around him. his hand traced your back mindlessly as your sobs slowed. 

“it’s hard,” he nodded, still keeping you close to him. “i wish i could say it gets easier, but i don’t think that’s such a good thing. i think the fact that you feel that pain, the grief and sorrow, it means you’re more human than the rest of us. being desensitised to killing isn’t something to be proud of, but feeling that pain?” he pulled back to look at you. “i’m so glad you can still feel. i hate seeing you in pain, or sad, or frustrated, but if it means that you’re still a bit more human than the rest of us then i think it’s a battle you’ve won.”

you took a second to look into his enrapturing eyes before replying, “how is it you always know what to say?” 

“y/n,” he took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to articulate what he wanted-needed to tell you before you heard the crunching of leaves from outside. 

it was like a wave of cold washed over everyone inside the cabin’s room. bucky walked quickly to grab his rifle before gazing outside a crack in one of the boarded up windows. you stood right behind him, a hand on his shoulder and your breath grazing his neck. 

-

it happened so fast. 

most of the guys had only needed a little patching up, so they were able to put up at least a bit of a fight. one of the biggest surprises, though, was that this time, they weren’t shooting bullets. 

they were shooting tranquilizers.

bucky had manuevered you behind him to shield you from the men as he began shooting at the germans. 

eventually, he ran out of ammunition. quicker than either of you had expected, in fact. after that, it all came crashing down around you. bucky turned towards you, wrapping his arms around your torso as the two of you got down to the ground. he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“i’ve got you.” another kiss landed on the crown of your head as piping hot tears streamed down your face. “i’m so sorry, y/n. i’m so sorry,” he pressed his forehead against your own as you awaited the cold release of death.

although, it never came. 

what did come, however, was the sting in your right shoulder. you pulled back to briefly look at bucky, squeezing his arms with an attempted smile before succumbing to your body’s exhaustion, slumping against his chest for just a brief moment of calm. then, the darkness took over. 

when you woke, a bright light was piercing your eyes. your head was throbbing, and upon trying to lift your arms to rub your temples, you realized you couldn’t. your arms were bound to wherever you were laying. turning your head, you realized you were in a dingy looking room. there was another bed beside yours, though. 

“y/n?” bucky’s voice rang out. “doll, are you awake now? please, god, tell me you’re awake.” you could hear the desperation in his voice. 

“mhmm,” you couldn’t even nod your head. “m’head hurts, jamie. i don’t-where are we?” your voice cracked as you finished the sentence, you almost wanted to curse yoursel for letting vulnerability show. almost. the citation was dire as it was, a little fear was especially normal. 

“i-they…” he took a deep breath. you wanted nothing more than to hold him in this time right now. maybe you’d rather him hold you, because, dammit, you were terrified. but the guilt that was buried underneath his tone was so noticeable you couldn’t help wanting to comfort him. “they’ve got us, doll,” his humorless chuckle did little to hide his fear or disappointment. “i’ll-i’ll figure this out, though. i’ll get us out of here. i’ll get you out of here. it’ll be okay. you’ll be okay.” it seemed as though he was trying to convince himself rather than you. 

“it’ll be okay,” you assured him. “we have to be strong, buck. we’ll get through this.”

there was thumping and rustling at, what you assumed was, the entrance. 

“good to see you two awake,” a thick accent, russian, solidified your greatest fears. you were captured by the other side. “we have a lot planned for you two… the tests we’ve performed seemed to be very assuring.” the male voice got closer to you, between you and bucky. “aren’t you a pretty little thing, american.” his hand grabbed your chin harshly, you squealed from the shock. 

“don’t fucking touch her!” you heard bucky fighting against the restraints, the strong metal rendering his muscles no match. “don’t hurt her!”

“oh… are you her lover?” he chuckled as he released your chin. “we have a little bet going on, the way you tried to protect her was very new to what we’ve seen. some think lovers… i’ve got a lot in the pot.”

“it’s none of your fucking business,” you finally spoke to the man. “what the hell are you doing to us? what do you want?” there was more venom in your voice than you ever thought possible.

the back of his hand trailed down your cheek before he cleared his throat. “we’re trying out some new… vaccinations on you. no need to fret, pretty one. you’ll find out what and why soon enough.”

vaccinations… what the hell? you had thought animal testing was still all the rage for testing products, especially overseas. you haven’t heard of human testing in ages. maybe that’s for a reason. obviously a government would want to keep that a secret. 

perhaps america was doing the same thing themselves, experimenting on soldiers and hostages they would otherwise kill. 

god, this was probably gonna hurt like hell. 

“ladies first?” the man offered, as if he were being a kind gentleman. 

“no!” bucky fought once more. “me! test me first! i’ll comply… i won’t fight, just don’t hurt her.” there was so much desperation in his voice as he pleaded for your life. 

“you understand the… vaccinations may react different on both men and women? there’s a reason we kept your girlfriend for further testing as well. either way, what’s done to you will be done to her. although, i can’t say we won’t do a bit more to that pretty face of hers.”

“fuck you,” you spat out with a rasp. 

“that could be arranged, pretty one,” he laughed before he began to stalk towards bucky. “i will listen to you this time. don’t say i never did anything for you.”

“no!” it was your turn to strain against the metal pieces keeping your body down to the table. “don’t hurt him, please!” you felt tears welling in your eyes before bucky’s voice became calm.

“it’s okay, doll,” you could hear his voice shake. “i’ll be okay. just stay strong for me, please.”

“jamie…” your voice cracked, even though you would’ve liked to play the role of a touch prisoner that couldn’t be broken. 

you couldn’t help but feel hopeless as he escorted bucky out. your sobs began to echo throughout the room. 

you were in a russian base, being experimented on with the man who doesn’t even know how much you love him. 

you prayed to a God you didn’t know if you believed in for the first time in a long time. you prayed that he would make it out alive, that he wouldn’t be harmed. that you could see daylight again with him. that one day you’d be able to tell him how much you truly loved him.

prayed that it wasn’t too late to tell him everything…

TAGS: 

@cjand10

@coldheartedmar

@ordelixx

@whiskytoast

@cookingdancingchick

[yourmidnightlover]

this deserves SOOOOO much more attention

I just saw a skating show and one of the guys looked like bucky and now I NEED a yn × figure skating partner bucky one shot. With them working on a throw and he's all mad she can't land it then gets hurt and all the angst and comforting. Omg please I'll cry I love you! ❤️

Ok, I have to admit this was my first ask and I got so excited that this got a little away from me. I'd like to say I'm sorry for not putting much technical stuff about figure skating in it but I know really nothing, I did my best researching stuff but it's still not much. I hope you're happy how it turned out, if not let me know! I really just took it and ran with it, I really hope you like it. 🥹❤️

also, sorry it took me a little but my keyboard broke and I had to wait for the new one because writing on the phone I would've made too many mistakes.

On Thin Ice - Bucky Barnes x y/n Stark

Summary: you're paired with Bucky Barnes for an important competition but your negative feelings towards each other make everything much more difficult. Figure Skating AU.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!Stark reader

Warnings: Bucky being an ass. Reader gets hurt. Angst. Language cause why not. Minimal use of Y/N.

Word Count: 6.6K

A/N: I didn't proof read it honestly, I was just excited to publish it. I'm going to double check it sometime tomorrow and edit it later! ❤️

Masterlist

Being a Stark wasn’t always easy. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not like you’re superheroes or anything, but being the daughter of Tony Stark meant that you always had to be not only on your best behavior but you had to be the best in general, no matter what you were doing. It’s always been a lot of pressure growing up, but it was something you were used to at this point, all your life there just wasn’t room for failure. When you were little you hated it, sometimes even hated your dad for it, but you had to give it to him that it made you detail oriented and more driven and focused than most, so with time you came to be grateful for it. His continuous badgering you into taking various lessons as a kid is also what led you to discover your passion: figure skating.

Skating was something that just somehow came naturally to you, and the more time you spent at the ice rink the more you fell in love with it. You loved just spending hours going and going, to the point where the world blurred around you and you almost felt like you were flying. After seeing how happy it made you, your father eased up a bit on you, but he still expected perfection from you, which you always worked hard to provide. All you’ve always wanted was to make him proud of you, which he was and never failed to mention, but you were still terrified of disappointing him. All the pressure your last name came with was nothing compared to the pressure you put on yourself, you were always your hardest critic.

That is, at least, until you met Bucky Barnes.

You didn’t know why, maybe he just hated you and liked to humiliate you, but it seemed like he always had something to say about your performances.

It all started the very first day you met, you were 18 at the ice rink your father decided to buy for you on your birthday the week before. You were shocked to say the least when he told you, but he had always been better at showing his love rather than saying it, and don’t ever let it be said that Tony Stark didn’t love his daughter to death. It was the same place where you skated for the first time when you were merely 5 years old, which was then changed for one closer to your home, but this one held so much more sentiment for you that the extra travel time was worth it, and it was also much bigger, the place where a lot of the important competitions happened. 

The Saturday after your birthday you finally had some free time having just finished exams week and finally being done with high school once and for all, so you planned to meet up with Natasha at the newly named ‘Stark’s snowland’. Natasha was also a figure skater and you two have known each other since you were 8 years old, participating in almost a lot your competitions together, which usually ended with the two of you in first and second place, then Natasha started doing more and more couples competitions with various partners, but you were still always there to cheer for each other.

When she texted she was running late, you decided to just wait for her on the ice so you went inside, put on your skates and just got lost in your head, glad that the early hour meant nobody was around yet. Then, after having done a few easy moves and having just finished an Axel, you heard some clapping coming from the entrance of the rink. You stopped abruptly and looked for the source of the noise when you spotted a brunette cheering on you like he was at the Olympics standing beside a blonde that looked kind of embarrassed by his friends' antics.

-didn’t realize I had an audience- you said, while moving towards them.

-well you should with the way you move out there- the brunette said, shamelessly checking you out, shortly before receiving a smack behind his head, courtesy of blondie.

-sorry about him. My name’s Steve- he said while you tried hard not to laugh at the look his friend was giving him -and this jerk here is Bucky- he pointed at his friend, who seemed to remember you were there because he turned to you with a charming smile while you introduced yourself.

-is this your first time skating here?- Bucky asked -I’m sure I would remember a pretty face like yours- he then added, making you blush.

-I usually only come here for competitions, but- before you could finish talking you heard the door behind them open and Natasha screaming -Stark!- making the boys turn around to look at her.

-Romanoff- you greeted her, laughing. Bucky turned back to you, face suddenly all serious, which confused you a lot since he was all flirty smiles until two seconds before, mumbled something about having to go and almost ran away as fast as he could.

You looked at Steve who seemed as confused as you felt, gave you an apologetic smile and went after his friend.  You didn’t have much more time to ponder on the sudden turn of events because Natasha was in her skates on record time and raring to go. All you know is, for the rest of the day you felt Bucky’s eyes on you but every time you turned to him he had a stoic look on his face, and every word out of his mouth towards you was criticism on whatever you were doing. And here we are now, 6 years later and nothing has changed.

Now 24 and having graduated college, you can be found at Stark’s almost everyday while you figure out the next phase of your life. It’s honestly not bad, your dad wanted you to intern for him at Stark’s Industries during college so, after you graduated, you could start working for him full time, but that’s not what you wanted. If you’re honest with yourself you do want to take over your father’s empire one day, just not yet. You wanted to keep doing skating competitions so all the free time that you had during college was spent skating, so, as a compromise, your dad had you teach a few kid classes during the week when one of the teachers unexpectedly quit one day, and you happily agreed. You did this for all the duration of college, after graduating you kept doing it and, to your father’s delight, took on even more classes to keep you a bit more occupied.

It was at the end of one of these classes that you were suddenly approached by Barnes today, which was very rare. Usually both of you did your best to avoid each other, even when you started being there everyday, you wouldn’t give each other even a second glance. You’ve liked him when you first met him, but after months of him being nothing but an ass to you, you decided to stop trying and largely ignore him unless you were in a larger group that consisted of you, him, Steve, Natasha, Sam (another friend of theirs, that you quickly became friends with) and Scott, a friend you made your first week of college.

Needless to say, you were baffled to see Bucky walk up to you and not immediately insult your behavior during the lesson that just ended, like he usually does when he gifts you with his presence, but instead he said -Hey Stark, can we talk?-

-Uhm… sure. What’s up, Barnes?- you said while starting to put down the cones you would need for your next class.

-you know the couples competition that we’re having here in a few months?- he asked, following behind you. You thought he looked nervous, which you found weird as Bucky Barnes is as confident as they come.

-yeah, what about it?- you stop what you’re doing, too curious to not give him all your attention.

-well, I wanted to sign up, but it seems like I’m missing a partner- he says while rubbing his neck, almost embarrassed by what he’s asking.

-don’t you usually team up with Nat?- you ask him.

-I do, but she’s gonna be out of town that day, and all the other girls are either paired up or not interested…- he explains, still not going to the point.

-where are you going with this, Barnes?- you asked, crossing your arms in irritation at the time he was wasting while you still had things to do before your class.

-are you really going to make me ask?- he almost whined and, when you merely arched your eyebrow, a clearly amused face at his almost desperation, he finally got the point of his interruption. -fine. Will you be my partner?-

Although you suspected where he was going, it was still a little shocking to hear him ask. Before you answered him though, you felt the need to tell him -you know I’ve never done pairs before, right? Not even outside of competitions.-

-I know, but I also know you’re a fast learner.- at your confused look, he elaborates -You’ve been training here for what, six years now? I’ve seen you learn pretty advanced moves in a crazy short amount of time for last minute competitions or even just for fun. And, whether I like it or not, you’re one of the best figure skaters I’ve ever met.- he finishes.

That last sentence has you scoffing at him and starting to get annoyed at him -you don’t need to lie to me just to get me to agree just because you’re desperate for a partner.-

-why would you think I’m lying?- he says while having the audacity to look confused at my anger.

-you do nothing but criticize me all the time! The real question is, why would I ever think otherwise?-

-Just because I criticize you, doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re good!- he said it like was the most obvious thing in the world. -please Y/N, I really need a partner, and, right now, you’re my only choice. Please.- he added at the end, just for good measure.

To be fair, Bucky had never been this polite or patient with you, and has never even called you by your first name, so it was clear that this was important to him, which is probably what led you to say yes. He seemed happy for all of two seconds before going back to being the usual jerk, which made you instantly start to regret your decision, but you figured old habits die hard, you just had to be a little patient and he would get easier to work with the more he got used to this. 

Boy, were you wrong. 

For the next three months you met with Bucky three times a week, working out your routine and training sometimes even for hours. It wasn’t anything you hadn’t done before, but what really annoyed you to no end was finding out that Bucky’s favorite brand of training seemed to be complaining. All he did was criticize every move you made, right or wrong, even the couples ones you were still learning. You also found out the fact that being so close to him for such long periods of time made you clumsier than ever, which did not at all help the situation. All it took was for you to be near him enough to be surrounded by his cologne and suddenly you were falling more than usual, missing your cues and straight up forgetting the next steps of the routine, which only gave Bucky more fuel to add to the fire. It also didn’t help that whenever Bucky asked you why you were so distracted you lost all your Stark brand of sarcasm and could barely get out a sound, not knowing how to tell him even if you wanted to, which you definitely didn’t, that he was the problem.

You somehow made it through it and, with a week to go before the competition, you had it down to a T. Or almost.

-damn it- you say, frustrated with yourself, after you almost fall again on the landing of the throw jump. The problem with throw jumps is that Bucky has to pick you up and quite literally throw you in the air and, while he does that quite easily, being so close to him right before he throws you disorients you just enough to miss twists and fumble the landing. A thing that you’d never tell Bucky, which at the moment is giving the most annoyed look you’ve ever seen on his stupidly pretty face.

-seriously, Stark?!- hey almost yells while skating closer to you -why the hell is this taking you so long to get right? You’ve done harder things than this both by yourself and with me, so what the hell is wrong with you?- like always, you don’t quite know how to respond to him, not even wanting to acknowledge the cause of your concentration problem.

-let’s just try again- you say, quieter than you normally would, and get in position. Your back is turned to him but you can hear him sigh before you feel him move and position himself next to you. You nod to Scott who’s controlling the music, and he starts again. Everything is going great, until, again you fumble the landing, but this time you fall on your knees. You can hear Scott shouting your name, so you hold a thumbs up to let him know you’re okay. You can see Bucky getting closer to you with your peripheral vision, but don’t look up or even try to make a move to get up.

You can feel the tears starting to form in your eyes, not because it hurts, but because you’re so frustrated with yourself for not being able to do this. You’re trying your hardest not to cry out of anger when you see Bucky’s hand in front of your face, a silent offer of help. The last thing you want to do right now is look at his stupid face, so you slap his hand away and get up on your own, ignoring Bucky almost altogether and putting yourself in position to start again from the top. Bucky comes behind you, but this time you can feel him looking at you while he says. -we don’t have to go again, we can stop here for today.- much quieter than he’s ever been, which only fuels your anger more.

-the competition’s next week Barnes, unless you want us to make fools of ourselves, we need to do this until I get it right.- you snapped, letting him see your anger for the first time since you started training.

He was a little shocked but didn’t say anything else while he got in position, signaling to Scott to start the music. All you can think about at this point is the disappointment on your dad’s face if you don’t win the competition, or worse fall like you just did. You’re not even focused on Bucky anymore, in fact you’re so distracted that you don’t even make it to the throw jump before you fall, except this time you can feel that something’s wrong as soon as you hit the ice. You can feel pain shoot from your ankle through your whole body and get immediately dizzy, you could barely make out the lights on the ceiling, your eyes going in and out of focus. You could hear yelling and, once you concentrated, you could make out some of Bucky saying words like ‘stupid’ and ‘incompetent’, which made you wish you had just passed out so you wouldn’t have to hear him insult you.

Your mind seemed to clear a little and you realized your tears finally started falling at some point, but you didn’t have much time to ponder on that before you were being helped to your feet, Scott telling you he was taking you to the hospital and everything was going to be okay. You realized Bucky was no longer next to you before you even realized you didn’t have skates on anymore and were barefoot, but you just assumed he was too mad at you to care about your ankle.

You’re in a hospital bed with a stomp on your left foot when your dad walks in, worry all over his face.

-hey junior, are you okay?- you roll your eyes at his nickname, surely you don’t expect Tony Stark to be any less sarcastic seeing you well enough, but you’ve begged him to drop the stupid nickname which he refuses to because ‘but you’re just like me, that’s a compliment!’ -I’m okay dad, just have to wear this for a few days.- you say, pointing to your foot on a pillow.

-good. Wanna tell me what happened?- he asked, taking a seat beside your bed.

-Just landed wrong while practicing the routine with Barnes. Too distracted, kept fucking up landings.- you told him, not daring to look in his eyes.

-pushing yourself too hard?- he surprised you with this question, but you promptly answered -if I was, I would’ve been able to land all my moves correctly. If anything I’m not pushing myself hard enough.- You couldn’t look at his face just to see the disappointment at your failure, but when you felt his hand on yours you forced yourself to look into his eyes, and, to your surprise, there was no hint of disappointment.

-you know, sweetheart, I do mean it when I say you’re just like me. And there is nothing more heartbreaking to me than looking at you and seeing the same self-destructive tendencies I have reflected on you.- he wiped a tear you hadn’t realized was falling from your cheek and kept going. -I hate that I passed that on to you. I should’ve been more careful with you. I thought that letting you know I was proud was enough, unlike my dad, but maybe I should’ve been more specific.-

-what do you mean?- you asked, sniffling a bit.

-I’m not proud of you because you always come first in competitions, or because you get the highest grades. I’m proud of you because I know you always try your best and put all of yourself into everything you do. That’s what being a Stark is all about. Plus you’re my daughter so let’s be honest, I’d love you to death even if you were a high school dropout who deals fake drugs to college kids.-

You laughed while drying your tears, grateful for your father’s inability to stay serious for too long. You hugged him and said -thanks dad. I needed that more than I thought- you let go of him and told him about the real reason you couldn’t concentrate: the long-haired asshole with eyes so blue you felt like you were flying in the sky while looking at them, and like you were drowning the second he opened his mouth to say shit about you. Of course you didn’t put it on those exact terms, but your dad was pretty great at reading between the lines. By the end he had a smirk that made you want to legally change your name and run away because you just know he’s never going to let you live this down.

-well sounds like he’s really something- that’s all he says, weirdly. You eye him suspiciously but he doesn’t add to his sentence.

In fact, he doesn’t say anything more about it until he’s helped you get comfortable on your bed back home. -you know…- he starts -little boys pull little girls’ pigtails on the playground to get their attention, because they don’t know what else to do.- he says.

-yeah, boys are stupid, so what?- he laughs and surprisingly says -exactly. Maybe you’re not the only one that feels something here. Maybe there’s a stupid boy that can’t take his eyes off of you, but doesn’t know how to get your attention other than criticize you.- he says, clearly happy with where we ended.

-Is this your long way of saying that you think Bucky likes me the same way I like him?- you raise your eyebrow at him.

-This is my long way of saying don’t be a stubborn Stark and try actually talking to him about this. You’d be surprised how fast stupid boys grow up just to keep the girl they want. Just ask your mother.- and with that he left, leaving you wondering how much more immature Tony Stark could’ve been to have to grow up just to sweep Pepper Potts off her feet.

You spend the next few days as a little ball of anxiety on your bed, not being able to do much but overthink about Bucky, only getting a break when Scott came to keep you company. The day before the competition you had enough and convinced Scott to drive you to the ice rink, knowing Bucky was probably there. When you got there you could hear music but you didn’t think much of it until you got to right in front of the door and realized it was the song you and Bucky chose. Frowning, you opened the door and what you saw made your jaw drop.

There they were, Bucky and Natasha, doing your routine. You don’t know when you got closer to the rink, but you could not take your eyes off of them, or that is until you heard someone beside you say -they’re good, aren’t they?- you turned your head to see Sam and Steve, the latter looking at you in a knowing way that almost seemed apologetic of Sam’s words, the effect of which Sam didn’t seem to notice. You always felt like Steve could see right through you when it came to Bucky, always looking at you like he knew exactly how you felt and how much his words hurt you.

Seemingly reading all the questions swimming in your mind right now, Steve offers you some answers. -Natasha came back early from her vacation. He brought her up to speed and she agreed to help him out. They’ve been practicing non-stop everyday since the day after you got hurt- feeling like you had enough information, you turned back to the ice. 

Watching them work in sync, almost like they were connected by wires and one couldn’t move without taking the other with them. You watched as Bucky picked up Nat effortlessly and threw her like she was made of air. You watched as she moved so gracefully that it was almost surreal. You saw her land every jump perfectly. Again. And again. And again. Every jump, every twist, every second you watched them something inside you broke. You don’t know why, Natasha has been Bucky’s partner countless times before and it never mattered to you, and you’ve only skated with him for less than four months. Maybe it was the fact that they were using the routing you and Bucky had come up with together, maybe you felt replaced. Maybe it was the fact that you were coming here to talk to Bucky about your feelings and now you were seeing him flying around the ice rink as close with another girl as he was with you, maybe even more.

They finish the routine and you can hear Bucky’s laughter, you can see his smile as he tells Natasha how perfect she was, how impressed he was at how fast she picked everything up, how glad he was that she showed up when she did. Then it hits you. Of course he’s glad she showed up. He never wanted to do this with you, you weren’t even a second choice, it took literally every other girl he knows to be unavailable for him to even think to ask you. Why wouldn’t he be happy to have her back? He certainly never acted like this with you. He never laughed, barely even smiled. He didn’t choose you, he got stuck with you.

Suddenly it’s like everything he’s ever done, everything he’s ever said to you comes crashing down on you all at once. It’s like you can actually hear your heart breaking and there’s only one thought on your mind: He likes Natasha. It makes sense, the first day you met he seemed into you, right up until he saw her and the second he turned around he was done with you. Maybe he started to be an ass just to make that clear, not wanting to actually say anything. After all, he always was very nice to Nat, to everyone but you really. And it’s not like you could blame him, Natasha’s always been better than you. Growing up she was always your only competition, it’s a fortune you ended up friends really, considering how easy it could’ve been for you to hate each other. She’s the reason you spent so much time trying to be better, and you’d like to say it was the same for her, but you doubt it very much. She’s always been prettier, thinner, stronger, smarter, better with boys and at making friends. She was the obvious choice. Of course she was Bucky’s choice.

You didn’t realize you were so deep in your thoughts, or that you were still staring at them, until you felt a hand on your shoulder and heard Sam’s worried voice asking if you were okay. You looked at Steve and Sam and all you wanted to do was get out of there, it was already a miracle you weren’t crying. Without saying a word you turned around and walked away as fast as you could with the damn stump on your foot. You weren’t fast enough, because halfway to the door you heard Bucky’s voice, much too close to you to your liking, calling your name.

For a second you thought you heard something seeming happiness in his voice, but quickly dismissed the idea and tried to keep going, but then you felt his hand on your wrist turning you around to face him. His face seems to instantly fall as he looks at you and all you can think about is how sick you are of being the only one that takes his smile away. -what’s wrong?- he asks in a weirdly soft tone, but you can’t find the voice to answer him. You two just stare at each other until you hear someone clear their throat behind Bucky, and you look over his shoulder just as Natasha starts talking.

-Hi, Stark. Heard what happened to you.- she nodded towards your foot -sorry I haven’t been to visit you, we’ve been pretty busy-

You don’t look at her while you answer, turning your eyes back to Bucky, who’s still holding your wrist, while you say -I can see that. Don’t worry, Romanoff, I’m just glad Barnes finally has a partner that’s not incompetent- all he does is stare confusedly at you, which makes you angry enough to yank your hand away from him, turn around and walk away, ignoring the calls of your name behind you.

You miss the sadness on Bucky’s face, or the way he questions Sam and Steve about everything you said and did since the second you entered. Bucky, on the other hand, did not miss the tears starting to fall from your eyes as you turned away.

You decided not to go to the competition the following day. It would be the first time you voluntarily miss one of Nat’s competitions, but you don’t feel like having a replay of yesterday’s show when it’s already been on replay in your mind all night. Your absence doesn’t go unnoticed by your friends. Nat and Steve being the only ones that understand, even though they’re not very happy about it. Another thing that doesn’t go unnoticed by the group is how much more agitated than normal Bucky seems to be. Even during competitions, he’s usually very calm, but today the only thing that makes him stop pacing around the room is Natasha’s sharp ‘would you sit down’ that makes him sigh and sit next to her on the bleachers where they’re waiting for their turn.

He can’t seem to keep his body still as he starts to bounce his leg up and down out of nerves, and can’t seem to stop even when the redhead gets up abruptly with an exasperated ‘for the love of god’ and goes to sit further from him and near Sam, exchanging seats with Steve that puts a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, effectively bringing out of his head and making his body still with another sigh.

-you know, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to- Steve tells his anxious friend.

-you know I have to Steve, otherwise Fury wont let me do other couples competitions.-

-I know, but the whole reason you started doing them was for the chance to pair up with Y/N, which never even happened until now- Steve said, frowning.

-I’m not the one that assigns the pairs, Rogers, it’s always Fury. He’s the whole reason Romanoff and I worked so hard this week just so she could do this. Plus Y/N’s never been interested in these competitions so this whole idea was just stupid to begin with. Now after I finally convince her, she gets hurt and thinks I think she’s incompetent, for some reason.- Bucky hasn't been able to stop thinking about what you said yesterday. Why would you ever think he thinks you're incompetent? He knows he's been a dick to you for years, but never has he ever said you were incompetent. It's really just constructive criticism given in a poor way. A very poor way. Yeah, he really just has himself to blame for the way you feel about him now, he knows it. He doesn't even really have a justification for it, either. If he's being honest with himself, he's intimidated by you. The first time he saw you he thought you were the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, you were so graceful on skates and looked like you were exactly where you belong, lost in your own little world. Then when Natasha said your name, he realized who he was talking to: the daughter of one of the richest families in town. He'd heard a lot about you and your family, your impressive achievements on and off the ice. He's ashamed to say he felt small all of a sudden, knowing just from hearing about you that he'd never be good enough for you. Still, he couldn't help but be drawn to you, couldn't help but watch you as much as he could get away with, but the only way he could justify that without being seen as a creep was to criticize what you did. It made sense, right? Bucky was pulled from his thoughts, again, by Steve’s voice.

-well, you were basically yelling that at her when she got hurt last week- at his words Bucky was as confused as he was yesterday when you stormed out.

-I didn’t…- then it hit him. -I wasn’t talking about her! I was talking about Scott because he wouldn’t hurry up!-

-Oh. Listen, buddy, we both know you like her. You fucked up, big time, and it’s gonna take a lot to get her to forgive you. You could start by stop being an ass to her and apologize.- Bucky knew the blonde was right. It would take a miracle just to get you to look in his direction, let alone allow him to apologize, but he had to at least try to make things right.

He stood up, startling Steve, and said -you were there for all our rehearsals, right? You know the routine?-

Steve was confused, but answered with a slow -yeah, why?- but Bucky gave no further explanation, too busy picking up all his stuff, and when Steve put together what his friend was hinting at, he said -I didn’t mean right now!-

-No time like the present! Go change- he said, nudging Steve toward the changing rooms. -Buck if you go now Fury’s gonna kill you!-

-I don’t care!- he yelled basically running out the door, ignoring Natasha yelling his name, the only thing on his mind being running to you as fast as he could. 

Every thought in his head, though, was instantly forgotten as he came to a sudden stop at the top of the stairs outside of the rink. There, at the bottom, was you, looking just as shocked at seeing him there as he felt. After a few moments of just looking at each other, you couldn’t take it anymore and decided to break the silence.

-I didn’t know if I should come in. Didn’t know if Nat wanted my support after I was so rude, you know.- when he doesn’t say anything and just stares at you, you feel the need to keep going. -what are you doing out here? Did I miss your turn? How did it go?- that seems to snap him out of it, he starts to move towards you, still not saying anything and making you even more nervous as you start regretting coming here. When he comes face to face with you, finally, he speaks.

-I was gonna come looking for you- your brows furrowed in confusion -why?-

-I have owed you an apology for a long time now. I’m sorry for being a dick to you for all these years… it really wasn’t about you. I just felt insecure and acted out about it, and eventually I felt so used to it I couldn’t help it.- you were shocked to say the least, this was the last thing you were expecting tonight. -you felt insecure? Why?-

-Because you’re you!- he almost yelled, gesturing to your whole body and scaring you a bit. -I mean you’re a Stark, you’re kind of a legend who lives up to the legend. You’re smart and talented and confident and beautiful. I never thought I’d be good enough for you, I still don’t.- you didn’t know what to say, but you weren’t running for the hills so Bcuky kept talking. -I’d also like to make it clear that I’ve never called you incompetent. I was talking about Lang, that idiot took ages to get his keys to drive you to the hospital. I didn’t even realize you might’ve heard me until Steve pointed it out to me just now while we were waiting our turn and I just had to find you and tell you.-

Once everything he said actually registered in your brain, the words came out of your mouth before you could stop them. -wait, you left the competition to come find me? Natasha’s gonna kill you!- he chuckled a little while saying, -I’d be more worried about Fury.-

-Fury? Why would you be worried about Fury?-

-He’s gonna be pissed that I left. He’s the whole reason Romanoff and I trained so hard to make it here, I wanted to skip it after you got hurt, but he said if I did he wouldn’t let me do any more pairs.- You were more confused than ever.

-I thought this competition was important to you, that’s the whole reason I said yes. And you wanted to quit it?-

-it was important because it was my chance to finally spend time with you- he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world -I’d rather not do our routine at all if I can’t do it with you- he adds, shrugging. 

-really?- you couldn’t help but smile at hearing him say ‘our routine’ -you and Nat work much better than you and I do-

-perphabs, but I still think you’re the best there is. Even when it’s with me, a person you hate- he says the last part while looking at his feet, almost afraid of saying it aloud and perfectly aware that he’s the reason why.

-I don’t hate you.- you say, almost too fast. His eyes snap back up to yours. -You don’t? I mean, I wouldn’t blame you if you did. I’d hate me if I were you.-

-sure, I don’t always love the things you say about my skills, but you’ll never criticize me more than I criticize myself. Mostly, you’re just a distraction.- you say shrugging, not fully realizing what you just confessed.

-I distract you?- he says with a smug smirk that kind of makes you want to punch him, bringing his hand to your cheek. You groan but let him keep it there, loving the feeling of his warm skin against yours. -don’t get cocky with me, Barnes- he laughs, but doesn’t say anything else waiting for you to elaborate with an expectant look.

-fine- you sigh -yes, you distract me. You might be a jerk, but I can’t concentrate when I’m around you. All I can think about is the sound of your voice, and the way you smell and the color of your stupid pretty eyes. I can’t help but like you, no matter how much of an asshole you are to me, for reasons I’m sure have something to do with my father.-

He laughs again at your last sentence and you swear you’d never heard a better sound. -so I guess I should be thankful for you daddy issues, huh.- he says making you laugh with him. -yeah, you very much should be.- you put your arms around his neck when his hand drops from your face and his arms wrap around your waist. 

-you distract me too, you know. Everytime you’re in the room you’re all I can see. I’ll never apologize enough for all the things I said to you, but let me try. Let me take you on a date, for starters.- you pretend to think about it all of two seconds before you’re nodding, so he adds -what about right now?-

-slow down there, Romeo, why don’t we go cheer on our friends first- you giggled at his pout while you took his hand and led the way inside. When you took a seat next to Sam, just in time to hear the announcement of Natasha and Steve’s names, there was no wiping the smile off of Bucky’s face, his arm going immediately around your shoulders to bring you closer as you greeted Sam that had a knowing grin of his own. They watched their friends go through the routine perfectly, to your joy and surprise, you really were proud of them, and you made sure to tell them when they were close enough to the edge of the ice while waiting for their score.

-maybe after we can all go out to eat something- Steve suggested, still slightly out of breath.

-I’m sorry punk, I have a date that I’m not missing for anything in the world- Bucky answered without taking his eyes away from you, his smile seared onto his face. Steve chuckled at how whipped his friend already was, moving closer to the judges with Nat when it was time for their scores. Second place, not bad for a last minute thing. As you cheered for your friends while they were given their medals, Bucky leaned down and whispered in your ear -we would’ve come first-

You burst laughing and Bucky knew at that moment that he would’ve done anything to hear that sweet sound for the rest of his life. You look up at him and raise your voice just enough for him to hear over all the screaming, with a smile big enough to match his -we totally would’ve-

[yourmidnightlover]

AHH THERE’S SO MUCH POSITIVE FEEDBACK FROM THIS FIC THANK YOU ALL SO SO MUCH <3

forever?

pairing: mob!bucky x reader

summary: after being forced into a marriage you didn’t want, you become very cautious of your new husband out of fear of what he’s capable of when one of his employees makes a move at a dinner meeting.

warnings: anxious reader, threat of domestic violence (reader is just worried abt it), groping, please let me know if i missed something or need to add anything!

a/n: reader is very timid in this. i know a lot of people like a reader who doesn’t take shit and stands up for herself, but i often find myself in situations where i just shut down and don’t know how to respond… so this is kinda inspired by that feeling

two months out of forever.

two months of what seemed like wedded bliss from the outside.

in reality, that “bliss” included sleeping in separate rooms, never even seeing each other unless necessary to make appearances for either of your parents. 

the ones who arranged for this to happen in the first place. 

you were just glad you were able to have your time for yourself. you thought you would use the time to continue writing for your book, but you’ve hit a serious case of writers block. so lovely. 

on the bright side, he wasn’t as controlling as your few friends had made it seem he would be. 

they had painted this picture of a monster in your head. a man who would loom over your presence during every waking second. a man who was controlling and wouldn’t let you have a personal life or secrets.

so far, he’s been the opposite. 

for some reason, that still leaves you unsteady. 

because they also painted him in a very violent, angry, red light. 

but maybe he had a mistress. if that were the case, he truly didn��t respect you or your family. it didn’t seem like bucky to do that, though. he wouldn’t ruin a business deal that benefitted him so much. 

the reason you married him was because your father’s finance business was going under, drowned in debts while the only options were to sell to the barnes’ or the rumlow’s. the barnes’ seemed the lesser of two evils.

the only way to smoothly transition your father’s business to be under the barnes’ control without raising any question of your father’s capability was to marry. if any questions were asked about why your father sold his company, the not so good side of the finance industry would trample after your entire family. the barnes’ would get a new company and their many clients, while your family wouldn’t become entirely blacklisted by the entire country, would be putting your family under the barnes’ protection, and there would be less questions asked as to why the company had been merged.

you had a few months of “leaking” images of you and bucky together into the tabloids to prepare the public for the news of such a big marriage. some were photos of you and bucky holding hands while walking. a couple of you at a restaurant smiling. a few staged kissing photos… those may or may not have been your favorite.

those times spent with him, in all honesty, weren’t bad at all. going for walks together at sunset, dinner dates, feeling his lips against yours…

you had gotten to know more about his childhood that the tabloids didn’t feel was important to cover. his favorite subject in school and how he actually lost his arm so many years ago. you learned each others’ fears and worries in life. your favorite thing to learn about him, however, was what he truly wanted in life. 

peace.

a couple weeks after the wedding, a few photos of the reception were once again “leaked” in order to sell the “too in love to wait” bit that everyone had started assuming upon seeing the first few photos of you and bucky together. 

but all of your history with him flew to the back of your mind as bucky knocked on your office door. 

“come in,” you replied hesitantly, not sure what he wanted from you for the first time since your wedding. he stepped through the threshold and stood at the doorframe. 

“there’s a work meeting tomorrow,” his hand remained on the doorknob, so stiff you’d think he might rip it off the precious white wood in seconds. “the men are meeting at the house. i wanted to let you know. the men in this business, they expect marriages to be of the… traditional values.”

you nodded with understanding, turning to face him with a forced grin. “so i should play the part of the doting housewife, huh?” no smile in return, so you bit back your humor in turn for matching his serious tone. “what food should i prepare, then? and uh, how many guests will we be expecting?”

“whatever’s easiest for you,” he shrugged lightly. “there will be 9 of us there.” with one final look in your direction, he left the office and didn’t return to say goodnight. 

-

the next morning you got to work setting the house up for the 6pm meeting your loving husband was hosting. 

you had decided to set up a buffet-style table outside of the main dining room where the meeting would take place. for the menu, you settled on simple grilled chicken with quite a few side options. roast potatoes, asparagus, sauteed carrots, green beans, and rolls. 

you were putting the rolls in the oven when bucky got home, seemingly entranced by the smell of all the food, heading straight to the kitchen.

“it smells amazing in here,” bucky called from the archway of the kitchen. you jumped slightly from the surprise, but swallowed down the shock and another weak smile. 

“thanks,” you nodded to the edge of the island where a large chalkboard sat, your handwriting neatly displayed on the board that listed all the food to be had. “the menu. i figured a variety would be nice, and who doesn’t like chicken, right?”

“vegetarians,” if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was telling a joke. but you knew better than that. “the men are coming in a little less than an hour. do you maybe want to change before they get here?”

you looked down at what you were wearing, a pair of blue jeans and a loose t-shirt clearly not worthy of someone who had married a barnes man. “right, of course. i’m sorry,” you finished setting the timer on the oven and ran upstairs to get yourself put together before bucky saw the tears trying to seep past your waterline. 

you settled on a black cocktail dress you had worn to one of your dad’s company events before the downfall… quickly swiping some makeup on to cover the exhaustion in your eyes and pulling your hair up to a more respectable updo rather than your typical messy bun. 

luckily you had become an expert at quickly getting ready from your time in university, as you were back in time to pull the rolls from the oven, but not before pulling on your apron. you’d be dammed if you got this stunning dress dirty right before this prestigious meeting. 

t-5 minutes before the meeting was supposed to begin and you could already hear lots of rustling from the formal dining room. you knocked on the closed doors before bucky opened the door for you. 

the men went silent as their gaze rested on you in the doorway. 

“the foods ready. buffet style?” your eyes didn’t leave bucky’s pretty blues, too scared to do anything wrong in front of his men. 

“that’s perfect, my love,” his hands gravitated to your waist before pulling your body taut against his, one hand moving a stray hair behind your ear before leaning in to whisper. “you look ravishing…”

as he pulled back, you were sure your blush was evident across your cheeks. you tried to hide it behind a smile, shrugging with a shy ‘thanks’ leaving your lips. 

“what do you say to my stunning wife, boys?” his hand squeezed your waist once more before turning to the other men, ‘thank you’s being echoed throughout the room as they stood and made their way to the kitchen to make their plates. 

in a matter of minutes, all the food was gone. you figured it was best they liked the food, even if you didn’t get to try any of it yourself like you had planned. 

you got started on cleaning everything up with earbuds in your ears, starting with the dishes already in the sink from when you were cooking. then, you were sure to place the dishes that the food was in inside the sink for you to clean before starting on wiping the counters, then sweeping, then mopping, and then back to the dishes. 

you didn’t realize that bucky had called for a break in the meeting, however. you were in for quite the rude awakening when you felt a pair of hands on your waist, but not the ones you were semi-familiar with. 

you turned around with a gasp, shock evident on your face as you tried to piece together whoever this man was. blond hair, blue eyes… definitely not steve though. you knew steve well and had seen him often. 

you pulled your earbuds from your ears in attempt to better understand what was going on. his hands were still gripping your sides, but you couldn’t necessarily escape his touch. you were backed against the sink. even if you could fight him, you’d likely lose to his strong grip. 

“is the meeting-is it over already?” your voice was so much more cowardly than you’d ever expected yourself to be. 

“no, no,” he shook his head. “just a little break, some of the guys were getting antsy.” you leaned back further, trying to create some semblance of space between you. “i figured i’d say a special thank you, on behalf of all of us guys in there.” he let one hand cup the side of your face and neck, his other hand trailing down from your waist, firmly grasping your ass with a sqeeze before you jumped at the invasion.

“i don’t-i’ve got it…”

“john,” he smiled grossly, as if he could convince you to go to bed with him.

“no need for a thanks,” you tried to remind him. “i did this for bucky. for my husband.” your eyebrows rose, trying to emphasize that his boss was also your husband. 

“i’m sure he won’t mind you getting a little bit of extra special attention, don’t you?”

then, a growling voice cut through the fear running through your veins. 

“i think he might mind.”

you turned to face bucky with wide eyes before facing john, wishing the tears welling in your eyes would just go away. 

his hands slowly retracted, stepping back with a chuckle.

“sorry, sir,” he smiled before turning to face your husband. “she was just telling me how she wanted some extra attention, weren’t you, toots?” he tilted his head expectantly.

your mouth opened, nothing leaving in spite of your brain screaming at you. what would bucky do? would he take his side? would he believe you? would he hurt you? 

you’ve embarrassed him now… humiliated him in his own home. surely he’ll take action against you for this. 

your mind replayed stories your old friends had told you about him. how he would lash out at men that betrayed him. how he never took shit from anyone who showed him any disrespect. how he was the kind of man to shoot first and ask quesitons later.

and now, in a way, you’ve both betrayed and disrespected him. or at least, that’s what he’ll think. 

you didn’t even realize tears were flowing down your face until your sobs were interrupted. 

“enough!” you finally looked at bucky before his eyes softened for a second before walking closer to you. “go to the room.” he ordered sternly. 

“but the dish-”

“i’ll take care of it,” he interrupted gravely, “go. to. the. room.” 

“yes, sir,” you nodded and swiftly left the room entirely, collapsing against the door once you had shut it, sobs wracking your body. you held your knees against your chest before trying to regulate your breathing.

he won’t hurt you.

he has to protect his image.

you’ve embarrassed him.

you’re his wife.

you’re his business deal.

you’ve humiliated him.

he’ll hurt you.

you didn’t know how long it had been since the incident. 

your sobs had subsided. you had, at some point, moved to your bed. you were still rocking your body back and forth, trying to self sooth. 

and then there was a knock at the door. 

your body instinctively jumped at the sudden noise, although it wasn’t harsh in any manner, at least not one that you were expecting. 

he twisted the knob, slowly opening the door with slow movements. 

“i-i’m so sorry,” you began apologizing as soon as he stepped through the threshold into your room. “i swear-i swear i didn’t tell him that. i didn’t even realize he was there, i promise. i wouldn’t lie to you. i’m so sorry, i’m so sorry. please believe me.” your body was still rocking and you didn’t even notice he was as close to you as he was until you saw his hand moving by your head.

automatically, you assumed the absolute worst, your head ducking into your body like a fucking turtle, the meekest squeal leaving your lips mixed with a sob. your arms went over your head protectively, as if a bomb were about to go off.

“sweetheart,” his voice sounded so broken, so torn, so unexpectedly soft. 

you finally looked at him for the first time since he came in your room. his flesh hand was holding his metal one as if it were something that could kill. in ways, it was. 

“you-there’s no need to…” after looking at him for a second longer, you noticed that his eyes had tears that almost mirrored your own. “i would never, ever lay a hand on you. i’m so sorry for scaring you. i can’t…” he sighed. “i can’t believe i made you believe i’d ever hurt you.”

“i’m sorry,” you pleaded with him once again. 

“you have nothing to apologize for,” he hesitated to reach for your hands before settling on simply grabbing a spare pillow. “i came up here to apologize. for my tone earlier… i know john. he never knows his boundaries. i should’ve… you never should’ve been put in that situation. that’s my fault. that’s on me. and i will spend the rest of forever to make it up to you.” 

“you don’t have to-”

“no, my love,” he shook his head. “can i-can i hold your hands? please?” you, without hesitation, grabbed his hands yourself. “i need to make it up to you. you’re mine. you’re my wife. it’s my job to protect you, to keep you safe. and to have someone ruin that? to touch what’s mine in my own home? i’m so sorry.” he brought your hands to his lips, pressing at least ten kisses to each hand. he was so gentle and careful it was a good thing you knew better than to think it actually meant anything.

you were surprised, to say the least, at how tender he was being with you. 

how could you have ever thought he would hurt you? that he would raise his hand and swing? that he would cause you harm? he was here declaring that he would make up this incident for the rest of eternity when it wasn’t even his doing… 

“will you stay with me tonight?” his eyes lit up at the request.

“are you sure you want that?” he became a touch more reserved. “i don’t know if it’s a good idea since you were worried i would…” his voice trailed off.

“i’m sure,” you nodded before scooting over in the bed. 

sure, your marriage was arranged and didn’t stem from true love. you may not have talked outside of when absolutely necessary. you might have even been terrified of him at one point. 

but now, the thought of forever with bucky barnes didn’t seem half bad. 

[yourmidnightlover]

rereading this entire masterlist bc everything is spectacular

Marvelous Lizzie’s Masterlist

DISCLAIMER

All of my work is intended for readers above 18+. MINORS DNI. Please read the warnings before starting the story. I take no responsibility if you skip the warnings.

All my stories are organized from oldest to newest in each category.

You can find all my work also on my ao3 account.

🔥 - Smut 💔 - Angst 🌸 - Fluff

Bucky Barnes x Reader

i wanna ruin our friendship 🔥 💔🌸 Celebrity!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

are you mine? 🔥 💔 Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

just let me make you feel better 🔥🌸 Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

unconventional methods [complete] 🔥💔 Avengers!Bucky Barnes x Adult Content Creator!Reader

no one else matters 🔥 Avenger!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader, Steve Rogers x Female Reader (in the past)

you're my desire series [complete]- co-written with @notafunkiller 🔥🌸 40s!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

love me like you paid me - co-written with @notafunkiller 🔥🌸💔 Dilf!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

not a study date - 🔥🌸💔 College!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

you’re stuck with me - co-written with @notafunkiller 🔥💔 Revenge Sex!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

you were mine just yesterday - co-written with @notafunkiller 🔥💔 Ex Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Lonely Night series [Complete] - 🔥 Roommate!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Like Someone I Know -🔥 A Little Sequal 🌸 College!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Why Are You Doing This To Me? - 💔 Ex!Rockstar!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Pretty Little Thing - co-written with @notafunkiller 🔥 Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Matt Murdock x Jennifer Walters

one thing leads to another - on ao3 🔥 

better than I imagined - 🔥 

Updated: 04.10.2023

[yourmidnightlover]

… just felt like we all needed a reminder that this gif of sebastian existed…

[yourmidnightlover]

forever?

pairing: mob!bucky x reader

summary: after being forced into a marriage you didn’t want, you become very cautious of your new husband out of fear of what he’s capable of when one of his employees makes a move at a dinner meeting.

warnings: anxious reader, threat of domestic violence (reader is just worried abt it), groping, please let me know if i missed something or need to add anything!

a/n: reader is very timid in this. i know a lot of people like a reader who doesn’t take shit and stands up for herself, but i often find myself in situations where i just shut down and don’t know how to respond… so this is kinda inspired by that feeling

two months out of forever.

two months of what seemed like wedded bliss from the outside.

in reality, that “bliss” included sleeping in separate rooms, never even seeing each other unless necessary to make appearances for either of your parents. 

the ones who arranged for this to happen in the first place. 

you were just glad you were able to have your time for yourself. you thought you would use the time to continue writing for your book, but you’ve hit a serious case of writers block. so lovely. 

on the bright side, he wasn’t as controlling as your few friends had made it seem he would be. 

they had painted this picture of a monster in your head. a man who would loom over your presence during every waking second. a man who was controlling and wouldn’t let you have a personal life or secrets.

so far, he’s been the opposite. 

for some reason, that still leaves you unsteady. 

because they also painted him in a very violent, angry, red light. 

but maybe he had a mistress. if that were the case, he truly didn’t respect you or your family. it didn’t seem like bucky to do that, though. he wouldn’t ruin a business deal that benefitted him so much. 

the reason you married him was because your father’s finance business was going under, drowned in debts while the only options were to sell to the barnes’ or the rumlow’s. the barnes’ seemed the lesser of two evils.

the only way to smoothly transition your father’s business to be under the barnes’ control without raising any question of your father’s capability was to marry. if any questions were asked about why your father sold his company, the not so good side of the finance industry would trample after your entire family. the barnes’ would get a new company and their many clients, while your family wouldn’t become entirely blacklisted by the entire country, would be putting your family under the barnes’ protection, and there would be less questions asked as to why the company had been merged.

you had a few months of “leaking” images of you and bucky together into the tabloids to prepare the public for the news of such a big marriage. some were photos of you and bucky holding hands while walking. a couple of you at a restaurant smiling. a few staged kissing photos… those may or may not have been your favorite.

those times spent with him, in all honesty, weren’t bad at all. going for walks together at sunset, dinner dates, feeling his lips against yours…

you had gotten to know more about his childhood that the tabloids didn’t feel was important to cover. his favorite subject in school and how he actually lost his arm so many years ago. you learned each others’ fears and worries in life. your favorite thing to learn about him, however, was what he truly wanted in life. 

peace.

a couple weeks after the wedding, a few photos of the reception were once again “leaked” in order to sell the “too in love to wait” bit that everyone had started assuming upon seeing the first few photos of you and bucky together. 

but all of your history with him flew to the back of your mind as bucky knocked on your office door. 

“come in,” you replied hesitantly, not sure what he wanted from you for the first time since your wedding. he stepped through the threshold and stood at the doorframe. 

“there’s a work meeting tomorrow,” his hand remained on the doorknob, so stiff you’d think he might rip it off the precious white wood in seconds. “the men are meeting at the house. i wanted to let you know. the men in this business, they expect marriages to be of the… traditional values.”

you nodded with understanding, turning to face him with a forced grin. “so i should play the part of the doting housewife, huh?” no smile in return, so you bit back your humor in turn for matching his serious tone. “what food should i prepare, then? and uh, how many guests will we be expecting?”

“whatever’s easiest for you,” he shrugged lightly. “there will be 9 of us there.” with one final look in your direction, he left the office and didn’t return to say goodnight. 

-

the next morning you got to work setting the house up for the 6pm meeting your loving husband was hosting. 

you had decided to set up a buffet-style table outside of the main dining room where the meeting would take place. for the menu, you settled on simple grilled chicken with quite a few side options. roast potatoes, asparagus, sauteed carrots, green beans, and rolls. 

you were putting the rolls in the oven when bucky got home, seemingly entranced by the smell of all the food, heading straight to the kitchen.

“it smells amazing in here,” bucky called from the archway of the kitchen. you jumped slightly from the surprise, but swallowed down the shock and another weak smile. 

“thanks,” you nodded to the edge of the island where a large chalkboard sat, your handwriting neatly displayed on the board that listed all the food to be had. “the menu. i figured a variety would be nice, and who doesn’t like chicken, right?”

“vegetarians,” if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was telling a joke. but you knew better than that. “the men are coming in a little less than an hour. do you maybe want to change before they get here?”

you looked down at what you were wearing, a pair of blue jeans and a loose t-shirt clearly not worthy of someone who had married a barnes man. “right, of course. i’m sorry,” you finished setting the timer on the oven and ran upstairs to get yourself put together before bucky saw the tears trying to seep past your waterline. 

you settled on a black cocktail dress you had worn to one of your dad’s company events before the downfall… quickly swiping some makeup on to cover the exhaustion in your eyes and pulling your hair up to a more respectable updo rather than your typical messy bun. 

luckily you had become an expert at quickly getting ready from your time in university, as you were back in time to pull the rolls from the oven, but not before pulling on your apron. you’d be dammed if you got this stunning dress dirty right before this prestigious meeting. 

t-5 minutes before the meeting was supposed to begin and you could already hear lots of rustling from the formal dining room. you knocked on the closed doors before bucky opened the door for you. 

the men went silent as their gaze rested on you in the doorway. 

“the foods ready. buffet style?” your eyes didn’t leave bucky’s pretty blues, too scared to do anything wrong in front of his men. 

“that’s perfect, my love,” his hands gravitated to your waist before pulling your body taut against his, one hand moving a stray hair behind your ear before leaning in to whisper. “you look ravishing…”

as he pulled back, you were sure your blush was evident across your cheeks. you tried to hide it behind a smile, shrugging with a shy ‘thanks’ leaving your lips. 

“what do you say to my stunning wife, boys?” his hand squeezed your waist once more before turning to the other men, ‘thank you’s being echoed throughout the room as they stood and made their way to the kitchen to make their plates. 

in a matter of minutes, all the food was gone. you figured it was best they liked the food, even if you didn’t get to try any of it yourself like you had planned. 

you got started on cleaning everything up with earbuds in your ears, starting with the dishes already in the sink from when you were cooking. then, you were sure to place the dishes that the food was in inside the sink for you to clean before starting on wiping the counters, then sweeping, then mopping, and then back to the dishes. 

you didn’t realize that bucky had called for a break in the meeting, however. you were in for quite the rude awakening when you felt a pair of hands on your waist, but not the ones you were semi-familiar with. 

you turned around with a gasp, shock evident on your face as you tried to piece together whoever this man was. blond hair, blue eyes… definitely not steve though. you knew steve well and had seen him often. 

you pulled your earbuds from your ears in attempt to better understand what was going on. his hands were still gripping your sides, but you couldn’t necessarily escape his touch. you were backed against the sink. even if you could fight him, you’d likely lose to his strong grip. 

“is the meeting-is it over already?” your voice was so much more cowardly than you’d ever expected yourself to be. 

“no, no,” he shook his head. “just a little break, some of the guys were getting antsy.” you leaned back further, trying to create some semblance of space between you. “i figured i’d say a special thank you, on behalf of all of us guys in there.” he let one hand cup the side of your face and neck, his other hand trailing down from your waist, firmly grasping your ass with a sqeeze before you jumped at the invasion.

“i don’t-i’ve got it…”

“john,” he smiled grossly, as if he could convince you to go to bed with him.

“no need for a thanks,” you tried to remind him. “i did this for bucky. for my husband.” your eyebrows rose, trying to emphasize that his boss was also your husband. 

“i’m sure he won’t mind you getting a little bit of extra special attention, don’t you?”

then, a growling voice cut through the fear running through your veins. 

“i think he might mind.”

you turned to face bucky with wide eyes before facing john, wishing the tears welling in your eyes would just go away. 

his hands slowly retracted, stepping back with a chuckle.

“sorry, sir,” he smiled before turning to face your husband. “she was just telling me how she wanted some extra attention, weren’t you, toots?” he tilted his head expectantly.

your mouth opened, nothing leaving in spite of your brain screaming at you. what would bucky do? would he take his side? would he believe you? would he hurt you? 

you’ve embarrassed him now… humiliated him in his own home. surely he’ll take action against you for this. 

your mind replayed stories your old friends had told you about him. how he would lash out at men that betrayed him. how he never took shit from anyone who showed him any disrespect. how he was the kind of man to shoot first and ask quesitons later.

and now, in a way, you’ve both betrayed and disrespected him. or at least, that’s what he’ll think. 

you didn’t even realize tears were flowing down your face until your sobs were interrupted. 

“enough!” you finally looked at bucky before his eyes softened for a second before walking closer to you. “go to the room.” he ordered sternly. 

“but the dish-”

“i’ll take care of it,” he interrupted gravely, “go. to. the. room.” 

“yes, sir,” you nodded and swiftly left the room entirely, collapsing against the door once you had shut it, sobs wracking your body. you held your knees against your chest before trying to regulate your breathing.

he won’t hurt you.

he has to protect his image.

you’ve embarrassed him.

you’re his wife.

you’re his business deal.

you’ve humiliated him.

he’ll hurt you.

you didn’t know how long it had been since the incident. 

your sobs had subsided. you had, at some point, moved to your bed. you were still rocking your body back and forth, trying to self sooth. 

and then there was a knock at the door. 

your body instinctively jumped at the sudden noise, although it wasn’t harsh in any manner, at least not one that you were expecting. 

he twisted the knob, slowly opening the door with slow movements. 

“i-i’m so sorry,” you began apologizing as soon as he stepped through the threshold into your room. “i swear-i swear i didn’t tell him that. i didn’t even realize he was there, i promise. i wouldn’t lie to you. i’m so sorry, i’m so sorry. please believe me.” your body was still rocking and you didn’t even notice he was as close to you as he was until you saw his hand moving by your head.

automatically, you assumed the absolute worst, your head ducking into your body like a fucking turtle, the meekest squeal leaving your lips mixed with a sob. your arms went over your head protectively, as if a bomb were about to go off.

“sweetheart,” his voice sounded so broken, so torn, so unexpectedly soft. 

you finally looked at him for the first time since he came in your room. his flesh hand was holding his metal one as if it were something that could kill. in ways, it was. 

“you-there’s no need to…” after looking at him for a second longer, you noticed that his eyes had tears that almost mirrored your own. “i would never, ever lay a hand on you. i’m so sorry for scaring you. i can’t…” he sighed. “i can’t believe i made you believe i’d ever hurt you.”

“i’m sorry,” you pleaded with him once again. 

“you have nothing to apologize for,” he hesitated to reach for your hands before settling on simply grabbing a spare pillow. “i came up here to apologize. for my tone earlier… i know john. he never knows his boundaries. i should’ve… you never should’ve been put in that situation. that’s my fault. that’s on me. and i will spend the rest of forever to make it up to you.” 

“you don’t have to-”

“no, my love,” he shook his head. “can i-can i hold your hands? please?” you, without hesitation, grabbed his hands yourself. “i need to make it up to you. you’re mine. you’re my wife. it’s my job to protect you, to keep you safe. and to have someone ruin that? to touch what’s mine in my own home? i’m so sorry.” he brought your hands to his lips, pressing at least ten kisses to each hand. he was so gentle and careful it was a good thing you knew better than to think it actually meant anything.

you were surprised, to say the least, at how tender he was being with you. 

how could you have ever thought he would hurt you? that he would raise his hand and swing? that he would cause you harm? he was here declaring that he would make up this incident for the rest of eternity when it wasn’t even his doing… 

“will you stay with me tonight?” his eyes lit up at the request.

“are you sure you want that?” he became a touch more reserved. “i don’t know if it’s a good idea since you were worried i would…” his voice trailed off.

“i’m sure,” you nodded before scooting over in the bed. 

sure, your marriage was arranged and didn’t stem from true love. you may not have talked outside of when absolutely necessary. you might have even been terrified of him at one point. 

but now, the thought of forever with bucky barnes didn’t seem half bad. 

[yourmidnightlover]

... posted :)

lol i just wrote a little arranged marriage mob!bucky oneshot that i MIGHT be able to push out tmr…

we shall see :)

[yourmidnightlover]

forever?

pairing: mob!bucky x reader

summary: after being forced into a marriage you didn’t want, you become very cautious of your new husband out of fear of what he’s capable of when one of his employees makes a move at a dinner meeting.

warnings: anxious reader, threat of domestic violence (reader is just worried abt it), groping, please let me know if i missed something or need to add anything!

a/n: reader is very timid in this. i know a lot of people like a reader who doesn’t take shit and stands up for herself, but i often find myself in situations where i just shut down and don’t know how to respond… so this is kinda inspired by that feeling

two months out of forever.

two months of what seemed like wedded bliss from the outside.

in reality, that “bliss” included sleeping in separate rooms, never even seeing each other unless necessary to make appearances for either of your parents. 

the ones who arranged for this to happen in the first place. 

you were just glad you were able to have your time for yourself. you thought you would use the time to continue writing for your book, but you’ve hit a serious case of writers block. so lovely. 

on the bright side, he wasn’t as controlling as your few friends had made it seem he would be. 

they had painted this picture of a monster in your head. a man who would loom over your presence during every waking second. a man who was controlling and wouldn’t let you have a personal life or secrets.

so far, he’s been the opposite. 

for some reason, that still leaves you unsteady. 

because they also painted him in a very violent, angry, red light. 

but maybe he had a mistress. if that were the case, he truly didn’t respect you or your family. it didn’t seem like bucky to do that, though. he wouldn’t ruin a business deal that benefitted him so much. 

the reason you married him was because your father’s finance business was going under, drowned in debts while the only options were to sell to the barnes’ or the rumlow’s. the barnes’ seemed the lesser of two evils.

the only way to smoothly transition your father’s business to be under the barnes’ control without raising any question of your father’s capability was to marry. if any questions were asked about why your father sold his company, the not so good side of the finance industry would trample after your entire family. the barnes’ would get a new company and their many clients, while your family wouldn’t become entirely blacklisted by the entire country, would be putting your family under the barnes’ protection, and there would be less questions asked as to why the company had been merged.

you had a few months of “leaking” images of you and bucky together into the tabloids to prepare the public for the news of such a big marriage. some were photos of you and bucky holding hands while walking. a couple of you at a restaurant smiling. a few staged kissing photos… those may or may not have been your favorite.

those times spent with him, in all honesty, weren’t bad at all. going for walks together at sunset, dinner dates, feeling his lips against yours…

you had gotten to know more about his childhood that the tabloids didn’t feel was important to cover. his favorite subject in school and how he actually lost his arm so many years ago. you learned each others’ fears and worries in life. your favorite thing to learn about him, however, was what he truly wanted in life. 

peace.

a couple weeks after the wedding, a few photos of the reception were once again “leaked” in order to sell the “too in love to wait” bit that everyone had started assuming upon seeing the first few photos of you and bucky together. 

but all of your history with him flew to the back of your mind as bucky knocked on your office door. 

“come in,” you replied hesitantly, not sure what he wanted from you for the first time since your wedding. he stepped through the threshold and stood at the doorframe. 

“there’s a work meeting tomorrow,” his hand remained on the doorknob, so stiff you’d think he might rip it off the precious white wood in seconds. “the men are meeting at the house. i wanted to let you know. the men in this business, they expect marriages to be of the… traditional values.”

you nodded with understanding, turning to face him with a forced grin. “so i should play the part of the doting housewife, huh?” no smile in return, so you bit back your humor in turn for matching his serious tone. “what food should i prepare, then? and uh, how many guests will we be expecting?”

“whatever’s easiest for you,” he shrugged lightly. “there will be 9 of us there.” with one final look in your direction, he left the office and didn’t return to say goodnight. 

-

the next morning you got to work setting the house up for the 6pm meeting your loving husband was hosting. 

you had decided to set up a buffet-style table outside of the main dining room where the meeting would take place. for the menu, you settled on simple grilled chicken with quite a few side options. roast potatoes, asparagus, sauteed carrots, green beans, and rolls. 

you were putting the rolls in the oven when bucky got home, seemingly entranced by the smell of all the food, heading straight to the kitchen.

“it smells amazing in here,” bucky called from the archway of the kitchen. you jumped slightly from the surprise, but swallowed down the shock and another weak smile. 

“thanks,” you nodded to the edge of the island where a large chalkboard sat, your handwriting neatly displayed on the board that listed all the food to be had. “the menu. i figured a variety would be nice, and who doesn’t like chicken, right?”

“vegetarians,” if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was telling a joke. but you knew better than that. “the men are coming in a little less than an hour. do you maybe want to change before they get here?”

you looked down at what you were wearing, a pair of blue jeans and a loose t-shirt clearly not worthy of someone who had married a barnes man. “right, of course. i’m sorry,” you finished setting the timer on the oven and ran upstairs to get yourself put together before bucky saw the tears trying to seep past your waterline. 

you settled on a black cocktail dress you had worn to one of your dad’s company events before the downfall… quickly swiping some makeup on to cover the exhaustion in your eyes and pulling your hair up to a more respectable updo rather than your typical messy bun. 

luckily you had become an expert at quickly getting ready from your time in university, as you were back in time to pull the rolls from the oven, but not before pulling on your apron. you’d be dammed if you got this stunning dress dirty right before this prestigious meeting. 

t-5 minutes before the meeting was supposed to begin and you could already hear lots of rustling from the formal dining room. you knocked on the closed doors before bucky opened the door for you. 

the men went silent as their gaze rested on you in the doorway. 

“the foods ready. buffet style?” your eyes didn’t leave bucky’s pretty blues, too scared to do anything wrong in front of his men. 

“that’s perfect, my love,” his hands gravitated to your waist before pulling your body taut against his, one hand moving a stray hair behind your ear before leaning in to whisper. “you look ravishing…”

as he pulled back, you were sure your blush was evident across your cheeks. you tried to hide it behind a smile, shrugging with a shy ‘thanks’ leaving your lips. 

“what do you say to my stunning wife, boys?” his hand squeezed your waist once more before turning to the other men, ‘thank you’s being echoed throughout the room as they stood and made their way to the kitchen to make their plates. 

in a matter of minutes, all the food was gone. you figured it was best they liked the food, even if you didn’t get to try any of it yourself like you had planned. 

you got started on cleaning everything up with earbuds in your ears, starting with the dishes already in the sink from when you were cooking. then, you were sure to place the dishes that the food was in inside the sink for you to clean before starting on wiping the counters, then sweeping, then mopping, and then back to the dishes. 

you didn’t realize that bucky had called for a break in the meeting, however. you were in for quite the rude awakening when you felt a pair of hands on your waist, but not the ones you were semi-familiar with. 

you turned around with a gasp, shock evident on your face as you tried to piece together whoever this man was. blond hair, blue eyes… definitely not steve though. you knew steve well and had seen him often. 

you pulled your earbuds from your ears in attempt to better understand what was going on. his hands were still gripping your sides, but you couldn’t necessarily escape his touch. you were backed against the sink. even if you could fight him, you’d likely lose to his strong grip. 

“is the meeting-is it over already?” your voice was so much more cowardly than you’d ever expected yourself to be. 

“no, no,” he shook his head. “just a little break, some of the guys were getting antsy.” you leaned back further, trying to create some semblance of space between you. “i figured i’d say a special thank you, on behalf of all of us guys in there.” he let one hand cup the side of your face and neck, his other hand trailing down from your waist, firmly grasping your ass with a sqeeze before you jumped at the invasion.

“i don’t-i’ve got it…”

“john,” he smiled grossly, as if he could convince you to go to bed with him.

“no need for a thanks,” you tried to remind him. “i did this for bucky. for my husband.” your eyebrows rose, trying to emphasize that his boss was also your husband. 

“i’m sure he won’t mind you getting a little bit of extra special attention, don’t you?”

then, a growling voice cut through the fear running through your veins. 

“i think he might mind.”

you turned to face bucky with wide eyes before facing john, wishing the tears welling in your eyes would just go away. 

his hands slowly retracted, stepping back with a chuckle.

“sorry, sir,” he smiled before turning to face your husband. “she was just telling me how she wanted some extra attention, weren’t you, toots?” he tilted his head expectantly.

your mouth opened, nothing leaving in spite of your brain screaming at you. what would bucky do? would he take his side? would he believe you? would he hurt you? 

you’ve embarrassed him now… humiliated him in his own home. surely he’ll take action against you for this. 

your mind replayed stories your old friends had told you about him. how he would lash out at men that betrayed him. how he never took shit from anyone who showed him any disrespect. how he was the kind of man to shoot first and ask quesitons later.

and now, in a way, you’ve both betrayed and disrespected him. or at least, that’s what he’ll think. 

you didn’t even realize tears were flowing down your face until your sobs were interrupted. 

“enough!” you finally looked at bucky before his eyes softened for a second before walking closer to you. “go to the room.” he ordered sternly. 

“but the dish-”

“i’ll take care of it,” he interrupted gravely, “go. to. the. room.” 

“yes, sir,” you nodded and swiftly left the room entirely, collapsing against the door once you had shut it, sobs wracking your body. you held your knees against your chest before trying to regulate your breathing.

he won’t hurt you.

he has to protect his image.

you’ve embarrassed him.

you’re his wife.

you’re his business deal.

you’ve humiliated him.

he’ll hurt you.

you didn’t know how long it had been since the incident. 

your sobs had subsided. you had, at some point, moved to your bed. you were still rocking your body back and forth, trying to self sooth. 

and then there was a knock at the door. 

your body instinctively jumped at the sudden noise, although it wasn’t harsh in any manner, at least not one that you were expecting. 

he twisted the knob, slowly opening the door with slow movements. 

“i-i’m so sorry,” you began apologizing as soon as he stepped through the threshold into your room. “i swear-i swear i didn’t tell him that. i didn’t even realize he was there, i promise. i wouldn’t lie to you. i’m so sorry, i’m so sorry. please believe me.” your body was still rocking and you didn’t even notice he was as close to you as he was until you saw his hand moving by your head.

automatically, you assumed the absolute worst, your head ducking into your body like a fucking turtle, the meekest squeal leaving your lips mixed with a sob. your arms went over your head protectively, as if a bomb were about to go off.

“sweetheart,” his voice sounded so broken, so torn, so unexpectedly soft. 

you finally looked at him for the first time since he came in your room. his flesh hand was holding his metal one as if it were something that could kill. in ways, it was. 

“you-there’s no need to…” after looking at him for a second longer, you noticed that his eyes had tears that almost mirrored your own. “i would never, ever lay a hand on you. i’m so sorry for scaring you. i can’t…” he sighed. “i can’t believe i made you believe i’d ever hurt you.”

“i’m sorry,” you pleaded with him once again. 

“you have nothing to apologize for,” he hesitated to reach for your hands before settling on simply grabbing a spare pillow. “i came up here to apologize. for my tone earlier… i know john. he never knows his boundaries. i should’ve… you never should’ve been put in that situation. that’s my fault. that’s on me. and i will spend the rest of forever to make it up to you.” 

“you don’t have to-”

“no, my love,” he shook his head. “can i-can i hold your hands? please?” you, without hesitation, grabbed his hands yourself. “i need to make it up to you. you’re mine. you’re my wife. it’s my job to protect you, to keep you safe. and to have someone ruin that? to touch what’s mine in my own home? i’m so sorry.” he brought your hands to his lips, pressing at least ten kisses to each hand. he was so gentle and careful it was a good thing you knew better than to think it actually meant anything.

you were surprised, to say the least, at how tender he was being with you. 

how could you have ever thought he would hurt you? that he would raise his hand and swing? that he would cause you harm? he was here declaring that he would make up this incident for the rest of eternity when it wasn’t even his doing… 

“will you stay with me tonight?” his eyes lit up at the request.

“are you sure you want that?” he became a touch more reserved. “i don’t know if it’s a good idea since you were worried i would…” his voice trailed off.

“i’m sure,” you nodded before scooting over in the bed. 

sure, your marriage was arranged and didn’t stem from true love. you may not have talked outside of when absolutely necessary. you might have even been terrified of him at one point. 

but now, the thought of forever with bucky barnes didn’t seem half bad. 

[yourmidnightlover]

lol i just wrote a little arranged marriage mob!bucky oneshot that i MIGHT be able to push out tmr…

we shall see :)

[yourmidnightlover]

THIS IS OUR MOMENT ARE YOU KIDDING ME IM SOBBING

Dimensional Pain

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 3363

Warnings: Angst, minor violence, fluff, implied smut.

Squares filled: Heartbreak for @star-spangled-bingo. 

A/N: This is for the HBC’s @the-ss-horniest-book-club Drunk Drabbles / Divider by @firefly-graphics

Earth-616

“Everything ready for the test?” Bruce asks as he comes into the lab. 

“Looks like it.” You say. 

“Everything is ready. I’ve figured this thing out down to the molecular level.” Tony grins. 

You roll your eyes at his overconfidence. The machine was an unknown entity that you thought may be an interstellar communication device but, truthfully, no one knew what it really did. You, Bruce, and Tony had studied each part of it in the lab and, now that you had gleaned all the information you could, the only option left was to run a test. 

“Alright, let’s do this.” You say. 

“The honor is all yours.” Tony grins. 

You switch on the machine with 10% power and look at the readouts, “This is strange.”

“Let’s turn the power up.” Tony says as he turns the dial. “This is fascinating. I’m going to full power.”

Keep reading

[yourmidnightlover]

this made my heart so so warm <3

Hey

Can you write a one shot where Bucky and reader have a daughter. One day when reader and their little daughter are at home and Bucky is at the compound or on a mission, reader accidentally hurts herself. She says something like this to the daughter :"Don't tell daddy." But later when Bucky comes home she says something to Bucky and he immediately gets worried. And then maybe some cuddle time with the Barnes Family.

Thank you in advance 💗

Mommy Hurt » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Pairings: Husband/Dad/Avenger!Bucky Barnes x Wife/Mom!Reader with daughter Daisy

Summary: Bucky gets worried when he finds out from his daughter that Y/N got hurt while he was on a mission.

Warnings: Fluff, language, small injury, brief mention of blood, hugs and kisses, cuddling, uses of nicknames/pet names

A/N: Thank you for requesting @lives-in-midgard 🩵 I had fun writing this🥰

Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes and typos.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators. I found this one on Pinterest.

“Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” Yours and Bucky’s 3 year old daughter Daisy comes running in the kitchen with a piece of paper in her hands. “Look what I draw!” She says, holding the picture up for you to see.

“It’s beautiful, sweetie. Tell me about.” You say, looking down at her.

“This is daddy. This is mommy. This is Pine Pine. This is me.” She says, point to each stick figure in the picture.

You were trying your best to do the dishes and pay attention to what Daisy was saying which probably wasn’t the best idea, because the next thing you know, you felt a sharp pain in your hand. You gasped and dropped the knife you had in your other hand in the sink, clutching your hand in your other one.

“Mommy?” Daisy tapping on your leg. “What happened?” She asks, looking up at you.

“I-I’m fine, baby.” You tried your best to not cry in front of your daughter. “Mommy cut herself.” You tell her.

You slowly opened your hand to see a small cut on the palm of your hand with a little bit of blood coming out of it. You grabbed a kitchen towel that was next to the sink and put it on your hand, applying pressure.

“Mommy have a boo boo?” Daisy asks.

“Just a little one.” You say.

You crouched down to her height and gave her a hug.

“Don’t tell daddy.” You tell her.

“No tell daddy.” She says.

“Good girl.” You smiled and kissed her cheek. “Why don’t you go watch cartoons in the living room and I’ll be there in a few minutes.” You tell her.

“Ok, mommy!” Daisy says, running off to the living room.

You went to the bathroom and got the first aid kit out from underneath the sink. You cleaned out the cut with alcohol and wrapped some gauze around it and taped it with medical tape. You put the first aid kit away and went to the living room to see that Daisy put on Barbie. You took a seat next to her and watched it with her.

A couple days later, Bucky came home from a week long mission. Bucky frowns in confusion when he didn’t see you and Daisy greet him immediately like the two of you normally do.

“Where are my girls?” Bucky’s voice echos through the house.

Bucky heard Daisy’s little footsteps running towards him.

“Daddy!” Daisy says excitedly.

“There’s my baby girl!” Bucky says happily as he picked up Daisy.

Bucky gave her a bunch of hugs and kisses, making her giggle.

“Mommy hurt.” She tells him.

“What?” Bucky felt his heart drop, thinking that something bad happened to you while he was on the mission. “Where is mommy?” He asks her.

“Kitchen.” Daisy says, pointing towards the kitchen.

Bucky walks in the kitchen with Daisy in his arms to see you putting groceries away.

“Bucky, you’re home!” You smile widely and hugged him.

“Are you ok?” Bucky asks with worry in his voice.

“Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?” You asked.

“Daisy told me you got hurt.” He says.

“I told her not to tell you.” You say, looking at your daughter.

“Sowwy, mommy.” Daisy says, feeling bad.

“It’s ok, sweetie.” You say, moving a piece of hair from her face.

Daisy tapped on Bucky’s shoulder, telling him that she wants down. When Bucky put her down, she ran to her play room.

“Show me.” He says.

“Babe, it’s nothing.” You say.

“Doll…” He says.

You sighed and took the gauze off of your left hand and showed him the cut on the palm of your hand that was starting to scab up. Bucky gently took your hand in his and inspected it.

“How did you cut yourself?” Bucky asks.

“I was doing the dishes while looking at a picture Daisy drew and I cut myself with a knife.” You explained.

Bucky felt relieved, knowing that you’re fine. He brought your hand up to his lips and kissed it softly, making you smile. Then he kissed you passionately.

“How about I properly patch up your hand.” Bucky says.

Bucky led you upstairs to yours and his bedroom. You took a seat on the bed while Bucky got the first aid kit from the bathroom. He came out of the bathroom and sat down next to you. He cleaned it with alcohol and wrapped it with gauze, also making sure it wasn’t too tight and tapped it with medical tape. He brought your hand up to his lips again and kissed it softly.

“Better?” Bucky asks.

“All better.” You say, leaning forward to kiss him.

“I’m taking you to the Compound tomorrow so Bruce can take a look at it.” He says.

“Fine.” You say with a playful pout.

Bucky kisses your lips once more, but the kiss was interrupted when Daisy came running in the bedroom.

“Hey!” Daisy shouts, getting yours and Bucky’s attention. “Up!” She says, doing grabby hands at her daddy.

You and Bucky smiled at her cuteness. Bucky picked her up and placed her in between the two of you.

“I draw something!” Daisy shows you and Bucky a picture. “This is daddy. This is mommy. This is Pine Pine. This is me. Me and Pine Pine are superheros like daddy in this one.” She tells you guys.

“It’s beautiful, princess.” Bucky says, kissing the top of her head.

You guys heard Alpine meow loudly as she jumped up on the bed. You guys gave Alpine some lovings before laying down with Daisy in between you and Bucky and Alpine on the pillow next to Bucky’s head.

“I wuv you, daddy. I wuv you, mommy.” Daisy says, kissing yours and Bucky’s cheeks.

“We love you too, baby.” You and Bucky say, kissing her cheeks.

Bucky turned on Barbie for Daisy while you guys cuddled for the rest of the night. Bucky couldn’t ask for anything better than this.

🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

-Bucky’s Doll