1iliketrains1

[1iliketrains1]

hELP

[1iliketrains1]

I'm obsessed with characters we only hear about second or third hand, especially when those accounts are conflicting. No, you don't get to see them, but here's a warped mirror of what other people thought they were. Enjoy your contemplation of how being known is an act of translation and communicates only aspects of the self.

[1iliketrains1]

I’m tired of pretending the funniest line in the series wasn’t said by manfred von karma

[1iliketrains1]

my minecraft dog

[1iliketrains1]

[1iliketrains1]

(guy who literally has easy access to painkillers voice) ough,,, everything aches,,, ouch, if only,,, there was something i could do to stop this,,,,,, guess ill just put up with it,,,,

[1iliketrains1]

my (probably not) unique experience with Spamton, 2021 up to until about a month ago.

Image text (and a bit more elaboration) under the cut cus this is lowkey incomprehensible

--------------------------------

first photo:

Circa 2021 (chapter 2 release):

He’s desperate and lonely. He believes everyone has abandoned him, and maybe they have. He believed a voice on the phone was helping him, but it was using him. It abandoned him, leaving him for dead. 

But he won't let go. He’ll forcefully take all that he deserves, all that he lost and more. and once he’s at the very top, where he belongs, he’ll show them all. They’ll see. They’ll all pay.

me: “Yeah he’s cool, I see why people are losing their mind about him. But he doesn't activate brainworms for me, I still like him tho.”

second photo:

2025 (chapter 3 release):

It wasn't greed. It wasn't selfishness. Not fully. It wasn't just something that happened. It wasn't outside of his control. He tried to see too far, not just because he wanted more. He trusted. He loved. He dared to risk what he had for someone else. That was why he was abandoned by the phone. 

What he had was not for his partner, but he didn't care. He wanted to reach the heavens while holding his hand. He wanted him to see. It was an act of defiance rooted in love that did him in.

He lost it all because he dared to trust. He dared to love. He hated to feel. Back then, If he just didn't feel, he’d still have it all. Back then, If he didn't care, he’d still have the power, he’d still have the phone.

He hates that he had loved enough to risk himself. He hates that he lost. He hates him, not because he abandoned him, but because If HE just didn't exist, if he didn't love him, if he didn't risk it for someone else, he’d still be on top. 

me: "WHAT"

-----------------------------------

Explanation (become insane with me):

It's about the change from "he had no agency in his own demise" (things went well when he had the voice on the phone, then the voice just disappeared. it was outside of his control)

To "his demise was his own doing, his own choice. Moreover, it was a choice made in a rare moment of selflessness, for someone he genuinely loved" (instead of the voice just disappearing, it left him because he defied its will. He knew or didn't know it was a bad choice to defy God- but he still did it. HE did it. It was his doing.)

It's about character agency!!! Im sure I bring it up a lot when I talk about characters, but stories are so much more meaningful to me when the characters aren't helpless- even if it makes them worst as people, ESPECIALLY SO, it's so much better when their tragedies are their own fault.

And you know what? I would've loved it so much even if there was no love. Even if it was a classic style bare bones Greek mythology story, where the character acts selfishly, being humanly flawed, and gets punished for it. (please don't pelt me with rocks.)

But it was even more. Toby did it again with the thing that breaks me. It was love. Whether you ship them or not (I know it could mean nothing™, idc) Spamton still cared about tenna. It's not even implied, it's outright said. He cared, that was his flaw! That was his mistake!

So often when we get half the story in these games, we take the information way too literally and assume the worse of the characters- (Kris opened a dark fountain? Oh they're possessed by a second entity.) (ralsei hides secrets from us? Oh he's secretly evil.)

Oh Spamton says he hates this "tenna" guy? That's the person who abandoned him and took everything from him. He's the villain of his story.

Nope. Tenna was someone Spamton cared about so much. So much so that he made an incredibly uncharacteristic decision, to risk it all, for him. For someone other than himself.

Spamton hates Tenna because Tenna is a representation of everything he lost, and why he lost it. Feelings are so much easier to hate and blame when they've got a name.

Before chapter 3 (from what we were told) his story lacked agency. Things happened around him, to him. Never BECAUSE of him.

The voice on the phone found HIM. it helped him get big. It decided to disappear, Then everything fell apart. Nothing was his fault and because of him. It was a good narrative and it made sense for him! But it didn't make me eat drywall. Y'know.

And when chapter 3 released... We learned that tenna managed to convince Spamton to sign the deal. He managed to convince him to tell him "his secret". Spamton was about to give him divine knowledge. He DECIDED TO. he MADE THE DECISION to sign the deal. Then the phone rang.

it waited until Spamton really did pick up the pen, and put it to the contract. Until the decision was clear and final. Then, it cut him off.

It was a fully conscious decision. It was his doing. It was his fault. He risked his position of power because he let a person that he cared about tempt him into it. He wouldnt do this for just anybody. He said screw it to everything he got from the voice on the phone, for this guy who made him feel just as special. For the first time in his life he did something for someone else. And that was when he lost it all.

THAT'S a story that makes me walk into the sea.

[1iliketrains1]

u know I really think a tumblr rule of thumb should be 'don't say anything in a reblog you wouldn't say directly to the OP of the post' bcos like. by and large whatever you say in your reblog you are, in fact, saying directly to the OP.

[1iliketrains1]

grog want wife

[1iliketrains1]

Dun - DUN!

[1iliketrains1]

do you think they know how much they contributed to online literacy? to the spirit of curiousity? to the idea of doing research yourself instead of always having it laid out in front of you?

[1iliketrains1]

Deities 🌠 prints: X // X // X

[1iliketrains1]

an ill omen

[1iliketrains1]

Z-A starters explained

[1iliketrains1]

….well, she’s got the spirit!

[1iliketrains1]

johto pokemon vs pokemon from new york

bonus: that phenomenon where japanese tourists visit paris and have a breakdown bc of how shit it is

[1iliketrains1]

ordering a pup cup for my chikorita in lumiose