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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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I want you to want me.

Superposition - Young the Giant

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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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Superposition - Young The Giant

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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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cough syrup | young the giant

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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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Νεχ ποσσυμ τεχυμ ωιωερε, νεχ σινε τε

We all recognize that phrase as Uta’s neck tattoo, which holds a beautiful meaning:

We know it describes the relationship humans and ghouls have. But, where did the phrase came from? Publius Ovidius Naso (Ovid for short) was a Roman poet who would often write about love and mythology, with a liking to putting parallels between his different works (can you think of someone who likes to do that too?).

One of his works is called Amores (Loves) and is separated in 3 books; the 39th poemout of them all (it’s on the 3rd book) is called “The Conflict of Emotions” and it goes like this:

“I struggle, and my fickle heart is pulled both ways, now by love, now hate, but I think love wins. I’ll hate if I can do: if not, I love unwillingly. No ox loves the yoke: yet he still suffers what he hates. I flee your wickedness – your beauty draws me back: I loathe your guilty ways – I love your body. So I can’t live with you nor without you, and don’t seem to know my own mind. I wish you were less beautiful or less wanton: such a lovely form doesn’t go with such bad ways. Actions worthy of hatred, a face that begs for love – ah me, she’s worth so much more than her vices! Oh, spare me, by the shared promises of our bed, by all those gods who so often let you cheat them, by your face that to me approaches the divine, by those eyes of yours that ravished mine! Be what you will, you will be mine for ever: you choose then, shall I love freely too or be constrained! Let me spread sail and enjoy the flowing breezes, or, if I may not, to want what I’m forced to love.”

When I read it I could only think that it kinda describes the relationship between Sasaki and Kaneki.

I struggle, and my fickle heart is pulled both ways, now by love, now hate, but I think love wins. I’ll hate if I can do: if not, I love unwillingly.

Sasaki doesn’t know if he should hate his previous self or if he should accept it; he often struggles with that issue (especially after the battle with Serpent). He tries to convince himself that it’s better if he doesn’t remember, but he is slowly trying to get used to the idea that he will have to remember sooner or later.

No ox loves the yoke: yet he still suffers what he hates. I flee your wickedness – your beauty draws me back: I loathe your guilty ways – I love your body.

Sasaki doesn’t like the situation he is in, being a half ghoul and not having any memories, but he can’t do anything about it. He tries to escape from the “Centipede” that haunts him in his dreams, but his lost memories pull him back to it.

So I can’t live with you nor without you, and don’t seem to know my own mind. I wish you were less beautiful or less wanton: such a lovely form doesn’t go with such bad ways.

Sasaki can’t accept that sadistic part of himself, but he needs to borrow his strength if he wants to be able to protect his loved ones. He doesn’t know anything from his past, why is his hair white or how did he end up being a half ghoul. He wishes his memories didn’t seem so important to him, and he also wishes his previous self was less dangerous, scary. His memories shouldn’t be something to be scared of, right?

Actions worthy of hatred, a face that begs for love – ah me, she’s worth so much more than her vices!

Sasaki sure had made some mistakes in his past and he had put his squad in danger due to his decisions, but recovering his memories often seemed so tempting, so important (if he did maybe he could remember that girl from :re).

Oh, spare me, by the shared promises of our bed, by all those gods who so often let you cheat them, by your face that to me approaches the divine, by those eyes of yours that ravished mine!

Both his previous self and Sasaki had promised themselves to protect their loved ones. Arima seemed to be okay with him even when he lost the control and even tried to help him with the Voice. When he used his previous self’s power he could defeat anyone he needed to. When he allowed him in he couldn’t take control of his body (whose body?), he would be eaten from the inside out by a power he couldn’t control.

Be what you will, you will be mine for ever: you choose then, shall I love freely too or be constrained! Let me spread sail and enjoy the flowing breezes, or, if I may not, to want what I’m forced to love.

Sasaki, Kaneki, both are tied together; they are the same after all, but they aren’t at the same time. Kaneki wants to regain his body, but he is willing to force Sasaki to give it to him; however, Sasaki wants to have a little more time having control of himself, and he forces Kaneki to remain in his mind for as long as he can. They both want to have full control of their body, but nor of them can, they are forced to exist together, because they wouldn’t stay alive if they can’t accept that the other is there. They can’t live with eachother, nor without eachother.

(Fun fact: the work Ovid is best known for is called Metamorphoses, which is all about transformation and change. Also, reminds to Kafka’s Metamorphosis).

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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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One is never afraid of the unknown; one is afraid of the known coming to an end.

Jiddu Krishnamurti (via purplebuddhaquotes)

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always-quiet-is-violent-blog · 7 years ago

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