an-ode-to-myself

[an-ode-to-myself]

an average f/f Literary Fiction novel with a central plotline about two women becoming romantically entangled is often hornier than an f/f Romance Novel with multiple explicit sex scenes because

in the f/f romance novels I've read at least the desire and the horniness is entirely contained within the sex scenes, outside of them the protagonist does not think lustfully about the love interest

but a Literary Novel will go on for several paragraphs about how the love interest's sweat slides down her wrist with a degree of desperation usually only seen in Tumblr textposts about [noun]girls

[an-ode-to-myself]

big fan of stories that, while undoubtedly being about the power of friendship, acknowledge that the power of incredible violence is just as important

the love was there. the love changed everything. the crowbar helped also

[an-ode-to-myself]

do publishers realize that advertising books using fanfic tropes spoils the experience of reading an original story. stop telling me it’s enemies to lovers and there was only one bed and unrequited love hurt comfort golden retriever black cat timeloop major character death. why do i give a fuck if i don’t know any of the characters and now plus i already know the entire plot of the story. that’s what ao3 is supposed to be for

[an-ode-to-myself]

The Infamous Pond, by Maximilian Liebenwein, 1907

[an-ode-to-myself]

I love 'hero living long enough to become the villain', but oughhhh, 'villain living long enough to become the hero' is life altering. Also not just ending in some goddamn sacrifice. They've gotta legit LIVE with those actions. And holy fuck, if they end up caring for someone they previously traumatized and now have to bear being the thing that haunts their nightmares for years? OH, THE ANGST, TAKE ME NOW!!!

[an-ode-to-myself]

I've already said that my number one piece of writing advice is to read.

But my number two piece of advice is this: be deliberate.

Honestly this would fix so many pieces of bad writing advice. Don't forbid people from doing something, tell them to be conscious and deliberate about it. This could help stop people from falling into common mistakes without limiting their creativity. Black and white imperatives may stop a few annoying beginner habits, but ultimately they will restrict artistic expression.

Instead of "don't use epithets": "Know the effect epithets have and be deliberate about using them." Because yes, beginners often misuse them, but they can be useful when a character's name isn't known or when you want to reduce them to a particular trait they have.

Instead of "don't use 'said'" or "just use 'said'": "Be deliberate about your use of dialogue tags." Because sometimes you'll want "said" which fades into the background nicely, but sometimes you will need a more descriptive alternative to convey what a character is doing.

Instead of "don't use passive voice": "Be deliberate about when you use passive voice." Because using it when it's not needed can detract from your writing, but sometimes it can be useful to change the emphasis of a sentence or to portray a particular state of mind.

Instead of blindly following or ignorantly neglecting the rules of writing, familiarize yourself with them and their consequences so you can choose when and if breaking them would serve what you're trying to get across.

Your writing is yours. Take control of it.

It probably sounds like I'm preaching to the choir here because most of my mutuals are already great writers. But I'm hoping this will make it to the right people.

[an-ode-to-myself]

Surely the tall, battle hardened, scarred, hairy, rude, vulgar, disheveled, but loyal and ferocious knight I have sworn in as my maiden daughter’s personal guard would not dare to look upon her fairness and her his roguish ways and dare to defy the marriage arrangement I have put in place for her.

[an-ode-to-myself]

The bulge is to distract you in combat dipshit

[an-ode-to-myself]

im so lucky I get to tell my characters' stories. sometimes maybe they are annoying forces in my head. but I'm so privileged to be able to tell their stories. do they know how much I love them?

[an-ode-to-myself]

let's roleplay a scenario where i suddenly collapse and you're the only witness but you're too anxious and fatigued by all the suffering that surrounds you to be inconvenienced by going to check on me so you just leave me there and hope someone else stops to help and are haunted by the guilty uncertainty of your inaction for decades to come

[an-ode-to-myself]

a featherful biped?

the default way for things to taste is good. we know this because "tasty" means something tastes good. conversely, from the words "smelly" and "noisy" we can conclude that the default way for things to smell and sound is bad. interestingly there are no corresponding adjectives for the senses of sight and touch. the inescapable conclusion is that the most ordinary object possible is invisible and intangible, produces a hideous cacophony, smells terrible, but tastes delicious. and yet this description matches no object or phenomenon known to science or human experience. so what the fuck

[an-ode-to-myself]

narrator who's terrible at social cues & describes every facial expression as "unreadable"

[an-ode-to-myself]

A desperate cleric slamming every healing spell so hard to bring someone back to life the ground is forced to grow plants and flowers around the body.

[an-ode-to-myself]

Since it's almost Midsummer...

p.s. I also have a book coming out: www.tomgauld.com/comic-books-v2

[an-ode-to-myself]

[an-ode-to-myself]

[an-ode-to-myself]

One fun lesson from the long history of speculation about the future is that we simply cannot imagine most of the ways in which the future will be different. 19th century authors in the midst of the early Industrial Revolution wrote about a 1990s where people still took carriages from place to place and the Ottoman Empire was a major world power. 1920s authors didn’t anticipate the invention of the computer, and 1950s authors didn’t anticipate its miniaturization, or the importance of networking. They also thought we’d have Moon bases by now. I don’t know what the blind spots of early 21st century futurism are, but I know they exist, and that any attempt to simply extrapolate current trends is going to fall flat on its face sooner or later. Sometimes it’s because technology improves in ways we don’t expect, and sometimes it’s because it doesn’t improve in ways we do expect, and sometimes it’s because history or social forces come in out of left field and shake everything up.