anchor-all

[anchor-all]

Hello. The following is a message from the Teufort Census Bureau.

How would you rate your current employment?

Thank you for your co-operation.

@tf2-data-collection-agency

Well, I mean, our company's kind of a freelancing ordeal, last I checked. So the employment terms might not be exactly the same....?

Our boss is brilliant though — he's done a real good job of boosting morale and taking care of the business parts and such and such.

Hope that's helpful!

[anchor-all]

Hello, Mr Wexler! It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm here to give you a message from someone who'd like to stay anonymous: "Sir, I'm dating your son (Ray), I hope that's alright with ya (PS: He's too nice to me)"

Well, I hope you have a good day, sir! Sorry for bothering!

--Kay, The A.N Office

@news-spreading-anon

Oh, is this the new boyfriend I've been hearing about? That's good to hear!

Tell them I send them my best wishes — Ray can be a bit of a handful sometimes. And to make sure he's treating them right! (Which, from the sound of it, seems to be the case anyway. But just in case.)

Thanks for letting me know!

[anchor-all]

apologies

___

[......]

"So, um. V. It has— it has been a while, now, since we talked, huh? I get you probably never want to hear my voice again, but—

Ah, I don't really even know myself. You've been doing okay, though, right?"

[......]

"Ooh— actually, how is Mitch? I've been wondering what he's been up to these days."

[......]

"Mhm. That's good to hear. I might have to talk to him about that, huh? Guess that's my Sunday morning sorted—"

[......]

"—I, ah. Why I called you? well, you see—"

[......]

"Why wouldn't I still have your number? No point in not having it, right?

…Now, um. I wanted to apologise."

[......]

"Yes, really!"

[......]

"Right—

I'm sorry. I am so goddamn sorry. If I knew you were gonna fuck off to wherever the hell I wouldn't have done it. I mean, there's all sorts of things I would've done different but I—

… I'm sorry for hurting you."

[......]

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. 

I'm also guessing it's not going to be the same as then."

[......]

"Thanks, mi amigo. Means a lot, really. Really really, if you will."

[......]

"Okay, 'night. And thank you."

[anchor-all]

Argh, why did I prompt you?????

"Peebis" isn't a good one either. That's not actually how it goes but no matter. Despite how funny it sounds it's still a cuss word and therefore reasonable grounds to.... ground you over.

Can— can you ground kittens...? Is that a thing?

*waddles into radio station and hops onto kierans desk. He waddles over to the mic and baps the on air button(whatever they press to go live)*

Meow

FUCK.

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

WHAT?????????

Who— Díos mio, who taught you that?????

That's a very bad word, Pepper! You can't just say it on live radio!

[anchor-all]

*He sighs and runs a hand down his face.*

Of course he did. Right, that's someone to talk to later...!

Did he teach you other bad words? You better not be saying those either.

*waddles into radio station and hops onto kierans desk. He waddles over to the mic and baps the on air button(whatever they press to go live)*

Meow

FUCK.

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

WHAT?????????

Who— Díos mio, who taught you that?????

That's a very bad word, Pepper! You can't just say it on live radio!

[anchor-all]

*waddles into radio station and hops onto kierans desk. He waddles over to the mic and baps the on air button(whatever they press to go live)*

Meow

FUCK.

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

WHAT?????????

Who— Díos mio, who taught you that?????

That's a very bad word, Pepper! You can't just say it on live radio!

[anchor-all]

hug?

Awww, 'course you can!

*He hugs Anon with a bit of a squeeze — not enough to restrict breath, of course, he's considerate!*

[anchor-all]

Meow meow meow meow meow

🐱🐱🐱

Me

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

Sure is! And you're just the best little kitty, aren't you...!

[anchor-all]

Wawisockekq

Dkwkcw

Whenever when ever amenfmeodoc bunched tough punitive swufsubbing s mdjakxddiverges to to a

Smfieosnwwi

Meow

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

Thanks, mate. Really insightful!

[anchor-all]

You're welcome, mate! Don't go too fast though, you could choke. And then the others'd kill me. Blegh. *He shudders.*

Welp, I have one guy here to defend me, huh? *He leans down and gives Peppercorn some pets.*

Meow

Woxdowodidiwcjtmtnroroe

Kerinan

Cosi/@(:9.’ekwoxmsoci@2@(9,\¥,*{$|AOFIEKSNS

Sowlwoxo

Hunger

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

D'you... want me to get you something? I can if you give me 5.

*He heads out of the booth, coming back in a short bit with a can of tuna. He opens it and puts it on the floor next to his chair.*

Go ahead, knock yourself out! Saves you biting my mic or something, so we both win.

[anchor-all]

Meow

Woxdowodidiwcjtmtnroroe

Kerinan

Cosi/@(:9.’ekwoxmsoci@2@(9,\¥,*{$|AOFIEKSNS

Sowlwoxo

Hunger

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

D'you... want me to get you something? I can if you give me 5.

*He heads out of the booth, coming back in a short bit with a can of tuna. He opens it and puts it on the floor next to his chair.*

Go ahead, knock yourself out! Saves you biting my mic or something, so we both win.

[anchor-all]

Wskwoaixs

Cat

Me

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

You sure are!! And you're great at boosting company morale, aren't you? Hell yes you are.

[anchor-all]

Whats peppercorns favourite crime?

cime biting

steel food

[anchor-all]

Kerian kwo be any TVs g has workflow and the do act can

Green hat egg gc Oo SC I’m I as I’m fa fa in oop rude yes Wh hi ya

Meow meow

- @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat

Incredible, Pepper!

I knew this was a good idea, hehe. You have fun now, right? We'll see if something interesting comes in.

[anchor-all]

Whats peppercorns opinion on his teammates?

big peeple. Give food amd pet. Like kiran akd ledsie

[anchor-all]

We've taught Peppercorn @peppercorn-the-therapy-cat how to type! (Or, I have, I guess? Ah, semantics.)

Feel free to ask him questions. :)

[anchor-all]

Hamburbur

Ah yes. Hamburbur.

I'm gonna be honest with you – I have no clue what this means. Doesn't mean it isn't insightful though!