androcur

[androcur]

Rice Krispies smartest decision is by far their Treat. Turning their cereal into a strange brick relies on the natural fact that all children are hopelessly dependent upon the ingot.

[androcur]

MOTHER series

Game Concept: JRPG set in the US but the developers know nothing about America

[androcur]

so I'm reading Gankra's "Learn Rust With Entirely Too Many Linked Lists" and the introduction feels like

STOP USING LINKED LISTS

DATA ELEMENTS WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE GIVEN POINTERS

YEARS OF COMPUTER SCIENCE yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for using anything other than Vec

Want to add and remove elements from the front and back just for a laugh? We have a tool for that: It's called "VecDeq"

"It might take a long time to look at any element but I'll make it up with all the merges, inserts, and splits I'll be doing" - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged

LOOK at what Functional Programmers have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all the LISP machines & tape readers we built for them (This is REAL Computer Science, done by REAL Computer Scientists)

???????????

"Hello I would like element.next.next.next.next.next.next.next.next please"

They have played us for absolute fools

[androcur]

can't make a amulet without breaking a few eggs

so I've been kissed stupid by a trans girl, what now?

seek the sacred amulet

[androcur]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

the walmart down the street proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

[androcur]

Here's lil Mr. Edgeworth trying his best to have a sippy of milk

schlurp schlurp

[androcur]

[androcur]

underfull hbox (badness 10000) upon u.........

tumblr should let me use LaTeX commands so i can inflict mathematics onto people directly like boo! euler-lagrange equation upon ye

[androcur]

wait. tag with your favourite video game piece of music. if i had to pick one, i'd probably say wanderlust from ffxv.

[androcur]

engineers hate him! local manager obliterates millions of engineering hours with this one weird trick (asking for more logos on the thing)

In other horrible tech news you may have already heard, the software that puts a logo on your linux or windows computer's screen during boot can be readily and essentially-irreversibly compromised to allow arbitrary code execution on your machine forever:

As its name suggests, LogoFAIL involves logos, specifically those of the hardware seller that are displayed on the device screen early in the boot process, while the UEFI is still running. Image parsers in UEFIs from all three major IBVs are riddled with roughly a dozen critical vulnerabilities that have gone unnoticed until now. By replacing the legitimate logo images with identical-looking ones that have been specially crafted to exploit these bugs, LogoFAIL makes it possible to execute malicious code at the most sensitive stage of the boot process, which is known as DXE, short for Driver Execution Environment.

There are several ways to exploit LogoFAIL. Remote attacks work by first exploiting an unpatched vulnerability in a browser, media player, or other app and using the administrative control gained to replace the legitimate logo image processed early in the boot process with an identical-looking one that exploits a parser flaw. The other way is to gain brief access to a vulnerable device while it’s unlocked and replace the legitimate image file with a malicious one. In either case, the malicious logo causes the UEFI to execute attacker-created code during the all-important DXE phase each time the device boots. By executing code in this early stage, when most of the system initialization is performed, an exploit hijacks all execution flow that follows, allowing it to bypass security defenses such as Secure Boot and hardware-based verified boot mechanisms such as Intel Boot Guard, AMD Hardware-Validated Boot, or ARM TrustZone-based Secure Boot. Depending on how the UEFI is configured, a simple copy/paste command, executed either by the malicious image or with physical access, is in many cases all that’s required to place the malicious image into what’s known as the ESP, short for EFI System Partition, a region of the hard drive that stores boot loaders, kernel images, and any device drivers, system utilities, or other data files needed before the main OS loads. There are major benefits to this approach. One is that no executable code ever touches the hard drive, a technique known as fileless malware that hampers detection by antivirus and other types of endpoint protection software. Another benefit: Once the image is in place, it ensures a device remains infected even when an operating system is reinstalled or the main hard drive is replaced. Since LogoFAIL targets UEFI specific code, this new threat is not confined to a single architecture, but it's instead another example of cross-silicon exploitation that affects both x86 and ARM devices.

Whoops, guess we should never have standardized the boot process.

[androcur]

[androcur]

When Henry Kissinger dies, we about to fucking party.

[androcur]

Call me LeBron Games

[androcur]

Today's Seal Is: Shrimple As That

[androcur]

Round eared sengi (Macroscelides proboscideus)

[androcur]

the lyricist of a generation

i must regretfully admit that this verse plays in my head every time i read Caroline Polachek's name