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“she’s got legs for days” pfffft not impressive. i;ve had mine for years
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you have to either lie or be honest and it depends but you can't know
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when you want to play online but they haven’t accepted your requests yet
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me in argyle st greggs for my weekly steak bake
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genuinely the funniest fucking thing ive seen all day
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saying "the age of 30 is in demand" near an elf and she looks at you with abject disgust
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He means a little squeeze bottle with brine shrimp inside but… bottle feeding the loblings…
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i know her heart was in the right place but my mom wrote this in the funniest way possible
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one time my mom and i were talking about autism and she said if i got it from anyone i got it from my dad, a man who has been buying and sorting pokemon cards for several months straight and likes to memorize license plates and then quiz my mom on them. and then she remembered that my father is not actually biologically related to me (#childofdivorce) and lost her shit laughing. i got that proxy autism
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"nobody is judging you" wrong, my mother is seemingly always judging every single stranger she sees
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Change.org - Petition To Hire 1,000,000 People To Put Their Fingers In The Shoot Hole Of Peoples’ Guns So They Can’t Shoot Them
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