andyheriaud

[andyheriaud]

Welcome to Two-tter: The Sequel To Twitter

Congratulations on being on the vanguard of social media.

Unlike other open source options that inexplicably named themselves after a long extinct pachyderm, Two-tter is designed to be a fully featured, easy to use replacement for our nearly departed bird site.

The team here at Two-tter has two primary goals for our first year of our multi-centennial social media supremacy:

Recreate Twitter, but like the good Twitter that we all more or less kind of sort of liked, but didn’t like, but dammit it was ours from the pre-Elon days.

Not get sued by the lenders that will inevitably own Twitter’s IP in like a month

But we’re not content to just make a new twitter and call it a day, a true sequel raises the stakes!

We have revolutionary ideas for social media, for example: what if our primary brand color wasn’t a shade of blue? Our spectrum engineers are hard at work and making exciting discoveries in the realm of primary, secondary, tertiary, and even quarternary colors.

We also have an incredible new feature that we’re proud to announce (not an edit button):

A premiere feature of Two-tter will be the Two-tter Main Character, every day our Two-tter community will elect a main character, whose thoughts and opinions will be endlessly opined, debated, picked apart, and dunked on for all of a day.

Two-tter Main Characters will be prominently featured in a slot pinned to the top of your feed so you can easily rejoin the conversation at any time to add more thoughts that absolutely add nothing.

When their time in the sun is up, Two-tter Main Characters get the coveted Main Character Badge, an exclusive and powerful status symbol that lets the world know that they were on the minds of millions of people for no more than 24 hours.

We know you have a lot of questions, and we want to have a lot of answers, but right now we at Two-tter only have three things: a dream, a domain name, and a founding team that’s dedicated to devoting like 5 hours a week to making this a reality (contingent on investment).

[andyheriaud]

[andyheriaud]

Happy Christmas Eve! #planeselfie

[andyheriaud]

According to Tumblr, my blog is now 3 years old.

So I am posting something to celebrate:

[andyheriaud]

He still doesn't want you! So why are you still messing with Will Graham, Hannibal? I'll tell you why, because you're a MEAN GIRL.

[andyheriaud]

Starbuck, Internet kitten. #catstagram #catsofinstagram

[andyheriaud]

Here's to the saddest aisle in Target. #divorce #nobodylovesyou

[andyheriaud]

It may be Kaitlin's drawing, but this is my design.

Andy had this idea and asked me to draw it, so I did! Will’s stag is much less intimidating drawn as the most beloved dog in Americana…  Click for the higher-res version! 

[andyheriaud]

If only this weren’t really stretching the truth. 

[andyheriaud]

I Got This Email From My Dad Today

Dear Andy,

Mom and I watched that kooky rom-com, Game of Thrones, last night.  I see a bright future for Lord Frey’s Wedding Planners Emporium.  I also hear the Lord Frey is being nominated for husband of the year.

Love,

Dad

[andyheriaud]

I reblog the post with minimal commentary to show I've read it but not that I want to expand upon it. This is my design.

My boyfriend has started narrating the things he does around our apartment, like, “I load the dishwasher with the bowls near the back” or “I clean the sink after the tub to avoid dirtying it again,” and the pausing dramatically and whispering… ”This is my design.” 

[andyheriaud]

Looks like my DVR is doing double time tonight.

[andyheriaud]

SOME THINGS LAST A LONG TIME • an Eleventh Doctor mix

Kelly requested I make a mix for Eleven, so I happily obliged. There’s an intended order to the songs, so listen to them in the sequence! 

01: HURRICANE • MS MR Nights like this I become afraid of the darkness in my heart

02: KASHMIR • Led Zeppelin I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been

03: AU REVOIR • OneRepublic We can take apart this life we’re building and pack it up inside a box

04: SWEET CHILD O’ MINE • Taken by Trees I’d hate to look into those eyes and see an ounce of pain

05: INVINCIBLE • Muse You will be alright ‘cause there’s no one like you in the universe

06: SOME THINGS LAST A LONG TIME • The Twilight Sad Your picture is still on my wall, the colors are bright as ever, the things we did I can’t forget

07: PLEASE JUST TAKE THESE PHOTOS FROM MY HANDS • Snow Patrol Photographs that tell the wanderlust of years smashed onto years

08: YOU REMAIN • Willie Nelson What do you do with a memory that sits around and stares at me?

09: DOUBTING THOMAS • Nickel Creek Can I be led down a trail dropping bread crumbs to prove I’m not ready to die?

10: THE DIVIDE • Grace Potter & The Nocturnals No I’m not running, I’m just stealing time

11: LEAVE MY BODY • Florence + The Machine I don’t want your future, I don’t need your past; one bright moment is all I ask

12: AFTER THE STORM • Mumford & Sons Because death is just so full and man so small, well I’m scared of what’s behind and what’s before

13: ALIVE • Meatloaf Let the end of the world come tumbling down, I’ll be the last man standing on the ground

LISTEN HERE

[andyheriaud]

Little did the marketing department at Pepsi know that their new nationwide slogan was one well placed comma away from being a threat.

[andyheriaud]

This flower shop is heaven for bees. #nature #flower #bees (at Sunset Nursery)

[andyheriaud]

It's a sunny day in #virginia. #rural #charlottesville

[andyheriaud]

This is really important.

holy shit korea i love you a lot 

all you need to know is that it’s an inside look on the show hannibal thanks to a korean narrator who really is uncontrollably excited and gives praises to Mads Mikkelsen and Hugh Dancy, respectively

finished with sparkly things and such

edit: translation here!