arachnerd-8-legs

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What my bisexual boyfriend will be wearing when he walks down the aisle

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i think we shouod terraform earth to make it completely flat because itd be fun

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Tumblr is unique bc like. It's collaborative shitposting and you can't opt in or out. You can just say something about your day then an evil wizard shows up to turn your post into something humorous

Every other site is just one and done, but here a post is a welcome mat to be funnier than you

[arachnerd-8-legs]

profilipilt kohuke... no description...

lõpuks ometi ka eesti oma pornobott!

🎀tere 🥂22 👉Tallinn 🥛 i'm all creamy 4 u

[arachnerd-8-legs]

[arachnerd-8-legs]

going on pinterest and commenting “hmm… i find this really.. pinteresting…!” on every single post i see

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next dynamic were sexualizing is that of a bull and a toreador

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are we not feeling very pious today, brother lionel

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[arachnerd-8-legs]

so many creatures putting SO much effort into putting ‘special’ fluids that TOTALLY aren’t water through every organ possible to clean them so they can use them again 2 seconds later. like why not simply sit on a damp substrate and pull water through your body by evaporating the extra out pores in your leaves lmaoooo

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I AM SO SERIOUS WHEN I SAY THAT I WILL UNFOLLOW THE FUCK OUT OF YOU IF I SEE YOU REBLOGGING THAT PHOTO-SET OF THE COCKATOO COVERED IN CHOCOLATE

That is not funny

That is not cute

It is animal abuse

BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT CHOCOLATE

BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE COATED IN CHOCOLATE

Why the fuck do you think birds who get coated in oil die? It’s for the same goddamn reason.

You idiots can have all the chuckles you want over the fact that that poor animal is “living the dream” but I hope you also know that it probably died from that.

And if you still find it funny then I genuinely do not want to associate you and can only wish upon you the most painful and awful death imaginable. 

[arachnerd-8-legs]

The only adhd tips that work:

1. Never tell anyone what you're planning to do until you do it (you will get a premature dopamine hit and sense of accomplishment from telling them and lose motivation to actually do it)

2. Never sit down (never sit down)

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On the topic of English people being shitheads towards Welsh people - This fucking dude today on AITA

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[arachnerd-8-legs]

this is by far the funniest jigsaw_quotes post i genuinely cannot stop thinking about the sight of like, jigsaw opening his wallet in the checkout line at the Death Trap Lowe’s and he has like two pennies and a dime in there. and he just sighs

[arachnerd-8-legs]

people love to find progressive ways to say we should all be arranged into separate groups and try our hardest to not relate to one another