aussie-thoughts

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I have to get a 197/200 to pass my A&P class with a B, and im so close to getting a psych B. Wish me luck

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I am fucked, i got a 50 on the last lecture test. I’m Hobbs have to retake this class.

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I fucking hate this

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I’m about a week out from the end of the term and I am currently set to get c’s in all three of my classes. Which will require me to retake two of them..

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Here’s a thought outside of the realm of thoughts that I usually post on here. Why am I unlovable? I don’t know if it’s just because it’s almost 2 in the morning or after getting it’s just going horrible for me, but I went through the whole cereal hook up thing I tried dating I fucked that up but it already wasn’t working before I fucked it up. How am I supposed to ever be in a ltr relationship if I can’t find one now. The longest relationship I’ve been in was six months, and even then it didn’t really feel real to move on from that point what is a relationship? what defines it? Me and my ex we used to go on dates every week and talk pretty much every day, but I didn’t find it annoying like I had in the past, or even now, and then it slowly turned into us watching TV every week and got to the point where we didn’t see each other for weeks at a time because of our schedules and that’s when he ended things with me. After I had already cheated on him, I don’t have any healthy relationship examples that I could lean on and nowadays it seems like more relationships end up in nothing than a lasting marriage. And i want something. I thought I had some thing with the barista, but I pushed it too fast as it was a rebound and he was ultimately uninterested which hurts because I have been genuinely thinking about him for a while now. It doesn’t help that my chances of getting in a relationship are significantly slim down by the fact that I’m gay or that I literally have no interactions in my daily life with queer men, my age, nor do I ever run into queer men in my non-daily life in any sort of meaningful way that could lead to a relationship, or even just a friendship. I have what I would consider good friends from my experiences, but I have also never felt so lonely in my life.

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Im also scared about this test

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I did research on vermont and it looks amazing but i dont want to fall in love because i want to go to australia.

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I am conflicted, and i don’t know where i want to live after i graduate

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I am now a day past the deadline that I set for myself for these assignments, and I think I’m gonna finish them all by Wednesday. Today I have the final lecture test and on Wednesday I have the final lab test. I am not excited for the final. I should have the last of the discussion questions completed today though so that is good.

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I have actually made some headway into my homework and completed the three most recent lecture/discussion question forums. I’m proud of myself.

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I also need to complete my work

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My test got cancelled and work was delayed until 11:30. I’m gonna make chicken pho today.

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Im studying in the library and completing basic work for A&P

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I blew off a study group lol

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I had my college meeting today. It went well. I am also in contact with my teachers and working towards getting a b in the two classes I’m struggling in.

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I picked up my violin for the first time in months

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I kinda want to knit a gustav klimp irregular blanket for my mother