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"I love you but you're doing wrong in a way I cannot condone" and "I hate you but you're being wronged in a way I cannot stomach" are top tier and I need more of them.

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Every time I read one of those age gap posts the age where you're still helpless and being taken advantage of gets higher and higher, like 26 years old is too young to interact with older people what the fuck? I have lots of friends who were/are well into doing a PhD at this point. My dad had me at 26 years old. You're a whole grown ass person participating in society, you can vote and join politics, you can work, you can live in your own.

This smolbeanification has to stop, it's frankly embarrassing.

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Ever just think about a certain period of your life and end up saying "what the fuck was that?"

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candy before beer youre in the clear. beer before candy hurricane sandy

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if we draw lines that link every single berlin in the US to every single other berlin in the US we will find the true location of Berlin the Berlin superposition as it were

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make a terrible comic day.... i missed it last year but not now

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whichever ad exec at Geico came up with the phrasing "up to 15% or more" needs some kind of award for concocting one of the most meaningless strings of words in the English language. all it guarantees is that the number is either lower or higher than 15%, inclusive. up to 15%... or more. a bladeless knife with no handle.

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hey bro can we like adopt paralleling themes and symbolize opposites but in a two sides of the same coin kind of way? it doesn’t have to be weird. wait what do you mean thats gay

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living by my awesome sword #mysword

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i think that other people have access to an Energy source that i don’t but that’s okay i’m happy for them i do wish that was me though

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I love u narrative songs 💖💖💖

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Strawberry Shortcake in Big Apple City but make it Harajuku 🎀🍓🎀

Prints of this drawing are available on my Etsy shop, kaitlynillustrations.etsy.com ♥️

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affirmations

i am a complex organism brutally engineered by uncaring forces of nature

i am a product of billions of years and trillions of deaths

i am building a machine greater than myself

i am able to make phone calls and appointments

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Sometimes when doing writing research you find a little factoid that isn’t right for tormenting YOUR blorbos, but it is PERFECT for tormenting a friend’s blorbos so you just drop the fact on their doorstep like a demented little present.

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violence and death and dying and blood and guts and gore and violence and viscera and fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

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the fight or flight that is sparked from hearing my morning alarm go off should be studied . if i hear it anytime after 5am then my heartrate spikes considerably. they need to fix that