belladonha

[belladonha]

You know, I don't by that thing...I think you're interested in me, you just don't wanna open to it.

Or maybe I'm just being delusional

[belladonha]

I can't tell if I'm making myself believe in the good things or if I'm denying the good ones cause I'm afraid it might be true.

[belladonha]

You were right.

The more I try to hold it in,

the more it tries to escape from me.

[belladonha]

Okay, I'll let me be honest

I like him..but not like like?

I like when he laughs

And he talks random things

I like when he tries to put this mascara

But he's actually really clowny

And I like how he dress

I also like his eyes, the look he has

I wanna be around, but not in this obsessive way

[belladonha]

“I have never had the joy of being a child. The terrible torments which I suffered disturbed the tranquility there must be in being a child, having things in one’s own hands, being occupied, etc., delighting one’s father; for my inner unrest meant that I was always, always, outside myself.”

— Søren Kierkegaard, Journals and Papers

[belladonha]

Le quiero comer la caraaaaaa

[belladonha]

It feels like being drunk without a drop of alcohol...

[belladonha]

Fyodor Dostoevsky, from a letter featured in "Letters of Fyodor Michailovitch Dostoevsky to his Family & Friends,"

[belladonha]

Marcel Proust, from a letter featured in The Selected Letters of Marcel Proust

[belladonha]

— Why do I always have to be the one raising their voice?

— You don't have to.

— But I do. I do, because if I don't, someone else will have to carry that weight.

— There's nothing wrong with that.

— I guess not… but it feels wrong.

— Why?

— I don't know. Maybe it's this need I have to protect others from their own fears… because no one ever protected me from mine.

— …

— Maybe, deep inside my narcissism, I see people as useless, incapable beings without hope.

And there comes the irony in all of it…

Escritos

[belladonha]

Y no,

No quiero eso

Rechazo el hedor

Y rechazo tus besos.

O eso creía, pero ahora dudo

Volvi a anhelar labios

De quien nunca estuvo.

Pero no, yo no haría eso

No cederia al viejo reflejo

No tomaria jamás el derecho

De apuñalarme directo al pecho.

Escritos

[belladonha]

Y hueles

Hueles a desvelos, a complicidad

A atracción devenida indiferencia

A canciones que revelan angustia

Y a miradas que inculpan avaricia.

Escritos

[belladonha]

— sylvia plath (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[belladonha]

[belladonha]

Louise Glück, from a poem titled "Blue Rotunda," featured in Averno: Poems, originally published in 2006

[belladonha]

Gabriela Mistral, from a poem titled "The Teacher's Prayer," featured in The Selected Poems of Gabriela Mistral

[belladonha]

I wanna be prioritised and loved and cared.

I love myself, i really do

But i want someone else to love me too