bhushangandhi-blog

[bhushangandhi-blog]

·     10/10/18

Realisation: I always portray myself as the victim in my songs. I don’t like that.

·     12/10/18

After watching lots of crime and murder documentaries: How would my music change if my “character” became the perpetrator?

·     20/10/18

An idea after reading The Psychopath Test [Ronson, J. 2011]: Embodying a character. A perpetrator, not a victim. Cutting up parts of sound in crime and murder documentaries, horror films, interviews with murderers, news reports. Joining these audio samples together to create disjointed music or to use as inspiration for writing.

·     24/10/18

After my tutorial with teacher:

Explore folk. Why does traditional folk often tell stories of murder, revenge and death? Look at examples where the story is told from the murderer’s point of view.

“I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die...” - Folsom Prison Blues by Johnny Cash [Cash, J. 1957]

·     19/11/18

Realisation:

Reminding myself that this project is supposed to help me distance my voice from my music. But portraying myself as a murderer feels too separate to me, too far from me. I need a character I have some connection to.

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We cannot take it with us, it will all be left behind when God wants us to move on.

Bhushan Gandhi (2.01.19)

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Project: Bhushan’s Story

My grandfather Bhushan Kumar Gandhi, born February 28th 1938 in Jagraon, a town in the Indian state of Punjab. Brought up in Lyallpur, which is now Pakistan. Forced to flee his home on August 7th 1947 during the partition; he was only 9 years old. I want to tell his story.

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Why?

I want to use music as a medium to understand more about my Indian heritage and connect with my family history. I want to explore ways of writing through persona and telling stories through song. And I want to accomplish my main realisation which is distancing my voice from my music.

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Idea 1 - Performative Identity

I first planned on writing an EP, each song being a story from Bhushan’s perspective. I did some reading on performative identity.

Many books on this subject refer to this concept of two possible starting points: internal or external, and two possible pathways: “inside out” or “outside in”. Rick Kemp argues in his book “Embodied Acting” that this can reflect ideas of sameness and difference between self and character. [Kemp, R. 2012. p93] This made me think of the approach I was going to take when attempting to embody Bhushan as a character in my songs. “Inside out” – meaning finding any similarities I share with him and then interpreting his stories into music; “outside in” – meaning studying Bhushan and his stories and putting it into song and then finding a way to relate it to myself in performance. Orson Scott Card supports this idea of similarity and difference in his book “Characters and Viewpoint” where he says ‘the mostimportant ingredient in how much we like a stranger when we first encounter him is how much he seems to be like us…While we tend to like characters that are like us, we also tend to be a little bored with them. It’s strangeness, not familiarity, that excites our curiosity.’ [Card, O. 1988. pp98-101]

I found with this project a strong balance of similarity and dissimilarity between us; the similarity is that my character is actually an existing person who is related to myself and who I am, in fact, very close to. Other family members often say we share many characteristics in our personality, such as family-orientated, dreamers, always “up in the clouds”, very passive, etc. The strangeness lies in the fact that my Grandad and I have lived very different lives in terms of era/time/age, culture, location, personal interests, jobs, etc. Another big difference is gender. Percy Fitzgerald believed ‘…the intensely feminine air which pervades everything she does – seeming to arise from an ever present, and ever active feeling of sex – you never for an instant lose sight of the woman in the character…’ [Fitzgerald, P. 1892. p15] This made me question whether it is even possible for me, as a woman, to portray myself as a male character. And also, why do people believe this cannot be achieved? Card defines a character story as ‘…a person trying to change his role in life. It begins at the point when the main character finds his present situation intolerable and sets out to change…’ [Card, O. 1988. p68] How much input would I allow myself to have in the story-telling? Would I show a process or a change in Bhushan even if the stories he has told me are mainly based on situations and events?

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Carrying on with Idea 1... Bjork

I know I needed to find other artists who explore their identity and personas on stage to help me answer my questions. The first person I immediately thought of was Bjork. Artistically, Bjork loves experimenting with her identity in terms of her visuals, but then also in terms of what she is known for. She can be considered to be a singer, a writer, a film composer, an actress, a pop star. The way she writes interests me as well because she is very much a story teller; she creates new worlds that I have never experienced with another artist before.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Z5aPaDwAkU

“His wicked sense of humour Suggest exciting sex His fingers, they focus on her, Touches, he’s Venus as a boy” [Bjork. Venus as a Boy.1993]

Venus as a Boy is a song on Bjork’s “Debut” album (1993). In the lyrics above she is describing a situation where she is being seduced by a boy but using Venus, goddess of love and temptation, to characterise him which to me is a beautiful analogy.

In Nicola Dibben’s book on Bjork, there is a quote said by Bjork herself which is: “…so I just go for a walk in nature for a while and out comes a song that I don’t understand. And I’ll sing it in one take and not really analyse it, and then afterwards I can spend five billion hours on the arrangement…” [Dibben, N. 2009. p53] Bjork uses her close relationship and love for nature to stimulate most of her narratives in which she says she doesn’t understand herself meaning nature acts as her persona/character. She is in complete control of the musical arrangement however. This is exactly how I would like to approach my project. Letting my Grandad be in control of the narratives and the story. And I can control the arrangement – this will be discussed later in the blog.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sqbv7cCM5AI

“Bird species never seen or heard before The first flute carved from the first fauna” [Bjork. Utopia.2017]

Bjork explains in an interview with NY Times that the song “Utopia” was inspired by Peach Blossom Spring: a Chinese tale of an isolated community where people live in harmony with nature.Not only does she experiment with characters, but also the landscapes and worlds that her songs take place. She completely embodies this imagined character shown in the cover of the album.

[Bjork. Utopia.2017]

Bjork reminds me of a drag queen/king in terms of her extravagant visuals and need to embody a character, also how she experiments with her gender identity through visuals and narrative metaphors. This is when I briefly considered drag as an option to explore my identity.

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Idea 2 - Drag

So, I thought what if I created a drag king character to perform as, touching on Bhushan’s experiences as well as experimenting with my own voice and identity.

Caitlin Greaf writes in her online article “Drag Queens and Gender Identity”: ‘Drag queens allow a break in the heteronormative gender guideline while also reinforcing the social image of what it means to look like a woman.’ [Greaf, C. 2015] They become a persona in which they have created themselves, but also have based it on the desired image of a woman; they are merging their self and character into one. However, there is a lot of criticism with drag queens in particular. Judith Butler indicates that although the drag community do manipulate conceptions of gender, ‘…they in turn also recycle the heteronormative ideals of feminine gender performances. Thus, through their feminine performance, they are justifying the pre-existing social ideas that femininity means to have a select type of stylized hair, make up, clothing, and body language.’ [Butler, J. 1988. pp519–531] It has always frustrated me knowing drag queens are more popular than drag kings; it is sad to think that even in the drag and LGBTQ+ communities where they promote love and acceptance, women are still fighting to be heard. Some drag queens and kings’ success are affected by if they “pass” which, for example refers, to how much a drag king looks and acts like a male. Robin Maltz discusses this in her book “Real Butch” and says that ‘To pass effectively, a subject is (mis)read as “real”.’ [Maltz, R. 1998. p286] In order for me to “pass” as Bhushan I would have to completely change the tone and timbre of my voice, which is of course impossible. So, would this mean that I would be perceived as less “real” or less successful?

I realised that this would be inappropriate for my project because it would be difficult to express myself as a drag king without being insensitive to Bhushan and his stories as they are tragic experiences that he struggled with. Also, I do not want to take the focus off Bhushan as the main character. Reminding myself that all I want to do is share his story.

This is when I realised I should look at traditional folklore and oral tradition and using this to tell my Grandad’s stories through the voices of his family.

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Final Idea - Folk Song and Oral Tradition

I realised what I really wanted was to allow myself and others, especially my own family, to connect with our history through song. I would like to write a song telling the story of Bhushan’s experience during the partition and sing it a few times to a family member, most probably my mum and my sister. Then I would record them individually singing it back to me, adapting it however they would like, as long as it is from the perspective of Bhushan. This way I will have three or four recordings of the same story/song interpreted differently by each family member. In terms of how this would be presented, I am unsure as to what is most appropriate at this point. I have a general idea where I could create a video EP, the audio being each song and the visuals being Bhushan miming along to the songs. This way it shows his story being passed down the family and shared through us.

Kip Lornell in his book “Introducing American Folk Music” states that there are six general characteristics of folk music. There were three that I thought were the most important to me which are:

1.    ‘Folk songs are usually disseminated by word of mouth, aurally, or through informal apprenticeships within a community.’

2.    ‘Folk music often retains well-established associations with functional activities within the community – work, religious ceremonies, or dance.’

3.     ‘Short forms and predictable patterns are fundamental to folk music.’

[Lornell, K. 1993. pp10-11]

The first characteristic, oral tradition, would be practiced through me writing a song based on my Grandad’s story and sharing it with my family through a listening-performance interaction. The second characteristic involves an association with work, religious ceremony or dance which I could incorporate by studying the religious and dance aspects and intentions of classical Indian and Sufi music which will be discussed later in this blog. And the last characteristic refers to the specific structure of the song, again I will be talking about the use of strophic structure later on in this blog.

Steve Roud perfectly defines folk in his book “Folk Song in England” by saying that ‘it is not the origin of a song which makes it “folk”, but what the “folk” do with it.’ [Roud, S. 2017. p23] This is a definition by context, which is the most important attribute of folk, not the sound but the story it is telling. This concept appealed to me the most because it meant that I could just focus on the lyrics and let the sound take form later on in the process. Roud explains later on in this book how songs were shared. English traditional singing was predominantly solo and unaccompanied and did not involve the use of written music. ‘Even within the confines of the more conventional two-, three- and four-beat metres, it is clear from the recordings we have that there is a feeling of elasticity and flexibility in singers’ performances through subtle rhythmic variation within a fairly regular beat.’ [Roud, S. 2017. P649] I am intrigued to see how my family members will adapt the melody, rhythm and lyrics and to see if that reflects themselves as well as their relationship to Bhushan. Many people at this time lacked the formal education to read and write so ballad stories grew to be very popular. Psalm singing was one of the only exceptions which relied on written texts as explained by Lornell: ‘Psalm singing grew out of the practice of chanting psalms from the Bible, and it was eventually replaced by composed hymns. The chanting tradition came over with the first English settlers…’ [Lornell, K. 1993. p85] So there is potentially an option to share the written lyrics with my family members, especially if I am exploring the religious and spiritual use of Sufi music.

I plan on reading more about the oral tradition and specific techniques on how they would share and learn their folk songs.

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History of Lyallpur and The Partition

Bhushan currently lives in Canada with my grandmother so all forms of communication were by email or over the phone. They did visit us for a week where I managed to record a chat I had with Bhushan talking about his life in India as a child. The story that resonated with me the most though was him fleeing his home with his family and his experience of the partition. Before I did any song writing I researched more about his upbringing and the partition itself.

[Ghanta Gar. 1903]

I found other people’s memories of Lyallpur online and used this to try and imagine what the town was like. Many articles referred to the Ghanta Gar as the focal point of the town which is the clock tower (image above). Jatinder Sethi reminisces over his hometown, born in Lyallpur in 1930, he emphasises how close the community was by saying: ‘Being a small town, the owners knew most of the regular children and their parents. More like family friends. Miss that personal touch now!’ [Sethi, J. 2012]

What do you miss most about India?

“My family” – Bhushan Gandhi (16.02.19)

Sethi also mentions annual festivals taking place many times a year and this being a big part of the community. One in particular was called “The Mandi Fair” – ‘…farmers bringing cows, buffaloes, calves, wheat, etc. for sale…’ [Sethi, J. 2012] After reading this, I remember Bhushan discussing his farming life as his favourite part of India. It is odd to think that there is a possibility that Bhushan and Jatinder Sethi crossed paths during these festivals. “The Faisalabad Chamber of Commerce and Industry” website talks about the physical history of Lyallpur, as this town is now known as Faisalabad (part of Pakistan) since the partition. ‘The main roads in and out of the city were kept 1-acre wide; since the independence of Pakistan a lot of roads have been taken over by land mafia… the consequence of changing former industrial area into urban areas has been a lack of proper drinkable water… the city of Lyallpur enjoyed considerable development, and became a major commercial and industrial centre. The population grew quickly past one million.’ [The Faisalabad Chamber of Commerce and Industry. 2014] It is important to note how significant the change was for Bhushan’s past home town as this reflects how much he was leaving behind and this idea of newness – his home, his memories, his family, his life.

“Long years ago, we made a tryst with destiny, and now the time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure, but very substantially. At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will wake to life and freedom.” - Jawaharlal Nehru, the country’s first prime minister(15thAugust 1947) [Metcalf, B. and Metcalf, T. 2006. p219]

Bhushan tells me how he remembers hearing this on the radio and his family immediately getting really upset because they knew what was to come. (16.02.19) Luckily, the experience Bhushan had was not as violent as many others I have read about. Bhushan and his family managed to travel to the border with their neighbours and safely made it to his birth town, Jagraon. Although, during the journey he says how he is still haunted by the sight of many dead bodies on the ground. (2.01.19) Barbara D. Metcalf and Thomas R. Metcalf describe the riots as ‘…the greatest holocaust of all – that in the Punjab.’ [Metcalf, B. and Metcalf, T. 2006. p218] Bimla Goulatia, who was then five years old, recalls her horrific experience of being trapped in a bank during the riots, even saying that the elders had made a pact that they would kill the women and children themselves if there was an attack. ‘We children had decided that instead of using boiling hot water to make tea, we would throw the hot water on the attackers.’ [Goulatia, B. 2012] When Bimla did arrive at a camp she recounts her unforgettable memories: ‘Everybody looked dirty and hungry, running here and there in search of food, shelter or loved ones. We slept on the floor.’ [Goulatia, B. 2012] The only similarities that lie in everyone’s retelling is how divided the country now felt. Families only trusted and felt safe within their own communities ‘…and this in turn helped consolidate loyalties towards the state, whether India or Pakistan, in which one might find a secure haven.’ [Metcalf, B. and Metcalf T. 2006. pp221-222] The sad truth is that estimates range from one hundred thousand to one million people who lost their lives during this time. Overall, partition uprooted some 12.5 million of undivided India’s people. [Metcalf, B. and Metcalf, T. 2006. pp217-222]

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Diasporic Identity

Even after talking to my Grandad through email, phone and face-to-face, and even after reading many books about the partition, I can never claim to fully understand this experience because I was not there. Rick Kemp defines the difference between concrete and intellectual memories: ‘“Concrete” memories would be felt in the body in the same way as the original emotion, while an “abstract” recollection would be “intellectual.”’ [Kemp, R. 2012. p157] Does it matter that I will never have a concrete memory of this story? I am abstractly experiencing Bhushan’s feelings and emotions through his words.

‘What haunts are not the dead, but the gaps left within us by the secrets of others… the burial of an unspeakable fact… like a ventriloquist, like a stranger within.’ - Nicolas Abraham and Maria Torok, The Shell and the Kernel [Cho, G. 2008. p1]

I have always had a strong sense of appreciation for my family because I am aware of everything my grandparents have been through to be together and build up this family. It has only been since talking to my Grandad in depth about his past how I have realised just how vast his struggle has been. I have always hated change. I like to be in a stable environment with familiar faces I can trust. I honestly believe this mentality was embedded in me through my mother, who of course learnt this from her father, Bhushan. My mother and sister are very strong and have always stood up for themselves when they feel like they are being neglected. However, myself and Bhushan have similar reactions to dealing with life problems – we let it happen, we let the bad pass and hope for good.

Grace M. Cho searches for her own history and meaning in her book: “Haunting the Korean Diaspora” and she explains her feeling of ‘…living within a family full of ghosts… There was this place that they knew about. Inside is the pain of speech the pain to say. I had never been there… yet I had a memory for it… I could remember a time of great sadness before I was born. We had been moved. Uprooted.’ [Cho, G. 2008. p190] I plan on reading more about Cho’s experience of reconnecting with her family history and trauma and other people’s knowledge of diaspora.

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(Click on “Draft Song” title to hear recording)

Sitting at the table, blowing out my candles

Dad bursts through the door, I’d never seen him scared before

He said happy birthday son but I’ve got some bad news

This is no longer our home, I’d never seen him this scared before

He takes the chair next to mine as he tries to explain

To a 9 year old boy that things are gonna change

And mother oh so silent stands up to say

This will always be our home, I’d never seen her this scared before

Time had passed along, convinced it was a dream

I was convinced it was a dream

But one night my father took me out of bed, out of my sleep

At the stroke of midnight, we were forced to leave

30 long miles walk to the border

With just the clothes on our backs and a bottle of water

My little sister on my dad’s shoulder

His hands on her eyes as we step over

The bodies

Oh, the bodies

The bodies

Oh, the bodies

Time had passed along

Oh, I prayed it was a dream

Oh, I hoped it was a dream

oh, I pray to god every day every night

Oh, I ask him to say it was all a dream

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Compositional Process (1)

First, I listened to the chat I had with Bhushan discussing this story and I read over his emails, writing notes and specific phrases he said which resonated with me. I used a lot of his own words to write the lyrics for this story. I want it to sound and feel like this story is coming completely from him, but just through the mouths of his children and grandchildren. At the moment, I am worried about how literal the lyrics are, leaving no space for interpretation. This is something I will work on by showing to peers and getting their opinion on what parts of the song resonated with them most.

[Lomax, J. 1934. pp29-30]

In terms of the structure, I was clearly influenced by folk’s traditional use of strophic structure and repetition. I read “American Ballads and Folk Songs” by John A. Lomax throughout my process of writing; here is one that directly inspired me (as shown in picture above).

This is a section of a folk song called “Ten Thousand Miles from Home” so immediately it caught my attention as it had a similar narrative to Bhushan’s story. “Ten thousand miles away from home / My heart was filled with pain” [Lomax, J. 1934. p29] – this is repeated many times throughout the song so I used a similar tactic in which the lyrics I use in the refrain is a phrase that Bhushan said often when telling his story: “Time had passed along / I was convinced it was a dream.” Apart from the refrain in “Ten Thousand Miles Away from Home”, there is not much expression of his emotion – it is more descriptive than anything else e.g.: “I laid me down to take a nap… Then I walked up to a kind miss and asked for a bite to eat… She took me in her kitchen and she treated me nice and kind…” [Lomax, J. 1934. p30] The only thing he speaks fondly of is this woman he meets and falls in love with – she cares for him despite him being a homeless man. I took a similar approach in which the verses are just describing the scene and telling the story; I only speak fondly of his home: “This will always be our home.” Also, the only emotions that are expressed in my song are that of his parents: “I’d never seen him/her this scared before.” – leaves you questioning the exact emotions he felt. In terms of the rhyming scheme, the folk song above seems to be ABCB which is how I initially started writing my song in the first verse, although I am aware it is just a repetition for the line B: “candles / before / news / before”. I liked the idea of using imperfect rhyme, so if we look at the second verse the last words are: “explain / change / say” – The stressed vowel sound of “ay/ai” are identical and is what makes it a half-rhyme. In “Ten Thousand Miles Away from Home”, he leaves the woman he loves without saying goodbye and I saw this as a symbolism of Bhushan leaving his home halfway through his sleep.

I initially wrote the melody accompanied with piano, but now it feels more appropriate to have it acapella as this is how I would intend sharing it with my mum and sister to learn and adapt themselves. And when I decide to record their versions, they will be acapella also, apart from some vocal harmonies underneath to act as a foundation for the song. After speaking to Bhushan about his own musical preferences, I realised I want to somehow incorporate elements of classical Indian music and Pakistani Sufi music which is what he grew up listening to.

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Compositional Process (2)

Indian classical music was an oral tradition. It was never written down and recorded. Sunil Bose in his book “Indian Classical Music: Essence and Emotions” explains its close association with rituals and the ‘…chant-like intonation and movement of the songs in the spirit of magical rites.’ [Bose, S. 1990. p13] I always knew Indian music had a strong relationship with religion and their beliefs so I now have to find ways to incorporate this aspect into my song. Bose then says, ‘on the other hand, the prominent features of ancient folk music were the verbal element, the ordinary and simple human feelings express through themes pertaining to occupations, festivals and other aspects of social life.’ [Bose, S. 1990. p13] So I also have to consider more emotion into my song. People who were brought up in or live in India mostly believe that the closest way to God is through music because it was the deities who created their music. Mythology tells us Lord Shiva gave them five raagas, the sixth came from his consort: Parvati. Lord Shiva destroyed evil by performing with a damaru in his hand, a percussive instrument, and this created rhythm. Narada Rishi, a Hindu sage who was known as a travelling musician and storyteller, taught music to man by singing and playing the veena (a stringed instrument). [Bose, S. 1990. p19] In a way I would like to take a similar role to Narada Rishi, telling Bhushan’s stories through song. Bose mentions the ‘Gurukul’ system which is face to face teaching and he says is to be ‘…the only answer to produce better performing musicians.’ [Bose, S. 1990. p24] But my project is not about producing better music, it’s about sharing music so to me it really does not matter if the people, who adapt and tell Bhushan’s story, are not singers or performers.

Let’s talk about what a ‘Raaga’ actually is.

‘There are twelve notes or “swaras”: seven “shuddha” (major) “swaras”, sa-re-ga-ma-pa-dha-ni- and five “vikrit” (minor) ones, re-ga-ma-dha-ni. These are derived from the basic twenty-two “shrutis” (semitones)… all raagas in North Indian Music can be classified under ten “that’s” (base parent scales) as against the popular 72 “melkartas” (parent scales) prevalent in South India.’ [Bose, S. 1990. p14]

I plan on looking more into the scales that are used in Indian Classical music so that I can incorporate its harmony into the melody of my song. I need to ensure that there are elements of its spiritual context however otherwise there can be an emotional distance if I just consider the sonic and sound aspects of the music.

The purpose and function of Qawwali, Pakistani Sufi music, is defined as ‘the authentic spiritual song that transports the mystic toward union with God.’ [Qureshi, R. 2006. p1] It is through the act of listening that the “student” can ultimately be with God. Regula Qureshi says ‘…only the musician can help unlock the essence of its structure.’ [Qureshi, R. 2006. p17] This ties in with my theme of personal adaptation – each Qawwali musician could play the same song but completely reinvent it in regard to their relationship with God. Qawwali music is essentially musical settings of poems. It stimulates spiritual arousal mainly through the rhythm, which Qureshi describes as a ‘strong stress pattern within a strong rhythmic framework… often compared with the heartbeat (also called zarb’ [Qureshi, R. 2006. pp59-60] So what this means is I should specifically look at the relationship between the lyrics of my song and its rhythm, seeing how my mother or my sister may manipulate this relationship through the different use of stressed beats. I plan on looking more into the relationship between the words and rhythm in Qawwali as well as their belief system.

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Sharing Process

So, once I have finished my version of Bhushan’s story, I need to consider ways of how I am going to share/teach this to my mum and sister. It could be purely performance-listening interaction as to maintain the oral tradition. Or I could allow them to write down my lyrics or even to record my song so they can adapt it in their own time. Although this is not directly practising oral tradition, we now have the technology and the ability to read and write so maybe it could be an interpretation of this tradition in a modern world. My plan is to try several approaches and see which is the most successful or which feels the most appropriate for this project. Once I have got the recordings of each song, I will figure out a way to video Bhushan for the video EP or I will consider other visuals to accompany the music because he currently lives in Canada so it might be difficult trying to get a video from him.