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How We Can STOP Sexual Grooming

• Parents can read up on the dangers of grooming and equip themselves with the necessary knowledge to spot and ‘treat’ an issue should it come up.

• Teens can speak up for their friends, provide a listening ear or advice when they believe a friend is in danger of being groomed or bullied

• We must do talks about sex and sexual grooming in schools so the children will be aware of these things happening around them. This way, we can equip the children and stop sexual grooming from spreading

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How Journalism has Changed Anti- Grooming Laws in Malaysia

R.age’s excellent “Predator in My Phone” has created conversation, talks and change on the bill of anti- grooming laws in Malaysia.

- The new bill states that those who  sexually communicates with a child will face a maximum three-year jail term, while those who engage in child grooming — which covers communication with a child with the intention to commit offences related to child porn or child sexual assault — will face a maximum five-year jail term and whipping.

- Anyone who meets a child after child grooming — with the intention to sexually assault the child or to commit child porn offences — will be punished with a maximum 10 years’ jail term and whipping

- The offenders will be slapped with additional penalties of maximum five-year jail and minimum whipping of two strokes if they are a person “in a relationship of trust” with the child.

- The courts can allow a child’s uncorroborated evidence — even when not under oath — to be admissible evidence if it is determined that the child has “sufficient intelligence and understands the duty of speaking the truth”

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Week 3: Sexual Grooming

For the last week, we will cover the topic of sexual grooming, specifically focusing on child sexual grooming.  

DISTINGUISHING THE CONFUSION OF SEXUAL GROOMING:

1.  Sexual grooming is when the predator whom is usually older gains trust and creates emotional connection with their victims( not all are children or teenagers however mostly in Malaysia, it mostly happens to  younger victims.) In a 2010 survey, 

2.  People tend to link sexual grooming with the start of online social platforms. However, sexual grooming has happened way long before the existence of these platforms. 

3. Sexual grooming usually happens among those you love and trust rather than strangers. There have been a lot of cases where these happen among family members, teachers or family friends. According to Madeleine Yong of Protect and Save the Children, 90% of the abusers are of those they know and trust. To give a more deep explanation on this this is a quote Yong has shared on one of her cases “  “There was a college-boy who called to report that he knew someone who was a ‘sex maniac’, and wanted to know what could be done about their addiction. He later revealed that he was the victim, and the abuser was his mother, since he was 13.”

4. In the modern world, social media has definitely become a playground for these predators to easily find their victims. One of the famous social media platforms are  WeChat, Kik, BeeTalk, Facebook Messenger. 

HOW SEXUAL GROOMING TAKES PLACE:

STEP 1: TARGETING THE VICTIM

Predators usually aim children who are neglected or emotionally vulnerable, where they are more needy and has low self-esteem. Those who are not under parents supervision are definitely a goal for them to achieve.

STEP 2: GAINING THE VICTIM’S TRUST:

This is where the predators would start gathering their information. They will use these information to get their victims wrapped around their fingers. Usually older predators will make themselves as the older brother or someone who they can seek advice with. Other ways for the predators to label the relationship is:

They could try to convince the young person that they are in a loving relationship as boyfriend or girlfriend.

They might become a mentor to the young person, making them think they are someone who can help them or teach them things.

Sometimes they will become a dominant figure in a young person’s life, perhaps by having a relationship with their parent or caregiver.

They may also build a relationship with the child’s family, making them think that they are someone who can be trusted with the child

STEP 3:  FILLING THE NEEDS

Once the predator had fill what the child needs, (affection, gifts,trust) the child would slowly become more significant to the child’s life where they are idolized. 

STEP 4: ISOLATING THE CHILD

The predator would then use the developing relationship of him an the child to create situations where they are alone together. This isolation will bring in a more closer and special bong among them. Example: Babysitting, tutoring and coaching

STEP 5: SEXUALIZING THE RELATIONSHIP

At the stage where the child is the most trusting in the relationship, desensitizing will occur. This is where the groomer will make sexual acts seem normal to the child and would introduce it to them by talking and pictures 

STEP 6: MAINTAINING CONTROL

Once the sex abuse is occurring, offenders commonly use secrecy and blame to maintain the child's continued participation and silence, particularly because the sexual activity may cause the child to withdraw from the relationship Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/child-sexual-abuse-6-stages-of-grooming#ixzz4oYGAwkh8

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Let’s end this

NO MORE!  They said they would kill me.  I was four. I believed them.  No more. Speak your truth.  Feel to heal.  Freedom is on the other side.

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Ending The Confusion About Sexual Abuse

One our interview with Madam Yeoh, she said how people are always linking sexual abuse and domestic violence as something that only happens between a husband and a wife.

We want to take this opportunity to enlighten you how the abuse don just happen in a marriage. However, it also happens between a parent and a child, foster children, and any relationships that happens within closed doors.

It was also said by Madam Yeoh that these problems are not only affecting the physical part of the victim, however it also crushes the mentality and soul of a human.

Although these happens to both men and women respectably. For this topic, we will enlighten m ore about the abuse that is happening to the women in Malaysia.

Let us stand tall together and fight for what is right. MALAYSIA BOLEH !

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An Interview with Betty Yeoh of AWAM

We were honored to spend precious time with AWAM’s very own Betty Yeoh. At the age of 62, Yeoh whom was one of the first members to join AWAM is still proving you are not to old to kick butt, be a boss and still bring change into the world. We were able to hear stories on how AWAM was built and how far we have grown as a country to fight for women empowerment.  We will uncover more on her interview later on. So stay tuned to listen for more stories on Sexual Abuse in Malaysia.

Above: A picture of the Black & Blue team with Madam Yeoh

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Week 2: Sexual Abuse

On the second week of our blog, we will be covering on stories about sexual abuse in Malaysia. We will update more about sexual abuse in Malaysia where we interviewed Betty Yeoh, a member of AWAM which stands for All Women’s Action Society.

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A short video of a series of interviews we conducted with Malaysians. It was interesting to see because the people we interviewed were very heavily divided on this topic. While the first person we interviewed was a proud feminist, we were also able to interview non - feminists and see their perspective on Feminism in Malaysia. Enjoy!

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As you can see above, are the results of our survey we conducted on Facebook. The results mostly shows the division about feminism in Malaysia while others are very neutral about it

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Our research on how people are perceiving Feminism in Malaysia

To understand more about feminism in Malaysia, We decided it was time for us to roll our sleeves and conduct our own survey about it on Facebook. the results came in where it seems the people voted that feminism in Malaysia is mostly neutral. We also decided by only conducting a  survey won’t justify the results of our research. We took to the streets to ask of people’s opinion towards feminism in Malaysia. We were definitely able to see the division in how people are accepting feminism in Malaysia. Based on the questions we asked, some were really passionate about feminism while others would not be bothered by it. 

We can certainly say based on our interviews and surveys conducted, the radicalism of feminism in Malaysia is still new and people are still learning about it. Although it has been in Malaysia since the 1920′s, it is still fairly new to the people of Malaysia. 

We will provide a series of our results from the survey and a short video of us interviewing random people on the streets and restaurants of Malaysia

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Top: Syed Sheikh Al- Hadi

Bottom: Zainal Abidin bin Ahmad

These people played an important role in the history of Feminism where they were one of the first documented advocates to fight for the importance of education to liberate the women and girls of Malaysia or Malaya, at that time.

Salute to you, Sirs

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History of Feminism in Malaysia

The history of feminism in Malaysia is very different to the United States and Britain as feminism in those respected countries started due to the fact that women were not allowed to vote. However, this was not an issue as like other postcolonial contries, during the fall of the British empire in Malaysia, all Malaysian citizen's male and women were granted the right to vote during the country's independence in 1957 Even the term "feminism" is slightly different in Malaysia than other Western Countries. Feminism in Malaysia is more to "women's liberation" while Western countries describe feminism as equality.

 As we have made the terms clear, let's start on how the feminism movement started in Malaysia.

 The first documentation of "women liberation" was dated back to the 1920's while Malaysia had started its radical movement to become an independent country, propaganda and movements were all around town. One of the most popular mediums to promote these movements were by writing it in the newspapers. So, one of the first recorded "women liberation" were actually created by Malay Muslim male advocates, Syed Sheikh Al-Hadi and Zainal Abidin Ahmad or better known as "Za'aba". They advocated the inportance of education to women and girls as a means to women emancipation.

 However, there are Malay Muslim Modernist groups or the "kaum muda" whom stressed more on the importance if Islamic learning as a way of equipping Malay women with skills to fulfill their primary role as educators of their children.

 In the post-war years between 1946 and 1948, women from different ethnic groups mobilised against anti-colonialism and issues related to women's inferior status in occupied Malaya. Although they were members of the female-arm of nationalist and communist parties founded by men, the women became more radicalised in their gender-oriented anti-colonial aims and eventually gained semi-autonomous status from their parent parties. Prominent radical women of the period included the likes of Shamsiah Fakeh and later, Khatijah Sidek.

 That's the end of our lesson on the history of "feminism" in Malaysia.

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Other examples of how the feminism movement has changed Hollywood. Other movies include the new Ghostbusters in 2016

will always be relevant to me

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The 13th Doctor Who will be portrayed by a female. Feminism done right!

“I never thought I wanted a female Doctor Who - until I got one” - New Statesman

However, this change has received mixed feelings, where fans of Doctor Who have showed their love or hate on social media of the 13th doctor

What are your thoughts on the massive change in Pop Culture?

Well, love it or hate it, it looks like the Doctor is here to stay

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A good read to learn how Malaysian women are portraying their unique toll Feminist ways from a Westerner’s point of view.

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Week 1: FEMINISM

Greetings children, on our first week of Women Empowerment Class, we will venture into the land of feminism in Malaysia. We will update more on Feminism in Malaysia.

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“Why Black and Blue?”

As a group, we came up with the “Black and Blue” concept to portray the stories we would cover which will revolve around women’s issues around Malaysia. “Black and Blue” represents the bruises women have overcome, or are still dealing with in today’s society. We would like to be the voice for those who are too afraid to speak for their own.