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I don’t believe tsw*ft is a revolutionary or even interesting artist but she *is* the only artist who has her own folder on my phone dedicated to lyrics that make me incandescent with rage so from a perverse conceptual perspective I guess something is working

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beauty standards are so fucked up what happened to i love your body because it's you. what then.

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was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

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An Idea To Prevent A Nuclear War

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(by feelim)

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Seth Gordon was in like half the first book and honestly still served cunt. He came, he slurred, he died.

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It will get cold again eventually. The summer will not last forever. I’m not doomed to live in this unbearable heat for all eternity. <- said while gripping the countertop so hard that the tile is starting to crack

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I’ve been away but the fox/seagull gryphon crossed my dash and this morning I made some trash gryphons.

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apparently someone in Edinburgh has been updating the street signs for pride

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Everyone warns you agaist going to the supermarket hungry, but nobody tells you about the dangers of going there too full: I do not want any of these things, for I will never require any food again at all!

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a funny thing about having a Problematic Blorbo is that you'll periodically come across a post along the lines of "um let's not forget that [Blorbo] is a bad person..." listing their various crimes, and if you have a modicum of intellectual honesty you find yourself nodding along and saying yeah it's true... but it's the greyness of their character that makes them so compelling... At the same time though you have a little Saul Goodman in your ear going "your honor in their defense: who cares like omfgggg who caresssssss like come onnnnnn"

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having anti punitive justice morals sucks because you want to say "man that guy sucks he should get hit with hammers until he dies" but you also want to make it clear you don't think anyone should be put in charge of the 'hit people with hammers until they die" machine.

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How does superglue REFUSE to come out of the tube when you're actively trying to get some out, but as soon as you give up and put it down, the damn thing decides it's time to do world's best pineapple-with-a-werewolf-boyfriend -impression?

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teen wolf is fr show of all time. their commitment to using edm makes it work. introduce the most dog coded character and go this is a werewolf. scott genuinely thinking lycanthropy is a disease. the asshole jock character is that way because he's adopted and his best friend is a gay guy who btw everyone likes. scott being shocked allisons family are werewolf hunters versus jackson immediately going “it makes sense. argent in french is silver” jackson hating scott so bad because hes suddenly good at lacrosse that he genuinely tries to murder him. scott not caring that there might be a serial killer on the loose bc he just wants his inhaler back bc those things are like 50 dollars. scott also not caring that hes a werewolf bc hes got work and homework and lacrosse and a pretty girl to impress. and his genius sarcastic best friend has adhd. and all of this happened in the first season.

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get 🥺 men 🥺 flowers 🥺