brightbleuu

[brightbleuu]

Uhhhhhh yeah

We should make tiramisu instead, and then I'll continue to watch the edits :]

HEYYYY!!! HEYYYY!! HEYYYY!!!🦉

Helllllloooooooooo

Hi. Hi

Hi.

I'm here to bother you after so long hehehhehehhe

just because you're bored.

[brightbleuu]

Mutual Love and One-Sided Obsession

Love is mutual and that's the fundamental difference of MiziSua and IvanTill. That's what Ivan understood in his final moments - and that's why he said his feelings were shallow.

Prefacing this, not really an analysis but more of a personal connection and overview of the songs of alnst, with a quote from Richard Siken on love.

"If it was unrequited, it wasn't your first love, it was your first desire. You've got all your loves ahead of you. That sounds pretty great to me."

My Clematis; Love and the Significance of a Duet

My Clematis is a song that stands out amidst all other Alien Stage performances. Not only because it's a duet with the intentions of a tie, but also because Mizi and Sua are singing this song to and for each other. Instead of catering to the audience before them, they look to each other. In an act of defiance, they love each other. Sua sings to Mizi, as Mizi sings to Sua and this performance isn't for anyone else but them. It's beautiful, enchanting and Sua's death is made more painful by that love that's so clearly shown to the audience. Even as Sua is taken away from Mizi, nobody can deny the fact that they love each other. That the feeling between them was undeniably love.

Unknown (Till the End...); Idolization

In juxtaposition to My Clematis' heavy focus on the duet between Mizi and Sua, UTTE makes it a point to show how Till takes the spotlight all for himself one-sidedly, not even allowing his opponent to sing. In a way, this represents the extent of Till's idolization - only his feelings, the admiration for this idealized version of Mizi he has in his head are sang and borderline shouted out. The other singer is drowned out in Till's intense voice and declaration of love;

"Ain't nobody but you're the one that I'm feeling it's love"

However, Till fails to realize that the thing he wanted - Mizi's gaze to look back at him too - is rooted in reciprocity. It means allowing the other singer to get their voice out, it means allowing this preconceived notion he has of her in his head to be shattered by the reality of who Mizi truly is. UTTE is a representation of how Till's deluded image of Mizi overpowers the reality he currently lives in, it's a form of escape for someone who has always been shackled by chains.

It's a contradiction present in the song itself;

"I wanna know all about you (ya)"

For all Till sings that he wants to get to know Mizi, he never attempts to get closer to her and always, in his view of her, she's far away like an idol he can't reach. Like a god to a sinner that needs saving. It's the first desire of wanting to be saved, of wanting a saint to reach out their hand to you. And that first desire, as much as Till proclaims it to be love for its intensity, is known as something that's not love, something closer to obsession because of that very same intensity. Because that intensity prevents him from loving who Mizi truly is apart from who she represents in his head - again, it drowns it out.

Black Sorrow; Unrequitedness

Black Sorrow starts off with an admission; Ivan can't reach Till. He'll always follow him, even if he recognizes that all this will end in is tragedy. He constantly speaks of an absence - foreshadowing of Cure perhaps, but also of Till leaving him and turning back, of Till always choosing to not stay by his side, to chase for an unreachable idol. To the viewer, Black Sorrow is a song solely focused on Ivan but we can see in the video that Ivan allows his opponent to sing - a representation of his subservient nature but also perhaps of the fact he sees Till. He allows Till to sing out in deafening roars and sees him for what he is, and admires him for that. In contrast to UTTE's idealistic nature, Black Sorrow is very much rooted in reality. Till is pointedly not awake during this song - once again, he doesn't see Ivan but also he is not woken up to the reality that Ivan forces him to face. If not rooted in love because of the acknowledgement of unrequitedness, then what is Ivan's desire? It's to drown in his chosen black sea of sorrow.

Cure; Obsession and the Significance of a Duet

Ivan and Till both sing to someone who is not listening, they both sing to someone who is not looking at them in contrast to My Clematis.

"Dissolve me in your gaze

...

Please, leave me scars

Please, hurt me so that

Not a single drop of me remains

Let me drown in you"

Till wants to drown in the fantasy he's created for himself - going back to the sinner analogy, he wants everything of him that he views as wrong cleansed by Mizi's saintly presence. For once, Till lacks the same conviction he did before - he's pleading now, and asking as if praying to a dead god. Maybe it's because he thinks Mizi is gone, maybe it's because he thinks he's beyond saving.

"May they linger on your tongue

You can break me apart

...

I'll drown in you"

Ivan remains the same, steadfast in his determination and doubling down on his declarations in Black Sorrow. He doesn't ask - he knows his 'love' is unrequited, but that he will drown in it anyways.

"To this everlasting melody

Face to face we dance

With our story

Lost in forever's embrace"

Despite the lyrics stating that they stand face to face, they don't - one is always looking away. That's why, the story of what they are and what could've came to be is lost in the embrace of a time that's both not there and forever there. What they could've been is not what they are because of that everlasting melody, the obsession the two of them have that is distinctly not love because it's unrequited. Because they will always ask to be consumed in another's gaze instead of simply looking at each other and seeing. Because Till's first desire is to be saved and Ivan's first desire is to drown, the round would have always ended that way.

"Thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions."

Ivan thought he and Sua were similar at one point. He felt jealous when he realized that the fundamental difference between them was that Sua was loved, and he was not. I think that in his final moments, he recognized this jealousy for what it was - the incessant human need to be loved and to be wanted. And what does that love entail? He sees it in Mizi and Sua, it means loving and being loved in return. That's what love is, and with heartbreaking clarity, he understands that it's not what has driven him or Till this far. A one-sided obsession could never be love, because love is always mutual. To love is to be seen, to be known. Ivan was not the former, Till was not the latter.

He steels himself, he will drown in these shallow emotions, just as he always planned (even if the sacrifice was not). He knows this sacrifice seems hypocritical, but it couldn't be with such a simple yet clear difference.

Compared to the deep grief brought about by the deep and intense emotions of love and loss, the pain he will cause Till will only be as shallow as his own emotions. Because it only reached Ivan, only drowned him and it never seemed to reach Till.

[brightbleuu]

https://twitter.com/_k4uo/status/1778757109603279286

chat what if i fucking cry

[brightbleuu]

I want to be loved like how Ivan loved Till because wtf.

Ivan looked at Till with such delicacy, but at times, he'd be looking at him with such sadness. It's as if he knew that Till would never look at him, and he was fine with that. Like in Round 3 (Black Sorrow) around 2:34 - 2:46 you can see when till looks at ivan with guilt and goes back and all you see is Ivan face being filled with sadness because he knew that he wouldn't change Till's mind about not going back to save/stay with mizi. As well as when Ivan's facial expressions change from sadness to him completely collecting himself (2:46 - 2:50) and him reaching out his hand as if he was trying to reach out to Till in that moment when they were kids escaping.

If you really think about it, nothing was gonna ever change Ivan's fate. Yes, Ivan could've lived, but he would would've just been another person in Till's world. Till, on the other hand, would've still continued to look/try to catch Mizi's attention every chance he gets.

if it weren't to save Till in round 6, when Ivan dies, till wouldve died because tbh Ivan should've been the one to win but he didnt want that for till if it meant killing himself for it. But now, this time, Till has now finally seen Ivan!! Im sure Till will be haunted for the rest of his life after finally realizing that ivan loved him. Maybe even so much it changes the way he once viewed Ivan as. I sure hope he finds peace soon after all my baby has been through.

[brightbleuu]

Eng -Esp (6/6)

Idea:

Till knows what it looks like to be loved but doesn't know what it feels like.

Till sabe como se ve ser amado pero no sabe como se siente

!! Inspired by this youtube comment I read time ago:

[brightbleuu]

I don't care what anyone says, Ivan's love language is physical touch.

[brightbleuu]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH TO ALL MY GAYS OUT THERE

Specifically speaking these two

[brightbleuu]

Awesome, thank you for the tag :>

May Picrew! (i feel and i probably made this extremely innacurate. like alot) and it isnt late (shocker) Tags: @Iomni @dazais-crab-addiction @jounosparticles @circuslemon @morphestic @causticacoustic @pixieinanotheruniverse @osameowdazai @krowkorvus @aaabatteryy @bungoustraypups @squidsandthings @sara-mjrb @starisenby @hyakkigura @im-a-chunky-potato @minusboy @konstancjawojciechowska @tittysuckersworld @bunglegaydogs @oribun @lovelyalicorn @glue-thief @lovelyalicorn @creatorbiaze @wildflowerteas @bloop-n-dupe @chuuya-brainrot @bnesszai @syunkiss @someonebeatmetotheseusernames @evermorethecrow @koihanwrites @shank-ey @rye-rice @yumeyumeappleo @1seaweedbrain1

No pressure obviously, this stuff is just for funsies EDIT: TAGS DIDNT TAGGGG AHHH

[brightbleuu]

I DID NOT!💀😭

finally watched alien stage (I was threatened) with my friend (Vee held me at gunpoint) and I'm so glad i'm actually pretty normal about the whole thing. the fandom worries me though I think they need serious therapy.

[brightbleuu]

crossover with alien stage

edits are mine

[brightbleuu]

My day has been good. I've been eating gummies all day... and a piece of chicken I made this morning as well as some yogurt. Apart from that, I'm doing absolutely nothing but on my phone. Reading. ALSO YAY another job you have to apply for👏👏

Yk what how about this. Tmr you wake up and clean your room first, and then after that, you make the application and turn it in. It sounds pretty simple, but ik for sure you'll be killing yourself in the process.

Sucks to be you, man. Also, share that lemonade... I'm hungry and thirsty. Also to keep you busyyyyyy............... QUESTION!

How was your day today?!?! Apart from boring and doing absolutely nothing

Anxiety ridden because i'm procrastinating like a damn professional. Vee you should kick my ass as and force me to do the planning session AND apply to that job my mom wants me to get. and clean my room.

[brightbleuu]

[brightbleuu]

i'm going to block you 😠🫵

:0 Oh My Gatos don't do that :(

[brightbleuu]

@ALNSTIVAN on Twitter/X

[brightbleuu]

I'm currently suffering from an illness. That illness is Ivantill.

[brightbleuu]

THE MUFFIN MAN!!!

DYKTMM!?!?!??!!!?

TMM??

[brightbleuu]

😧what! I LOOK LIKE THAT?!?!?!?😭

Nom. Nom. Nom.

You! You should be asleep.