bxnetired-blog

[bxnetired-blog]

i have a feeling i missed a lot of things. good for that kid, though. sleeping through their trials or not, i’m rooting for ‘em. what was in the radio broadcast?

@bxnetired YOU MISSED THE RADIO BROADCAST YESTERDAY CHARA GOT PAST ALPHYS YOU MISSED THE RADIO BROADCAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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[opens door] [gets on floor] [that’s it. that’s all i do. i’m not dancing. i am, in fact, just lying down on the floor.]

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man. it’s like i’m a bucket of angst.

hang a fishing rod over me and see what problem you pull up.

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He clung onto the hug, bony fingers gripping Sans’ clothing like if he so much as slightly slackened his grip, the other would slip entirely away from him. He burrowed as tightly as he could against his brother and buried his face against his shoulder, like if he just tried hard enough he could hide from the world as he had done so many times when they were both younger, and he was actually smaller than his stout sibling.

(And maybe that was what he needed; to hide himself, when he had been previously shielding Sans from what he had feared would hurt him so - maybe even break him. 

It had just broken Papyrus himself, instead.)

“........... i don’t know.” He eventually admitted, the answer muffled against the other’s ‘battle body’ shoulder pad. He had more than lost count as to the length of the resets. Long enough for him to lose interest in becoming a Royal Guard. Long enough for him to find no proper rest at night and infrequent fits of slumber during the day.

How long was that? He couldn’t tell.

Papyrus didn’t want to agree to the promise at the same time that he simultaneously did. He was usually an open individual, calm and composed and accepting, not one that cradled all these stories to his chest and kept them locked up tight in his ribcage - except that wasn’t true anymore, because he had been concealing the knowledge of the resets from his older sibling for time innumerous. 

No matter how he felt like, he was a secret-keeper now. If not by nature, then by something learnt for so long that it was well-ingrained within him by this point.

“i don’t want to burden you with this, though.” Papyrus stared down at the blue fabric before his eyes, unable or unwilling to lift them and meet his brother’s gaze. “i know you don’t want me to suffer by myself, but... i don’t want you to have to deal with this either.

i know, though. i know, you deserve to be aware of this. it’s what’s right. i don’t want to, but that’s not good. this is what it should be. i know.

......yeah, bro. i promise.”

“Papyrus…”

He wasn’t sure what to say, forced optimism or not. (”We can get through this,” he wanted to say, but how could he say that when he didn’t really believe that himself?)

For a few long moments, he faltered, before finally deciding to pull his brother in for a gentle hug, giving a quiet humming noise, expression turning to a frown of worry.

“…it’s not stupid,” he finally murmured. “I knew you probably had your reasons. I just… want to be able to be there for you too, you know?” Sans paused for a moment before adding, “…how long have you known?”

“And– and… if things reset again… can you promise to tell me about all of this again? Regardless of how I may respond? I just– I don’t want you to be alone in this. Please…?”

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“because i didn’t want you to deal with what i did.”

He had already admitted the truth; better to suck all the venom out of the wound now rather than leave part of the splinter in to niggle at him forever.

“i’m so tired, sans. and you’re so... not. i hid it from you because i didn’t want you to know all those terrible things you dreamt about have happened before.

“i know you’re not always as cheerful as you act, y’know, bro? didn’t want you to lose even more of that hope than what you had already.

“i dunno. sounds stupid when i put it that way, doesn’t it? in the end... guess it’s just because i wanted to protect you, like we always do for each other. even if i didn’t do it so good this way. 

“i’m sorry.”

He’d known he had likely died before; he’d already talked to a few friends about this already. But it was good to hear it from Papyrus. Still, he felt off. The fact was that he’d been lied to, repeatedly. And… what was he supposed to do with this? His notepad of possible scenarios couldn’t prepare him for actually talking about it.

Sans wasn’t sure what to do.

Slowly, he approached his brother.

He wrung his hands together, still unable to look his brother in the eye.

“…why did you hide this from me?”

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His own stare wavered, then broke.

Papyrus looked to the side, a deep, bone-rattling sigh shuddering out of his ribs through gritted teeth.

He had been hoping against hope that Sans would never find the truth, that even despite hopping through all these different timelines he would still be able to protect his brother as best he could, to keep him ignorant on what he himself knew.

He had been lying to him for so long...

But every castle has to crumble.

Exhausted, finally yielding to the wavering resolve against keeping the secret burning his jaws, he pressed his head into his hand and spoke. 

Quietly, he pried out the words he had clenched his teeth on again and again.

“... yes.”

[cont’d from here]

He wasn’t sure what was worse for him; that he was bothering Papyrus with this now, or that Papyrus was still trying to cover it all up. His hands curled up into nervous fists at his side and he squared his shoulders, though he also ducked his head, unable to meet his brother’s gaze.

“I– I think you know exactly what I’m trying to talk about,” he forced out, trying to keep his voice steady. He’d prepared all day for this. He couldn’t back out now. “The– timeline. The– the things called resets. It’s– hard to– traverse timelines, and, not hear about what’s going on.”

He grit his teeth a little bit, staring straight down at the ground. “I really did die before, didn’t I? That wasn’t a dream.”

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"They're not just dreams, are they?" He was scared. He didn't want to do this, but he had to do this sooner rather than later. Better to pull the metaphorical bandage off now.

He had already been turning, ready to greet his brother with the usual casual grin and half-lidded gaze he usually did, when Sans uttered the words he had been dreading since the first reset he heard him recite practically verbatim.

Sweat broke out on the back of his head, crawling down his spine like the lies he had used to dismiss the idea of the nightmares ever having been memory. His smile was still the same, stare still as calm as he could manage. But Papyrus was anything but that inside.

“what are you talking about, bro?” He said, casual as he pleased.

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you don’t tell me what to do.

just, i love you, but you can’t have mayonnaise in this household, what the hell is wrong with you

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Sans was quick to hop up and lean against Papyrus, sliding a box over to his brother. The box contains a few more prank items: some whoopie cushions, a bottle of lube, more sticky notes than any single person reasonably needs. And, of course, an obscenely large bottle of mayonnaise. Because you, Papyrus, are a bad monster.

An ever-present lazy grin stretched wider at the presence of his brother, a bony elbow lovingly digging into the other’s ribs in greeting as he peered into the contents of his present.

“hey. thanks for this sweet junk, bro.”

The mayonnaise is put upon the coffee table for later consumption, while the whoopee cushions and notes disappear inside the orange hoodie’s pockets with a parting ‘pffrt’ in farewell.

However, the lube? The skeleton examines the bottle with mild curiosity, reading over the label printed upon it. With a shrug, he cracks the cap off and pours the contents in his mouth. What a horrifying creature.

(Within Sans’ room, the older sibling would later find a carefully wrapped box. Now how had that gotten there? Papyrus hadn’t left his side. 

Mysteries aside, within the present would be a soft horse plush, flank adorned with removable saddle and armour. Happy birthday, Sans. That’s what the season is, right?)

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daily reminder that my brother is the best individual ever and deserves all the great things in the world.

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oh, that’s good. 

remember to tell her to not give you a greeting suplex this time, bro. it’ll be just your luck to be careful not to hurt yourself and then she breaks your finger again for you because you knocked her door down.

nnnnnnnnngh

yeah yeah yeah i know, i know i know and i know you know and they know too, probably, i mean

but

i just feel weird and wrong

…oh, uh, undyne offered that i could come by her lab to get looked at? got told to not just roll in though. didn’t say anything about not kicking the door down though!

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i know you don’t, and that’s why i’m concerned. 

you’re gonna throw yourself right back into the hardcore stuff the moment i say go, bro. i know it. you know it. the human probably knows it and they’re not even here right now.

i’m makin’ you wait because if you’re not 100% healed and you go right to, i dunno, carving boulders or something, you’re probably gonna hurt yourself more. you oughta rest more, hey. play more video games with me or something, maybe. 

it’s BEEN four weeks

i’m FINE!!! it still hurts to type, yes, but come on, i don’t like doing nothing like this, you know that!

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f a l l e n  d o w n

my hcs for underswap chara/frisk:

chara is still a pretty angry/distrustful child bitter towards humanity, and at first they were probably not very keen on befriending monsters like frisk wanted them to and would actually be actively against it, but *papyrus voice* u can’t escape friendship. in the end they grow very fond of all the monsters and consider them to be a family they never had.

frisk as the first child would be?? i feel like they’d be described to be a good person; even more martyric than chara in their cause to poison themself to free the monsters. but they wouldn’t be against killing humans/attaining six human souls to achieve that goal – like a well intended extremist/the end justifies the means kind of person.

but some things just don’t change :’)

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you can do them later. 

like, in two weeks.

DON’T SIT ON ME!!!

I HAVE THINGS TO DO, BROTHER

[bxnetired-blog]

i live. maybe, i dunno. i’m kinda alive, probably.

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✿? ;))

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text.

[To: other sexy rectangle] you look so hot literally all of the time.

[To: other sexy rectangle] it really gets to me..

[To: other sexy rectangle] like, is it because you live in hotland. maybe you should move. that place kinda sucks anyway.

[To: other sexy rectangle] are you overheating. did your designer not give you a sufficient ventilation system.

[To: other sexy rectangle] i can’t stop thinking about it. consider me vaguely concerned for you, buddy.

[bxnetired-blog]

✉ ツ &

Send “✉” for a text that WASN’TSENT. 

[To: bro] do you remember

[message deleted]

[To: bro] did you know

[message deleted]

[To: bro] i don’t even know whereto start. what do i want to say?

[To: bro] you deserve the greatestfriends in the world. i’m so sorry for every time the human still gets you, nomatter how hard i try to protect you. 

[To: bro] i’m so tired,sans. 

[messages deleted]

[To: bro] hey, man. i find you pretty humerus evendespite your absolutely awful taste in puns. i love you.

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text. 

[To: bro] sans holy fuck.

[To: bro] did you know... there is actually a gun that humansmade. with a knife designedto be attached to it. isn’t that ridiculous. that sounds more dangerous tothe wielder than anything else.

[To: bro]isn’t that great.

Send “&” for a LOVING text. 

[To: bro] hey. so i know you’vealways thought about galloping on a trusty steed once we reached the surface,clearing fields of grass at top speeds.

[To: bro] well, now that we’rehere.....

[To: bro] you should checkoutside.

[To: bro]i love you, bro. go get ‘em tiger.