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Life Hack: Heal yourself and don’t completely rely on others to heal you. When you rely solely on one person to heal you, sometimes the weight of holding you up will get to be too much for them, and they’ll cave. They’ll let you down. If you’re depending on them to hold you up, you’ll fall too. Instead of allowing people to carry you, learn to walk on your own. You don’t need anyone to “fix” you. You only need yourself.

Notes on Healing | (Morsus Engel) | (via actuates)

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Autumn is here.

Carefully stepping over fallen wattle, yellow like a lemon. The bees swarmed the wattle as they pollinate.

So used to Summer I forgot the little parts of Autumn. I forgot that I could no longer feel my toes without fluffy socks on. I forgot the rush that takes over when the rain drops start to fall and my clothes are on the washing line.  I forgot the frosty windows that I awake to of a morning.

But mainly I forgot that I need to create my own body warmth, as yours is no longer present.

As the Autumn leaves gather in a pile on the grass, It makes me remember that once a leaf falls, another starts to grow. The cycle of life goes on and on, Even though it takes little reminders to realise. When you are feeling worn out, used, not as bright as the new leaves, Just remember my darling, It is never to late to grow again. - C.C.

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The Tide - A dream I once deeply felt.

The cold sand curved around,

Between my bear toes,

As I approached the shore, the crisp air hit my face.

Breathe.

Breathe.

The tip of my toes touched the icy water.

In and out,

I watch as the waves come and go.

 Was it a metaphor?

What comes must in time go.

These feelings will hit, and they will hit hard.

But my dear,

They will drift away, just as fast as the tides.

 Paddling deeper until my body was underwater,

Let this water disintegrate my tears.

Let the salt soothe my skin.

Let the ocean waves block my ears to the sound of others hatred.

My breath was escaping but I counted to ten.

 TEN

I released my breath. Emerging

The water beneath me,

The cool air dries my drenched hair.

 I lay myself on the moist sand,

And look up at the evening sky.

I have breath in my lungs,

I belong.

I belong to myself.

I belong to these tides.

I am whole.

-       C.C.

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Trapped.

Do you ever feel trapped? Trapped in a situation that feels unable to escape. Trapped in a body that you feel isn’t completely yours? Yes, it is yours but you feel outside of it. Watching your days play out the same.

 Your mind wonders, You dream big, You want to be free, Free from meaningless pain.

You want to stand on the cliff and shout, But who will hear you besides the humming birds?

 Leave this place. But where would you go. You lose control of your body, At what cost?

You are asked if you are okay, But are you really? What is okay defined as? Physically… Mentally… Personally Or all of the above.

Mind scattered. Heart on the mend. My darling, I really am fine. Every day I get one step closer to my freedom Every day, The flowers are blossoming in my soul. Let my garden have water. Give it the strength it needs. Give me the strength.

-       C.C.

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Home.

Was home a place? A person? A friend? Or was home really just a feeling?

To me, home is those small moments. Like the moment you pulled me closer and held me tight. The sound of the rain drops bouncing off the car roof. The night would soon come to an end, Like everything always does.

But in that moment, Nothing else mattered. For the first time in what felt like an eternity.

I was home.

-       C.C.

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“Beautiful, in my own different way.”

What would happen if we accepted our so called ‘flaws?’

If pimples were trendy,

If cellulite was acceptable,

If veins in strange places on our legs were merely just

‘Genetics’

If cracked, red lips were just proof of colder days.

If we stopped focusing on all of our different ways,

If we embraced what we have been given.

 I wish we could view ourselves from someone else’s eyes.

See the way we sleep calmly in our beds,

See the way we smile when someone makes our day brighter.

See our faces glow when the vibrant sun hits our pale face.

 We may not see ourselves,

But we can be ourselves.

 Give your body the love it deserves, you only have one.

One temple of life,

For the rest of your days.

This skin will never be as soft as it is in this instant,

Your nails never as strong,

Your eyes will never see as clearly as right now,

And your heart, well that is beating very fast right now.

Worship your temple, every inch of it.

Because one day,

You will be saying to your grandchildren,

“God I remember the days when I looked like that,

I would do anything to rewind the time.”

 Give that elderly, humble lady the courage to say,

“I was, am, and always will be, beautiful in my own different way.”

 -       C.C.