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The Cats movie and the ‘live action’ Lion King exist at opposite ends of a spectrum but idk what said spectrum is

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I just love how with two simple words, we’re told that Crowley 100% already knows what’s going on with the Ark, he just played dumb to have an excuse to talk to Aziraphale.

He should not know the name of Noah’s son if he hasn’t a clue what’s going on here, but he does know the name of Noah’s son, which mean he’s a Lying Liar Who Lies.

Like, I’ve seen some posts that talk about how Crowley let the kids braid his hair and such, and I just imagine him hanging out with Noah and his sons for a while, befriending the kids

Definitely Not Helping, because he’s a demon, after all. I mean, if you think about the story of Noah and then try to figure out what Crowley is doing there, his job there is officially probably to stop everyone from believing Noah and his family, but he doesn’t really have to lift a finger for that. His first experience with humans doing his work for him, really.

And as the time of the storm approaches, Noah loading animals into the ark, Crowley supervising, he sees a figure in white and then immediately says to himself, “right, time to act dumb so that the pretty angel will talk to me again.”

I mean, look at the way he’s looking at Aziraphale. That is the face of a demon thinking, “Gosh, you’re cute. Let’s find a tent and make-out like the world’s about to flood.”

You should also, Definitely For Science, see Crowley’s expression when Aziraphale starts to explain the Ark to him.

“Ah, yes, I definitely, 100% know nothing about this. First I’m hearing of it, honestly!”

Crowley, you’re a dumbass, and I love you.

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You know every show that the premise is like “people find out ghosts/monsters/demons are real and are charged with stopping them” appeal to me way more now as a post-graduate not because I believe in ghosts more or whatever but because can you IMAGINE just being handed a job that you don’t even need to apply for? Like just being told “basically there’s this bad thing and all you do is make sure it doesn’t do what it wants” that’s just customer service baby and I worked that for 6 goddamn years! Just TRY getting past “I have a job to offer you” before I can jump down your throat agreeing.

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“Scars can come in handy. I have one myself above my left knee that is to perfect map of the London Underground.” 

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As cat owners we like to joke about how the cat is the one who’s really in charge, but let’s be honest here: my cats think they’re in charge, but they’re also fucking dumbasses. It’s sort of an incompetent-king-and-long-suffering-advisor arrangement, if the king were prone to getting their head stuck in Kleenex boxes.

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I hate to be the one to ruin the "and there was only one bed" headcanon that all good omens fans have but we know that Crowley can sleep on the walls and the roof which to me makes that night so much funnier. Imagine poor Aziraphale lying in bed staring awkwardly up at Crowley who's snoring above him

Poor Aziraphale, he doesn’t even sleep but he was very much down for some snuggles

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Snek blep featuring the one

the only

Anthony

Janthony

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i like to imagine that bentley just fuckin BLASTS romantic music whenever they ride together

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Crowley is soft for children pass it on

Bonus:

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Clothes Crowley 100% owns

Booty shorts that say Weapon of Mass Distraction on the ass

Duck onesie

Many shirts/jackets with wings on the back and an angel wing shawl

Graphic t-shirt with image of cupped hands across the tits

Snake ear crawlers

Rainbow snakeskin patterned leggings

Anything Aziraphale has lent him in the winter ever

That lingerie that's really just a snake costume on your dick

Floral bandanas to wear over his hair

Skimpy angel Halloween costume

Wristband that reads Sinning is Winning

Aromatherapy pendant

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“if i run and leap at crowley, he will Most Certainly catch me in his arms”  based on this scene in brooklyn 99!! (i skipped to the part but the whole video is good™): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIhl1cW9Me8&feature=youtu.be&t=32