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Shout out to all the Black ppl that can no longer participate directly in the fandom they love because of the stresses of racism 👍🏾 you contain multitudes of value and I'm sorry that the color of your skin and the power of your voice makes people not want to acknowledge that.
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Thinking of how the Kryptonian legend that the name Nightwing comes from is the story of a man who was cast away by his family and still dreamed of protecting the weak and justice, and after Clark explained how the man in the myth used his talent and skill to fight for the weak and became a legend, Dick’s first question was “did his family ever realize their mistake?”
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I forget where I saw the headcanon first, but I unapologetically adore the idea that Lambert, who is SO angry about how the grown witchers treat their candidates, also viciously hates anyone who ISN'T polite to prostitutes. He's been thrown out of many, MANY whorehouses because he heard someone abusing one of the ladies (or gentlemen) and beat the john bloody. (And probably had several other places offer him decent prices because they know they'll be safe while he's in town. The first time that happened, he was SHOCKED.)
But ooooh, yes, give the boys a place to REST and eat well and experience some actual kindness. *snuggles each of them*
It’s rare for more than one witcher to pass through Novigrad at the same time, so Eskel is pleasantly surprised to hear that Geralt is in town.
When he goes to find him, however, he walks in on Geralt sharing drinks with another man—a brightly dressed, pretty young thing Eskel immediately assumes must be a prostitute.
It isn’t until later, after Eskel awkwardly tries to pay for services, that he learns the truth.
The “prostitute” is Jaskier.
Which means Eskel has, in fact, just attempted to buy sex from his brother’s lover.
And now he needs to find a hole to crawl into and die.
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It’s Little Knit Pumpkin pattern release day! You can now get the pattern for ✨free✨ on my blog!
These sweet wee pumpkins are knit up in the round using scrap fingering weight yarn, and can be knit as a pumpkin sprite (with legs and eyes) or as a regular pumpkin.
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Jaskier lets him down so GENTLY though! So calmly, and even sweetly! There's no trace of "ew, how could you think that" or "how DARE you suggest that I - " just a very calm "oh Eskel, darling, I'm sorry. We should have explained. My name is Jaskier, and what Geralt and I share...it's rather new. We didn't mean to confuse you or lead you on, I promise."
The kindness only makes Eskel more in love. NO ONE is that kind to witchers, especially ones whom they've just met, who then called them a whore! Jaskier should be furious, and that he's kind instead is just devastating.
(Jaskier comes back the next day. "Geralt and I talked a bit. Would you like to spend the night with us?" Would Eskel - would he like a cartload of gold, all his scars and old wounds to heal perfectly, and to never fight another monster again?
Just grant all his dreams at once, bard.)
It’s rare for more than one witcher to pass through Novigrad at the same time, so Eskel is pleasantly surprised to hear that Geralt is in town.
When he goes to find him, however, he walks in on Geralt sharing drinks with another man—a brightly dressed, pretty young thing Eskel immediately assumes must be a prostitute.
It isn’t until later, after Eskel awkwardly tries to pay for services, that he learns the truth.
The “prostitute” is Jaskier.
Which means Eskel has, in fact, just attempted to buy sex from his brother’s lover.
And now he needs to find a hole to crawl into and die.
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Thinking about how I would write an adult Scooby-Doo series, because I think it can be done.
The first thing I’d do is make the characters actually be adults. Still young, but adults, in the mid to late 20s range. Mystery Inc. is a private detective type business that they run together. In this universe, the supernatural/ghosts/etc are real, but not necessarily common, so when they take on a case, the culprit might be a person disguised as a monster, or it might actually be a real ghost. The stakes can be higher; sometimes a bad guy is legitimately trying to kill them. Sometimes the mystery they’re trying to solve is a murder. Sometimes they actually get hurt on their cases.
Fred: the core of Fred’s character should be that he’s incredibly kind. Like, give a stranger the shirt off his back kind. The “Fred can’t talk to potential clients because he might take a case for free and we need to eat” kind. He’s an honest and good person and sometimes gets himself into trouble because he assumes other people are too. While he’s not very good at reading people or noticing ulterior motives, he’s brilliant when it comes to mechanical or engineering type stuff, so he’s the one who keeps the mystery machine running, builds their gadgets, and of course, designs the traps.
Daphne: she comes from old money, and her parents absolutely despise her life choices, to the point where they haven’t officially disowned her, but they have basically cut her off, so she doesn’t actually have access to any family money. Growing up wealthy has granted her a variety of skills, including speaking multiple languages, horseback riding, and fencing. She’s very into fashion and jewelry (even if she can’t afford it anymore) and has extensive knowledge of both that can occasionally provide a vital clue in a case. And even though her parents have cut her off, Daphne still has a wide network of contacts she can ask for favors sometimes, because she’s personable, and people tend to like her. Daphne is also very emotionally intelligent, and is usually the one who can spot when someone is lying to them.
Side note - I ship Fred and Daphne, so I think I would start them off as an established couple for this universe. Dating, engaged, married, I don’t care. They are stupidly in love, ride or die for each other. There’s no will they, won’t they, no worries about cheating. They are in a healthy, happy, loving relationship, and no one (not even Daphne’s disapproving parents) are going to mess that up for them.
Velma: she is the forensics nerd who sometimes gets super excited about the wrong thing at the wrong time (”He was mummified in seconds? That’s so cool!” “Velma! His wife is standing right there!” “Oh. Sorry.”). She’s not purposely insensitive, she just gets laser focused on her work and forgets to filter herself sometimes. She’s also the one who can get so fixated on solving whatever mystery they’re working on, she’s willing to bend or maybe break laws. Is breaking and entering really so bad? Not if it gets them answers.
Shaggy: he is still the comic relief, but he’s the comic relief by being the only person in the group that actually has common sense. He manages the business’s finances, he’s the only one who knows how to cook, and the others tease him for being a coward sometimes, but Shaggy maintains that if a ghost with an axe is coming for you, running is the only sensible option. He should also have a range of random knowledge that sounds useless, but sometimes saves the day (ex ventriloquism, origami, the history of spoons, etc).
Scooby: as this is a universe where supernatural creatures exist, Scooby is an ancient eldritch type being that took a shine to Shaggy when he was a kid, and took the form of a talking dog to befriend and hang out with him. Aside from the talking dog bit and not aging, he never uses his powers in a way that anyone notices. The audience is not told upfront that Scooby is an ancient eldritch being; it should slowly be hinted at throughout the series so the audience put it together, but the characters never realize it. Scooby genuinely considers Shaggy to be his best friend, and cares about the rest of the gang too.
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Next rumor:
Witchers don't have nipples. Completely smooth chests, all of them! He swears!
He's wondering whether his next song should argue that they don't have testicles (mm, free dick) or that they lack assholes and have to shit some other way. (He loves that ass so much...)
But just as he's thinking it, Geralt grabs his lute right out of his hands. "NO, JASKIER. No more 'witchers have weird bodies' songs. They just encourage people to treat us like monsters, even when I prove that I look normal. No amount of flashing my chest or ass around the continent will fix the rumors."
Geralt sets the lute gently in its case and crouches in front of Jaskier. "Besides. If you want to see me without clothes, you could just ask. As long as I get to see you the same way."
This is a lovely compromise, and Jaskier accepts. Enthusiastically. After a few days, he realizes that it meams that he doesn't have to share Geralt's gorgeous body with anyone else - and especially not with creepy, suspicious people who don't appreciate it.
Jaskier making up rumors about witchers not having belly buttons
He enjoys the way geralt has to constantly lift his shirt to prove that it's not true. A nice little peak at those abs.
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STILL NOT COMFORTING!
Lava should be deep underground where it can't burn anything!
Fire! Fire in the sky!

Do you mean a phoenix?

Phoenix! Fire bird in the sky, Geralt!


Relax, Jaskier. It's just lava

@help-help-i-need-an-adult @catscraftsandcommentary @0dde11eth @fandom-junk-drawer @random-apollo-child @thequeeninyellowlace @awitcheress @akelafang @kupocat
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So I'm reading Maskerade to my kids (they love Pterry) and there's a bit where a swan (just before it dies) sings a line from a made-up opera (called Lohenshaak). The song is called the Pedlar's Song and it's in whatever the Discworld equivalent of German is: Schneide meinen eigenen Hals... So one of my sons, just for funsies, decides to find out what the German actually means.
It means Cut My Own Throat. Because it's the PEDLAR'S SONG.
Terry Pratchett put a CMOT Dibbler reference into a song for a throwaway scene for a swan, in German. And I never knew because I don't speak German.
Did you know?? Anyway, gnu Terry Pratchett and the joy of jokes for their own sake even if only a small fraction of the readers ever notice.
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Borrowed my mom's Canon Rebel and had a few minutes today to sit down outside and play with it. Turns out, it really is that Pixel phone cameras are absolute horse shit. Her camera had no trouble at all picking up the iridescence and showing how fucking gorgeous the chimera boy is in real life.
I've decided to call him Gemini.
Click for a bigger, clearer photo, Tumblr is blurring this one in small size.
#oh god he's so pretty#I want his feathers#I can't wait to see his full tail when it grows in#peafowl
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This is awesome on so many levels.
Ladies and Gentlemen i present to you John Carpenter’s The Thing, as performed by the claymated, Antarctic cast of the hit children’s animation Pingu. Directed by Lee Hardcastle, in under 3 minutes. Noot, Noot.
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Geralt stops. Thinks.
Sends a message to Yennefer and his brothers.
"Wizard stole Jaskier. He's protected from Witchers. Bring all your non Witcher friends to Kaer Morhen."
Then he swings by Oxenfurt. A wizard wants to steal the most famous and popular bard in a generation? He - and all wizards like him - can take the hit in publicity. Geralt just has to ask Pris to spread the word.
Jaskier may, just possibly, have a point about friends being a good and useful thing.
When an aged wizard abducts Jaskier, Geralt sets out at once to rescue him. But the sorcerer is no ordinary captor—he is one of the last surviving Mages who once presided over the brutal trials that forged boys into Witchers.
He reveals a chilling truth: long ago, he wove a spell into every Witcher, a hidden safeguard that renders them both physically and mentally incapable of raising a hand against him.
Now, with Jaskier in the wizard’s grasp, Geralt must find another way to fight—without being able to strike his enemy
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I feel like tumblrites have been a bit down lately, we really could use another British Royal Family Death to boost morale.
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I may have ended up going into tech, but getting a pre-law degree and working for attorneys for a few years repeatedly saved me from getting totally ripped off in my early 20s. So many charlatans are only able to get away with their bullshit because they expect you to not know what your rights are or how to create a paper trail.
I once had a landlord try to withhold my entire security deposit after I moved out despite leaving the place in good shape. Just by writing a letter that A) cited the state statute saying a landlord must provide an itemized list with invoices for any repairs they deduct from a tenant’s security deposit, B) bluffed by declaring my intention to file suit if they did not (and cited the same statute again, which says that tenants are entitled to recover DOUBLE what the landlord withheld if they did so in bad faith) , and C) sending it via certified mail with return receipt (so they couldn’t claim not to have received it), they sent me back a check for like 2/3 of what they tried to withhold, plus the itemized list, plus an apology. I spent $2 on postage and half an hour on the letter and got back $300.
Another time, I got into a car accident (in which I was officially found not at fault) where the other person was driving a rental car. Over a year after the fact, I received a letter from some sketchy claims adjuster demanding immediate payment for around $2000 in damages to the other car. Once I stopped panicking, I gathered the info from my old insurance claim and called the adjuster, and some very snippy lady told me the letter was sent in error and I should disregard it. I followed up with her by email restating exactly what she told me on the phone, instructing them to work with my insurance company on any future inquiries about the accident, and threatening to involve my attorney (which I did not have) if they ever directly contacted me about it again. And again, I got an apology and saved myself a crazy amount of money.
If you are getting ripped off (or sense you are about to be), you want to ask yourself two things:
1. Can I indisputably prove that I said/did this? That they said/did this? When?
2. What rights do I have under the law? (For a lot of issues, googling “can X legally do Y” + your jurisdiction is a good place to start.)
And then, if you’re in the right, bluff. Act like you’re going to sue even if you know you don’t have the time or resources to do it. They don’t know you won’t, and even if they think they’d win, they know that would cost them more in attorney’s fees than just letting this go.
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