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the sad thing is, everyone thinks they’re so forgettable, or they don’t mean anything to anyone. but you don’t see your high school friend, smiling to themselves, when they think about your quirks or how dramatic you used to be whenever you got a crush. you don’t see the person who saw you around a lot but was always too shy to talk to you. you don’t remember the person you helped, and maybe you didn’t do much for them, but you didn’t know that they were having a shitty month and you sparked their first real smile in weeks. you don’t see the person that secretly loved you too, who never forgot the soft words that you said, or the way you smiled whenever you saw them, or how you reminded them of sunshine and flowers; and how the thought of you pops into their mind more than you will ever know and in the randomest of places. you will never know that a soft song or strawberries or a sunset will remind someone of you. they will go to the beach and think of you for some reason, until they remember that the last time they saw a color as beautiful and as profound as the ocean was when they looked in your eyes. no one knows their impact on people, or their worth. no one thinks they will be missed when they leave, but they don’t know that once you go into someone’s life, even for a fleeting moment, you stay forever, and you take up a soft place that no one else could ever replace.

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But I loved you. I loved you with all of my heart. And just because you left does not mean that this love stops. Because it don’t. Not even for a second. Even if people think I’m crazy. And even if nobody can understand. It just don’t stop.

Meins.

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A little

Today 

I realized

I might love you

just a little. 

- C. February 18th, 2018

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Awe/some

Some

of my

awe

was absorbed

into you.

- C. February 20th, 2018

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Scream Crying

I didn’t know

scream crying

was humanly possible

until you.

- C. February 20th, 2018

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Exist

I think 

the most

heartbreaking thing

is realizing 

that the person

I fell in love with 

doesn’t exist anymore. 

- C. February 26th, 2018

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No Contact

Break your hand

before you dial his number. 

- C. January 31st, 2018. 

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Did you know,  you can quit your job,  you can leave university?  You aren’t legally required to have a degree,  it’s a social pressure and expectation, not the law,  and no one is holding a gun to your head.  You can sell your house,  you can give up your apartment,  you can even sell your vehicle,  and your things that are mostly unnecessary.  You can see the world on a minimum wage salary,  despite the persisting myth, you do not need a high paying job.  You can leave your friends  (if they’re true friends they’ll forgive you, and you’ll still be friends)  and make new ones on the road.  You can leave your family.  You can depart from your hometown,  your country, your culture, and everything you know.  You can sacrifice.  You can give up your $5.00 a cup morning coffee,  you can give up air conditioning,  frequent consumption of new products.  You can give up eating out at restaurants  and prepare affordable meals at home,  and eat the leftovers too,  instead of throwing them away.  You can give up cable TV,  Internet even.  This list is endless.  You can sacrifice climbing up in the hierarchy of careers.  You can buck tradition and others’ expectations of you.  You can triumph over your fears,  by conquering your mind.  You can take risks.  And most of all,  you can travel.  You just don’t want it enough.  You want a degree or a well-paying job or to stay in your comfort zone more.  This is fine, if it’s what your heart desires most,  but please don’t envy me and tell me you can’t travel.  You’re not in a famine, in a desert, in a third world country,  with five malnourished children to feed.  You probably live in a first world country.  You have a roof over your head,  and food on your plate.  You probably own luxuries like a cellphone and a computer.  You can afford the $3.00 a night guest houses of India,  the $0.10 fresh baked breakfasts of Morocco,  because if you can afford to live in a first world country,  you can certainly afford to travel in third world countries,  you can probably even afford to travel in a first world country.  So please say to me,  “I want to travel, but other things are more important to me and I’m putting them first”,  not, “I’m dying to travel, but I can’t”,  because I have yet to have someone say they can’t, who truly can’t.  You can, however, only live once, and for me,  the enrichment of the soul that comes from seeing the world  is worth more than a degree that could bring me in a bigger paycheck,  or material wealth, or pleasing society.  Of course, you must choose for yourself, follow your heart’s truest desires,  but know that you can travel,  you’re only making excuses for why you can’t.  And if it makes any difference,  I have never met anyone who has quit their job,  left school, given up their life at home, to see the world, and regretted it.  None.  Only people who have grown old and regretted never traveling,  who have regretted focusing too much on money and superficial success,  who have realized too late that there is so much more to living than this.

— Susanna-Cole King

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This will always be my favorite time of the day. Those short hours in the morning when everyone is asleep and you feel like you’re not really existing. But for now, there are so many people, wide awake. They want to know what you are doing. Endless noise. And I would like to sleep.

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our story got going little by little then all at once. as soon as i met you, I just knew it was your lonely soul that got me. i talk to the moon late at night, he tells me about the sun, and i used to tell him about your jagged nails and soft hands and your hair and your lost eyes, and how they say so much. everything life had to offer became loveable. and as we drove i loved the way you would grip the steering wheel and look at me as you look back at the road. it was as if i could hear your thoughts about me. with time i started to notice your flawed heart. i wish youd’ve known the deal and understood. i used to look at you like you were my entire universe. I had finally felt like I was going in the right direction. there were many moments where I  knew i  was falling but i would tell myself it was too early to tell you, because it was too early for me to tell myself. I was scared and afraid to fall into that ocean of uncertainty. Baby, i was just afraid to fail you. now I understand that I cannot expect someone to love me if I do not allow them to.  when you left it felt as if you had taken the sun with you. i felt like i had made a mistake for letting myself fall for you. you have belittled me to a mere moment of the past. its past three and the past couple of nights have been sleepless. they’ve felt so cold and lonely. and the mornings. its only after that first second when I am still half asleep and see the sun shining through my window and onto my bed sheets that it starts all over again. I don’t understand how all im able to do is listen to the songs we used to listen to. and just for a moment, I wish I could go back to that time where it felt as if a lifetime of memories were in our reach. they keep telling me people are not meant to stick around for long, only for as long as they’re supposed to. And this makes me feel  better about the fact that i didn’t try harder to make you stay. Sorry you couldn’t find all you wanted in me. Its weird how even long after you left,  I stayed comitted. Why would I do such a thing? I couldn’t lift my eyes to meet eyes with someone else because it felt too much like betrayal. neither of us goes back and will soon be building something new with someone else. someone shouldve told me that once you made up your mind to leave me, there was nothing I could do to make you stay. im constantly trying to hate you. telling myself you were so selfish for leaving me in the cold the way you did. for leaving me when i needed you the most. i wanted at least a genuine piece of you if i couldn’t have all of you. But I don’t want to judge whats in your heart.  i think im in love with a ghost

right now, you don’t understand and i hope one day you do

massively charismatic

?��t9

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the powerpuff girls lockscreen reblog or like if u save it

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thank you for ruining my life