cgjokes

[cgjokes]

Phong and Blinn walk into a bar… The bartender takes one look at them and says: “I’m not serving you guys, you’re already lit!”

-- submitted by Gregor Punchatz

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Who is the least shiny actor in Hollywood? - Christopher Lambert

http://ididntknowit-blog.tumblr.com/

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How many times can a stereographer look at a strong laser? ....Once.

Alan

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What’s a pirate’s favourite rendering codec? EX-ARRRRRR!

The Brewery VFX

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Did you hear of the movie about an animator who kept losing track of his characters? It was called "Lost In Translation".

Dave Thomlison

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The comper asked, "is the RGB pass ready?" —"Yes, it's also greeny and bluey", I replied.

(-- Dave Thomlison)

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What do you get if you drop a grenade down a rabbit hole? SSS

- Pooby

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What does a particle say to his tail ? -“Strand by me”

- Olivier Jeannel

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There is no Adaptive Threshold parameter… just a bunch of rays Chuck Norris allows to live…

- Tim Crowson

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Why did the CG artist get kicked out of the casino? He knows exactly how the dice are rigged.

Jonathan Kirby

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Why did the graphics card try to get the girl's number? It wanted to texture.

Jonathan Kirby

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Q. How many producers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Don't get all technical on me.

-Geoff

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Q: What actor is this? proc Guitar($guitar) { print $guitar; } A: Mel Gibson

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What is Andy Serkis' favorite coffee? ...a "mocapuccino".

Alan

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My fiance's name is Maya. Shes a model who acts,though shes a little stiff in her movements.shes got a hot box, has smooth skin, and she renders me speechless. while on her way to a script reading one day, she almost crashed.. luckily, i saved her. shes a bit primitive, and sometimes i think shes hollow inside, but when the light hits her face at the right angle, you can see her true colors; shes just skin and bones like everyone else, looking to work her way on to the big screen.

Alex

[cgjokes]

I really wanna learn Houdini but I am scared of all the sidefxs!!

Cris

[cgjokes]

I'm writing a script for doing face mocap, and it seems that my coordinates for the nose have some strong opinions. The x coordinate is prudish ('nosex') and the y coordinate is annoying ('nosey'). Interesting...

Alastair Macleod