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deadass had to try and hunt a lady down for 20 minutes and turn into a karen?? i just wanted to buy some tampons jeez, sorry for my inconvenience of being a c u s t o m e r

I swear every time I go to cvs I have to hunt down people to check me out??

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I swear every time I go to cvs I have to hunt down people to check me out??

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nothing like feeling absolutely numb and painfully bored, but also unable to concentrate on anything i need to do because nothing is interesting anymore and procrastinating until i have immense anxiety so i force myself to do what i need to do and have more anxiety because whatever i did do was terribly done.

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her hair and lips change to the color of your blog

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i’m tired of feeling like i’m not myself. i’m tired of feeling like a shell of a person or not feeling like anything at all. i don’t enjoy anything anymore. i barely feel anything anymore. i’m lucky when i cry because my ears burn and my nose burns and my throat burns and it all hurts.

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I love denying myself fun experiences because I’m too ugly to go outside

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I feel like an absolute failure for going back to something like this.

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Sometimes I say self loathing things to my therapist and he looks at me dead in the eyes before saying “You fucking moron.” and tbh same

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9/9/19

I honestly just want to use this account to vent. I don’t want to talk to people I know in real life about anything. I feel like a bother, I feel annoying, and I’m not going to put myself through what I had before just to be able to call someone a “friend”. I’m hurting enough as it is right now, I really don’t need any help with that.

I cannot stop blaming myself for what happened with him. I should have given him my number or something so if he needed to talk to anyone, I could have been there for him. I could have helped him. I was so selfish, I was only thinking of myself when my boyfriend was leaving, I never stopped to think about what M was going through. I never asked him how he was. I never talked to him about anything. He seemed so fucking happy and fine and never acted like anything was fucking wrong.

Then he goes and does what he did. I don’t even know what to think anymore. It’s been almost two weeks since it happened and nothing feels real anymore. When I see it on the news, in papers, wherever, my skin crawls. I knew him, I knew him and that wasn’t him. His eyes were so blank and in the second picture he didn’t even look like he knew where he was.

I can’t stop with the guilt. My heart feels like a cinder block. And the guilt just weighs in on my stomach and I feel so sick. I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop crying and blaming myself for it. I just want it all to stop. I want the anxiety to stop. I want to feel okay again. I was doing so good, and now I can’t get in my car without crying because I’m alone and I know no one is watching. When I’m alone, I cry about it. I sob. I heave and I can’t fucking breathe when I cry about it because I know if I would have gone with my gut, if I would have just asked him if anything was wrong, none of this would have happened.

He would have maybe gotten the help he needed. He would have talked to someone who could somewhat understand what he was going through. He could have had anyone, someone, to just fucking talk to. I left him alone like that, I didn’t even consider his feelings because I was so caught up in mine and my selfishness cost four lives. It wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t fucking worth it and I would give anything to go back and change it. I would have talked to him. I would have begged him to tell me if something was wrong, if he was okay, if he felt alone. Anything.

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Handmaids Tale S3E6-9

So, a lot has happened? I’ve been really busy, so I haven’t been able to keep up with the Handmaid’s tale too much, but today I was able to finish the episodes I had missed.

I stopped on episode 6 just because the show got really slow, I started to get quite uninterested. That was until I actually continued the episode and was introduced to the “rings”. I don’t know it if it was E6 or E7, but I believe it was E6.

I was confused about the rings at first, like why did Ofgeorge have them? Were they removable? Did they care about her health, like dental health, or if she needed to eat, or even choking or whatever. I realized the Handmaid’s health has never really mattered. There are children everywhere, and although it’s probably not at the same rate it was before, but there are still many, many children.

The rings, in my opinion, are about keeping the Handmaid’s silent about what’s going on around them with the Commanders and the Commander’s wives. There was Commander WInslow with Commander Waterford who was obviously trying to flirt with him. There was his wife telling Serena she enjoyed her book, although they’re no longer allowed to read. I’m sure there’s more stuff going on, and they want to make sure the Handmaid’s don’t spill it. Something I don’t understand about it though is what about the Marthas?

Then there was when June went to the school with Commander Lawrence’s wife. I’m confused as to what she was expecting and how she thought things were going to work out. Children are supposedly so precious to Gilead, and she thought she’d be able to just waltz in and out, claiming the wife was told she was promised a tour of the school, when she wasn’t. I also believe June is beginning to work selfishly. She endangered Commander Lawrenece’s wife, as she became confused, she spoke about seeing the children, and only seeing the children. Although she didn’t get a Martha killed, her walking partner did, if she wouldn’t have spoken and pushed the Martha to keep her involved, she would have been alive.

June’s walking partner, Ofmatthew, deserved what she got entirely. She got someone killed and claimed she was helping June. She was the reason Hannah (Agnes) was relocated, and she is the reason that if June makes it out of Gilead, she most likely won’t have Hannah with her.

Serena has completely turned against June, and I don’t understand what’s changed. She wanted Nichole safe, but she wants her in Gilead? She’s 180-ed, and it’s ridiculous. I was starting to like her, and then she pulls what she did.

I don’t know how or why Canada would send Nichole back to Gilead, and I might have missed bits and pieces of the episode where they put Emily and Moira in jail, but that is also ridiculous. They did what they had to do in Gilead, especially considering what they were put through.

And now, I wanna talk about Ofmatthew snapping. At the birth of whatever Handmaid it was, she was pushed around, glared at, had her water spit in, etc, etc, etc. Aunt Lydia wasn’t blind and knew June was behind it. Ofmatthew ended up snapping in the store, attacking Ofwaren with a can in the face, attacking someone else and stealing their gun. She aimed it between Aunt Lydia and June. I don’t know what exactly happened to her, whether she was shot or what, which is what I believe happened. Watching her face crinkle as she sweated and cried while waving the gun around was just insane.

But then came the time when June began to break. She was isolated with Ofmatthew who basically became a brain-dead incubator until the child was born. She sat there day in and day out “praying” for her and her baby, rarely seeing people, and almost never having real human interaction. She even goes as far as to attack Serena and having homicidal plans. I don’t know what happened at the end of the last episode to make her want to go back, but something tells me she may have either seen someone she knew, or she saw Hannah (Agnes). I doubt the last one, it may be something different altogether, but watching her decision change after seeing those girls in a line walking into the building makes me think that could have been what it was.

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some of y'all didnt grow up as the person nobody has a crush on and it really shows

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reblog this with how many people youve kissed in the tags

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so i recently rewatched twilight, and i’m just. bella really went into the ballet studio to confront james, the tracker, a literal vampire, by herself, and before she goes in she shakes a can of pepper spray?? and continues??

*literally has a vampire tracking her down to kill her*

*confronts him alone, with pepper spray* “ah yes, this is adequate for my protection” like honey what??

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Edward: so now that I’m marrying Bella I’m finally going to be able to enjoy a night with her but I’m a little confused on what to do :/

Emmett who’s had a presentation prepared since the 1940s:

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emmett is fluent in spanish because he wanted to learn how to sing despacito correctly

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Anyone who believes “Animals tell no lies,” has not lived with a cat who wants to convince you that he hasn’t already eaten dinner.

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o h my god the precious “really?” when he pulls his hands to his chest!! ah!!

Daughter tells her Dad he’s going to be a Grandpa [x]