chainslikecrowns

[chainslikecrowns]

On my way home from work tonight I saw a white tail doe with five fawns of varying ages. Ma’am. Those are not all yours.

[chainslikecrowns]

I feel bad for people who’ve never experienced a corn maze bc it’s not even fun but you just have to do it

[chainslikecrowns]

video games are big fans of *grunt of pain* as a token “hey bitch ur getting injured be careful” cue but i think there should be like, a 1 in a 1000 chance for the pc to scream “FUCK” really loud after taking damage 

[chainslikecrowns]

I'm high as fuck at medieval times and trying so hard to look normal. My friend pointed at a QR code and went "What is the meaning of this Rune..." and I almost threw up trying not to laugh

[chainslikecrowns]

[chainslikecrowns]

learning that 1. there's a thing called the 'gen z stare' 2. it pisses people off and 3. it's just underpaid service workers staring at someone until they follow a simple instruction, has been interesting.

for example, the card reader says 'remove card' the customer goes 'it says remove card, what do i do?' then some underpaid 20 year old just stares at whatever twat just asked that question. apparently that's devastating for baby boomers and gen x'ers, and they're complaining about it. retail workers should be allowed to jump the counter and kill customers

[chainslikecrowns]

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

[chainslikecrowns]

it’s necessary to fight back against adult content bans obviously because it leads to queer bans, but also, you cannot forget that we must fight back against these bans because adults have the right to make and enjoy adult content. no credit card company has the right to censor what we look at. yes, this includes the “problematic kinks” and stuff you think is gross and bad. just as we deserve to be openly queer online, we deserve to enjoy adult content without fear of total censorship, and it’s absurd how few places there are to do that online nowadays

[chainslikecrowns]

i’d like to draw everyone’s attention to this portrait of a dog that’s in bella swans bedroom

[chainslikecrowns]

u heard him ladies

[chainslikecrowns]

Y'all notice they don't make ocean spray commercials anymore. Ain't seen those two white men in the cranberry pit in a long time. The bog spiders musta got them.

[chainslikecrowns]

[chainslikecrowns]

[chainslikecrowns]

put those awesome boobs away dude now isn't the time

[chainslikecrowns]

God the 11 year old girls you put on this earth to climb trees and play with plastic animals are buying foundation at the drug store

[chainslikecrowns]

The main character of the last TV show you watched is now your therapist. How’s it working for you?