chefskissbby

[chefskissbby]

Learning/Growing

Hello again to whoever (might be no one, for all I know. HAHAHA) may be reading this!!! Wow, finally the torturous semester has ended and we actually have time to breathe!!!!! Year 1 of MCM was… an adventure? A learning experience, for sure (I mean obviously, we’re here to obtain an EDUCATION). I realised many things. To quote @kingkyliejenner (a few years late, but…),

I learnt so much, not just in the academic context, but about myself as well. The point of this post is about one of the many things I realised over the course of the past year.

With reference to the infamous quote by dear Kylie — I, too, like many others, thought this a vapid and dumb statement made by an equally asinine airhead (which I now know she isn’t, because the woman obviously knows how to capitalise on her fame and family name — case in point, Kylie Cosmetics). Surprisingly, this ostensibly silly quote that brought about a myriad of memes, was what I found myself thinking of throughout 2017, whenever I would “realise” something. Maybe I’m more of a bimbo than I thought, for having this sentiment, but really — this “realising things” quote speaks nothing but the truth and one I found so relatable and undeserving of the ridicule it actually received.

And the thing I realised is: I care too much of others’ opinions of me. To be more specific, whether their opinions are positive or negative. But because there are so many aspects of myself in which I care about others’ perception of me, I shall focus on one of the most important (to me, at least. You’re probably going to laugh when you read on… like, where are my priorities, right?) one — my looks. Or rather, how I appear, on Instagram. As of now — or since whenever I started using Instagram, leading up to present time — I’ve only posted pictures in which I looked good (or decent, at least). For birthday dedications (when I do post one), I’d rather just post a picture of my friend if I don’t look good in our picture together, because I believe that posting a picture for him/her in which I look good and they don’t is quite mean and dumb since it’s their birthday. (Although I think “bday dedis” are stupid in general. It is a dumb social obligation that is in no way indicative of one’s relationship with the birthday girl/boy, if they do/don’t post a “dedi” for him/her hahaha) But I digress.

Many a time, I decided against posting photographs from an occasion or event that I really enjoyed and wanted to commemorate on social media because, um. Some moments you don’t want to just immortalise in photographs, but also on social media? IDK LOL. But I didn’t do up a post, because… well, just because I didn’t look good in the pictures. And it was Instagram. Where, societal norms have stealthily ingrained in our young, impressionable minds that we have to look good all the time. And us, naive, self-conscious fools (not that it’s stupid to have insecurities), having internalised this unspoken rule, abided by it faithfully. Or at least I did. Case in point, as aforementioned, earlier in the paragraph.

It’s not just the pressure of looking your best all the time, though. It’s also all the comments of appraisal one would receive whenever he or she posts pictures in which they look fabulous. Don’t get me wrong though, such comments are absolutely pleasant and welcome. (And I’ve been on the receiving end of many, which I am very much flattered by and thankful for!!!!! Y’all are kind people <3)

Why is that??? :-/ Up until my most recent post, I found the alternative — putting up pictures in which one did not look their absolute best — unthinkable. Before posting that, I sent it to my best friend (as I’ve always done), for advice/approval (yes, as dumb as that sounds. I mean, idk. Is it??? I don’t think I’m the only one who does this right….). She wasn’t really keen on how my face looked.. and I agreed. But I went on to post it anyway, because I really liked how my hair and legs looked in it. LOLOLOL. 

Also, said friend — whose identity is fairly obvious to those who know me well but shall remain anonymous anyway (as will all my friends who may or may not be mentioned in future posts because who knows what will happen to this blog? Whether it will take off or flop… it will remain on the Internet forever regardless and everyone knows the Internet, even with all its boons, is a scary place nonetheless. So) — is one of my biggest supporters ever and I love her so much but I really liked that picture so much I went on to ignore her advice which I’ve previously, steadfastly taken and followed, and posted it hahaha. All this while.. I dared not post any picture that she didn’t really think was nice because like I said, she’s my best friend and one of my biggest supporters ever. If even she doesn’t like it.. needless to say, neither will my followers, right? 

It was then, that I got an epiphany. Perhaps a really superficial one, to most of you. But to someone who really cares how she comes off to others (sad, but true), it was a life-changing one. HAHAHA. And it was that I should just post whatever I want, since it’s MY Instagram. Although that’s not to say I’ll start posting nonsense like selfies of me on the throne, or a blurry picture that I took just so I could rant about the rude stranger I bumped into IRL (as I am wont to do, on my other account). But just that I’ll start posting pictures of occasions/people worth commemorating/immortalising on social media. Hopefully, I’ll get better at this aspect of my life (caring what others think) (not that it’s BAD, per se, especially when it comes to stuff like academic matters because it’s always good to receive constructive criticism!!! From educators and peers and whatnot) with age, as with other things!!!

So… yeah. That’s my great big enlightenment. HAHAHAHA. OK lah not really, it’s just something I’ve been thinking about for a while now. Take it as you will!!! This post is by no means a PSA/preaching/my telling you what to think or do. It’s really my reflecting on how I’ve been dumb when it comes to my social media presence, and how I want to improve as an individual!!!!

Till the next time~~

[chefskissbby]

My Thoughts on “The Greatest Showman”

Hello. Welcome to my blog :o)

So… I’ve been wanting to start a blog (one that I would actually keep up) for the longest time, and since I felt so strongly about this movie that I recently saw, The Greatest Showman, I decided to write a piece on it and while I’m at it, start my blog with it too. It isn’t the best or most positive or neutral, as introductory posts go — but well, here and now’s as good a time and place as any to share my thoughts about the movie as well as start this blog I’ve been putting off for a while! Without further ado, let’s get into the post. (Oh, there are gonna be spoilers. You have been warned)

First of all, (even though they weren’t the main point of the movie) Anne Wheeler and Phillip Carlyle’s love story. Horribly underdeveloped. They barely share any moments together before their first display of affection (spoiler alert: their holding hands scene) — the only moments we got were that eye contact between Anne and Phillip when they first meet, and then after when Phillip assures her that if the Queen doesn’t intend to invite everyone from the circus to visit the Palace, then none of them would deign to accept said invitation. That was indeed a very sweet gesture on Phillip’s part, but that was all we got of their “love story”??? Weelll. I, a sucker for romance, won’t settle for just that. I need MORE to convince me of their budding romance.

Also, how did Anne Wheeler suddenly become one of the more prominent characters despite being just one of the circus acts? Surely, it’s not just because of the aforementioned totally random love line with one of the main characters, Phillip Carlyle? I have a feeling that it’s because she was portrayed by Zendaya… and while I love Zendaya, I just don’t think that her character would have been afforded the scenes and lines and freakin’ love story with a more prominent character were it to have been played by say, a less popular female actress.

Next, on to the main character of the movie — Mister P. T. Barnum! Let me just say right now that I think he is an ASSHOLE (for lack of a better, all-encompassing word). Someone said he could have been thought to be “a celebrant of humanity”? Um. I beg to differ. His sole purpose, right from the very start, was to make money. And I know, who doesn’t want to earn money, right? Especially since he has well and noble intentions — to give his wife, Charity, the life of grandeur he promised her. However, he wasn’t actually celebrating the lives of those ‘freaks of nature’ he chose to showcase — he really merely thought of them as just that and that they would help him attract crowds (even though he said otherwise. But that’s just what I thought) and hence dollars and bucks! He was capitalising on their physical abnormalities. So what if in the process, he inadvertently gave them a family or a home? I don’t really think that sounds like something an actual “celebrant of humanity” would do, idk.

Also, was it just me or was his rudeness towards Charity’s parents — his freakin’ elders, not to mention, in-laws — totally uncalled for? I mean, yes, Charity’s father was/is super horrible to Barnum but like… he could have gone about showing off his newfound wealth and success a different way? I absolutely hated that man when he slapped young P. T., but I kind of feel like he should have spared him the embarrassment in front of his many guests (especially Jenny Lind, who I felt like he was trying to impress with his “manliness”/“authority” in the family lmao) or at least spared a thought for Charity’s feelings omG? That’s her father he’s embarrassing… ack.

Ok on to Jenny freakin’ Lind. Where do I even begin with her ! : - ) As a (sort of? I mean, she tried. LOL) home-wrecker, I think it’s safe to assume she’s the main protagonist, right? Or at least one of them. There were probably a few others considering how much was going on in the entire plot lol. Firstly, what was up with P. T. suddenly managing her and stuff? He’s a freakin’ circus ringmaster. A singer and a circus ringmaster. Quite different and separate lines of occupation, I believe. So that part of the storyline didn’t really make sense. And the writers didn’t do too good a job with this villain’s backstory… y’know — the one that humanizes them, or gives reason to their nefarious causes. All they offered us was how she felt empty in spite of all the applause and commendation she receives. Why exactly does she feel so empty? The world may never know. Also, don’t know if it’s just me but I feel like Barnum must have showed signs of liking her, and that’s why she dared to try and make a move on him. When she first sang on the stage he provided her.. the look on his face said it all, man. Although he ultimately rejected her advances, I feel like he’s kind of already committed infidelity, emotionally. :/ And I hated how Charity was upset with him over this matter right, but he just sings to her and all is fine LOL. I mean, I get that this is a musical film but um… how????

Speaking of people who should have been and stayed angry at Barnum, can I just say I found it so weird that the people from the circus weren’t that pissed at Barnum for turning them away during the party? And then they go on to sing “This is Me”, and still perform for his circus??? Ok so Barnum said something about the audience not being willing to pay money to see them at the circus if they can see them for free at the ball or whatever that he was hosting. Instead of getting mad at Barnum and his moneyfaced-self for saying what he did, they focus on what he said in relation to their status in life due to having been born ‘freaks of nature’. And go on to crash the party while performing “This is Me” hella badass-ly, as a big F U to all da haters lolol. But then again… I suppose it would have been really typical for them to have gotten angry and be added to the list of people Barnum has offended and has to apologize to (which, even if they did, I don’t think they would have been given a very satisfactory apology because somehow Barnum just doesn’t come off as a very apologetic dude).

While I’m on the topic of the circus acts, I just want to ask: WHAT’S UP WITH THE PROTESTORS. LIKE SERIOUSLY. WASN’T THEIR RINGLEADER THE SAME DUDE WHO SAID TO BARNUM, WHEN HE FIRST SET OUT TO LOOK FOR ‘FREAKS’ TO JOIN HIS CIRCUS, “Ya lookin’ for freaks? I know where you can find them.” (Or something along those lines)? SERIOUSLY. If he was so against these ‘freaks’, why help someone who was gonna showcase them to the world find them in the first place????? Omg. These lame protestors were kind of unnecessary and were merely adding to the chaotic storyline till they finally proved their worth by driving the plot forward towards the end with their stupid rioting lol.

To conclude (wow, I had a lot more to say than I thought I did. LOL), I guess the overarching problem with the movie was that there was a lot going on. It’s always good when a movie or book or whatever surprises its audience/readers with a good plot twist but that’s what The Greatest Showman failed to do, in my opinion. All in all, I thought the cinematography was really good and the soundtrack is a m a z i n g. I love, love, love it. So I’m not a total h8er. HAHAHAHA. Although I do feel certain cast members’ acting left much to be desired..

(Also, I missed part of the movie — I think it was after Anne and Phillip’s “Rewrite the Stars” scene? and before Charity stopped singing “Tightrope”? — because I had to go pee LMAO. And I couldn’t even listen to what I was missing visually because there was freakin’ Chinese New Year songs playing in the in-theater toilet….. -__- Maybe I missed out some stuff that were essential to the plot, that would have maybe changed my mind about the movie? But idk my friend whom I caught the movie with said I didn’t, so..! He hated it too btw. HAHAHAHA)

Till next time!!!

SIGNING OFF, 

J