cloudedthinker

[cloudedthinker]

Lately..

This shit done been too much lately.

Lately, shit it's been driving me crazy.

Crazy, lately I been over motivated.

Motivated, but lately my mind been feeling lazy.

Lazy and hazy, why my mind feel like maybe....

Maybe I just been strong for too long.

Too long, I turnt my heart from cotton to a cold stone.

Cold stone, and lately I been tryna find my way home.

Home, damn I ont even remember where that is...

This shit been too much lately...

Daily missing Dudda shit is driving me crazy.

Shits crazy.

[cloudedthinker]

"Remember we said we wouldn't let these bitches get in between us? So when I felt like you was jealous I just wouldn't believe it; and when niggas told me you was fuckin'...I just couldn't believe it."

[cloudedthinker]

Missing my daddy badly made me turn my back on my whole family.

[cloudedthinker]

he's been abandoned his whole life.

If loving me is hard I apologize.

[cloudedthinker]

Once again I'm here. Am I cursed since birth not too feel love?

[cloudedthinker]

S Y R. Up. That's my car yup. Vrooooom skrrrt, I'm gone 💨✌🏽

[cloudedthinker]

Rule Numero Uno:

never share your trauma.

REASONING:

They expect you to respect theirs as they constantly disregard yours.

[cloudedthinker]

This country treats immigrants and their families horribly, but that doesn’t have to stop anyone from applying for college.

[cloudedthinker]

Untitled 1.

Back 2 the basics nigga face it.

Now tell me you wanna be rich or famous?

You wanna be paid or faceless?

Comfortable or brainless?

The chains and whips on some slave shit?

Really gon disrespect ya ppl on them slave ships?

You ont see the State of the Union is dem slave ships?

You ont see we still fighting to be free?

U thought tht ended w that slave shit?

back2dabasics niggas face it.

Now tell me, what it mean to be famous?

Tell me, what it mean to rich?

Tell me is them dollars really worth them chains in the pen?

back2dabasics my nigga face it.

integration was the downfall of our nation.

no I'm not racist.

it just seems 2 me that certain races would rather see Us brainless.

Figuratively and in the literal sense.

The schools in the hood dilapidated.

& Lil Malcolm daddy face down on the pavement..

That's painted crimson from his life force.

Now who supposed to pass Malc his life's torch?

back2dabasics brother face it.

We never really stepped foot off them slave ships

Bc we was never on em, America is where we enslaved at.

So let's get back2dabasics.

LITERALLY

[cloudedthinker]

GOD

show me the way, cause I'm losing grip; and I ain't tryna end up on the same path from my previous slips. Tomorrow Dudda big day, I cant believe this shit; not that he finna make 3, but that I cant see em nd shit. so GOD show me the way before this grip loosens all the way or fast forward to the day I'll be able to wake up and hear my Dudda play. Back to the wall now ashy knuckles, GOD, uk how I get in te struggle, get in my ruffles and ride out, feel like if I ride now it's like I'm hiding out nd I be damned if a mf ever tell my son his Daddy ain't have a care about him. Dudda I'd never give up on you.

[cloudedthinker]

God walk wit me.

and shit I know I'm asking a lot but when these nights get long and my days seem dark..God I need you to talk w me. Been feeling rage these days and quite frankly, I ont like it. so God, I need you to walk w me, and when I cant walk nomo, God, I need you to be my crutch, i wont use you as that for long just until I muster up enough to keep it pushin'. God I know that me and you lost touch, not on a spiritual level, I'm talking physical and such; and I know you ain't leave me....I mustve strayed from yo path, and as I'm tryna find my way back, im witnessing yo wrath, so God again I ask that you walk w me; through these rough days, when my thoughts get dark....God please continue to talk wit me.

[cloudedthinker]

Sleep.

we lost touch a few years back. You visit me err once in a blue moon for a few hours, and it's always uncomfortable for us both so I understand; and whenever u come around when u leave , I end up w this lump in my throat, tears form they fall; then I smoke til I choke. Smoke til I'm smoke, shit I'm starting to think I smoke just to smoke. Tryna quiet my mind and numb my soul, counting puffs like the goats...or that's sheep you count to go to....what's the verb? we lost touch again, such an elusive word; so until you journey back around it's just...me and my herb.

[cloudedthinker]

Love.

Love....genuine love, something so intangible, yet we yearn to grasp it. that's what life is, the never ending search for...love...I felt it, i lost it....but that's what love is. Something so intangible, fickle, so fragile a word could break it...love, a man made construct bc we dont even know what love truly is....love a chemical imbalance that causes, my brain, the organ that's been doing the thinking since thinking; and my heart, the organ that's sole purpose is to pump blood...so why when I finally grasped...love, I felt it in my chest, and although my brain said run my heart said "Yes."...what really is love?

[cloudedthinker]

[cloudedthinker]

Changing of the Guards. Art by pvtso

[cloudedthinker]

Yo I should just bark on you. Burn yo car on you. Cause I'm too much man to leave a mark on you. Yousa a bird you know that???