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Just saw a post asking how tall people are and now I want to make it a poll. Apologies to people in the fringe height categories, you do not get specifics.

I had to consult a chart for this

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this is fred, the dot.

fred wants to grow into a beautiful tree, but sadly has no branches

reblog to give fred a branch

i will post fred status updates as he grows

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stationary computers will literally ask for a blowie once in a while to function properly #dusthimoff

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CALLING SANDERS SIDES SMUT AUTHORS!!!!

(this may or may not be related to my previous post LOL)

how many of YOU would be interested in a sanders sides smut fic exchange? (and by smut fic, i mean smutshot)

this hypothetical event currently being crafted would be

A gift exchange-esque event,

Have a 3 month timeframe

3-5 (we'll decide later) prompts submitted per person participating

The ability to claim prompts on a spreadsheet to then write for other people

With a 1k word minimum

it'd be kinda like an nsfw camp cartoon just w/o a point system

this is more of an interest check to see if hypothetically an event like this would actually work, so even if you wont participate in the writing yourself, if you know anyone who will or are willing to share, please tell them so we can determine whether or not this is a viable idea

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You’re telling me this plot has a hole? Is it tight?

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that's... not how it works. you can't guarantee that your work definitely won't squick anyone. what do you think you're saying?

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I was meeting a client at a famous museum’s lounge for lunch (fancy, I know) and had an hour to kill afterwards so I joined the first random docent tour I could find. The woman who took us around was a great-grandmother from the Bronx “back when that was nothing to brag about” and she was doing a talk on alternative mediums within art.

What I thought that meant: telling us about unique sculpture materials and paint mixtures.

What that actually meant: an 84yo woman gingerly holding a beautifully beaded and embroidered dress (apparently from Ukraine and at least 200 years old) and, with tears in her eyes, showing how each individual thread was spun by hand and weaved into place on a cottage floor loom, with bright blue silk embroidery thread and hand-blown beads intricately piercing the work of other labor for days upon days, as the labor of a dozen talented people came together to make something so beautiful for a village girl’s wedding day.

What it also meant: in 1948, a young girl lived in a cramped tenement-like third floor apartment in Manhattan, with a father who had just joined them after not having been allowed to escape through Poland with his pregnant wife nine years earlier. She sits in her father’s lap and watches with wide, quiet eyes as her mother’s deft hands fly across fabric with bright blue silk thread (echoing hands from over a century years earlier). Thread that her mother had salvaged from white embroidery scraps at the tailor’s shop where she worked and spent the last few days carefully dying in the kitchen sink and drying on the roof.

The dress is in the traditional Hungarian fashion and is folded across her mother’s lap: her mother doesn’t had a pattern, but she doesn’t need one to make her daughter’s dress for the fifth grade dance. The dress would end up differing significantly from the pure white, petticoated first communion dresses worn by her daughter’s majority-Catholic classmates, but the young girl would love it all the more for its uniqueness and bright blue thread.

And now, that same young girl (and maybe also the villager from 19th century Ukraine) stands in front of us, trying not to clutch the old fabric too hard as her voice shakes with the emotion of all the love and humanity that is poured into the labor of art. The village girl and the girl in the Bronx were very different people: different centuries, different religions, different ages, and different continents. But the love in the stitches and beads on their dresses was the same. And she tells us that when we look at the labor of art, we don’t just see the work to create that piece - we see the labor of our own creations and the creations of others for us, and the value in something so seemingly frivolous.

But, maybe more importantly, she says that we only admire this piece in a museum because it happened to survive the love of the wearer and those who owned it afterwards, but there have been quite literally billions of small, quiet works of art in billions of small, quiet homes all over the world, for millennia. That your grandmother’s quilt is used as a picnic blanket just as Van Gogh’s works hung in his poor friends’ hallways. That your father’s hand-painted model plane sets are displayed in your parents’ livingroom as Grecian vases are displayed in museums. That your older sister’s engineering drawings in a steady, fine-lined hand are akin to Da Vinci’s scribbles of flying machines.

I don’t think there’s any dramatic conclusions to be drawn from these thoughts - they’ve been echoed by thousands of other people across the centuries. However, if you ever feel bad for spending all of your time sewing, knitting, drawing, building lego sets, or whatever else - especially if you feel like you have to somehow monetize or show off your work online to justify your labor - please know that there’s an 84yo museum docent in the Bronx who would cry simply at the thought of you spending so much effort to quietly create something that’s beautiful to you.

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Guys if there were 2 clone of you or a you from another dimension and they dated and/or had intercourse what would you think about that

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"Who will call you lord

Who will fall on bended knee

Who will lift the sword

And lay down his life for me..."

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regret.mp4

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NEED👏THAT👏MAN👏PREGNANT ROUND 5 POLL 2

PROPAGANDA:

[Megatron]

"Just. Just look at this guy. He's already so big and so mad. He's going to be even more big and even more mad if someone knocks him up and he's going to make it everyone's problem, and he's capable of making himself a big problem for a lot of people. It's the middle of the 5 million year war and the Decepticons are more afraid of 20 tons of cranky warlord with morning sickness than of the enemy. The Autobots don't know what to do. The humans are getting a whole new education. It's a nightmare for everyone. Or it's peacetime and the peace progress and his post-war moral soul-searching just got a whole lot more complicated. Either way, no matter who did it - his deviously treacherous second in command, his loyal and possibly psychic third in command, his life-long Autobot nemesis/ex-boyfriend, his meteor-surfing co-captain, Tarn - there's going to be big drama.

Alternatively, it's Transformers One and he is a precious cinnamon roll who got his heart broken by everyone he trusted and now we can make it worse and make him even sadder!

Alternatively alternatively it's Bayverse and he might already have been knocked up before, we don't know where those hatchlings came from.

Basically what I'm saying is that there are infinite flavors of Pregatron and all of them are peak drama because that's how he rolls. Also you get to call him Pregatron which is always a win."

"He's got birthing hips and a desire to fuel the decepticon cause."

[Grunkle Ford]

"He has that pathetic nerd swag why wouldn't I want him pregnant. I know multiple people who would want to bang that senior citizen."

"okay so this is the most breedable motherfucker in gravity falls. sorry but its true. eldritch chaos god triangle wants him so bad he ended the world about it, genius engineer wanted him so bad it made his wife divorce him, aliens want him, everyone in the town keeps calling him a silver fox and hot, etc. his autistic swag, presumable complete sexual inexperience in his 60s, and whimsy are a recipe for all to feel extreme lust when gazing upon his visage.

reasons that he is so mpreg-able aside, it is actually somewhat plausible that he is currently, as we speak, mpregnant. the new gravity falls book, the book of bill, had a website that was released to promote the book and also relay a bunch of new fun information and arg things. this new book, in universe, is written with the intent to be read by ford, and for the website, it is showcasing ford's laboratory. so one could view all of the material with the perspective of it being directed at ford.

one of these messages on the website is an image of an ultrasound of a baby-- a triangular baby. on it, there is the message "congrats, guess what's growing inside you right now! see you in nine months, papa!"

so…. ford might be mpregnant with his ex, bill ciphers baby. yayyyy."

"He's just so submissive and breedable. he should get a sci fi abortion. he would not enjoy fatherhood."

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I was thinking through what else I’m looking forward to this holiday season and I realized I haven’t mentioned it on here, just on discord, but— MY MOMS BEEN MAKING ME A REALLY COOL ART THING??

I think I’ve talked about it before, but my mom has been a quilter for most of my life and in the last few years started doing these really cool fabric collages, and it was my turn to request one so I asked for a phoenix cause I’m obsessed with this one art piece I did in art therapy ages ago

Anyway, my mom has been working on it and THIS was the last update I got???

I’m so excited for it?? Can’t wait to see where it’s at by the time I get there this weekend

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who likes twincest raise your hands! 🖐

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