commanderwiggin

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I had an idea for D&D

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gays are bad at math because instead of spreading it evenly so all gays are moderately competent at math the talent is heavily concentrated into a chosen few but it takes a long time to recharge The Math Gay Battery which is why Isaac Newton and Jon Lovett were born 300 years apart

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gender reveal came back negative

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Lee, Zak failed basic flight. Or at least he should have, but he didn’t. Because I passed him. His technique was sloppy and he had no feel for flying, but I passed him. Because he and I … Because I felt something and I let it get in the way of me doing my job and I couldn’t fail him.

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It’s true though.

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Can we consider how many people Toph caused internal bleeding and broken bones?

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child handling for the childless nurse

My current job has me working with children, which is kind of a weird shock after years in environments where a “young” patient is 40 years old.  Here’s my impressions so far:

Birth - 1 year: Essentially a small cute animal.  Handle accordingly; gently and affectionately, but relying heavily on the caregivers and with no real expectation of cooperation.

Age 1 - 2: Hates you.  Hates you so much.  You can smile, you can coo, you can attempt to soothe; they hate you anyway, because you’re a stranger and you’re scary and you’re touching them.  There’s no winning this so just get it over with as quickly and non-traumatically as possible.

Age 3 - 5: Nervous around medical things, but possible to soothe.  Easily upset, but also easily distracted from the thing that upset them.  Smartphone cartoons and “who wants a sticker?!!?!?” are key management techniques.

Age 6 - 10: Really cool, actually.  I did not realize kids were this cool.  Around this age they tend to be fairly outgoing, and super curious and eager to learn.  Absolutely do not babytalk; instead, flatter them with how grown-up they are, teach them some Fun Gross Medical Facts, and introduce potentially frightening experiences with “hey, you want to see something really cool?”

Age 11 - 14: Extremely variable.  Can be very childish or very mature, or rapidly switch from one mode to the other.  At this point you can almost treat them as an adult, just… a really sensitive and unpredictable adult.  Do not, under any circumstances, offer stickers.  (But they might grab one out of the bin anyway.)

Age 15 - 18: Basically an adult with severely limited life experience.  Treat as an adult who needs a little extra education with their care.  Keep parents out of the room as much as possible, unless the kid wants them there.  At this point you can go ahead and offer stickers again, because they’ll probably think it’s funny.  And they’ll want one.  Deep down, everyone wants a sticker.

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an array of supremely unsexy happenings

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I used to think i was introverted bc I really liked being alone but it turns out I just like being at peace & I am very extroverted when I’m around people who bring me peace

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I think it is brave and also very sexy of me to continue living

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Cowboys are witches and horses are their familiars

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what is the january mood?