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**Me when Final Fantasy 15 ACTUALLY comes out*** .....Why are you delayed sir?? This is off topic but I had to say this..sooo.. p.s. I'm happy they're spoiling us with some updates. At this point, when the game actually comes out, I hope the boys literally come out of the TV and sit next to me with all these fixes they're doing. Then all is forgiven. :)

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Black & nerdy When I started this I had the idea in mind to speak to other black girls / guys like me. To spread empowerment in the effect of it being perfectly fine to geek out as much as you want. For many years....well from the first time I watched / played anime and video games like this -->( °○°) I knew I was addicted. But the good addiction. I don't want a cure. The common issue I had was that I felt so isolated doing it. I mean, if I let society dictate my obsessions I'd probs be a vocal fry reality TV addict. **To each their own, not bashing** I'm not and never will be. (Although some drama is good...on tv.) Anyway, my lil message to you is to keep being that way. With all these social platforms it makes it SO much easier to get in contact with like-minds. So please don't let others make you feel bad for being the way you are. If some of your family members or 'friends' don't get you / find you completely crazy that you drool over senpai and yell at the TV then oh well. Life is too short to limit your true self. ****I'm gonna touch on this topic for being black & nerdy in high school later on. (Oh Lord is that a trip)

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Being black

Yes I am a black girl with kinky hair. Yes I have wide hips, full lips, and an ass that some women pay for. Yes my skin is full of melanin that glows in the sun. And yes just because I talk differently I still consider myself black. 

In an age where self identity is so important, I feel so much more connected to myself then ever before. When you start to live life unapologetically you it feels so free. 

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(Photo taken by me) Just a little photo I took while on my way home.

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Does size really matter??...In cosplay, of course. So I guess this could be a never ending battle of opinions. Or it could be touchy. Either way I'd like to put my cents in. To me this is pretty cool. Its like saying "hey I don't care what size I am I just love this character! " and thats soooo freakin inspiring. Being into cosplay, one of the coolest things ever is to be around like minded people. To feel embraced and share obsessions. But...there's also a darker side. People not wanting to accept you because you're not 'the right size' for the character. That really saddens me. But that's just the way the world works. Not everyone is going to like what you do. Me personally I celebrate it because the world isn't built on 'one type' and as long as you're being reasonable, it shouldn't matter at all. Soooo... with that being said.. do you boo! Cosplay! And keep going. Whether you're petite or curvy do it. Love your body, love the character, and dress up. It's all about having fun. ❤

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Tick....Tock....Tick.. That's the sound of my internal clock. The one that tells me to hurry before it's too late...the one that puts so much pressure on me. The one that makes me feel like my life should be successful the same way others have. But it's not the case at all. I can't compare my time, my life, and how I reach my goals like everyone else. My life is..just that..MY LIFE. And how I go about it to make myself successful should be done the way its intended. Comparing yourself to others is chaos. The biggest time waster as well as a mental destroyer. After a long talk with my mom, it really set me back to a level head. It made me realize that I am my own person with my own goals, hopes, and dreams and I have to do things fit for me. You are the main character in your book and all others are side characters. You write the pages. Ignore that 'internal clock' and start living life for YOU. 💙

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Love yourself! You're so fab!~° So I've been seeing things on the internet about weight issues. How it's not good to promote empowerment when you're over weight because it's rewarding unhealthy values. But why do we only celebrate empowerment after the fact? Why not cheer on the whole transformation? From beginning to the end, all steps included, we should love ourselves unconditionally. I've struggled with that myself. Not allowing my OWN mind to see myself as beautiful until I saw that magic number on the scale. But that's not fair nor is it a healthy way of life. If you're going through a transformation of getting healthy, stronger, or whatever, just love each step you take. Love the beginning, the middle, and especially the end. Don't waste time thinking that you can only be happy with yourself when you reach the end results. Love all sides of the beautiful you!~

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What cosplay means to me

Sooo..cosplay is a big thing nowadays. I remember when I attended my first convention back in 2009 with a small group of friends. The con wasn't well known like AX or Fanime, but it was still pretty fun.  It was amazing to finally see all these awesome peeps wearing these beautifully crafted costumes. Before that I had only seen cosplayers in pictures. But being in that atmosphere in person was pretty cool. Hmm yeah I ‘cosplayed’...kinda. More like threw on random things and called it an outfit. I was new so I get a pass. xD Anyway, at that moment I really felt like I was a part of a cool community. Sure I wasn't fancy, but I was still there in the crowd. I was about 17 then. And from that moment on I’d been poisoned by it. A good poison that you don't want an antidote to.

Cosplay to me symbolizes freedom, creativity, and passion. You can express yourself just by the character you connect with. Each one has their own personality that we cling onto. Relatable or just plain cute. Whatever it is we still fall in love so much that we are willing to give up our own identity for a day, or longer, just because we connect to them. That's pretty cool. But what if you look nothing like the character. Not as thin as them, or tall as them. Maybe not even the same shade. I've seen this and felt this way before too. When I have conversations with my friends about anime and who they'd cosplay I always hear the same thing. “"I can't because I don't look like them” “I’m not tall enough I can't be her or him.” Now I’m not gonna lie and pretend like I’ve never felt the same way. I have. But I've come to realize that you can't let those things hold you back. You just gotta do it! In life, you can't achieve anything being scared. Take me for instance, I didn't cosplay a character, but I threw on random things.  I’m not tiny, more like curvy. xD I’m also black btw. Probably even looked foolish to some. But I still rocked it. So to end this post before it turns into something 3 million miles long...Just do it. Cosplay. And be the best random outfit or costume wearing person you can be.

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The journey begins...

I wanted to make this blog for a long time. And for the longest I've put it off. Kept saying "maybe later" or "I'm not ready yet". But when will I truly be 'ready'? So I decided on this day to take the plunge and start. I want this to be one of many inspirational things out there that can help people be themselves. I want it to be full of love and advice for others as well as myself. I want it to be something that will make someone say "you know what...I'm ok with who I am and what I love to do. And no one can take that away from me". So come along with me on this journey. Not only with cosplay but with self love and empowerment. I want for everyone, no matter who you are or what you look like to embark on this crazy hobby called Cosplay.