counttearsnotsheep

[counttearsnotsheep]

girl. what was i on.

finally logged back on after so many years and when i reread my posts. i for real wonder wtf was i on HAHAH

dawg it ain't that deep

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stressed-

competition. co-curriculum activities. expectation of others. expectation of self. academia. commitments. I have so much on my plate and I don’t know how to manage this. I only have 24 hours a day, there is so little I can do. Sometimes I wish that we have 48 hours a day. Maybe even if that, I still have work that is incomplete. I like how I am complaining here on Tumblr when I could have used the time I used to type this to do my work. Ahh, there comes my priorities issue but that’s another topic for another time. Who can I blame to be honest? I would only have myself to blame. 

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im so stressed recently. i dont think i can function anymore

KATSUO  -  https://twitter.com/KATSUO_D  -  https://kumano-katsuo.booth.pm/items/710445  -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNnzZ07FnSY  -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxTjf28Gccs  -   http://31style.moo.jp/tukineko_lute

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stop being a dumb weak bitch

yours sincerely, grace’s brain

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grey thoughts

these are not the purest but it isnt the darkest thoughts i have been thinking recently. I just feel like putting it up on the internet. no one read my blog anyways so i guess its for the future me i guess. i have been trying to work on a lot of things but i feel like i am still in square 1. its like been so long. i don’t know, i feel like the me that resides deep in my heart might be asleep forever. I have so much i want to accomplish but i have so little will power and time. sometimes, i wanna just not show up to school for a day and rest at home to complete whatever i need to. eh, this is not even counted as dark thoughts. i just want to leave it up here at least i got it off my chest 

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im gonna fail istg i have so much i wanna do, but so little time 

Lets Live Here

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Moon earrings

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At the point, the only people and animals that I would truly give 2 shits about is puppies, grandparents, Billie and Bob Ross

(source)

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oof

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I want to stab my family members right now 

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darker thoughts

I know suicide should not be something to be taken lightly but not gonna lie. I sometimes thought of killing myself to spite my parents. I want them to be thoroughly sorry for all they have done and I want them to fill 10 times the pain I felt. Or I thought about killing myself and leave a letter saying that I cannot stand my siblings so that they will never be loved. 

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im feeling soft rn uwu

Amante / Melodrama

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seeking comfort-

everyone always ask me what is wrong and gets upset when i reply them with a i don’t know, thinking that i dont trust them. The thing is that i really dont know, its just this sad sad sad feeling that i have. I really wish that they will leave me alone but they never listen. I really don’t know what to do. 

[counttearsnotsheep]

should i start writing poems?

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worry

i worry about a lot of things. Necessary or unnecessary, it was okay at first but worrying on certain topics, topics that i call ‘taboo topics’ really just affects me so much. You maybe think that i could stop right? The thing is that I can’t. I can’t control my thoughts, it’s like as if my thoughts is a whole new being that resides in me. I tend to think about death a lot, and sometimes it gets so bad that i lose all my will to do anything, including eating. Now, when i eat certain food, it brings me back to the time where i worry too much and it makes me want to puke. Help.

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mood

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