crejapasta

[crejapasta]

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[crejapasta]

fgo is a very easy game to understand. you suffer unimaginably and then you listen to The Sun In The Abyss and everything is ok

[crejapasta]

things you DO NOT need to be a man

a dick

he/him pronouns

XY chromosomes

things you DO need to be a man

the swiftness of a coursing river

the force of a great typhoon

the strength of a raging fire

the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon

^this post was brought to you by LGBT^

Let's

Get down to

Business

To defeat the huns

[crejapasta]

I feel like a lot of people don’t quite get what a butler is. The role tends to get rounded off to ‘male servant’ pretty regularly in some media, whereas actually butlers are typically not just servants but chief servants. The butler was generally in charge of either all male servants or just all servants, period, in the household of an aristocrat or other very wealthy person. This meant that butlers have often been fairly powerful and influential people, and sometimes even had a manservant or two of their own.

(Also, fun fact: Mary Roberts Rinehart, the early 20th century mystery writer who is widely credited with popularizing the whole ‘the butler did it’ trope was nearly murdered by one of her own servants, a chef whom she had passed over for promotion to butler. He came at her with a pistol, but it jammed, allowing her chauffeur time to wrestle it away and restrain him.)

[crejapasta]

[crejapasta]

i love the phrase "sex pervert" like. as opposed to what? abstinence pervert?

[crejapasta]

[crejapasta]

i’m dog sitting for rich lesbians

[crejapasta]

i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.

this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.

anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:

[crejapasta]

I have to assume that in the fullness of time, at least once, a mouse has used a mushroom as an umbrella.

That’s enough to keep me going.

[crejapasta]

[crejapasta]

criticism of Labubu I will accept: the blind box format encourages rampant consumerism; some people only buy them because of the trend and they will be landfill fodder in six months when that trend dies

criticism of Labubu I will not accept: hnnnnn adults playing with toys WEIRD and BAD!!!!!

[crejapasta]

behind every late diagnosed neurodivergent person is a parent who has absolutely nothing going on at all don't worry about it

[crejapasta]

Algae

Superman: I’ll fight the algae and win. I’ll fight all these little water plants. They can’t get the best of me.

[crejapasta]

To me in 2016: if youre still on this website, fuck you but i understand

[crejapasta]

If you like the word “queer” reblog.

[crejapasta]