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Today I went for a drive near the beach.
I see this beautiful phenomenon of a human being, scootering around and smoking a joint, enjoying the calming ocean breeze... would've been a peaceful sight if they didn't start SWERVING around in the MIDDLE OF THE ROAD LIKE A MADMAN.
Anyways, that's the story of how I nearly had a panic attack while driving a moving vehicle.
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Went to Walmart today.
Saw a woman wearing a hijab standing in the middle of an aisle talking on the phone. She realizes she needs to push the cart out of the way, so proceeds to stick the phone inside her hijab, and casually pushes cart with both hands whilst maintaining phone call COMPLETELY HANDS FREE!!?!?!?
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