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Our Blog is moving!

If you are looking for our blog head over to www.datemy.co.uk/blog/

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Drunk In Love

To celebrate London Cocktail Week we have devised a list of romantic cocktails available at some of our favourite London Cocktail bars. If you are looking for an aphrodisiac, try one of these!

Love Potion No 9 – London Cocktail Club

An amorous concoction of Bombay Sapphire gin, Spanish desert wine, pineapple and lemon.

Kilner Me Softly – Callooh Callay

Santa Teresa rum served in a wood smoked jar, mixed with a Coca-cola reduction, Fernet Branca and Bitters.

Mile High – Steam & Rye

Pampero rum, Honey syrup, lemon and bubbly.

50 Shades of Wray – Portobello Star

Wray and Nephew, whipped up with sparkling grapefruit soda, a kiss of passionfruit, then spanked with grenadine and finished with a pearl necklace of passion fruit seeds.

Once Loved – The Shop NW10

Kraken dark spiced rum, coco lopez, pineapple juice and crème de abricot (served in a vintage milk bottle).

Passionate Rose – TGIFriday

Havana Club 3 year old rum, Bols Creme de cacao and rose syrup shaken with lime juice, fresh passion fruit and passion fruit puree.

Deja Vieux for Two – Nola

Rye Whiskey married with Courvoisier Exclusif, Sweet Vermouth and Benedictine and a dash of bitters.

Valentino – Hawksmoor

Nikka 15 year old, Chocchi Torino, triple sec, cherry juice and orange bitters.

Harmony Royale – Milk and Honey

Cognac, maraschino, strawberry, lemon

Between the sheets – Artesian

Remy Martin VSOP, Plantation 3 stars, triple sec, lemon.

The Sweetest Sting - The Jam Tree

Appleton Estate VX Jamaican rum, vodka, elderflower cordial and raspberry jam muddled with lime juice and a sprig of mint leaves.

Visit datemy.co.uk and help someone find Love today!

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Looking for Love amongst Mullets, Mime artists and Mischief!

The strangest online dating concepts we have come across!

Dating for people with food allergies. Is it really that much of a problem that you wish to spend the rest of your life with someone who you can connect with through the inability to eat a certain type of food?

One site has split themselves into lots of small ‘passions’ which people identify themselves by and then find others who share the same passion as them. Sounds perfect, except some examples of these 250+ passions include; a site for vampires and vampire lovers, one for people who have mullets or love people who do, and those who dedicate themselves to a life of mime or are attracted to those who do.

While most of us enjoy the odd fancy dress at special occasions such as Halloween there are sites to bring together communities  of people who enjoy dressing up, some examples are people who dress up as furry animals and a site for those who dress up as clowns (for work or personal reasons) . Another networks adults who like to spend their time wearing nappies and dressing up as babies.

A dating site for people who are already in relationships. Obviously some people find this thrilling but to actively join a website which brings together people who are interested and willing to cheat on their significant other, or to be the ‘bit on the side’, seems really bizarre to us. Infidelity should not be encouraged especially to make money. Probably the most famous of this type of site actually allows females to sign up for free, but then for a members profile to be completely removed without a trace, they must pay £15. Sneaky and mischievous, just like their target audience.

Similarly, we also found a site which allows you to upload a photo of yourself and your significant other and then people vote on which of the two of you they think can do better, with the intention of finding someone ‘better’. Ouch.

At datemy.co.uk we encourage and love the diversity of our users. The matchmakers and single people work together to write the users profile which helps to provide an honest and interesting ‘about me’. Why not take a look and see if you can find Love on datemy.co.uk? 

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Tips for writing an online dating profile

Writing an online dating profile about yourself can be a really daunting experience. One of the biggest complaints about online dating is that after a while all the profiles begin to look the same and ultimatley the user gets bored and logs off feeling unsuccessful. So how do you grab their attention and stand out from the crowd without sounding egotistical and self-centred? An online dating profile is short and therefore amplifies anything you write and can become a character statement about you whether you intend it that way or not. You can really benefit from investing some real thought into what to write. These are the top tips we've assembled for writing a profile.

We think a really key idea is getting someone you love to help write it for you. It is not often peole are told what their best qualities so it can be hard to come up with some yourself. There are many qualities your loved ones see in you that you may not know about yourself. At datemy.co.uk the Matchmakers who initially write the profile are personally known by the single people. This helps to build an honest and usually more appealing profile as people find it a lot easier to write about another person than themselves.

It is best to avoid cliches at all costs, dont fall into the trap of thinking that the classic 'one liners' never get old, because they did. Those are the type of things that will not get you noticed by the right people. Having somene help you write your profile can often give you great and original ideas which is undoubtably going to be more interesting to read than 'I love laughing'.

A dating profile is a snapshot - you have a limited amount of time to grab someone's attention. Keep it short because people usually just skim read through the writing sections of a profile. You wouldn't tell a stranger who you met in a bar your whole life story in the first instane so it should be no different online.

Often words used to describe a person are attributes which need to be proven through getting to know you, therefore, using a carefully selected selection of photos can say a lot more about yourself than a whole paragraph about yourself. Choose recent photos which you feel comfortable in and remember you can always get help from a loved on on choosing them.

datemy.co.uk

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Tips for Playing Cupid

So you know two single people, and obviously you think they are just perfect for each other! But how do you go about setting them up? Here are some tips we've picked up from various experts. Find similarities Firstly, work out if they have any common ground. Opposites can and do attract but there should be some commonality. Casually mention each other in conversation so that their names are familiar. Arrange a meeting The next step is to organise where, when and how to get them to meet in person. Do not let them know your match making plans because this adds pressure and nerves will make the whole thing awkward when they do meet. Suggest they both come and meet you and some other friends at a bar where it is busy enough for them to not feel under the spotlight and is a great place for striking up casual conversation. The introduction Introduce each other and mention one or two commonalities they share then allow conversation between them to flow naturally. If it doesn't initially, don't force it, remember you cannot create chemistry or play God and these things take time. Take a step back If and when your plan works and they do hook up or start to take things further, take credit in silence and don't keep pestering them about how it's going. A genuine relationship can take time to form.

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Removing the stigma of online dating one swipe at a time.

             As the number of relationships that have started online increases (it is now the second most common way to meet someone new), has the stereotype of an average online dater being old, desperate and lonely gone?

There is a huge market in online dating and no shortage of specialist sites suiting people with similar interests, hobbies and cultures. The more traditional online dating sites allow you to upload some photos, write an about you, list your favourite hobbies, your height, weight and any other information you decide. And then if the site doesn’t match make for you, you browse through the thousands, narrowing down on the handy side panels and carefully choose some people whose profiles seem attractive to you.  It’s a bit like online window shopping but for a relationship.

Modern apps like Tinder completely cut out the comparably lengthy process and allows you to quickly decide yes or no based on a profile photo, and if you wish to look further; a short sentence or two on their ‘about me’ section. In an age where everything has been shortened with digital technology, this kind of communication has become incredibly popular, but should it really be described as a dating app. Tinder describes themselves as a lifestyle app which acts as a platform for connecting new and interesting people around you. This fast paced system has become popular especially within the younger generation who wish to meet up for casual short term relationships, if not a one night stand. These apps are much more playful and less serious than traditional online dating sites which help to lessen the idea that the user is desperate or seriously looking for a relationship and therefore not associated with the stereotypically older online dater looking for love.

There are plenty of internet pages dedicated to users sharing their experiences using these apps including the funniest, creepiest and cheesiest chat up attempts they’ve encountered which also helps to keep the whole thing a lot more light hearted. It seems to be used as a way for young people to ‘hook up’ rather than find love or anything long-term. Jean-Claude Kaufmann in his book Love Online discusses the change in relationships since the millennium.  Thanks to online dating sites, Kaufmann suggests, "there was now a vast hypermarket for love and/or sex, in which everyone was both a buyer and seller who openly stated what they wanted and tried to satisfy their needs as efficiently as possible.”

Considering by 2030 it has been predicted that 1 in 2 relationships will begin online, so far apps such as Tinder ultimately seem to have helped partly remove the embarrassment of engaging in online dating especially within the younger 20-somethings. For now, although it is generally becoming more socially acceptable, it would only take a few swipes on these apps to realise there is still a slight stigma attached to the idea of online dating as a large number of people have written in their bio: “if anyone asks, we met in a bar”.  

           www.datemy.co.uk

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I always feel guilty if I don’t do a little work every day. If hard work brought you to where you are, then that’s what you have to do twice as hard to stay where you are. The climb isn’t the difficult part; it’s staying.

Joan Rivers. (via papermagazine)

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A picture says a thousand words and first impressions mean everything.

Nowadays thanks to all the social platforms we all have unlimited photos of ourselves. It is well known that having a photo on your profile can dramatically increase interest and first impressions really do mean everything with online dating, so choosing the right photo is make or break.

We asked some online daters for their top cliche pictures of men: 

"The unashamed mirror selfie you took before you went out the other night, pouting, hair gelled to perfection yet not a hint of happiness in your eyes."

"Look at me touching this tiger in Vietnam during my gap year; yes I climbed the Great Wall of China, or how about a photo of me sat in a plastic garden chair about to bungee off an Australian cliff. I’m well-travelled you know."

"Gym/flexing muscles selfie. I, along with other women who may or may not admit it secretly love a topless shot, but lifting up your top to show us your ab-tastic stomach and cutting out your face; major cringe"

"Lying in bed, hinting that you are naked, arm draped effortlessly, yet strategically over your head and giving a subtle seductive smile. Slightly creepy"

"You holding a (really, really cute) child and then writing on your about me ‘the child is a family friend’.  I don’t even know why this one annoys me"

"Standing in a group photo where we can’t tell which one you are or worse, having a better looking in friend the photo with you. Who is he, is he single, may I speak with him instead?"

Please guys, we're happy for you to be well-groomed, travelled, fit, child-friendly and the rest. But as a first impression - a recent shot of you flashing a genuine and comfortable smile is all that is required.

www.datemy.co.uk

#onlinedating #dating #relationships #fails #selfie #profile #cliche 

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Mena Ruparel Guest Blog: Dating after Separation

In my job as a divorce lawyer, I meet a lot of people who have started dating someone new, even though they aren't divorced yet. Most of the time my clients are too shy to mention to me that they are dating. However, I usually get to see their financial details at some point or another and I notice that they are paying subscriptions to dating websites.

In a survey released this week, Aviva have found out that the average person getting divorced spends £1,227 per annum on dating. This isn't surprising to me at all, particularly when compared to the other costs that go hand in hand with building a new life as a single person. The same survey states that £1,483 is spent on new clothes and a further £1,853 on life coaching or therapy. In my view, these costs go hand in hand to build a new, possibly happier, life after divorce. Bearing in mind that legal costs to draw a line under the old relationship are stated to be £1,280, the cost of finding a new relationship seem to be a better investment!

In the Daily Mail, a divorcee spent every penny of her savings on a “Divorce makeover”. She says that she has no regrets at spending £65,000 re-inventing herself. Her costs included a (very reasonable) online dating subscription at £20 per month! As is the case with many new singles, she was also paying babysitters to look after her children, sharing the cost of meals on dates and the cost of pre date hair and make-up. She has no regrets about the money she spent on her makeover.

Mena Ruparel is a Solicitor, Arbitrator and Writer. She writes articles and books on the subject of divorce and relationships www.menaruparel.com.

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Know someone who could do with a nudge towards online dating?

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Wouldn't it be lovely to help someone fall in Love?

Here is how you can give a nudge to someone you know...

datemy.co.uk

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Islington Singletons

Here’s one of our random facts; Islington is the singles capital of Britain. Quite apt as if you jumble all the letters around, as an anagram it spells Singleton - almost.

If you know someone single why not become their datemy Matchmaker? It's free and fun. 

Who will you sign up?

datemy.co.uk

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Get snappy

Want to know how to get your online dating profile to stand out from the crowd?

Here's a shallow (but we all know is very true) statistic - 90% of men and 68% of women make a decision about whether to date somebody based on their photos alone. So although looks isn't everything, you want your photo to get people clicking 'match me' not the Esc key!

Here's Guardian's top 5 tips for choosing winning profile photos.

1. Make them light, bright and clutter free

2. Make them recent

3. Make sure you’re on your own

4. Smile

5. Express your personality (doing something you love or with a prop)

Your datemy Matchmaker can help you pick your best side, just remember profiles which have at least 3 photos get twice as many messages as people with only one photo! Get snappy!

Happy matchmaking

datemy.co.uk

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Joshua Pompey Guest Blog: 3 Things You Need to Know About Emailing Women Online

@JoshuaPompey sheds his expertise on messaging women for the single men out there.

For many men online dating can be a frustrating task. When things are going great, having unlimited potential dates right at your fingertips is nothing short of amazing.  But when things are going bad, the amount of time wasted sending out emails can really add up in a hurry. The goal of online dating should be to form connections, not to feel as if you are working a second job with a terrible payoff. Well here’s the good news. Receiving responses from women online is an easy task once you learn all the little nuances of online dating. But it all begins with giving yourself a proper education. Follow all my rules and I could get your response rate up to at least thirty percent. But first things first. Let’s take a look at three things that that you need to know before sending out that first message online. 1.  Beautiful women are in extreme demand online. Think beautiful woman get hit on a lot at bars? Well in the online world, those same beautiful women will be hit on a rate that shatters anything these women would experience in the “real” world. This is because the same men that fear face-to-face rejection have no fear of hitting on a woman behind the safety net of a computer screen. On any given day you might be competing with 20 to 50 men for the same girl. Does this mean you have no chance online or a better chance of meeting women at a bar? Absolutely not. What it does mean though is that you must be extremely interesting, engaging, and give women a reason to want to write you back. There will be many men to choose from every week. So make yourself into the best choice, which all starts with writing the perfect email. 2.  Women can’t resist men that make them laugh. Men have a number of tools at their disposal to attract women and tend to feel an attraction towards men based on a whole variety of qualities that have absolutely nothing to do with looks, such as confidence, demonstrating alpha male qualities, showing value, etc. It’s one of the huge benefits of being a guy. But of all the tools a man can use to attract a woman online, humour is by far the most superior.  When you make a woman laugh, her interest will immediately start to perk up. If you can carry the laughter from your first email, all the way through to your profile, then you will exponentially increase your chances of a first date eventually being granted. At the end of the day, when a woman is deciding who to go on a date with, she’s most likely going to choose the man that shows the most potential of fun. And humour is what reveals this potential.  3.  Canned emails will instantly be deleted. I know what you're thinking. It’s really hard to come up with something original to write in every single email. I get it. It's rough.  But you know what’s even rougher? Sending out fifty emails and getting rejected by every one of them. And that is exactly what will happen if you email out the same message to fifty women.  The truth is, women can spot these types of canned emails a mile away.  No woman wants to feel as if she is getting hit on by some pick up line.  Women want to feel unique and special. So put in the extra effort and come up with something creative. I promise you, the effort will be worth it when all is said and done.

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Interesting article on a dad's marriage advice for his daughter!

 A Father’s Recipe For The Right Guy

One secret to a happy life: finding the right guy you should date or even marry and this is no easy task. Here is a good advice from a father for his daughter in finding the right guy. This is sweet and touching at the same time.

1. Date a boy who makes you happy, but marry him only if he makes you laugh deep-belly rumbles that hurt your ribs as they expand outwards. Date him when he sees that you’re hurting and he gives you a moment to feel that pain like a handprint spreading across your consciousness, marry him only if he can make you smile even while you’re gross sobbing. The world is not a kind place. You will feel a lot of pain. Make sure you are with someone who makes it all bearable. Humor is an excellent gauge of intelligence. Life gets boring. Find someone who makes the banal interesting.

2. Make sure he has scars on the back of his hands, it’s a good sign he has experience either fighting or making things - creation is an act of selflessness and bruised knuckles are a good sign he knows how to defend himself. You’ve got too much soul to be handled by someone who has never been passionate. If he’s never thrown a punch, let him at least have tasted the insanity of bringing an idea into existence. Rough palms are better than soft ones, they have been salted by this earth and made into leather. Callouses are evidence he has lived, that he has broken skin and been in pain over and over and over again and still came back to the source of it. People rub against each other. Don’t marry him if he can’t handle even a little blister.

3. Before you say yes, get him angry. See him scared, see him wanting, see him sick. Stress changes a person. Find out if he drinks and if he does, get him drunk - you’ll learn more about his sober thoughts. Discover his addictions. See if he puts you in front of them. You can’t change people, baby girl. If they are made one way, it doesn’t just wear off. If you hate how he acts when he’s out of it now, you’re going to hate it much worse eight years down the road. You might love him to bits but it doesn’t change that some people just don’t fit.

Read More

www.datemy.co.uk

A Father’s Recipe For The Man a daughter Should Marry

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Do you know someone single?

We've got some lovely mums, brothers, cousins and friends on datemy.co.uk all added by their Matchmakers. Less than 2 weeks left now of our FREE JULY offer. If you have someone wonderful, who's single and who you'd like to help matchmake you can sign them up for free & get them complete free membership!

Just visit www.datemy.co.uk to get started.

Watch our vid to show you how:

https://vimeo.com/99016780

Happy matchmaking!

datemy.co.uk