dendroculus

[dendroculus]

[dendroculus]

Dog

[dendroculus]

It's really problematic for you to post about dragon fucking. Everyone knows that humans can't consent and that dragons should be with their natural mate, the humble Ford F150 :/

man the last bit of this takes me by surprise every single time i read it. you're right though.

[dendroculus]

[dendroculus]

[dendroculus]

The lion does not concern itself with the bank account balance when a little treat is calling

[dendroculus]

every beastie boys music video is from the viewpoint of a cool bug they found on the ground

[dendroculus]

baby i could treat you so good you just have to get past my strange and off-putting demeanor and my kubrick stare and my inability to behave like a human and the 40 layers of icy fortress walls i have up and answer my riddles three

[dendroculus]

when u are holding a hammer everything looks like a nail -> when u are holding a point and shoot camera every sight looks incomparably ephemerally beautiful

[dendroculus]

When you're a kid you just take trees for granted. Then when you get to be an adult you realize that a fully mature tree cannot be created in an amount of time that fits in a convenient landscaping timeframe for love nor money nor all the powers of science. Then you realize that people are very very very cavalier about chopping them down

[dendroculus]

you get an invite to a gay wedding

you open the card

“WARNING: SHONEN-AI, YAOI, BOYXBOY, THAT MEANS BOY KISSES!!! LIME/LEMON LATER. DON’T LIKE DON’T ATTEND, RSVP PLZ”

[dendroculus]

conservatives have fully lost the plot its actually extremely normal for little kids to pretend to be animals. it's a pretty essential part of their mental development and helps them practice creative skills actually. if a kid comes up to you and says "I'm a kitty cat" you don't need to reality check them. it's fine actually. the correct response is to say "are you? have you caught any mice today? what kind of kitty cat? do you have orange stripes? should we have tuna salad for lunch?"

[dendroculus]

It’s crazy and fucked up that being yourself is actually the solution.

[dendroculus]

what they don’t tell you about online relationships is how easy it is to ruin them by simply having nothing to say. i like you so much but i don’t know how to hang out with you in silence. i don’t know how to text like a person so now you think i hate you. aaaaaaaaa

[dendroculus]

this is how they used to have sex back when everyone was smooth down there and when metaphors weighed more than truth or logic