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Final writing assignment

So for my essay three I decided the best way to justify my argument was to first lead with the research I had found on my topic. I wanted to present the facts to set up my audience for my opinion or argument. It helped to establish the grounds for my argument. The structure of my essay is “here are my facts and this is how it justifies my argument.” In essay two I basically just gathered all of the research on my chosen topic. It was necessary to present this research because I needed it to lay the “framework” for essay four. The main arguments I made to get my point across were “why is it harmful,”  “why is it important to be proactive.” These are the more important points I argued. My essay gives the reader scary facts that are intended to get the audience to understand and hopefully agree with my argument. I used a lot of heath related argument to get my point across. Typically health is topic that is very concerning, or at least should be, to most people. Hopefully this will help keep the reader interested and informed by my research. And as intended, agree that the research supports my argued points.

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my whiney weekly post

I should be happy that the semester is winding down and it's almost summer break. But this week has been extremely trying. On top of having two exams and long essay due I've encountered a few other misfortunes this week. For starters my daughters grandfather died (no not my dad) unexpectedly. I feel horrible that we weren't even able to make it to his funeral because I had a lab that I couldn't miss. Then last night my car got broken into and my purse was stolen. Yes, I know I shouldn't leave my purse in the car but you just never think it's going to happen to you. Aside from the rather large amount of money that the thief charged on my credit card, it's just such a hassle to have to replace everything. A guy has no idea how much crap a women can keep in her purse. When the officer asked me what was in my wallet, I could only respond with "my life", which pretty much sums it up. It makes a person feel angry, helpless, and just violated to have their property tampered with and important, some irreplaceable, things taken from them. Oddly enough, I actually have to appear in court on Monday because I was a witness to a robbery. So I'm going to court on Monday just after I got robbed on a Thursday. I guess it's true what they say....no good deed goes unpunished.

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Changing the medium

When a video is used as the medium it is almost like it is showing you the story not just telling you a story. Sometimes using a video, or a picture book, or even a PowerPoint can help portray the message the author is trying to get across more clearly. It can help the reader/viewer to better understand what the point of the text is. Some people are more visual in their learning than others so changing the medium can be more helpful to a visual learner. Trisha Campbell using active digital images to keep the viewers attention also helping them to understand the content of the video. Using a video can help keep the viewer more interested and including text with it, or having a reading of the text incorporated in with the video, can help make the subject matter of the video easier to understand.

  I personally don’t find the content of this video to be an interest of mine, so I imagine it would be even harder for me to follow if I had to read it simply in text form. Changing the medium helps to “spice” up an essay, especially an academic one that most casual readers will find boring. I think that this particular video was a little repetitive with the imaging it used, but it was certainly better than just reading the text form. I think the author could have done some things in the video to help keep the viewers attention. I know the video is supposed to be informative on the topic but keeping a monotone voice throughout made it a little boring to listen to on one hand, but on the other it helped set the mood or tone of the content. It is a way of showing the viewer that the content of the video was not humorous but educational if you will. Tone is something that is very hard to determine in text. Reading versus speaking can make a sentence that was meant to be funny into something that just seems out of place in your essay. Changing the medium can show the viewer/reader, for example, a picture that correlates with that particular sentence in an essay to help them understand the humor of it. Changing the medium from plain old text to something creative is a great way to keep your work creative and enjoyable while still getting across the intended message.

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weekly post

So the past two weeks in class we have been doing oral presentations. It's been interesting to hear what my classmates are writing they're research papers on. There has been a lot of diversity, but also a few topics that are closely related. I chose to write my essay on the negative effects of obesity, but there were a few other health related essays as well. There was an essay on male nurses, on what we put into our bodies, art therapy. It was interesting to hear other people researching a variety of different health realated aspects. It was also good that we were allowed to comment on everyones topics. It helps you brainstorm ideas for your paper when you can some insight from your peers and sometimes they bring points to view that I hadn't even though to include in my writing. So I look forward to hearing the rest of the presentations this week.

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does it make sense to you?...no

The argument is that the speaker feels that if your choose to be in America then you should speak the native language and if your going to choose to live in Alabama then the state isn't going to provide resources in any other language. The speaker tries to make his argument seem reasonable by saying "we live in America so if you're here then you need to learn to speak english." He also tries to make his words sound reasonable by choosing to say "if you wanna live here then learn it" instead of saying "if you don't speak English then you shouldn't live here." He says "I guess it's just the business man in me", I think he makes this statement to sound more credible and intelligent or that you should trust his opinion, or that because he is a business man this makes him more ethical, though I think it does just the opposite and makes me want to challenge his ethics.

I don't necessarily support these facts, but if I did then I would have to assume the majority of his intended audience already does speak english. I assume that he must be very prideful in the state of Alabama to publicly speak some possibly controversial words. One of his big inconsistencies is that he says he's a business man. What does that really have to do with his argument. I really don't see the correlation between being a business man and his argument that Alabama citizens should speak English. If anything, it's like he's arguing that the people in Alabama should conform..."we don't need drivers tests in 12 different languages"....."If you're going to live in Alabama, then learn to speak the language"......I thought conformity was on it's way out of America. We should all act the same, dress the same, live one lifestyle, and now speak ONE language. I could understand if he was arguing from a stance on illegal aliens who would most likely speak a diverse variety of languages, but even some United States natives/citizens use spanish, french, german, etc. as their first language. What about schools? Most high schools require you to take at least 2 years of foreign language, is that going to be taken out of the curriculum of Alabama schools since he thinks the state should only communicate in English? Aside from the inconsistencies, his stance/argument opens up to a lot of question and and counter-argument, not to mention the ethics of it, are frankly, dated.

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its draggingggggg

HAS THIS WEEK BEEN LIKE 5 YEARS LONG OR WHAT

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Confrence on my essay

We havent done anything in class this week expect our confrences, so I guess I'll talk about that? I had my confrence on monday and I didn't mind it. It's actually kind of nice that your professor takes and indivudal interest into every student's essay. It was helpful to get some of his feed back and opinions on my topic as well. Another plus to having the confrence was that he helped me figure out which direction I really wanted to go with my paper. I picked a topic that intrests me. I have a lot of really good ideas about it but they were very scattered and my paper didn't have much organization to it. I wasn't sure which points for my topic were going to be best to do reasearch on because as a whole it was all very broad. He gave me some good pointers to follow when doing my reasearch to help me narrow it down to a few sub-topics under my main topic. Anyway so I guess my point is that I find confrences and peer reviews very helpful to have before I turn in my final essay.

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Essay 2: Justification

 For my research paper I am writing about the negative effects of obesity. I plan to discuss the health aspect of being overweight as well as how it affects the rising cost of medical bills and health coverage. As part of talking about its affect of our health, I want to discuss some of the more prevalent diseases that can be a byproduct of being overweight. I also want to talk about some of the psychological problems that obesity can influence.

I think that this is an important topic because some aspects of our obese society could affect anyone.  Like the rising health care costs, I am young and healthy so why should I have to pay high medical and health care costs just because other people choose to not take care of themselves? Health should be important to everyone, but unfortunately, it often takes a backseat to everything else going on in our busy everyday lives. People need to start making time for the important things because if they allow themselves to become overweight, not only will it affect their quality of life, but also it will become very costly to get the appropriate medical care.

My essay doesn’t exactly cater to a specific field, but it should interest all types of audiences especially to those who are already overweight. There are so many good resources available now that can help someone who is ready to take the steps to get healthy. Consulting with a medical professional, joining a gym, learning to eat right, these are all ways to get started with leading a healthier lifestyle.

Another reason I think that this is an important topic is because of childhood obesity. Sadly, it to is on the rise. I recognize that there are medical conditions that can cause weight gain that is out of a person’s control, not always, but often and overweight child is the product of an overweight parent. A parents eating and activity habits have a very strong influence on the type of lifestyle that their children will lead. Because of this, there has also been a spike in childhood diabetes, which can start by the mother having gestational diabetes.

Unfortunately, Obesity can be like a chain reaction. An overweight parent can influence their children to become overweight. This in turn can lead to health problems like diabetes, stroke, cancer, heart attack, psychological problems like depression during childhood and adulthood. The more adults that present with these problems, the more it will have a direct influence on the steady increase of health costs. So, it is important that everyone should be aware of the serious risks of being overweight in our already obese nation and that they recognize the consequences of how living an unhealthy lifestyle can affect more than just thems.

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Sandy Hook Class Discussion

So this week in class we had a really long discussion about the Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting. I hate talking about it and I hate hearing about it, it just makes me sad all over again. I didn't know anyone there personally but we have all heard so many recaps of the tragic events that took place in Newtown, Conneticut. And we've seen the pictures of all the young and innocent lives lost.  I know that this bothers anybody with a heart but I guess because I have a 4 year old daughter I just find it very hard to comprehend how something like this could happen. I can't quite wrap my mind around how some people can commit crimes like these. As a parent I can't imagine sending my daughter off to school like it's a normal day and her never walking out of that school again. The one place in the world you think your children would be safe is in an elementary school classroom, but now many kids have lost that sense of security. One of the hardest things to accept is that the shooter will never be tried for his crimes, those families will never get the closure they deserve. I am glad that so many students in our class were willing to discuss this and so many of them knew lots of information about the shooting. It shows that they cared enough to follow the stories and stay updated on the situation. I'm pretty sure it will be a sore subject for a long time and will never be easy to talk about or comprehend what happend at that school but I guess that just shows how much compassion so many people have for others.

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Stasis on Obesity and the importance of being healthy

I am doing my research paper on the negative effects of obesity and the importance of staying active and being healthy. Obesity has been a very popular topic lately in the United States because so many Americans are overweight.  We are considered one of the “fattest” countries in the world.  This topic interests me particularly because I find I find my health very important. I exercise on a daily basis because I know how important it is maintain a healthy lifestyle and to not promote obesity. Another reason I find this to be an important topic is because I don’t want my daughter to think that it is ok to be overweight. I want her to lead a healthy and active life and the best way for me to do that is to lead by example.  On a broader spectrum obesity also can affect things like medical insurance, it can increase your risk of many diseases, it can even impact the ability to do simple things climb stairs or tie a pair of shoes.

Facts:

It is unhealthy to be obese

It increases the risk of many diseases

Staying active can reduce the risk of becoming overweight

Eating healthier can reduce the risk of obesity

An overweight society increases health costs for everyone

Issues:

Not staying healthy can shorten your lifespan

Reducing obesity now can lead to healthier future generations

Overweight parents influence childhood obesity.

Many Americans can not afford the growing costs of health care as it is

Healthful foods can be more expensive than eating unhealthy

People who become overweight often don't know how to get back to leading a healthy lifestyle

Stakeholders:

Future generations

Unhealthy adults

Healthy adults who have to pay high health care costs because of our unhealthy society

One of the specific topics I plan to identify in my research paper are the negative health effects of being overweight. It can increases your chances of suffering a heart attack, it makes a person more likely to have high blood pressure, and to develop diabetes. As I said before it is extremely important to me that my daughter does not become overweight, I want her to lead as healthy of a lifestyle as possible. It should be important to everyone to stay healthy and avoid obesity so in my essay I plan to stress some of the reasons I find it most important and to point out many of its negative effects.

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What is reality?

So this week in class we have been discussing "The allegory of the cave" and the "reality" of the prisoners. We've been asked, what is reality? Most of the class replied that reality is truth. Or at least what we know to be truth. So what is truth? I would define truth as what we know to be real within the boundaries of the knowledge that we have. We acquire our individual boundaries of knowledge through what our parents tell us, through our course of education, and even our own life experiences. Reality is defined as the state of things as they actually exist or a thing that is actually experienced or seen. So if I were to take that statement at face value then the other planets in our universe are not part of my reality. I have not actually seen them exists so therefore they do not and are not reality to me. If I don’t take that statement so literally then I know that other planets do exist because I have knowledge of them from being educated. So what I know to be reality could be completely different than what someone else knows to be reality. We can only know what is real by possessing the knowledge to confirm the reality’s existence.

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Stasis theory on "The Elusive Big Idea"

The conjecture of this essay can be summed up from one important sentence. "we prefer knowing to thinking because knowing has immediate value." The problem is that nobody wants to think for themselves anymore, everyone just wants that instant gratification of having the answer. According to the author, this is the problem. "Big ideas" used to be byproducts of some of the most brilliant minds but times have changed. We are so technologically advanced as a society that it can be crippling. It's like a blessing and a curse. This can be changed, people can choose to be more inquisitive, more driven to want to learn and discover, to think for themselves. From a larger prospective, the younger generations are becoming less and less independent minded. It's like everyone has just lost curiosity. Like nobody has the ability to wonder, to question what they are reading. They're taking the information they read on google and that's enough for them. We often don't have "big ideas" ourselves because it's so much more convenient to borrow someone else's. It is a good thing that we have resources like the internet or other types of media readily available. But, this doesn't mean you should lose your ability to think, or to let your mind be open and curious. I wouldn't say it's a "serious" problem, but how long can society just recycle ideas before they eventually have to come up with new ones. If new ideas are not brought about then the way we live now will be how it's always going to be. If at least one person doesn't "think big" then we will do what we always do and have only what we have now. By that I mean, as a society we can not advance unless there are ideas that can move us forward. Someone has an idea, this idea is researched/studied or trials are performed, it may or may not prove to be viable, the concept is shared. Everything we use today was once just somebodys' idea.  To solve this problem we need to encourage the newer generations to THINK and to brainstorm. To not always just accept the knowledge that our predecessors have left us with, but to expand on it. When they come across their own "big idea", put in the work it takes. Even though your "big idea" may sound stupid to some people, it might be revolutionary to others. It is important to remember that the worth of your idea is measured by you and the people that find value in its possible outcomes.

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My review of peer review

When I first heard Mr. Jackson say we were going to be peer reviewing our classmates’ essays I cringed. I'm sure most of us did! I am usually not extremely confident in my writing abilities unless it's a topic that I am very passionate about. In general most of us don't have passion for assigned topics so it was nice that our professor let us "run free" so to speak with our first essay. For starters the topic I chose to write my essay on was one that is unconventional and for some controversial. So naturally I was very nervous to let any of my peers read it. But they did read it and strangely it was almost....liberating? Not only did I get some very helpful and constructive reviews from my peers but they made me feel like it was a well written paper that other people felt was worth reading. By having my paper reviewed by some classmates I was actually able to get one really great idea in particular that helps me to better stress the important topic of my essay. The advice was actually given to me through the anonymous letter. So if you had asked me on Monday how I felt about my essay being peer reviewed they you probably would've gotten a pretty negative response, but now I am grateful that I had the opportunity in class on Wednesday to get some helpful suggestions before turning in my final draft.

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Anonymous letter

To whom it may concern,

After reading your essay I think your main purpose was to stress the impact that sports and being active has on our everyday lives. You were very clear in this argument. Your paper has a title that would be appealing to a large audience because such large pools of people enjoy sports.

  As I was reading through your essay it was very easy for me to tell what you were arguing. I do agree with your side of the argument, it is very important to keep sports and physical activity in our lives. I found a lot of your examples to be very relatable for me as well. I think you did a good job supporting your ideas with real life examples and personal experiences also.

  I think your ideas did flow and stay consistent throughout the essay but in some places they became a little redundant. I definitely felt your opinion very strongly in the paper. Which is a good thing because it made me think that you do actually have a passion for the subject you were writing about. This is important to me as the reader because if you can’t make yourself passionate for the opinion you are arguing than how are you going to convince the reader to feel the same? By you writing about your own experiences as an athlete it showed me reasoning behind the stance you took on the importance of keeping sports in our lives.

  One point I think you could touch on besides the physical and healthful aspects of playing sports is character building. Go a little further into how sports influence moral, teamwork, and the ability to work successfully with others. You could even venture into how having a common interest, like sports, could affect the family unit. For example, bringing families together for Sunday night football, or a dad playing catch with his son. These are also some important points you could make that would still be relatable to the audience.

  As for the technical points in your essay I would really go through and edit your paper for grammar and punctuation errors. I would maybe google to get some good tips on how to eliminate some of your comma splices if you’re unsure how to do so. Sometimes when you have a lot of really long sentences broken up by several commas it can affect the coherence of the essay to the reader.

  Overall I thought your essay was pretty good for a rough draft. It was an easy read and again it was really great that you used examples that would be relatable to a lot of people. It is important for the reader to be able to establish that connection. Definitely work on the grammar and punctuation and I think you will have a very well written essay!

  Sincerely,

  Ellie Braunfeld

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Empty Rhetoric

So in class we’ve been talking about rhetoric, what it is, and what components make up a “rhetorical situation”. But when all of that is missing then your rhetoric is considered “empty”. Empty rhetoric is when someone speaks and their words convey intentions and commitments, but there is no follow through. Empty rhetoric usually sounds good coming out of someone’s mouth but falls short on the action side.

President Obama is very often accused of using empty rhetoric in his speeches. He is a very smooth talker. I think people find it hard to believe what he says because he has so many times been accused of speaking with empty rhetoric. America thinks he makes a lot of hollow promises.

Speaking with rhetoric is a skill. To speak or to write persuasively and with a purpose is not always easy. Sometimes it’s a lot easier to fill a speech or a paper with empty words than is to put thought into what you are saying or writing. This semester I hope to learn how to better develop my writing skills in hopes of writing well thought out essays that don’t contain (as much) empty rhetoric.

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Activism or Racism?

When I first heard the ballot and the bullet I could tell he was speaking to a very large and loud audience. Malcolm X sounded motivational to the crowd also bringing in various religious aspects. "He believes in fighting on all fronts." After listening to him speak I can interpret that he only fights on the front for african americans. Malcolm X was an activist for black rights but when he speaks it sounds like he is walking the fine line between activist and racist.

My view of him changed when Malcolm X said that the days of white people being superior are long gone. On one hand I don't see color I only see people and I don't find any race to be superior to another and I understand that it was a different time in 1964 when he first gave this speech but it was a time when the discrimination of african americans was ending. When the divides between whites and blacks were fading. On the other hand by him being such an advocate for black nationalism its almost like he wanted to keep that divide but to have blacks in the positions of power that whites had previously held.

Malcolm refers to white people as the "enemy." He tells his audience that white people brought african americans to this country involuntarily, so therefore they are the enemy and we should not rely on the enemy to run our communities and give us jobs. Malcolm felt that "his people" were being punished for being black. Suffering from "political oppression." I agree with him in the sense that african americans were sill suffering from political oppression, but agin this came with the time in which this speech was given. I don't believe the solution to end this suffering was by further segregation our communities. Yes african americans should have employment, jobs, housing, education just as every other race should be entitled to these things. But his economic philosophy, which had some valid points on the expansion of smaller businesses becoming larger companies, was pretty warped.

I share his view on separating our religious views from community and employment. That our "religion is our PERSONAL business." That your religious philosophy is between you and the god that you believe in, but segregating the different races of our communities just to feel like your in a position of power will only lead to more issues in the future.

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Babies sleep helps moms stress

In this article the argument presented is whether or not a baby should be allowed to cry itself to sleep (self-soothe) or should the mother comfort the baby. According to the article the amount of sleep the baby gets is crucial to the amount of sleep the mother get which is directly related to the mothers stress levels.

The target audience for this article would most likely be mothers and fathers, maybe even health professionals. Someone who is not a parent would find it more difficult to relate to this article or take a position for or against a baby self-soothing to fall asleep. From the context in the article it is not really specific on whether or not self-soothing is a good or bad thing. In the study referenced, the amount of time it takes for a baby to cry itself to sleep lessened over a short period of time but the cortisol levels of the infant did not decrease. However the mothers cortisol levels did decrease when it too the infant less time to self-soothe. If the mother has lower cortisol levels then this means she is less stressed and a less stressed mother is generally able to better care for her child. My response to this article is that self-soothing is more beneficial to the mother and the baby than the mother constantly picking the baby up every time it cries. Babies are going to cry, this will help the infant eventually establish between their wants and their needs as they grow into toddlers. The goal of allowing the infant to self-soothe is that they will eventually develop a sleep routine and correlate their crib with going to sleep, thus allowing the mother to get some rest enabling her to be less stressed when caring for her infant.